MST3K 701T - Night Of The Blood Beast

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I can't control his sanity with the help other science to yourself it's just a show I should really just relax did I tell you my mother's here Hey Happy Thanksgiving see the game okay what a goal-line stand game Oh inches took the extra base from inside the pain then deep inside the redzone way past the blue line not in this kitchen climb the ladder and that icing Oh rookie the air Conn Smythe Trophy 50 60 70 yard line whoa what more Magor and a great slap shot hey Betty wish push that up I see back back back upside down again whoa no way in hell he was way over the blue line and he left a 710 split standing go how I love Australian rules football ah yeah master calling and just when he got a takedown takedown takedown don't boys oh you're here uh listen I need you to snap to my mom's here and I promise to take over the world before pie is served so help me out I won't destroy you well think about hey looks like you got a regular playboy after dark shindig going on there oh yes it's Frank he invited him last April even in the effort life mocks me so it is the Star Trek Voyager or something nothing no mother this is my experiment remember where our shot is that you why pearl how good to see you Oh aren't you rogue it has been so long ah you're looking radiant pearl 10 years younger since the scars were sanded off oh you charmer you so you work with my spawn yeah pretty much run the place oh these are the guys that work for me mm-hmm well this makes me feel a little bit better about this whole experiment thing so now what Clayton I suppose you have to push some buttons or take some urine samples Yes Mother now the experiment begins right now Frank brings me a fresh movie to spool up at Oh God you don't have a movie do you look well no I thought this might happen sir oh here this is one of my favorites it's called Knight of the blood nice and you'll just need it it stinks reminds me of Clayton's father ah oh and there's a short subject - it's about telephones or some damn thing it sucks on toast give me dr. F man I just went in the tabbouleh you may want to take it up in that bag now look just like fresh step how many times Michael Jackson and lisa-marie got sex awful I was known as something of a chick handler myself pretty crowded honeymoon huh it's springtime for Hitler in Germany we directs the best honeymoons Lucy I'm dead once upon a time or maybe it should be twice upon a time because this story begins for most stories in there was a bit of excitement up on cloud 7 on this particular morning the head angel had called a conference to talk about Jeff and Mary and their guardian angel Wilbur was late fairies will leave every chair up in the place out to look for that's hi fellas let's get this show on the road it's already on the road I'm sorry chief we got so many new clients we'll have to open a new branch off these clients are your immediate concern if you want to keep your license oh yes sir yes sir yes sir chief for Bucks energies are made in heaven but there's follow-up work to you want I should show her a good time Jeff and Mary have been married for a year and they haven't had a real honeymoon yet acquaintance is unusual they're starting on their honeymoon today that's what they think - but they're going to find out differently unless you get down there right away and take care of thing I want them eliminated come up something is coming up in exactly 30 seconds oh now get going yes sir chief John oh just go you big poof whoa oh dear god I hate Peter people sir should we get on to Wars or starvation or anything or no mrs. Muir I love it when I get a call in my pants just answer my hairdryer here will but make yourself invisible oh I almost forgot he's trying to have a Montclair moment hey now they'll get the Immaculate reception you know I had an angel rotten in my chimney once I'm sorry chief I've got to get organized besides no one could see me up here yes officer I'm down awesome uh-huh look there's a frisbee in the gutter no angel dust they live in a dollhouse no they should fire grandma as their decorator I'm leaving you know I thought I was leaving you we got everything everything including you oh so hot Wow let's go then yeah the Pope about the one sexual position Iran to us hello yeah this is Court oh hello Gordon and goodbye Gordon Mary and I are just leaving now wait a minute something's come up it can't come up when I finish the score for the show you said I could take Mary on our honeymoon we waited a year now and we're going not hold on Jeff it's Sonia I wishing number the words are okay but he doesn't care much about the music if we don't have a new tune by tomorrow morning's you're not gonna sign for the show look Gordon rehearsals don't start for four weeks yet and I haven't had it in years honeymoon now listen Jeff eg Marshall is he home come up with that new music there won't be any show and there won't be any honeymoon now you can write a new melody in 24 hours it's no problem at all you must have at least a dozen old tunes lying around waiting so we won't have sex no problem at all in me completely out of blow excuse me while I light my spleef what would Liberace do and I better not do that one of 32 short films about this guy now let's see what rhymes with blue balls a minute I work for godus elevators I don't write music Wiki walk came over to know no inspiration darling I couldn't write the farmer in the Dell deck why would you want to write him a temperamental ballerina EEZ look it's way past dinner time you haven't eaten lunch we had three packs I'm not how fixing coffee now give this to the man in the kitchen Oh another one of your scores is falling apart yes it bother you batting yes only you did Jeffrey the dear boy that I loved his words but I want more wishing in the wishing song you're absolutely right he couldn't agree with you more he's working on it right now it's almost finished who shut up i Copperbottom get another sandwich dear pull hard enough I can snap my head off I wish I had a castle in the sky wishing one-handed crap in the other and see which piles up first a way up high where bluebirds like to fly I wish I could have sex with Louie 900 the little castle with a hundred runs on Mars I wouldn't have to dress like tipper gore with stars for windows clouds for rugs I wish honey I'm trying to compose in here if you could keep it down I just wish I had a decent kitchen look dangers weren't about as hard as workers with a little pecorino I wish I wish the faucet wouldn't drip all day aim high sister I wish Hardware Hank hadn't done my kitchen I wish that refrigerator door would close and stay close oh sure everyone dumped on the refrigerator fine miss Betty Furness in the new Westinghouse I wish I had a stove whose pilot light was always lit well don't look for it now it's only available in the year 2000 furthermore a kitchen phone at hanwen friends call up to chat a bit hello yes this is Mary how are you most unique and Davos every I a brand new think a built-in oven oh this is my new refrigerator and also to talk about never to new collections gonna call you later it's all part of my kitchen fantasy entered into drink no no you didn't have some bear gall juice honey I wish my living room were all redone I think owning a newspaper would be fun drapes new rugs all this buzz my god honey what have you done to our lives it's nice to have a telephone plan with my new drapes