moistcr1tikal Twitch Stream Dec 4th, 2018 [Just Cause 4]

how's it going Lauren [ __ ] how long does the waterfall quest take it depends on if you have anyone blocking for you if you don't could take a long time because you get killed by the Giants but it's not a long quest that was the first thing I did on my account as well took my attack and strength right 2:30 hello nuclear Oh baby I just remembered totally forgot to put the new badges there again well they'll have something to look forward to for the next one yeah the new just cuz I'm definitely gonna give this bad boy a whirl show us that [ __ ] today maybe another day but certainly not today I'm just diving right into this bad boy I played just cause for the story nothing else since I was thrown from Medici responsible for deposing half a dozen heads of state the black hands have encountered them before and son is Benito or he assassinated our employer residents not just cause it's just because as in because it's not because because don't give me that [ __ ] appreciate the reefed me on this men before commander Morales we're preparing a test can we cut to the chase appreciate the research are yes my Miguel Rodriguez you know I cannot youth that man then he's gonna be like a super humans yeah yes the key to immortality Cheetos my days been uneventful not much to report it's definitely cause not coz welcome aboard welcome aboard moist it kiss me mcus I really don't understand why you think that it's a game where it's all about just doing whatever the [ __ ] you want with some fun tools Justin because it's not about a just cause I wouldn't say then again knowing I pay every single one of these stories to resell brigands good seaman lots of questions hmm I'm glad I can help with your love life answers alone I have people who can help us here I've done this kind of thing before this is different I can handle some bad weather good afternoon umbrella if you would just listen to me up a plan is a list of things that go wrong I like to peel my leash or just be ready when I patch you into that console you'll have to find Espinoza quickly answers my questions we destroy partically up bill burr on the podcast I'll do my best I'll ask him next time I see him then he's always over beautiful moist nipple scar Espinosa better be ready to talk you know maybe this game is gonna be a little more intuitive with a controller I don't know I left shift would be zoom in instead of sprint what is sprint then oh it Otto's okay good started it looks like it like Otto Sprint's after a ch3 bill we'll never knew another podcast I don't know about that claim I'm [ __ ] feeling it now yeah this is gonna be a lot more in to see if there is a sprint there is not is Lord of Hill has his own podcast yeah yeah it does I'm well aware okay well if there's no sprint there's no point to this back to the keyboard and mouse you went to Conan's podcast which one is not exactly what I've blow an Internet theater he's an actual celebrity matey's follow your gonna come face to face with a black hat I keep hitting left shifters Parenti for heading up was there a wingsuit in this game not positive does not look like it easy the game is broke Lal had to refund it what do you mean what's broken about it outplayed I'm playing a lot of hitman so I've mastered stuff I appreciate the kind words sonic buckley hope things are going well for you man welcome aboard incognito guy Oh that'll be in my montage welcome aboard lal rasoi what do you mean the third one wasn't bright I didn't experience like any game breaking [ __ ] with the third one or the second or the first surprised let's get real [ __ ] what out here that sounds lovely with its if its final mouse man I don't doubt it that [ __ ] literally change the game they were the game they made the game they shifted the Cosmic Consciousness the world hasn't been the same since the release of the new final Mouse [Music] I've got this too easy this is the one thing they never prepared for very similar to the third one so far get me up there you lost the game I don't know what the [ __ ] just happened to me yeah before final Mouse there is nothing but losses now it's only hard dub skis thank God for final knows you have c4 yet said I could switch weapons holding our but there we go I don't have any other weapons that would do it this is wild height it's getting there welcome diamond Greco appreciate the resub Aslan if I could I wouldn't argue yes absolutely I forgot to use my Wolverine claws or whatever Oh big sneak attack the woman amen man I'll play that rectum radio a nice fat tune for you man appreciate it werewolf [Music] I mean this is quite literally exactly the same I'm sure there's a lot of new [ __ ] I hope too many games to play yeah a lot of come out recently heavens I welcome werewolf with 88 all right well let's at least have some [ __ ] fun with this thing oops I immediately blew that going back and there we go and then what do i press to make it like to go wild god appreciate the gift some best/worst gamers yeah I played Far Cry 5 rows and barium precedents I did not press to make it go I don't want to release the tethers I want to make it pull pressing R again I just launching another one Jesus how many can I press it once oh I did it he's unlikely he survived this long this is not holding ex releases than Yakuza sure let's see what project D up buckin do know that's kinda disappointing than for me that actually makes me rather upset I'm all for a game not changing its identity too much but if you're just gonna carbon copy the game without making any improvements you can keep the [ __ ] is the point in making another game just make a DLC appreciate the reset recovering it pulls automatically now that woman with Rico at the airport yes I do I think this doesn't even look like a real man looks like a claymation that face has had so much [ __ ] Botox yeah you know it it's new it's cool man that that's good J Mac I tell you if only this new game hadn't come out and be the first one in line to play the new way of war that's the [ __ ] truth this game looks bad what's exactly the same as the last one isn't necessarily a bad thing but I mean at least do some new stuff I guess I did not Katie I'll be totally honest I went to bed right after this dream and then I woke up at like 7 o'clock today cuz I had a lot I needed to get done appointments and [ __ ] appreciate the resub milky thanks for the 8 years of watching man Z I'm guessing I spend most of the game to get all those backs I'll need to make repairs No thank God got it no we're getting a branded moist mouse I probably wouldn't do that to you guys [ __ ] indeed Rico why pay for a game when you can play for free at i/o point not having my grappling hook is like missing a limb these are beautiful animals I can't wait to skin them I'm coming me too that looks like the police might be right yeah honestly I'd say murder minors Aaron if I'm giving you a real answer that war was truly more abominable even as a joke must not be afraid of heights I know you're not I'm not but I usually have a better suit huh here comes a little speed running rught check this [ __ ] out ah a game that's all about freedom uh well then is there no penalty it is just strongly advising me to return to the mission area if I don't do it it's you know it's totally within my right but the game would like if I did know I was wrong nights yeah no it's about expected appreciate the resub amp [ __ ] yeah man I played every Halo game genuinely every single one except halo 5 grappling hook is like missing a limb my favorite is halo 2 that looks like the place baby never seen anything like a upload before meter might be right no time to take the losers way around here Vita I'm at ellaby small first impressions of the game must not be afraid of heights just just cuz the ring excuse me Just Cause 3 because everyone cares about this story instead of all the [ __ ] fun things you can do welcome aboard jackster 1616 didn't even bother to upgrade the graphics it doesn't look like either yeah shoot what happened everything okay yeah fightin black hand chopper that's not good yeah played me Lord's and lovely Lois didn't get into the second one as much though oh that's the smallest cutest little dog right there goddamn good [ __ ] love small dogs Oh what is up with these babes Rico found a dog almost mean arleigh ramp with a skateboard and [ __ ] dope more exposition that's why I play oh man there's a little bug on my computer got it relatively speaking you look awful uh what black hand are casing the village that happen often why did you not play yellow five looked bad and the Xbox ones [ __ ] duals yes oh boy Mike Easler channel 19 project the app alone I agree I'm saying I was wrong you were right welcome Wyatt jr. [ __ ] ya agency anymore help me with these what do we do about yappa between the blizzards and those artillery towers I can't get close yeah buck up all the way ideas tell me wait listen appreciate the gifts of Todd welcome hopper I already played ant wars it was awful even as a bad mean horrible horrible experience to maintain order and justice in solis I've allowed this place to serve as a refuge for the criminal and the disenfranchised what a hero thanks a terrorist attack was launched against the project Dieppe our facility the culprit was abetted by conspirator from this village God that really just struck a chord with me like that was emotional now I know a little bit about her backstory now I care a little more [ __ ] man I tell you right a good character every citizens identity would be checked and all transgressions would be harshly just us three Just Cause 3 has better graphics i remember i remember i like the intro a lot more i don't even know why they're bothering to tell a story no one cares about it you killed my uncle I'm here for revenge at least you aren't a coward your father would be discussed with the monster you've become you to traitors can discuss your disappointment together in prison in order to my chopper I don't care about how it looks visually I just care that they're even bothering they've already proven they can't tell a good story with the last three games the reason the games were popular at all is because of the fun you could have with them just let me get to that I mean at the end of it didn't she say that these are criminals like murderers and [ __ ] is it really that sad all the flank goddamn outplayed of course thank you Clark Kent you know I'm not just kill her you just killed the man using that same grapple why did you only like knock her over why not to kill her with the grapple you just proved you can do that fair enough Rico also yeah why not just pull down the helicopter he literally just did that right before landing he genuinely just brought down a helicopter by grappling it to a building why not do it with that helicopter Ben immunise he used to manufacture black hand weapons years ago hey check it out he uses one grapple already you're wrong he used to grapple on the helicopter then another one on the girl like the black guy so he clearly has more than one and then another one to kill a guy behind the building this man's like a [ __ ] birthday clown need to make sure my gear is working I'll meet you at the factory they clearly spent a lot of time on this cuz I've had nothing but [ __ ] expositions so far in this game so if they're gonna tell a story you're gonna tell me a good goddamn story or at least just let me play the goddamn game hope everything works thank you this is