Most Illogical Things Parents Do

what is the most illogical thing your parent s do i'll start nsw my mom spent over four grand on living room furniture couch love seat two leather recliners and she will not allow anyone even her own children and grandchildren to sit on them whenever i'd invite people over everyone awkwardly stands around or sits on the floor anyone saying four grand is not very much for a living room seth so i called my mom to confirm a price she said she spent two grand alone on the recliners almost one thousand dollars each and another four for the suede and leather sofa love seat combo my bad my mom used to be that way with our carpets buy new carpet put crappy plastic mats down to protect it fun part was vacuuming which meant i had to pick them up and vacuum underneath they had tiny plastic teeth to grip the carpet it was always fun to put them upside down and watch the carnage floor was lava my mother puts a cover on basically everything she puts a sheet over her car in the garage at night so it doesn't get dusty she had me install plywood on top of a five dollar garage sale table to protect the table surface and now she puts placemats on top of the plywood to protect the plywood and coasters have to go on the place map to protect the placemats she got sick of my dad's be a mug dripping condensation so she folds up a paper towel and puts it on the bottom and puts a ziploc bag around that with a rubber band it all drives me up the wall my mom will put something in the microwave and set the timer for double the time it needs to be in for and then tell me to take it out when it's been in for half the time i set it for like why not just set it for the amount of time it actually needs to be cooked for so you don't have to sit there and babysit it when i asked her why she does this she got super p at me my mom confiscated my toothbrush once because she was angry at me for comparing my grades to hers when she was in high school i kid you not my mom makes a full pot of coffee in the morning then fills about six cups and puts them all over the house so she doesn't have to carry her coffee from room to room she really seems to enjoy cold coffee we never had a blender in the house i always assumed that they were very expensive and that was why so i made my milkshakes in a bowl with a spoon up until i was about 17 when i realized that you could get one for like 20 bucks i told my mom feeling so excited because clearly she did not know that they were cheap her response a strong and unprovoked i don't want one of those in my house my husband and i are still scratching our heads over that one he at the time just my bf of course later gave me one which i had to hide that is both ridiculous and funny i'm sad cracking up over the idea of you running some kind of illicit milkshake lab from your bedroom one time i came home from school when i was in elementary school and my mother had spray painted my dog's tail black it was white her explanation was she wanted to see how it looked i guess it didn't seem that weird at the time but she was probably high as frick nothing sick like the other posts on here but a bunch of funny illogical quirky things come to mind about my mom the kitchen light must remain off after 7pm unless she is not home or a guest arrives then it can remain on indefinitely the dryer cannot be used at night even if it gets dark early in the winter when she has to go to bed early she sleeps in the living room and no one in the entire house can make much noise the heat is to be turned down very low at night and similarly no fans or ac can be used in the summer overnight you are not allowed to get up before her unless you have some specific reason to get up early in addition to above most computer video game and other electronic things must be off and unplugged overnight air conditioners when absolutely necessary have to be on specific outlets in the house in case of overload tl dr my mom is afraid of the house going on fire to an obsessive amount it's not my parent i know i know but bear with me it's the freaking golden goose egg of fricked up habits whenever my friend had his kids over his mother would make them inform her every time they had taken a dump before flushing it she would then proceed to inspect it and determine whether or not it was small enough to flush without clogging if she decided it wasn't she had still has i saw it a kitchen butter knife designated for chopping up the crap before flashing it goes bad crap insane if they flush without a having checked goes bad crap insane for a lot of things actually i don't think it's possible to top that without getting a prison sentence one time there was a steam leak at a nuclear power plant about 200 kilometers from my hometown turned out nothing serious no danger of radiation leak or whatever however rumors got out and panic ensued in fact the incident led to several fatalities people literally drank themselves to death on iodine because it is said to protect from radiation poisoning and other crap well on that i refused to drink the iodine solution thankfully but my mom refused to let me go out she pointed to the clouds in the sky and told me they were not clouds they were in fact the radiation name checks out this is how my mother woke me up for school rachel i'm going to wake you up in an hour rachel i'm going to wake you up in 45 minutes rachel i'm going to wake you up in half an hour rachel i'm going to wake you up in 20 minutes rachel i'm going to wake you up in 10 minutes rachel i'm going to wake you up in five minutes rachel i'm going to wake you up in one minute rachel time to wake up finally one day i snapped and there was much swearing when i told my mom that i was moving out she responded said i wasn't allowed because it's her house and her