Fire Fighters, When Did You Have to Help a Stupid Person?

fire fighters of ridic what's the dumbest person you had to save in a stupid situation i was a volunteer firefighter many years back one summer after a long period of no rain two good old boys decide to have a few dozen beers and take their jeep into a nearby field to go off-roading well two featuring tall corn stalks that are bone dry wind up getting jammed up into the undercarriage which on a 90-plus degree day turns out to be hot enough to ignite a fire the owner of the field sees the situation unfolding from their house and calls for fire and police given the proximity to my location i go directly to the scene after hearing the page go out and see these two buttholes trying to drive the jeep faster and faster to put the fire out eventually the engine gives out but they won't leave the car i physically had to reach in burning my arms in the process since i didn't respond to the station first to get my turnout gear and pull them out somehow they decided that remaining in the car would slow down the flames and because they thought it was a good idea to continue driving a burning vehicle around a dry field we now have a significant brush fire and have to call mutual aid from another county to help douse the fire state police get involved i have a nice trip to the hospital and buttholes lose their jeep and the remainder of their booze obligatory not a fireman but they were most definitely involved i used to work in a nyc public grammar school over the summers to pay for college back in the 90s and one of the full-time employees was a nice guy but stupid and i don't mean he was slow or anything he just did dumb crap because he was careless one time he loaded up a trailer with like 25 gallons of gas and was driving it back through the main school parking lot he didn't realize that container cracked open and spilled all 25 gallons in the parking lot he didn't want to get in trouble so he thought the best way to get rid of the evidence was to set the gas on fire he didn't realize that burning gas gives off a lot of black smoke and a gigantic cloud of black smoke coming from a skull generally attracts a lot of attention from first responders panicking he tries to put the flaming lake of gas out by driving over it with his car with a fire department gets there screaming at him to stop driving his car through flaming gasoline they finally get the fire out and just screamed at this guy for like 25 minutes it was the funniest thing i've ever seen i was the dumb call my cat got her poor stuck under the dishwasher and was screaming bloody murder i couldn't move her poor and i couldn't lift the machine so i sat with her while my husband called the fire department she chewed right through one of my favorite blankets in her stress firefighters arrive not in full suits but heavy boots and pants soon as they came around the corner to the kitchen our cat miraculously was able to free her poor and take off to hide in the bathroom the guys seemed confused but at least it was easy we thanked them profusely for being scary enough to free our cat who had zero physical damage not even a broken claw i guess she'd hooked her claws on something and didn't want to let it go for love or money not me but dad was a firefighter in nyc and once responded to a call at a chinese food restaurant where the owner's walkway was iced over he apparently didn't speak very good english and maybe misunderstood the job of a fireman genuinely don't know they sorted down his front walkway for him and explained that this was 100 not their job they all had a good laugh and the guy gave them all free egg rolls ppl always used to ask him questions about crazy calls and he never enjoyed talking about that so he would always tell that story happened in 1999 still makes me laugh to this day 20 years later eta if you plan on commenting something along the lines of 20 years ago z-omg i'm old screw you for reminding me i assure you roughly 40 other people have already beaten you to the punch i get it 99 doesn't feel that long ago let's all move on lol it's interesting that that's what so many people took away from this story obligatory not a firefighter but recently in san diego a group of suburban moms decided to take their infants up the local hiking spot called cows mountain it's not a particularly grueling hike as many children and elderly people can do it however there is a heat stroke warning posted at the trail head not to mention it can get pretty hot here and this last week was no exception with temperatures exceeding 90 degrees while these idiots took their infants up in this heat the trail is pretty exposed and due to its easy accessibility and instagram worthiness lots of inexperienced hikers flocked to it many times with little to no water because they underestimated how hot and difficult it could be needless to say the fire department ems and chopper were all called as these moms had taken their babies up and were too tired and exhausted to come down they had to go up and give water check their conditions and some even carried the babies down i know fires are a lot hotter but i bet they were cursing out these moms in their heads as they had to hike up the mountain in pretty much full gear but the moms came strolling down laughing and flipping off the cameras as they were angry people were going to see their stupidity this happened all because they wanted to take a group photo with their infants on a mountain on a hot day two kids and two infants i was on a backpacking trip through some national parks a couple years ago and we were repeatedly shocked by how little water most people were carrying like you're in the middle of the freaking desert and we'd see people with no pack just holding a 20-ounce bottle of water meanwhile i've got 3l in my pack and an extra 750 milliliters bottle just in case fire department and the paramedics