and rug a living room bad fall bang-bang-bang only a kiss fat spoiling on hill but by being [ __ ] aren't they wonderful this might actually be sex right here okay we're gonna put you there I wrote this one for Scott Carson meanwhile soldiers are dying in the mud and North Korea two actors that's her [ __ ] wither look bedroom should be changed completely - yeah hang a parachute put up the beer can collection perhaps a color scheme of gold and blue that's about as sexy as a garage I might try dusty road one bed for them the other ones for a little grandma Jeff and I were gonna get the racing car bed but we decided empties ladylike to have a change no no no no none of that the yellow room with their cars and white and maybe telecom and lights up at night I wish I may I wish I might wow sort of a Western you gimme oriental Danish modern desk Prairie school sort of thing huh pills pills pills pills where are the pills we gotta get out of here I smell gas hello hello they hung up here's how far I've gotten law the Gordon's sitting there like a vulture calling back mm-hmm maybe I'll have in a day or two but not tonight I haven't got one idea let the rub against tonight don't say rub or grinder moister harder missile is lying busy we'll try it again if he and Sonia can't wait I don't care what they do just get away from me honey is that a gay man on a Johnson's roof should we get a gay man for our roof honey why don't we call him later no no you know your damn secretary fine honey your cocaine is all over the phone do you wanna wait I'm gonna do that again yeah okay no Russell your skirt now flap your arms and run the vacuum yeah yeah why not I'll call someone to write this sad again do it again everybody was kung foo fighting Eric Schreber Akula sort of thing don't worry about my carpal tunnel syndrome or anything good boy you can be trained really love your peaches wanna shake your tree damn you ruined it again hello hello Gordy I've been trying to get Jeff Sonya's here how's it coming wonderful you want to eat something you bet I'll turn on the speakerphone I want sunny of the earth fine miss I wish I had a castle in the sky oh where I'm castle with the sky crack we're opening tomorrow to having some trouble hearing come on I'm trying to get her phone working JEP hey wait a minute okay playing the song until come on we all get in how the hell's the sing the song from the beginning we go home elephant hey hey leave room for the Holy Ghost welcome to Shakey's Elton John is here this would be a good companion film with Eraserhead I love it such a little such skin it's such a revulsion I said kids bring it in Jeff and go on your honeymoon Walter Cronkite approves check it hums lingerie for me in you let's go to your mother's baby will lock up okay Jeff they're all set on this end go right ahead now the monks of st. Gregory work on their next big chart busting hit I'll just order the hit Oh chief this is Wilbur mission accomplished I'll be right out the time now I can do the decorating oh I'll see what tad and Bryce are up to I'm losing his pattern captain the following scene contains graphic sexual content who the hell is it about anyway oh hi hey what do you guys want with turkey stuffing or potatoes stuffing or potatoes Mike yeah well funny you should ask as my colleague dr. Tom servo and I are now prepared to publish our findings on the entire stuffing versus potato controversy excuse me Mike we'll need the space cambot lights nothing versus potatoes stuffing a complex mixture of grains vegetables and fiber the potato nature's bouncing daddy stuffing the combination of the four earth elements fire water sky and crumbs potato silent enemy of the Kolar January 8 1994 stuffing pulls child from burning building New York City eat the potatoes watch helplessly of matters beaten to death now let's turn to our scientific findings the skin or jacket of the potato is incredibly poisonous and will killed in an instant centrifuge test proved that stuffing is a better vehicle for Grady potato Norwegian rat of the vegetable kingdom spreading typhus and gonorrhea as it jumps from ship to ship in the world busiest port cities and now Mike a short film stopping balm in Gilead vs. potato a tide Hydra destroyer of worlds give me liberty or give me death but with dinner I'll have stuffing this is my stuffing eat me thank you that's all cold that's it yep ah okay I guess they know your decision that absolutely because uh you know I was gonna have both both is great both is going to have by living Cragen whoosh yeah don't what's his deal night club moves Scott on the iguana sausage blood sausage music by Ray Manzarek scott mccloud space angel thank you i lost your trailer hey ed Nelson of ed Nelson Plumbing & Heating free hot dogs for the kids from a sentence by Jean Horton NASA simulation no man help the conductors having a seizure dick courier when dick absolutely positively has to be there overnight isn't this the Paulo Pepsi and dance number to buy both it's bit States been thoroughly corpsman eyes you know I don't know that much about space but it seems like they're just wandering around there's a team Foreman signature there's going to be some turbulence seeing as we have one wing Rome the Sun and fun capital of the world and now our story this is excellent honor to goldenrod next one out of the goldenrod do you read me over when I fly the real one I'll have more stuff normal descent on instruments daughter sent on instrument this thing won't boot out at 90 thousand feet approaching critical velocity and I have a bulbous growth in my nose something wrong I probably too fast so I'll just pull everything out I'm in trouble I just don't make my speed okay I'm switching to blend how are they gonna bite you if it returns a little forever if it doesn't then that was never allowed to be away oh I'm being severely backlit there's no dragon I've got it too close to the earth I'm afraid of intimacy oh I knew I was lactose intolerant but Oh Pete my pizza Oh anymore I can do now yes to my party tape hmm 10 miles northeast your location in case your corners damaged get this thousand seven under miles weight ratio 187 Dustin daughter 20 tons dance totally filled starts right Patrol in color why Houston doesn't waste much time got a guy in a jeep right out there someone's burning leaves and NASA is there lands and dad available in Loudoun camel stone pant and quark mark trail with gore-tex I told you no hot plates I couldn't get the jaws of life so I brought Cindy she's really strong Nance's highly sophisticated firefighting techniques anyone here need off Cindy clear the shot hit the ocean I know it's Spooner Wisconsin Gary hi I'm Bill Proxmire I'm running for Senate his pops build lays a mess you got a moist towelette hmm should have sent up a dog first I'll have a sandwich that's okay Oh Kelly Ella's a my other excuse me could you move your entrails aside Vanna bork white on the scene oh I'm fine don't worry about me um am i having a feeling - do I need a perm their space program ain't so good yeah breaker one-niner for the big booty we got a spam in the can and we'll catch you on the big bounce around over bill the rod Baker to go about Abel it's not that alive anymore over goldenrod Baker to Goldenrod April the rest of NASA rushes to the scene going rock Baker to go around April 1 their night know there's a planet and it is total rock Baker to go the rod able huh hold on were switching all power to the radio Fitz Gary I'm not here did