Hi It's me I'm not dead! Which is an awful surprise considering how many people wrote my obituary yesterday preemptively in case I did die. But I didn't, so suck on that! I'm an old man That's not what I meant to say I meant to say I'm a mature adult! But somehow old man came out. But I am a mature adult, that has been sanctioned nope.. thats the wrong word! I am a mature adult that has been given the responsibility of this human form in front of you! I couldn't have said this any weirder. Believe it or not, I actually do know how to take care of myself. 'Cept for that one time where I styled my hair with butter And I jumped off the monkey bars and broke my arm And I jumped off the stairs and then I broke my head open I almost died then.. But honestly thank you guys so much for all the love and outpouring from the community that I've seen thus far Even though at sometimes It did seem like screaming and cursing, I knew there was love deep down in those messages of hate But honestly I'm not 100% better yet So I'm gonna go to a game that you guys requested again because there's this sandbox mode in Totally Accurate Battle Simulator that allows you to hypothetically make any battle of your dreams. So I'm gonna do just that And I'm gonna go through a whole bunch 'a *yawns* *keeps yawning* I'm an amazingly professional youtuber with 14 million subscribers that I definitely deseeeerve! oh I'm not lying again. I am good. I am great. So anyways, sandbox Go to town you assholes who is the better why can I not move foward that's good.. FIGHT!! Well that was over quickly Is it woo, it is two is are 2 better than ooooone? Come get some! Well shit, god damn! boink boink aand...eat a dick *high pitched ohh sound* I think *ughh* I think that might have been a little convoluted Ohhh they're gonna get you this time They're not gonna gang up on y'all at once they're gonna line up so you can beat the schnot out of 'em oo Ooh! So we've determined that three peasants is better than one boxer Oh no you guys are gonna get poked I bet you're gonna di.. well that's one down tw- *weird oop sounds continued* *sexy music* The range does nothing when they hump you from either side Oh no get 'em huh huhhh Well ow! Man those tooth picks are gonna do some damage some day Well shit! Oh, they're gonna hug it out. They're a peaceful bunch. Well. Mmmmm, I dunno. Okay, so we got 120 peasants, vs. 1 Rocky Balboa. Let's see what happens. Oh, god. Well, my computer can handle it, for some reason. I don't know how. I think you're gonna-- oh shit. You didn't even get to one! That, that boxer, also now has Apollo Cree next to him. So it's Rocky and Apollo Creed vs. everyone that didn't like the- -didn't like Rocky 5 *sounds of death* *more death* *Mark make it stop that's to much death sounds* Dang, they clobbered him! I feel like one chariot would do pretty good. I'm gonna have him coming from way downtown. I think one chariot's gonna have a good time with this bunch. Go get him. Go get him, Sally Sack. Well, you missed some... okay... alright... Ooooh He whaaat? Alright, we're gonna blast 'em with ballistae From downtown. Well they'll fire eventually, don't worry, they're not actually gonna hurt 'em....they're ju- whoa. Ehh. Those guys in front sure caught a mouthful. Holy shit. Are you okay? Nice hair. I think 100 peasants are unstoppable. Oh jeez. What are you doing? Where's your eyes? Just a soulless monster-- wow. Okay. What are you doing? Is he, is he dead? Is he dead? Is he, is he dead?I can't I can't quite tell. Oh my god. Oh my god, oh my god. *laughing* Oh no! They're just humping that dead one! Oh my god! Oh good lord! This is inappropriate! That is, that is straight-up humping. That is 100% hump. They-they-they're dying of exhaustion from the orgy. My god, leave that poor guy alone. Stop bapping his head back and forth, he's dead! *mockingly* I don't think this video is gonna get monetized. You like this dramatic music playing as we watch this guy bap his dick around back and forth oh-so-sensually? Ope, oh, he dead now. Ohh, no. Last man standing. You're doing it man, you're doing a great job. You you bap whatever that is, I dunno. Ah whatever. Okay, so that didn't work at all. We got a lot of hwachas and I believe that's of the right length. To kill all them Hwatcha it Hwoahtcha *ooooo noises* *more oooos* *still more oooos* *even more oos* Almost but not quite. We got some ba-wow Wha W-wha What? I didn't even loo- there weren't guys on that before there were not tha- that's not Whaaaaaaaaat in the world are you doing? *return of the ooos* *aaaaaaah* Why are you oh why are you shaking? Why were you shaking? I don't know why you were shaking *weird mark noises* I'm rocky This my rocky impression UH OH Well shit Get some Hwacha it up Ugh Our crotch-rockets are better than your crotch-rockets Man, it's so good that we have qualified flexible people for this endeavour Wow! You guys didn't do shit Stop twerking Oh this guy, this guy's going the distance on the twerk here The other guys are falling to pieces all around him But he's gonna twerk a nightmare outta here Oh jeez What're you- wow I uh- I got some questions about this right here Wh- why- why is this a thing Wh- Why Why do you guys need- why Why I know that was intense, but why This is a strategic- this is uh- Uh Napoleon's method for uh- doing something Don't worry, don't ask I- I knew- woah. what- Uh-wha-uh Hang on Imma take a look in there Cause something don't seem right Things keep flying out at high speed But apparently this is ok wow Alright there buddy Hello horsies Nice butt in there Hoo-boy Although I don't know who's winning Oh jeez Why is- Why is that guy- Why- Why Are- Sir? Sir if you're trying to pretend to be dead You're not doing a very good job at it Ok my computer can- Why are you over here sir? You're not doing your job sir See everyone else doing their job? About to fire their cannons? dat didn't do anything don't come any closer Don't come any closer! Oh god You might be in trouble Well shit you got some a- -no you turned your backs- they're still coming for you I see the beady eyes on them Ooh, that guy got clobbered Oh no god no Oh jeez I thought that guy was gonna get blasted You're getting blasted You're getting blasted! Oh, shit You almost had 'em Spank that rump! Well, looks like blue won Wabooski! ooh Now this is a b-woah Good god! Holy shit! Oh Oh my god, good go- I don't know what's happening there I don't know what anything is going on here Are we still fighting? Are there still people alive? and holy shit I forgot the catapults fire so fast~ We're going farmer v.- If you hold it with the pointy end forward you might have a little more success there buddy Uh oh Someone's gonna get stabbed up the butt Her-der-n-der-n ooh Well that don't look good Huh. It seems... Woah It seems to me that the bodies are actually getting pinned in to each other But the farmers seem to have an edge on it! So spearmen are useless! Why would anybody have spearmen they don't make any god damn sense *off to the side* Chica what you doing over there Alright go for it You can't penetrate these defence- ow. Oh shit Eugh Eugh, they penetrated so hard I forgot that shieldmen actually can't attack so I was hoping the stupidity of the other team would bleed through their strategy and they'd just end up killing themselves uh oh. We got a few stragglers left My god. I can't believe that worked. Alright so that's about all the options that I could possibly explore in this game I really don't know what else I can do until the full game is released But either way thank you guys again for all the love, and outpouring from the community that has wished me, better health than what I've got! And I am feeling better, and it will be, back onto normal schedule, very soon. So thank you everybody so much for watching And as always, I will see you, In the next video. Buh-Bye! *Crazy La Paint by MiniMusicMan*
