Toad: "Now Mario and I are where we were at the start, but if I drive smart I can win." "There's not much to the race now at all" "Gotta time this right." "Squiddley diddley-doo." Blue Shy Guy: "What was that?" Toad: "Don't interrupt." Peach: "You want to talk about that NOW?" Luigi: "Well, it was the goodest time than any." Peach: "It's laughable that you think you even handle me and Daisy at the same time, when you can't even do it with me for more than five minutes." Luigi: "Oh I SO can. Take that back!" Peach: "Thanks, Luigi. You have premature problems." Luigi: "No I don't!" Peach: "Ah! I can't see!" Luigi: "It's all over me!" Peach: "You did this to me. You always do this to me!" Toad: "Now I got to figure out some way to get past these two dumb fucks." "The star was a lucky break, but it would only help if I used it at the right time." Peach: "You!" Toad: "Don't act like you didn't have it coming! We could have been perfect for each other!" Peach: "Maybe if you were more taller, not a jackass and a completely different person." Toad: "I can't help how tall I am!!! Luigi: "Leave my girlfriend alone, you midget spigot!" Mario: "Your girlfriend?!?" Luigi: "Oh shit..." Toad: "Peach and Luigi are totally doing it when you're not around!" Luigi: "You son of a bitch!" Mario: "You son of a bitch!" Peach: "Why do you always carry this around with you?!?" Mario: "You're not getting away this time, you BASTARD!!!" Commercial: "Then cmon, and show you moves, in F-Zero GX XX." Blue Shy Guy: "Wait, did a commercial just interrupt your flashback? Toad: "Sponsors.. They stick with you for life. Now pay attention, you sick fucks!" Commercial: "If you love Mario Kart, then stick around tonight after midnight for the Falcon Raunch-!" "-est racing show ever filmed. Come get your falcon kicks with a special guest meant to wild you up with Goron" "and have one hell of a time!" Blue Shy Guy: "Jesus!" Red Shy Guy: "Make it STOP..." Commercial: "You want violence? WE GOT IT!!! "Do you want sexy times?" "We got it!" "You want sophisticated highbrow political satire intertwined with compelling the new ones character development?" "Go watch BBC instead, we ain't her for that shit!" "F-Zero GX XX. Every Monday and Tuesday night at 12:30 a.m., following The Late Late Show with Jigglypuff. Be there, or be a FUCKING IDIOT!" Blue Shy Guy: "Ok, yeah. Actually write that down." Toad: "Now, as I was saying..." Mario: "You're not getting away this time, you BASTARD!!!" Yoshi: "Hey, you can't use a gun." "Oh, you're wanna do this NOW?!? Bring it on Mario, I've been waiting! Toad: "Then I remember. Hey Harambe, nice gun, but don't you think it's pointed the wrong way?" Donkey Kong: "You won't fool me again this time, you nut fuck dickhead fatty motherfucker!" Toad: "Jesus..." Donkey Kong: "Stop calling me African names!" Mario: "Well, you have managed to get this far." "But you're running out of tricks now, you annoying, little arouse nugget!" Toad: "That's the best insult you can come up with?" Mario: "Is that the best comeback you got?" Toad: "Hang on, I'm no the failure here." "It was getting close to the finish and I was taking a beating. It was-. Are you jerking off right now?" Red Shy Guy: "Sorry. Yeah, just, uh, you're a very good story teller." Toad: "The finish line felt miles away, and my car couldn't take too much more. We would both get one last shot" "This was the moment of truth. He had a weapon I didn't know about, and I had one he was clueless about. "Worse, we didn't know when the either would use it." "I didn't have anything special," "But his next move, Beguiles me." "For a moment I think, 'he's pulled back. He's given up. I've won.' Then I realized what the weapon he has is." "That son of a bitch got a bomb!" "He's daring me to drive just a few steps forward because then, I'll be in range for him to blow me to smithereens." Red Shy Guy: "When you say blow,-" Toad: "We sit for what feels like hours. Then, I notice the gangs on their way up." "I see his smile and think 'what the fuck is he thinking now?'" "'He's pulling back. What the hell is he-' Then it hits me." "Oh no..." "He beat me..." "He outsmarted me..." Nooo! *everyone screaming* Donkey Kong: "Not AGAIN!" Blue Shy Guy: "That's where it ends? that's where it ENDS?!?" Toad: "No." Sponsor: "Welcome to Smashbits Animation Studios!" "We've got the highest quality animation in the entire worldwide WORLD! Come on down. We've got quality. We've got animation." "We've got quality animation! Nobody is qualified enough to beat our quality!" "We've got three quality packages: high quality animation! ultra high quality animation!! and