you find it came down about three miles east of Walker's past area 1 1 6 or 1 1 7 on your map how bad is he you ever see stroganoff bought it all the way yes certain no respiration no heartbeat no pulse came down pretty hard the rocket unit still in one piece Oh thing killing it everything else has scouted around for about half a mile including Bob fell Donna to cover the entire area Canaveral will want all the visual data we can give them oh and uh don't move anything when we get there Nolan right Baker out look a frog I'm terribly sorry Julie you're gonna have to scooch over understand how you feel I lost a husband once oh we can't let it interfere with the work we have to do you both knew it was a calculated risk so Arby's everyone I'll be all right doctor no I'm fine - don't even ask get going this is back NASA what's family owned enough before this decade is out we will put a man in a pickup truck and bring him safely to Mendocino County it's great how they can run the space program and then sell corn from their flatbed truck phone what should I do with my gum don't play honey no dr. wily I want you to get full coverage on the entire area you want to take a dump picture this is your first project on the dr. Lyman wasn't oh I've been under in before yeah I helped design the jettison you if it didn't work then remember that other thing that didn't work a project like this there's always a margin for error you expect it especially when it's you working on it then when it comes you're fine you really didn't expect it after all who knew we needed fuel you think Julie expected it with his engagement ring on her finger not sure what I meant by that John kokorin was the first man to be sent up in a satellite and ejected back to her don't even supposed to come back alive stupid jerk - check the rest of it look Dave don't blame yourself the answer lies on this wreckage let's recheck the crash pad no let's just go hmm mmm no no it's Steve not now hey the rug is escaping this is like night of the ground squirrel Oh No Patrick Stewart fell in the quicksand and action hi NASA that's funny what's that this rip was smaller when we first got here with the stress of settling into the ground of whitening um yes I'll get that beating fellas made a magnet ready Milo I'd like to examine the body before we bring it out I'll need to be nude watch you don't cut yourself doctor be very careful with my hat it's a nice little Quonset hut spaceship he's got honey your mother's worried why aren't you getting up for school now kid see righty-tighty lefty-loosey did he have a skull when we sent him up not leastly can strip him for parts dr. Benton quickly bring my back I'd never asked me for his bag at home oh man she's getting it thanks I need my tennis shoes boy this is cool this is just like alien autopsy yeah it's gorgeous Davis look how daddy is yeah it's probably an outpatient thing how long would you say dead let's see ever since I've known him in at least three hours he's the crash over three hours no sign of body rigidity well that's nothing new a skin discoloration temped it feels normal you know let's give more time to die no dilation whatsoever hmm all the death must be due to an internal rupture he should have worn a cup I've never seen an internally damaged body with no sign of rigor mortis after so long and I love it let's get back to the lab so we can continue the examination is your freezer empty fudge on this capsule it's a girl this meal words I could raise these and make good money at home hop dr. Weiman he wants to take John back to the lab sphagnum peat moss babe that's really gross like it it all started at a 500 watt radio station in Fresno California please no terrorists this area restricted area trespassers are shot on sight of the governor Nasus fruit truck makes a delivery I have to question whether this is really a government operation well we had a snap min to like our frozen dog to get him out of the space capsule but I think you how's this work hello Everglade hello Everglade this is goldenrod this is goldenrod how do you receive or I'm putting a burrito in the microwave you guys want anything that's not the question are we transmitting they don't receive anything promise they won't dry and reaches until the frequency check at right o'clock hmm hmm what should I wear to a funeral hmm anyone wants sandwiches I'm heading into town huh it's a little low on air all medical standards this man is dead so just like before then a heartbeat no respiration never seen a man so dead his tissues refuse to dissipate well I'm gonna make on the possible TV and I'll what kind of catatonic state they still be alive no get out on a pipe on metabolism that's impossible maybe he's dead it's hard to stop there's no circulation you know as well as I do that when this process stops the brain starts to deteriorate almost at once when a matter of three minutes have died there's like he's dead or something hello Everglade hello Everglade this is goldenrod this is goldenrod how do you receive over I'm a photo grow fur Kiki maybe after this one radio silence will switch over to an emergency Channel I mean that's what I do write it how about the Air Force maybe they're home hello Air Force emergency this is special cqd goldenrod station how do you receive over Air Force is so stuck-up strange all process I couldn't receive the spot weather report of the suit yeah are you sure it's not your set I've already checked everything we got nasty to come in here minute okay Steve I could have done that hello Everglade hello Everglade this is goldenrod this is goldenrod do you receive or no it's still dead nothing hello handsome doctor he's got senor wences disease Hey look jelly comes out not a lesion more like something had been forced of the tissue um have you guys seen my brush escaped yes yes yes radio still won't work they wants to see you okay I'll bet they're going nuts the Cape the other partiers me is he working Steve we're gonna need assistance I'll keep fiddling with the corpse I found a Chiclets hey she walked up twice hi have you been helped hey come here and help me shake the candy machine trouble I can't transmit across the room with this thing mmm gold star sounds like a magnetic disturbance yeah could be the power lines balled up outside what's happening in there yeah big spring dance I don't know somehow we've got to get through the Cape five hours overdue now I bet half the brass in the state of Florida's up in arms I open up enough people find out about this we'll have everybody up here I'll check the tower you stay here and keep trying to get through honey yeah all right taking you up to news time with the chucker I think if a yelling bear ran a clown he's getting deader blood pressure 120 over 80 normal for a living man it's impossible doctor you must have a mistake the doctor I checked it twice but you're a girl doctor doctor miss Mendez had normal pressure it's as if he's dead that's impossible inconceivable take a blood sample Oh like radiation but bladder that same evening Dawson will you do miss Ella Fawlty she's a crazy love beast okay there I fixed it you guys ladders loose again goldenrod Everglade goldenrod to Everglade come in Everglade over restricted changing area want to find her picnic stuff goldenrod to Everglade coming Everglade this is an emergency you see Everglade you dickweeds this is a stupid space program I'm gonna go work for my uncle space program the outhouse is connected to the main breaker at