Devout Christian Accepts Islam after Reading the Quran

oh there's only one wedding members please his messenger of love is Allah there's only one welcome Jesus once his messenger Allah sorry Salaam alaikum greetings a piece Ricardo how you doing welcome to the deed show something that how are you how you been I'm glad living life and loving it life is grand let me ask you the first question everyone's dying to know when someone accepts Islam like why why did you you you obviously you weren't from a family that was Muslim right right out there's an athlete yes grew up Catholic why Jews up to some very good question um someone introduced me to it I was very intrigued I spent about seven and a half months studying it intensely seven eleven and a half month this wasn't like just an emotional day or not it was every day I studied I asked questions I read the Quran in about a week when I got my hands on it and the truth just hit me like a brick and I embraced it some strong story some short condensed version some people I mean they're born in a Muslim family they never read the Quran right right they called Muslims on batteries have you heard that one yeah but we're just Ramadan misses what not but you actually you read it in a week in a week yeah other than coming down I couldn't put it down how'd you get a hold of it I just went to this bookstore and bought it why because I wanted to read it for myself and understand what's in it um how long ago was this well I became Muslim in 1995 so this was in the spring ish of 95 yeah what was it unlike now right like nowadays it's not you know there's trend yet things was a trendy back then to be no and what are those like rappers that were like kind of you know cool if you were looking up to the ark I don't know the ark yeah no there was nothing like that at the time that at least not that I remember and this is pre 9/11 so the whole Islamic awareness in the world was very very low it's very Loki Loki do you think that would have impacted your decision if it was like if that situation was happening now as it was done you think that you know that's a very good question I'd like to think that not because I'm beholding to the truth and when you're beholden to the truth honest with you if I look at my life I grew up in this neighborhood and I hear a condo in Chicago grew up in the north side here and I was running around here acting a fool I had every incentive to ignore religion and just go on living you know la vida loca or mostly those like crazy lies yes vida loca what's that Ricky Martin with his song yeah and so really it's all about what what you what you hold fast to which will we could probably get into later about you know the topic of discussion because it ties into that a lot now you came from a CAF because you're what you have what part of the Latino you have a curriculum my father's Mexican Max and my mother's Puerto Rican okay boricua that's hit Porto Rican yes and how they take a custom to you because yeah well when my brother and I actually took Shahada at the same time and your brother yes older younger he's younger by one year we're like Irish twins so we came home and we broke the news to our parents it was about 7:00 in the in the evening and it turned into a fight until like 4:00 in the morning and okay paint the picture for us all right so your let's back it up again now what was it were you on a spiritual journey what was going on in your life that you wanted to pick up the Quran but you also now many people don't question the faith that they're upon right the religion if it's all the same and they just blend in you know slide it on very good question so when I was a teen going up my parents are not very religious somewhere in the neighborhood of when I was 1516 my parents started become more religious and they urged us to you know follow you know more in their newfound sort of discovery of being religious and at the time I thought well why you know what's the point why what God if God God knows I am a good person why do I need to pray to prove it so I'd a lot of questions as a young man eventually right around the age of 18 I said about trying to answer that question and I studied a lot of religions just just to get the idea of God or not out of my head I wanted to settle is there a god you know should I care or it's just all about science and evolution so that was my first step and I studied many religions Buddha is don't Booty Buddhism Judaism all kinds of things but I never studied Islam which is interesting yeah at this time I came to the conclusion that all religions are a different road to God and you pick pick whatever is good for you and I chose to remain a Catholic and when I read when I read the New Testament I was very touched by the stories in the sayings of isa alayhi Salaam uses yes and I became a devout Catholic so I would go to church every Sunday I prayed every night and this is you know just my own thing I you know I still didn't live any any kind of conservative lifestyle you know but spiritually I was really in tune and then this went on for a couple years and then a friend of mine who's a Latino he's a Colombian Mexican who had become a Muslim introduced me to Islam told me the most basic thing that I didn't know and it took about 10 seconds to tell me the following he said God sent Moses and from the teachings of Moses came Judaism he said then God sent Jesus from teachers teachings of Jesus came Christianity he goes then God sent Muhammad and by the way at that moment when he said God said Muhammad this thing like when often I like God sent Muhammad you know he said from the teachings of Muhammad came Islam and I'm like thinking ok because it up to up until that point I thought maja Muhammadan Islam had absolutely nothing to do with Christianity or Judaism I thought it was a completely you know mute exclusive religion here's a guy in the desert that did something became a good leader among the Arabs created religion that was my impression of Islam at the time so when he said then God sent Muhammad God sent Muhammad then he went back and he said in Islam we believe in Jesus Moses Abraham the angel Gabriel I you guys believe in