Everything Wrong With Squid Game - Season 1

in my town we had a game called the squid game roll commercial wait is this on netflix what the [ __ ] do we roll on netflix maybe roll credits that they'll never let you watch unless you take the time to find the resume credits section when the option should actually be skip credits and then if i want to watch the [ __ ] credits i can without being hassled by algorithms and netflix insane need to get views counted on people didn't want to watch but fell asleep or wandered out of the room so the thing started anyway and now ridiculous 6 has been viewed 300 million times because people can't just watch [ __ ] credits and make better choices with their follow-up selections also let's address the distractingly american-sounding squid-shaped elephant in the room that's our decision to send the english dubbed version of the show instead of leaving it in the much better original korean okay now that that's addressed on with the sitting it's your mom your mom if an attacker cuts through the waste of the squid past the defense then they are given the freedom to use both feet what in the name of all that is calamari are these rules this is a [ __ ] kid's game whatever happened to [ __ ] tag you're it [Music] man just really leaning into the ip or ripping off huh why not just give him the first name of battle and be done with it if someone on the defense manages to push you outside of the squid's boundaries you die that's right you die over exaggerating for dramatic effect right right vanity or bragging take your pick i sincerely apologize if i'm missing some well-known south korean subspecies of this marine animal but on what [ __ ] planet is this a squid the nose isn't nearly big enough remember guyong's birthday is today yeah of course i do the girl whose birthday it is is his [ __ ] daughter just thought that was worth mentioning in case his reaction to this news understandably how'd you thinking this person was his ex-wife or satan please select the amount you would like inspector royale did i use it right damn it ah the old woman cares about her granddaughter more than her own son and this is surprising to him in the space of three minutes he's guilted her into giving him more of her own money so he can buy a present for his daughter harassed her for daring to have a job and stolen her [ __ ] credit card i mean what's not to love choosing to show gambling addiction with people shouting while watching a horse race only to be disappointed their sure bet didn't come through cliche hey kid you okay finding a hole in his jacket doesn't immediately mean it was stolen by this person why couldn't have just fallen out while he was running i'm being foreshadowed at aren't i also there's so little contact here i can't see how she could have possibly slightly handed her way into cutting open his jacket pocket and grabbing that envelope also also gee whiz she must be the luckiest pickpocket in south korea she's just managed to accidentally herself into a huge amount of cash by simply being in the way there's no chance she could have known that he was going to run through here or bump into her or which pocket to pick once he did poor thing excuse me sir you need to stop and pick the prize you want first this kid in the web of lies he weaves these claw machines were crafted as a result of a singular never to be repeated alliance between lady luck and satan himself their goal was to create the most efficient way to suck the soul from a person's body via their wallet while their disappointed offspring watch on wishing they had better parents it's only redeeming quality is that the second you give up the next worker that uses it is immediately rewarded just in case you thought you'd be able to move on and live a normal life stop and pick the prize you want first indeed [Music] this [ __ ] picked a mystery black box when stitch is right [ __ ] there aggressively hugging a child you do not know without explicit consent what's up huge mosquito bite pencil i had no idea that mosquitoes even had fists let alone use them for biting i know siang isn't going to win any father of the year awards but why would he not check what this present is before handing it over even if it hadn't been a gun the odds of it being something that his daughter wouldn't care for are pretty [ __ ] high it again raises the question why did he even pick the mystery box in the first place when stitch was right there holy sh did she just pull the trigger not knowing it was a lighter i'll give all the sins back if we eventually find out gaeung is the head of the squid games hello sir can i talk to you rumor has it it's taken this man many many years to recruit seong into the squid games as a result of choosing this [ __ ] approach every day he's had to wait in this train station for hours at a time just hoping xiang will finally miss a train you've got to feel sorry for him it's time after time xiang would make his scheduled departure this poor chap would be left to sadly walk home shamefully hanging his head thinking no next time that'll be the time that i get him just you wait and see i don't believe in jesus hey you i demand that you clap your hands right this instant wait was that for saving jesus or fairies would you like to play a game with me agreeing to play a game with anyone at a subway station at night this doc she's on for all the some time [Music] inspector royal that's still not right damn it 160 million won owed just to loan sharks and you owe 250 more to the bank exchange rates and inflation are wild man i've spent every other minute googling juan to dollars trying to work out just how screwed saeng is the answer is very to the tune of about 350 000 now i have to sing the show for making me do math in my leisure time to that in the remainder of the sins in this video will be converted to sin won with the current exchange rate that'll be 1187 sinwon to each usn i rounded down because the show is pretty great you're welcome look what i got [Laughter] kion what'd you do now you gamble again don't you look at me like that didn't compulsive liars he got into seoul national university thanks to me i used to take him to school when we were there's always that one [ __ ] that manages to ride on the coattails of the successful and claim that their tiny contribution was integral to said success i mean it's not like he created a youtube channel dedicated to pointing out the overused cliches and errors in popular media now that would be a contribution we're celebrating i got that with money i made getting slept so enjoy it thing i said to my parents after giving them their christmas presents i bought with the money i made for my first sex tape somehow makes its way into the episode who you are gambling again of course not it's still too early to tell if sayong is an [ __ ] or not so the director told him to shove as much rice into his mouth as possible just before he starts talking while the audience makes up their mind i talked to that young man upstairs who knows the law and he said that the father has to show the child will have financial support and when you can prove that then you can take custody but if the divorce is final and the custody has already been decreed it'll take a lot more than extra money to get the custody overturned did he also suggest planning heroin on the mother's person because that would have a better chance of working or so i've heard i can see why wanting to keep his daughter would motivate xiang to try to win this money but a one-off cash payment isn't going to convince the courts to give him custody if anything it's going to look even more suspicious that this unemployed man who struggles to keep a job down suddenly has a bajillion trillion wand to his name if they're running this gas every time a new person gets in the van then the other people are just getting re-gassed how do they ensure they aren't bringing any dead contestants to the game i'd be questioning the efficiency of this company immediately after waking up in this room look at all this unused space amateurs this entire operation looks like it's been kitted out with a bunch of repurposed pac-man and galaga arcade machines that scar on your neck you're the damn pickpocket at this point seong should be well aware that he has had his clothing and personal belongings taken and that everyone else seems to be in a similar position so why does he expect this woman to still have his money who the hell who are you trying to have a tough guy scene when everyone is wearing tracksuits you took all our stuff and put us to sleep coming here and then you brought us to this strange warehouse now you're saying you'll pay us if we go and play a few games you really expect us to buy that did this guy not get the same pitch that cyan got okay the loss of consciousness and sudden change of clothing might have been a surprise but what did you think you were signing up for if it wasn't this night school we do not disclose the faces and personal information of our staff to any of the participants except for this guy in charge of recruitment who has the most public facing of jobs because that guy also if anonymity is so important why go through the risk and effort of using this recruitment method at all judging by this crowd there doesn't seem to be a shortage of desperate people with debts they can't afford to pay off doesn't look like there was any need for this hard sell at all i think most of these people would have responded to the business card if it was just posted through their door with a note attached saying ring this number for cash this is now the second occasion of seong signing a contract with a shady criminal or criminals makes me wonder why said criminals are even bothering with said contracts with contractual consequences that vary from light maiming to death surely they can't be legally binding who'd have loved to be in this designer meeting what do you think of her styles and colors well have you ever thought what m.c escher mixed with duplo blocks in a little rainbow bright color aesthetic mixed in would look like identity verified i actually really like this show but this sure looks like they're using facial recognition on a [ __ ] mask that could be worn by anybody this could be the dumbest [ __ ] security measure i've ever seen and i just rewatched home alone damn that thing has a freaking huge head of course it does it's like 20 feet tall it has a huge everything well then then on the first one there talking while instructions are being given i'm just saying when your brain sprays out onto the ground slim shady i'll be sure to pour 40 ounces if i told you so in your honor player 324 eliminated why did [ __ ] 324 get the special treatment of having their elimination announced when everyone else in the scene just got mowed down like so many cannon fodder chatari seriously how is no one getting caught in friendly fire here i know most of these people are down on their luck and probably don't have anyone in their lives that would notice their disappearance but out of the couple hundred dead bodies here at least some of them have a family member or friend who would care enough to call the police in fact the only two people we know so far definitely have people who would give a [ __ ] if they didn't come home and all of them will have disappeared shortly after having a strange meeting involving a game with a person who isn't wearing a [ __ ] mask i'm just saying how do you cover up this many people disappearing over a short space of time all under similar circumstances without eventually being found out don't look back just listen but he literally just moved his head so how is seong not dead now do the shooters know he's a main character we've gone through several rounds of this game now and i'm [ __ ] staggered at the dumbasses that are still failing to follow this very simple red light rule as if their lives didn't [ __ ] depend on it show has time for this automated musical interlude next time on lost starting your episode with a visual role commercials metaphor in your episode title cliche also that's right we'll continue totaling up the sins as sin juan because there's no better way to prove math sucks than by doing lots of math plus the current conversion rate is 1166.6 the episode title is hell so it's clear we're all doing the devil's work today i don't know if it's their garish color scheme the whimsical music that accompanies them or their generally nonchalant attitude towards death but these guys always remind me of willy wonka's oompa-loompas and suddenly this whole operation makes a lot more sense to me this is a moody shot and all but you're telling me that not one of these remaining participants would still be screaming or crying or pacing around searching for an escape even if they were in shock wouldn't it be more comfortable to be in shock in your bunk but no someone was like hey we've got all these beds and this is a giant room but let's all huddle silently sitting on the floor together for maximum downer vibes cool summer you helped me thank you no he did not what he did was call your name which made you turn your head which should have resulted in your death although with this show i wouldn't be surprised if that was the idea all along we covered this last time but it bears mentioning again this english dub is terrible then it doesn't even need to be there's a huge community of fantastic voice artists out there you think long and hard about that while we convert your 20 tv