How is Twitter free? #39

hey uh you up worst takes to wake up - am i right I shoved one of your mice up my ass I can't get it out help you're on your own buddy good luck have fun $2,000 to get some breaks fixed I'm sticking my foot out the car to slow down like I'm riding a bike I've made nearly 100 pounds in two days off my feet I'm buying Gucci a true businesswoman would now go out and buy Gucci slides - then sell up markets more expensive feet picks who would she throw into this uh at this point myself is it just my mom it's your parents not feed y'all no more neither nah you ain't alone I cook my own food now and cook for them too Edwards my dick could literally kill you Bella man I just love tick tock bad boys now what did it feel good so this is how you'll do it in the south hmm what kind of restrooms sign is that ah yes the two genders yee-ha and yee-ha a case the next up we have an uncaptioned image what why she look like an airport and Karis got a scary man like the more I look at this picture the more it resembles and airports next up we have a series of tweets where this guy tries to get a free copy of Minecraft and you're gonna want to see this anyone want a venom owe me $27 so I can buy minecraft sugar daddies I need sugar daddy I need a sugar daddy who will buy me minecraft yeah dude that's never gonna work life's not that easy nothing's free bro but wait this guy gets a message from this dude saying hello cutie I need minecraft okay baby can you tell me about yourself I like Minecraft and I'm nice and I want minecraft and the next thing you know this guy tweets out an image of him playing Minecraft I love Twitter there's 20 19 guys and some of y'all are still seriously paying for video games gel life dude honestly what's your biggest pet peeve I hate being told to go do something that I was already about to do cuz then I don't want to do it anymore financial tip put your debit card in the garbage disposal and then immediately call your bank and ask them to send you another one now you can't spend any money for five to seven business days easiest way to get your girl's ring size without giving up your intentions suck her finger and keep your mouth like that then walk to the store okay so ariana grande tweets out and I saw a picture of herself okay and in this guy replies with a video response miss will you please let me private message you please ma'am I think my uber is lost so this girl tweets out an image of a car captioned she cutes what's a brand-new car and my lunch break what about you damn girl how long is your lunch break but central ps5 yeah on their roaches would have gladiator fights in this never drinking at the bowling alley again huh mad I left my JS but this is high fashion right here ladies and gentlemen if any girl sees a dude out wearing these craps man they're gonna be like marry me I saw my own jacket in my girlfriend's closet and she really had the nerve to tell me you can wear it for a little if you want like what science is fun oh my god this is so cute bro I love nature why are you holding that bug like you about to summon blue-eyes White track in this Twitter gaming tweets out saying wish game launch had thee the most hyped ever Cory in the House Nintendo DS version bruh same stood in line for free days oh that was you cool the midnight release party Wow once a remember this feels like a personal attack he's probably thinking about his other hos I hope she don't wear the feelers today if your tongue is always in your mouth are you always french kissing yourself I'm a pretty much depends on if you've watched face blaziken's kissing tutorial yet or not PSA due to the recent attacks of Popeyes employees by angry customers upset about running out of chicken sandwiches employees will now be packing heat and will straight-up smoke your ass if you get aggressive thank you the Popeyes team markiplier tweet start saying I have to leave the country to anyone I've disappointed I'm so sorry to those that I love I will miss you daily please remember me for who I was and not what I've become when you accidentally say you too when the waiter says - enjoy your meal Reports majority of baseball players swallow up to six baseball's in their sleep per year small Twitter accounts in a nutshell one notifications oh that's sick bro okay maybe not me having an existential crisis in the shower when I should have gotten out twenty five minutes ago this man it smell nobody middle schoolers on snapchat 1111 my boy best friend what am i doing only my besties knows what's wrong nobody hit me up you guys have fake as [ __ ] um I know 20 year old still doing this went to wash my car and realize someone stole my whole ass license plates toughing my nays up what the [ __ ] I can get another one but what weirdo pulled up with a screwdriver and was like screw this guy I'm more baby and took my whole ass license plates just in case you're confused on the baby comment this is why it's license plate look like and then somewhere else and the vast depths of Twitter calm this guy tweets out saying just seeing a guy take a license plate that said I'm baby of a guy's car this world crazy and then in another