the angel Gabriel yes believe in Jesus you guys and I was just absolutely blown away and having been through the studies of many religions previously it was very natural for me to then just study one more now how I was guided you know a lot while I'm how I'm again only only God knows how I was why I was guided in this way perhaps I needed a pre transformation before I was introduced to Islam and the rest is history from there I just went on this seven and a half months long study intense and it entailed some heartbreak because you know when you're when you're already devout some people come to Islam they weren't really deeply connected to their original whatever their spiritual affinity affinity was and some people are really really devoutly faithful and when that happens you first have to undergo a sort of heartbreak and it's very difficult it's a very difficult time yeah but I got through it and I just wanted the truth and you know I was guided and I'm happy I'm Kathy never looked back it's the best thing that's ever happened to me that's what people should like you just said truth be out for truth and sometimes it's like a filtration process some things and you have to relearn in the essence of learning some things you learn and they're not necessarily right so you have to be willing to relearn some things let go of some things absolutely and and if and if the goal is truth you're going to have an easier time and what I like and many people they like is that just makes sense like you mentioned Moses and then from there you know the people stand off and they start they created this Judaism which Moses he never he never preached taught Jesus never taught Christianity or called people to worship Him but they all submitted themselves to God like Abraham he whereas God Almighty says he wasn't a Jew or Christian but he was one who submitted himself to God so that just makes sense all the prophets they submitted themselves to God that's just one word in Arabic Islam submission to the will of God that's all I want to do I want to keep it simple I don't want to pray to a human being I want to pray to st. idols icon statues just to God right right some people get fat they get blown away it can't be that simple but it's not simple it is it is isn't it and you know what's what's fascinating about this journey was that I was praying to God to help me defend my religion help me defend Jesus help me defend the Bible and every day some I would discover something new to the contrary and I would have certain questions but we know I go to bed that night and I just well what about such and such and you know go to sleep the next day the very first thing I would find is the answer that question I mean was really uncanny now when you say you you were print you're praying to God what do you mean very good question you know a lot of people ask me how do you how do you think that why do you think you were guided why do you think that you were sort of chosen you know it's God's will whom whom he guides and I could say that the one reason why I think I discovered Islam and was allowed to embrace it is because as a Catholic it just didn't make sense to me to pray to Jesus to keep on him I always felt like okay so I did believe in the Trinity I believe that there's a Father the Son the Holy Spirit but in time you believe that of course at the time before I knew anything about Islam I wholeheartedly believed in the Trinity but intuitively I directed my prayers to the father I didn't really direct my prayers to the son yeah you know so I had a sort of element of tawheed in me and if this oneness of uniqueness of the one God even though I was practicing something you know the partnership of God and I think that that is probably when I say I prayed too you could in my mind I was directing my prayers to the father yeah as a Catholic too without intermediaries you I did not direct my prayers to Jesus yeah in my mind in my heart that is what I believe and talking I have some experience in talking to people that was a turning point in their life when people asked the crater alone Don Almighty guide them he guided them yes but as soon as they started to put a partner next to God they started to put an intermediary between them and God that stopped the guidance but when they did what you to just pray to God alone guide me guide me guide me the guidance came it did it did and this is all in hindsight at the time I did not understand the importance of this it was just an intuitive thing that I did you know that's what it that's what I did we're more we got more people got to do that that's absolutely human comes natural because these things are taught you know I think I think Christians ought to do it even as an experiment have you thought about go you go to the you know go to like in Spanish we say al done you know that the don this is the the main guy you know I I say for example if you want to raise do you go to the employee or do you go to the boss great point no you go to the boss for a raise and just as an experiment just try it you know God if you you know if you want if you really want to guide me to whatever the truth is ask God directly in your mind in your heart and put everything else aside Jesus the Holy Spirit put it aside put everyone else to the side see what happened was the one who created you would take a break and right back with more anywhere welcome back to the D show on some great advice I love it some real simple easy to do because we're here for a short time we don't know when the conductor is going to call our number we're on a train and you can have to get off to the next stop and that's the next life and it doesn't make sense we just die and then what just turn to dust and that's what Islam calls us to think about the reality of this life that is short you thought about it what's the purpose of life where we go when we die and it just makes sense to ask the one who's the owner of life who created life to guide us like you did you become a Muslim one who submits to the will of God and now as I say often all hell breaks loose at the house UK at home yes and your brother were you guys like doing this simultaneously you