Best of r/AITA 2023 - Reddit Stories

Welcome Friends to another r slash am I the  jerkier video today we've got a lot of awesome   stories and our first ones from Night Owl 63 am I  the jerk for holding my son's college fun hostage   I 48 year old male have a son that graduated  this year from high school we my wife and I   started his college fund the minute we found out  she was pregnant since we made good money in the   mid six figures his college fund currently has  almost 400 000 in it we've never told our son   what to do with his life we may have guided his  decisions as any good parent should but since   he was young we let him make his own decisions we  also never expected academic Excellence or forced   him into sports or artistic activities now that he  graduated high school he said that he didn't want   to go to college we said as long as he was sure  he could do whatever he wanted he refused trade   schools too he also did not want to work with  us on our business he said that he planned to   use his college fund to start a business of his  own I said that I allow it only if he takes some   business management accounting and law classes  in the nearby community college I said that I   would pay for them out of pocket and not from the  fund and then I would expect a well-made business   plan before I would give him the money my wife  agrees a hundred percent but he called us jerks   for holding his college fund Hostage to make  him do what we want we think we're just doing   our best to make sure that his business succeeds  so am I the jerk I think op is not the jerk here   mainly because they're trying to make sure that  this wealth of money isn't just totally burnt I   think it goes without saying how many businesses  start and then crash into the ground despite a   sizeable investment and as much as you want to  support your kids you don't want to just blindly   give them four hundred thousand dollars with  no tangible experience in operating a business   what do you guys think is withholding all this  money until they take multiple classes a jerk   move should Opie just give the money over or would  you say op is not the jerk and this is clearly the   right thing to do let me know what you guys think  down in the comments our next story is from Key   quail7921 am I the jerk for shortening my workout  after a man got on the elliptical next to me I 27   year old female like to go to the gym later in  the evenings so I can have the place mostly to   myself since I don't like how claustrophobic it  feels when tons of people are there at the same   time I live around the block from a chain gym and  go there most nights to use the elliptical for a   while when I got to the gym tonight the entire  row of ellipticals was empty so I grabbed the   one all the way on the end everything was fine  during my workout all the way up to the last few   minutes a guy walked into the mostly deserted  gym and got under the elliptical right next to   mine which I thought was weird since there was a  row of about 12 other ones that were all empty it   made me a little bit uncomfortable so I shortened  my workout by a few minutes and hopped off to grab   a disinfectant wipe when I got back to wipe down  on the machine the guy stopped pedaling and asked   me what my problem was I was caught off guard and  just stammered something about how I was done with   my workout which was basically true anyway but  he said something about me treating him like a   predator for no reason and then put his headphones  back in am I the jerk for shortening my workout   because some guy chose the elliptical right next  to mine I think op is definitely not the jerk and   this is very similar to a lot of what guys know  as urinal etiquette if you walk into a bathroom   and there's four urinals in there and somebody's  on the first one you're almost obligated to go to   the fourth one if you walk into a bathroom with  four urinals and somebody's using the first one   you are weird as heck for choosing the second one  I would say this extends to the gym if you walk in   and there's four ellipticals and somebody's on the  first one your weirdest act for choosing to get on   the second one give people some space our next  story is from different kind 565 am I the jerk   for taking back the money AI contributed towards  my stepson's Camp after he took my daughter's   sticker collections context my daughter 12  is disabled has been since she was five her   activities and interests are very limited except  for her love for stickers she loves collecting   stickers and spends most of her time doing it if  there's one thing she enjoys doing this is it it   also helps her get rid of Stress and Anxiety I've  been saving for my stepson 16's summer camp and   so far have contributed 80 percent while his dad  contributed 20 percent it's a huge deal for him   and last week he was begging my daughter to give  him her camera and she refused he begged and she   kept refusing he then turned to me and his dad and  his dad asked me to do something but I told him if   it's a no then he should just take it obviously  this upset my stepson later I found out that he   punished my daughter by throwing away all of her  sticker collections he admitted that he and two   of his friends dump them in car oil and then burn  them I was in disbelief but very angry I scolded   him banned his friends from the house and then  pulled back the eighty percent of money I paid   towards his Camp he started crying and begging  and apologizing and then called my husband my   husband told me that pulling the money was an  overreaction and a step too far he said I was   trying to hurt his son rather than just let him  learn from this experience I don't know what this   was supposed to mean he offered that I punish  him by taking his electronics for three days   but I said no because he caused significant damage  and caused my daughter losing valuable childhood   collections of stickers some even were hard to get  like Marvels for instance my husband disagreed and   