rules i'll be 21 soon my dad once said to me you're not moving out while you live under my roof if i spend more than two hours out of the house she accuses me of hating the rest of the family never being there for the family and that i want to move out due to all of this i legitimately want to move out now she also calls several times in a row and then calls back immediately after we finish a conversation on the phone her plan is working my family loved road trips when i was younger but being in a car for so long used to drive me and my siblings crazy we fight and argue in the back seat as punishment my parents would blast loud latino music through the stereo until we stopped fighting and would continue to blast loud latino music for a long time depriving anyone of sleep in hindsight it was pretty logical because it would stop us from fighting but my parents are little asian people and don't speak spanish other drivers must have been confused as they saw a minivan driven by cranky asian people speeding down the road with loud spanish music blasting at top volume my mom stays awake until i get home and she has to hear from me before she goes to bed if i go to a concert and get home at 5 00 am she's still up problem is i'm 27 and have lived on my own for about six years if she knows i'm out somewhere she wants me to call when i get home sometimes she will call just to make sure i'm home if she hears an ambulance go by her house keep in mind we live in different cities one time i had a chick over at my place we had been drinking and doing the nasty all night long and i turned my phone on silent so there'd be no interruptions during the coatus after the lovemaking was finished we both passed out and fell asleep at about 4am i hear the doorbell ringing but it's the ringing where someone just keeps pressing it over and over while pounding on the door i wake up confused and still drunk and i think i'm either about to be murdered or something terrible has happened i go to the door and it's my mom grandmother and sister at my front door crying and screaming asking me why i hadn't been answering the phone they had called over 70 times and assumed i was dead and drove to my house i'm glad my mom cares about me but it's pretty freaking ridiculous ro time to lay some serious ground rules my mom will drive the longest way to get anywhere in the city and her car is far from gas efficient she will drive from our house to my grands house before going anywhere else even if it means going the complete opposite direction she does this so often i have taken to driving her in my car whenever we go anywhere together because i cannot stand it any longer she will also yell my name throughout the house until i give up answering her and just find her but when i do this to her she gets extremely angry and says that she hates having her name yelled and that i should just find her if i want to talk to her drives me insane another thing i tried to push this behavior of my mum's as far out of my mind as possible because it makes me gag but she seems to forget which toothbrush is hers she then decides to use whichever one she thinks could be hers which typically ends up being mine recently i have been hiding mine to ensure this doesn't happen it is so gross to go to use your toothbrush and realize it's wet or has been recently used by someone other than yourself my mom yells at me from the other side of the house but when i yell back which i hate doing she can't hear me so i'm essentially forced to go find her whenever she wants to talk to me instead of the other way around my mother-in-law is a gold mine for this sort of thing she will buy expensive food then get upset if you eat it because it costs so much money then get upset when it goes off because you didn't eat it she hangs wet clothes on clothes hangers and then on the washing line she will clean the bathroom at 5am then get upset whenever someone uses it for the rest of the day because they're making a mess i'm sure i can find out more if you're interested my mother never allowed me to visit a friend's house unless she was there this carried on until i was 16 she was afraid i'd be physically shamed abused somehow and didn't know how to defend myself or know the warning signs she told me this a few months ago when i confronted her about it she's used vicks vaporub as an agent to heal bruises she genuinely believed that i had to tell her it did nothing when i was nine i'm not sure she knows it does nothing even to this day she made me keep my hair in pigtails every day in school she was convinced this would make my hair thicker and healthier so as to last longer into my old age or at least that's what she told me my family is pakistani i moved out with my boyfriend who is white she is convinced he will divorce me because she believes divorces are customary in american culture and nothing will become of our relationship i could go on lol moment i read the pigtails thing i knew this was a desi mom my girlfriend's parents let her go to her college halfway across the country but when she's home they don't let her stay out past 11 p.m she's 19. same with my girlfriend's parents she's 23. my mom i had a terrible relationship with my parents they never supported my own goals and made me study what they thought would be the most responsible choice for a good job later on in life because they never supported me i want you to do this study that will guarantee you a good job in a boring field later on in life even though you really want to follow your dream which is a bad idea my parents pluralize words that shouldn't be spaghetti's subways the sandwich place price clubs it gets really infuriating i'm from long island no one in my family is from michigan [Music] dude shudder my grandmother told me once i couldn't