dark corner Twitter we have this went to Utah and ran off with some dudes I'm baby license plate three hundred and fifty dollars for that plate tap-in wait a minute I recognize him well looks like it's gonna cost this guy $350 to get his play it back glasses or no glasses Phil please delete these I can't lose her again oh my god guys if my girlfriend sees these photos our relationship could be over I'll wait on the minute I don't have a girlfriend my bad this vegan easy guys will post the new chicken sandwich from Popeyes but not the girl they've been with for three years the hardest decision ever um no one phones me nevermind two at the same time what's worse than a heartbreak being mean to your mom and realizing it later it's the simple things man okay so this guy gets a text message from his mom yesterday grandma gave Finn a balloon and it flew away he was devastated I told him it would fly to you and he seemed okay with that I told her he would check with you to see if you've seen it can you photoshop a picture of you holding this balloon Finn would be thrilled either yeah it turns out this kid actually does Photoshop an image of himself with the the missing balloon and as you can see the child is very happy happiness is a lie my friend it's all a lie the balloon is gone walking by yourself at night it's an underrated therapy session women have left the group chat eating lavish for two hundred and fifty dollars what are y'all doing getting full at McDonald's I don't know about you guys but I'd certainly prefer $250 worth of McDonald's compared to whatever this monstrosity is although if I did consume $250 worth for McDonald's I'd probably die speaking of McDonald's Kanye West tweets out saying McDonald's is my favorite restaurants explains a lot next up T few tweets out fortnight's is trash it made you like 20 million dollars Jill why did my friend find a sugar daddy on tinder and this was their text convo hi hey sweetheart I'm glad he texts me how are you doing today good and you I'm blessed can you send pictures and tell me a little about yourself I have pictures on my page yes I know I just want you to send me some one here and then she sent through this picture and then the sugar daddy replies saying ah you look pretty huh you wanna go upstairs me sure huh so uh you have protection me what why what's up there if you ever feel like a freaking idiot just remember Mark Zuckerberg bought Instagram for 1 billion dollars went on the Play Store it was completely free breaking g7 countries have agreed to an immediate 20 million dollars fund to help Amazon countries fight wildfires just for reference boss baby costs two hundred million dollars I just want to spend all my Walgreens reward points on her oh my god where can I find a gentlemen like this my grandma told me she stopped smoking I swear this is the exact reaction I had as a child when my mum would catch me playing Pokemon on my Nintendo DS at 3 in the morning so Satan was alone with naked Eve in the Garden of Eden and all he could do was convince her to eat an apple yeah consent brah consent the best feeling taking pictures of the board's but never actually using them that's better that's crazy relatable man I'm convinced that no student in the history of the human race has ever actually used a photo of a whiteboard in school to help with their homework it's so one of those things you take and you're like yeah I'm definitely gonna use this and then when it comes to doing the homework like five minutes before class you're just like bruh what was the point boycott Steven Spielberg oh my god how could you do this Steven how could you do this I'm never watching another Spielberg movie again hashtag boycott Spielberg so my daughter who's in Mego of 6 teammates decide to get bits and pieces tattooed on her foot as a tribute to her dad's but it was two swords so she got the guide to stop halfway through and this is what she's left with oh yeah that's hard that's real hard baby Nova seriously um he picks free of charge okay the only thing I'm shocked about this is having six teammates to go on holiday with takes three to five working weeks to organize the trip to spoons with my free mates when you ask your boyfriend to buy you tampons do you want the lemon or lime anyways guys that is it for this episode of House Twitter free I really hope you did enjoy and as always don't forget to tag me in your funny tweets at fainted sad on Twitter without you guys this series would be pretty boring honestly thank you so much you guys tagged me in so much funny stuff it's awesome and follow me on instagram at phoenix sad you know what it is baby and i'll see you guys later have an amazing day much love these [Music] [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Fainted

Views: 1,581,518

Rating: 4.9385428 out of 5

Keywords: how is twitter free, how is twitter free?, funny tweets, funny, tweets, funniest tweets, twitter, funniest tweets ever, fainted, How is Twitter free? #39, how is twitter free 39, top tweets, top posts, meme, memes, twitter memes, episode 39, part 39, series, playlist

Id: SgEl0xewkDM

Length: 11min 51sec (711 seconds)

Published: Sun Sep 01 2019