quality popcorn chicken!!!" "So come on down and take a look at our quality store!" "We keep our shelves stocked to the BRIM with quality animation that you can buy off the shelves like merchandise!!!" "Animation is a service we provide, but yes, you can buy it like you buy fresh produce cuz that is quality!!!" "Packages, nobody, popcorn chicken, merchandise, store, NOW NOW NOW!" "'Hi, my name is Rick Jones, and when I started smash bits animation studio, I wrote a song, and this is it:'" "'When you find yourself in trouble, you can always come down to SMASH BITS ANIMATION!" Red Shy Guy: "Did the sponsors let you know they were gonna run your life like this when you're signed on?" Toad: "Back then, a guy like me would do just about anything for a buck: cage fighting, prostitution, "Mario is missing, hugh. Life's a shit storm you're never prepared to weather." Blue Shy Guy: "Ok, but What about the rest of the story?" Toad: "Oh, right. We just took one to the face harder than Little Mac against Mike Tyson." Luigi: "ohh..." Yoshi: "What happened?" Wario: "Did we just get bombed?" Bowser: "I'll kill him! I'll rip his eyes right out of his head with my dick! Wario: "What...?" Bowser: "I'll rip off his hands and reposition them so his index fingers are pointed." "and then I'll tape his hands to my dick, and then I'll just keep poking him in the eye with my dick hands, until they pop out!!!" "Too much?" Toad: "Don't talk to me, dude. And then, they speed away." "I can't move. I'm done. Defeated." "And then, I notice it." "Someone left a fake item box. Probably as one last joke that tripped me up, but they left it in the worst place possible." "If I Drive off the lane without help, I'd just get snatched up by Lakitu, but he can't grab me while I'm spinning" "Technically, it's cheating. Personally, I don't have a single fuck to give." Mario: 'heh heh. Imma gonna win.' Toad: "This Kingdom ruling barf bag of an eighth-place camper isn't going to take another championship from me ever again." "this is my last shot." "This will be my legacy." "The one-time champ of the 150cc and I feel at peace. I feel beautiful." Mario: "No, it can't be possible." *Slow Motion* "Noooooo" Toad: "No!" "This is mine!" "I won, I won, I won!" "Fuck you," "Fuck you, fuck you," "Fuck me, fuck you," "Fuck you," "And I feel bad for saying anything mean and negative to you because you tried so hard and still lost." Mario: "Enjoy it while you can, Toadstool. The feeling is'a fleeting. And the fame never sticks around." Toad: "And he was right. The fame didn't stick around." "Here I am, telling my story to a bunch of shy guys on a Saturday night." "While Mario gets sucked on by a Birdo on the final lap of Wario Stadium." Blue Shy Guy: Why did you stop racing?" Red Shy Guy: "Did they find out you cheated?" Toad: "No. Nobody knows, except for you all. I left of my own volition." "Can't even look at myself in the mirror now. Let alone see my face displayed on a lit-up celebratory billboard." Blue Shy Guy: "You're still MY hero, Toad" Green Shy Guy: "Yeah, me two." Red Shy Guy: "Me three." Toad: "Lot of good that'll do you." Green Shy Guy: "Well, at least let us buy you drinks tonight." Toad: "You guys got 100 bucks I could spare? I hate asking, but, as you can tell, life's pretty rough for me right now." Blue Shy Guy: "Of course." Toad: "Much obliged." "Hey... Power to the people." Blue Shy Guy: "Wow. what an amazing story." Red Shy Guy: "Yeah, what an interesting guy." Green Shy Guy: "What a real hero!" Blue Shy Guy: "Hey, does Toad come her often?" Monty Mole: "Well, you mean that guy who was just in here? Yeah, he's been in here every night for the past 40 years." Green Shy Guy: "Wait, what? How is that possible? He used to be a kart racer? Monty Mole: "Oh, he got you guys with that shit, too, eh?" "Look up the race of '97 on your phones real quick." Red Shy Guy: "Wait, Yoshi won?" Green Shy Guy: "That guy just windowed us out of 100 bucks!" HEY Paisanos, it's the Super Mario Super Show, only on smash bits animation. This is Brian, he's the animator this bad boy. Uhh, I want to thank Andre Cicilline, Who's been helping me out since the first episode of this, uh, Big thank you to him, uh, Chris Turgon, and some bender. Alright, also by the way. This bad boy. We've got eight more plan, We don't know when they're coming out, But their plan, they might come out so hit the bell button, you'll be notified of every video we've got coming out, See you next time. Make sure to check out our patreon. Thank you. sure to check out our patreon. Thank you sure to check out our patreon. Thank you [same message sped-up]