NASA you stay in there mr. power yeah interesting me not everybody is Steve Steve Steve cut it out dad Oh dad I don't know pew pew pew pew Danelle and the Steve's are there Steve one you go that way stick to come with me this has Steve written all over it yeah uh-oh I'm not popping mm-hmm hit me it was big like a bear was it a bear I'm out of the darkness was heading for the lab I know I put a couple of shots in it before I went down wanted animal that large isn't good how are we on besides his pistols we've got a couple of rifles I think it headed toward the back of the Billy Dave who's Dave are you sure you're all right yeah yeah just clipped me Steve come on we're late for biology thank you I'll get the costumes you guys be the Yankees and would be the Nazis neat did you get this at Pier one now that in the 10k really lights up the place Steve see Shh wake up dad he's in a really bad mood and the window Donna get the other letter let's talk fast for the rest of the movie did it get to him no what do you think it was this didn't come off any bear bring the light over here buddy oh that's my my back has been flaking off like crazy no fair no bud no disco no foolin around very much like leather can I go home the power out completely no just partly of course it down completely as it is you haven't had it what cause it could be a break in the cable of the damn short second one of the transfer rule Dave you sure the building was thoroughly checked the wiring accuses all right I know everything thoroughly I checked everything hmm I'll check again maybe they shouldn't have launched a rocket while the dryer was running yeah nothing's wrong here like I said it's probably the disturbance up at the dam well Steve need some help boarding the window get Steve on it they're all set in case the birds attack us well at least we won't breathe unless it gets really cold place like this would be equipped with heating until a few months ago this was a radar monitoring station for land it was car wash ultra sensitive instruments respond better to the cooler atmosphere systolic was 140 so this lay off I'll have a blood sample for you in a few minutes make it two you'll take an apple to realize we're incommunicado send a security operation as tight as this maybe another 12 hours mm-hmm could mean we could be here another day ouch everything so little Oh tiny fried eggs who ordered their sunny-side up doctor doctor oh wait never mind I've never seen anything quite like I've never seen a Saltine up close notice the wayside in the other my god I'm pregnant so I'm too little mouth okay I will get about a macho to play with a little for tight Oh God hey cat hi pearl Oh art you are the only sane one do you ever just look at somebody and wonder who the hell they are and what the hell they're doing there it's a screwy world a pearl art you don't know the half of it that guy right there that one times I go that manifested itself into the something I call my son all art what happens kill him that's what I do thanks art you're sweet to listen you know you and I have to get together more often sure anytime you want me to come down there you just press that one button gee art I'd like to but you know my clay has his heart set on ruling the world and a mother has got to support her son no matter what a loser he is you know what art he's my loser okay everyone Shh quiet now quiet now I know you all know who this man but I just wanted you to get reacquainted as I have with this beautiful person sir I love you say hi mr. B say hi say hi say hi to the come on hi lay box o of you sir Oh anytime you want to talk girlfriend oh no I got movie sign Steve you can still lead a full and productive life just reminded when my turtle died that's all what I'm about to say might sound strange but I think we should eat this corpse why don't we so have to drive to the nearest telephone and call it Kate every minute counts what is there is a cartoon in the microscope I've seen amoebic dominance of a cell structure before but this is completely out of proportion what are they what do they mean Oh normal blood has two basic cells the red carry oxygen and the white fight infection you but this blood has three mmm the third cell that big one remember that one the big one here the hair it's completely foreign to any blood structure god I'm in a funk is that bacterial artist contagious then we've all been exposed Hughie I doubt if it's communicable we better get the nearest town fast until you buy imagine that'll be desert city but that's over 30 miles isn't there anything closer he's got to be Pizza Hut nearby nothing on my man Steve I'm gonna kill myself call a Kaitlin desert city get in touch with dr. Zimmerman don't go into detail just tell him to get here as quickly as he can what about equipment yeah I get some of that too I suppose all we need to know power supply your refrigerated truck or an ambulance to transport the body hmm oh and get yourself something nice Thunder ooh request priority clearance directly to Walter Reed Hospital in Washington right I'll be back as soon as I can oh and uh snag some brews and couple sandwiches and a thing of whacked words keep checking the blood pressure doctor the last count was 140 over 80 what a selfish thing to say I thought we did but I'm gonna go walk in front of a bus and stop pulling varnish those little guys go wow you turn the light off in the hall oh so like a blood beast can dismantle a distributor Camp time to dance blood beast Achmed it's those nuns from The Sound of Music Steve Steve any luck with the Jeep I can't figure it out Carlson both the truck and the tapir burnt out it's the most insulting thing you've ever said to me hmm me suppose I should apologize Oh anyway thanks for listening look we missed the first half of friends that both stopped everything's going wrong in this movie he's an odd little man I just did all to picture everyone um if you're looking for that one thing barb move dead Steve Steve and I have something to tell you take a look this was in my tuna right a magnetic force field Oh what an inner of static electricity is surrounding the entire area that's why our powers did hmm now we're not going anywhere tonight truck can the G prefer not electrically yeah what would cause a thing like that God hates us it's a very powerful magnetic source somewhere nearby oh it's reversing all positive electrical power you sly boots at the wildin how close is the satellite compartment who cares though maybe three miles just thinking is it possible that the compartment could be bombarded with electron particles it could be it's happened before some of the earlier snark finders her food missiles came back there they were pretty heavily magnetized but there's a modern range between us in the compartment Yallah doesn't seem to be any logic behind any of this here's something to complicate things even more I took these upside down the shot I took when Dave and I first got out there look at it closely no liquid hey remember I mentioned the strange mud yeah mm-hmm this was the last shot taken most of the mud has disappeared in the opening is larger mm-hmm yes I remember that when we took John out of the compartment but at the time it didn't seem important someone or something must have been there so a huge blood sucking alien but I didn't think it was important either I mean I will kill myself again no Steve Steve hey anyone remember Pringles there's an explanation and a good one for all of us elves it must