play with the one black kid in my elementary school because i had different diseases don't touch the african boy timmy he'll give you aids people are dirty lying bastards my mother is a compulsive hoarder always has been we have piles up to the ceiling in some areas and entire rooms are filled to the top with random stuff my father does not agree and it has been putting stress on their marriage but lately he's been less motivated but he's giving up because he doesn't want her to leave him child services were called at one point by a neighbor but my parents convinced them that the mess is only temporary since the house is being remodeled and they don't have time to clean the remodel started a year before i was born i have tried countless times to help her get rid of all of the crap but she won't listen to reason thankfully i'll be turning 18 this spring this is also just the tip of the iceberg let me know if you want to hear about the other two houses three storage units multiple pets and other drama do tell every time my mom wants to change webpages she closes the entire browser and starts again on her homepage i've tried explaining she doesn't need to do that but she doesn't care she's not even that old she worked at apple infuriating insert random apple joke here when company visits they must sit on the coffee table or just stand because the only couch in the living room has springs that poke up through the cushions and jab you in the ass it's an 80 year old couch that belonged to my father's grandmother he refuses to throw it out or to have it reinforced i think the assassin springs are a blood offering in her memory my parents refuse to use the dishwasher they believe washing dishes builds character they're from freaking calvin and hobbes i kid you not they also think it saves water even though the entire time my mom washes the dishes the sink is running i found out my parents had a stash of paper plates and spoons they only use when i'm not home so i could wash the dishes my mom is remarrying her abusive first husband from 30 years ago who we have confirmed is still abusive she never told me about this and he seemed decent enough when i first met him but i went and caught up with some of my aunts who gave me the real story from how he was when they were married the first time now his current wife is leaving him because she's afraid of him and my mother knows this he was nice enough for two times i met him but this is just so goddamn illogical since she's been single for the past 12 years not to mention his divorce from his most recent wife was just finalized the week before he proposed to my mom and they only reconnected less than a year ago via facebook god i freaking hate facebook she's lonely bro get her a kitten asap or a big butt dog that bites abusive ex-husbands my mom enjoys writing things down no matter the situation say we're standing right next to each other and she needs me to do the dishes she'll search extensively for a pen and a piece of paper and write the exact words she just said and hand me the paper if she also hates wasting energy but she'll turn on a computer and the radio then proceed to go to her room and turn on the tv while reading a book my mom is convinced that any video game system will ruin the screen of any tv i explained to her it was a plasma issue and that video game systems and tvs have timer so she decided to ask a 50 year old acquaintance he said video game systems are bad for tvs i haven't had a video game system for five years my mother goes 55 in a 65 mile per hour zone and she randomly breaks every 15 featuring she's driven me one since i got my license at 16 when i was 21 and she was taking me to the airport because i was moving 2 000 miles away even though i know i wouldn't see my mom again i dang near ripped her eyes out on that 20 minutes trip to the airport stop randomly breaking people hate you my parents have a hd tv in one room connected to a non-hd satellite receiver and a non-hd tv connected to a hd satellite receiver in another room but because i'm the youngest i must not know what i'm talking about my dad likes to purposefully embarrass me in front of my friends all through grade school i would wait for him to pick me up outside the school with my friends without a veil every time i would go to reach for the car door he would slightly accelerate and then pee himself laughing as i awkwardly played his game of cat and mouse chasing the car embarrassingly down the street when i finally got in the car my friends would be pointing and laughing along with random strangers on the sidewalk thanks for the public humiliation dad oh and if i'm ever visiting and need a ride home that is from the bar the game continues the most recent one that springs to mind me and my roommates all 25 use my parents netflix on my ps3 out of the blue we can't watch anything above pg minus 13 rating due to parental controls call my dad to find out what's going on and apparently my mom was concerned that my sister might watch or was watching not sure r-rated material my sister is 23 not to mention she knows how to torrent logged into their account and changed it back don't think she's noticed wow this one is crazy god forbid she see a nudity scene her innocent eyes might be corrupted they can't read directions especially with computer electronic equipment and expect me to do it for them i used to just do it quickly because i'm adept at figuring things out without directions now i just open up the directions point to what i'm reading and show them that it really is that easy now they don't ask me anymore and refuse to read the directions themselves so i hear them pouting out loud when they get a new ipad and iphone they pout for hours literally when it will take a few minutes even for those that are