Christmas Miracle - SNL

>>> I'M DR. BETHEL FROM YALE. THIS IS CARDINAL HANSON. AS YOU CAN IMAGINE, YOU ARE OF GREAT INTEREST TO BOTH THE SECULAR AND RELIGIOUS COMMUNITIES. >> WE BELIEVE YOU HAVE HAD A GENUINE ENCOUNTER WITH THE REAL SANTA CLAUS. >> THIS IS NUTS, MAN. I MEAN, WE'RE JUST REGULAR PEOPLE WHO HEARD FOOT STEPS ON CHRISTMAS EVE AND NOW WE'RE A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. >> INDEED. TELL US WHAT HAPPENED AFTER YOU AWOKE. >> ME AND MY GIRL WOKE UP AND SANTA CLAUS WAS STANDING IN THE LIVING ROOM, REAL AS RAIN. >> HE SAID, COME WITH ME TO THE NORTH POLE. JUST LIKE THAT WE WERE ON HIS SLEIGH WITH THE REINDEER AND EVERYTHING. >> MIRACULOUS. >> AND YOU, MS. RAFFERTY? >> WELL, A LITTLE DIFFERENT FOR ME. I'M CRASHING IN THEIR GUEST ROOM. I CAME DOWN STAIRS LATER. I WAS MET BY A NINE FOOT TALL GOAT MAN NAMED CRINKLE MOUSE. HE POINTS A HOOF AT ME AND GOES LIKE THIS. [ GRUNTING ] I GET THE HINT THAT I SHOULD COME WITH. >> YOU WERE TAKEN TO SANTA'S SLEIGH? >> NO. NO, NO, NO. CRINKLE MOUSE TRAVELS BY DOG SLED. WHICH SOUNDS FUN BUT THEN HE STRAPS A HARNESS ON ME, THROWS ME IN WITH THE FREAKING DOG TEAM. THESE DOGS DON'T FLY, THEY RUN. IF YOU THINK YOU CAN'T RUN AS FAST AS A DOG, YOU'RE RIGHT. A MINUTE IN I FALL, GET DRAGGED FOR A MILE OVER A FOREST FLOOR AND MY SWEATS GET YANKED OFF. NOW THERE IS NOTHING BETWEEN THE GROUND AND MY COOTER AND TOOTER. WASN'T THE WORST TIME I HAVE HAD ON ALL FOURS. >> FASCINATING. WHAT HAPPENED WHEN YOU ARRIVED AT THE NORTH POLE? >> WELL, IT SOUNDS CRAZY. WE WERE TAKEN TO SANTA'S WORKSHOP. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL. IT SMELLED LIKE GINGERBREAD. MY BEARD STILL SMELLS LIKE IT, MA'AM. >> YEAH. MRS. CLAUS CAME OUT WITH MUGS OF HOT COCOA. WARMED MY TUMMY AND MY HEART. >> WHAT? THESE TWO WERE IN A DISNEY MOVIE. MEANWHILE, CRINKLE MOUSE TAKES ME TO THE REINDEER STABLES. HE HANDS ME A SHOVEL. HE GOES, YOU WORK. ALSO I HAD THE PLEASURE OF MEETING THE MISSUS, MRS. CRINKLE MOUSE WHO LOOKS MORE LIKE A RAM THAN A GOAT. SHE'S EITHER JEALOUS OR A LEZ BECAUSE SHE STARTS RAMMING MY KNOCKER LIKE -- PARDON ME, SHARON. SHE'S GOING -- >> THAT'S ENOUGH. THEY GET IT. THEY GET IT. >> AND WHAT HAPPENED NEXT IN THE WORKSHOP? >> WELL, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BELIEVE ME, BUT THE ELVES CAME OUT. WE ALL SANG SONGS. >> THERE WERE A BUNCH OF CHUBBY GUYS IN FUN HATS WITH CUTE TOES AND NOSES. >> THE STABLES HAVE ONE ELF. HE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE GOLLUM. SMELLED LIKE A HARD-BOILED EGG AND THIS LITTLE BASTARD'S NAME WAS SHART. >> OKAY. DID HE ALSO SING AND DANCE? >> NO, NO. HE'S IN CHARGE OF THE REINDEER, RIGHT? HE TELLS ME IT'S TIME TO CHECK THEM FOR WORMS. CUT TO I'M HOLDING ONTO A LADY REINDEER KEEPING HER STEADY WHILE SHART IS POKING AROUND. THESE REINDEER CAN FLY SO WHEN SHE BUCKS I'M 20, 30 FEET OFF THE GROUND AND STILL ROCKING ZERO PANTS HERE. SO MY HOG TAKER AND LOG MAKER ARE ON FULL DISPLAY. LET'S JUST SAY I UNDERSTAND WHY CRINKLE MOUSE AND COMPANY AREN'T SHOWING UP ON ANY COCA-COLA CHRISTMAS CANS. >> GOD, I DON'T THINK YOU HAD AS GOOD A TIME AS WE DID. >> OH, YEAH, DOUG? YEAH? >> HOW WERE YOU RETURNED HOME? >> WELL, SANTA SPRINKLED MAGIC DUST AND THE WHOLE WORKSHOP DISSOLVED AROUND US. >> THEN WE WERE BACK IN OUR LIVING ROOM, CHRISTMAS MORNING. WE WENT RIGHT OUT AND LOADED UP THE FLAT BED WITH CHRISTMAS HAM FOR THE POOR, CAME HOME THAT NIGHT AND MADE TENDER LOVE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN SIX YEARS. >> THE LORD WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS. >> YEAH, SO DOES SHART. BECAUSE WHEN IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO GO CRINKLE MOUSE HANDS HIM A MAGIC STICK AND THIS SON OF A BITCH STEPS UP TO THE PLATE AND CRACKS ME IN THE BACK OF THE KNEE WITH IT. I DISSOLVE INTO A CLOSED BANK OF AMERICA 15 MILES FROM MY HOUSE. AND I TRIPPED SOME SORT OF ALARM SO THE COPS SHOW UP AND MIND YOU, I AM STILL PANTSLESS. NOW I'M SPENDING CHRISTMAS MORNING IN THE BACK OF A SQUAD CAR WITH MY GRASSY KNOLL AND MY GASSY HOLE HANGING OUT. I'M THINKING, DAMN IT, COLLEEN, YOU'RE BECOMING YOUR MOTHER. >> REMARKABLE. DO YOU THINK YOU WILL EVER SEE THESE SPIRITS AGAIN? >> NO. BUT I FEEL ST. NICK IN MY HEART. >> YEAH, I SEE HIM WHENEVER I SEE A CHILD SMILE. >> YEAH, I SMELL HARD-BOILED EGGS, SO SHART CAN'T BE TOO FAR OFF. I THINK THAT LITTLE BASTARD FOLLOWED ME HOME. OH, BOY. WHAT THE HELL AM I GOING TO FEED THAT THING? [ APPLAUSE ] ♪♪♪

