Fast Food Tales | PKA

we're alive i had the opposite happen to me i went to chick-fil-a today right and there's this like really pretty 18 year old girl like at the window it's a drive farter let's say it again he's 18. i'm something like that and uh anyway she's like super nice to me like hey how you doing and i'm like uh like good and um she's like alright hey how's your day going i was like fine so far i guess you know that'll be 8 53 i'm like cool cool like do you want any condiments and i'm like no i'm just i'm fine it's just going on like guy are you sure there's nothing here that like you want like i could get you something and i'm like what the f like i'm 43 right one of my super powers is being invisible to 18 year old girls like that's that happens it'll happen to all of you and uh and she's being so sweet and and you know like later on like you know we get the money she gives me my car back are you sure no condiments nothing here i can do for you and i'm like like no no this is the drive i went into dirty old my manager's watching he thinks that i'm hoarding condiments no really honey mustard ketchup whatever you want just one she asked me at least three times to make sure my day was good at least twice on the condiments and a couple of random like how you doings and i'm like man this girl is really taking an interest in me but she was so sweet about it right she was so sweet about the whole thing it like it felt like she was hitting on me but i know that can't be the case because it's just filet people at chick-fil-a that work there it's almost unsettlingly nice how are they they how nice they are to you because i'm everywhere else you go you go to mcdonald's you get a bird there's a mcdonald's that i go to every so often and i swear to god i have to be like uh a carnival barker or like a bull auctioneer when they hand me my food where i'm like hey i like the ketchup like this they're just throwing it they bought you slam that door closed and i and i'm ketchupless because and like it's like they open it halfway out to like sneak my bag and if i tell them as they're putting the bag out like i'd also like some ketchup they look at me like i just told them i want you to run a half mile to the nearest ketchup fountain and get me a fresh glass of it it's because you're white yeah like well i mean it's white people that do that too mcdonald's you know we're really cutting back on ketchup stores and so try and get them out of there where they can remember i hear you but this isn't my first rodeo at chick-fil-a this girl was just unnaturally nice to me i i still don't have an answer for it she uh those big ketchups there you know the really big one that that's like you can either peel the whole pouch back and dip into it or you can just peel the front off and like squeeze it out capitalist innovation right there they got the catch ups they do have the best ketchups by far chick-fil-a apple fries chick-fil-a yeah they don't give you [ __ ] packets no taco little cups that you like squeeze the the ketchup into which are very frustrating my daughter taco bell tried to not give me any hot sauce the other night for my 26 dollars worth of taco bell that i had and i was just like it's done that's like six no no this is this is like this like a week ago i i'm still eating pretty fairly healthy healthily but but it's like 26 worth of taco bell it's two bags and one of the bags has a box inside of it okay like it's a lot of [ __ ] food and and she just hands it all to me and i had already said like she was like you want any sauce and i was like yeah a little of everything because i do i want like five or six of every kind of sauce they got there's no sauce in the bag there's no there's no spork for my cheesy fiesta potatoes there's no straws for my soda so i just sit there and like i'm just it's nighttime it's like 11 p.m and i'm just looking nobody has come back and maybe a solid 45 seconds has passed so i just go and just lay on the horn for like a solid 30 seconds you know let's make sure they hear and someone comes shuffling over the door like yeah what is it some hot sauce and some ketchup and some some some straws and some napkins they just looked at me like i was insane and i was just like yeah now like i was so angry i was so angry he liked that video i was crazy i was like yeah now like what the [ __ ] like i just bought 26 worth of like this [ __ ] food that you sell like come on i want my house to show some of money at a taco bell too like so that's no joke that's like you're keep reiterating it because it's so goddamn much you're an entire construction crew worth of food more more they've got a 10 for 10 deal for ten dollars you can get ten bean burritos i got twenty six dollars for them did you get ten bean burritos in your twenty six dollar order i don't do that i don't know that would have been disgusting i've done it before i've ordered ten i've ordered five i've like mixed it up because they will and i've gotten like five soft tacos three crunchy tacos and you know two bean burritos and then just eat it all myself that's man that's that's gross yeah yeah i love it i really love taco bell and normally the uh shirandra works up there and i'm not just saying that that's her name uh sharandra has been selling me taco bell for since i was 17 years old she's been working to taco and when she's there i recognize her voice i know on the on the on the speaker that i can talk quickly because she knows the menu but if it's anybody else i know it's a real crap shoot i'm not you asking for like is sharon were there this is a real ordeal it'd be quicker if you could grab her she doesn't make the food she's got those nails that are like crazy long and curved so she actually has a hard time even handing me the bag but she puts the stuff in there i think those nails help her like really capture a lot of extra sauce or something she's one of those crane machines that grabs like stuffed animals they're crazy long um but but yeah i i hate just fast food employees i know they're working for minimum wage and it's a shitty job but it is different when you go to chick-fil-a they're happy they're perky and they're good-looking they have some sort of interesting hiring practice there because like every time i go to chick-fil-a i see one chicken there that i'm saying i wish she was over here she'd get put my ketchup into my bag and that's not a clever euphemism either i just i just wanted to come over here you know there's always some good looking chicks at chick-fil-a yeah yeah chick-fil-a really changed the game they don't have that look to them like burger king and mcdonald's employees have like if you're a burger king like those people you can tell they know that that this is life is uh is on that downward curve they're like some of them walk around like they're the ghost of someone