computer illiterate to read the directions with pictures to figure things out bleh update my mother bought an ipad a book that is well over 140 pages long at least she's trying and she's doing it independently i was really surprised it's really not like my parents to try and learn about technology on their own i wasn't asked one question and didn't suggest a thing as an i.t person i can tell you there are people who get paid very good money to deal with these people the job is less technical knowledge and more patience i have a small list of random crap my parents do that makes made no sense if i don't load the dishwasher right my dad will flip out and won't stop until it is loaded perfectly mom is a hoarder and she has convinced me and my brother have more stuff than her we have not even a one stroke four of what she has but she keeps buying more stuff mother buys food a bunch of frozen crap and canned food then complains about what we eat there is literally nothing but frozen pizzas and canned food mom complains shin dead but continues to buy junk at yard sales and stores but when my younger brother asks for twenty dollars to go to the movies it's like asking a hobo to buy you a house and that hobo is batshit crazy mom makes me apply for jobs at the age of 16 during summer but then turns around and says i'll get divorced if i work this kept repeating for months until school came around my favorite mum stores all the toilet paper on the other side of our house from the bathroom on a shelf she is convinced that if she keeps it away we'll use less but when she runs out suddenly it's our fault we use too much my dad got gas for the truck next day i'm with him again and he gets gas again i ask him didn't you just get gas yesterday yay did i never fill it up i start giggling and he continues you fill up your car every time you get gas well i do dad i figure i'll use the gas anyway and it'll save me a trip he laughs if i did that it would cost me 80 bucks every time my face i love my dad but i already know he's too dang stubborn for me to explain the fallacy in his logic my mother yelled at me for going to a bar in the middle of town because you'll get shot and only lowlifes and criminals go there she has never been to this bar i am 21 the bar is in the dead center of our suburban 95 white i'm clarifying so she isn't even being xenophobic though she has before middle-class town the place is actually quite nice and full of locals i see daily she also constantly gives me crap for not having a job while she is unemployed with two kids i do work on multiple film tv shoots and work on my friend's website while still being a full-time college student i need to move out i know that feel man people don't understand that film tv digital media is structured radically differently compared to most jobs or careers just because you're not at an office or store doesn't mean you're not doing work i get crap all the time my mom goes to an auction near our house every thursday tuesday and saturday to buy other people's old crap she doesn't want and sell it on ebay she's convinced it'll end up making her a fortune and then she can open a thrift store the fun thing is she uses child support and money we need for food and power to buy stuff and she almost never sells anything she ends up paying them to take things whenever she does because she refuses to charge for shipping and buys a ton of huge crap to sell she also refuses to spend more than 25 on a single thing because obviously buying 10 things at a few dollars each and selling them for a loss of profit is more profitable than buying one thing for 50 and selling it for a small profit i think she really just likes to have more things to look up on ebay when she gets home but today she dropped out of bidding on a fishing rod of thirty dollars when she got home to look it up the lowest priced one on ebay was three thousand dollars whenever she can't find something on ebay no matter how much it's worth she refuses to look it up anywhere else and just assumes it isn't worth anything and puts it on for a few dollars and if she gets a drawing or painting or anything like that she has to find out of it's an original or not right her method of figuring that out erase it seriously this painting might be worth five thousand dollars better erase part of it to make sure it's the real thing unfortunately she's only spent her money on fake knock-offs so far so it hasn't been a problem though i really wouldn't have a problem with this it's something she enjoys and has fun with if she would be smart enough about it to not spend so much on worthless crap she thinks will sell for a fortune that we can't even afford to buy food for the week before she gets more child support then she just throws it all away too and we have to wait for her disability to get here so we can eat again a few times she spent all her money there and the internet got cut off so she couldn't even check on ebay for her stuff that's selling and ended up having to take all of my money and borrow from a friend to get it turned back on this is the woman that has complete and total control over everything i do in my life but mother knows best it's called an intervention son and it's time that the people who love your mom have one if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye bye bye

Channel: On Tap Studios

Views: 30,418

Rating: 4.8991981 out of 5

Keywords: parents, parents stories, illogical things parents do, parenting, parenting styles, parenting 101, parenting hacks, parenting fails, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, sub, reddit cringe, memes, comment awards, dankify, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, reddit on tap

Id: jXmK0393H6A

Length: 24min 31sec (1471 seconds)

Published: Sat Sep 12 2020