How To GET Game - My Process for Getting Good With Girls

so I got a question recently Todd how do you practice game not what is good game not what are the techniques of game but how do you practice game and I think this is a very appropriate question because I see so many guys they've been doing game for years they've been trying to apply theory and they're just not getting that much better I'm part of it may be a misunderstanding of theory but a lot of it is maybe they're not practicing game in the most effective way so what I'm gonna do right now is I'm gonna give you kind of a global view of the process of practicing game that I personally would recommend and there's some different factors we're gonna go into we're going to talk about how often you should go out and when you should go out or talk about what you should focus on while you're in the field and then we're going to talk about how you should analyze your game afterwards and those three components put together or what's gonna kind of you know make up a good practice regimen for game it's what's going to ensure that you're consistently improving consistently getting better ends towards the goals you actually want so first off how often should go out how much should you be practicing the basic answer I would give is just go out a lot go out a ton right but there are better and worse ways to do that and I'll give you some examples check this out so I'm gonna draw for you guys a little weekly calendar here so I'm gonna try and divide this into seven which is never an easy thing to do but here we go with a one two three four five six seven all right seven okay front loaded towards the start of the week so it's a bunch of different ways that you could go out and do a lot of sessions most common way you see is let's stack it hard on Friday night so let's do an intense like four to six hour session like SATs are Saturday night this would be Saturday right to an intense four to six hours on Saturday and if you do that maybe you could do let's say like you do like 15 to 20 approaches so you do 15 to 20 approaches and that would be you know a decent amount of approaches for the week that's okay amount now obviously you could do more but that's a decent amount of approaches for the week but there's one huge flaw with this go out and go hard on Saturday night kind of a scenario this actually maybe a couple huge flaws but the major one is that you go out hard on Saturday and then you have six days to get rusty again to get out of practice again and to have your brain convince yourself that you have your normal life for six days a week and then you have one event where you go and do pickup so it's very hard to internalize the idea that going out and doing approach this is a normal part of your life if you're only doing it this one segment per week the other major problem with this by the way is that you're not gonna get a lot of pulls over the course of the width this week because you can going out for that four to six hours you probably get one pull at most so especially as you're getting to an advanced level you're not gonna get as many really great results where as much practice of that later game because you truly have only one like event or one night in which to poll and the polls take time individually but the major problem for a practice perspective is this you have one day of going out and then you have six days of getting rusty it's not gonna work as well let's look at something a little different let's say you were to go out and do one approach every single day so you're gonna do one times an approach here one times an approach here one times an approach here one one one and one now you're truly making approaching something you're doing in your everyday life right you're making it something normal for you making it something that it's it's an everyday thing it's a habit you can't just say oh you know this isn't something I'm doing in my life because every single day you're doing it at least once so that aspect is really really good however there are a couple of problems with this first of all let's look at your volume of approaches well now you're only doing seven approaches in a week instead of 15 to 20 so you're gonna make it a lot harder for you to get good fast because you know you're not getting as many reps however you are making it happen the other thing that's really good about this this everyday thing is that between each rep you would actually have time to go home analyze think it through and improve in between that's another problem with this 15 to 20 in one session you can do 15 to 20 approaches without a lot of thought and analysis cuz you're just doing the approaches there's not this loop of doing approach think it through get some feedback come up with a plan etc you're just doing them in bulk right so there's not a lot of adjustments between your approaches alright so here there's maximum adjustment in your approaches but there's four your approaches and that's a problem the other major problem with this is a psychological one which is I bet you've noticed when you go out the approach that you do first is the one you're most scared on you're probably the most rusty on you're probably like doing your worst game if you do a game plan like this we're doing one approach every single day every single approach you're doing is your most rusty most scared worst approach so you're asking to get worse performance in field because you're giving yourself no form of momentum no form of like warm-up of any kind all right so that's very very difficult so in terms of what to do in a session I really really recommend doing at least three approaches in a session if you do at least three approaches in a session you're giving yourself a chance to warm up you're giving yourself a chance for it not to be your most rusty approach every single time