why I play my feet this is why anyone plays whoops anyone plays this game see that right there that is what I'm looking for that's a hashtag Just Cause moment I couldn't give a [ __ ] less about an uncle being killed from a character no one knows I'm out Sookie I'll keep doing this until it stops being fun for me until I learn how to wingsuit really else I'll stop trying to pretend like I'm doing it on purpose I like the third one something like that let's get started can I just infinitely do this I'm coming in let's do it Jesus guys I'm sorry good lord appreciate the resub Branson amputation I know the wingsuit is self propelled don't worry I've cracked that code but that won't stop me from striking fear into the bad guys I'm here generators well-shielded i think i can use my grappling yah this dude swings around better than spider-man yeah check this [ __ ] out see I'm a goddamn expert dick my [ __ ] immortal oh and I got I got another plan yeah you couldn't hit an acrobat could you I'll keep him confused all right I'm coming up now boys and giving them white this shop yeah buddy Ella didn't prepare them for this all big moves am i playing on the easiest difficulty or something oh I didn't gonna do that god damn it I didn't want to do this this is too easy thank you for setting me down Mother's Day bucket hope you boys don't mind he really is Batman I don't even know how they're shooting me they're just kind of wishing the bullets towards me like this guy's looking all the way over there you're doing great boys I'll just kind of tap their feet you can't keep doing air scans down here I'm doing my job for me how's it going des droid hook your dad's good one man I don't know if this game has difficulties or not but I just chose the normal I didn't change anything how do I swing around to the other side of the helicopter Oh babies appreciate it lead easy appreciate the resub h3 Buddha ah such a soft landing whoops why is the helicopter pilots still coming after me has no one to shoot at me with is he gonna ram me the wing stops but no you know I don't know what is he'll intimidate him to death and then I'll kill myself in front of him that'll teach him to rebel that what a beautiful pilot thank God you know you don't often hear about those kind of heroes it's a shame what is up man yeah it didn't feel good did it you didn't like that did you oh you really didn't like that one you'll never catch me thank you very much I hope it was a nice wet [ __ ] that required a lot of effort to clean the choppers are intimidating I'll give them that they've hired the best pilots in the business so we really do need to take this seriously here let's go team it's a good objective I think this might be them who's my grappling hook no of course I do no cuz how else would you do it welcome aboard viridis emeritus perhaps oh so close dammit goddamnit I probably have to do something with this I knew it I'm a genius did she let you stay the night at least post pants [ __ ] the army of chaos it's not really what they call themselves I don't remember that I hope you laid the pipe the next day after you cleaned your butthole up I understand yes yes go get them frontline I'll continue to I guess really just kind of fly around I [ __ ] my girlfriend's pants for a hero I'll get outside up there I dropped my fish coming oh they started the fireworks without me it's not perfect I actually needed to take a piss thank you for the cutscene it's always a nice back you got us those guns just in time they black hunter deploying their forces across a river we won't be able to advance the line without more fighters any ideas we became soldiers after what you did in the slums great more chaos more recruits will come Oh army of chaos this is what you worry from the start Bhaskar Espinoza owns the silent Bay people can't fight him without losing their jobs their homes and even if they tried what chance would they have against a black hands we're having mutual ball Rico you help these people they feed their black hands we'll help you get to a score Espinoza okay I'll do it your way what's first I got some ideas Rico I will ready your eyeball with more information sounds great sure army of chaos how's it going screaming seaman it's good to see you man I'm ready for the next one team I will never remember that that's nice Brent where's my daddy said gorilla the gorilla has so many more options like it could put it in like a headlock maybe even a full nelson if it's trained in like Brazilian jiu-jitsu the gorilla could really lay down a [ __ ] massive biblical beat down on the grizzly bear all the bear can do is slash it's not gonna do much well I mean it would do much but gorillas gonna be much harder to get with that appreciate this up as well DZ okay let's let's uh let's do some [ __ ] alright good enough for me alright I'm coming maybe I should go over there and like help hey I'll go check on the other guys hold on you boys need help I'm swooping in you guys needed help or anything I didn't know it was restricted the bullets and all the bazookas and [ __ ] they looked really inviting huh it was an honest mistake Jesus Christ calm down all right I'll leave didn't realize I was trespassing I don't think the grizzly bear would even coming close how do I bring up the math again let's do it big moves yeah but the gorilla has like yeah I could do some cool moves and [ __ ] I hit the wrong button again I'm here alright let's begin now that my spines been adjusted thanks to the advanced chiropractics I'm ready you know this is a good opportunity to go fill up my water I appreciate these little micro breaks they give us most of the stuff you recovered is standard black ammunition but I also found some of these well not sure what they do we didn't want to mess with them there's a bunch more left in the truck good fine Sorento these could be useful they won't have a screw driver are you adding that your grappler no hold us you have to make do with whatever you find what are you gonna do with that get cheemba near that listo I'll drop the truck I've got a chopper nearby waiting to extract this make sure you get there in one piece but that's just par cero you're moving out be perfect I'm coming bundles ah I just [ __ ] do it who's this guy come here I wanted to interrogate you no no that's one way Jesus all unweight cruisin around all cool and [ __ ] come here what makes you such a hotshot [ __ ] zooming around here drifting around the corners and [ __ ] don't do it again now who are we shooting that boys Oh God Jesus don't hold a grudge buddy get over it it's not a big deal let's do it track him down boys I've been the victim of a hit-and-run I didn't see that the largest animal I could realistically beat would probably be like a pretty fat pig like an overgrown Pig I think I don't know about that only a little guy just truly do you think the gorillas just has so much more of an advantage yeah you saw that [ __ ] yeah I uh played him let's do it keep going all right my crackling hook loadouts that's nice I like that okay so this is how I do the tethers instead of making it like auto rich tracked and do it manually well I don't want to do that oh I see oh we did it that's beautiful a little present for Jesus Christ himself up in heaven well let's just do it here let's go see Jesus ourself boys I weigh too much hold on my balls are too big it seems let's go goddamnit I'm busy what can I send him up oh yeah okay well why does he get to go but we can that's kind of cute like a little Christmas decoration welcome aboard knick-knack okay I gotta oops I hit the wrong button just in case Oh baby I like that alright that's pretty that's pretty neat i [ __ ] with that yeah it should be plenty let's go team I'm kidding good luck Oh - hi-c switch the balloons to high power in the menu for me sorry I'm gonna do that before I forget oh Jesus what the what the [ __ ] is driving this just murdered an innocent soccer mom see if I can take us off now don't worry I actually outsmarted them just stay on the path trust me we're speedrunning now let's see how advanced this AI is Hey look at that we bypassed the roadblock then it why are you going back to Quincy roadblock Oh God he's lost his [ __ ] muffin that's fine I can get us out of this holy Lord I well you know I I don't know what he was thinking he must have been drunk I really confused him there with my plan we just weren't on the same page so I've learned you're improvised death was pretty impressive why are the vehicle drivers in this game suicidal I don't know but I'm really enjoying it works for me something for you oh [ __ ] wait sorry sorry ento come come back to the extraction point [ __ ] I already got it we're good Oh baby as I calculated and then check this out bang I keep doing that come back I haven't noticed any hiccups at the moment coming I have a plan booyah I'll distract him from above they never expected this maneuver yeah I'm coming I've peeled them off of our tail I will never take a soft landing I refuse oh just keep going sorry ento okay I'll catch up I'll check out this stunt check out this James Bond stun [ __ ] punch it why did that happen there we go that's how we do it oh that's going in his [ __ ] phase montage this guy's [ __ ] good oh what a wheel Jesus who is this cuz it's travis pastrana nothing can [ __ ] stop him yeah good luck now is he still going yeah what are you gonna do what about it now [ __ ] it's pretty cool stunt though yeah this man's a [ __ ] animal and that's a kitchen is he still behind enough I'm safe now I got a plan now they're confused works every time catch me come on sorry Emma I'm on we're good we're good I honestly want to go through the whole game without even like shooting a bullet only use the grapple in the wingsuit all right I'll hold them off down here looks clear yeah don't worry I got them check out the dive bomb Sargento [ __ ] luckily my neck broke my fall on that one get in the fight ladies harness get in the fight Jesus I missed again she's elusive let's do this the old-fashioned way I suppose by that I mean more balloons good luck surviving that fall he's gonna get up and start shooting at me pinpoint accuracy oh yeah I forgot you can actually drive in this game can't you goodness me this is disorienting no I'm sorry until I'm super [ __ ] sorry this is [ __ ] this is making me nauseous this motion blur all right well I'm never getting in a car again appreciate the hundred bits Jess oh I'm sorry didn't see that I just looked up I'm out and I'm coming back hold on Jesus I'm here action movie hero did we get him I got a good guy bad guy he can't tell his aim so bad I have a plan did this man just [ __ ] [ __ ] out a grenade he is [ __ ] fearless he will get the job done no matter what even at the cost of his own life alright help sergeant sorry ento to train the army no looks guy I need some [ __ ] training well let's see how this goes what a plan I like it I like the move Jesus's lady doesn't that I care who's left Oh I bet you were not expecting that maneuver were you all right so I don't so when I have the balloons on like in this loadout it always is gonna do the balloon it looks like where is with this one then I can actually like grapple to things yeah let me see that again with the other loadout yeah it immediately deploys the balloon the [ __ ] is that the [ __ ] is that thing we stumbled upon a rare Pokemon what was that I'm not letting it out of my sight was that a flying car that was a car right like I'm not losing my goddamn mind well