and your brother yeah so my brother he told you about it you told no I told him about it so I did all the work and I would just come and tell him about it and he trusts trusted me and just followed follow along with me but I pretty much did all the work yeah now I'm going to kind of jump around a little bit you you also you went through some you got married yes shortly after or were you were married at the time no I was not married at the time I married later how much later did you get married on about 26 years old if I remember let me see 20 20 28 now there's some struggles I mean it's like you come into Islam now you got to do some housecleaning right let's say you might have had some stuff up you know some Saints and stuff you gotta get rid of all that all right you got it maybe your fridge maybe you got some alcohol some wine coolers you gotta get rid of that some simple cleaning some adjustments maybe you were yes people would pray through Jesus now you praying to the one Jesus pray to simple stuff maybe you had some bad character I cussed words people cursing and swearing not keeping your promises you gotta make some final adjustments right absolutely you're carrying some baggage from the past and some of us are still it's it's a lifetime struggle to become a better hit it is that's absolutely right sometimes we get into relationships now and we think okay now a Muslim the struggle stops did it continue of course the struggles continued yeah and you know old habits die hard some people are able to undergo a massive transformation as for short on a time they kind of jump in you know two feet I was more of a gradual adjuster you know I didn't begin saying uh doing all my prayers or on time and you know it took it took time to work the the way of life into my character and my habits but how long did it take until you you establish the prayer in your life um five times a day how long it took years to be on here of you it took years I've been Muslim now for 22 years it took somewhere between five and seven years in in over - well I'm on Mars even going to see the dirt once you establish it big difference yes big difference in the difference that I can seen and again this is now in hindsight is that it wasn't until after I made these changes and made them permanent that some rather life-altering things happen to me for example you know divorce is an example sometimes they're bad sometimes you know people don't fix something unless they understand it's broken you know and you know when we undergo a calamity in our lives it's actually a blessing you know when people people think that when you pray when you you know when you give in charity and you fast that the expectation is that your life in this world is going to improve that's not necessarily true because sometimes what you actually need is to hit a calamity in order to wake you up and either seek answers or be directed in a way that's better for you plus we all know that when you suffer you're actually wiping out bad deeds in your book so there's a double benefit you know you're you're cleaning up some bad deeds and taking care of your accounts in this world which is much better and at the same time you're being directed to something else so the you know I would say that and it hasn't all been bad but sin then it sets that's when the the important events in my life that have happened is after establishing your prayer and being more committed to being a better a better Muslim it reminds me of and that's why like when you take time you study the history the study of the righteous predecessors and people who at that time were lost pleased with them you know these other people they accepted Islam there's so many valuable stories for example when the boycott happened in Mecca how would these people like try to connect like okay we just accepted a truth now we're being boycotted we're eating leaves we're like being oppressed and at the end of the day you'd think like hold on the truth why am i eating leaves like they had no boycotted they're being oppressed but at the end it became victorious so many people like to the struggles now no way can you equate many of this everyone has their own obviously individual struggles and we don't not undermining those many people when things get really tough and those things are meant to make us not break us you went through some of those troubles and through those struggles that you went through you went on exploration now a journey of seeking more knowledge and you didn't just like leave your game absolutely some people Muslims even they end up hitting this really deep area in their life and they just you know struggle that they just can't wrap their mind around why is this happening to me why why why why why I just have accepted a truth why they can't understand it nor do they grow from it to limit themselves and they lose patience and they lose the Deen they do and they loot they lose the practice and you know I'll tell you what's scary yeah is if you're not practicing even if you're not Muslim if you're just not spiritual and things are going well in your life that's scary because what that could possibly mean is that Ilan has mercy is giving you your paradise in this life because you're not going to getting anything in in the next life because that's what you chose yeah so when if you're not praying if you're not fasting if you're not accepting the oneness of God and you you do have a good life and you're not suffering things because God is not giving you the calamities that lead you to a better guidance so when you are suffering drama in your life we should look at it as a mercy this is you know you know the Quran talks about the sailors in the sea who won that when the waves rise up like canopies over their ships their hearts are very very sincere and when when God says their hearts are sincere he knows every little iota of what is in your heart so that is a very profound statement for God to say that your heart is very sincere these are sailors who and at any other time didn't care about God but in that moment they were very sincere in their in their supplication save us save us and but but then it says when they