and also you're giving yourself a little bit of a sample size the other problem with this one approach a day thing is let's say you have a bad approach on what is this Monday you have bad approach on Monday now you have to wait a whole day to do another approach so you have a good approach on Tuesday you're on top of the world all Tuesday thinking you're the cuz you had one good approach and so you're gonna get this very like wild swings in your emotions like oh one day you're amazing at game because the girl was receptive the next day you're terrible at game and it's gonna feel very inconsistent and very very swinging with three approaches at least you're getting some kind of a sample size every single day so I recommend a minimum not that you should limit yourself to three necessarily but a minimum of three approaches when you go out so that you're getting a little bit of a measured sample and you have you know real legitimate results and an opportunity to get some warm-up in terms of days of week to go out I recommend doing at least three because now you're developing the habit that is a normal thing for you so you could technically do Thursday Friday Saturday and now it's a little bit better now you have a couple sessions where you can you know go out and then have some feedback and think it through and go out and have another session etc this isn't actually ideal because you're still doing four days off in three days on so it's until not quite a part of your life it would actually probably better if you're doing to do the Friday Saturday if you did Friday Saturday and then maybe like a Tuesday or Wednesday or something like that or something like that where they're all not all next to each other but whatever three days a week whatever way you do it is still kind of probably be enough that you're making it a habit and making it a part of your life so the minimum that I suggest and again this is a minimum if you want to go out and you want to improve I suggest you do three sets per session at least three times a week now does that mean that it's not better to do five sets each session no it obviously would be better to do five sets that session does not it wouldn't be better to go out five days a week no obviously it would be better to go out five days a week right but the minimum really if you want to get good and you're doing an effective way would be this three by three now is that to say if you just had one night you're gonna go super hard you can't get good that way it's not saying that but it's going to be less efficient and tougher and to be fair even though you're only doing nine approaches a week here and you're doing 15 or so here I think you'll probably get better doing the nine a week with consistency and analysis then doing 15 approaches a week of just hammering them through without thinking about them okay so you can make your process clearly more or less efficient one quick caution I don't recommend going out and doing way way way too much in terms of approaches either I don't recommend doing like ten approaches a day seven days a week simply for the reason that you'll tend to get stale it will tend to make you a one-dimensional person where all you're doing is pick up all the time rather than having a life and you may start to hate it and it may start to feel like a chore for you which will mean you won't be bringing energy and positivity and like a good vibe to the sets right if you start ever going through the motion or if pickup starts feeling like work or boring then maybe it's time to cut it back a little bit alright so I don't recommend the seven days a week ten approaches a night anything crazy like that I would recommend slightly more than 3 by 3 as an optimal for example probably when I was when I was trying to get back into being a professional pickup instructor when I've been playing poker what I actually did was something more like three sets a day minimum and probably about five days a week minimum but then a lot of times my three sets I started having fun and I ended up doing five or six or seven sets as well so I think something like that is is pretty ideal but bare minimum 3x3 and make sure that you are doing a few approaches at least minimum each time you go out and make sure that you're spreading your approaches over a few days a week if you want to be maximally effective all right so that's the first thing how many approaches you do to do a week and when should you do them that's a rough idea again it's gonna vary from person to person but gives you an idea of the factors that matter next thing is what do you want to do when you're out what do you want to be focusing on and the key element I want to bring to you here is what is your criteria for success how are you viewing a set as a success or a failure and this matters a ton okay so if you of an inappropriate answer to this you're gonna have a really demotivating experience in field and a really uneducated field so let's say for example that you're a beginner to gamer and you set your criteria for success says I have to get later it wasn't a success if you're a beginner and that's your criteria you're gonna go out you're gonna failure after failure after failure and it's gonna be very demoralizing you're not gonna not like game you're gonna not want to go out the next day on the other hand if you're an advanced guy and your criteria for success is oh I did the approaching as a success well now there's no challenge right now it's so boring for you and so easy for you that like you're going to be just going through the motions and probably what you're gonna do is just like leave sets prematurely and take these like moral victories that aren't really helping you to push through your real sticking points and push push through the new challenges you have so basically what I'm talking about from performance psychology