- Ready Mark? Well, you know, it's
the middle of December and we're almost into new year, I was thinking about speaking
today on the topic maybe, you know, when you're in the gang life in the gang style, you
know there's a lotta things that come with it, you know what I mean, there's women, you know, there's money, you know, there's guns, you know there's liars, manipulators, you got all types of them. You know and the thing that I wanted to
talk about today was you know, has a lot to do with the drug trade. You know, I'm not gonna
put no names out there, or any people or where they're at and what kinda drugs nothing like that. But I'm not going to sit here and tell you that I haven't used drugs. I've tried every drug you can imagine. You know what I mean? I've tried them, I've slammed, I've drank, I've smoked, snorted. You know, I tried them all and
there's only one or two that really stuck around for a while. All the rest went like
marijuana that came and went you know, cocaine came and went, crystal meth came and went. But the hard one that didn't
leave was heroin, you know. And heroin catches you up so bad that, you know you hear a guy say, oh, they'd sell their own mama for it. I have seen dudes that will sell anything they have, you know, I ran into people that will give you the title
to their car, you know, let you live in their house you know. One time we ran into this
guy, you know and I remember selling him a 20 on the corner one time, it was in my hood. I was selling a bit of dope. This dude and came and bought
a 20, you know what I mean, and I had never seen him before, but I had heard through the grapevine that the dude had money, you know. So I followed him around the
corner to see what he got in. And he got in a pretty nice car. He got in one of those
Chrysler 300s, you know but it was really nice, you know I'm thinking why's
this dude only buying a 20 when he's driving a
brand new car, you know but as I got to meet the guy, I found out why you know what I mean. Who this guy was, was he was the major drug dealer for like three cities around us. And remember he only came
and bought a 20 off me. So I was like, when I found out about him, I was like why would this
guy only come and buy a 20, and not by a big issue
when he has a lotta money. Well what would he was doing was, he had his feelers out there. I mean, he had a feelers out there. He wanted to know who were
the main one from the hood, who moved the most dope, who had the most juice. You know what I mean? And this dude, he was pretty good. You know what I mean? He used to come and he bought
another 20 the next day. He came again, he started asking about how much was an 8 ball, how much was an ounce,
you know what I mean? And, I didn't give him no
numbers at that time because I really didn't trust the guy you know what I mean, and being
in the dope game, you know, you gotta be careful because you know, some guys will tell you they got a mountain full of dope and all they got is a pocket full. Another fool will tell you
he got a pocket full of dope and he's sitting on a mountain. This dude, I'm speaking of, you know, I'm friends with him today you know what I mean? And he still does the same thing. Now, the first thing he told me about the drug trade was your clientele you know what I'm saying? And this dude, he didn't sell
to nobody under a certain age. I think it was 35, 40. He sold to nobody under
that age and at first I was like, "Whoa, wait up." I'm like 32, you know? And the dude won't sell to anybody over 35 why is he selling to me? Well, I studied the guy, you know, I did my homework on the dude, and I found out that the dude
moved a lotta fucking dope. But he never put his business out there. But the one thing he did do was he did a lotta tests you know, with dope, with money, you know, and as through meeting him, I noticed that he was picking certain people to deal his dope. He had like, he wanted two
women and three men, you know. And this dude he did like 15 years in jail and he had buried some shit he had put it away in the ground in the back in the backyard
of his mother's house. And this dude had been gone for, like I say, maybe two and a half years. And I had heard about him when I was, when I had met him the first time, when I sold him that 20, he had got busted like about a year later. But through that year, he
used to come and he used to ask a lotta questions and I was like, man, I used to be very leery of a person who asked a lotta questions. Because either this dude's a cop, he's either writing some type of book, or doing some documentary or writing anything about the hood, or he's either trying to you know, get some type of movie, some type of skit, or he's just a nosy motherfucker. And I was behind this dude
and I would follow this guy wherever he would go,
because I wanted to know exactly who this dude was. Now I followed him the first time, he went to this expensive
ass hotel he was at. And I watched this dude from the car, me and my homey we got a G-ride, we were watching this
dude with binoculars. We watched this dude for a while you know. And all he had was women going in and out. And I wanted to know who this fool was. And like I said, today he's one of my best friends, you know, but at that time I was really, really leery of this guy because he used to come and buy dope and he used to ask questions and his questions weren't
the regular questions. His questions were more or less like, well how long has that
guy been from the hood? Or how long has he been doing it out here? And that right there made
me pretty leery of the guy. Now, I thought that
the guy was by himself. I didn't know that the guy had one of my homeys
already working for him, one of my homegirls working for him. And he was asking them about me. So I'm out there doing my thing, I'm out there, gang banging and the drug trade. I didn't
really want no part of it because I seen a lotta things
that drugs do to people, I seen a lotta my older homegirls they wouldn't even take
care of their kids. You know what I mean? They leave their house all fucking dirty. You know what I mean? The only time they would be happy is when they were getting
paid on the 1st or the 15th, that's when the offer used