sins into sin juan i still need to name my child sir procrastination also does it make anyone else uncomfortable that out of the group of 200 or so people most of which appear to be men that the first three to beg for their life are all women i'm just saying i have demolished everyone in that room if a grovel contest was the game reinforced gender stereotypes be damned there seems to be a misunderstanding a misunderstanding of the situation would have required the participants to have had said situation fully explained to them in the first place yes the rules of the game and the cash prize at the end of it were all explained but there was also the very salient omission of being [ __ ] murdered if you fail why isn't that in the contract if you just follow the rules you can leave this place safely with the prize money we promised well that's a lie in future games you also have to win you could absolutely follow the rules and still be killed and sure lying to them might make sense but in a show that seems to be saying the goal is about order and rules and legitimate contracts these kinds of blatant falsifications stand out consent form clause 3 if all the players agree to stop playing the games are allowed to end or am i wrong the contract we saw in episode one consisted of three very basic clauses and yet saying woo is presenting this clause through revelation as if he's discovered some fundamental loophole in the magnifying garda also this piggy bank's on for 35 seconds damn could they not have used larger denominations also also the piggy bank makes for a nice motivational visual but unless they actually intend on sending the winner out with 45.6 billion won and a few dozen briefcases what's the point having the cash physically there is a huge security risk be they on a deserted island or not and it appears the pig nostrils are open you never leave the pig nostrils open amateurs if you wish to continue playing press the green button with an o if you wish to stop playing then please press the red button with the x instead hold menus if we stop right now that only helps the ones who are dead they get 100 million one and not us arguments that you think sound really convincing but simply expose you as the insensitive and immoral squid that you really are we will not condone any kind of act that impedes this democratic process therefore any acts we do condone are by default promoting the democratic process oink it seems we're down to the last vote because of course it came down to the last [ __ ] vote which means that they were either all deliberately keeping it 50 50 because none of them wanted to fully commit to either option or it's down to dumb luck that they just happened to be split right down the middle what would have happened if there were an even number of players left also why wasn't this voting in the accompanying vote counter anonymous surely being able to see the result in real time has the potential to skew the final result come on guys it can't be that hard to implement a fair voting system that everyone agrees with oh oh look there's the form of a stick figure playing what appears to be tug of war i'm sure that must mean something and in a group this size someone will explore the room enough to find it and it will result in all sorts of discoveries can't wait for that to happen the doctor said there's a lump inside over here growing every day brain tumor unnecessary flashback expositional reminders if the majority of you wish to participate again then we will resume the game but how exactly you send 201 people back out into the world and then you just wait for 101 of them to give you a call from the card do you assume those that voted to stay will always want to come back so you just need one person to call what if a stay vote finds love and stability outside the game can they change their vote in the same way someone who wanted to leave can what if they lose the card change their phone number how do they track them this is a fun little twist but the details on how when and why you would get all these people back are vague at best and impossible at worst but also the choice to put the games on pause and send them back to their lives may be the most brilliant part of this entire show's structure it allows us to see the driving concept of the games and then releases us to not only feel more of the backstories but truly understand the similarity of their real-life existence to the game itself it solidifies the metaphor in such a real way that i can't help but take off a couple sin juan for the choice hurry up now oh that hurts hey hey stop come on it's my turn now dialogue of my sex tape i swear i'll forget the whole thing how can i trust you i swear on my on my own mother okay this works and yes we mean it both ways gihon's money boner is apparently so strong it wouldn't even wait to allow him to untie his feet so he wouldn't have to haplessly and hopelessly hop at the pickpocket mondays you've got to realize what a massive deal all this was i know it sounds crazy it seems like the show wants us to believe the police never get involved because of how ridiculous the whole story sounds but there are 201 people who just left this game at least a hundred of which were itching to get out of there they all have cards they all have eyewitness accounts they might even be able to describe some of those who were killed i'm just saying hiding this game is probably a bit more complex than no one will believe you so you're saying that your kidnappers rounded up hundreds of people and had them play a game then went out there and shot the ones who lost previously on squid game then give us the killer's description they all had these masks on the whole time we were there or you could just describe the guy at the subway station who definitely wasn't wearing a mask and is probably still out there recruiting people but no apparently the show thinks it's more entertaining for the police to believe gihan is an idiot so play the part of the idiot he shall here's the number it's on a business card call it and see what they say the one piece of physical evidence that gihan has and he's waited until after he's explained everything in the vaguest way possible and all the cops think he's actually insane before he decides to share it this lidless container and its potential keyboard ruining contents it is by no means impossible but it sure as lucky gihon swings by here right as sengwu is spying on his mother dumb luck when you can't be bothered to write something convincing you haven't been home in days now out doing whatever it is you're doing lately but now you're a good son huh gihon's mom would be inspector royale at tv sins remember you ended it and used up all the cash we had exposition induced amnesia is just the worse for everyone a police officer have you forgotten that is he asking his mom or us sorry sometimes i can't tell with how often the show feels the need to remind us of obvious things we already know well isn't this the most convenient episode of conveniences or what chinho just happens to be at the front desk of the police station at the perfect time to notice the squid game business card being on show so that he'd have a lead later on when he finds the same business card in his brother's apartment you just couldn't write this stuff was he drunk some crazy hobo guy everything's crazy around here today unnecessary repeat sins about unnecessary flashback expositional reminders abandoning an occupied stroller someone call teddy bear protective services let me think about it something like sang or song or something uh and how about getting me his address too kihun's name is causing all sorts of issues but his address no [ __ ] problem let me just pull it up on my database i think i have it filed under moving the plot along it would be amazing if these episode two moments for the characters foreshadowed something for them later in the show i'd take a cinwon off for that for sure oh well probably not i imagine getting that to work would be too much of a pain in the neck you pull anything on me i'll rip your [ __ ] throat wide open and that's that i'm not sure how effective a throat ripping will be on a man who can clearly take third degree burns to 100 of his face as if it were nothing more than a caffeine-enriched facial pack does she keep doing that in this shot the pocket is completely intact and the camera doesn't move from her the entire time she has him in knife point yet now the pocket has been sliced open and the contents presumably lifted is she hiding six extra arms is she this game's actual squid [Music] squid mame i'm afraid that mr chosun wu has a warrant out for his arrest these [ __ ] police officers burst into sangwoo's mother's business while she's in mid-transaction to accuse her son of embezzlement and fraud i'm sure they're desperate to find him but could they not have just waited 60 seconds for her to finish up instead of embarrassing her in front of this customer misunderstanding the term bathing suit [Applause] [Music] who is it why did the person at the door ring the doorbell for all this time if they're just going to slip the note under the door anyway why not just ring the bell a few times slip the card under it and leave so that i didn't have to be triggered by the feeling of walking around soaking wet while fully clothed wait so everyone's just getting one of these new cards and they all just show back up not a single one of these calamari competitors found something better in life than going back to the place that might brutally murder them sure i send it already once but if the show's gonna keep complicating this catch and release and then catch again program i'm gonna keep on sitting it i'll continue my chauffeuring and come help around here this line doesn't lead to a parasite squid game connected universe connected universes are the only true entertainment damn it coming out to someone's nice pub and smoking outside's route citation needed what are the odds you're here at the same time as me what are the odds right this is like the fifth time these two have exclaimed how crazy it is that they're meeting like this so i put the odds that show uses the only random meeting that is intentional to pound home the convenience because it makes them look better later to one something about friday nights always brings out the weirdos that's friday nightist parking in a driving lane on a bridge hey look here you jerk oh yeah well a jerk is a tug and a tug is a boat and a boat floats on water and water is nature and nature is beautiful so thank you what i just figured if the show is going with grade school insults i should go with grade school come back since and now you're gonna die your [ __ ] [ __ ] in the future sir may i recommend exiting the vehicle of the former gang boss who you've just admitted to betraying before prematurely celebrating harder than a 10 year old who doesn't realize that the t-rex shaped present under the tree is actually a giraffe they're not the same mom okay it would be amazing if these episode 2 moments for the characters foreshadowed something for them later in the show i take a sinhoan off for that for sure oh well i imagine the show will cross that bridge when it comes to it you know i watched that guy die with my own eyes but no hospital though he couldn't go honey we're home judging by this entry the stepdad and kids somehow apparently didn't hear any of this borderline skipworthy ruckus golf wait it seems that gehan's ex-wife not only managed to explain the situation with his mother but also managed to convince the stepdad to pull out the equivalent of two thousand dollars put it in an envelope while still leaving enough time to catch up to gihon before he'd barely made it 20 steps out of the building that's some unbelievable efficiency i mean it it's literally unbelievable do you think money sells everything dad why you know it's not helped by the already mentioned terrible dub but even without it this show really does teeter into melodrama at times maybe they should have named the show battle royale with cheese instead of slipping it under the door like they did at sengwu's place the squid game [ __ ] decide to leave gihan's invite sticking out of the door where it can easily get lost to ruined by the weather quality my ass cool we now know why these six all decided to willingly re-enter the gee hunger games only 95 more backstories to go for it all to make sense zyboc doesn't understand how knockout gas works and yet this [ __ ] works probably the most unbelievable part of this episode is that june hoe follows the van this closely on deserted roads and isn't considered suspicious by the van driver and that's all i can really say about that because my phone has auto don't ruin the plot correct character checks to see if their gun accidentally unloaded itself not because they really need to but because the audience needs to know they have a gun cliche sure because sliding beneath a van and dragging yourself along the road is super easy to do [Music] hey did you hear that yeah that's the sins bam squid game uses red text and includes the same bam we use in our intros and now i can only assume that the show is taunting us as a way to make sure we send them so just remember that anything you don't like about this video is really the creator's fault we're just doing their bidding at this point there are literally drivers in every vehicle and guards posted for this very reason and no one sees this so red suit guy scans the