where did it go oh wait oh that wasn't a car there was a news chopper hold on I'll give them a big special Ford Anglia from the Weasleys oh right there I'm just gonna start destroying [ __ ] who was that she's like a movie producer welcome aboard Jerusem okay off sings you at the entrance have evac on standby I remember back and the other just just cause you would destroy these things to rally the troops and things ricochet ricochet oh what a stunt oh this style Oh and that's how you finish it yeah where's the mission uh what am i doing yeah I guess I am supposed to be doing this where leg rather I can I don't know why says I'm not connected to the steam servers my style was to gamer epic for the Steam servers to handle I need some new weapons did you drop it that must not be done Jesus how strong it thank you Oh oh the style Jesus a [ __ ] natural again same strat well I'm a little closer than I was last time but it's still just as cool no you have infinite ammo no God no I keep running out of ammo all right infinite grapple so that's how you style what else I need to destroy that [ __ ] that hurt I wanted to blow up as I was falling damn it how much more do I need to destroy here there's no marker like there used to be let's do a scan here we go how much destruction have you caused so far today I'm not sure I think somebody fell behind you let's look for the intruder together he could yeah he could be this way he might be inside of this wall oh did she notice me now you hold that side down I'll go check over here is that her the shit's just floating I think he's still there guys why is this [ __ ] just floating it's like they don't even care about their game what is it bolted to if it's floating Jesus take a [ __ ] physics course you find him Oh God Jesus yeah you did he was right behind us the whole time sharp eyes on that man nice where those doors control it this way how many bullets can this man take I have yet to die in this game that I've actively been trying and I didn't lower the difficulty or anything is this straight just defaults which is fine by me man I like it I like the fact that he's nearly impossible to kill do I have to blow it up so I'm gonna have to change my my loadout just dismiss I actually don't think I can blow up this one I also don't think that battering-ram strats gonna work yeah it didn't do anything must be above now how the [ __ ] didn't it wait what welcome aboard floofy Maiden didn't it say the door controls were here whatever man I'm coming hang in there boys I'm in it watch out guys I'm coming in hot big boom baby how's it going grim [ __ ] yeah miss have fun together who knew leading a revolution was so easy for freedom is breaking you free oh it's definitely some fucked-up kneecaps yeah damn that [ __ ] hurts it's this man's secret to taking bullets didn't tell you don't worry I got it covered you never expected that move oh I got the sniper slowly but surely [ __ ] I've got him I'll never expect this I'm in that strategy won't work on me why do they oh they're so quick to deploy grenades on top of themselves watch out there's another [ __ ] got him I'm swinging back around man this is quite literally the same game I'm here what's up with worse AI somehow your quick switch between grandpa loadouts with C&Z thank you they hadn't actually taught me that one yet oh then I have a really good plan check this out that's not what I meant to do even my allies are damn near mortals I wonder if one balloons gonna be strong enough for two people oh and then wait I'll switch and then this guy extract him oh god yeah wait I'll make it to modern art out here and then is there anyone else yeah we got a couple over here [ __ ] join my sculpture oh that one's on fire too nice little aesthetic piece of Jesus cool little magic trick okay so then I'll add to her I might need another balloon here making like a family tree there anyone left okay I want to move my sculpture over here where's the other guys uh hold on I'll move that do I have unlimited grapples I'm a genius is there anyone left oh thank you for volunteering I'm gonna need another balloon there we go all right Alex it's like a big old penis now there's the two balls the shaft this man tugging on it just some poetic [ __ ] I wonder can they support a car no no no knows about idea bad idea what else should I add to it now this complete the mission tell my friend to not be a little [ __ ] and let me buy him a Christmas present thank you I love you let's get him a Christmas present anyway man everyone loves a Christmas present even if they say they don't be sad being a little [ __ ] I'm here what is up my friends my potential art pieces it was easy come on yeah I'm here later I'll play here I come again that's how we do it yeah just getting a good stretching oh hey did you boys see that stunt nah damn you're in the presence of a Cirque du Soleil God how strong is he oh my that is my favorite thing in the game right now another helicopter let's take out this guy that guy I do not want to fly it though I would like to see what happens if I put balloons on it welcome aboard Igor I'm getting disoriented what's happening oh no those are some cool stunts Oh baby man this pilot knows some real bangin moves it's that's amore and then all at once let's see if you can recover all the madman where is it bet you can't do it - what that's a shame and these AI pilots really have a hard time navigating [ __ ] without any Gunners you're nothing like the pilot oh that's right I have a stun grenade on the secondary here where's my team at I'm coming boys don't worry I'll clear a path that won't be bothering you anymore I'm kidding I'm bringing it back actually good luck dealing with it oh what a beautiful calculation just when you thought it was safe oh poor timing wanted it to land on him of course they do ghosts that means not exactly uncover on that move their ideas I have an idea thinking better idea let's make a ballooned out of it Oh well I got one of the sides down with the balloons I did it actually the balloons are keeping it up that one balloon is doing a hell of a lot of work oh it's oh what the [ __ ] happened to me I turned into Santa Claus down here kind of [ __ ] my team there at that balloon come on boys how strong are these buffoons alright I'll let the bridge down watch this you just gonna have to do it again Oh [ __ ] I won't use the balloon this time these little [ __ ] kit oh hey the bridge is down speedrun strats I'm coming team I'm here what took a lot of damage on that on that fall they'll never find me here sneak attack all right why did that happen welcome aboard just must easy Jess must not just muss might actually die I died I mean 50 concussions later I guess it was overdue really I actually didn't even know is possible to die in this game what a stunt you boys see that [ __ ] [ __ ] ignited a gas can with my heads collision do you see him well lay into him goddamnit oh there we go that guy's got the spirit literally jumping off of a tower but beautiful ai meadow min I don't know how we're actually beating these guys they're so well trained [ __ ] let's just be lucky all right let's uh let's get out here let's get real stylish mmm concussion compilation when we'll say Oh a little too hard in the paint did I do that with my melee she's not even dead she's just relaxing you're not [ __ ] fooling me you're not yeah I fooling me like that way no no come back come back maybe maybe you're serious then she might be done I'm coming team so upset seems to be stuck under the wreckage what are we looking at Oh check this check this [ __ ] out ready and then debris ready I mean he's already dead but I wanted you to see my plan well not quite it but you could picture how beautiful it would have been right boys her body was like a statue what are we shooting that what do we got what are we looking at I mean what's left there we go appreciate the resep I can't open my salsa ooh baby who threw that at me somebody toss in field goal posts what can i surf this hold on a second boys I'm a rip and gnarly stunts on this light post oh Jesus hold on that didn't work maybe on this stuff I've got it team and that didn't quite work I did dodge a rocket though so hit or miss I guess they never miss huh oh hey I just did that that's my handiwork right there I'm here yeah every time big move and I'll get I'll get the machine gun guy whoo oh man the [ __ ] folded like a suitcase down there what kind of specs does he have on anything about like easy it respects I'm not sure what they are and you put it together you'd have to ask him where's my boys out there they're holding it down for the good Lord Oh baby and the Lord has been good today oh they're gonna go for a nice ride they all jump yeah you can recover you can recover just in case I've got him on a leash I want to watch him holy [ __ ] what a move and see how he deals with me final boss battle [ __ ] where's the helicopter the helicopters the only goddamn thing I care about here there is do something about it but Oh big [ __ ] stunts what are you gonna do about it nerds yeah it's kind of what I thought who's last oh Jesus groups I'm doing it's not the last group I'm still hunting one was he killed himself that's the idea good work people the record time yeah [Applause] mm-hmm to the revolution baby it will be televised welcome aboard NMC nine nine five let's uh well let's just hit this [ __ ] this area is not too secure okay I'm gonna go take a hold on okay I'm gonna go take a tinkle real quick while I'm enroute welcome aboard Tom Savage [Applause] just where I wanted to be you ever run out of oxygen that seems like it how long was I in there Oh God I want to go back in [ __ ] Oh what happened my on I [ __ ] bruised me real good there I'm going back in they'll never expect me to do the same move twice go back to the water I'll get him like a mermaid well can I take one of these yeah that's kind of boring wow that's a strong one can this guy actually fly well let's find out get me off of your your vehicle and see what he does is this a strategy just run away is this what his parents taught him in school when you're getting bullied just back off oh now he's trying some moves finally now he's putting it back into it well I guess we'll see how this goes he's flying awfully close to the Sun here with this one Icarus the dangerous game he's playing [ __ ] I got logged on a runescape wasn't paying attention how good and different is justice for Just Cause for it's the exact exact same game so far but I mean that's fun was the first one was fun that's throw a monkey wrench in here by that I mean a balloon and now let it go big move all right goddamnit you set the mish oh my lord it's a Zeppelin I have a plan what's the distance oh Christ come on alright I'm chasing it Oh perfect timing Jesus Christ well I didn't even do anything over there that guy just can't [ __ ] Drive I'm gonna get some height appreciate the resub son of bra oh man indeed god damn it okay here we go I [ __ ] got it now [ __ ] Jesus it's about to [ __ ] crash itself over here I'm coming aboard the Hindenburg won't go down without me on it this time [ __ ] at the wrong key come on come on yes I'm almost there no who's shooting at my blimp who's shooting at the Goodyear we made it okay now I got to protect it what a move all right well I think I handled that pretty well Jesus this thing's a [ __ ] tank all right that's is anything cool I can do here oh [ __ ] hold on I want to I want to get into the cockpit this thing looks