to come in and you know, those were like the
favorite days, you know? And he had one of my homegirls and I remember from seeing her from slamming on the corner. I seen her driving an Escalade, a nice ass apartment. And, I didn't see none of the in between. So I was wondering, how did my homegirl go from here, and get up here? Well, what that dude actually did was he got a hold of my homegirl, he sat her down and he offered her, do you want this? Or do you wanna stay with this? Well, my homegirl, she rised quick because my homegirl was the type of woman that she would do business with you, but if you did her wrong one time, she would never do
business with you again. Now she had got this from this guy, this guy
I was telling you about. She had got these
certain rules that he had because he didn't break
them even for himself. Now, this dude was about 28 years old and man he had nice cars. He had a Cadillac, he
had a Suburban, you know he had some nice ass cars. This was after I found out about him. Now, the reason I'm bringing this up is because it's the drug trade. Stuff can seem this way, but it's actually the complete opposite. You know, when the dude came at me
the first time he tells me, "Hey man how much did you
get for an ounce of weed?" He started off with weed, so I said, well, "Right now they're going
50 or $60 at that time." He tells me, "What if I
give them to you for 25?" I was like $25, an ounce, that's four ounces for every 100. I'm thinking in my head, wait, there has to be a catch
with this because remember, I'm sharing this with the people that haven't gotten involved with drugs, and I hope you don't get involved, but if you do get involved I'm just giving you a few pointers on not who slings it, or who is it, no not like that I'm
trynna give you pointers on be careful because there's a
lotta good times with drugs but then there's a lotta
bad times with drugs, you know and if you get involved with them you have to make certain rules in your rule book because,
you have to keep them there. You know, guys will tell you anything. I've had motherfuckers come
on the street and tell me, man, you know what I mean. Look, man, I got this gold
ring and this gold chain. And I mean, they look
like they were really gold and I ended up giving like a
hundred bucks worth of dope for 'em then when I went to
check them out, they were fake. But yet the guy cruised up with, him driving, his wife sitting
crying in shotgun seat, his kids in the backseat and some car seats, they're crying and dude's telling me he
needs help with some money because he has to drive somewhere
and take his wife and kids they're on the streets
and I felt bad for him. But at that moment, my girlfriend
that was with me tells me don't give him shit he's lying. But from what I was seeing,
the dude was telling me what was happening,
his old lady was crying and shaking her head no, and then his kids were
in the backseat crying. So, I felt for the guy,
I ended up giving him like a hundred bucks and some dope and the fool wasn't hurting at all at all you know, that reminds
me of like three months ago, I was over here talking to this dude, he was on a bike all tore up, he goes down the street, parks his bike in a tent, takes off that coat has a nice shirt under takes off those sweats nice pants under oh a pair of shorts he had
nice pair of short under, took his sweats off and he nice shoes and jumped into a BMW. Now why I'm saying this is because there's actually people that
come over here in downtown and they'll park their car on one block, put some raggedy clothes on, come to the next corner, get their sling on for
maybe five, six hours and then go back to their car, get in it and leave. Now, people do this a lot. You know, and people do this a lot and I've only learned
this through the time doing drugs and being around drugs, I've only learned that
drugs don't give a fuck how old you are, they don't give a fuck who you are, they don't give a fuck man, or woman, child or adult, drugs have no conscience. They have they'll, you give it to anybody, anybody does it. I ran into this guy the other day, he was like about 14 years old. And I ran into him buying heroin. And it struck me hard because you could tell the guy
was only 13, 14 years old. And he had rigs on him, he was hitting dude in the neck, and I was like, man,
this guy's like 13, 14. Where in the fuck did he learn how to poke somebody in
their neck or draw a blood? Where did he learn all this? So lo and behold, I sat down with the guy and this was dude's nephew. The guy that I was telling
you about in the beginning, the guy that was doing big things. This was his nephew way at the bottom slamming heroin, 13, 14 years old and, you know, to these
youngsters out there I give you the solemn
advice not to touch it, because once you touch it, it's very hard to put down. It's not hard to put down
because you can just say I don't wanna do it anymore. No, that's not it. Once you do it for so long and it catches a hold of you, it's like, they call it the monkey. He grabs on your back and he's fucking hard to get off. He's hard to get off. Oh, they got programs. They got methadone, they got sober living, They got the other one where they take you for a week or so, and they bring you all the way down to where you ain't gotta
take anything anymore. You know, a lotta it is helpful,
but it is a crock of shit. You know, a lot of it,
you got people in there counselors that are telling you what it is to do heroin, and they've never even slammed it. They never even picked up a dime to get high on. But yet they're telling
you how to kick heroin. The only one I would listen to was a person who already
used heroin before. You know what I mean? Not nobody who hasn't used it, you know? Cause those people are more
or less textbook smart. They read out of what other
people have written down and their experiences. And then those people go off it. I would rather learn from a person that has already been on drugs, has already been strung out, and been to that point where nothing else matters. You know, when you're strung out on heroin nothing else matters
except your next high. You know, I'm not saying
