Kevin Bozeman on not spoiling your kids - Clean and Unfiltered - Dry Bar Comedy

you've asked me for a bite sauce out Oh merely would assure you to your cubes the standard doesn't exist here's an answer when you can no longer afford their Christmas list it's not rocket science we need my son game is Christmas I was like yeah man Henry I'm sorry we can go halfsies daddy [Music] came out with the worst list this is les he's like look dad I need a I need a smartphone some Air Jordans and then I've had like whoa playa Saturn I'll do iPads Santa does Legos and action figures to which you responded well I feel like I had a pretty good year so i'ma keep it on my list and then we just uncomfortably stared at each other [Laughter] [Music] and finally I was like well I'm Santa Claus I didn't want to tell you I was hoping that your friends would tell you and then I would avoid it but you had backed me into a financial corner which is three thousand dollar Christmas lists now redo your lists and keep it under $150 wipe your tears it's like we are young crowd here's some good parenting advice it's the scariest thing you have to worry about as a parent you have a key see your kid do something to let you know that they're probably gonna be an awful adult just little things just little subtle things that you pick up as a parent and no one else sees me like this can't be good later so you just slowly start saving up a little slush fund form go to the bank yeah can I get those in unmarked bills because what you do turn them in and call like the FBI I just want you to know my son is the person of interest you might want to file with him for a while little things like this my son did he's a hey Dad can I get a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the jelly no for one you just ask for a peanut butter sandwich secondly why wouldn't you want jelly nothing goes better together than peanut butter and jelly it's the sign of a solid relationship and if you don't believe in solid relationships that means you're probably not gonna pick up your kids for the weekend she's supposed to have [Applause] little things the little things accuse got it too easy that's the problem too easy what I mean - not the word - but the number - too easy because I got that - parent love to parent love is overrated I'm sorry to say that it is I know it's great to have both parents but not when you're trying to raise an athlete [Laughter] this book kids are pretty good at basketball but they never we're gonna game is they got that two pair of love they come home they got air conditioning heating covers full of food video games like watch you guys go outside and work on your game it's too hot out there dad it's comfortable in here meanwhile a single-parent kid who doesn't know who his father is hates his home life mother's always Yellin enemies always hungry so he's never at home and stand he's at the park working on his game six hours a day and he is going to destroy my kids this is my ground my kids have told him this is why I'm leaving your mom you're crying were leavin us cuz you won't practice I don't know what else to do my hands are tied you see me every other weekend and get your act together so they do all they do is walk they want the moon's the Stars they want everything won't won't won't you give it for him and then just let it ride they always think they think want stuff are like my kids came on three days a dad we we really need a pair it a $300 talking bird I can see why you we need that however I'm just not gonna give it to you you got to earn it so this is what you do you get all A's each quarter I give you $25 each for each quarter that's $200 and then if you do that I'll kick in the third hundred now I'm not gonna do that but I'm just trying to motivate them it's a non-issue they didn't get all A's but they try my son one time gets in the car half crying I'm like what's wrong with you two and three B's and now let them get a parent I was like subscribe to drive our comedy for even more of the world's largest collection of clean comedy

Channel: Dry Bar Comedy

Views: 1,064,526

Keywords: stand up 2017, Dry Bar Comedy, drybar comedy, Spoiling, bozeman, Kevin Bozeman Dry Bar Comedy, comedy, Funny, Season, kevin bozeman spoil kids, Basketball, dry bar comedy kevin bozeman, dry comedy bar, Grades for Parrot, kevin bozeman dry bar, dry bar comedy kevin, Kids, Work Harder, vidangel studios, kevin, Kevin Bozeman, Parrot, VidAngel, standup, Single parents

Id: EvEQih__ek8

Length: 6min 10sec (370 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 24 2017