like a Pokemon like a rare Pokemon [ __ ] I just want to get in the [ __ ] there we go hey oh hey what's up man secret mission unlocked hey Bolivia's is this guy hey man hey can I come aboard guys been lobotomized maybe fell asleep looking like spider-man about the over the kiss on this guy probably not suck if well I mean that's for not letting me aboard oh I shouldn't have done that there was a way over here hold on wait I'm coming in actually now I can't get in no I just I just can't get in welcome aboard Anderson I hope this has like the softest landing of all time though it's not looking promising you didn't a nice little ass wiggle in here though soft landing soft landing get the landing gear out perfect we caught a nice slope there actually I think we are gonna have a really sweet and soft landing I'll watch from the ground yeah this is gentle as [ __ ] even in death he sneaks proves why he's the ace pilot come on baby set her down I'll be here to catch your fall if need be oh and perfect now let's check it out I imagine I probably could have done this without killing the guy you can't fly it engines offline yeah that's what it's looking like huh well how late is this thing I can push it with my body look at this [ __ ] this thing is deceptively light and I'll put the engines back up oh boy oh boy [ __ ] okay now I've given it a little push fly it god damn it I'm not giving up well I've entered hostile airspace with the birds there we go yeah I can get in from the top so I've noticed well I kind of broke the physics here it seems this kind of defies everything we know about gravity at the moment I'm a pioneer in the field hmm yeah it looks like I'm gonna have to just put the balloons on top oh what the [ __ ] man why did I go out that way okay let's uh we'll put a balloon here naturally just over here alright alright and then I'll just steer with balloons so now I'll just choose the ones I need to get rid of okay so I don't need I don't need that one anymore let's go right I need to put them a little more off to the side my steering controls this will work man I'm telling you yeah I'll be fine all right we need to go forward so let's overload over here this is just gonna have me back flipping I don't know what that one hit yeah I was thinking balloons on the engines to turn but I'll have anyway pushing us forward let's try it up you need to get the rocket grandpa upgrade you think that would help was that made to fly Zeppelin's and I think I [ __ ] this up lit up real good well you know if we ever need it I'll know where to find it because it's not going to move it's the physics have broken on it so it'll always be there a beacon of hope for the army of chaos it's the flag I planted in the soil just like Lance Armstrong no Neil Armstrong any that didn't sound right have you put up the Christmas tree yet no no I'm not oh my god another one waiting my old one just [ __ ] out a new one like a phoenix from the ashes this time I will not kill the pilot that breaks it welcome Nate it's not getting away from you that easy the Mission Continues come on baby yep nope not high enough yet you should thank the Zeppelin driver now we're beaming hard come on baby almost there gotcha finally all right got a working one no Jesus I hit the wrong button the army of chaos are gonna be so impressed with my Zeppelin I still can't fly it no Nana nananana nanana I don't understand shift I was holding shift oh well maybe I was in the wrong seat okay so shift this to ascend how many times am I gonna do that how do I steer Jesus how do I steer holy [ __ ] it's gonna be the slowest moving collision in the world oh come on baby go god no I'm going belly up uh it's like a manatee [ __ ] that's that's a hard bad boy to control right there rest in peace manatee crashed on like a sacred mountain though it's gotta mean something [ __ ] Pumapunku over here only people who watch ancient aliens will get that reference seal family products you can't I disagree don't believe Phil he's trying to keep all the good juices to himself classic Phil Swift let's begin the mission what the [ __ ] did I blow up that time it's just props alright Jesus Christ it's not real calm the [ __ ] down all right I don't know why everyone's so skittish all on edge appreciate the resub d squared I just blew these things up I'm reporting you for sexual harassment hashtag me to help chaos Rico I love everything about you man look the swagger the leather you're an artist my friend The DaVinci of violence which is why I need you for this picture I don't see what that I got the details later hey you see that barely floating rust bucket there see I need it to careen through the water my stuntman bless their square jaws they can take a left hook but they lack the touch of a true artiste so here you take these and I watched him die details appreciate the gifts uh bear Welcome Table Rock I'm [ __ ] in suppose when do I pull down my pants and show my [ __ ] well get you an agent we're gonna do amazing things together doll I'm excited Oakland welcome aboard Jin Zi Jin [ __ ] popping off now baby subs coming in hot all right so let's [ __ ] do it hey what do you want me oh I got a new one add boosters nice all right I got it what Oh baby nice [ __ ] yeah hold on wait I got a special surprise a booster for you as well baby it's that movie magic yeaaah well she's [ __ ] feeling herself now where'd she go alright it's not [ __ ] around stop [ __ ] around we got a movie to make let's go let's go yeah still easy still got the spirit let's do let's hit my ass keeps popping out which one hell of a problem to have I get in get it hey get it what the [ __ ] you doing Jesus she's confused mime trapped in an invisible box there let's hit it my hold on wait wait wait cars too slow wait one more booster let's do it you'll never catch us well I don't think it's them we need to worry about it but at the moment to be honest with you Brooklyn your magnum opus huh yeah I'd love to hear more about it I hope it takes place in Atlantis yikes that was one hell of a submarine right there kick it I'll give us a fun chase some cool [ __ ] I love the boosters oh boy I hit the wrong button hang in there Brooklyn what is happening to me tighter than a clams acid hide all right I got it I got a skadoodle real quick they've got me on the lockdown get a good shot of this for your movie they'll watch this watch this bang oh I didn't realize accidentally hit her with it but accidentally I mean like every wanted to hit her with it but I thought I mixed oh ho ho he's getting aggressive huh hey [ __ ] you Brooklyn I'm following this guy hey wait no no no go back go back go back let's go save her don't [ __ ] appreciate the resep overseer us damn oh my god she's he's gonna do it yeah baby oh he's like a dreidel don't give up oh there it is there it is and there it is baby [ __ ] too much too much too much too many g-forces [ __ ] I overloaded him run Brooklyn I've killed an innocent man [ __ ] I'm coming sorry Brooklyn had to catch some fish in runescape I mean Jesus Brooklyn this you wouldn't believe how many obstacles are in my way right now I'm here fake your death I don't think we need to fake I can just do it if you need me to I'm in I'm very disoriented right now I shouldn't have done this yeah I was a bad idea well boy yeah oh boy I hope the black hand saw that motion blur I don't think I can turn it off I can check welcome mods majesty [ __ ] yeah welcome Mark Zuckerberg 3 [ __ ] yeah exploding now baby 5 K subs here we come why won't you let me go back yeah gotta hit motion scroll down I couldn't scroll down nothing happens and if I try and drag down still nothing happens if I click down nothing happens I can't go down oh I actually have to do it one by one I can't just drag ok I don't see the point of that much better I don't know why I had to use arrow keys down it's 2018 welcome aboard the tiger [Music] I think I nailed it what is up my friends [ __ ] no Jesus came in a little too hot welcome Hazen and I got some plans out here some nefarious plans where is that there it is now that is art well I can't even distinguish them from the birds anymore beautiful Oh baby that how you want to play things huh I'll play dirty [ __ ] to dirty I'll turn your [ __ ] into my weapons I'm out [ __ ] oh god I'm traveling back in time sweet Jesus Oh soft landing thank you for catching me I'm here how did I kill them all somehow house was part of my plan welcome aboard dr. frizzy shortcut speedrun cameras very very sensitive have you eaten dinner will you be getting food soon I'll be getting a little snacky smack in a second whoa Jesus I'm still living there nobody sees me right appreciate the gifts up Lauren mission complete everyone's confused [ __ ] is the bet is the van not wrecked enough appreciate the resub rushed at how's it going birds help garland shoot her opus I like that one where should we go where's the next spot a car stunt pass through rings yeah yeah you got me [ __ ] up peas are all car stunts speed stunts okay let's do that hold on I'm gonna take the bus I think the bus is actually beefy enough to endure the rocket food Jesus no one here knows how to drive I'm not even doing anything let me drive please I will be getting you to your destination lickety-split some crazy taxi [ __ ] my friends here we go [ __ ] you got a little bit ton come on baby [ __ ] [Music] [Music] okay I have an idea well quite what I wanted but hold on if I turn the boosters too low I could actually use it as some like fat nitrous oh that's what I want right there give me that give me that who is this hero that's fighting crime in a [ __ ] bulldozer ah hold on a second I got it why I can like bunnyhop with it I don't even need the Boosters for this check this [ __ ] out ready and then I hit him with one of these and then I bounce on him outplayed this is horrifying they're so dumb they think I'm in a [ __ ] ground vehicle you guys hear that on the radio oh I cannot oh jesus that man was just help for blood no I'll get out put some boosters on this bad boy hey I'm glad you like it god I gotta get it now hit it yeah baby yeah baby yeah yeah this is how the equipment is supposed to work goddamnit boosters [ __ ] stop saying I'm in a ground vehicle I'm not don't degrade me okay I don't have enough boosters I think is the issue Jesus even the postman is getting in on the action all right let's do it I'm pumping Oh actually going straight it's just the right amount of boosters watch out dear Christ no [ __ ] come on baby yeah come on we can get out of this go go go an intense hydroplaning action baby I think I'm kind of [ __ ] here luckily my booster still worked completely underwater when they least expect it from the depths appreciate the resub mikeg glad you like the Soul Calibur welcome just want to be thick yeah I think this I think the dream is dead here goodbye how are you liking the game so far I like it but I mean it's quite literally just cuz three just pause three there there's no difference between the two games except you can control a little bit more with your load outs as they call them in here which I guess is nice but here if you're playing any of the load outs on anything other than the highest setting you're playing the game wrong the [ __ ] is going on over here Oh tornado they hiked the [ __ ] out of that hold on I'll get to the mission eventually yeah there's a tornado goddamn it welcome aboard show me the Father I can fight this tornado everyone knows tornados main weakness is badassery I'm