that guys don't have kids, and there's not guys that are functioning (indistinct) because I ran into 'em where they got their own home, they got a nice job, they got their kids there,
they got their wife. But they slam heroin. They're functioning, heroin users. And I applaud them because it's really really hard
to get a life going and to get a heroin
habit at the same time. I'm speaking from experience. I'm not speaking from something
I heard or read in a book. No, you know, I've been to the point where I had money, but money wasn't the thing. You can have the money, but
if you ain't got the dope you ain't going nowhere. You know what I mean? And I've mentioned the point where I've been to the top where you know, you're high, you know you're up there and slinging big got a nice car, a nice house, a big old flat screen TV, everything in your home. But then I was sitting in front
of the TV and I'm wondering Why? I'm not supposed to have it like this. I would tell myself that I wasn't supposed to have a screen TV, a nice car, a nice woman, a nice bike. Whatever I had, I wasn't
supposed to have nice things. So I was setting myself up from the beginning
because I didn't feel that I could be successful. That's how I felt. I actually felt that I
couldn't be successful. So, when I did sit in there with my nice ass TV in
my nice ass apartment, in the back of my mind my
conscience would tell me I wasn't supposed to have it like this. And a lotta us do that. You know what I mean? When you get a high on drugs, a lotta times you tell yourself well I'm not supposed
to have it like this. You know what I mean? And that's kind of a fucked
up way of thinking because you stunt your growth ,no
matter what you're going and whether you're doing less dope, making you more money, making less money, cutting down your
clientele, whatever it is, you know, in the back of your mind,
you always have that in your subconscious that you are not supposed to have it like this. And I told myself that not once, but several times behind drugs, you know one time I had my own car, I had a nice ass apartment, a nice ass fucking job. And I remember going down the 10 freeway and I was just about to hit, like I was just about to hit like Martin Luther King or
something going downtown. While I was still like
there South central, and I just pulled over to
the side of the freeway turn my car off, turn the radio off and I was just sitting there and I was asking myself why was I right here in life I wasn't supposed to be right here in this part of life. I'm not saying I wasn't
supposed to be right there with the drug trade or the money no, I'm talking about me just
living comfortable, period. I wasn't supposed to live in that fashion. I wasn't supposed to
have those nice things. Because, I guess it was
because most of the money came from dealing drugs. So I bought this, but I didn't buy it like my grandfather or my uncle did it with the sweat off their
bra and off their back. No, I did it where, I just
had to stand in the corner and switch money for dope. You know, and I learned that it didn't matter who came and bought the dope from you because, I used to sell to a guy
that worked at the bank. He was a manager, bank manager and he used to come and
buy crystal meth for me. And he worked four,
five, seven days a week but he used to come and buy meth from me. And this dude used to come
in a suit, nice ass clothes. And I used to be like, where the fuck does this dude work at? So when I finally seen him, I didn't ask him, I seen him at the bank, he see me real quick and
he got kind of nervous, but I told him don't trip, I ain't gonna say shit. But then after I seen him at the bank, I see him outside, you know, down the way, he was buying some dope. And I told him, "Hey, you know, what do you do with that, man you know?" Cause I was interested. Dude works at a bank he's
buying dope off me you know. Of course I'm interested,
maybe we can do something you know, but at the same time, I just wanted to know the
caliber of man that this guy was. This dude had education. He had been to college. He was working as a bank manager, had a nice wife, children. But he had tasted some of
that black dragon that heroin. And it got the best of him. Now I remember seeing him dwindle away, right in front of me. At first he started, getting a piece of heroin and
just sticking it in his nose. That's all he did he just
stuck a piece in his nose and he just let it drain all day. Then he went from that, to squirting it in his nose, then he went from squirting in his nose, he tried something different. He actually got like a patch, he put the heroin on there,
then he would put it on his arm and he would go jogging,
whatever, working out. And he said that the heroin
would soak into his pores. So he went from there, then the last time I seen him he was drawing it up in a rig. But, when he drew it up
in the rig I noticed that he no longer wore his nice attire, he didn't have his hair cut the right way, he didn't look like he was
working in the bank anymore so I had to ask him, you know, "Hey, what happened you don't
work in the bank anymore?" No, well, he got fired
because some money was missing and they blamed him, you know and, I think he
went to jail real quick. And he got out and I'm
looking at this dude from now from day one I seen
him where he would have some nice ass clothes, a nice ass job to the point now where he's about to jump on a bike that's flat. He don't have nice clothes, but yet this is what heroin did to him. You know what I mean? He thought in the
beginning he told me that it was gonna be all fun and games and he just was gonna be able
to feel good, feel no pain, never get sick because
that's what heroin does. You don't feel pain, you never get a cold or flu. I forgot what a cold or flu felt like. When I was getting high on heroin for like three years straight, I never got sick one time. People were all around
me, sneezing and coughing and I wouldn't have to wear a mask, or I wouldn't have to cover myself. It was just that some way heroin blocked off not just that, but it blocked off getting sick. I mean, I even noticed to the point where I couldn't even walk down the street and walk through a patch of roses, I wouldn't even smell the roses. When everybody else walked through there you could smell the roses. Heroin blocks off your sort, your smell, your sense of smell. You could still smell something