passengers in the van that he has been driving without giving a second thought to the reality of having an additional person in the back we're not even five minutes in and we're already dealing with the golden corral of convenient obliviousness buffets none of the highly trained individuals on this ship notice one van violently shaking back and forth i should probably just stop mentioning all the ways people in the show seem to miss the obvious here's five thousand sin won for any more instances jung ho change this guy's clothes then goes the extra mile to tuck his shirt into his pants and buckle his belt before chucking him off the boat just check him off the boat and stop wasting time murder and yes i know there's a lot of that on this show but i think he's supposed to be one of the good guys for a well-funded well-guarded death festival this place sure does have lack security you know these people are coming back and you can't invest in a few metal detectors this very obvious heartbeat in the neck a lot of people decided to come back so there you go 187 of the 201 people decided to come back to murder game central because when a large group of people see 56 of their companions get executed right in front of their eyes 93 of them are like yeah let's go back to that place think she named a kid yet why would anyone name their kid yet you're right who knows what game they'll have us play next yeah it's not like they're gonna paint it on the walls for you come on let me join you guys geez we're spending the first 15 minutes of this episode on what teammate selection just get to the squid gaming already and satiate our desire for violence and hypocritical need to send you for it how about it plenty of empty bits emptying stubborn ketchup bottles on empty beds keep an eye on the ones who didn't return to play and keep me posted me too can i be kept posted too that sounds like a really interesting idea and now that you've drawn attention to it i'm sure the show will explore it more this season this may look efficient to you but after 409 gets his foodie crosses in front of 417 which stops the flow of traffic this is not the vision i wish the rice was piping hot that's racist and for girls there's congee elastics cat's cradle whoa oh there buddy how dare you gender cat's cradle how pinkie pull your tractor face so fast you can't even handle my string theory son this flapping gum noodle you may be wondering how anyone would be suspicious of june hoe in his mask costume but some people are observant enough to notice that their neighbor is shorter fatter or using a different dominant hand all things that could really blow juno's cover you know aside from having no clue about the pink suits patterns of walking and movement hey hey open the door you jerks i have to pee really bad right now this sentence for having to watch player 212 scratch the door like a cat in heat for 60 seconds so she can have a [ __ ] potty break also how do they not have a bathroom open at night in the common area for the love of prostates are none of the players over 40. i think i'll go pee right here and now here i go you all ready to hear some rain your intimidation tactics of all the contraband to slip into the game this is what you choose to stuff in a container and pop into your crotch pocket why not a taser or a knife or don't go back and smoke whenever you want are you going to go in there i want to see what's up there how are these two not being supervised setting aside that the powers of the b could certainly find a female guard it's not exactly like this place is heavy on the privacy protocol hey guys make sure you clear the slaughtered bodies from the floor and incinerate them oh and strip change all the players while they're unconscious but don't you dare be in the same room as a woman while she pees we might get sued perpetuating the lie that an air duct will support a human's body weight this hurts a lot it's like trying to push out a kid ah i'm dying honest question is she trying to keep the guard out or get them in here to check on her because going this far over the top seems like the latter is the more likely option [Music] i mean this in the nicest way possible but if 212 doesn't die in this episode i can't keep watching i just can't the island abductions surveillance and the masks oh oh things also included in the show lost please wake up and prepare for your duties kind wake up notifications if you want me out of my warmth cocoon you're gonna have to treat me like the lazy no good nick i truly am say something like either get up or i'll strip your blanket off and squirt you with this water gun while farting in your face you know like a good mom would are you saying they were melting sugar in there i think they were i know this clue obviously leads someone to figure out the next game but why would you think this was anything more than some sort of jello or something they were making for the next meal why is everyone so sure this is a game clue when if i'd spotted it i've been like damn it i found the kitchen but where's the game closet any chocolate milk i can't drink the normal kind asking your death camp counselor for special treatment i'm also explaining your digestive history to a stranger as a kid i'm willing to bet you got spanked a lot how did you know spanking your children for being lactose intolerant in other words parents all the games they've made us play in here are games that i've known since i was a young boy and by all the games do you mean the single game you've played your theory is fine but why would you say it this way unless it's a mistranslation of the dub in which case i'm more than happy to assign this end to that nonsense instead you know as a dub step of precaution where the hell is this playground so huge i think it's meant to be a clever way to make you feel like a kid again but i'm pretty sure they overshot it by about 15 cause honestly you'd have to be an infant to be that much smaller than the slide we can all agree on that right no fine i'll do the math that slide appears to be a little over three times as tall as these guys the average male height is about five nine so that slide would be right around 17 feet three inches tall the average seven year old height is around four feet and the tallest playground slides are about 10 feet or about 2.5 the size of the average 7 year old which means this slide should be 2.5 times higher than the average five nine guy or around fourteen four which is about 35 inches shorter than this slide and 35 inches over 17 3 which is 207 inches means that this slide should be 16.9 shorter than it currently is boom math so here's a sin one for the playground equipment being too large a sin won for math in general a sin won for not believing me and a sin one for all the time you wasted making me do this once you've chosen your shape please stand in front of it the shapes yes yes that is what she meant should we play this together that could be dangerous i know we're setting up songwood to be a selfish [ __ ] in this thing but what advantage does he get by sending his friends and teammates to more difficult shapes on pure self-interest alone doesn't it make the most sense for him to keep them around at this point he doesn't even have to let them know he knows what the game is he can simply answer this question with a sure let's all be on the same team and then lead them to the triangle or circle for some made-up reason maybe like he's a fan of the netflix reality show the circle or something synergy songwoo it's called synergy [Music] sugar honeycombs is not a game sugar honeycombs is a breakfast cereal america where did all these extra crumbles come from one much how nice that the first player who breaks their honeycomb shape just happens to be on the slide and in perfect position to take a dramatic tumble down it what a cinematic stroke of good fortune also we've now entered the multiple point-blank gun murder portion of the episode look i like this show but sometimes i don't like that i like this show i suppose cheating by using your vagina lighter as its own sin but the bigger sin is how do people keep getting away with this stuff when there are guards everywhere number 29. wait is he scamming the suit we know junhoe hasn't had a chip installed so are the chips in the suit that's a terrible idea you know some of these discount minions are getting freaky at night and accidentally swapping suits i hear those triangle faces are into all sorts of nasty shenanigans right i can melt it from the back the outline is thinner so it'll melt first yes i know you literally just showed us that through the actions of the character you know like you were supposed to and then you ruined it by not trusting your audience enough and over expositioning us we're dumb just not quite that dumb taking this long to discover the joys of cookie lingus well i wanted to send all this close-up licking so i wondered if there was a word that better described close-up of licking so i [ __ ] googled close-up of licking damn it [Laughter] is this show seriously saying that this tiny needle somehow penetrated that mask and with enough pinpoint accurate placement that it's actually in the guard's eye this needle is barely even in the mask and that mask is an inch away from his eyes at least this needle is an inch away from barely scratching this guard's cheek at best and i can't believe the show went with needle attack for the guard takedown over just tackling him and grabbing the gun what kind of sick game was that what sort of question is this you're literally playing a game designed to kill people once again even though i said i'd stop bringing it up i can't help but say no one sees this running on the stairs if these people aren't careful someone's gonna get hurt good thing this machine came with the push the button twice and it will delete exactly the selection you were thinking software installed very convenient thank you thank you for what how am i supposed to know anything about what's going on without a previously on segment you saved me thank you number one for this graphic reminder of the events of the last episode just as my eyeballs had finally healed from all the acid i had to pour on them after watching it for myself thanks a bunch i'm sorry i was wrong to suggest separating i don't say that how could you know what it was one of the reasons this show grinds my gears is that i honestly have no idea whether gihan knows exactly what's going on or is completely freaking oblivious or is just outright dumb i really want to root for the guy i really do i just wish he wasn't so pathetic once again this episode persists in piggy banking on for all of the money grabbing some time the total prize money accumulated so far is now 34.8 billion won joe manages to predict the total number of sin juan it will get by the end of the season wait do they not get socks this just seems like a recipe for foot fungus and all sorts of unpleasant odors come to think of it the show doesn't really indicate if the players have multiple outfits or if there's a wash day and honestly what are we even watching for if we aren't going to explore laundry protocol hard-boiled eggs would not be my first choice as a prison manager largely due to the huge cleanup job that would be required now since the rest of the episode isn't punctuated by the crunching of 200 discarded eggshells underfoot i'm assuming that somebody eventually cleaned them all up which is a huge waste of that somebody's time if you're committed to eggs then just de-shell them in the kitchen when will a tv show do breakfast right when you're branding their bottles with the shapes logo what's the point of that did you have them made up at your local place or hit up discountdeathmugs.com i mean if you're looking for marketing opportunities maybe start with the jumpsuits and the director said well they're all out apples so let's have the character break an egg on his forehead after assuming it's hard-boiled so the audience truly knows he's making an [ __ ] out of you and um ming why is 212 covering this side of her mouth from being seen when as far as we can see the only people who might see her behind her shut your mouth and grab an egg title of my sex tape this feels like an extreme overreaction i mean doc sue is shelling out a real beating here and if he's not careful he'll crack a rib and scramble this guy's poor organs he really should stop before the yolk goes too far unlike me the fuchsia suits just let this beating lead to murder y again up until now they've been very clear about the integrity of the games and yes they'll say they all planned it later but we'll cross that glass bridge when we come to it my point is if i was one of the american vips and i lost a bet on this kind of off the book i would be furious i said if you just died can't you hear me huh help us now kihan is for some reason still surprised by the baroness of the field that should contain the fox given by the people who run this place this room apparently has cremation ovens lined up on both sides it must be hot as hell in that room those ovens operated 1800 degrees each so at the very least these guards should be sweating through their fully enclosed rouge bodysuits hurry it'll be bedtime too being a dick about your undercover organ harvester's bedtime we gotta keep an eye out it'll be dangerous and we'll come here if anything goes down if they're that paranoid then why are they even splitting up stay together take a watch each at least then you'll