get back to the land right they go back to their old ways and forget about God but you know the point is is that the calamity of the sea brought them closer to God and this is how the calamities are in life so if you're not suffering calamity that's and you're not praying and doing the right thing that's that's pretty scary to me have you seen have you have any people that you've known friends or anybody that they were in the deen and really press seem like they're from the outside it was like wow brother GU was beard he's like you know really seem like he's at the Masjid praying but now like where's his brother he's back at the club he's maybe got some you know pictures of him you know doing some things or the system she was in the cop she was like really full force you follow me and all of a sudden it's off it's totally gosh you even just like downgrade deja or she just took everything like completely fell off everything is off completely fell off the wagon what what happened you know the way that I've come to understand this phenomenon it really goes back to this very simple principle and let me just say shine and I don't want to I'm just painting his picture because it's not all about just the appearance it's really about you know exactly yeah so I'm just painting this too you know so people going to that's what we attribute but it's not just about the facade it's really more about the exact well go ahead and you know you're hitting the nail on the head I mean the principle is that and this goes back to psychology yeah and how it ties into the Dean and it really is but boils down to this if there is anything external to me that modifies my sense of value as a person if I say hey Eddie do you think you're a good guy and you say yeah I think I'm a good guy I'm a good person you know why why do you think you're a good guy now whatever the answer to that question is is going to be many there going to be many reasons I'm this I'm that I do this I do that whatever if any of those things net lists are external to you then then they're mean means that there are external factors that modify your value your perception of yourself some things are internal well the internal things are things like honesty patience gentleness intelligence external things are like things like money your looks your status your your degree you know you have a PhD your title these are all external things the more these external things make you feel good or bad it leads to disaster uh-huh this is by the way this is - this is in the core of the what modern-day psychologists consider a healthy psychology and it happens to be at the core of the deenis as well yeah so when you look at you know how the quran has many scientific revelations well a lot of people don't know is that the Quran also has a lot of psychological revelations yeah and it's very fascinating but that's what it is if people are tied to external factors then that's when you will see that the facade is not what it is on the inside what did you just prove that through that was that because now the let's say the sister who was wearing you know implementing the Deen and then now she's on you know whatever snapchat or what and she's people are like she's holding up the Hennessy bottle was that that at the end was her her love for that what she she thinks now that leads to happiness right that was so connected to you know the facade of happiness that it goes back to what you're saying these material things and that's material temporary yeah anyone anything external another is aster another person is external to you one of the biggest problems is approval seeking so if I'm worried about you know wow you perceive me as a person if that's what's important to me then I'm going to sacrifice the internal things I'm going to sacrifice my integrity internally in order to craft my image because I need you to I need your perception to be good of me I need you to think I'm a good guy yeah so you know they're variations of what an external focus is versus an nvidia being extrinsically to a focus versus intrinsically focused and what you see on the outside is the route is usually because there's some external focus that leads that person to go and do these things and they sacrifice the truth they sacrifice what is what is correct I want to ask you some more questions we're going to come back having a nice conversation with Ricardo here and through your journey you also you learned some valuable lessons we're going to touch upon those when we come back and she'll ah God willing don't go anywhere back here on a gene show Ricardo you took a very valuable lesson or lessons through your your marriage you were talking somewhat and people then coming to you always a friend's family and they trust in your advice that you kind of you've been giving people and through your experiences and that's the thing like that's fascinating someone can have a feel that they're there in right but they didn't experience all of these other things they didn't hit they didn't go through the grind that someone might have went to you really went to a grind I did yeah and you learned a lot and people are really benefiting friends and other colleagues and people who you've shared some your experiences with and they're like really trying to get you to write a book about it yeah sure I talked to us about this so I went through a time in my life where I began to do a lot of self development and trying to figure out what it is where it is that I need to improve and some answers about relationships in particular and what I found was absolutely astonishing the interesting thing was that the information that I found was scattered in different places and I also had to figure out what was good information what was bad information and I put this all together in terms of like an understanding in my head and over time I you know I implemented it in my own life became a much better person over it and I began to it began to come up in conversation with people and people very fascinated by it and then they would implement some of the things that I talked about and would come back to me and say oh my gosh it worked exactly as you said