bad or still be very strong. But I'm talking about just
walking down the street you know, you got those
purple trees that grow and you can smell that, that purple smell you know, you smell it, it used to smell
like my grandmother's house. But the other day, I'm bringing this up is
cause the other day I walked under those trees and I caught a little scent of what I
was actually supposed to be taking in and breathing, getting the actual smell. But, I read up on it and
it states that heroin takes that part of your senses out. Now, that's just that one I'm not saying they don't
take anything else away but these are for the people that haven't used heroin or that
are barely started using it. You know that thing's
gonna be around your life for a very, very long time. Let me tell you, I have, did
it, stopped, did it, stopped. I mean, it stopped
completely for five years, didn't even take an aspirin, not even an aspirin. I wanted no drugs in my body. No aspirin, Tylenol, weed, nothing. And to be honest with you, those five years, I could say were probably the
best five years of my life. Because drugs were not a part of me. You know, I had that nice ass car that I paid the loan every month, I had that nice three
bedroom apartment by myself. You know what I mean? I had nice clothes. You know, the women they were
still kind of the same, but different friends. You know what I mean? I had different friends. I didn't run with the same crowd. And I didn't think that I was any better, but I noticed at times if I seen you on the streets
and you were getting high, I would just say here, and I
would leave, I would avoid you. But if you weren't getting high, I would keep you on part of my team. And this is you and my team. You guys that didn't get high. I remember one time my cousin asked me when I was deep into the
game, my cousin asked me Hey man, let me get a part
of that action you know. And I told him, do you, I
asked him, do you get high? And he's like, yeah. I said, well then here, you know you can't get
a part of this action. He threw that in my face,
like about three years ago. I remember when I asked you if I could work with you and you said, if I get high
that I had no part of it. I said, yeah, I had to apologize because I didn't feel that I was any better than anyone that used drugs. I just didn't want anybody
around me that used them because I know me if I seen it and it was the
right time I would do it. And then from that point on, it would just be a roller coaster ride. I couldn't just use it and stop, use it
and stop that wasn't me. I had to use it, buy more, use it buy more and then sell it to buy more. You know, and that was my thing. And when my cousin do that in my face, I kinda felt guilty and kinda bad because I was at the same position he was at many times. And I remember when I had
asked people the same thing and they shot me down when they were shooting me
down for the same reason that I shot my cousin down. Just recently, I have a homey that he does skits and he does parts in Hollywood. He works for Suspect Entertainment. Now that's his whole hookup there, that's all him. And I'd heard through my other homeys that he was getting guys you know, to do, you know come out in
movies and do different shit. And I thought, man, you know maybe I could get a piece of that action. And maybe I can, you know
put my face on the screen and you know, speak to somebody. But when I got to my homey, that was the first question he asked me, that was the first question. He's all, "Do you get high?" And I was gonna tell him no, but I wouldn't be able to
hide it in front of him because he doesn't get
himself he never has. In all the years, I've known him, and he's been through my, in
my hood since I was a kid, he's been a kid he's
never, ever used drugs, that wasn't his thing. But when he, asked me that
question, if I use drugs, cause I asked him about,
you know, his movie thing. When he asked me that I was
gonna lie to him and tell him, nah, I don't fuck around. But it woulda been too hard because he would've found out
I was fucking around, then I would have been deep in this deep in a spot with him, and he's the type of individual that you don't wanna get
in no kinda situation with. He's just that type of motherfucker. Now, when he asked me that I
told him, "Yeah I get high." He said, "Well, let me know when you don't get high anymore and you could come work for me." Now I've seen his skits, I've seen parts on music
videos that he's did, you know, and he's pretty good you know, also seen him speak for 30
minutes on eyewitness news, they had this kind of half an hour special and he was on there. I also seen this little like movie he did on YouTube and he's pretty good,
you know what I mean? I like his stuff and I would
never hate on my homey. But, the only thing is that if you get high you
can't be no part of him. And it's kinda hard for me to believe that every individual I see
on that screen with him, they all don't get high? That's just hard for me to believe. But to each his own you know, and that's a part of the drug game that if you're getting high, if I wouldn't have been getting high, I probably woulda had action with him, I probably would have
been making big money, but yet I chose to get high because in the beginning when
I first started getting high, oh, it was fun. Prison was fun. Jail was fun. Everything was fun. But now that I got older, a lot of it's a crock of shit. I mean, I go to jail now
and I don't see one person, that I know from jail not one guy. Before when I used to go to jail, oh man, I knew everybody in there. I know everybody from the streets, from different parts of jail. I knew all gang of guys in there. Now I go in there and I
don't know a soul in there but I got this 18 year old kid telling me to be quiet, not in that
fashion, but more or less, you know, shut it down, put it on quiet, and that means shut up in other words. And, I know the 18 year
old kid ain't been nowhere. He got a deep ass voice with
a little body, but he's, that man in that seat and for me to sit back and just allow him to dictate my program when he hasn't even been to a real program, the guy hasn't been nowhere. Not saying he's a bad guy, but I think always somebody who