had to come to my work one day because some kid didn't know the difference between a swimming pool and a splash pad there's this artificial waterfall that goes down into a basin that's only about two inches deep where there's fountains and stuff for kids to play in this kid decided to climb up the waterfall there are multiple signs posted not to do this and decided to dive off into the water below that again is only two inches deep luckily the kid landed flat on his face so he survived and avoided being paralyzed but he was knocked out cold immediately and would have probably drowned but luckily his mother heard the splat and came running over screaming and pulled him out and for my next trick i shall die from the roof onto this damp sponge not a firefighter but emt also my friend's story dude was spending some alone time and wanted to stimulate himself i guess he didn't have a traditional dialed so he used the handle end of a whisk the problem was that the whisk had a ball on the very end of it handle was a normal cylinder tube with a ball on the very end went in just fine but he couldn't pull it out himself apparently when they got the call he didn't tell them what was going on just that he had got something stuck they got there to see a whisk hanging out his butt apparently the whole thing just made everyone laugh but the poor dude was freaking out and in pain from trying to pull it out he also apparently tried to give it a few good tugs which probably didn't help took him to the hospital where they gave him relaxer and lubed him up austin tx head circa 1990 a little girl needs to use the toilet she locks the door manages to get onto the toilet and use it all by herself she's a big girl after all but the toilet is tall and getting down is scary better wait for mom to come help except she can't get in because the little idiot locked the door and is too scared of the five inches from her feet to the floor and so just sits there crying while sitting on the toilet the firemen break down the door and the little girl is saved god dang i was a stupid kid edit oh boy this blew up i'll try to answer questions i was asked and provide clarification so y'all can stop asking i was really little guys like three maybe four this was a single use bathroom not the one with stalls so when i locked it it was an actual door i don't recall which specific head but probably riverside or seventh saint why didn't they use a key or unscrew the door good question not something i asked at the time of course but when i was older i thought the same things and shrugged it off as someone had to have tried that it wasn't possible for one reason or another so they called the firemen the plot twist though not a firefighter but my uncle used to be one he told me a story about a person he was training to become a firefighter said person didn't follow protocol regarding belts that they had to fasten around their bodies when the person was performing a drill that involved getting suspended in air a loose part of the belt caught his testicle as he was mid-air with all his weight crushing it my uncle got him out of there and he had to go to the hospital as a tradesperson who occasionally wears a full arrest harness this is one of my worst nightmares and i make sure to spend all the time i need adjusting and shifting my harness around to make sure the boys are safe if i do fall costco company policy now requires that all safe's cabinet ctcb locked closed on the display floor because of this little genius in my hometown who locked himself in none of the employees had the key or combination and apparently 911 is faster than a locksmith we cut the hinges off with a circular saw scared the crap out of the kid but he was fine it was saturday so we snagged a few free samples on the way out all in all a good day we rescued another kid out of a stuffed animal game at the fair once too the kid climbed up through the trap door trying to reach the toys and got stuck that was a fun one too i was a volunteer with a rural department in the foothills of appalachia in a very small college town like roughly 1 500 students and about 500 locals every year we had drunk students fall off the side of the relatively gentle sloping mountains around campus these falls were rarely fatal or even likely to cause serious injury one of the frats had a big formal and we got the call that someone had wandered off from the party and couldn't be found this is just before cell phones started to be everywhere and cell phones didn't work very well around campus anyway turns out it is a guy in my class who i know pretty well we go out in the woods looking for him and here groaning down the side of one of the drop offs not a far drop about 15 feet but sheer sides and no way to walk out i personally have climbed down this little gully before and climbed back out it is not difficult but this guy can't get it together and has no idea where he is so we have to get the high angle rescue truck to drive out there with all our ropes and the backboard and other crap then we have to get all rigged up using the appropriate anchors and systems that we were required to use in any high angle rescue situation then we have to drop down there and try to backboard this drunk butthole the whole freaking time he fought us on it i'm sitting there trying to explain hey man it's me your buddy you know me let me help you freaking guy kept lurching away from us taking swings and rolling off the board whenever we finally got him on it it took half of the small undermanned fire department all goddamn night to get him out like he literally had time to sober up enough to become cooperative i suppose that's not much of a story but it's funny because i still give him crap about it to this day whenever i see him just an incredibly frustrating needlessly difficult situation not a firefighter but former paramedic ironic that my best story for this is