coming in look at all the JPEG on that bad boy I said like a true American amen then I took a bite out of my hamburger dipped it in a Budweiser and you feel me fellow Patriot I'm almost there losing altitude I'm so close no one really seems all that concerned about the tornado I'm stealing the boat after a quick visit with the Loch Ness monster no no no no no it's close call he waited for me what a nice guy sorry I have to do this to you yeah everything has nos even the [ __ ] tricycles have nos [Music] can you swim course out of my way puny sailboat I could go around you but I'm making a statement you dick a small luckily as tornado seems to last forever perpetual tornado in this area [Music] [ __ ] you jetski guy man I'm really far away from the mission objective alright it started [ __ ] all that momentum god this tornado better not be about to dissipate out of my way birds I'll save the day tornado is not exactly threatening anything but you never know they're unpredictable yeah I'll be the first one to kill the tornado the final raid boss of Just Cause 3 [ __ ] his Lackey just tripped me up let's do it I have a plan don't worry town Jesus yeah I'll shoot it to death where's my rocket Oh God losing stability yeah and I got it oh god my rocket it's taking control maybe I can grapple it to the ground [ __ ] defense is impressive know the town I'm coming I should fight it from the ground hang in there folks I'm coming in for oh God I'm here Jesus yeah I'm stuck in its orbit all right I'm in I'm in a minute I'm in I'm in all right everybody stay calm how do I stop crouching it's the first time I've crouched all game [ __ ] no I just saw dog get picked up by it I think hey hold on I got an idea and then I'll activate my boosters inside of it and superheat it oh my stole my rocket launcher no it's eating the Boosters [ __ ] little too close Oh God it hasn't had enough with me I'm just gonna let it carry me wherever it wants me to go I'm just gonna let it take the wheel let's see where I end up under its guidance I'll be the one who controls the hurricane the tornado I wasn't looking oh it finished me off damn I'm still close to it how do I fight this every boss has a weakness appreciate the resub Shogun I did not try it with a car what you're coming with me oh maybe all I need is an old man come we have work to do [ __ ] that's not that won't do you let's uh let's get the balloons out I do have an idea a genuine idea oh boy well that was a bold move from you lady at it I really don't know about that one what is this guy doing he's driving towards the tornado all right well you know what I'll just let him guide me then he's got a plan you must feel like an action news reporter he's the only one strong enough to defeat it oh god another one this guy's smart enough to run away I'm still coming in full throw kicked me off well he is not going to be late to his appointment okay stop this stop this nonsense right now okay I'm gonna bring you towards the hurricane I keep saying hurricane I don't know why stay in your car sir it'll be much easier just stay with me here we're gonna be heroes you and I here's hoping the car doesn't blow up enroute goddamnit that's a good distance we're almost there almost there balloons and boostin that's actually Stan that you spoiled my plan yeah I was gonna use the balloons I want to like cement him to the ground okay here we go here we go here we go here we go get in there don't be afraid I'm a trained professional oh boy Oh Oh God it's not too late I'll carry on in yours but sick madman flew his plane to the tornado I have to see if he's gonna make it oh Christ where is he God is like a paper oh my god he's going he hasn't had his fill [ __ ] oh Christ where is he where's our brave hero god I lost that I lost sight of him is he already in the tornado battle up fist fighting it where is he does anyone have eyes on him where the [ __ ] did he go huh my man's got his tractor but where's the pilot I want to find that fearless madman again well Jesus there's no one care about the hurricane this man is flying his blimp through it no no no no no no no I'm just I'm just I want to watch that's kind of cool that it changes colors when it's over water versus dirt I want to find that pilot again he's sure to come back I want to see how he fights it in accurate meteorology what do you mean this [ __ ] split I heard they actually had like the top scientists work on the physics here in the meteorology this is how tornadoes actually work how many tornadoes have you flown a plane through there's gotta be more brave pilots out there I'm gonna wait I'm waiting it out I have to see more [Music] this game looks so [ __ ] cool it's very entertaining yeah you gotta beat it by moving in the opposite direction I remember that remember that lesson where is our pilot this tornado is never gonna stop if he doesn't come back when the world needed him most he vanished he's like Aang the last tornado bender they say the tornado doesn't move unless the pilot is nearby god dammit there we go is that a long white penis no I don't think so yeah [ __ ] wow these three cars are [ __ ] really beefed it how are these cars still in it and then I find this is a job that only a prius can do this is for you Elon Musk yeah I'll let your cars of the future [Applause] Jesus it actually can't pick it up well let's put some balloons on vase you didn't get in get in I'll be the new pilot what are you gonna do about it pussy-ass tornado it's got to be so mad right now what did it do fire an anti-air missile at me I wasn't looking how did the tornado just kill me that's upsetting luckily we're still nearby there's still a chance I'm gonna do the mission in a second don't worry this tornado really does just go on forever if left unchecked it lit a car on different car on fire their emissions yeah unfortunately emissions are really [ __ ] boring so far I like the movie directors mission I was kind of cool took away some of the bridge does that not repair it so be careful citizen the tornado stole some of the bridge well it's the least of his concerns oh my god a simple motorcyclists he's going for it he's shooting the gap no no oh god help help their out of nowhere Jesus Christ the tornados fooling even the best and brightest you pick me up I don't want to be in the water pick me the [ __ ] up man okay I think I've discovered the secret here the tornado can't pick you up if you're in the water there we go appreciate the hundred bits Hayden did you know the male China is big peepee I know that means Thank You Man appreciate the resub fiber monkey I beat it I'm in the eye I saved that I saved wherever we are Rico Ville you're welcome citizens welcome aboard walrus Wrangler we can all sleep peacefully again isn't that right dear well let me strike a pose with you no more shall we ever fear the tornado my wildlife frit what the [ __ ] no more shall we live in fear of that tornado eh can I ride you go Jesus Jimmy being a little bit of a pickle here I got a plan I'll help you out okay and that should be good they're going the wrong way Jesus I think I snapped its neck the g-force is overwhelming please learn to steer good God Oh baby I appreciate the five gift subs desert dog [ __ ] yeah man welcome aboard sipping on milk and rain of oranges exploded out of nowhere we love the animal [ __ ] and beating the tornado okay I see it I'll follow the trend but I'm gonna hit this mission real quick while I'm over here on the opposite side of the map his vicarious the only tool song you like no I like schism the pot stink fist and that's probably the ones I like the most I wouldn't say any of tools work is bad though it's all pretty [ __ ] great but I hate all of Maynard's other projects perfect circle Beus of fire appreciate the two hundred bits Jess go to the bridge and see if cars just drive off it's a good point and curious excuse me boys well that's a big [ __ ] cow they don't we watch the motorcycle guy drive off it's not far away I might as well come over here and look oh man they made quick work repairing that holy [ __ ] I'm glad I came back appreciate the ninja bits I'm glad you enjoyed the dear you've gone red Oh baby that's a fat [ __ ] raid from Robert goddamn it you just missed me fighting a tornado with my goddamn fist - you choose like the the most low testosterone moments man thank you means a lot if I'm ever streaming and go off before you do you bet your ass I'll send the troops your way Robert fight another tornado well I mean I can't just like [ __ ] summon I'm not Yugi moto if I see another one yeah I go out of my way to fight it Roberts Roberts a bit shy he doesn't want to come on the podcast we're an intimidating group of men does this game make you feel like spider-man it makes you feel like you have the biggest dick in the world fought a tornado man yeah I think the thing I actually really like about this game is the AI it's so [ __ ] brain-dead it's amazing it's genuinely awe-inspiring I don't want to do that mission welcome aboard Tilted tiger my uber eats finally got here thank God my man enjoy the grease balls what's the point of this game god dammit gotcha prawns just the [ __ ] around and no one watches the the cutscenes pays attention to this story why is this the cutscenes the time to fill up water take a piss holy Lord it's a stealth bomber mm I'm doing that I'm just doing the main mission I [ __ ] around enough it's time to get back on track and see how we save Christmas or whatever the [ __ ] the story is have you ever caught vaping at Wiggles concert have you ever been caught vaping in a Wiggles concert I've not mmm I think the main reason is because I haven't been to a Wiggles concert but it's also probably because I don't vape either so a little Colin a little call me explain that anomaly that sounds about right I think hope Hades might have been a writer on this game gliding man makes big boom-boom on million-dollar sights copy and paste it all over the country is a pretty apt synopsis check out this James Bond [ __ ] I blew it yeah it's not another tornado an underwater tornado this time Jesus tornadoes just don't stop coming it's like a game of school tycoon where you always just make the natural disasters happen at the school give me that sailboat can't you see the raid boss excuse me I'm actually now I'm not gonna I'm not gonna go I'm not gonna go that far again it's super far out of the way already did it once I prove my point I'm up [ __ ] simple miscalculation novice sailor yeah that's sexy G all right baby we're feeling it now give me that sailboat nope nope [ __ ] oh god my nutsack is inching up a storm holy lord it came out of nowhere I see they're still fighting over here my nutsack scratches itself your mom sounds super generous [ __ ] Oh quite the tumble on that one there yeah how is Just Cause for it's literally just it's it's the third one quite literally the third one the only difference is they let you change your loadout a little bit like a certain things about it the genuinely the only difference between the two games if you fart it helps with a nut sack itching like it helps me itch my nut sack er it helps it not it it looks worse than the third one I think visually it does I'm really not sure let's make some art you gotta get the little pig involved the big pig involved we're gonna make a nice little carousel for the children what is it stay there we go Jesus how much is that way it's holding down two cows this thing is a lot more to meets the eye than this it's [ __ ] big well