said that I promised and can't pull back now cause  it'll make my stepson resent me for good he kept   saying don't make that mistake and guilting me  about my decision I might be going too far but   my daughter is devastated and still crying over  her Collections and refusing to talk to anyone   I think Opie's definitely not the jerk and no  offense to the 16 year old kid but to me they   sound particularly evil I don't know how you can  go and take some 12 year old Sticker Collection   douse it in car oil and set it on fire like how  messed up are you it's actually disturbing how   little their dad wants to punish them A kid had  a prized collection they went and doused it in   an oil and set it on fire and the dad thinks  they deserve just a slap on the wrist for it   they're not gonna learn from that lesson not at  16. this next story is from throwaway 477-212-498   am I the jerk for calling my girlfriend a spoiled  child after she said she felt like a neanderthal   showering with a bucket my girlfriend and I are  currently in vacation in Croatia we booked a small   Villa from Airbnb in which we've been staying in  this last week three days ago the water heater   stopped working so we called the owner a few hours  later he brought a plumber with him and after some   investigation he told us that the issue will take  a week or more to solve because the plumber told   them that the heater was old and needed replacing  so he needs to shop for a new one and that it   needs to be installed in a new location he told us  he was going to refund the amount that we paid for   that day plus the remaining Days of our booking  and if we wanted to stay despite the lack of hot   water he was going to give us a much cheaper  rate 40 off we were having a great time and   enjoying our stay because the Villa was nice and  the view of the beach was incredible and looked   times better than the heavily edited pictures  you see on the internet not to mention it was   a good deal especially with the newer rates so we  decided to stay after I told my girlfriend that we   could just shower using a bucket something to note  my girlfriend has never showered that way she's   American but still I assume that many people from  the US would have at least heard about it despite   never trying it growing up I exclusively shot hour  that way at home until we could afford a heater in   its monthly costs the only showers I took at home  before were with cold water she was surprised to   hear it and thought I was joking at first the  following day I gave her some tips and after   she was done I asked her how it went she said it  was more of a chore than a shower last evening   she went to take a shower again before getting  ready to leave for dinner after she was done she   started complaining Non-Stop about showering with  a bucket saying it was very primitive and couldn't   believe that some people really did it that way  because she felt like a neanderthal the whole   time I didn't like her comment because it was  disrespectful she apologized saying her comment   wasn't directed towards me but more towards the  people that still shower this way I told her that   that clarification makes her comment a hundred  times worse because it was insulting to a lot   of people she replied that she didn't know what I  wanted her to say because she'd already apologized   to me and asked if I was just looking to argue  for no reason I told you the last thing I want   to do is argue with a spoiled child and went  downstairs I waited for her downstairs while   she got ready when she came down she informed  me that she'll be going to the restaurant alone   because she didn't want to embarrass me in case  she started acting like a spoiled child I tried   apologizing for my comment but she just ignored  me and left it's 3 30 now and she just came back   half an hour ago I tried talking to her again  but she told me she was tired and just wanted   to sleep I think there's kind of a couple ways  that you could take this you could take it as   op's not the jerk and the girlfriend was clearly  privileged and acting just out of pocket you could   also say that everyone sucks here and that while  the girlfriend might be privileged what she was   saying wasn't like a personal attack but Opie felt  like they needed to take it that way kind of going   back at her and making this a personal back and  forth spout the bottom line the end result kind   of sucks either way considering there was a bit of  a back and forth this Villa should be paradise and   they're both angry at each other our next story is  from desegy am I the jerk for refusing my future   sister-in-law's request to dye my hair for my  brother's wedding my future sister-in-law Liz   has turned into a bridezilla and is going to war  with everyone over every stupid thing my natural   color is red I love my hair Liz is a blonde  but she loves to have red hair and in fact ever   since meeting me she's been dying her hair almost  exactly my color I don't mind I think it's weird   that she does it but I don't have a monopoly over  this particular shade of red and she's free to do   with her hair whatever she wants well she asked me  this week that I should dye my hair to a different   color because she wants her hair to be unique in  her wedding she offered to cover all the costs as   well I just said no because it's my hair I don't  want it changed I told my brother and he told me   to do whatever I want because it's my hair he said  he'll talk to Liz to get her to back off well it   didn't work because Liz has come to my parents and  they've taken her side they say it's her special   day and we need to be more accommodating and it's  important for our future relationship that we get   along I believe I am accommodating she can do  whatever she wants with her own hair how is   my hair any of her business anyway my parents  tell me that I should be the bigger person I   don't know why an 18 year old should be the bigger  person compared to the 27 year old Liz they told   me I'm making this