All right, we're
checking out the only game where your entire job is to die
before you're 60 seconds old. It's Murder.
So Murder is a game that seems incredibly simple in that you first
have to kill the man in front of you and then take his spot as king
before you get thrown into the dungeon. But each time you do this, the lineage
of the king changes in some odd way. You'll see in a second.
Yeetle-deet! I like to enter from the feet. I love how you just, like,
absorb his clothing and poop out his body. So now from here, the idea is
you need to not die as much as possible. And the bar at the top
is basically like your life bar. And you have to see how much you can
get done before your life bar goes down. And depending on what you do,
there's all these different endings. I love how this king over here is like 90% nose. It could be a nose, it could also just be like a giant
sausage that the king is holding hostage the inside of his crown. Did I stop him or did
that guy have a heart attack? Oh, this is like the guy's brother
from the first time. I love that he's trying to kill me in
exactly the same way. I don't think I've ever gotten it.
just on, like, the first try. This many murders you can see at this
point, I'm starting to develop a beard. I didn't actually think
I would get this old in my in my time is king. Look at the giant pack of people
murdered inside of the dungeon. There's so many. And by the time the new one gets there,
the other one is already dead. You would figure maybe at least two of
them would get to meet at some point, like they would like at least one person would still be alive
when this second person goes down there. I also have to wonder
if it's the exact same two guards that I that I've been employing
for the past like 60 years. Look at how big my beard is, now. And I guess, like, the further
you go, the more ridiculous it gets. So even though I am about to die here, I think I'm going to die here
and there's no way out of it. Like, I finally I finally
run out of heart. POWERS And now it is
time to have the slow, arduous heart attack. What? Why did this man have to die? He didn't do anything wrong. I don't even think he was part of this... Not going to lie,
medieval times is incredibly scary. It's the only place I can think of
where it would be like very. It would be like very normal
to just get murdered on the toilet. Like, that's some Game of Thrones
level stuff right there. And the first body inside his mine...
This guy's entire family is going to die because I'm bad with reflexes
at games like this. But, you know, you look at me,
you look at the ceiling. All right. I guess he was just
looking at the ceiling, at least like sniffle
or something before you look at me. This has to work, right? Oh, yeah. I also enjoy
how every single person that dies has the exact same underwear. Like there's only one place
in the entire kingdom to buy them. And that's the place. So if I just let myself die
here, what happens? I'm just curious.
Yeah, come on, do it baby! Yeah. Do I get to. Do I get to be this guy now? I'll tell me. I do. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's bad. Oh, it's me. Oh, my God. It's- It's just me again. Now, I'm very interested
to see how many different- Mmmmmmm.....
The dungeon is going to be so packed. Like there's not even going to be space
for any more skeletons. when I'm done.
Will you just die already? I've got things to do. Oh, he has a slightly different
pair of underwear. That's good. All right. I've already had you do the thing. I need someone else who's not you. Okay, here we go. I haven't had this guy kill me yet.
Wonder if I get to. I get to enjoy his life or something. Go ahead. Let it happen. Oh, yes. This is a fine chianti. that also makes me vomit out my colon. I love how he inserted
how like they do it before the crown. Like they put the crown on first
before they try and do the insertion. Go to sleep. I'm waiting for, like, a random dude
to jump out of his chest over here, too. I can't believe that I haven't been killed
by one of the objects. Just chilling out on the background. My guards have to be wondering
how all these people, like, get into the palace
with this many weapons. It's because we have them
just on every wall. Okay, now, I've never died to this guy yet. I don't even know
exactly how he's going to murder me. Are you gonna, like,
choke me out or give me a massage. Like, what's going on here? It kind of.
Oh, he's just hugging me. I love you, too. There's like a marriage that happens-
Oh, wow, we're having an entire life together. I love how, like,
the artwork in the background is the knife that I used to gain my-
Oh my God!!! Like, if I was going to have a son,
this would need to be him. I think he needs the force. The only king who is able to shove
an entire block down his throat and live to tell the tale. Also, if you if you hold
down the spacebar, you can actually lift this up
and just slowly vibrate until you go insane.