what I was hoping would happen is it starts spinning in the air like some type of anti-aircraft merrygoround but I see that was simply a pipe dream Jesus [ __ ] is going on here get him boys I don't know to root for luckily the civilians don't seem to mind they're still on their way to the supermarkets and such throw some balloons out here to make it an even fight well you know it's only fair that they get a balloon as well Godspeed my friends change balloon booster - hi [ __ ] it is that was the first thing I did why the [ __ ] would I change its it why the [ __ ] would I have it at anything other than hi mmm thank God my face broke my fall that could have been nasty oh and how many [ __ ] blimps are there well this one's actually getting involved in the war hold on student well there we go I'm coming to help now hold on a second team I'll take him out your hole what the [ __ ] now you shot out a group of birds all those aren't Birds they're toys where's that blimp I'm here to help fight the dog fight get them guys Wow the boys are [ __ ] them up real good let's do the mission can you blow more [ __ ] up then in the third one I don't believe so I think it's about the same main difference being the tornado as well what is up lady would you like a balloon what's with the rotor braid blades can you make sure she gets to the outpost safely can't wait to meet her good cutscene see that's what they should all be like two words and then just get me in the action they cannot tell a good story sure oh good pull dog [ __ ] yeah let's get it no doubt some rock and roll gonna be blasting through that radio up the graphics I'm pretty sure they maxed sounds like a plan wait I have a plan I have an idea a statement if you will there's [ __ ] my going oh Jesus Christ alright well it's here I might as well use it for the mission I mean am I gonna say no to a Zeppelin what am i some type of [ __ ] [ __ ] come on baby there we go crisis there we go this guy's on a collision course I think he's trying to kill himself here we go let's do it it's wrong why are you playing in 720p I don't know what you mean by that how do I still not understand how to steer I can only ever fly in one direction and change the radio [Music] what what why did that just happen I want to learn to fly this [Music] what do better a park bench or a city girl does that mean I did it again welcome aboard pie Goodman who has any ideas on how to steer this because it's not WASD arrow keys q e or are all of which I thought might might work C and B that does not work either though that was a good idea its numpad then it's not numpad it's not space space sends me out on top of it again I'm not looking in settings we're gonna do this as a team it's gonna be a bonding moment for us shift just makes it go up Charles holding shift and then choosing a direction doesn't do anything either just makes it go straight up well at an angle rather escape + escape click and drag No so far the only thing that does anything at all is shift and that just makes it go up page up and page down no Z&C do not work i already tried yeah arrows don't work I've already tried oh hey look another blimp [ __ ] yeah god they're everywhere habit all that does is skin huh I'll look it up in the menu I don't know if they'll even have controls for it but we'll find out no maybe in plans okay well I tried all of these but and we'll try it again right now I am holding shift Z and a now W and now D now a no W all while holding shift now control now without holding anything oh Jesus Christ hey can you see the keyboard I'm holding Z I'm holding C shift in Z shift it's just making me go up I'm not turning shift Z na still not turning doesn't doesn't work I don't think you can steer blimps while the other guys do it the AI steers it I'm out and [ __ ] it [ __ ] the blimp it's super slow no it's not I we watched him turn that it's not slow hey I turned that [ __ ] like an easy boosters I guess I could have used boosters looking helicopter for the controls for helicopter I'm sure the same but they probably work in a helicopter they don't work in a blimp here here's a plane we can try it out right now why did you tell me to up resolution to 1080p at 1080 this is all default settings welcome aboard goose shades no you aren't okay then I'll up it I just put it all at defaults this is what it starts god damn it this is what it started me with whole new ballgame see on this it works just fine see on this I can actually fly relatively speaking see this is easy but none of this worked on the blimp blimp machine broke well alone I have an idea hope I stalled that wasn't my idea I wanted to do some cool [ __ ] I'll regain control I'm out Sookie it's not gonna hit the blimp no there it is well no serious damage I can probably fly her out that's what I get for trying to do some barrel rolls you had to download the blimp driving DLC well no this is a newbie soft I shouldn't even know who publishes this game any minute now I'll be there men is he must be super upset it's been like 50 in-game days thank you wait come back square enix okay oh baby just hit level 83 fishing there she's where is she nice to meet you what no chopper here goes I think I found one yet Oh what do you got holy [ __ ] it's a lot of options that was a pretty rough spot for it but I've already got my sights set on the news chopper don't worry about it is he I found one gonna work out fine I've got a present for you easy god I hate that lease it's not as bad as in redbud say you tetra oh my god it is there's this a rock story game it's not quite as bad with a abandoning objective there she is you elusive [ __ ] no I'm talking in-game oops forgot to call it someone tell Tiana I did not call tetra [ __ ] why is the pilot on a veil you're gonna make me fail a mission then I can't call it it again because she's unavailable that's so [ __ ] dumb well that just immediately killed my erection let's sit here and be friends huh makes me Auto fail a mission because I didn't suck on her tits and wait for even though she wasn't even here she was a ghost welcome aboard Kenz and Dan teal Don teal can i hookers damn nothing is breaking that concentration you're a rock god damn okay well let's see how you fare with the Boosters man she is rock-solid what's your pc specs no idea drop swear AIDS yeah I don't know my specs old man Andrew put it together for me and I think he posted it on Twitter if you want to look there appreciate the resub Nova thanks for the quite awhile of watching man you have two pilots I think it has to be her why would that oh oh okay well [ __ ] yeah I didn't realize that I thought it had to be her okay well you want to be a little [ __ ] bang hey watch out is he heads up is he be careful - it'll work out fine what no cop in is he listo just got here let's hit it mmm-hmm expert pilots a new horn yeah whatever don't don't if this guy is this game work 60 or how much would you buy us for I didn't call tetris [ __ ] I didn't call tetra a [ __ ] I was talking about Izzy real cute what just Tiana you may meet you well this is these death is on your conscience now apologize you if I didn't call tetra [ __ ] I Jesus I'm sorry your mother's a [ __ ] lunatic she's not your mother you were adopted actually why don't you tell her something like that now you really didn't do it huh sleeper [ __ ] adopted have fun nice more CD I have to go through this goddamn exposition you know she she had to learn Sunday gerbil mega adapted yeah some [ __ ] year Bowen enjoy the so but I wouldn't mind seeing the final one if I can like chop them up with the blaze thank you for cushioning the fall pilot runway operator thank you man nobody cares just his job yeah a little pillow for the helicopter to land on how am i enjoying it so far it's a lot of fun to [ __ ] around with but it is quite literally just the same game again a hundred percent there's nothing different really okay let's uh let's let's speed this up whoops sorry let's speed this up okay I'll meet you up there how about that what a save did she make it easy is you you're you break a rib or something you little [ __ ] I guess actually don't need to run with there since I just have to come up here anyway Oh speed run actually says perfect timing I needed to go get a water anyway actually I grabbed a snack - this might be a long cutscene I'll be right back we're pushing the forward but none of that matters unless we can disable yeah plus defences easy and I have been working on that all of these facilities house prototype weather course and each four is connected to a pass defense network with artillery see if we can plant a virus in those weather course we can send a message up de network causing malfunctions in the towers machinery Tillery then we just have to Blizzard one thing at a time Mira tell me more about the facility is housing to weather course this is Sona uno is protected by a sandstorm mirror here gracias easy was that information on a place called Lamas Maura it's a prison hidden in the desert something Gabriela said I think my uncle Lonzo might still be alive if he is he's being held there and you can help us get into Sona he helped your father build project the upper Buda if he's still alive I'll find him here you've sewn a trace according to easy is not on the network but I have an old friend say sir he has a theory that might help us then let's hear what he has to say and this is sown at those we don't know much about that vision are you ever going to answer this I'm not an agency man anymore Rico those coordinates are closed look thank you that can't be a coincidence I'll check it out I'm sending you all the data you'll need to your ireland's good they start hitting on Scott Irwin it hurts hello my elite gaming squadron I am pleased to report that I've got my nutrients Oh Big O I had some yogurt downstairs as well Greek yogurt Oh Oh actually who wins pretty advanced maneuvers used by both pilots here let's get a closer look I feel like I'm watching like an animation on YouTube like some really bad Lego [ __ ] this guy's just [ __ ] taking it oh they're taking turns it's like turn-based combat okay take your bets which ace pilots gonna come out on top of this one it's anyone's ballgame really you think the left one really couldn't tell you Godspeed tom key tell Casey nice that we say hello there's some edge-of-your-seat action here baby welcome aboard Bob - Bob oh oh oh a little joust man Oh ma'am I do wonder if anyone will ever win we'll go through a few day and night cycles as long as it takes to finally get a victor here we're [ __ ] doing it baby oh yeah that try not to finish my food so I guess while watching the show we'll do something else I play a tetra or something I'm committing we're staying until we see who wins I actually think left is gonna lose he seems like there's some sparks going off on him or something might be flares I'm not sure how's it gonna be [ __ ] anything can be marshmallows for all I can tell what if this battle doesn't end this isn't scripted and it literally has to end appreciate the resub spiky-haired ninja appreciate the lurking how's it going fatal warrior uh-oh uh-oh oh the moves the moves I feel like the devs are pedaling oh the devs were patching the game mid-flight to make them actually do something the right one wins I knew it I [ __ ] told you I was coming I [ __ ] told you that was coming our champion our [ __ ] heroes the another taking a victory lap I hope someone I hope another helicopter challenges it well what's he gonna do now he