minor issue into a big problem  and I should just do what she wants because it's   her wedding am I the jerk for not giving in I  think Ops definitely not the jerk here I think   baby maybe they could have a reason if Opie has  like a really contrast sharp fake hair color I'm   saying let's say Opie has like neon green and pink  splotched hair maybe they could argue something   even then I think they would be a total jerk  for expecting you to change your hair color at   the wedding now the fact that it's op's natural  hair color that they're asking them to change I   think that is absolutely ridiculous I think it's  unreal if you expect anybody to dye their hair   away from their natural color our next story is  from adequeezy3077 am I the jerk for calling my   best friend dumb for marrying for love I 27 year  old female am in a very stable relationship with   my fiance 29 year old female for around four years  and we're planning to get engaged eventually and   then marry my best friend Chrissy fake name  and also 27 year old female has been of their   own fiance since they were 20. they only got  engaged this year and it was kind of weird how   it took him so long to propose since he seemed  to be financially stable and all throughout the   years I asked Chrissy why her fiance hadn't  proposed yet and she kept insisting it was   not the right time but she'd never see the reason  why just that it wasn't the right time eventually   he proposed in the beginning of 2022 and they're  planning their wedding for next year they decided   to plan their engagement party during summer time  because due to busy schedules they couldn't do it   earlier so their engagement party was this past  Saturday and her fiance made a speech dedicated   to her and mentioned pretty much the reasons  they didn't get engaged sooner and I couldn't   help but pity my friend so the reason was that he  didn't have a stable job for the first few years   of their relationship and only jumped from  position to position from Walmart to Target   Etc he hadn't finished his degree yet so he  had no higher education he got his degree in 29   teen and only then was he able to get a proper  job he bragged and also thanked Chrissy for never   giving up on him and growing with him and how they  helped each other form their amazing personalities   and achievements and how no matter what the future  holds he'll never forget Etc my fiance and I felt   some type of way about it some friends of mine  and Chrissy agreed how Chrissy basically stayed   with a broke man and waited for seven years and  we don't think that something praiseworthy but   pity worthy as friends we decided to explain  to her our perspective of how we think it was   ridiculous that she had to almost reach 30 to move  on with her life with that man when someone else   could provide what she needed much sooner Chrissy  always said how she wanted marriage and kids and   it's sad she had to wait this long for this man  to get his act together and she didn't know her   worth she said she loves him and he's an amazing  partner and wouldn't break up with him over his   missed fortunes and what matters is they love  each other I told her it's dumb how she's marrying   for love and not for stability and how she's  basically wasted herself for love and how the   first issue should be raised when he was working  Walmart and Target back to back she called us all   materialistic and classist and said she doesn't  care if she struggles financially as long as she   struggles with the right person who will value  her emotions and listen to her she said we're   miserable witches who will find no happiness  in life and are very shallow could we be the   jerks for criticizing her this way I think it's  pretty clear that op is the jerk if they've been   together all those years they say they're in love  they say they've been happy together they've have   more than enough reason to have been together  for all those years then who the heck does OP   think they are for coming in and saying oh well  you should have found the first person that had a   million dollars and locked that up not this schlub  what did he show you love and respect he only we   worked at Walmart you should have left them years  ago frankly I think Chrissy was right in that last   paragraph this next story is from Jam Whopper am  I the jerk for refusing to go on family vacation   unless my mom lets my boyfriend come I 22 year old  female and one of seven children I'm the youngest   and all of my siblings are over 10 years older  than me they're all married but only one of them   has children my dad left when I was seven and  none of us have heard from him since we didn't   go on any family vacations after we left because  my mom was too anxious and then by the time she   wasn't my siblings all had their own lives my mom  decided last year that she wanted to go on a huge   family vacation it's out of the country and for  15 days all of my siblings are going to be there   along with their Partners the vacation is next  week I've been with my boyfriend now for about   six months and I thought it was a given that my  mom would pay for my boyfriend to come too when   I mentioned it to her she laughed thinking I was  joking she said said it's a family vacation where   all of us are going to be spending actual time  together for the first time in a long time and she   doesn't want to pay for someone she barely knows  to be there I said this was unfair and I told her   I refused to go unless she would let them come  she's upset and my siblings are all saying I'm   a jerk but I just don't think it's fair when all  of my siblings partners are going am I the jerk I   think op is the jerk for expecting the mom to pay  for the boyfriend of six months very likely this   whole trip was being planned before the boyfriend  even was in the picture it would be one thing for   you both to pay for your boyfriend and ask if  they can come along to the family vacation but   it's a whole other thing to just expect them  to be paid for and brought