Here, watch: Yee yee yee yee..... Now I'm legitimately curious. I have to unlock all them. Why are you so good at killing
my very first player. Second time is literally always the charm. Also this is fake kings. because if you drink anything, it's
always poisoned and you're going to die. No one loves you.
Get wrecked. So this guy has, like,
a different colored drink. Does it matter? He's
also wearing a fantastic pinstripe outfit. Okay, I remember what happened when I ended up, like,
you know, getting engaged to you. I'm not having that happen again. While our son was incredible, I only need
one of those psychopaths on the planet. I love how my beard is just like,
slightly undulating on its own. There may be something actually
living in there. I don't know. Please let me have enough
life left to kill this man. Thank you. Unfortunately, whoever is next in
line is going to be the one that gets to murder me. No, we're all the way back
in the beginning. It's you. How could it possibly be? The game is still going. Like there was no ending. So now I'm back as king. This. This this is, like the longest running murder fest I think I've ever had. Oh, my God!!! But the amount of bodies in there, they just keep going. I thought maybe it reset, but no such luck. Like all the random shopkeepers
and stuff like that are going to be like, man, I don't. I don't know what's going on. I feel like the population inside of the kingdom has gone down
dramatically recently. Well, someone had like a birthday hat under there.
Did you see it? Okay, so I'm actually going to die
to this guy now, so that's fine, though. I'm going to let this happen.
Go ahead. Do it, do it. Do it. Why? What? What is happening?
How come we're just. We're just, like, walking together?
Why aren't you finishing me off? Oh, I guess you just let myself- let that-
Alright, well, that-'s that's probably the best way to kill the king. Just wait it out. I kind of want to die because I need to see who was wearing
the birthday hat down there. Come on, catch me. Catch me. Are you serious?
You're just going to die. You've caught me every single time except for the one time I want to know
what's going on in the dungeon. All right, well,
I guess this is one way to find out. Tell me what you see
down there. Yeah. Legit. Someone's had a birthday down there, it's just like a whole gaggle of peasants. I kind of want to die. Please take me out. I need to know. Oh, my God. They overthrew the king and they just completely
destroyed the kingdom. I thought things
were supposed to get better. Is that a human being on a pitchfork? I love how this guy is just so unimpressed
at the rebellion. I had nothing else to do on Sunday,
and that's why I'm here right now. All right. What other endings do you have for me?
And blast him! I'm not going to lie any time I kill someone in front of sausage nose,
I know it's going to be a good run. I just. I can feel it. Also, imagine putting a chair here, like, who's actually going to sit there with this guy looking, like, looming over their shoulder
the whole time? All right. Well, we had to start off somewhere,
so. You're right, buddy. Any time. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What happened???
What's with the voice acting? No one actually killed me.
You don't get to be king. You didn't do this.
This isn't you're doing. It's just shoddy workmanship
on the chandelier. I don't even know why
I need poison to kill this man. Because it's quite obvious that
the castle itself will just murder me. So the poison just seems like. Like, an extra cost that could completely
be removed from this entire equation. What is this? What is this? It's a ghost. No, not today. I'm not getting murdered
by any kind of chandelier this time. Actually, I kind of want them to just,
like, overrun me and see what happens. Because the problem is, there wasn't actually a chandelier there
to kill me in the first place. I tell you, we just started,
and the dungeon is already looking, like, fairly busy down there. Oh. Oh. Am I just going to leave that there. I kind of want this guy to be the king. He looks like a legitimately good king.
I'm going to let this happen. Go ahead. Give it to me, buddy. Come on. Do it already. Oh. See? Now he put effort into this murder,
and that's what I like to see. That is a king. He's got the golden beard,
the rosy cheeks, but unfortunately. So that the game can continue- I was going to say, I have to murder you. The only thing that's weird is his nose
looks like a pinky finger. Like it looks like his nose forgot. Got to grow up. Ah, yes, the townsfolk. I remember you all. What about him? But
what about the last guy? Like he was involved in ths, too, you know, guards?