not one from in the field but it's from the air i was working a shift in a busy trauma center because i was an instructor for a paramedic program and i had paramedic students doing clinical rotations through the air a patient came in with a weight from a weight set stuck to his dong he had tried to have conjugal relations with the center of a weight that you would put on a barbell i hope i'm using the right term but probably not the fit was such that arterial pressure allowed fluid to enter to the end of the dong but the lower pressure venous return meant that blood stayed trapped in the dong creating a dong balloon and also a dong that wasn't going to be separated from the weight any time soon i don't remember how heavy the weight was i only remember it was big and red insert that's what he said joke here so the guy shows up in the air on his own but before surgery is undertaken the air dock wanted to see if the fire depths could cut through the weight with some of its heavy rescue equipment used to cut people out of wrecked cars so 911 was called i don't know much about those weights but i guess they're made of cement sometimes and none of the hydraulic equipment the fire department tried could cut off the weight one of my friends was on the crew that responded and i got to hear all about it as we were all ushered out of the room during the actual cutting attempt so attempts to cut fail and we prep the guy for emergency surgery i'm sure we're the urologist but it was over 20 years ago so i don't remember for sure i do know that the surgeon told the adopt that the man would probably be impotent for life when dongs get stuck in things that cannot be removed they have to cut splits into the dong to relieve the pressure by draining the trapped fluid this may or may not leave the person with permanent impotence but in this case it was pretty certain that would be the result tl dr don't stick your dong in things that are solid and could trap it you may be risking impotence for life my friend's former roommate was a firefighter i describe him like this and not as my friend because he's actually a total dong but he's still a firefighter so he saves lives anyway i was over at their place one day and firefighter dave not his real name comes home looking exhausted we could smell the smoke on him so we knew he had seen some action that day we asked him about it and he just got this really sad but humid look in his eye an instagram model has set her apartment building on fire by filling her room with candles for some photo shoot where she would pretend to be doing yoga in the middle of hundreds of candles but she saw a spider sitting on one of the lit candles so she sprayed some raid at it the room pretty much ignited extremely quickly and in her fear she threw the bottle of ray back the fire and then hid in her shower across the hall she was still in the apartment when dave kicked in the door and carried her out her apartment engulfed in flames she was close to passing out from smoke inhalation so dave had to cradle her in his arms as he carries her to the window to be lowered on a ladder she says wait dave stops thinking she is about to tell him about someone else that needs rescuing she meekly lifts her phone and snaps a selfie making the duck face and everything flames in the background apparently by the time he left the instagram model had posted the photo to her profile and it was already getting tons of likes from what i hear though she did kill the spider so technically she wasn't a total [ __ ] i mean we joke about burning the house down to kill a spider but this bee not me but my dad was a firefighter and he told me this story once he was serving on his volunteer fire department up in canada and they got a call about a burning car in a small neighborhood they rushed out to the location and there was a man drunk off his butt sitting in the driver's seat of a crashed pickup truck on the side of a small road while the truck's hood is on fire as they pulled the man out of the driver's side of the truck he kept yelling at them that his beer which was in the back seat was getting warm my dad says that this story makes him sad to think about but i still think it's at least somewhat funny i remember a story about this kid that decided it would be a fun game to go high before bedtime and lock himself in his parents bedroom after his parents noticed he wasn't brushing his teeth like he should be after putting on his pajamas they further noticed that their bedroom door was locked after some knocking and giggling they figured out what was going on all was okay fun and games was now over and it was time for bed it was then discovered by the kid when unlocking the door that by some terrible odds the key had jammed itself into the keyway and wouldn't turn to unlock after a few seconds of struggling panic set in and the waterworks came the parents also couldn't open the door despite their best efforts even going as far as disassembling the lock as much as possible from the hallway eventually after much frustration the father who was an off-duty firefighter had to drive all the way into the station on his day off to borrow the hand-pumped hydraulic door popper eventually he got back and managed to force the door open without too much damage to it or the frame he saved the day once again all on his day off the problem was eventually discovered to be that the kid used some random key he found that wasn't even meant for the type of lock on the door so how he managed to lock it with little to no effort is still a complete mystery to this very day my family often reminds me of the story sorry again dad once got called out to a fully involved two-story residential structure fire the fire had probably had time to consume the building for an hour or two before anyone noticed residents weren't home no nearby neighbors the place was so hot you could feel your skin starting