be hold on I I guess there's not some other things that have occurred today or without precedent I'll just ignore me man are they're alive it should be dead something that's ever happened before well once but yeah the wind is back you never said a man so far into space there's so little food no air well we're all tired disappointed stupid under a terrible strain I feel good after this long the Cape is probably contacted the Pentagon just a matter of time what if they can't get through the magnetic force field works both ways okay so I'm wrong I'll in the morning when it'll have to hike down and meet them as a precautionary measure I suggest we all stay in this room tonight I'll lay on Sharon Dave and I'll take turns watching a car all right yeah you're taller than last year honey huh I'm saying condescend I'm sorry doctor I just can't hold it back anymore I have told man I wish there was something I could say I guess I just said that I'll listen if you like hmm you'll be a woman soon he's only in love okay yeah baby hell yeah ah you know my gown opens from the rear ah say him Julia he alone stood on the threshold of our future and he peed down his leg what happened to him today we may learn more than we've ever known we've learned not to send poleaxe into space oh maybe I should just listen there will be other Steve's we're gone good mama that is so Scott what is he dead look let's not make a federal case out of this you know the listening thing went over like a lead balloon scientists the more we learn the more we realize there is to life itself is the greatest miracle oh well we get him to the hospital tomorrow maybe we'll know well all by adenoids huh could you massage my front now I got my job there's three little ties in the back slips right off well I just needed to talk to somebody I've been a little down thanks a lot you need one of these huh well here comes the nutty part Susie wants more she wear twas brillig and the slithy Toves and all what the hell am I thinking Martha Graham put my sweater in the dryer sorry wait there's one last piece of carrot cake I'm gonna have it hey what did you put the blood beast out you Valley quiet you're hunting blood beast you're right whine chop no hmmmm who the patient has blown a gasket alright we're looking for an honest man - what put some pants on yes well that's his hind er Steve yep it's the dismount that always impales them one you March straight down from there mister there's nothing you can do unless you know where his face is another long scene in here should help must have taken the body whatever it is it works best provide soothing relief let's take him down you said he could stay up till New Year's and that means Christmas is over I forgot to tell him that Rhonda called well no god I slipped in his face yeah I get that a lot Oh oh I just blew all over the operating room Oh well welcome back to the land of the living mr. Steve what me Steve are he Steve help the table let's shoot him back into space and see what happens about hello hi anything though Oh Steve's name is Jan you're all right thank you I don't know I don't know I think so could I have an Eskimo Pie yeah where's dr. Weil I hadn't finished his head what happened suppose you tell us what happened Julie what happened dr. Weiman he's dead Thank You Julie you wait up staring it you don't think that I had anything to do with it yeah hey Kaz just confused as you are did you see anything was there anybody in the room with you and dr. Wyman I don't know I don't want to hear I don't know mister well last thing I remember I was headed for the delay my descent that gets didn't take hold when I finally released the drag chute it didn't hold hmm was too close to the ground mm you crashed okay we brought you here yeah you're so full of it don't remember I seem to be floating no warm blackness ah we gave you a pudding bath Oh head achy breaky head yeah have you seen it say mark I told him not to pick at that Joe did that thing pop you it's old pizza back he got a little nutty with a wood chisel you think I'm Steve don't you you away what's happening you don't understand thought you in debt and frankly we're getting pretty used to the idea yeah we sold off your organs what do you mean dad don't yell at us when we pulled out of the compartment your body had completely ceased to function what do you mean compartment well a hypometabolism now known type of suspended animation no no no you were dead put on by the contraction of the mesentery blood vessels it sincere change of landing Oh terminology I expected from dr. Weil enough from you you wash your mouth out with soap well it seemed like the natural diagnosis I'm dr. Wyman yes in some way I think dr. Wyman is influencing me I think he may be a part of me now can you be dead again oh I don't really think they understand you've got that it's unbelievable things like this just don't happen this is so big mmm thank you really thank you I'm not afraid I'm not afraid fraid not Am I it didn't come here to destroy Johnny try to tell us what didn't come here to destroy us no more questions more boobies ooh well this one's not as nice they're gone my bronies are gone I've got a bassoon if we need one are you talking about come see for yourself your big dumb dead guy sit down normal in every respect four hours ago was populated with alien amorphic cell structures they mean to win Wimbledon I think we should see what I look like under the fluoroscope yeah that'll kill some time he shoot out man Holly work for the power out operates on iridium cathode tube oh wow he's loaded with shrimp the amorphic cell structures have expanded to Jacksonville body for breeding huh you're not gonna harm him I am what do you mean we don't even know what they are the one thing we do know is that they're alien to the human body young man somehow they must have come down with you in the compartment you gross two hours ago they were microscopic we've got to do something if you destroy them they destroy me Steve's don't preach I'm in trouble deep you know what I think I get hush puppies and coleslaw with ease you can't destroy them I'll take care of them why not that's why not creamer Barney's been in a fire I love you you burned me there's no way to meet the in-laws oh boy you know you marry the whole family not the copier my resume was in there Hey look I'm really sorry I thought Johnny told you I was dropping by oh boy you can't stop me from seeing my children come back here you farming you stupid wall stupid wall come here you little [ __ ] when I think of the blood bees hands all over you I got away didn't this I'm saying go very far it's gone it was burned pretty bad I think we gotta track it down and make sure it's dead no let's wait for help we can't possibly come back that thing by ourselves look nobody has gotten to us no one probably will until it's destroyed hmm why does it have to be killed don't you think he's cute why are we always so quick to destroy it it's an alien it's the first of its kind of come to the earth John you know what it's done to your breathing its healing your body you saw what it did to dr. Wyman isn't that reason enough it has to be killed I don't understand it didn't come in malice hmm it could have killed all of you earlier but it was me it was after I've loved every minute of it good nourish its young that's weird Steve more reason to destroy it suppose it is still alive rulers don't harm it it got it handled Steve fire seems to love a very pistol has