standpoint is how to get into flow how to get into a state of flow and you guys may have even heard get in state it's a similar kind of an idea and so here's kind of a diagram for that so think of it as looks like this like pathway of challenges right so if you define your challenge as too difficult right the high ends like it's too high of a challenge well this is going to be frustrating so that's frustration so if you're a beginner and you're saying that you know I have to get later it's not a success you're gonna go out and you're just get failure after failure and you'll be frustrated on the other hand if you're advanced and you're saying well just doing an approach to success well what you gonna end up with here is boredom and if you're either frustrated or bored in game you're not gonna want to go out your brain is gonna disengage you're not gonna learn from the sets you do and your actual performance will dwindle as well because you won't be mentally engaged you won't be present in the sets you're doing but if you're in this nice little range here where it's an appropriate challenge now your brain is going to be engaged and you're going to be getting some successes some failures so each and every set will seem relevant to you on an emotional level each and every set will seem like you know a part of the learning curve and a great example for structuring this is actually if you've ever played video games the way video games are structured all right so you start on level one of a video game and you can barely like move the guy around or move your character around or whatever on the other hand level one's really really easy so you're still experiencing some success very very quickly you may not pass the level you're getting a little further and a little further and a little further eventually you pass the level all right and now you've kind of like maybe not mastered level one but you've got some competence at level one and it's not as challenging for you anymore but then you get to level two and all of a sudden it's a different level of challenge but if level two is way way way too hard you'd probably give up because you'd be frustrated if level two three four and five were exactly the same as level one you probably bored with the game and you'd stop playing it's not interesting to you anymore so it's that same thing you assign the level of challenge to yourself assign what your goal is for the approach or for the night in such a way that you're going to be succeeding sometimes failing other times and you do want to succeed a decent amount of the time because that's encouraging for you and it's more fun to win than to lose so please make sure that you're you're succeeding at least twenty to thirty percent of time at a bare minimum ideally like maybe 50 60 70 percent of the time is a really good amount to be succeeding if you're succeeding 99% of the time you're probably not challenging yourself enough okay so you want to create the appropriate range of range of challenge for yourself decide what your criteria is for success okay so first of all we have how often you're going to go out and win now we have how are you going to focus or what are you gonna like use to motivate yourself drive yourself what goals you're gonna set for yourself when you go out finally we have what are you gonna do for yourself afterwards and this is something that's highly neglected as well so let's look at it this way so you have your core game this is your well it's like a black box right because most of us don't understand within our game exactly all the things that are working all the things that aren't working we have you know our innate behaviors we have the techniques we've learned and it's all kind of thrown together into this like black box right it's a set of things and we don't have all the details on it however there is something that's very measurable which is we go out we'd game and we're gonna get results and buy results I don't mean victories or sex necessarily I mean results a blowout is a result it's a data point all right a success is a result it's a data point of phone numbers a data point whether it flakes are not is a data point so you're getting results all right so you have this black box this sort of like unknown quantity but when you go use that unknown quantity in the world you get results so now you have some insight into that black box you have some insight into what's going on now the next step that most people don't do most people just get the black box and get the results and they learn emotionally they learn by based on what feels good right that's this is how the guy that just gets drunk on weekends and never learn game is he's just like oh well it felt good this week and it felt bad this other weekend and they'll kind of learn haphazardly with no real structure and they probably won't really get much better right they'll eventually learn to avoid massive awkwardness and they'll eventually learn a few things that have worked for them but they're not gonna get a real bust complete idea of game what I want you to do as the thinking for you who are actually studying game in a proper way and when you take your results and take it one step further I want you to come up with a hypothesis and you may have heard this term in science class and there's a reason why because I'm basically applying the scientific method to game but you cope with a hypothesis what is your guess your best like understanding or your best surmise so to speak of why you're getting the results you're getting why are you getting the failures you're getting why are you getting the successes you're getting in particular focus on your most common failure you like the most common place where things are going well things are going well and then it breaks down that's probably the most high leverage thing to look at but