along as well our   next story is from Centric wave 3779 am I the  jerk for refusing to give my husband money to   go on the trip that his friend excluded me from  my female 35 husband male 33 has a male 32 Friend   Austin that he's known from college they're like  brothers and together they extended their friend   group now the group has over seven guys who hang  out together all the time Austin and I don't get   along he seems to be mocking my infertility and  brings it up occasionally it hurts because I've   always wanted children and for him to make it a  constant topic of conversation hurts my husband   thinks it's just me being hypersensitive anyway  about a month ago Austin and I got into a fight   after he commented on my infertility by saying  that I should hurry up and give him a nephew   and niece because my biological clock is ticking  we were planning on going to a trip together but   Austin disinvited me because I yelled at him  for what he said and ruined his dinner I said   I was perfectly okay with that in fact I felt so  much relief that I no longer had to be around him   anymore my husband for the first time was okay  with me being away from Austin but said that he   still wants to go on that trip I said nothing till  he told me that he still expects me to pay for his   travel expenses I refused and said that he was on  his own he started an argument about how I'm doing   this to punish him for not staying home with me  and told me that my issue is with Austin not him   I told him he could go get the money elsewhere  but he's unable to borrow any more money and add   to his debts after he got fired in may he insisted  and I refused he started calling me spiteful and   unfair to refuse to pay for his travel expenses  as an attempt to get him to stay home with me he   said his relationship with Austin is bigger than  just a few comments Austin made and bigger than   my exaggerated sensitivity and insecurity now he's  sulking until I cave in and give him the money am   I the jerk for insisting on not paying I think  op is definitely not the jerk here and I don't   think they should pay a dime towards that trip  it's clear that both Austin and her husband have   no respect for how op feel in this situation if  Austin was a true friend of op's husband they   wouldn't be making that kind of comment about  their spouse and honestly if the husband was   any kind of respectful he wouldn't allow that  kind of talk coming from his friend either our   next story is from bearware 671 am I the jerk for  walking out of my five-year-old niece's birthday   party and taking her present with me I 24 year old  female my niece five female and my sister-in-law   Megan 25 year old female yesterday was my niece's  birthday my nieces my sister-in-law's first born   and my sister-in-law is currently pregnant with  her fourth child when I received the invitation   to the party there was a note asking everyone  to not forget about the mommy when shopping for   birthday gifts that my niece's birthday was also  meant to celebrate the woman who carried her for   nine months I'll be honest that I'm not Megan's  biggest fan I've always found her to be a large   drama queen so when I read that I was supposed to  bring her her a present to her daughter's birthday   party I was annoyed and knew that I would be doing  no such thing for my niece's birthday I made her a   large wool hand crocheted blanket and matching  teddy bear when it came time to open gifts it   was Megan sitting on a chair in the center of the  living room with my nieces sitting on the floor   next to her Megan opened every single present  even the ones meant for my niece it was only   after she was done that she would hand the open  present to my niece when it came time to open my   present I watched his Megan open my gift shuffled  past the teddy bear and blanket and proceeded to   search for her gift when Megan found no other  present she looked up and asked me if there was   another present for me in the pile I responded no  disappointed Megan took the blanket out of the box   and proceeded to ask me questions like where did  you get such a cute blanket and I hope you didn't   break the bank with such an extravagant present  her tone came across as sincere but the way she   stared at me from across the room definitely  gave me a different impression I responded to   her questions by saying that I made the teddy bear  and blanket myself and that it was no trouble for   my little niece Megan Chuckles and asks me in  front of the whole party if I had actually made   the gifts I responded absolutely Megan and I  go back and forth in front of everyone for a   minute but Megan ends the conversation by saying  that I didn't actually make the gifts because I   didn't collect the wool for the blanket or make  the buttons on the bear myself that for something   to be handmade you have to use only your hands  from start to finish otherwise it doesn't count   after my mother-in-law pulled me aside she was  extremely upset with me for antagonizing Megan   no one in the family likes Megan but my in-laws  play nice because when they didn't Megan and her   husband moved halfway across the country they just  recently moved back to town after my mother-in-law   thoroughly lectured me on keeping the peace she  asked me to leave the party go buy Megan a present   and to come back when I'm ready with an apology  instead I left the party and took my presents   with me all day today I've been playing telephone  with friends and relatives of Megan all of them   accusing me of ruining my niece's birthday party  and telling me I'm a jerk for stealing my niece's   birthday presents I'm gonna say Ops not the jerk  here op said that their intention on taking the   gifts back with them is to re-gift them to the  niece later on one-on-one I think that's fair   because who knows what Megan would do after  the party feeling upset feeling slighted that   on their daughter's birthday they didn't get  presents personally I feel like Megan sounds   like an awful mom