has a seat of authority, should have some type of knowledge of what he's doing you know what I mean? And I share that with the people that are gonna get involved in drugs, because when you get involved in drugs, there's one thing that's
gonna come for sure, jail. You know, I find it hard to believe that there's someone other that
can sell a gang of drugs and not get high on them themselves. You know what I mean? It's hard to believe because I've seen every kind of
drug dealer imaginable. Dude on the corner, I seen a dude in, we
called it the mini mansion. This fool actually had white house pillars in front of his house. You know what I mean? And this guy was a straight white guy, no tattoos, no hardness to his look. But in reality, he was
a stone motherfucking solid ass motherfucker. He didn't take shit from nobody. But his appearance threw you off. You think, I'll rob this guy, no, he'd be the last
motherfucker you wanna rob. You know what I mean. His house was nice I mean, he had white house pillars in the front, He had a pool table in his den. You know, this dude had it going on and all he used to do, was pick up something for somewhere and drop it off somewhere else. He never ever touched anything, he never ever lined anything up, or sold, nah, that's all he did. And you know that type
of drug dealer, you know. My grandfather told me one time, do you think you're a drug dealer? Where's your truck load of dope at? When you roll up with a
truck semi full of drugs, then I'll say you're a drug dealer because a real drug dealer
has a fucking mansion, has a fucking army with him, and has truckloads a dope. A guy that's slinging fifties
or hundreds on the street, he's not a dope dealer, he's just what you call a connection. You know, and there's a difference between being the connection and being the main dope dealer. There's a big, big difference. If you wanna call yourself a
dope dealer and you're balling well then you have to drive a semi up full of your dope and then you're balling. I 'll actually say you're balling. You know, my little brother
used to always ask me when he used to sell dope. When we were in the gang
and she used to ask me, "Am I balling bro?" "Am I balling?" And I used to tell him nah, nah. And then one time he asked me, "Hey, am I balling?" And I said, "Look, you'll be balling when I see you turn that
corner in a Hummer." Three months later, I'm
in my hood kicking it, and the Hummer turns the corner. And my little brother gets off it, He comes around and he
tells me, "What's up bro?" "Am I balling?" And I told him, "Yeah, yeah." "Now, now, yeah, you
can say you're balling. You know, he was driving a Hummer. You know? And my brother's only
a year younger than me, but he approached it in a different way. You know what I mean? He approaches things in his own fashion. You know, he wants no part of anybody. He don't wanna get involved with nobody. It's just him, pay his dues, but he always keeps to himself. You know what I mean? And he's been in jail so many times, been caught with so many
guns, but never a clip. And I didn't know that you
can get caught with a gun, If you didn't get caught with a clip they'll let you out the next day. But if you get caught with the clip they ain't gonna let you out in a while. I barely found this out
you know but that was just, you know, asking information. You know what I mean about different shit you know, because if your
lifestyle is a certain way, my best advice is, find out what comes with
that type of lifestyle. Because like I said, with drugs only comes heartache and pain, suffering, you know what I mean? Sometimes, you're so fucking hooked on it that you want it so bad that you go to desperate measures. You know, you got, with all due, respect you
got women out here and men that sell themselves not three blocks away from where I kick it at. And I've always wondered in my mind, I understand how a prostitute does it. But what happens if the
ugliest, sickest, smelliest person comes and has a gang of money and wants to sleep with you and you got to sleep
with them for that money. I couldn't lower my standards
that low and do that and still could feel
comfortable with myself. And I asked the prostitutes
that question before. What happens if this big
old fat greasy motherfucker comes with pimples on his back and he wants you to kiss him and shit. What do you do? And she told me that you just do what you gotta do. And I was like, I can't understand that you know what I mean because at that point I would say, wait up man I'm not fucking putting
my hands on this person. Not saying everybody's ugly, or everybody's handsome as fuck. I'm just saying there is a certain line that I don't cross. In the younger department
that's just the way it is. You know what I mean? But when I ask these
prostitutes on the streets when I was dealing drugs, that's what they told me that you just gotta do what you gotta do. You know? And I didn't understand that, you know, prostitution
ain't like selling drugs. You're selling your body not something you can have in your hand. You know what I mean? And I mean, I've slang for marijuana, cocaine, heroin, guns, I've slang it all. And all of it has brought
me the same thing. Either I go to prison for
more than five more years, or I'm hooked on drugs,
really, really fucked up. And don't get me bad
at, I'm not looking like some hobo or some bum on the streets but, I'm not looking as well up to par. Up to par is where I mean
where everything is nice, your shoes, your pants, your shirt, your hair everything's combed right. And you're dealing drugs. You know what I mean but
like I said, you know, if you're a real drug leader then you have to be a real drug dealer. You can't sit on the
corner and move twenties and say your dealing drugs
because the fact that, like I said, I seen them all. I've had my brothers, my uncles,
my sister, and my brother. All my family members have been through their little drug thing. You know either they
were strung out on drugs or they were moving drugs. And sometimes drugs is so fucked up where it doesn't even matter if