who was murdered at a burger king six years ago and just can't escape that's now their destiny just whoa it's sad in there and i feel for them um but but at chick-fil-a everybody's having a good old time they're they're like everybody's enjoying high-fiving everybody back there it's a bunch of like early 20s is the peak of that kind of behavior they sing they they sing often zippity do die as many times as you put change in or maybe they don't do that anymore they probably change the policy to where they don't they only have to sing like once every so often because they used to do it to where every time anybody at all they have to sing just put some quarters in and keep it going that's great i got micro aggressed at a mo's burritos uh uh the other day whatever they they rolled she rolled the burrito all right look first of all rolling that burrito up whether it's chipotle or moe's or willy's or whatever we're talking about the big burrito place where you look through the glass and tell them what you want on it they're all the same if you don't have a professional burrito roller there who's getting that steamy burrito rolled up in time then it's just [ __ ] and so this lady like sticks her thumbs in it like she's trying to like blind uh a a game of thrones character and just gout and i was just like and she's about to roll it up in the foil and i was like whoa whoa whoa whoa she's like what you know some salsa verde and i'm like no you know what well it looks like the burrito is torn i can see the beans coming out and she was like oh oh i didn't notice that i was like yeah yeah i'm gonna want a new one she's like okay okay so she goes and gets a new tortilla and flops it down and she takes my old burrito and just flips it upside down on top of the new tortilla and i was just like no that's not really a new one is it i was like see now all the ingredients are kind of homogenous and mixed together instead of creating that layer process that you're actually going for when you create the burrito i didn't say all this at length but i was basically like i want a whole new burrito i want you to start from scratch here and there was a little bit of a meltdown but finally they gave me my burrito was it one uh wait did they so they took the burrito and they like kind of just lifted it up like a tissue and like let the contents pour onto the new uh flopped it she took this she unrolled my burrito she unrolls my burrito and it's just like a homogeneous mixture of chicken black beans rice pico de gallo sour cream cheese and guacamole just like you mixed them together and and she just flops it upside down on top of a fresh burrito uh you know flour burrito tortilla and and then she that's supposed to be okay that wasn't okay yeah if that's if that's a microaggression i was microaggressed a couple of years ago at a qdoba when they did the same thing but they didn't even because i've had it done before it's happened to everyone at chipotle qdoba moe's whatever where they [ __ ] up your burrito and you're like oh can you just put it in a new fresh one and they do exactly what you said i've never minded it being a little bit mixed up i don't care about that as long as it's a fresh tortilla that's not perforated or punctured but what this person did this girl she must have been new because she punctured my burrito and she didn't have to be called on it she immediately like went over warmed up the next tortilla grabbed it brought it over but she just placed the old burrito in the new burrito and then wrapped it on top and it wasn't until i stopped her like wait wait that's that's two tortillas that's two tortillas wrapped in my burrito and she was like yeah i'm like i don't i only want one like no i could you please do it so that i only i'm very polite to people in food service so i would not be rude i was like if i remember correctly like please uh i'd like it with only one tortilla please otherwise there's just too much bread you know how it is and she acted like it was she she put on the smiley face but i could tell she was a little pissy about it but that was definitely a microaggression should have said i want a layer of melted cheese between the two tortillas then you're all good see that that's that's how i like to get mine usually anyway is i get the burrito wrapped in a quesadilla ah that's yeah it's a quesadilla tell them to kind of jerry rig it into your food of choice right there they do that that's the thing you ask if you're like hey make it a quesorito they're like oh good choice my friend they know they they just take another you know they take the tortilla out it's put the cheese on it and then they roll your burrito up in that so you've got what they're really doing is they're looking at the people behind you in line going another [ __ ] [ __ ] ordering them yeah oh is that what you want sir you're going to make you three entrees and just yeah all the same ingredients would you like me to do that okay sir everyone we're gonna wait we got someone here who wants three things in one i know sir you're probably ordering you have to get back to work that's fine this gentleman right here wants a case of freedom it's an eight dollar burrito they can take their time and roll that [ __ ] up and you know and of course i do the double meat trick where you don't tell them it's double meat until they've done the first scoop so now they've set a level of scoop size so right you don't want two halves when you order double no no they're skimpy with that chicken like it's on their dime right like like he paid for all that chicken another trick is if you're in that line if you're at a busy one sometimes they just have the same person going back and forth making burritos and whatever the whole time sometimes they have two that like switch yeah always go with the biggest person preferably male that you can find if you can let someone behind you go up front if there's a small woman making it then absolutely do that say i'm still thinking you go ahead and then she is going to make that guy or that girl the weak little burrito where she's like oh that looks like enough chicken for me that should be enough chicken for this adult man and they dump it in there no you want someone who has a little bit of empathy when they're making your burrito so they put that one scoop in and they go but i'd be happy with that i wouldn't be happy with that and this gentleman right here happy with that and we're going to keep this patron returning so it gives it a little extra a little third scoop it's only like six or seven cubes but it's enough yeah anyway and the difference is microaggressing me pretty hard right [Music] and

Channel: PKA Clips

Views: 15,878

Rating: 4.853147 out of 5

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Id: 8expKRPtVDA

Length: 12min 54sec (774 seconds)

Published: Tue Nov 10 2020