to crisp up underneath your turnout gear 30 feet away obvious surround and drown operation no way were we saving any part of this building homeowner comes up to me screaming and crying while i'm on the nozzle that we have to go inside to save her for dogs i didn't know how to tell her that if i couldn't get close to the house in fireproof pants there was not a snowball's chance her dogs trapped inside was still alive all told it took about seven hours to put the fire out and another two to finish overhaul and packing up our gear the entire building was gone nothing but a few burnt out support beams left comes out later that she was illegally renting the place out like a tenement house to a bunch of day laborers and their families and had gotten someone to do unlicensed electrical work inside which started the fire it's a wonder no humans were hurt but i think about that fire and that woman's total disregard for safety or the well-being of her tenants a lot but spend a few bucks and hire a licensed union electrician people multiple families lost everything they owned that day because some cheap but landlord took shortcuts where she shouldn't have bonus story once rescued a fully grown woman who had somehow managed to wedge herself under a school bus seat and couldn't get out had to cut the whole seat off with a sawzall bus driver was none too pleased not really saving a person but like two weeks ago we got a call for a field fire with multiple structures in danger it was only six minutes from my house so i went pov personal vehicle got there and the 911 caller was pacing back and forth and the two fires were about three inches high and about two inches wide each really small fires structures supposedly in danger were down the road and you couldn't see them when the fire was actually spreading and this was before we got there it only burned about 10 feet long and four foot wide of dry grass we just stared at it until it went out which didn't take long then our truck finally arrived and the guys were really upset that we got called to something you could have looked at wrong and it would go out they soaked the ground that was burned and a little around it so whoever threw their sig in the grass doesn't set more grass on fire here are some in no particular order one had one lady try to drive through the middle of waffle house at lunch time we explained that it in fact wasn't a drive-through six months later we ran the same call on the same woman at the same waffle house 2 my buddy at the same department ran a house fire where a man with psychiatric problems set fire to himself and locked himself in the bedroom the firemen made a push into the house and found him sitting on his bed furiously masturbating the dragged him out still beating his meat and threw him in the ambulance dude was jacking off non-stop in the ambulance and at the hospital a few miles away i'm not sure what happened after he was dropped off but i'm assuming it was a race between him finishing himself off for the meds knocking him out not really sure which one i am hoping for more three had one lady drive her dirt bike off a 15-foot embankment when she was high as a kite she seemed okay for the most part but freaked out when i asked like a smartest is your arm normally like that and it was shaped like a lightning bolt four our station had to extricate a guy's scrotum out of a belt sander a few weeks ago he was apparently super polite given the circumstances not a firefighter but i am pretty sure a firefighter believed my call to be their stupidest i suffered a stroke at a relatively young age which caused partial paralysis and severe weakness in my left arm that i still struggle with four years later anyway around age 23 my face goes numb droops which makes my facial features symmetrical so it doesn't look off unless you know me i was struggling to walk properly and talk so i called an ambulance firefighter arrives and asks me what the problem is i am struggling to form proper sentences and think at all so i stutter mm my knee your knee what is wrong with your knee i was trying to explain what was going on but she cut me off every time but i insisted i still wanted to go to the hospital we get there and she really tells the staff that my knee hurts but when she leaves they let me stumble my words enough to explain my situation i just remembered i was able to tell her that i thought i was having a stroke but she just said young people don't have strokes volunteer firefighter this story isn't as stupid as most others i have seen but we got a call for search and rescue the call came out 30 minutes after dark we got a general direction of north of redacted address and that the callers were walking along a known trail and got lost the trail is about five miles long the day before we got heavy rain so it was all muddy and slippery the two girls of young age got old enough to hike on their own diverted a quarter of a mile off of the trail walked through a few inch deep stream and onto a small island we found the two they said they'd been out for about an hour and a half so 30 minutes before dark they started hiking and they had flip-flops on with no traction the part of the trail we went in we had people slipping with heavily tractioned boots because of how steep and non-maintained the trail is i'm still unsure how they made it that far in with all the mud and losing light tldr rescued two hikers that had very improper footwear for a muddy and steep trail and started the hike just before sundown and got lost if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video so do bye for now

Channel: Updoot Everything

Views: 31,387

Rating: 4.8866997 out of 5

Keywords: firefighter, firefighters in action, dumbest people, dumbest 911, dumbest 911 calls, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh

Id: zxRsVrsdhC0

Length: 23min 52sec (1432 seconds)

Published: Mon Aug 31 2020