has no purpose left welcome aboard tab key and thanks for 100 bits sir Dave why doesn't you just land there's nothing left for him up there is there I'm gonna start fighting birds or something on a desperation no you know I'm coming up there I'll take your shift man you've you've done plenty you have like a 10 day war with that other helicopter I'm coming it's wrong I'll replace his shift is that him oh god no was that him oh that poor guy oh wow it made quick work of a mad time you never don't do that to my friend he fought so goddamn hard oh what a move see if that easy well is sad the [ __ ] is happening here I don't even know where I'm supposed to go where's my where's my objective are you my objective you and I do something I guess not all right say hi to Jesus oh yeah mustard beautiful very well-spoken DZ do I really have to go all the way over there and [ __ ] destroy things which one wasn't I'm assuming this one yeah yeah I'm not traveling you know airfield [ __ ] that yeah forgot about my runescape no more fishing XP I think that the game can kind of play itself I mean it quite literally can the AI always kills itself anyway [ __ ] fish but swag roll up you bought fishing I don't see the point in botting something like fishing especially with mobile now you can just click it yourself and it be just as efficient I see why people would bought runecrafting though god that skill [ __ ] sucks I'm ready show me some butthole and I'll show you a tongue hey dad I'm Sheldon well I guess you got my message don't clear Mita who's that piss and [ __ ] it's all women want when you went dark at yes someone must have hurt ya figured I'd look there's some of your old files see where you might end up hey it turns out your dad was working with Oscar Espinosa back in the day called Project Diablo oh good nobody APPA no there's lots of buzz about Solis at the agency these days only if someone's gonna give me like a big stack of monkey nuts I know you're looking to take out a yeah Perico I've already done some of the legwork you screwed me over more than once at Medici I don't want your help something well you're gonna need it Calvin bazinga it turns out that place is constantly surrounded by a nasty lightning storm fried poor Annabelle here that seems pretty suspicious to have a standing live in a storm like that don't you now this sounds nice this sounds like a good mission I already killed the tornado I'm ready for a lightning storm now not exactly Peter Morales his thumb Sheldon known him for 20 years he cannot be trusted Weymouth don't listen to this guy senorita pleased to meet you Noriko and I were just discussing the situation with zona dos and you know how to access decor I don't know anything about the core but I got a good idea how to get us past that lightning storm yeah then I'll shoot it we figure something else out he's got a plan Rico the lip-syncing is so bad we don't ruin [ __ ] on dark Sider threes lip-syncing but not this one for some reason lip-syncing in here is just as mad okay now there's a river there also for some reason their facial hair and regular hair are constantly phasing in and out weird the same basic concept you want to make a lightning proof vote bingo now I also hear there's a nearby research lab that's testing a way to harness lightning figure we find something there to protect the boat spares poor Annabelle's fame you're talking about that facility in the mountains Mariola you got it and we could do the custom boat look at Prospero asti arrow interesting coming around aren't you this beard is made of glitter yeah that's what I'm saying like for some reason the facial hair is constantly phasing around it genuinely does look like you just stuffed a bunch of [ __ ] glitter on his face you want to take out a Appa I want to help you do it besides we both know we can't have just anybody running around with a weather weapon for God's sakes stop telling me a story and just let me do fun things like now it's putting me to sleep [ __ ] man we meet up me to your lab when we're ready sounds good you know for a minute there I thought you were gonna shoot me not these time Sheldon badass at least you can complete this game what do you mean by that the game couldn't you complete appreciate the gift sub scoots all right I'll find it myself obtaining the iron coil well let's go I can't do it yet let's it up a J I'm doing my part aimin man yes you are and thank you [Music] there it is that's what I was trying to get out a little [ __ ] exorcism there what was that letting get to read all that appreciate that thank you for the resub Jeb welcome aboard hey you for the resub Jeb sir I got my uh thanks mixed up what was that about Darksiders the third one's ending was missing until an update came out thank you for the 500 bit scuba ace was it really hold on I need to look that up myself yeah I don't see anything about that I don't know where you found that can you link me up don't I I take that back don't link me [ __ ] can you tell me where you found it because there's nothing online about that that kind of be big news Hey all aboard PG aid welcome spirit turtle 64 [ __ ] exploding baby that's what I like to see out here sorry I'm actually doing the goddamn missions in this game these just [ __ ] suck thanks for the reefs of dirty shovel they do Smith at 500 that reads it hmm all part of the strategy Oh actually have a new strategy yeah check this [ __ ] out ready as long as he stays docile no no no no no no no no no no hold on I'm gonna be the first one to surf one of these bad boys like Sponge Bob said the Pioneers used to ride these babies for miles to the Oregon Trail whoops stand still god damn it too aggressive appreciate the gifts of atomic guava OOP yeah oh that's a that's a rough landing there oh goodness me like this place was made to kill wingsuit users there we go here I have a plan check this [ __ ] out there's a nice little stunt for you perfect you must be rodriguez revolution a new motion Minh like all the non-serbs service explained he said you'd be able to bring him the equipment he loves a whole revolution of confiscating his things over by the waterfall oh boy this is gonna be a boring as [ __ ] one defeat them you can take these equipment to him it's a two months my way sounds like a plan let's [ __ ] hit it mmm here I come hey I'm here oh god damn it okay and now and then and then oh what the [ __ ] there we go I'll take it well that's not what I was looking for first say nice out guys having a good ride damn I'm having the hardest time with that artwork welcome aboard zealots oh this game looks boring as [ __ ] oh man these missions are stinky oh these missions are a [ __ ] fat stink fest but just exploring and [ __ ] around nice this is making me mad tired be worth it amigo I'll retract there oh I only had it at medium nice I promise you I don't know what I was thinking there happy birthday I missed your last three messages in the chat the indigenous food place I don't know Jesus this game would be so much better to the story what they needed was just hey here's a bad group of people doing some bad [ __ ] a lot of time to think in prison huh you have no idea sent your order yes I've got a suggestion for you stop caring about history or whatever the [ __ ] is going on I'm not even paying enough attention the goddamn exposition I'm here hold on hold on hold on Jesus oh boy this little stunt planes a little difficult to control and more so than the others I'm coming in for a hard landing open that [ __ ] perfect just as I drew it up if I donate a hundred thousand flying a tornado did you bring what I asked deal see their stash is safe for now want to put that gun down it's not a gun señor Rodriguez it's a relic a figure of a dongle mid 16th century who cares [ __ ] man it's you that's gonna run away with it to protect it it's very precious mm see the black and were very interested in your collection yes well the truth is a very powerful weapon no it's not now when it's about history Jesus Christ nobody cares about history nerd you really think Doran goes tomb can help you take down Espinosa take down perhaps not it's credit most definitely and this is Otto wrong costume Oh hardly now this is merely the tomb of his servant sumac I've been unable to proceed further without my red track motor did you bring it I think I think I'm done with this story I think I've had enough let's begin I think I'm gonna call it quits on that this is this is awful this is really bad the missions are all the same go really far away listen exposition do something super quick and then come all the way back really slow listening the exposition and they get a bad exposition cutscene this game can't tell a story it needs to stop trying it's very bad at it god damn it it's great at just giving you something to [ __ ] around with well it's going very slow I hope you don't mind Rodriguez I have a plan this is way too slow for my face there we go much better nope needs more okay please oh god it's taking flight that looks about like where I would roll normally naturally had I not intervened appreciate the resep heartland 70 it looks like the moon from Majora's Mask like it's the son of the moon it's crashing into the earth now you wouldn't believe what's happening the ancient Mayan magic is oh my god Rodriguez this is this is amazing this inside a balloon into the mix welcome aboard unleavened bread where you go oh there it is is it gonna roll to where it's supposed to be no I there's no way also doesn't even do damage that doesn't seem like it I wonder I wonder hold on a second we're getting into some weird territory I wonder what would happen if I brought the boulder all the way to the tornado what do you think do you think they programmed some type of doomsday code to handle that situation let's go to the tornado which way is it I don't remember where the tornado was or actually think I'm pretty close to it isn't it always on this side of the map or was it the exact opposite side I don't quite remember needs more boosters though I know that much let's see oh you [ __ ] [ __ ] of course yeah I'm not gonna be able to take it to the tornado that's frustrating well here goes my hot-air balloon yeah that's really upsetting well just I kind of just want to know where the tornado is for my own peace of mind really at this point oh boy I'm gonna have to definitely restart the mission there's no getting this back in position Tim I want to get one more good look before I give up maybe the tornado is really close do you think the previous Just Cause games had better stories but no of course not I don't remember anything about them except for the new cried at the end of one of them damn it the tornado is all the way over there well I guess it's never too late to try whoops damn it I'm trying to hook it to the ground so that way it gets like a little momentum going that way but I think I'm too high and definitely too high maybe you can use the molder after the mission yeah I'm just gonna let myself get killed if that's even possible [Music] Oh Minh really getting a bit of a rug burn on there you can use it after the mission it shows up as a drop okay well what's a restart it then what quality preset are you playing it I don't know what that means everything default except I up the resolution my arm Thanks something like something I see how much you're getting paid to play this game I don't get paid to play [ __ ] thank you why the [ __ ] would anyone see me to play their games half the time I end up breaking the