see the murder coming and have a chance to make peace with your deity of choice tonight if anything happens we'll all meet in my bed right there are you in lame orgy pickup lines listen you don't trust people here because you can you do it because you don't have anybody else this could be the worst damn advice ever given in the history of television an absence of options does not mean you default to trusting whoever happens to be in the room that is not how trust works people by that logic they should just go ahead and trust snakes on a pain in the ass over here and sleep soundly we gave you less food on purpose to make you all fight each other first bullsh there was less food because five people took seconds sure the portions were small but if no one cuts in line and no one gets angry and no one happens to beat someone to death and none of this works out to your plan also even if this is the case which i repeat it is not why would all the workers know this this is a triangle face i mean a square face maybe but a freaking triangle face give me a break okay last episode they hid the note in the food because he was in the middle of all the other players which makes sense but why bother this time around they have him performing organ removals on a corpse in a secret room and they're worried about passing a note i'm a doctor out there you might need me so you gonna come give me a shot if i get sick this show may well be doubling down on making 212 as annoying as humanly possible does she need to be this stupid of course a doctor would be a helpful addition to the team even if this next challenge is a zero-sum game of live or die she knows that they're going to be starting a fight tonight so what's the harm in keeping the doctor until then are you getting any better offers go sit somewhere in a corner come lights out don't breathe or make a noise if i hear you breathe then i'll come for you turkey basters [Music] did that really require a [ __ ] jog [Music] this player must have known that she's in very real danger after pointing the finger at these guys earlier and yet she just lays in her bed hoping it will all blow over you know what they say denial's not just a character on frasier also i know i've mentioned it before but this whole night of murder mini-game makes zero of the sense as part of the squid game it depends on random events and is chaos in an otherwise ordered environment someone got their purger butter in my choco squid and i am not having it also this darks on for all the some time and then strobes on for all of the even more amounts of all of the some time wow it was almost like they were taking orders from the random old guy can you imagine if that was the case of course there's no way a show about violent death games would be that nuanced with its foreshadowing huh shooting into the air is soon enough when you're outside let alone inside where did those bullets hit did they not ricochet what if you hit the pig won't anyone think of the pig when and why did he install interior mask lighting hey big guy is that a knife in your pocket or are you just oh never mind player 277 eliminated player 74 eliminated player 198 eliminated i love how after drag out melee involving one knife a broken bottle and a lot of fists and bunk beds everyone is either completely fine or completely dead there should be people with broken limbs collapsed lungs concussions and all sorts of various injuries look at this wide shot i see at least 13 corpses here many of which appear to have died instantly from stab wounds and later they confirmed 27 kills there was one knife and one broken bottle here in like five minutes unless john wick snuck into the room this is an impossible amount of fatalities show has time to once again show us how the geometry guards deal with dead bodies this is the one part of this that actually already made sense so move it along people appreciate this wide shot so i can compare a few numbers here earlier you said there were 107 people left but there are at least 121 people still lit up on the board here later you'll confirm the new postmaster total is but once these lights go out you're only down to 95. so either you've screwed up or you've got about 15 nameplates with lights stuck on that you might want to get checked out got any electricians in your shapely crew also why are these numbers all out of order murder all the people you want but i will not stand for shoddy visual organizational practices nobody here got hurt so that's good disregarding emotional trauma that's pretty name i'm not sure how well it fits wow the rare patronize a woman by calling her name pretty and insult a woman's appearance line drive double down the left field line that's gonna notch two more sbis and it's only the top of the fourth sitting but what's my reward for guessing i'll go think about it in the restroom okay well that's escalated quickly previously 212 had to beg to go to the bathroom and now they're both being allowed out for a quick hide the squid game of their own why is this even being allowed storing your penis and your cigarettes in the same location who exactly are these one-word notes supposed to be helping this seems like june hoe could have easily remembered so why not add some more details and if instead their men is a here's what i learned in case i've been prematurely cremated message to his superiors then it's even more useless this could just as easily be the notes to junho's debut novel in progress the story of a triangle mass gang leader that gets caught up in a riot resulting in the accidental murder of his own brother wait someone get netflix on the line i've got a movie morse code i'm not sure which to send more that his brain turned random coughing into morse code and roughly zero point get the [ __ ] out of here seconds or that he happened to know morse code enough to translate it this quickly so i'll just send that this phone still has 39 battery left somehow instead what's the point of this design where you have to randomly walk upstairs just to walk back down them and why are there no guardrails i'm seriously starting to think they don't care about these people's safety we have a team well the thing is though so i can't join unless she does too so player 69 can't do anything without his partner being involved nice i'm good at everything you know that's true how could he possibly know what she's saying is true is this a sexual reference because i doubt that you setting an intercourse record or being a fellatio overachiever is going to come into play in the next game one two three four five counting this slow because you're waiting for the camera to catch up i would now like to welcome you all to the third game today's game is tug of war episode takes 40 minutes to start squid gaming this image is stunning when it comes to cool visuals squid game truly killer damn it the us presidency this bloody crucifix is a bloody lie unless one of the guards decided to go over it again with a much thicker application of people inc okay when i was young we always like talk war it's a game i know well and back then i would always win get to the strategy already number one your elevator ride to the death platform is already over and you're still here giving your bona fides the show will now slow down their walk to the rope as if he could give all these instructions on the way there but by the time he's talking about having a good person in the front they're already being handcuffed in seriously when is the speech even happening death isn't the only thing they cheat in this game they cheat the timing too i'll count to three one two three is it just me or do these cliffhangers ring hollow when netflix has already skip credited me to the next episode before i've even had a chance to get up and grab a cup of earl grey also squid game is bold but it doesn't kill off 90 of the main cast in one tug bolt so it's hard to believe there's more than one possible outcome to this cliffhanger or is there stay tuned to the next thrilling installment of tv sims to find out previously on oh that's right this is just the exact same scene from last episode that was cut off right before i finished i mean it finished so technically i've already given this multiple sins but new day new sins also immediately starting the show with moaning and screaming so when myself and everyone sitting around me at starbucks find out my headphones didn't engage because the jack is too full of pocket lint my status is an upstanding member of society is immediately called into question and to those of you out there sneering at the screen and calling me a luddite for not having bluetooth headphones the battery and those died so i was using the backup set of wired headphones with the accompanying dongle it was the dongle damn it the dongle failed me i'm a good person take three steps when i signal no one on the other team hears them yelling this plan out loud slip-on shoes seem like a great idea until you find yourself in a life or death game of tug-of-war on a five-story high platform breathing breathing breathing excitement the commitment to these three shapes has made it all the way to the controls on these monitors but why i get the commitment to the whole theatricality of the game with regard to the contestants but how does this help anyone behind the scenes what's your name huh what do you care about that so i can use your name dog number 240 would be the squid game champion at tv sins even after the dorm when all no holds barred in the last episode establishing a severe lack of rules not a single person takes the opportunity to push a few of their fellow competitors off the side of this osha violation masquerading as a walkway did you see that guy with his pants like a little baby making fun of the people you just murdered what exactly is the point of the bows on the coffins i mean i get it stack of the gift box they each receive but there's no one to appreciate that decorative decision this just seems like wasted overhead the success of this body harvesting scheme is somehow less believable than the death game going on upstairs never mind the absurd and ever expanding number of people that have to be involved in this plot and all the infrastructure this process seems to require the simple fact is it all hinges on this masked individual recognizing when this masked individual is looking at the camera and knowing for sure that they are the masked individual who is in on the plan just think of the pileup that would occur at the bottom of this incinerator if another unwitting masked individual just happened to be staring in the general direction of the camera for a moment he's not breathing go get that doctor making me believe for even one second that they're trying to help this person from that movie what's it called matrix hey when you got to korea is all you did watch movies giving someone a hard time for answering the question you literally just asked oh about that grandma why did you get kicked out grandma don't you ever call me that more importantly why did he call her that they look to be about the same age it could be an issue with the dubbing so i'll just give two sins just so we're covered what can we do huh we've got three girls an old man in us it's like the writers didn't remember this guy was there when his team won tug of war against all odds we're all sinners but we're still here aren't we the opening dialogue of every tv sin staff meeting somehow makes its way into the episode you're not worried at all those scumbags you got on your side over there are they people you trust this is all it takes for gihan to get under this asshole's skin a few words about trust and he has him second guessing his loyalties it's not like gihan is a jedi wait is gion a jedi [Applause] joe thinks this slow ass double tap would actually trigger an erase video footage combo what's your reason for being in here the same as you for money does this question even need to be asked isn't everyone here because they need money so in other words joe has time for this number 29 so you're finally here the only thing allowing junhoe to get away with this is an absurd desire to over tackify everything why go with this flawed mask scanning when clearly a password secret handshake or a polite yet awkward butt cheek grab would have been more effective also the scanning happens after they're already in the room when this is definitely a situation where you want to have your accomplices identified beforehand attempting to wake someone up by choking them looks like you were having a nightmare just now he was lying perfectly still why is question saw game i saw on the news doctors don't always perform surgeries sometimes it's the office managers or nurse's aides why the [ __ ] is this scene also there's no way doctors are letting office managers perform surgeries right right we don't have time for this being self-aware doesn't absolve you of your sin in fact it gets you an extra one gihan is having flashbacks that we won't be giving context for until later directly after a scene where there's exposition about the doctor helping some of the squid game workers that we also have no contacts for and based on what happens to the doctor in this episode i'm guessing we'll never have the contacts needed all this is to say that this episode is almost 100 filler which will get you about 12 000 sin won also this really feels like the show is trying to retcon this character mid-season let's not forget this man is a terrible son and a