engulfed in flame plus a delayed explosion there's better than a lit very pistol it's flaring on the short range it'll chop down anything there's some in the cabinet the hall I'll get new day you can't listen you can't kill a living creature without giving the chance to justify salut oh sorry hormones put him in there oh yeah grandma's old room well I'll try to raise them as if they're my very own shrimp uh yeah just lay him on the ironing board so Julie guess he wasn't getting enough at home huh Julie can give him something to keep him quiet sodium amytal good or you just turn on cartoons lady ahead of watch him Donald come with us with a meet photographic coverage this is going right in my eye all right really keep him out till we get back I don't know under normal circumstances this should render him unconscious for at least 12 hours this isn't a normal person this is no ordinary Steve what you and he were to each other has no bearing on what he is now actually it was pretty lukewarm I'm not worried he's not dangerous not to me anyway except when the Packers lose boom oh it can't take any chances that creature Lou Johnson comes back here look at him trying to shoot up he gives you a bad time but it out he's a very pistol believe me Julie he's not the same man you were engaged to yours Frankenberry pistol Thanks let me have one for Julie woo mmm there you go that'll do you're right I don't worry we weren't any trouble we're not gonna be heroes well whose role is the lamb aback and blow my head off just be back as soon as you can nope hmm god this feels great in my hand I've got to kill something don't make any sudden moves honeybunch Steve I need to iron a blouse could you sleep somewhere else you always really not showing that much well I can't find the blood beast but I see the Beast of Yucca Flats they got this boss a lot healthier than I am you know I I think it's leading us back to the compartment now you're a beauty looks that way how long do you think we've been out well Tom came out last year and then Steve was connected my watch is running again hmm mine's not your femme by 2 that means that magnetic field must be broken it must be dead so what are we all looking at I better make certain if we throw a shower for Steve can there be egg salad look a Lupin ah blood beats is doing his laundry see uh-huh George said if I ever got in trouble to come back here to the place by the creek cliff has Billy Idol hair lobby's plug least buddy wait imagine how much lower we'd be if we were down there oh wow are we camping this is camping you guys you know I never went camping one time we had to North Dakota and I was little to visit uncle Ron he had a horse and it stepped on me I think it was a horse um if we do have a shower we could probably get stuff that's green or yellow cuz even if there are boys or growth they can still use them and you don't if aliens even have sex I don't think they have it because I'll see it like most likely place for to go yeah I don't see anything maybe Tony inside yeah hmm I mean you stay here to what sure it's safe Dave you circles are left now go to the right okay maybe I should captain the purple blouse stayed on a stale air completely alone that'll that's best huh I had a naughty thought you know a blog bees can outrun a quarter horse for the first 50 yards maybe if they had a bloodhound I got skunked on blood bees but it's a great day to be out the woods I'm out there which what about this film the music's great whoo the blood beast is making jerk chicken hmm nothing could possibly live through that and we know for sure it's in there [ __ ] stop again don't stay there stay all along sure you can use it Sigmund the sea monsters got me live if he's not in there Mannix double Mannix our plan is going perfectly hey mister little help we have our woman back a good place to get lucky under there Oh baby I was once named I'm really the love beast it's got a killer pirate head you think I'm oh I see I regret nothing hurt no thanks I just was I could have killed me it didn't Holly what have we hadn't chased it off I don't wanna up like wyman you'll women we better get back Julie don't alone on the must I'm a trying contact according again yeah let's go Jeannie gotta a gun well we'll be in show and I can see every contour I gotta make it go away and have less grandma and please don't let the alien babies eat me in my sleep thank you howdy ma'am don't be afraid Julie it's one of those guns that says bang it's just the way my pants fit that was meant for you that was for the creature or whatever it is you can call him the creature it doesn't offend him don't stare at my jolly and don't look at my area I'm sorry John I'm sorry that you look like Andrew McCarthy if what you say is true what I've been dead will I still get calls from Citibank I don't know what this means for us but I haven't changed it my feeling I need sexual healing Julie we're all afraid of the unknown you don't understand what's happened to me and because there's an unknown being you want to destroy them B but isn't it possible that what's taking place is for a purpose logical positive is why not thought the creature have a chance to tell us why it's here but it broke in and attacked it kills after one and it's done this to you he shrimp tieu you had to do see now the others have gone to make sure it's dead it's not dead and they won't be able to find it hmm how do you know and stuff Julie I'm the one who's had the most contact with no dad something foreign is inside me a lot until the scheme if there was any cause for fear wouldn't I know it I'm not afraid this creature is intelligent it wants something he said we've got to give it a chance to communicate this here's your Count Chocula pistol did you nibble at your neck like I used to did he know all the little things you like oh god I don't want to hear it whoa somebody lose a toenail what Donna omitted for clarity we're sending you to stay with relatives until this whole thing blows over see the senator didn't work my bottle the reactions aren't those of a normal person i'ma tell happen to the creature got away then it's alive told me it would be somehow he knew he's a witch she seemed so sure that it's not evil this isn't a battle between men and anon reasoning being can't you see it doesn't want to kill for the sake of killing hmm it could've done away with all of us earlier I wanted to until we discovered it's fear of fire listen happy David years ago he was checking the power lines last night all you had with you was a pistol which you fired at it with no effect see if it had been a wild animal it would've tried to kill you before moving on moon come for what happened to dr. Wyman he fell against the coffee table no I can't but maybe it could if we give it a chance why should we give it a chance sorry it's already committed murder it's done I I don't know what to you when it's attacked Donna hmm look if you run a strange place and you were trying to communicate with the inhabitants but every time you tried they made a move against you the only way to break through to them will be to take a hostage can't you see that's what it's been doing it's been acting out of fear and self-preservation it wants to communicate with us but it it doesn't know how we've got to give it a chance what are you having mind I'll sleep over the creature keeps coming back to me because part of it is inside Marvin was inside you yeah why not let me lead us to it in the daylight in the open