Bill Burr First Lady

ya know it's a very uh I don't know times are changing I guess I don't know yeah Michelle Obama's doing an arena tour that's another thing going on I'm gonna say that again Michelle Obama is doing an arena tour she's not playing comedy clubs she's doing arenas when did first ladies start acting like they got elected you know they'll be the first lady that's not a [ __ ] job just standing there smiling and waving right look how quiet is it in here why is it so [ __ ] quiet you think that's the job it's not a [ __ ] job dude if you really think it's a job just look at her right look at Obama when that guy got elected he looked like he was about 41 years old when he left office that guy looked like he was about 73 right look at Michelle she looks younger now than she did when that dude got elected what has she done for the last eight years yeah other than lay in a giant vat of illuminati level lotion just set this floating a couple hours a shapeshifter comes in and dumps another bucket on pops her head up hey bamm-bamm tell Stevie Wonder to come down and play some songs tonight no wrong now I found out she's doing a tour cuz she's doing a book tour yes she wrote a book shoot a book about not having a job I gotta read that [ __ ] book chapter one how to know if a dick tastes presidential [Applause] I don't weed your way through all that local representative [ __ ] and get to the big swing and dick in the room I'll tell you right now say what you want about Republican presidents but they got their first ladies in line they do do george w was president for eight years eight years i don't even know his wife's name it was an abigail of some [ __ ] Maggie no clue Donald Trump's wife stands behind him like a giant meerkat like Bill Clinton was president his wife never shut up he [ __ ] around on her so much he was like alright whatever just do it but I'm telling you right now I'm gonna I'm gonna check out that [ __ ] tour I got to see what that's all about who opens who opens on that [ __ ] tour was it Oprah Winfrey's husband yeah who's he [ __ ] come out and talk about what it's like to walk her dogs do it for 20 minutes today the cocker spaniel is probably the most fussiest and they're gonna bring him around look I'm sure that there's some feminists in the crowd right now I'm not appreciating this joke feeling triggered feeling like they need to [ __ ] put out a hashtag or some [ __ ] and be brave and speak out you know what you're full of [ __ ] you are all those feminists are full of [ __ ] because I'm gonna tell you right now someday someday there's gonna beat there's gonna be the first woman president alright which means which mean you don't gonna wonder you don't get what a [ __ ] platform is and you automatically cheer it's good to save genitalia [ __ ] tell you they're not smart people feminists and that as smart as they're coming off telling you someday there's gonna be by the way it's gonna be my last show ever by the time this [ __ ] thing comes out someday there's gonna be the first female president which means there's gonna be the first male first lady alright then you wait you [ __ ] wait the first time that dude opens his mouth about some political [ __ ] you watch all these feminists they're only you shut the [ __ ] up it is her time now it is her time she was elected not you don't pick out some plates [ __ ] you are the first lady he's gonna get treated like Tom Arnold when he was with Roseanne Secret Service name will be like appendix or doesn't matter not worthy of protecting just entered the Oval Office not worthy of protecting

Channel: Clip Master

Views: 376,456

Keywords: bill burr, bill burr paper tiger, michelle obama, bill burr michelle obama, paper tiger, bill burr netflix, bill burr netflix 2019, netflix, bill burr 2020

Id: YYxJUGjmuxE

Length: 5min 43sec (343 seconds)

Published: Mon Mar 02 2020