terrible father this sequence is making me remember the mist and damn it i don't like remembering the mist no main character finds out older character he looks up to a sick and or dying cliche oh no it's fine i'm fine i nearly pissed myself that night this transition it's my fault the zombie was missing a kidney this single kidney individual gets the undercover agent disguised as number 29 thinking he's on the right path to find his brother because his brother only had one kidney as well however this isn't his brother that they're talking about in fact it's a female that well we'll see what happens to her shortly anyways the convenience involved to have two people randomly selected for the squid with only one kidney and then one of them is talked about right in front of the one person the story would affect the most is driving me to drink are you happy now squid game granted i'm only drinking lemonade but do you know what all that sugar can do to a person's body so what happened to that zombie what do you think happened to it june damn near blows his cover with this question as everyone in the room goes on to explain that the person he's pretending to be was there for the incident the only reason he gets away with it is that the doctor hangry and needing a nap flips out and on that i call bullsh transporting organs in ziplocks pick up the pace the boat's already here maybe he's right but how exactly would he know that they can't see the boat and no one received a phone call or a text while they were waiting for the dock to be finished his back survives this don't touch it it's a bomb they made this passage so the vips could escape in an emergency since number 28 is assuming for the moment that this is the real number 29 then why would he feel the need to feed this exposition to him the real number 29 would already know all of this now show me yours title of my sex tape let's get you washed up before anything else show haunts me to believe that seven people managed to silently enter this room in the time it took for this guy to turn around i'm gonna spare you from having to listen to this man's description of events all you need to know is that it starts with necro and ends with philia and i get the vibe the show is going for but yuck would we have done that to a guy that's where you draw the line now i give the writers credit for adding layers to even the minor characters but when you lead with corp sex homophobia comes across as a positive attribute like we should be kind of happy he's not willing to [ __ ] every corpse do you see the corner you've painted us into go check the list if you still don't trust me i really want to move past this scene but this just sounds like he's keeping a list of dead bodies he's not willing to necromance whether you sell the dead bodies organs or eat them or whatever i don't give a damn or whatever like i don't really want the show to elaborate but i do but i don't but i kinda do these people suffered from inequality and discrimination out in the world and we're giving them one last chance to fight fair and win this insight that the front man isn't just a faceless administrator and might have motivations beyond money and mindless killing really adds depth to the story along with an interesting social justice question about fairness in modern society and i think i like it now take a sinha off before i change my mind this episode has so many people being in places where they don't belong and i'm starting to believe that no one actually works here it's kind of like that episode of unbreakable kimmy schmidt where we find out cats isn't a real musical this [ __ ] just discards this mask on the ground like someone else is not going to have to pick it up not going to show it but it's the old bullet removal with a knife cliche choosing black walls for an interior room with no windows instead of something more light and airy you know to really open up the space june ho is in what looks like a very small document room by himself but continues looking around with a flashlight instead of just turning on the lights if there are cameras in here this will definitely draw more attention to your activities and odds are if one of the henchmen at their arcade game workstation even noticed this they'd probably just do the double tap video erasure move because that's just what you do when you see a member of the redman group doing something they shouldn't three ring binders also why write the labels on the binders in english when the rest of its contents are in korean anyway the writers have this shadow hide the picture of june ho's brother because despite the fact that most people in the show are wearing masks it's necessary to keep teasing us with the idea that we might recognize who he is episode does not contain a squid game not standing people in numerical order unless this is some diagonal bullsh like that player profile for in which case still bullsh what should we do begin the next game i mean what are the options here watch tiny people do a tiny performance put smash bros on one of the screens erase 212 from the very fabric of time and space was playing the next game ever really in question what the [ __ ] is this guy looking at i know the colors and artistry of the room are captivating but there's five bodies hanging there you're trying to figure out if the walls are tea green or mint also just a reminder that the game organizers who had the foresight to create and install a 50-foot high corpse mobile in the escher room somehow didn't know there was an underground organ harvesting operation going on right under their noses for weeks through an impressive feat of fortune slash fortitude june ho has managed to sneak onto the island kill a guard replace him in his job and snuck into the head honcho's office all without being caught i could almost believe that if he wasn't also texting his bestie pictures and messages that would get this entire operation shut down on a network that should be constantly monitored get your parental controls figured out before your pink army starts doing all sorts of shady stuff on there like googling the phrase pink army this phone rings nine times if your phone rings more than four times before letting me leave a message i'm never speaking to you again making phone calls what's wrong are you sad i was but i've quickly moved back to angry the more over-the-top and cliched your character gets in fact i've probably crossed over into vexed if you're truly wanting to know for this game you will be playing in teams of two for an operation that just gave another big fairness speech i'll just note that you 100 knew you were eventually putting them against each other and yet you say teams of two instead of groups of two for maximum deceit hypocrites and yes we're hypocrites too in fact being hypocrites ourselves makes us hypocrites for calling you hypocrites and what was i saying again please look around and find someone you wish to play with oh great now i'm having flashbacks to my childhood all those darting eyes trying to decide who's going to be their partner i don't want to be the last pick i promise i can move as fast as the ball does pick me please mom shake hands to show you have become partners there can only be two players per team force monogamy and it was adam's rip the lord used to make eve after all and that's the reason that we're choosing men 244 and the entire patriarchy survives this also you've witnessed hundreds of people murdered by a 10-foot doll with laser eyes you've pulled people to the death in a game of tug-of-war and licked a sugar cookie until it came to a satisfactory conclusion dude there is no god you were someone who looked like they would come with me title of my sex tape do you really think you can win without me on your team rhetorical questions he's a jerk he's just gonna throw you under the bus 212 is going off again and no one is stepping in to stop her for the love of all that is nuanced and substantial won't a single writer have a guard tape or mouse shut or something the lack of action from these workers is being noted in my latest escape room yelp review we are gumbo roll marbles should we do this to make it official ah yes the holy pinky promise the most solid of foundations for any friendship it's nice to have such a hopeful and wholesome episode for once 10 marbles and we can create our own game as interesting as this choose your own death venture marble madness is shouldn't there be some guidance from the powers of the bee that encourage an entertaining show for the audience that may or may not be watching or exist or not honestly we're five episodes in now shouldn't the show of at least address the purpose of all this just a tiny bit so you guess if i'm holding even a rod which one you think is in here wait ollie has never played this game and you're teaching him the only rule here is no violence apparently so just tell ali to give all his marbles to you hide them around the room then tell them to count for 29 minutes the first one to find them all wins you get a one and enjoy to find wine by now who wouldn't enjoy a post-murder merlot one of us is gonna die here so it doesn't matter what we tell each other no one can really embarrass themselves anymore no it just means that you spend your last 10 minutes on earth wallowing in a pit of embarrassment after admitting to that time you oh that was close i almost told you about that time i swallowed my pet goldfish and blamed it on the cat damn it i think he's got dementia does that mean that he's out or he's not gonna play so that means he forfeited right even if that were the case what does gihan think forfeit means does he think that discount will riker will be excused from this game whether gihan realizes it or not he's trying to convince the guard to put a bullet in number one's head some gong boo you turned out to be [ __ ] god damn it will you please just pull yourself together on that thanks squid game for inspiring me to gronk spike my own grandmother so she'll finally play call of duty with me isn't that what i'm supposed to learn from a scene where gihan needs marble gandalf into a stone wall like pizza dough to make him play games with him sorry i find the lessons on this show to be a bit elusive sometimes you people said we're equals what is this i think we should play a new game here huh request accepted so this is when you choose to promote equality not when it comes to even teams a fair share of food or preventing a midnight massacre but rather when a sore loser wants to change a game to something he thinks he'll have a better chance of winning does equality mean something else in this universe how do the neon fencers even know when to intervene are they dispensing order and justice on their own like some sort of salmon suited vigilantes everyone wants to be batman but no one wants to put in the work to be trapped in a cave full of bats as a child oh yeah and the parents murdered an alley thing we take turns throwing marbles till you make a shot that lands in the hole i dug over there i'm pretty good at getting things in the holes huh if that was meant to be a sex reference i have many questions about how this gentleman approaches coitus none of which i wish to have answered go to mojito and have a glass of maldives really pretending everyone should know the random movie quotes you drop into conversation what are you people han dope i uh i still have one more there's one guard per team and all they have to do is keep track of who runs out of marbles first and squid guard here couldn't even manage that if this is his work ethic then he should try and go look for another job no triangle look look i'm doing my best was that a punch replay that yep clearly a closed fist with enough force to move him violence is against the rules shoot this man guard guard do they take marble bribes using two bullets when one could have done the trick is a modicum of efficiency per mortality beyond their accountability damn your stories are a bit too dark even for me eli roth which one did you just say this show man just when i think it's going to descend into simple battle royale death matches it delivers the most heartfelt nuanced morally complex episode of the bunch centered by this devastating moment where gehun decides to lie to an old man to save his life after having an in-depth conversation about being bffs it's brilliant but it destroys me not because i'm weak and sad about the death and stuff just because it's so good i have to keep giving back these damn sin one your pouch there it's too dangerous to keep it out these people are bound to go crazy before the end who knows what'll happen then we know exactly what will happen then the guards will step in and shoot anyone being violent or cheating which ollie also knows but gives over his marbles regardless man this show is honestly great right up until it decides to make some characters exactly the right amount of naive for the villain's plan to work using your mouth to tear the t-shirt you've been wearing through several days of murder games without any laundering service hole in the ground marble drop marble blowing excitement this marvelously convenient marble that blue one that went in that's mine [ __ ] i mean sure but did you agree ahead of time about secondary contact rules everyone here is making the ship as they go you know because of fairness and integrity and such here how's that as it is with marbles so it is with life ollie ends up dead because he doesn't take the time to check