Pete Davidson - Realistic Weed Commercials

thank you guys welcome to Just for Laughs all-access how are you there good nice it's nice to be here this Montreal have a big beef with Toronto why because they said yeah I don't understand I said the last glass I thought your savior of Canada was from Toronto your Drake you're [ __ ] half handsome [ __ ] Savior and yeah I thought he was running through here with what his woes through here you know what sucks about that song when I first heard it and he was talking about running through the six with his woes I actually thought it was dope I was like wow that's really cool and then I found out was meant friends not so [ __ ] cool anymore why don't you just say friends Ron in two to six with my friends yeah yeah I thought I thought was I thought he was like sad though he's like one through six with his sadness that's just what he calls his [ __ ] stupid friends sorry bets we got me smoking weed all day cuz your city does not give a [ __ ] for some reason it's amazing they don't care at all they like it they cheer it on like I went to hide it anyway in one of the Kosmos like no place is awesome we have I live in Brooklyn we have anti weed commercials we have anti way and they're all terrible they're all really bad and I know it's cliche to say but to paint a picture for there's a couple of them one of them as a very famous one there's a girl and she's with a friend and her friend is the couch and then uh and then she goes my friends a little different all right go yeah she's a couch now she didn't smoke weed and turn into a couch like it wasn't she she cut a hole in the couch then took all this stuff out and then when I got in and put a head out something you just have a dumb friend that's all I've never taken a hit of a joint me like well [ __ ] just slither in there another another famous weed commercial we have there's like a bunch of kids at a basketball court and these thugs go up to this little nerdy kid and they're like yo man you're all smoke which I've never been intimidated into smoking weed nobody's ever held at me though he's been like hey face what smoke weed it's always been like like that's it it's as far as it goes so thugs go up to little kid like yo man you won't smoke weed and this little kid goes smoke weed smoke fools like you on the bball court I'm just sitting there high like what a dumb kid you could do both I don't have a problem with anti weed commercials there are negative side effects to wheat it's just like you should just make real ones like use me and my friend like I'd make anti wheat commercials there's just me and my friend and I'm on the couch and my friends like yo P yo p yo what weed that's the whole entire commercial very low budget very low budget and then a follow-up commercial me and my buddy are at the mall I'm and my friends like Oh a crock store and I go I heard they're mighty comfortable and then we buy crocks weed that's the entire [ __ ] commercial really low budget really little budget I recently got a clean bill of health my dicks good really happy with that you know that feeling sir you clapped right away are you like me anytime I see a mark on my dick I'm like huh there it is there is I got it I always think I got it's always it's always something little it's always like I jerked off and like didn't wash and then like something's gonna happen you know like if you [ __ ] eat cheese doodles all day and then [ __ ] play with your balls and then you don't shower like there's repercussions for that you can't do that no I I got I want to I go to free clinics do you have free clinics I hear you have free healthcare so all of you are [ __ ] I don't have to wear a condom with anybody that's what that means right no [ __ ] anyway sorry do you uh you ever go to a free clinic man no just uh hoping the Lord takes care of you some guys bike I just don't want to know I go to a free clinic they prick your finger to test you for AIDS and then they just give you a number they give you a number and then you sit down with a bunch of other people that had fun yesterday and then you [ __ ] when you wait for them to just call out your number and say yes or no like AIDS bingo did you just sit there literally someone won't get on the mic and be like thirty three oh three three [Applause] at one time I had this guy he tested clean and he came out of the office anyway I [ __ ] her in my car with no condom nothing and he ran out the greatest thing I've ever seen alive in my car you see if number 34 like shaking freaking out it's been seven knows in a row do four yes they won't tell you you have AIDS they'll be like 34 come back here please hope you like charity Oh nobody got that that's okay I don't make any noise but I have sex it's partly because I'm uncomfortable but I don't I'm very quiet like you could read the night before Christmas when I have sex it's dead silent I don't even make noise when I come when I come I'm just kind of like I come like a baby registering something for the first time you ever like show a baby like the sunset for the first time they're all like what material did you expect honestly coming to see at 21 did you think I was gonna have opinions like actual things really I don't know anything about politics I have no idea and it wouldn't even work here cuz you don't have what we have in America which is I don't know yeah I try to get into politics but I can't every time I turn on CNN the guys like the Senate I'm like I can't [ __ ] do it we have a Senate now I'm hanging out with my grandpa it's weird my grandpa seeps over on Tuesdays cuz he goes to this place called the Knights of Columbus I don't know if you have him out here if you don't know what it is it's like it's like a club for old men where they just go and slowly like die together each week and they have like matching shirts and they go together and they just die together and he sleeps over when he goes there because he gets trashed with his buddies and I don't like when he sleeps over because my grandpa sleeps in death position like he seems like this and old people don't breathe in their sleep like they don't they don't breathe like us they breathe like it the last second cuz their bodies like oh I'm gonna die if I don't yeah so it's not even like a breath it's like a Yelp it's weird like a normal person sleeps like this like a normal person is like mmm my grandpa does this and it's really hard to jerk off when that's going on [Applause]

Channel: Just For Laughs

Views: 10,829,687

Keywords: Just for laughs, just for laugh, just for laughs youtube, youtube just for laughs, just laughs, just laugh, funny, comedy, comedian, stand up, stand up youtube, standup youtube, standup, stand up comedian, pop culture, snl, tv, pete davidson, pete davidson comedy, pete davidson comedian, pete davidson weed, weed commercial, weed comedy, pete davidson snl, anti weed commercials, anti weed, anti-weed commercial, pete davidson youtube, youtube pete davidson, pete davidson drake

Id: 4pF5ClsvP_0

Length: 9min 36sec (576 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 23 2018