it's your family member. Even if your family member has the dope and you're hurting and you need some, they're gonna tell you, no. My family members have
shot me down many a times. Nah, and I'm getting mad like, "What the fuck, what do you mean?" "You're my family member,
you're not just gonna leave me sick are you?" Hell yeah, they would, because that drug becomes more important than anything else. And this is straight
from my family members. You know what I mean? And a lotta times I did the opposite and brought my family members in. Wrong thing, wrong thing. You don't wanna get involved with drugs and your family at the same time. Because you're family member always has that upper hand on you where they're like, well, what about, they mentioned their
kids or their old lady. So, you get that soft spot for them. But now if you hire your enemy or someone you don't really like, they're gonna do their job to par because they're trying to prove to you that they can be the same place you're at, you know what I mean? And I learned that through the years of being in a drug trade that you would rather have your
enemy sell drugs for you than your closest friend. Cause your closest friend
is always gonna have excuse. And your enemy's not going
to look for an excuse because they don't wanna
look any weaker in your eyes. And I've had them both. You know what I mean? And I've seen that before because my homey's dealing for me, I know his wife and everything. And every time he would
come show with the money he would bring his wife up, but she was sick with cancer. So he'd bring her up, so I had that soft spot for him, but yet I had a dude dealing for me that I had beat up before, he was never late with his money, he never had an excuse. And I used to wonder
why is this motherfucker never fucking up? Well what it was is he never wanted me. He never wanted me to see him, fuck up or for him to ask
me for anything because he really didn't like me. But yet that was the guy I
wanted to keep close to me. You know like the guys I fuck with today. I've got in a fight with
them like two or three times. They either stabbed me or I stabbed them. And they're the closest
motherfuckers to me right now. Some people would think, man that's kinda crazy, but no, the lifestyle that I live, I would rather have a motherfucker that I know would stand up to
me and wanna fight with me, then to have a motherfucker on this side, that would bow down to me and
give me up when the time came. I would rather have
the motherfucker that's in the same spot with me. I know that if we get back to back and we're handling our business that, I don't have to turn around
and look for this guy because he's right there because
he's not gonna let me see him sweat, get beat up or come short. And I learned that in the drug game, you have no friends. Yeah, you might be able
to bump a motherfucker, oh, this is my dawg. No, he's not. No, he's not. None of these motherfuckers
are your friends. You have no friends in the drug trade. You trust nobody. Sometimes I can barely
trust myself doing anything. You know, Why I speak about the
drug game is because, with gangs comes drugs, there's never just gangs and no drugs or drugs and no gangs. No, they run hand in hand. Maybe you wanna be that guy that picks up the sack
and get your sling on. And don't wanna be involved in the gangs, It's impossible because they're gonna come and wanna know where you're
dealing on their street. And when they come, you know,
they've come a lotta times and asked me when I was younger, hey were here doing this, this. I'm just living. I ain't living beyond my means, which means, you know you're driving a Cadillac
living in a shack. No, I'm talking about, they say sometimes you know when I used to go approach
people and ask them about their drug trade, because I was in that seat to ask 'em. I used to ask them but already know exactly what they were doing. Cause I wanted to see what type a person they were. You know, if they was to come
out straight and tell me, look, I'm moving ounces, I can give you. Okay, and they was, they were doing. Well then most of them
I wouldn't even come, I would miss a week with them every month just because they were
honest in the beginning. But then you got those
other motherfuckers, Oh, I ain't got shit dawg, I ain't got nothing. And they're selling ounces for $500 a wop and they're moving like 15 a day. You know so, you know, you also run into people in the drug trade like that. They act like they ain't got shit, but they got a whole lot of it. And then, you know what really strikes me, the hardest inside is, when people use heroin, you just go to a corner, buy a balloon, put in a cooker, cook it and slam it. You don't even know what's in
that motherfucking balloon. You don't even know if the
dude put poison in there or if it's bad dope,
and it's gonna kill you. You know, we never ever think of that. I remember so many times I grabbed stuff out of people's hand and went and did it, without even checking in with it without even seeing if it was good or if it was bad, you know. Once you put rat poison in
your veins, you're dead. I've run into many, many people and went to their funerals behind them overdosing on fentanyl,
overdosing on heroin or just getting a hot shot. But, they were so easy
to get a hot shot because 9 out of 10 people would just grab the dope outta hand and go fix it. Without even knowing what the
fuck actually is in there. You know what I mean? And it's very, very hard, the drug game is very, very hard. I would rather tell you right now in front of camera to get a job, because the fact that being in drugs is so hard. It's a fucking hard ass job. First of all, you gotta find the shit. Second of all, you gotta
make sure it's not bunk. Third of all you gotta make sure the dude ain't gonna burn you. Most of all, you're watching for the cops. You know what I mean. Who knows how fucking far
you went to pick it up. You might live all the way in Norwalk and go all the way to
Pacoima me to get it. It took you all day to go up and back, but you wanna be involved in drugs. It's a very, very hard game. It's so hard that it just
don't take parts of your mind, it also takes parts of your life. You know what I mean? It cost me seven years in prison one time, four years another time