mmm-hmm Abby's got something yeah see my keys but we were out searching for the creature our Watchers started running again oh boy then when we encountered they stuff on our way back here they became active it and now everything's dead look you're the only one interested in this Steve my guess at the magnetic disturbance originated from two different locations ooh well one from the creature one more for the road and that from you it might be the only thing that's keeping you alive verbal life is keeping him alive if my life has been given back to me it's for a purpose trust me mm-hmm and you'll learn why if the creature isn't would you believe it to be and we're forced to kill it then we have no indication of what will happen to you I know let's review what are we talking about right import other creature make itself known before we take any action all right but if we follow Johnny's plan we still have to be prepared we've no way of knowing what can happen to us I felt it King remember we've agreed to give the creature every opportunity to prove itself in the morning we still agree to follow Johnny's plan get an early start by that time maybe help will arrive name knild stand guard arrest if you get as much sleep as you can will it come back here tonight well we didn't have a date but he stops by most evenings I don't how okay and the plan is so why a trapeze I know I'm gonna go get a live well for my babies this is better than Junior oh that was very nice yes it was yeah now crow if we just do the blessing furrow must have slipped out during the him what'd I tell you he'd been on me since I walked through the door a bounder I'd turn him into a system it wasn't dinner hey Satan past potatoes oh and cut my meat for me will you and I must have thrown up 24 times in the car alone yeah anyway that's how I got neutered you want to see the scar no no no that's all right well I suppose I gotta get this thing rolling all right before we begin why don't we go around the table and each give a little thanks to God no offense II don't take it alrighty then lord I'd like to thank you for my health the occasional good massage oh and my son I guess lord please accept him though you have seen fit to smite him failures thank you mother me I'm thankful for my mom my evilness my pending world domination thank you oh and my friends will be leaving immediately after the meal well personally I'm just thankful no one discovered let's just say keep away from the chickpeas Oh bless us our Lord these might gifts for we are about to recede over and out stuffing instead of potatoes what do you got Satan oh well I guess I'm most thankful for my new clients the cast of friends and special thanks to Mike Ovitz for finally throwing in with me and most of all Pat Buchanan I guess I'm most thankful for the spirit of music you shot oh yeah you tell them honey okay listen up everybody okay okay I have another announcement me and mr. B natural and myself are going to be engaged isn't that right honey okay and uh one more thing I'm gonna go off I'll Drive the bus yeah if you know what I mean okay I move we skip to the meal I second what the hell are we waiting for let's eat Seattle Chester baby position is for the floor routine Oh anyway I trusted that Eagle Scout and he let me down naughty what is it Steve were worried about Johnny's plan so hard to trust a guy not named Steve Huff is responsible for his actions and he's putting on too much weight I think it might be a trap what is this time I've ever prepared come on I think Johnny's lying about the babies and just wants the alien to marry him mmm bread and butter pickles how about a Molotov cocktail that's pretty early I mean we can look at gasoline and then use it as a hangar that's a ticket here knew we could saturate the creature I'm dead knighted with a very pistol there's no way could escape that yeah nothing can live through that so what do you think hmm how many bombs are we gonna make on between us we ought to be able to carry about six oh my god you are mad what are gonna be with the girls are you thinking with it but I'm leaving them here unprotected I can carry three that's enough are we gonna tell Julie and Donna about this I think we better make sure Johnny doesn't find out huh let's keep it between us Steve's here Gina Dee's worked before king oscar fish balls yeah water canal you bought a Conejo bail Assange was running wild behind our lines you know we couldn't do any much damage with our rifles or playing kind of a cat-and-mouse game they know he could finish us off God you paint a picture not far from where we were there was a truck overturned left candidate saw what was happening hmm got the brilliant idea to bring me some gasoline and made up some of these and all the guys really liked him that tank came by we smeared it but good anyway what was your question pretty horrible to see it works then there was a year I fainted before the talent contest be good for me to get off of this mountain mm-hmm with these cocktails I'm not anxious to tangle with that creature again a lot of us are don't think we have any choice came down the satellite it's our responsibility besides further stockett and have a come after us yeah that's my dating policy probably right so I wish you could wait for some help I just don't like the idea of taking Julie and Donna with us well I don't either mm-hmm then we don't know what help will arrive we can't leave them alone yeah live without him I don't think dr. Wyman's gonna need the chin-up bar so nASA has one fully equipped hospital room tough geez look at this clown come on hey weirdo hey freak all the shrimps weirdo boy what are you doing with dr. Wyman's body Hey I'm not into the athlete I had to see how he is killed mmm Happy's a head goal its horror I don't expect you to trust me I don't even know that I can trust myself Johnny honey Oh like a monster I haven't done anything wrong Johnny's not a question of right or wrong if you're not responsible for your actions whether you are or not who knows what you might do you're a woman in love John would you do realizes unknown creature is using your body as a breeding ground we don't know what to expect he didn't use me I gave of myself freely I can't deny anything you've said but you're a big fat liar I do receive impulses from the creature but I know I have for you well I I can still have a career I know I can still make my own decisions was it your own free will or the creatures mm phonemic mm-hmm I'm sorry I was thinking about the nursery what I'm not sure but I do know that we have to give it a chance to explain what I know they lying I'll be in the car Hale I will be here in about three hours gotta get some rest especially you young lady you got a big day tomorrow yeah well stay here for a while work on my wedding dress I'll get the bags this guy is way over the edge all right you will give it a chance to explain ya won't get a chance yeah kablooie okay once twice three times a blood beast and the blood bees got mad and spun [ __ ] ease on the lawn hey bees honey he was still going bowling what got there mrs. Butterworth's the blood beast has been drinking and before our wedding night ah this is where the movie really swings at I hide here we go oh nice shot if we could just clip well there's something in the way I can't figure out what it is oh sorry guys I parked my Camaro here somewhere I don't know it's a beautiful day for a wedding but why are they meeting the priest out here okay brides