what is your hypothesis why do you think that's happening and then what I want you to do is I want you to come up with a suggested change if you have an idea innately from going through like oh I think this is what's going wrong I think this is what I should change great go try it if you don't have an idea if you're lost confused etc that's when it's a good time to come to me or another Authority watch my videos ask me a question anything like that and try and come up with an answer right so there's a lot of pickup Theory out there and there's a lot of solutions so for example say that your hypothesis well say that your result is you're getting a lot of flaking and then your hypothesis is I'm getting flaking because there's not enough qualification well then the change you want to make is to go add more qualification in your game so maybe pick up a video one of my videos maybe on qualification all right or maybe go out and draft some ideas of things you can do to qualify a grow more in your actual approaches all right so hypothesis you're going to make a change and in doing that you will have created a new black box and you still won't have full understand this black box you still have full understanding of everything that's working and not working but you'll be a little bit closer you'll have tweaked it and come a little bit closer than you were yesterday or the day before the day before that and you have to accept you're never gonna have a perfect understanding of this and you're never gonna have perfect game but every single day for getting incrementally closer and incrementally closer and making little improvements along the way you're gonna get to something very very good very very fast now if you do a change and your game gets worse obviously that's a new result new hypothesis to why it got worse possibly throw out the change probably throw out the change and then come up with a new idea but what I'm essentially saying is if you're not examining your results you're learning randomly you're learning based on your emotions and what feels good rather than what is actually you know most efficient and most effective in the real world it's kind of like living in the dark ages before the scientific method when you know people thought that leeches cured every disease because maybe someone you know how to leech on them and they got better and it was a complete coincidence right what I'm asking you to do is actually apply some some analysis and apply some rigor to figuring out exactly what's going on and then make a tiny tweak each time you don't want to make huge tweaks you don't want to make this change changing your entire game because now you're basically throwing out all the previous data and and what you're gonna get back is is gonna be almost useless right so you want to make a tiny change tiny change that's very calculated to make a specific improvement and they're gonna measure one did it change that specific thing I was trying to change right was it effective in that and then two was it effective in making my game better and that's how you're gonna evaluate your progress in your success okay so again to recap how do you get good at game number one go out in the right amounts and the right times right I mentioned minimum three times three again that's a minimum you can definitely go out more all right but you want to be spreading it throughout the week so it becomes a habit you'll be doing at least a few approaches a day so that you're getting that warm-up comment so that you're getting a good sample size for each time you do go out next set goals where you're going to be achieving some success in some failure and so your brain stays engaged you're not bored but you're not overly frustrated if you're finding that you're overly bored or overly frustrated reassess your goals set it up so that you are challenging yourself when you're keeping yourself engaged game is literally game it is one of the most rich most interesting most fascinating games and if you're not mentally engaged by it you're doing it wrong and then finally when you do go out you want to be analyzing what you're doing because if you're not analyzing you're not going to be making improvement or at least not very fast improvement and these all do kind of go together so for example I mentioned doing multiple sessions per week what does it do it gives you as many chances as possible to go through this process if you're doing this one session a week plan you're not going to go through this process but once a week you're going to make a very slow progress if you're going out at least three times a week and you're going through this evaluative process on a regular basis your progress obviously is going to be faster because you're gonna be able to make more tweaks alright so all these things definitely go in hand-in-hand they definitely go together and this complete system it won't guarantee that you're gonna get amazing in a week because that's just not how game works but what it will ensure is that you're making constant incremental progress and that it's reliable and steady all right a big phrase to live by it or a big idea to live by is if you can get one percent better every single day for a year you could actually be 38 100 percent better by the end of the year be 38 times better so the goal is just to ensure that each time you go out you're getting a few percent better if you can do that consistently you're going to be very very good very very fast you

Channel: AskToddV

Views: 188,268

Rating: 4.9410229 out of 5

Keywords: learn, game, practice, scientific method, how to, how much, how often, what to work on, sticking points, process, daygame, nightgame, women, girls, dating, success, system, strategy, plan, gameplan, white board, blackboard, diagram

Id: SipTJ44qhyM

Length: 19min 29sec (1169 seconds)

Published: Thu Feb 28 2019