and to tell you the truth, all that getting high, it didn't sum up to those four years I spent in prison. Without spending time
with my kids or my family, I spent time in prison behind getting caught with a 20 of glass know 20 of glass I went
and did seven years. Where dudes were getting
caught with three guns and only getting five years. And I was like today, if you go and you get caught with the 20 of glass, you know what they do, they give you a ticket and let you go right there on the spot. But yet they gave me seven years of 80% for the same amount of
drugs I got caught with and they Pat me on my fucking
hand and say, leave, you know? So, you gotta be careful with the drug game because gangs are gonna come with that. And you might not want to
get involved with the gang. But once you start selling that first shit on the corner, you only digging yourself a deeper hole to where these guys are gonna
come get at you and ask you, hey what are you doing? How much you moving? Because, you're on their block. They might not own it
through the government, but yet that's their block because they're on there all night and day. And, don't think you're
just going to sling and they're not gonna come
and you're gonna get involved. I've seen many, many,
many guys that sold drugs, and then I see them down
the line and they hit me up asking where I'm from and
I'm like, wait the fuck up, I know who this dude is. And he's from a gang already. How did he get involved with that gang? Behind the drugs and the money. Not behind anybody putting in work because they let motherfuckers in gangs now that just make money, fools
that know how to make money. You got dudes out there, I ran into a guy that told me, oh man you got guys that can kill, and you got guys that make money. I'm the type of guy that makes money. Whoa, okay. I ain't fucking with that guy because he left the other part out. He, ain't no type of good motherfucker. You know, (indistinct) put it in no work. He's just gonna make money. So that means when it gets thick, he's gonna give me up. You know what I mean? And you gotta watch that because you know they got people out here working for the police that all
they do all day long, is go buy drugs from people
and then tell the police where the drug spots at. And I've ran into those people before. You got homegirls out here that they'll give you oral sex
for five fucking dollars. You know so, it's somebody's mother, it's somebody's sister,
it's somebody's wife. You know what I mean? I ran into girls out here that I'm kicking, I'm partying with them. And then somebody drives up in a car and he's balling and everything, and he's talking about, hey
nobody let this girl get hurt cause I'll come back. And I'm looking at like, who is she? I knew who he is, but who is she? A minute ago I was looking
at her like a piece of meat. She just out of, whatever, giving fucking oral sex for what? But little did I know this is this dude's little sister out there. Now he's trying to get her
to go home in front of us. She ain't going nowhere. She's stuck. She's stuck on the crystal meth. She ain't going nowhere. She's not going to leave. And, I remember when she got there, oh man she was beautiful fine as hell. Now she's been there two months and her clothes barely fit her. She's pulling her pants up cause she needs a belt. I remember when she was
thick as fuck, fine as fuck. Now I look at her, I wouldn't even touch her
with anybody else's shit. You know what I mean? And it's fucked up because that's what I see drugs do to people. For being out here for five years, I seen motherfuckers either
go from here to up here. They're living in a tent, and then a year later they're up there in one of those lofts that
cost like $3,000 a month. And they never ever come down again. See those are the ones that
I trip are the ones that, they're right there with you and then they come up and make a step and then they get put up
there in one of those lofts and you never see them again. You know they're up there
cause you hear they're up there but they never come down. And I always, I always trip on that because I go over there a lot and I'm like, Hey what
happened to so-and-so? He's up there. And what about, so-and-so? He's up there. What, they never come down? They never ever come down. They stay up there. You forget they're around. You know what I mean? And I just was asking one
of my homeys recently, I thought he was busted all this time I thought he was in jail. No, he's been up there
in one of those lofts and he doesn't move. He doesn't come down and
put nothing in your hand. He's up there doing the bigger things. You know what I mean? Up there sitting, watching
all his shit, go on. Now, if you get that high, ey more power to you. But with being that high, comes multiple, multiple problems because everybody wants
to kick you out that seat. Or everybody wants to sit
in that seat you have. No matter how much dope you move, how many people you had to handle. You're at a certain spot, there's always one or two
motherfuckers that want your spot. They want your spot and
they're coming to get it. No matter what the cost is, whether it costs them their life, or you their life, they want your spot. Now, isn't really your spot? I mean, how did you make your spot? You have to look at how long it took, how many people you had to have with you, or how many people fell through the way where you got your spot. You have to remember along the way you made a lot of enemies, and along the way, a lotta
motherfuckers are jealous, they have envy, you know what I mean? They wanna see you fall, you know, you can get up to this high and then they got that crab in a bucket scenario. They're just going to pull you back down. You know, I used to trip because there used to be guys that tell me, oh man, I'm getting out next week, dawg. I've been down for five years. As soon as I get out, my homey's gonna put a pound
of dope in my hand and a strap. And that's your homeboy? Really ask yourself, is
that really your homeboy? He didn't say, hey homes here's
the keys to an apartment, here's a car dawg, you know, get a job and