side of blood beachside creature isn't far away hmm there are some hills for the north at a cave I'm seeing the color orange and someone is thinking of the number 12 I've never been in the area before how did you know that it came refused to answer that by the way anybody lock up the space building I'm seeing a wall pantsuit and someone is hungry for a frosted item ie if the name says Gorman there's gonna be walking yep on there's rock with a big hill no no you must learn how to walk Hobbs come on with the knees liveth unbuttoned a there hit rock ride well this is the spot where blood beast first told me like me carry me up carry me carry me we have to flap our wings and fly from here no I haven't picked up any impulses for about an hour now well maybe they weren't really impulses and perhaps there were just notions whoa more under cupping yep I see it under cupping everyone I have an impulse to wander like we're lost Oh blood beast scat careful maybe he was just picking up a CB radio well we could just go to Midvale Mini Putt I'm supposed to meet him there tonight hmm on my pants I'll pull both my pants hmm it's in there what Oh Julie Donna go check that out you stay there there's nothing to fear I got you gay and necessary chances the girls will wait here okay you lead the way you're gonna give it a chance you're not gonna kill it you're not going to count why did you let him go stop it he thinks he's Ida Lupino again he's all wait doubt blood sweetie they're gonna kill you I welcome to you hmm they don't understand I'm not sure I do how did I help you to communicate a week.i assimilation form of photosynthesis has been able to incorporate certain of dr. Wyman's functional processes he turned out to be very boring dr. Wyman's death necessary who is sacrifice I can communicate understand your reasoning the motivations your way of life sweetheart I will need your help together we must make them understand that I have not harmed you and we will give them a better way of life maybe not today or tomorrow but soon and for the rest of your life but anyway now I'm hiding in here cuz the dogs keep burying me and digging me up so anyway then I transferred to junior college they had better space like program over there look here comes the bride oh please butter happy a braid I'm not I just want to kill you far away let's move in uh in our country it's custom to throw gasoline on the new couple yeah Oh ceremony's about to begin I love weddings my nails aren't dry I'd be afraid that's dr. Wyner [ __ ] is this boy oh yes I am using dr. Weiman boys I've got a little problem with the reverb though I'm also using his car in his apartment in town I've been able to imagine the use of any of this faculty his voice I am able to give in an egg with you yes you can ah not dead he's gained nothing more than life you know it he's the first of your kind to attain immortality immortality ruff wait I mean dad interested in that kind of immortality I know you want to destroy me please listen I only want to help you years ago my secret habit of the penetrated orally we discovered the ultimate power radar just a human her they're about to do ready to make your move we gonna put this power to our own benefit instead hatred greed and Prejudice caused us use that power it brought about our own destruction who Kentucky now's our chance but you can't risk killing Johnny no wait that harm is bad hearing them out waiting for me to penetrate your Atmos very correctly Oh before we're not retractable he's hardly they fell back toriel i am a birdie cub death and destruction what you say is true what are we to expect don't need me you need me throw me we will unite our intellect within one body say how do you plan to do that already it is begun scram within the hour the first of our new generation will be born it's proof I'm dilated to four I can feel it inside get the cocktail sauce I'm sorry pausing your worlds no no honey not now sacrificing archeology this resurrection of your own in the car honey you've been a beautiful fool really we even be safe from your downfall is by our sacrifice what you proposes darling salvation my dear go ahead and tell me mmm lordy said I'm dead dead man with a brain and a body kept alive artificially to feed our generation of monsters that's not true yes hmm you don't kill me man you civilization is inside of me Oh tiny civilization enjoy mankind as we know today the future of our races in you they wrote their own vows you know yeah it's beautiful got to kill me we have to destroy it you can do god Ron get away from it oh it's Operation Rescue we have a greater be killed you do is to call generations don't tell me you'll be dopes your only hope from a time you proved you let me go ha that's how it began I'm having not enough time I'm gonna do everything myself oh boy ha ha ha you can't throw jars of rice my corduroys please you're the bike he hates that rock ah save your own damn planet man hey st. Louis parents mascot was burned to death today rip you know same you can you won't end up on satellites mites and we will be there way down in the meantime I'll just roast that it smells like chicken I wanted to be in Pond here I come - Oh a hold of a wet blood Beast now these Lutheran weddings are so short should we split Jenny open and scoop out the row dally I think we made the right decision well there's good arguments on both sides dawn made the decision hmm let's hope it was the right one we probably never know yep just what it is we'll never know we'll never know should we get Johnny or not my shrimp where you work or play okay so what was the point again I don't how did it okay sparkles what kind of pie do you want mincemeat or pumpkin mincemeat Michel mince meat Oh our studies show Mike that there is no meat in this so-called meat filled pie servo cam but if you please I am mincemeat I invade your Inland Waterways choking off marine life I move silently attaching myself to pleasure craft I am mince meat I am visited upon you I hide in the curtains and I sleep in your hat and I take on the dream to the ones that have slept there and nobody takes anything small into a bar out here I got yo powerful theater isn't it deceiver oh no look something's happening on a deep search feeling yeah oh my gosh what's happened whether this is your doing isn't so now Clayton mother well I saw that you are really so very unhappy and I remembered how that old recipe of mine always brought a smile to your face Oh turkey surprise up turkey at 200 degrees for one hour let's stand then rub it with a turtle mother well it's clear that you can't function without me here I'll be staying mother forever mother anyway that's how I got into the business hey hey hello there they are the ravishing mother Forrester and the delightful man about madness dr. Clayton Forrester Oh may I say very sincerely that I think Thanksgiving is the most delightful holiday of all because we get to say thank you and so thank you pearl thank you thank you dr. Forrester and and thank you everyone happy Thanksgiving happy Thanksgiving mother would you like to kill him or Shaw you go right ahead wanted animal that large isn't good
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Channel: fenixdown22
Views: 412,045
Rating: 4.7966509 out of 5
Keywords: mst3k, mystery, science, theater, 3000, night, blood, beast
Id: 7_9KAxuOgKM
Channel Id: undefined
Length: 90min 45sec (5445 seconds)
Published: Sat Jul 06 2013
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