his sack stay safe kids and check your sack regularly [Music] at this point the marbles in this bag have all been switched out for rocks but when he shakes that bag it makes the distinctive noise of glass marbles hitting each other i don't care if it's in on the foley artist or the show argue all you want the sin is sound there is no guard following ali and i just spent five minutes thinking of a better way for ollie to use his unguarded time the finer points are beat up a guard fake marbles blame shifting more beating a double-crossing fake trade all ending with the rose-colored asses duped into running out of bullets from inefficiency i realized after assembling a flow chart and storyboard that i'd rather just move on and get to the end of this as quickly as possible why is no one who's losing in these games just sticking it to their opponent by refusing to play not a single person pulled the if i can't win then neither of us will card let me see darn it i'm out of marbles what should i do huh probably been shot by an overzealous guard but they only seem to be actively watching the secondary characters so i guess you're safe for now and go meet your mother and then make a whole show about how it happens you could call it how i became acquainted with your maternal parent i bet it's a hit i'm up i'm honored that the guard gave you this chance to say your final words instead of just shooting you immediately like every other losing player they totally valued your character moment more than consistency logic i'd be honored too what kind of nonsense is this makes no sense at all direct quotes from a writer's room argument about the logic of there only being one battle still going on and no other panic around the room in the final minutes of this game somehow makes it into the episode take it it's yours anyway i know there was a little more to it but this match basically ends the same as the previous one with one player just throwing it to the other one couldn't gihan have won it all in a unique way like jenga or cribbage or exploding kittens ganbu always share everything with each other no matter what finally an explanation for the best man's wildly inappropriate request at my brother's wedding reception it's okay skip [Music] powerful stuff glad the show would never undercut its impact with a story twist later can you even imagine oh come on squid game did you have to start off the next episode by reminding us that 199 is gone it was traumatic enough when it happened the first time i spent so much time already processing through it in the 4.8 seconds you gave me before you fired up the next episode dumb watches make sure you catch up the vips will arrive soon show momentarily acts like the urgency of this matter is predicated on the arrival of a bunch of jerks that want bottle service but follows up with no one frontman included doing anything differently than they were before so in the end this was just an fyi to the viewer you're looking at me like you've seen a ghost are you okay oh my what a plot twist did the writers really expect us to believe a main character is going to be randomly killed off screen of course not so it'd only be shocking if they did i'm giving the show a sin for teasing such a bizarre exit for this character and not following through with it and yes if they'd followed through with it i'd give it a sin for just being bizarre welcome to tv sins hope you enjoy your stay hey this guy knows about it the weakest link trying to defend your favorite game show by finding one other person who's heard of it before are you in here right now looks like today's not squid game will be hide and seek at least that's what i assume considering the front man is essentially doing a long-winded version of ready or not here i come instead of you know just looking for the intruder without giving up the clear advantage known as the element of surprise you made one mistake i always put the receiver down the other way running the receiver cord across the phone you monster also even if it's intentional i love how the aha got you measure you put in place is phone receiver orientation as opposed to things like security cameras motion detectors are actual functioning human guards what's a cop doing here without a partner how do you know he doesn't have a partner just because you know he shot that bullet and someone fell for your super high-tech phone receiver setup doesn't mean there couldn't be another person with him i'm sure you have lots of questions it's not too late to come out and talk i can't imagine juho has many other questions in this moment aside from why are you trying to have a conversation with me that being said the come out and let's have a talk line frequently used by villains would make a more compelling scene if people occasionally took them up on the offer they actually had a chat and reconciled their differences but this doesn't happen it never does stop putting this in your stories leaving the store and every other door in this area unlocked we found a body this call alone coming in just in time to prevent this showdown is sinfully convenient but on top of that a moment ago the front man was so convinced someone was in here he was talking to them and all it took to derail this partially completed search was a call about finding a singular body on an island dedicated to murder gaming where there also happened to be an unsanctioned organ harvesting scheme going on in tandem what i'm saying is their body's literally everywhere but he assumes they found the droid he's looking for just because the plot needs him to also he never says hello or anything when he picks up the guy on the other end just starts talking anyway whether or not walkie-talkies have evolved to silently notify you when someone answers this is just bad two-way radio etiquette over i know i've mentioned it before but even with more of the beds missing and this much of these stick game squid figures showing not a single person has mentioned the possibility of maybe looking at the wall to see which game might be next making out with your potato also competing in a winner take all death game with your friend and or spouse undeniably makes you an [ __ ] so i can understand after the last game while the production team chose potatoes for the scene there's no reason to guild the apple blossom but doksu aggressively eats this egalitarian root fruit to emphasize that he is the king [ __ ] and deserves a sin as well and yes i know that fruit is spelled wrong and then potato is not a fruit and then i'm the real king [ __ ] yummy this is what it looks like when crabs have been placed on a body by a set designer in real life they're much more likely to swim alongside you while encouraging you to suck face with anyone who may be accompanying you [Music] if a body comes along you must scan it we found this police id on him which brings the question why did he put his id on the guard he killed i mean sure he probably didn't want to be carrying around with him in case he was caught but what's the plus side to having it found on the corpse just check that thing off separately you want to start from the beginning again false dichotomies holy sh did you hear the sound that mask made when he put it down i'm not even sure how to approach the science on this one mostly because i slept through my materials science class twice and then changed majors but there's no way anyone would be wearing this thing for any amount of time i mean i love the flare but they have to be so impractically heavy that the only possible reason these fanciful furry fetishists could wear these things for the entire episode is that this sound was the result of bad communication with the foley artist americans oh lord be my shepherd be my guy this prays on for some time trust me the screens we have at home are plenty big but nothing beats seeing it with your own eyes oh this is just like in the nba playoffs where they don't sell the in-person tickets for the first few rounds what's that they do sell tickets to every single nba game weird bringing in the vips after half the experience is already over just makes so much sense oh it's uh such a beautiful number 69. oh you're dirty you'd think that when the english speakers came in that maybe the painful voice acting of the dubbed version would subside for a bit as we listen to characters speak with their own voices you'd think so but you'd be wrong so very wrong the fact that these colored platforms for the vips aren't all circles squares or triangles is an absolute travesty of consistent design you made the buttons on the security camera controls these shapes but for this you go with what a cloud shape a cloud god dammit just tell us about the next game how long you're going to string us along like this half leopard mask [ __ ] would be excellent at squid game sins he's in a bad mood because of 69. well that's just counterintuitive looks like a bridge of some sort aside from revealing that the people behind the murder olympics are just a bunch of rich dicks nearly all of the vip dialogue is just filler to convey their vague interest in the whole production i wish the show would just give all these guys some gold-plated apples and move on to the bridge to squidobithia game already please make your way down the steps and choose one of the mannequins that you see presented before you once you've chosen take the corresponding vest i'm skeptical about whether the process of choosing the order is actually all that fair but i'm more annoyed that they're making the already numbered individuals choose another number so the sin is excessive numbering there are plenty of other variables but i think the order in which they compete matters most does position well if i can't do 69 i'll try 96. ah yes the lesser-known sexual position where partners lay back-to-back with their butts resting on the back of each other's necks also known as the cheeky reiki it's really popular in certain parts of the florida panhandle from what i understand there's 16 people left and there are 16 numbers once again our hero coming through with the razor sharp observations the amount of people in this episode stating obvious things for our benefit is astonishing i can't tell if the show is all of the sudden becomes stupid or just thinks we are but either way here's your sin not performing the cheeky reiki correctly they always take the middle numbers first less than five minutes ago you saw this setup and had no clue what this game was but now you're familiar enough with it to know what the players always do okay do it i can't confirm this due to the fact that they're all wearing animal masks and that the line was said off-screen but i'm nearly 100 sure that was bojack horseman and now i'm upset he didn't get a bigger role in the show and now as always i'm choosing my number last second to last 96 if you were choosing your number last there'd be no choice in fact no one chooses their number last they take their number last really the person who chooses last is the one before the final note i've talked so long i've disproved myself again haven't i these vests shouldn't be the same color as the guard's outfits phew saved it this whole number selection process accounts for six minutes of this episode's run time that's around ten percent i don't even give my manager ten percent and this scene is definitely doing less work than carl oh wow it's bigger title of doctor who's sex tape also did they think the contestants were going to play on that model bridge what is this a squid game for ants the fifth game is glass stepping stones all right glass stepping stones classic children's playground game good call the tempered glass stepping stones are strong enough to hold the weight of two people however the normal glass will break even if just one person steps on it don't worry about the fact that you're all different weights and that there might be two smaller people who weigh about the same as one bigger person the glass has read the script and knows what to do have you ever kicked your feet up on a naked human leopard footstool while sitting up and forward like this put strain on your hamstrings and abs the only reason he's got his leg up there right now is because the set designer was like we spent five hours in makeup on this body pain by golly you're going to use it mister [Music] pain relief that's it keep doing that one after the other yes keep getting lucky just try really hard i saw a poster once that said luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity so now's your chance also i think he's well aware he should keep picking the right one this is like when someone tells you to drive safe thanks aunt susan guess the blindfold kane and ferret idea i had will have to wait for another day 2 to the power 15 times that 1 in 32 768. [Music] i'm surprised no one's intended to make a run for it oh never mind well at least i'm going to send the fact that no one attempts to walk along the red rail sure it's probably against some rule no one knows or that they haven't made up yet and anyone who attempted this would end up being shot down by a drone carrying crossbows or some but if any of that's true we deserve to see it the series shows us all the deadly details we don't want for six episodes but now that we've acclimated to this blood sport they let up you happen to remember what he chose next even if she doesn't certainly one of the other 12 would have been paying close attention you know what with everyone's lives on the line