this have evolved around psychology it was its a psychology ecology specifically in terms of relationships yeah and particularly marriages yeah so this information that I found like I said it's all over the place so the the one question that I got repeatedly was where did you get this information how did you learn this it's like well it's all over the place that you know configured I'll put it all together well is there something that is our video that I can read or watch and unfortunately there isn't there is no single place that I have found yet that has put this information together in the way that I have come to understand it now there are other frameworks out there there are other Muslims who who are in this par in that profession who have come with from which are great and this is just a different way to think about it and the way and I'll tell you what was one of them one of the game changers for me was discovering that when it comes to as men when we deal with women discovering that what women say they want is not necessarily what they respond to emotionally that's very important today I guess it's worth repeating what women say they want yeah is not necessarily what they will respond to emotionally and when I discovered this it was in the context of explaining why there's so much bad information out there because what they do is though they'll come and they'll at they'll do surveys they'll do studies and they'll they'll ask women about their relationships what is it that you want what is it that you want your husband to do how do you want him to be what kind of man are you looking for if you're single bla bla bla all these things and what happens is these women they answer these questions truthfully and genuinely but when they're asked those questions they are not in the midst of any emotion any heightened emotions they're pretty neutral women are just as logical as men you know so they give very reasonable logical answers but what happens is when a situation comes along that tweaks their emotion they respond in a way that is contrary to what they said when they were in logical mode does that make sense so these are modern overrides the way override the logic so the studies surveys and books are misleading because they're based on answers from women who are answering questions when they're in logical mode so to speak so understanding that was a big game-changer for me because you read articles you read books you watch videos and you even speak to people speak to women your mother is your aunt whoever it is that gives you advice and it just doesn't fit it just doesn't work and so you find that there are some people who have kind of caught on to this and start to deviate from traditional relationship and advice and counseling and start to explore other ways and this is where all this uh you know that's one of the game changers for me and I just when I explain this to men and these conversation back to how this got out then it's kind of the guy starts thinking oh wow that's really interesting and then it really changes their approach and then I start see I can give examples of these things and then when they implement it they have a much better awareness a much better understanding of why their wives are behaving this way why is it that when they do this it doesn't work so on and so forth yes total GameChanger what do you mean there's some things that you you you write about that are very very interesting if you can elaborate on how women are subconsciously wired to test men and that you know they're not even aware that they're testing them and the constant consequences yes there's so many good ones in there that's a very good one so this is what they call there's there's there's two kinds of subconscious tests one is called a compliance test and the other one is called a congruence test basically what this means is that so if we if we if we go back to the days of the caveman okay the when women sought to be with a man who made them feel secure who was a provider it was all about physical the taller bigger stronger man is the one who would make them feel more safe and protected today that know longer applies so what we have is we have a biology that is fundamentally incompatible with the social establishment of today because we're not in the food chain okay we don't face these sort of like physical natural challenges that we did in the past so what gives a woman the feeling of safety and security is no longer about physical they can be with a guy like me I'm a short guy I'm five foot tall and that really doesn't even matter now if I was living back then I would have a hard time what matters is they derive their safety from social psychological means so what they do is they evaluate a man in terms of how they feel emotionally can is this is this man emotionally and socially capable of being a good protector and provider so the way that they do this and it happens naturally and I've seen it all the time but men aren't really set up because we're less of emotional beings and not and not only because of that but because we naturally are inclined to the physical way of things we're all about you know MMA and that kind of thing so the the kind of test that they do and they do this subconsciously so a congruence test for example will be when a woman does something that kind of rubs you the wrong way and if you have an emotional reaction over it then you're really not as stable as you may seem to be yeah so sometimes I could come across as like you know challenging you with something you know oh you know you know for example it was one time where a person said oh you know this this ice cream is all mine and she says oh you don't like to share huh you know that's kind of like sticking you with a little you know well if you get taken aback by that then you're having an emotional reaction and if and if you have an emotional reaction it's sort of a turn-off yeah you know I mean you think this is RIT in the times we're living it has taken like there's a good documentary that talks about the losing of the man like do you feel in your studies that they talk about how the society in the collateral is just like taking