How Is Robert De Niro The Only Famous One There? | Roast Of Alec Baldwin

what the [ __ ] am i doing here [Applause] this is like that moscow hotel room where a bunch of [ __ ] pissed all over donald trump i mean this is what you get for being alex friend on nights like these you expect your friends the people you've worked with closely to show up tina fey tracy morgan thomas the tank engine meryl streep [Applause] not one instead we have a group you can't even find them on wikipedia and and like who are these people i mean who the [ __ ] are you and coulter everybody nikki is what's known as a dirty comedian and i don't mean her material i mean she hasn't washed a [ __ ] since memorial day shawn hayes while you're here over here [Laughter] i was in goodfellas and i'm guessing sean has also been in goodfellas and some bad and more than a few sailors i'm sure caitlyn jenner now there's something different about you but i i can't i can't put my finger in it yes you can yes you can comedy center wanted to have caitlyn on a rose after her surgery so now they can pay her 20 percent less when i did raging bull i had to gain 60 pounds in four months jeff what's your excuse kenda john once stopped his stand-up show to help a woman in the audience who was having a seizure if a seizure is what it takes to stop him from doing stand-up i'm for that and now for the only true movie star on the stage me critics say i have a unique quality as an actor i actually like alec baldwin and i'm happy to be here for alec but honestly i'm here to teach chris redd caitlyn jenner and blake griffin how to fight black women you've starred in huge blockbuster movies alec and now you're hosting a [ __ ] game show i'd say you're about a year and a half away from doing commercials for reverse mortgages one thing i love about alec is that like the subway pizza rat and crazy people fighting over parking spaces he's quintessential new york he is kind of like woody allen except alec only screamed at his daughter and woody well i don't know [Applause] alec i want to thank you for inviting me to do this now rocky and bullwinkle won't be the most embarrassing thing i've ever done and i have to mention alex great portrayal of donald trump on snl he [ __ ] nails it exposing trump for the ridiculous malignant narcissist bully sociopath he is it's not fair though because alec doesn't even have to act to do that alec you're so convincing i want to punch both of you in the face alec you're a good sport and i know i've been rough on you but i also love you and i say that now because like robert kraft and a massage parlor i want my roast to have a happy ending [Applause] [Music]

Channel: Comedy Central Asia

Views: 80,250

Keywords: Comedy Central Asia, Asia Comedian, Comedy, Singapore Comedy, Malaysia Comedy, Taiwan Comedy, asia comedian, malaysia comedy, singapore comedy, roast of alec baldwin

Id: 5PlP8oDzcbA

Length: 4min 39sec (279 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 11 2022