our next story is from Delilah  781 am I the jerk for how I reacted to my family   joking about how they thought I would marry our  family friend slash my ex in front of my boyfriend   when I was nine I had a fake wedding and my X  was the groom recently during my dad's birthday   dinner the fake wedding got brought up because  my parents found some pictures from that day and   they were being passed around during the dinner  my family my ex's family and some other friends   were all cracking jokes about how they thought  we would eventually have a real wedding at one   point my brother said it was too bad my ex hadn't  been a gentleman and lost his chance because now   the wedding was never going to happen my ex said  Never Say Never and everybody was cheering him   on even though I told them to stop as I could see  my boyfriend was getting upset they wouldn't drop   it and my boyfriend ended up leaving early after  having an argument with me I was really upset and   angry after he left so when it was suggested  we should recreate some old childhood photos   including the wedding ones I yielded them to shut  up and to stop talking about the stupid wedding   and how a real one would never happen everyone  got quiet and it was awkward so I ended up going   to sit out outside because I was still so angry  and didn't want to be around them in the end my   ex came outside and told me it was just a joke and  I didn't need to yell at everybody he brought up   how I've never minded the jokes in the past not  even after we broke up and how I shouldn't let my   boyfriend's insecurity cause me to get angry at my  family over a long-standing joke am I the jerk I   think op is not the jerk because of one reason op  singing stop joking about it stop talking about it   stop going on about it I'm of the opinion that  if there's something from somebody's childhood   that somebody's embarrassed about doesn't want  to hear about doesn't want to joke about and they   specifically say stop bringing it up that should  be more than respected and they especially should   have stopped when it was clear that it upset the  boyfriend enough to the point where they left our   next story is from dinosaur Khaleesi would I be  the jerk if I asked my co-worker to stop saying   God bless you in their emails short and to the  point in my job I have a remote co-worker in   another country who I send lists of work we want  them to do every time they ride back and just   say thank you God bless or have a blessed day I'm  atheist and it honestly kind of annoys me I don't   know if it's a common sign off in his country and  I don't want to unintentionally start a big drama   I'm just wondering if it's worth addressing  or if I would be a jerk to do so I think you   would be a jerk if you brought this up now if this  co-worker was signing off their emails like thank   you God shines his light on you every single day  or thank you may you accept God every single day   or something that kind of actually pushes their  religion onto you or infers that you believe in   anything in any such way or that you should maybe  you'd have something there but what this person   is saying shouldn't affect you in any way they're  just basically wishing you well this next story   is from goofy can wait am I the jerk for refusing  to pay half of my son's ticket my ex and I split   costs for our son if one of us take take some  shopping for school supplies the other sends half   the bill we split his fees for art class and pay  for half of all supplies wire colored pencils so   expensive if one of us takes some clothes shopping  the other gets half the bill everything is 50 50.   we also have alternating weeks but in the summer I  get four weeks and she gets four weeks my ex just   sent me a bill for half of my son's portion of her  family vacation I immediately called and said that   I'm under no circumstances paying for that I'm  not subsidizing their vacation I don't ask her to   chip in for my vacations my ex said that that's  because I take our son camping and other cheap   activities and asking for such a paltry sum would  be Petty but theme park tickets are expensive she   said I need to pay for half of his ticket at the  very least I said no I didn't tell them to go to   Disney if I'm going to buy a Disney ticket I'll  buy two and take them myself I'm not paying for   their Vacation full stop it's also ridiculous that  she thought thought I'd chip in for their hotel   it's no more expensive with my son there than it  would be without lodging wise we went back and   forth and eventually she gave up her parting jab  was that her husband might make her reschedule the   trip to fall during my custody time I said fine  I'll take him myself in a few years when he's   old enough to enjoy everything I'm still steamed  and told my sister my sister says I'm the jerk   because going to Disney is way more expensive than  camping and why should my ex and her husband have   to shoulder that cost alone I said it's because  it's their vacation and their idea if my son told   me he wanted to go to Disney I would take him  but I would stay at a cheaper hotel and wait   until he's old enough to really enjoy everything  it feels like this trips more for the benefit of   her stepkids and my son's just being tacked on  that's fine but I'm not paying for that am I being   a jerk I think op is definitely not the jerk here  if the mom is watching the kid and they decide to   go to Disney I don't see how the Dad should be  responsible for the kids ticket the dad's not   taking them to Disney the dad doesn't get to go  I don't understand why that would be so hard to   understand and our final story of the day is from  that guy yup yup am I the jerk for denying guy the   job for a comment I perceived as a racist that was  made five years ago I had a guy interview for a   position he did well in his interview had great  credentials nice guy so then I do a background   search turns out this guy used to be a real piece  of work on the internet all really old comments   but