the man out of man there's no more veteran there's a a degradation of masculinity today and that that's what's happening and there's a lot of reasons for that but the effect is is is this that men tend to have a more more of an emotional reaction and and by the way this was this was one of my own weaknesses that I didn't understand so that's so what happens is if you're if you can't if you don't deal with that properly you fail what's called a congruence test yeah so you're you're you're calm cool and collected self is not congruent with your internal emotional ability and if you're in congruent there then it makes it mix it makes her feel unsafe because she doesn't know when you're gonna be set off she doesn't know if you're going to be snapping you know yeah so and but they but you know when I when I talk to women about this or like do we really do that like they don't even understand even know that they do this intuitively so women are what I like to call emotional ninjas they're born with it they just know I mean they are so emotionally savvy they run circles around us we are the ones that have to acquire the knowledge we have to analyze it in the way that we think and figure it out so they do this subconsciously the other one is called a compliance test in a compliance test they this is definitely definitely don't do this on purpose this is when a woman will give a man a directive and it could be any kind of command or instruction and if they do it then they're compliant well what happens is subconsciously this means that the man is not really leading he's not he's not in a position of leadership and they will never say this you know they'll never say well he's a weak leader if I tell him what to do when he disobeys yeah we'll never see it it's just kind of like an intuitive vibe and you know by understanding that you know you catch yourself you catch yourself doing these things and portraying yourself as a weak leader someone who doesn't have a backbone you don't you can't stand up for yourself you're a doormat all these things happen and you know these are subconscious tests that they do without even realizing it that they just kind of intuitively figure you out how about the way you talk about good feminism bad feminism yes you elaborate on that so good feminism is when the idea that women should have equal rights that women should earn the same wage that men do for the same task for the same job that women have the right to vote own property I mean these are all things the right sort aslam do and yet exactly if Islam is a very feminist friendly you know way of life bad feminism is when there is a resentment associated with men having a patriarchal society when there's this resentment inside that causes women to hate sort of hate the idea of a man being in power or in leadership or even hereditary yes exactly this leads to the difference between equity versus equality where equality tries to make two things the same and where equity tries to make things fair so Islam prescribes equity acknowledging that that men and women are equal we're not in the same in our biology and our nature we're just not the same type of human so there can't be equality and you know we hear things about like transgender issues and bathrooms and all that that's all about equality and and standing up against that when it rubs feminists the wrong way that's that's the bad feminism where you try to acknowledge or we're in this type of feminism you reject the nature of man the nature of the male I should say and try to make the nature of men and women the same because you attributed to well men and women would be the same if it wasn't for the society that changes us yeah so I believe that that's a bad feminism with his lead to this like shaming of men for being men and but the good feminism is that women should be have equal rights and all of these things that are that that belong to them that's rightfully theirs but they didn't have when you look back I'm at a time when women were just like sold as as as property and didn't have couldn't even home property and couldn't do any of the things you know it's long gave those vices yeah I mean there's a story of a LR it benefit that Allah be pleased with him who was the the second caliph after Abu Bakr and after the prophets passing and in in the story goes that he was giving a khutba in a woman stood up and corrected him on an ax and an error that he made in public and he basically said you're right thank you yeah you know this is unheard of in metal metal metal medieval Europe or many other societies around the world that a woman can confront the leader of the nation in public correct him and and he was humble and accepted so that you know this year you're absolutely right these are well established in Islam many years ago those are one of the challenges we're dealing with today ignorant people who some just choose to stay ignorant they don't come and research and look into it because just the fact that more women are coming to Islam din men right is a fact in and of itself that these women have done the research no one's forcing them to come to Islam they are doing out of their own free will and that negates totally this absurd you know fallacy that Islam somehow oppresses the woman actually liberate sir we're almost we're almost out of time so we talked touched upon why you came to Islam and then now you're really in this realm of relationship kind of like a relationship guru would you say someone who's like I like to think of it as a relationship coaching coaching Tom right what's your vision with this before we end what what is you and then maybe in the future in common we can we can elaborate more so my vision is to take this framework and these principles and eventually create a frontline what I like to call a frontline of relationship coaches who can understand and respond to the issues the crises that we have in marriages to become educated consumers of therapy and counseling there just aren't enough counselors there aren't enough scholars who are who have degrees and have gone to school and I've studied this for their lives there aren't enough of them to respond to all