Channel: Saturday Night Live

Views: 9,720,090

Rating: 4.9048266 out of 5

Keywords: SNL, Saturday Night Live, Season 42, Episode 1714, Casey Affleck, Christmas, Santa Claus, Bobby Moynihan, Aidy Bryant, Kate McKinnon, Cecily Strong, Ms Rafferty, live, new york, comedy, sketch, funny, hilarious, late night, host, music, guest, laugh, impersonation, episode 10, casey affleck, ben affleck, good will hunting, manchester by the sea, the finest hours, triple 9, chance the rapper, Chancelor Johnathan Bennett, social experiment, coloring book, no problem

Id: lo8ZgNws504

Length: 5min 52sec (352 seconds)

Published: Sun Dec 18 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/dont_worry_im_here]

Damn, I've only seen the two with Gosling. Just went and searched... I never knew they did six of these!

Watching them all now...

[u/confused_coyote]

My cooter and my tooter

[u/rednax2009]

One of their best series.

[u/HarvestMoonMaria]

My favourite recurring sketch. Kate is a treasure

[u/KennyFulgencio]

how do bobby's eyes always twinkle? is this a skill I can learn?

[u/mag_noIia]

I love these sketches

[u/gargravarrrr]

I love all of these, but as usual the first one was the best by far.

[u/pumpkin2500]

this is my dads favorite sketch series

[u/mynameisborromir]

Who played Shart? Good lord I’ve scoured the web. I’ve gone from Colin to Alex to Mikey to a theoretical uncredited extra then back to Colin then to back to Mikey to compare noses and then briefly to Shep Rose and then back to Colin with 60% confidence it was Colin based on the expression... but it’s a hell of a getup. Who was Shart????