game or [ __ ] on the game in some way I don't know why they would want that how cynical if you become anytime someone plays a new game I have to be paid for it I'm coming in yeah he's an ancient sculpture person this one made me so much easy what an uninteresting story all around I'm taking the Express route that's it that's it it's too much the floor of the cave what do you see there's a mechanism in the ground looks about the same size as the head it's a giant lock Rico the OVA is the key I'm Way ahead of you why not there's a human skull with a candle inside I know I heard you get the rock drop after the mission Oh check it out there's text on the wall I'm buried only five beds remain funny we muffin if it's gonna screw over Espinosa appreciate the resub fondleburg well thank you man welcome aboard Captain Crunch daddy a door opened up oh no another [ __ ] did he get down here it's cows awfully suspicious mm-hmm how did he survive the fall Rodriguez I'm sending you a cow up to analyze it might have the location of the Treasury trust me it knows more than it's letting on oops take my word the interrogation may be maybe a bit behind schedule now this trust me Rodriguez you're gonna want to see that oh boy come on the truth will remain buried I suppose game play [ __ ] the story yep couldn't agree more now this is it this the story just [ __ ] poop ass like this the stinky ass I really don't know why they wanted to tell so much story oh do the tornado thing yeah I will I'm gonna go do that right now let's see if my theory is correct where is it that was this way yeah it's this corner of the map Oh a bit of a miscalculation there nope a little bit of a miscalculation on that as well to be honest with you well oh boy this rock is just full of disasters there we go that's what I was trying to do he's not invincible we've seen well actually only one time we've seen him die one time on foot now we'll wait for the tornado to spawn they shouldn't have made this game I agree to a certain extent this is not a full-fledged new game it is literally the same assets from the previous installment with almost nothing new so far I'm maybe it really opens the [ __ ] up at some point but right now it is the exact same game except for being able to do the loadout changes even visually it looks like the same game oh man [ __ ] nailed me I'm just looking for a hurricane a tornado guys I don't want any trouble well yeah come back here I want that golf cart no Jesus well thank you for pulling over it seems your vehicle has gotten in the way of me breaking my ankles thank you now let's put some nos on this [ __ ] it's too slow for me punch it [ __ ] also get us where we need to go eventually no sign of the tornado yet no god I got out just in time Oh God yeah I didn't see how this happened I'm assuming I went off the road I can still salvage this hold on it's not letting me dive right well sorry how far am I gonna get very far no I'm on the wrong side of the map this is absolutely not it the tornado was like doubt Wow it's a big map oh wait no it's not that big the tonight it was down here there's the bridge it destroyed yeah yeah is this the I don't know that means will Peppa Pig or some [ __ ] you can't say I'm too familiar with the show whoops I can't track anything over to here thank you for waiting for me to steal your car I was super sweet they're good easy quilter like fun at work man I'm actually about to call it a night here in a moment as well there's games making me super [ __ ] tired well the story is rather that's my fault for doing this story like a [ __ ] idiot I just want to try the tornado thing that I'm calling it a night calculated all I'm stuck I fixed it where is the goddamn tornado oh yeah I am just gonna kill myself do it again I can handle more give me superpowers give me your best shot [ __ ] not even lightning can kill Rico doesn't even interrupt this glide Oh there we go had just the right amount of speed busted the [ __ ] out of his leg I didn't wore last night branch that was the most unfun meme game I've ever played beating even the likes of tab [Applause] hey whoa whoa wait a second I'll [ __ ] take that just out on the bayou am I going the right way more or less I don't understand why this ant Ward meme was so popular I played it last night I gave into the meme and we were all miserable like it wasn't even like entertaining ironically it was just boring for everybody fast I can't fall I can fast travel somewhere a little closer it's a good idea I think I can go here can't I yes I can and then the tornado should be over there no there it is I see it [ __ ] yeah give me the jet what the [ __ ] it's fast goodness me i havi I couldn't care less I thought his name was Rodriguez here I come again baby yep good start appreciate the resub Frodo Devin's when you're gonna do some moist some ass moistening a runescape gameplay I played some runescape last night but I recommend this game for just open-world [ __ ] around I mean how fun will that be where I excuse me for how long will that be fun is the question I meant to pose I'm already starting to get tired of it and I've only played three hours granted I think what's really [ __ ] bored me as the story goes lines with you being utterly disinterested in anything anyone has to say you're one hell of a mod Oh tough one you can get it next time Rico have you seen a specific Easter Egg regarding Just Cause for I'm assuming you're talking about the getting over it Easter egg I know about it I don't know where it is how the [ __ ] you flying you wouldn't understand Jesus the AI just cannot operate vehicles play a different game could probably call it a night in the moment keep FK fishing my runescape [ __ ] damnit I tried to shave his head with my penis there just missed oh here we go watch this but God how much longer till the turn it no it's it that way I just want to try the rock this looks like a Just Cause 3 DLC because it certainly is like I said there if you thought destiny 2 was basically the same game this is ten times as blatant but again it is fun that's the only thing this game has going for it [ __ ] god damn it yep there we go we okay where's that tornados [ __ ] now we're in it okay here we go no we got time [ __ ] yeah that tornado is gonna disappear by the time I get there I'm calling it oh boy I'm excited for smash of course bungee can't ship a complete game this isn't made by bungee and the game's not incomplete are you just making a general statement it will kill you instantly you are super wrong lesbian I've already [ __ ] with the hurricane the tornados that so far has been some of the most fun I've had on the game [ __ ] with the first tornado doesn't kill you it all just makes you go around in a circle is the game on Steam yeah I thought it was an ubisoft game so I thought oh how do you play wasn't surprised to find out it wasn't show off the guns and [ __ ] there is nothing good about the guns I'll go ahead and spoil Christmas for you I don't think anyone will be using a gun when they play this game if you are you're playing the game totally wrong the gunplay is straight out of 2006 what makes the game fun is the grapple and the creative ways of killing things and handling certain situations is it worth copping if you haven't played the Just Cause 3 then yeah it's worth getting if you played it it's probably not worth getting it's just quite literally more of the same why pay another $60 for what you can already get because you have it god damn it oh boy come on come on there it is any new feet the only new feature in this game that I've noticed is the load-out [ __ ] you can change how intense your balloons are your jets are and your tethers are you can change the intensity that is the single only new feature I've noticed don't worry citizens of Townsville I'm here to save the day let's call it a shrub oops you [ __ ] lied to me he does not drop in the boulder quick drop a helicopter [Applause] well [ __ ] ooh it snapped a spine on that one he's fine have you played the new Fallout no no [ __ ] idiot well I don't know what else to do with the tornado that I haven't already done I really wanted to summon the boulder but clearly that doesn't work maybe finish the quest first I did it's a quest line Austin I finished the quest and their missions just so you know so now he is a contact like these guys out here so then I find him in the world and I do his missions it's not like I abandon the quest man as you call it edit the loadout I don't have him as a supply drop only he'd be able to drop me the granite bolt on the big rock I imagine exactly no there it is but ya see he I have to unlock him unless I need to finish his quest line do you feel silly now everyone who caps locked Edit load out its we're not playing it we're again I don't know why that meme is so powerful I really don't get it I really don't well then let's see how the AI responds to the tornado again maybe we'll have some more fun moments there but I don't think we're gonna see anything we didn't see the first time goddamnit area it looks nice the weather yeah I mean he said except the tornado that's why I didn't bring that up hey I think I'll just call it a night you go to bed early you gotta get up early anyway can we at least all good Jesus I don't know why they always do that the helicopters are drones or the tornado like moths to a flame it's super [ __ ] impressive look I guarantee you that helicopter comes all the way over here out of his way to get killed by the tornado I'm calling it just give him two seconds yes to register that it's here there we go see you're smart damn making me feel like a [ __ ] idiot now wait wait he will come if that shot hits everyone owes me a sub oh my god oh hold on if that hits everyone owes me a sub Hey same deal come on baby come on baby oh that's right on the money that's right on the money [ __ ] god damn it alright I need to can i supply drop ammo I didn't want him buck oh that's that's upsetting that's such a [ __ ] shame that would have been a beautiful shot oh well so be it desperation shots well I'm gonna head out well thanks everyone for tuning in to Evan who donated a big thank you I really appreciate it to the new subs welcome aboard enjoy all the emotes the sub means a lot to me so thank you I hope you like the emotes we'll go ahead and do a raid cuz I typically forget but I didn't this time we'll raid GB she's doing Kingdom Hearts oh but so is tiana I'll let you guys decide I'll put it in your court they're both doing Kingdom Hearts we do Tiana pretty often though I don't think we've ever raided GB but it seems overwhelmingly in favor of Tiana so here alright everyone again thanks for tuning in and the sub means a lot and hope you like the [ __ ] emotes I forgot to change the sub button acts time so you can look forward to that take it easy everyone see you up

Channel: Cr1TiKaL Full Streams - Random Videos

Views: 147,345

Rating: 4.7074671 out of 5

Keywords: Cr1TiKaL, penguinz0, youtube gaming, livestream, live stream, charlie, theofficialpodcast, kaya, kaya orsan, moist meter, jackson, andrew, huggbees, zealotonpc, critikal, cr1tikal, critical, cr1tikal livestream, Tiana, cr1tikals girlfriend, girlfriend, game, video game, stream, critikal livestream, critical livestream, streaming, Speedrun, critikal live stream, full stream, Fortnite, Full Streams, twitch, twitch stream, moistcr1tikal, cr1tical, the official podcast, big moist

Id: wvuE8iHFKW8

Length: 222min 18sec (13338 seconds)

Published: Sat Dec 08 2018