of the people having crisis in marriage I was one of them so what I hope to create is a framework that allows more people to to benefit from this information so that they don't have to necessarily find you know a counselor or when they do go to counseling they're much more savvy they're much more educated and efficient consumers of that help so think of it as like an army of assistance to these you know counselors who are overwhelmed with people that have crises and also you know coaches who can respond to it without because you know a lot of people can't afford going to counseling so it also has to do with you know the financial the financial challenges of seeking this kind of help a lot of insurance policies won't cover this kind of thing people are you know it might go away now with what's happening today with the Trump administration in health care so couple more points in your in your studies in your pursuit of knowledge in this area the countless hundreds of articles and videos and relationship experts that you've listened to have you and I've also gone down this route I've always been able to somehow maybe someone didn't elaborate or articulate the Islamic message maybe you saw some some Imam or someone who didn't the same way as let's say another person who is not Muslim but and many of these valuable points did you see that there's there's you can find some hadith or I somehow you can connect it back did you see the psychology how its long tack absolutely absolutely so for example while there are so many examples give us one before we leave sure I'll give you one I'll give you one that goes to the core of what we talked about yeah about the internal values right there's an eye on the Quran it says Allah will not help someone unless they help themselves Yeah right there's also many times that he says in the Quran o you who have wronged your own Souls there's another example or there are many examples where actually here's a very good one anywhere anytime you read in the Quran that Allah describes those who are successful it is every without without fail it is associated with internal values those who are chaste those who are remember Allah often those who are patient those who are perseverant those who are charitable who treat the orphans well it's always associated with some type of internal value these are the ones who are successful even what are the ones who will you know reach Jenna however it is it is worded but whenever he talks about anything that's external it's always associated with you know doom the most famous example is in surah tauba when he talks about if your houses if your spouse is if your children if your business is for which you fear a decline in revenues if these things are more important to you than Allah and His Messenger then know that there's a day that will come that he will judge you and Allah does not love the transgressors and so on and so forth so whenever you see external factors they're always associated with you know warnings and consequent and whenever you see internal factors is always associated with with success and this goes back to and really what it is is it's it comes back to the concept of self-esteem which is a very misunderstood concept and we could have just a whole session just on that one but it comes to the core of it and I can go on and on and on about other examples well it was a pleasure talking with you meeting you and inshallah we can we continue our conversation and so I was it was good it was a pleasure thank you so much for being with us thank you yeah do you have have you have do you have a website or I do not have anything yet what I would I would I hope to do actually is to test this concept by means of some type of men's support group a sort of Brotherhood sort of gathering that I can introduce these concepts for anyone who's interested yes and if it works if it's something that that they find beneficial then I would like to you know move forward to finish the book and formally create a framework and a website and all that so right now I feel like I'm I'm more in a pilot test mode all right thank you thank you thank you guys for tuning in as he said look the crater of the heavens in her thoughts about saying that Allah not almighty will not change the condition of a people until they change within themselves you have to take those necessary steps towards the Creator towards God towards Allah make a conscious effort to make a change and then put your trust in the Almighty and He will facilitate a way of ease what if you're not even calling upon your Creator like we talked about earlier I mean like Ricardo did he called upon God and asked for guidance we needed every single day in our lives what if you'd even I was talking to one gentleman he said look I'm here if God wants me he can come he knows where I'm at I mean what kind of what kind of rebellious nature is this you have to humble yourself you have to earnestly beseech his help and you have to want to know why you've been created why you're hearing where you're going when you're done so why don't you do a Ricardo did I mean look at that very simple ask the creator for guidance and if you're on that guidance value it and earnestly pray that you don't lose it and continue to develop a relationship with your Creator if you're tuning in for the first time call us [Music]

Channel: Digital Mimbar

Views: 64,305

Rating: 4.9097114 out of 5

Keywords: islam, muslim, muslims, islamic, quran, koran, allah, muhammad, mohammed, mohamed, prophet, hadith, sunnah, shaykh, imam, lecture, khutbah, khutba, ramadan, bilal philips, sufi, salafi, hanafi, hijab, nasheed, nashid, almaghrib, dars, halaqa, bayan, convert, revert, shahada, dawah, da'wah, maher zain, sami yusuf, atheism, science, atheist, qur'an, recitation, surah, afasy, religion, religious, deen, madhhab, shia, sunni, Devout Christian, Reading the Quran

Id: Ueh4UcN7u1g

Length: 48min 24sec (2904 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 07 2017

Reddit Comments

[u/scavbh]

OP thanks for posting this. Converts have such s beautiful Perspective and this gentlemen is no exception.

Take the time and listen to his views. Powerful !