and all right benefits every single person here for each contestant to get as far as possible so i'm befuddled as to why this isn't a more cooperative group conversation if one of those players gets scared and starts to run down the time we're in danger in the back of the line true so my question is what happens if they all die does everyone just go home do the vips get their money back this is shoddy game planning at best there's that sweet sweet squid game visual flair i know and love take a sin off for this gorgeous tracking shot before my goodwill shatters oh please keon has been diligently adding up probabilities and tracking the game and he forgot which one every single person has been stepping on first i get the narrative fun of it but i shall repeat oh please we're in hell here there's no rules in hell citation needed the clock continuity in this episode isn't great but this section here is probably the most egregious at the start of this argument it says 5 46 the show shows them arguing in real time for exactly one minute and four seconds and then shows the clock at 509 having only ticked down 37 seconds i'm not sure what technology allows them to fast forward through time during arguments at double the speed but market that [ __ ] to marriage counselors immediately the art behind them in this room is absolutely pornographic but it's also kind of amazing which means they hired an artist to come out to the hidden death game bunker and paint the adjoining sex room i bet that's how they even stated it on the contract tell me everything you know about the game i'd give all the sins back if he started his answer right now with well it's really one of fincher's underrated gems i've accepted the use of these game pieces to track what's going on in the game but using them to make the shittiest instant replay ever well that's a bridge too far i need you to know you've got such a tiny buying into the line that size is all that matters it's such a common trope and at the end of the day it's just a phallus see now there's a poetic ending for those two i mean it was until you felt the need to clumsily comment on it another student of the bard i had no idea actually it's not shakespeare it's congregate william conway the vips take a break from adding nothing to the episode just to be kind of okay at bard since there is no way these binoculars are doing much good when they have to be held inches from the face because of this mask have you ever tried to use binoculars without holding them right up against your eyes i mean you can see a bit but there's no way you're getting a good look into the neighbor's bedroom that way i mean squid gaming he can't see the squid you can't see the squid gaming i used to make glass for over 30 years uh of course you did the vips and front man have a quick but boring discussion about this guy's ability to distinguish between the different types of glass and conclude this is not fair but how is bringing your own life experiences to the game not fair dukxu brought all his experiences of being a big dumb meanie to the game and used that to his advantage all the time so how's this really any different i suppose this could be a point the show is trying to make saying that they aren't actually all that concerned with the fairness of the games but the way this show goes about conveying this makes it seem more like the front man doesn't even understand the concept of fairness at least that's the only way i can explain a stump speech in episode 5. that was in the report how did i miss that because you didn't even know what this game was until 15 minutes ago also because you're a lazy rich bastard who gambles on people's lives and probably doesn't spend his time researching every last detail of the pawns in your game of viscera but mostly the first thing i see he's given up on the three button design from earlier this season and opted for a more intuitive touch screen quitter okay standing and admiring your murder instead of getting the immediate hell off the death trap i suppose the clock behind them doesn't even matter anymore but it was on for most of the game so we must assume that it's only off now because it's on the same switch as these lights at the opposite end of the bridge and this kind of shoddy craftsmanship is the reason i have to hit all three switches in my living room before i find the right one sharpish explodey glass mcguffin is cliffhangering all over the place making it nearly impossible for me not to immediately watch the next episode show begins with 26 seconds of walking and i'm not really interested in seeing the book of boba fett's squid game person escaping from bad guys has a cell phone but can't find a signal cliche this drawing over here seems to foreshadow the final game and shows just two people fighting but how can they guarantee there only be two people in the final while still maintaining the charade of equality in theory everyone could have survived the previous game if they were lucky enough why did you do that is gihon seriously asking this question i'm not saying yay to murder but i understand how this game is played and i'm not sure gihan does how has he survived this far i don't think intelligence or skill has played a factor it's because you always gotta open your mouth and ask something idiotic hey leave him alone some of us make a career out of doing just that just a dimwit who lives off his mother but you're with me in this place isn't that interesting gihon would be the front man at tv sins why destroy the air tank i get they've got a boat but that's a perfectly serviceable air tank that they could use in the future throw it in the boat if you don't want him to retrieve it the date on this phone says june 29th which makes no sense geon's daughter's birthday was june 8th and he went into the squid games the very next day how's it taking three weeks to get through five games they had some off days between games and most importantly how does the phone still have 12 battery after three weeks i'll call you again soon june hoe is proving to be just another [ __ ] who insists on zoom meetings when a simple [ __ ] email will suffice everything he communicated here would have made more sense by text especially since that's exactly what he does next anyway this 30 seconds of table setting requiring someone to use multiple utensils for one meal why would you ever need three forks or three knives why is this island england tonight's feast is prepared as a token of gratitude do you know what really says thank you a hot shower and some medical attention to a mortal wound and to encourage you all to perform even more splendidly in the final game because nothing encourages a person to be entertaining while fighting to the death for the satisfaction of creepy millionaires more than a heady mix of indigestion and exhaustion he's over there junhoe decides to inexplicably blow his sizable head start by standing in clear view for all to see the plot can only protect you so much sir no one will be seated as these two men play a game of staring with stakes wasting ammo you have him cornered why is the shot police put down your weapons you got that [Laughter] the coast guard will be here soon i don't know where the f did you come from dude i don't even know which way to go and how did he get here so quickly his orders were to bring junho to him so why isn't he chilling on the beach earning 20 you barely get any signal around here i don't know what you tried to send but i doubt it went through call me paranoid but i feel like if i was running a secret death island of murder games i'd want slightly more assurance than barely any signal and i doubt it went through when talking about the dissemination of incriminating evidence one chamber must remain empty and one must be filled with a blank which means that there's only one bullet left in your gun this is actually true but there's no rule that says he isn't allowed to carry extra bullets you know in case he has one of those fancy guns that aren't single use one bullet's more than enough to kill you exactly it's not like juno would be dumb enough to shoot him in the shoulder or something damn it not eating your vegetables i hear that's the key to a long and healthy oh never mind who the hell are you [Music] chinho is actually only ten percent as shocked as he should be considering this is the actor that was referenced by ji yong in the gongu episode sorry squid game if this is like pepper potts referencing how much she likes rdj in the sherlock films and you know we'd send that [ __ ] you know why valid question why would frontman only shoot junhoe in the shoulder he clearly wants him dead so why assume that a non-lethal bullet wound in the following fall into the ocean would definitely result in death now i'm not saying that i'll give all the sins back if juno returns in season two but if he does that's exactly what i'm not saying i would not do so this strap we saw earlier was purely decorative if the goal is to give the players some tlc and rest before the final game to encourage them to be as entertaining as possible why give them a very valid reason to want to stay up all night who's gonna be happy to fall asleep in this situation how is a three-way fight between sleep-deprived players going to be entertaining even worse what if two of them are killed here and now and the vips never even get to see the final game this episode is 67 these three staring at each other and considering the episode is as a whole a good 15 minutes shorter than the previous ones that leaves about three minutes of actual interesting plot development and by interesting i mean not interesting at all putting a knife in your pocket blade up and i would finally start paying attention thinking money makes you a good father pulling a knife out of your pocket handle first after putting a knife into your pocket blade up don't do it that isn't you you're a good person at heart well thanks to you we'll never know now will we because if gihan needs to be reminded he's a good person to stop him from stabbing a man in his sleep he's probably not a good person [Music] say back was never going to be a threat in the final game so wouldn't it make more sense for songwoo to keep her around gion would likely take some stupid risk to protect her that song wu could take advantage of killing her now just gives gihan even more reason to get bloodlusty this sequence slow motions on for all the some time bafflingly there isn't a single doctor nurse or talented butcher that's able to help the front man with his bullet wound [Music] i love you playing a love song while roasting human remains over an open fire welcome to the final game it's the final squid game [Music] please choose a shape triangle or square triangle i feel like gihon should have been immediately disqualified for jumping the squid and picking a shape before being told who gets to pick first kind of a hero are you gihan i believed in you for the final game you'll both be playing squid game so this week's squid game is actually squid game and all the other squid games had non-squid names but had another game been named the title of squid game penny would have been confused by the final game's name also show called squid game goes seven episodes without an actual squid gaming also also roll squid merchants let me explain the rules of squid game showri explains the rules of squid game to us as if we hadn't watched episode one this morning and were immediately compelled to binge every episode all at once once in for not believing in yourself the attacker must enter the squid-shaped cord correction what you meant to say was the attacker must enter the bauhaus interpretation of a squid-shaped court why is he hopping on one foot the attacker is given a handicap show is effectively recreating the worst part of playing any game for the first time which is learning the rules as you play because no one bothered to actually read the instructions the issue is that both characters do know the rules so this frustrating experience is being reserved exclusively for the viewer we always used to play this as kids despite this song woo will not see the very obvious sand in the eyes gambit coming inspector royale we called it no one would be better than me searching the internet and giving up when i find some unconfirmable explanation that has to do with magic the gathering if the show just explained to me why this would be called inspector royale of all the things the show over explains for the sake of the audience this certainly is not one of them sounds so romantic what's it mean saying something sounds romantic without actually knowing it's romantic because you don't speak the language this may not be as bad as the time in paris when i accidentally thanked the man for saying some very vulgar things about my mother but it's still problematic good dream knows the best time to fall oddly enough in tv shows and movies the best time always seems to be during a dramatic fight to the death especially when it's written that way she could have survived they would have treated her gihan dude where have you been who in this entire game has received medical attention when they've required it why does gihan still believe that there are people that give a crap about the well-being of the players even frontman was forced to dig out a bullet from his own damn arm gehan believes that he can kick this knife far enough away that song won't possibly be able to ever reach it again pick up the knife kihan have