he would go around trolling people on his  Facebook profile most of the stuff was just rude   jokes but there was a comment in which a person  replied a black person to him making fun of him   the guy replies calling him an insult involving  knuckles I had never heard that before I looked   this up and people are saying it means like [ __ ]  I found some sources that say it's a racist thing   to say so I made the decision not to hire him as I  have zero tolerance for racism of any form usually   when I'm not going to hire someone I just move on  and don't tell him anything I figured I would let   him know though because there's a lot on that  profile people would deny him a job for I was   just looking for racism misogyny General bigotry  figured I'd tell him so he'd be more aware of   these things online and if he is a racist cleanup  is act so I emailed him that I found this comment   and will not be hiring him due to worries about  him being racist I was expecting a very aggressive   reply but what he sent me was basically him saying  what I'm so confused I can't believe this I'm so   sorry I'm not racist now I feel like a jerk was I  right or wrong so I'm gonna be honest I've never   really heard the term very much myself being used  before but from all indications online it seems   like this is kind of essentially just calling  somebody stupid like a caveman the overwhelming   amount of comments on this post say that op is  clearly the jerk and that the term is not a racist   term like I said personally I've never really even  seen the term before so I'm not sure from what I   can tell op is the jerk for assuming that it is a  racist term again overwhelmingly everybody on this   post seems to say that this is definitely not a  racist insult what do you guys think is this alone   enough to say this guy is unhirable let me know  down in the comments am I the jerk for leaving the   hospital and going home after my husband called me  ugly while waking up from his surgery I'm female   25 my husband male 32 had undergone surgery days  ago the surgery required anesthesia and his family   and I waited till the evening for him to wake up  he was in and out for a while but then started   regaining Consciousness gradually the nurse gave  me a signal to go in with his mom I stood by his   bed and he was speaking to his mom he then turned  his head towards me made a face and asked who I   was I told him my name but couldn't recognize me  I don't know if this was deliberate I told him I   was his wife and he frowned and said no no you  can't be my wife you're ugly this made me upset   and I was completely floored at what he said I  didn't know what to say I just stared at him while   he looked away I quietly stepped out and told his  family and Mom that I was going home his mom kept   shouting after me saying I was overreacting and  that I shouldn't just go home and leave her son   alone when he was just waking up I got home  cried my eyes out and then called my dad he   called me down but then said I should stop being  too sensitive and that my husband didn't know   what he was saying and so he didn't mean it and  couldn't control it I argue that he must think I'm   ugly since I heard that people under the effect of  anesthesia are like drunk people and tell what's   really on their mind dad laughed at this and said  that still walking out like that probably wasn't   ideal and it must have upset my in-laws ex my  mother-in-law I admit being too cautious and   insecure about my look I don't see myself pretty  so I don't expect him to lie and say I am but   calling me ugly this I couldn't let go I think  Ops not the jerk because I understand it could   be a heartbreaking and honestly stressful thing  to hear but you also do have to really understand   that this dude was on some hard-hitting stuff  and frankly for some people it might be a truth   serum but for some people they may think they're  the new leader of a new Colony on Jupiter do you   guys think that op should take these comments  personally let me know what you guys think down   in the comments our next story is from Dad of a  forever boy am I the jerk for throwing a gender   reveal party for my son instead in the same  week as my sister's baby shower I'm a 47 year   old single dad of a 19 year old young man who was  born as a female we lost his mom to covet in the   first wave he came out to us as trans three years  ago and completed his transition just a few weeks   ago my sister's pregnant with her fifth child  and is doing a baby shower slash gender reveal   next weekend the whole family is invited her  baby's due at the end of July I'm throwing my   son a gender reveal party this Thursday he always  wanted one ever since he came out and now that   he's officially a man we're finally throwing  one the whole family is invited though some   won't come because they don't approve we sent  out invitations two months ago my sister told   me she'll see about coming because she's heavily  pregnant and I put her down for a maybe yesterday   she called me fuming said that a lot of the family  members are actually coming to my son's party and   since this is the first family thing since kovid  this will be the first big party and then her baby   shower will just be an afterthought I told her  I'm not moving my son's party because everyone   will still attend her baby shower on the weekend  she said I'm faking a gender reveal party and I   told her that's ridiculous she said it won't even  be a proper gender reveal because he's not a baby   then I just said that she can either come or not  her choice but I'm not moving the date am I the   jerk honestly I think regardless of what kind of  party it is if you plan it two months in advance   especially before any other plans pop up in the  family you're totally justified to continue on   the course especially considering it's happening  in the next week or so I don't see how op could be   the jerk here our next story is from throw ra4t33  am I the jerk for refusing to let my husband's mom   nap in my