There! Yeah. Go join your friends. Actually, I kind of wonder, like, if I die to him-
His buddies are already bones! How long has he been following me? I was going to say, I kind of wonder
if the final townsman is the one that- Really? Kind of feel like-
There we go, I was gonna say I kind of feel like that should easily be an execution worthy attempt at my life. All right, go ahead. Hit me. How many are there? All right, unibrow. You know where we send people
without good manicurial skills. What happens if I do look at you? Oh, it is sucking the life from my face. Okay, so now this is a good opportunity
to see if that last town's person can be the one.
Yes. He's got his hands in his pockets. Oh, the one at a time. Okay, so that was the first Towns person. That's the second town's person. And if I just die of getting, like,
a splinter lodged up my rectum, what happens? There's also an area here
where I may die from this. Did I die from two things at once? I got double killed. I don't need your kindness. I love how simply just looking at me
with lustful eyes. Oh, he's saluting. Is enough. Is like probable
cause enough to kill you. This one's a hard one because you got to be, like,
right in the middle, right about there. Stop it with that music.
Oh, God. I want it. I want to do it. Do it. Do it. Yes. I don't know if that was décor or planned. I feel like it was just part of something that came with the castle
when we bought it in foreclosure. Like they just left that sword up there. They were like, listen, this sword's an antique.
We don't want to mess with it. Okay. Also, is it just me or
is that a bite taken out of this weapon? Like, who did that? Are people in the kingdom starving so much
that they're just eating steel weaponry? You realize you could be putting that
to better use, like by killing me. Nine out of ten weapons in the kingdom
are used to murder the king. It's very obvious at this point. Like, my guards have never actually
used their weapons to save me. They basically just hold them tightly
while they take everyone that I look at slightly judgmentally and toss them
into the dungeon for all time. Yeah, deal with it. I'm not looking. You're not sucking 20 years off my life
again. Oh, God, no. Please. No, thank you. You think I could, like,
maybe pick this sword up and, you know, use it to defend myself or. I don't know. Now, I kind of want to know
what happens if I just never die. Oh, this is bad. Oh, maybe it's not bad. I thought I was going to die from that,
but it totally let me live. So I don't think there's a way for me
to stop this from happening, which means that someone is going
to get my crown yeeted into their abdomen. I think I think that's
what's about to happen here. It'd be nice if you instead became king,
but I think you just want to kill everyone who laughed at you when you were a child. Yeah. Hold on. This is a
this is the red drink. I wonder what happens
when I drink the red drink. Good. Tammy. Tammy. I only got one we got with the red drink. Is it still murder
or does it just get me drunk? Oh, wow. So I'm, like, healing. Yeah. Ah, wait. Did I heal? I have no idea
what just happened. I'm invincible. I just took the invisibility potion. The drink is actually down there now. I can't be killed. I am- I am effectively immortal. I'm like a vampire, which I probably am,
because I never go outside, actually. What does the king really do? The only thing I've really done is-
What does that say? Why don't you trust anyone? Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Hold on, I need to see that again. Roger, I need you to die
so I can fight. Why don't you. Why don't you trust anybody?
I don't have a choice. You keep killing me,
so I have to keep stopping the death. Come on. Keep. Keep
stacking the bodies up. I don't care how many it takes, I'm
going to find all the endings. All right. You're not going to. Come on. Lift it all them all the way up. You're not going to lift it. We're just here walking
infinite together forever. All right, guess I'm leaving. That's it. Did I win?
Did I win the entire kingdom? Am I the king of the century now? Eternity. I got eternity here. Oh, yes. All right. Let me walk over here. Just for blood. For the blood. God. Yessss....
Look at my crown of death. of ultimate murder. I lived in eternity as a king,
and all I got was a crown that looks like it was specifically made
to murder everyone around me. Anyway, folks, hope you enjoyed this episode of Murder.
Until next time: Stay foxy and much love.