you ever been watching a fight to the death and wished one of the participants would throw their [ __ ] suit jacket because that might just be the difference between losing and winning no me neither because that would be [ __ ] insane i'm glad this damp squid fight isn't our actual climax to the series but it is the climax to the squid games which i feel like should be something grander than this very sad and clumsy fight and sporadic hopping so many people played with us but now they're instead of ending the fight with some quick stabby stab action song woo feels the need to take a breather and express his motivations just long enough for gehan to muster enough strength to fight back gehan resorts to being a dirty cheating ankle biter in this scene so by the transitive property of slang terms the sin here is still kids the camerawork here seems to be taking on the lofty task of illustrating quantum superpositions with its own schrodinger songwoo thought experiment that is to say until the camera films it he's in a state of being both alive and dead and i'm in a state of being both annoyed and annoyed this game is over yeah that about wraps it up you'd think so but somehow we still have 40 minutes the production team thought that evoking the depressing feeling when you're the last one to finish the final exam made more sense than maintaining a strong security presence in the wake of an infiltration that almost uncovered the whole scheme does he have to take the pig too it was a dream just think of it that way and it really wasn't a bad one for you either okay so i've thought about it as a dream and i can assure you it wasn't bad it was horrific and i will be sleeping with a nightlight for the next few months who are you who are you putting on a mask and gassing a person in lieu of proceeding with an unwanted conversation this gets us in because your mouth is the fifth most uncomfortable place to put a bank card fourth is your third is your second is the region of your and right kind of between the and of course first is a wagon it's been a few days since she's answered her phone i should have stopped by to check on her but i didn't because i'm a terrible friend hey bro just open your eyes show has to take out gihon's mom as well because i wasn't satisfied with the emotional toll that this episode has already taken on me if i wasn't so distraught i'd have considered removing a sin we've got a real barista working for us here as opposed to one of those fake baristas that openly advertise the fact that they are not a real barista and he can make you a cup as well i'm not sure if you'd like it that much jamie diamond over here is a dick to his real baristas why am i here what's wrong gihon is likely one of their most valued customers in they dragged his ass here in person without telling why sir if you want to end up in a deadly life-size game of shoots and ladders with gihan betting on your demise this is exactly how you go about doing it so you see you created your account here quite a while ago and and you haven't made that much effort to contact us since facebook sending me emails because i stopped responding to mobile notifications you see him who billy angel from the netflix original film's a christmas prince heck yeah let's go he must be drunk i mean not necessarily he could simply be exhausted injured or bored to unconsciousness by an increasingly boring finale to a much bench tv show hard to tell i could easily snap your neck right here snapping a neck is a lot harder than it looks in the movies gihon i've seen you fighting while you've got some fire in you i'm not convinced this is something you could do to completion plus suffocating this bedridden old man seems like a much easier option that would yield the same result and thank you squid game for once again putting my browser history on a watch list what will you bet on with that anything doesn't matter you might as well take everything i have it may not matter to him but the writers think it also doesn't matter to us i for one think it would be very interesting to know what illnom on his deathbed would want if he wins the bet why did you do something like this everybody felt that there was no joy in their lives anymore what could we all do to finally have some fun come on guys you know what it's like you and your rich friends are bored with being rich so you think screw it i'm gonna build a giant murder game complex on a deserted island hire a bunch of people dress them in pink overalls give them a shape-based hierarchy and then recruit hundreds of people to fight to the death and jumbo-size children's games while you watch on and place bets on the brutality good times you put us through all of that so you can have fun it seems that you forgot how no one had to play ill nom would be number one at tv since poetic as it may be it is beyond ridiculous that illnom dies at the stroke of midnight and the homeless man is rescued within the same second gloating over a corpse because i know that i'm not going to have as much fun watching us playing show describing the main reason i don't care about major league baseball uh what you're getting done today we're thinking it you're thinking it we're all thinking it the red hair is not choice i'm sure it represents the dawn of a new guihon or because he's breaking free of the societal chains that got him into dead in the squid games to begin with or you know what maybe the guy just [ __ ] wanted to leave him b people that's right this sin goes to you and me for our built-in biases sir do you know my sister very well kihan let this kid wait six months wondering why his sister wasn't visiting him anymore evidently gihan's mopey self-loathing was a higher priority than this kid's well-being this suitcase full of cash certainly is dramatic but it's also impractical why doesn't he give her a check or set up a bank account and give her a card similar to the way he was given the money safeguarding and managing all this physical cash is definitely going to be a pain in the ass so gihan is really being addicted to seongwoo's mom this disembarks for some time still disembarking somehow still disembarking now screw this i'll be back squid game it's a squid game they're a murder murder family all right i'm back oh my goodness they're still disembarking let's play again right now presumably in order to recruit 456 players there has to be more than one recruiter one of the many reasons why it's insane that gihan somehow manages to bump into the very one that recruited him and at the last possible moment before he leaves to see his daughter damn it people we all want a season two why leave it to chance whether by chance or design the finale manages to reflect the entire show a compelling character-driven story punctuated with gratuitous and jarring violence all finished off with a pink bow of oh my goodness i must watch what comes next i loved it i think pretty sure i loved it right but more importantly does anyone understand how to play [ __ ] squid game yet [Music] i don't understand you i have tasted blood before and that is not it i don't believe in jesus the power of christ compels you the power of christ compels you you take the blue pill the story ends you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe you take the red pill you stay in wonderland and i show you how deep the rabbit hole goes call that number why they make your life fun that man is playing galaga thought we wouldn't notice the first rule of fight club is you do not talk about fight club second rule of fight club is you do not talk about fight club look out we're not backing down because we're the power rangers it's more morphing time things have certainly changed around here i remember when this was all farmland as far as the eye could see old man peabody on all of this he had this crazy idea about breeding pine trees you don't know me but why don't you i want to play a i found game i volunteer as tribute i'm getting better no you're not you'll be stone dead in a moment all right as you wish that day she was amazed to discover that when he was saying as you wish what he meant was i love you over the hills and far away teletubbies come to play get me loose get me the hell come on get me out of here come on get me out of here cut me loose damn it do you have a boyfriend no you never told me your name why do you want to know my name i want to know who i'm looking at if you want my mercy shut that hole in the middle of your face and listen don't think i'll go pee right here and now if anyone's gonna piss on him it's gonna be me in prison dinner was always a big thing we had a pasta course and then we had a meal or fish come on the coast we get together have a few laughs the mucus coating the intestinal wall spat them spat them [Music] number 29 sir what's your duty today it's my duty to please that booty this is all we get all right now get mad at them damn days oh no he died did you forget the rules seventh rule fights will go on as long as they have to i would like to extend to you an invitation to the pants party excuse me the party the pants with the pants party with pants brick are you saying that there's a party in your pants and that i'm invited that's it tell us what are you good at i'm the doctor i'm a time lord don't breathe or make a noise if i hear you breathe i'll hurt you down and get you like a fish what's your name old man i'm batman come on don't lose your spirit you were meant to be here tonight this is your time their time is done it's over screw them this is your time now go out there and take it get yourself together and listen i've got you i won't let go hey you you got a visa i bet you don't you're an illegal alien right right somebody said alien she thought they said illegal aliens signed up mr brains you've been captain right look at me i'm the captain now which leads me to my second rule the double tap how do you expect me to operate with all of that struggling damn it scotty it's a rectal examination not an execution it started glaring at me with one of its eyes popping out i saw it in my dream last night he was surprised i thought that body was my dead brother it's okay but that spleen was a spitting image whether you saw the dead body's organs or eat them or whatever i don't give a damn don't you dare talk about pineapple on my pizza ever you have failed me for the last time everybody my hp's their pants it's the coolest you and me will be the best team [Laughter] keep thinking that having men around me would just make me more powerful but but i hate men now [Applause] precious sucks to be you nerd you ever have to see anyone die before this once we had this play go through my town when i was a kid as time went on more and more townsfolk got sick and died soldiers started carrying the dead into piles and lit them on fire that's how my grandpa grandma and older brother all died they burned together simple yes would have survived [Applause] oh why didn't you just go home that's your home are you too good for your home did i say that did i do that hey i remember my name now my name is my name is surprise surprise [ __ ] the king is back that's amazing isn't it mania maniac we found a body where is it somewhere under those bushes was the rest of ray brauer see that that's the price of being in here cost me 14 in a record player i gotta embrace the marble hey who were walking seriously i find it hard to believe the host would miss a night like tonight we didn't want him to know that we were having a game night you know we used to come and we just we don't like him anymore so gentlemen without much further ado i give you [Applause] the derrick zoolanders center for kids who can't read good what is this but recall too that in the first game most of the contestants in the back died after running out of time so i can clearly not choose the wine in front of me what pretty eyes you have to see you with my take your mask off i'd like to take his his face off i admire your luck mister it's congregate william conway tempered glass is made at a heat over 700 degrees pond on it with a hammer and it rings clearer than normal [Music] so glass blood oh there's your problem don't wipe yourself off you're bleeding that gun of yours holds five bullets i know what you're thinking did you fire six shots or only five well i tell you the truth and all this excitement [Music] [Music] and do you know what you're gonna do with all that money once you get out i'm gonna go to disney world what happened what tis but a scratch we know all about youtube you don't go in the water like oh dude some bad hat harry when you cross do you remember what we used to call it the royale with jesus because i was gonna kill you with this this is like when spock had to fight kirk on star trek best friends forced to do battle [Music] missed it by that much he's giving up the prize money right here at the very edge of victory oh [ __ ] way i'm surrounded by idiots what happened what's going on it's like don't you ever shave of course i got you a present it's two gifts in one it's a pen that's also a clock listen carefully i'm not a cat i'm a person just get on that plane it's for your own good where we go from there is a choice i leave to you [Music]

Channel: TVSins

Views: 2,262,230

Keywords: tv, television, tele, tvsins, tv sins, quickest beef owl, eww, everything wrong with, cinemasins tvsins, parody, commentary, reaction, recap, bloopers, tv show sins

Id: CsVSc5jlvjY

Length: 100min 31sec (6031 seconds)

Published: Sat May 21 2022