room my husband's mom moved in with us a  week ago the minute we were informed she was going   to move in temporary till her house gets renovated  we've emptied a room specifically for her it has   everything a bed with a frame curtains mounted TV  wardrobe Etc she was thrilled with it and loved   it a lot one day I came home and found her in my  bedroom sleeping in mine and my husband's bed I   was confused but she told me she took a nap on  the bed and lost track of time since then she   started talking about how she loved the nap there  and started hinting wanting to take naps in the   bedroom from now on I kept ignoring her comments  till my husband sat me down and told me that his   mom really liked and got used to napping in our  bedroom and we should just let her have her daily   afternoon nap in the room I said absolutely not  and we started debating I told him his mom is   being ridiculous because she has a whole room  upstairs where she should nap he got upset and   said that I was making his mom feel uncomfortable  and unwelcome with this attitude I said no and   refused to negotiate he called me selfish and mean  for saying no and preventing his mom from feeling   comfortable at his house but I reminded him that  I pay full mortgage for the house while he blows   money over gadgets and consoles he accused me  of bringing old disagreements in this current   conflict to use against him I said no again and  that he should stop pushing because I need the   room for when I get home feeling exhausted from  working on my feet from 6am he's refusing to speak   to me till I agree and let his mom have her nap in  there am I the jerk for choosing this hill to die   on as he says am I being difficult I think Ops not  the jerk if they laid down and they accidentally   fell asleep there one time that's one thing but  I'm not gonna lie I kind of would be a little   grossed out from sharing my bed repeatedly with  with my mother-in-law I feel like I personally   can have slight germaphobic Tendencies so I'm  picturing you know this mother-in-law bringing   in whatever dead skin bacteria germs dirt whatever  every single day under your bed under your pillows   on your covers when you got your own bed use your  own bed and who wants to get home wanting to relax   and finding out you can't because your bed's  being rented out and what about the knowledge   that I mean you've probably hooked up in that bed  I think there's just too many factors that go into   allowing yourself to be comfortable with this idea  our next story is from dope Master 865 am I the   jerk am I an unsupportive husband my wife wants  to drag me and the kids on a two-hour Drive each   Direction so she can go and meet up with some high  school friends neither are kids nor I were invited   to join them so we're just along for the ride and  then the fun of finding something to do in a town   that has nothing but box doors for the four hours  that she's hanging out keep in mind it'll roughly   be 95 to 100 degrees outside as well or else I  take the kids to a park I am all for her hanging   out with her old friends but I offer to watch the  kids at home instead this way I can get the kids   together with other friends and take them swimming  or to the beach Etc they have way more options and   my wife can take all the time she wants with her  friends I'm being told that I'm a selfish jerk   and not supporting her the only difference is  I can do something more fun with the kids and   we aren't stuck in a car for four hours when we  have nothing to do there anyway in my mind that's   being supportive I'm happy to spend time with the  kids and to let her have fun with her friends for   as long as she wants the only thing I'd rather  not do is get dragged on multiple hours of car   rides plus the task of finding something to  do in a boring Town while I can stay home and   have more to do here with the kids can someone  tell me if I'm being selfish and unsupportive   for not being told exactly what and how to do  with the time that she won't be around anyway   way thanks a totally unsupportive jerk so frankly  I think Ops definitely not the jerk and I think   the wife is projecting pretty darn hard here it's  pretty impressive for the wife to claim that the   husband is the one being selfish when op wants  their husband and kids to come with them at a car   and wait around and figure out something else  to do while she's busy for four hours I agree   wholeheartedly with OP they're being really  supportive by saying go I'll watch the kids   everything will be locked down here you go have  fun with your friends that's supportive she's   the one being selfish here by the way if you're  enjoying these stories make sure to hit those   like And subscribe buttons down below so you never  miss any of my daily videos our next story is from   objective number 8088 am I the jerk for telling  my son about why his mom and I aren't together my   son just turned 10. his mom and I broke up when he  was two we never married the deal was that for us   instant physical attraction carry the relationship  entirely we basically went from her saying you're   really cute and me saying gosh darn you're pretty  to having a kid very quickly we tried to flesh out   the relationship after he was born it caused a lot  of arguments and we figured out that we were just   too different of people we share custody and the  only times I'm ever really around her for what I'd   call an extended period of time is when we're  doing something for Christmas or his birthday   things like that the way I parent I'm very honest  with him I don't see much of a reason to give him   a bunch of words solid answers to questions last  week he asked what happened between his mom and   I I told him that his mom is one of those people  where if she's not choreographing and directing   everything around her she's not happy I told him I  just felt like I was losing myself the more I was   around her I thought it was a pretty tame answer  I didn't rant Rave cussed up a storm or anything   I