help me pay the rent. No, he's, here's a pound., here's a gun, go ahead and go back to jail. Now, is he really your homey? Some guys might think that's my homey dawg he looked out tough. Then you got the man on the other side that'll say, wait up this motherfucker wants to
see me go to jail again, cause it doesn't matter how much dope he's gonna give you. He's giving it to you for a reason. Most of the time he's
giving it to you because he knows you're not gonna get burned. You're not going to get got. So if you don't get burned
or you don't get got that means he's not gonna get burned, he's not gonna get got. You know, you think, oh, I'm
the one doing all the work, yeah, you are. He's just sitting up there collecting the money you're bringing. And you're the one doing all the work. You think you're shining? No. In everybody else's eyes, he's shining. You're just helping him keep shining. That's all you're doing. You know, I used to think, man, I'm up here, I'm dealing pretty good. But there was always a
motherfucker above me. And, he was taking all the credit for all the work I was putting in. You know and you have to remember that there's always levels to
being involved in drugs. You got to user, to the dealer, to the mover, to the pusher, you got the fucking fool who drops it off. You got so many different
levels of drug dealing that people only think there's one or two. The guy who buys and the guy who sells. Fuck no, no. There's levels, on everything it's just as you rise higher in dealing drugs, you see what level there is because you're on that level. You just move level by level. Believe me at any given time you can drop all the
way to the bottom again, just for one fucked decision. You know, we make thousands
of decisions a day but only takes one decision
to fuck everything off. You know, and I've known, I've been to, I had 15
motels on Whittier Boulevard all the way down Whittier Boulevard 15 motels on both sides of the street. I used to go drop off the dope everywhere and then come back two days
later and pick up all the money. And I thought I was doing big things. Hell no, the guy that I
was picking it up from and giving the money. Now he was doing big things. I was just the one running
around taking the chances. What we call prison chances. And you take prison chances
with dope all the fucking time. You mean go ahead and get
caught with some acid. See how they break your ass off. Go ahead got caught with a lotta fentanyl, see how they break you off. When you can go with
your ID down the street and buy some marijuana out of a shop for 30, 40 bucks with your ID, this one over here you gotta buy on the low, low, but this one you can buy in front of everybody
and walk around with it in a big old plastic, broadcasting that you got some marijuana. You know, it's just, it's a
real trip because I remember when we used to hide smoking marijuana. the smell and everything, we hide, you know me trying to blow the smoke away. Now, you can go like it's the liquor store and buy marijuana you know what I mean? But yet, you got guys sitting in prison doing 10, 15 years for a
couple of pounds of marijuana. When you got these dudes
over here and making 10, 15,000 for just pushing the out of a dispensary they call it. You know, and I've got
a lotta opportunities. Guys, tell me, ey, come in man, come in just put your money in and we'll get a dispensary going. I've seen so many dispensaries go down. I've seen dispensaries where they're just there. Guy just gets a place,
sets up a gang of weed, and he ain't got no
permission to do it, nothing. He's just moving, moving, moving, moving boom until they crack him. But everybody in there knows, if the cops come, we're busted. But do you wanna work for me? Cause he's paying a good price. But yet if you get cracked, all that bud that's there is going on you. And a lotta guys are
willing to take that chance. Me before I was willing
to take that chance when I was younger because jail didn't mean shit. I'll go do it and get right out. But now that I'm a little older, Jail means just a little
bit more to me now because, before it was fun, before you got there and your homeys had tobacco and coffee, soups
for you and everything, everything you needed. Now you go, they ain't
got nothing for you. All they're asking is
what you brought for them. The other way it was the other way around. When you got to jail they used
to bless you with everything, shoes, clothes, to eat, to smoke. And it was all good. Now, you can't even
ask a guy for a fucking Top Ramen which is 25ยข out on the streets. He'll have a problem just giving you that. That's how bad jail has changed. When I went, it used to be all older dudes with big ass whips,
tacked up, swole as fuck. Now I go, there's maybe like
three or four older dudes and the rest are all youngsters, shut the fuck out. Dude's trying to tell you, hey man, you need to work out today. And he hasn't even did a push
up in the last five months. You know, that's the kind of morale, that's the kind of
people you got in jail now. They don't, go by respect
and honor anymore. They go by, how much money
you got in the streets, how fast you can get money
to some of these books. You know, I just shared that with you because I wanted to share a
little bit about the drug trade It ain't all what it seems. Before you take that step and wanna get involved in this shit. Like I tell you all the
time, do your homework. First see what you're really
getting involved with. Is it really worth it? Cause Imma tell you before anybody (indistinct) can tell you you're gonna lose your life, all your loved ones, your respect, your honor, everything
goes in and it's tied up and thrown to the side. Why? Because drugs is more important. A dude will wanna get his money before he can wanna help you. I just wanted to share that today. You know Mark that, that's the drug trade. It all bottles up to absolutely nothing, it's illegal for one, number two when you get caught with it, the closest fools are gonna give you up. The motherfuckers you
thought had your back. No, they been working with the cops all along. So I shared that today, man, if you're gonna get involved in drugs, do your homework on it first, because you don't really
want a part of that shit. I don't, you know? It's cool Mark.
