Celebrities Being Dirty-Minded For 9 Minutes Straight

i've burst into her bathroom with a baby gun while she was trying to pee in her phone she's like huddled on the floor in her bathroom naked and me nick and michael step on me and i'm naked i'm weird unloading [Music] i want to like blow my wife away with like a romantic night out what do i do you said it what oh here what [Applause] i've been to scotland i went to isle of skye oh that's very close yeah oh my gosh it's like it's so beautiful there yes it is yeah yeah i ca every time i think about it that's true and we were i know oh my gosh well i was there during summer too so it goes on all night i like it when my man gives me a big kiss shack i can't say the answer i want to say so i'ma say gift [Applause] what is something that you love that everyone else doesn't penis facials [Applause] i mean i know how seriously comic book nerds take this kind of stuff because i am one of them really what do you think about my breasts a what i don't know i'll tell you what it sounds weird i don't know hold on let me figure it out yeah i had my period where i you know put my hand there's a scene uh where you uh pleasure yourself uh how do you approach that kind of scene that's got to be a strange thing to shoot on camera how do i approach it mentally or just did you get to do any of the fun stuff and said did you get the fire guns of that size or smaller did you get to do that i fired that weapon and was there a big recoil when you when you yeah but that's what i loved it i loved feeling that vibration and three things you must do every day oh man i have to make coffee before the breakfast is done in the microwave that's game number one work out and i have to look at naked people so like a fragment portion of it is in my tongue so it kind of changed the way i speak a little bit it's still in your tongue can you see it yeah it's great for oral sex because i grew up in albuquerque what was there any cool places anything that you liked being there like how'd you like it oh did you have fun there yeah i'd go and visit your mother once in a while [Applause] name a part of the body you're always banging into things you said your butt would you want big boobs or small boobs i think medium boost medium boost i'd want a good handful of boobs are your uh your hand showing how far out your boobs would come now just a good like just cupping nicely besides your face what body part do you look at the most in the mirror [Applause] i don't want to look at it but the thing all right now josh let me get the off gear what are you afraid of well i was gonna go with flying but i think i'll go with um girls over 12. besides making love showering or swimming what is something else you've enjoyed doing naked watch tv you watch tv naked yeah really that weird it definitely affects my personal life sure you know my personal life is pretty much non-existent which is not good not for the long run not for me not for her it's not it's not fun kind of food squirty yeah you know like cream and berries and such berries who squirts berries trained athletes oh right oh really do they oh oh my god no no they don't go no no like cream cream creams okay but it's valentine's day so you can squirt whatever you want no you can't [Laughter] why do i say this we hung out all night because i think most girls meet justin and be like ah and be a bit pathetic but like i meet him and just was like hey what's up i was quite nervous well no no that was just because i was holding his balls the reward for me is all in the work and the reward for me is all in just it being something that moves you that's what's most important to me what are you looking at i specifically you've either had plastic surgery or a makeover because you look really hot today no you're so annoying you're so obnoxious you wonder why everybody hates you i specifically covered up so you couldn't look at me and undress me with your molester eyes ellen name three things you say to a cute baby aren't you adorable gucci gucci gu are you wet really often i often i dream about the end of the world that's a sex dream so what about when i dream about sex that's a sex dream okay so what about uh sex stream yeah of course if a man zipper breaks the church what might he use to cover it up a child whoa a what a child locked up name three things that get you in trouble with your spouse the internet [Applause] i don't even know what i'm going to say before i say it it just flies out of my mouth is that how does that work what happens when you find yourself in a situation where sincerity is paramount what the way you're looking at me makes me want to cover up my vagina [Applause] madam if i had rubber gloves i'd do it for you you have a chest and i have what they call pecs you don't put your hand on that okay put your hand on that what are you feeling i feel abreast the way that i met simon was they asked me to be a guest judge focus conan to be um we've been discussing christmas presents to get for our parents right it's true and he said that he wanted to get his mum as many cats as he you like could right so when he won i said think how many cats you can get what is your favorite body part on a man arms that can pick me up all right what is penis that wasn't me that said that that was a parasite inside me that said lovely where's the rest of your outfit i was hoping you have it what's up you look nice that was not as nice as you look at that this is just for you but then they told me you were guessing i i assure you this is an area in which i'm confident i am not bluffing i i will take care of you i will make you see multicolored i'll make you forget your own name have a nice valentine's day first valentine's day married um yeah i i kind of dropped the ball craig [Music] i don't think anyone would mind just pick it up keep going

Channel: LaughPlanet

Views: 1,732,131

Rating: 4.9468603 out of 5

Keywords: celebrities, celebrities dirty jokes, celebrities funny moments, comebacks, burns, clapbacks, best of celebrity, family feud, celebrity, celebrities hilarious moments, rihana, jennifer lawrence, shaq, craig ferguson, kim kardashian, elln, aubrey plaza, conan, laugh planet, laughplanet

Id: MKfkJXpDWV0

Length: 9min 26sec (566 seconds)

Published: Thu Jul 22 2021