also assumed he'd keep it between us last night  I get a phone call from my ex telling me that In   the Heat of an argument with her about cleaning  up his room he'd let it fly about what I said she   said I should have passed on the question then  told her he asked it so that we could be on the   same page my point to her was I don't believe I  said anything toxic or outlandish she had me talk   to him and I told him to apologize to her and pick  up his room am I the jerk it is a good policy to   be honest but just from the setup op had in the  story to what they told their own kid I don't   know if Opie's even being honest writing the story  for us and I will say being honest put in a more   ambiguous way especially for a 10 year old kid  might be more applicable it could have very easily   had just said it just didn't work out between  us sometimes it works that way I don't think   that in any way would have been lying and doesn't  just randomly dump on your ex for no justifiable   reason after all these years this next story is  from Independence safe 1780 am I the jerk for   kicking out my boyfriend's 19 year old daughter  my boyfriend of three years moved into my home   three weeks ago after his lease went up and he was  unable to renew with the price hike they expected   his rent was sixteen hundred dollars for a two  bedroom and upon signing a new lease they said it   was now twenty four hundred dollars I have a three  bedroom home and one son eleven both his room   and my room have an attached bathroom the guest  room does not we lived here for five years and I   bought it last year my boyfriend has a 19 year old  daughter named Jess who visits him on the weekends   and lives at home with her mother literally never  had any issues with her up until my boyfriend   moved in when he moved in Jess started becoming  this witchy snob who had demand after demand that   she fully expected me to meet like she wanted me  to kick my son out of his room so she could have   the room with an attached bathroom stating that a  boy didn't need a bathroom as much as a girl did   when I said absolutely not she got extremely rude  rude and condescending whenever she was in my home   she also tried parenting my son on more than one  occasion telling him what he can and cannot watch   on the TV what he can and cannot snack on Etc  there's been times when he's tried talking to   us and Jess will butt in and say something  about how kids are so freaking annoying if   I speak up to her she says I don't believe I was  talking to you or rolls her eyes at me pulled for   someone who doesn't pay any rent or food cost to  be staying in my home I told her father last week   that either he gets a handle on his adult kid or  she was getting booted to the curb he immediately   starts telling me that I need to give her time  because this is an adjustment for her and that   apparently she's having a hard time at her mom's  house due to them arguing all the time I told him   that it wasn't my problem and that in my house  me and my son were not going to be treated like   crap because she can't control her emotions  and wants to take her resentment out on us   he said he would talk to her his talk did nothing  at all in fact she confronted me about it and said   I don't know what game you're playing here but  respect is earned not given and I will not be   granting you respect until you prove to me you  deserve it she then walks to the living room   where my son was watching TV and takes the remote  from him and tells him to move at this point I go   in and immediately tell her to get out of my house  she tells me she isn't going anywhere because her   dad lives here so I end up calling her uncle who  is a police officer and have her escorted from my   house after she collected all her belongings my  boyfriend said that I crossed the line so I told   him he can leave too he currently isn't speaking  to me locked away in my bedroom am I the jerk I   think Ops definitely not the jerk here and good on  op for having a spine when this boyfriend cannot   control their own kid and let's be real she's 19  years old she's too old to give the benefit of the   doubt and tolerate any kind of that behavior  from and she has no legal right whatsoever to   stay in your house if the boyfriend can't get a  grip on their kid and clearly they don't want to   I'm with OP both of them can get kicked to the  curb don't waste your time on that nonsense not   a surprise they're arguing with their mom too our  next story is from throw ra wrong1b am I the jerk   for telling my brother-in-law's girlfriend she's  boring because all she talks about is her job my   34 year old female brother-in-law's girlfriend  Faye 32 year old female recently got a new   job she got her Masters in 2020 and never stops  talking about it my husband 36 Jack has noticed   the same thing and he said his brother Luke 32  talks about it too it gets on our nerves but we   tolerate it because we know how excited Faye is  about her degree and now this new job which she   also won't stop talking about because as she says  she wouldn't have gotten it if she didn't pursue   her Masters since it's a requirement we have them  over for dinner last night with my parents and my   father and mother-in-law once again Faye brings up  her new job it doesn't start for another couple of   weeks she works in education so her contracts  are based on the school calendar and she was   talking about all the things she gets to do now  that she really wanted to do she mentioned it   being a life goal I asked her what was next she  asked what I meant I asked her about things like   kids or marriage since they've been together for  three years now she said she doesn't want to rush   into marriage or kids until she had her goals in  order but marriage was something she and Luke had   been seriously discussing I asked when she'd have  time for kids or marriage with her career goals   she said she'd make time I said kids are a lot  of work I'm a stay-at-home mom I told her that   when I was pregnant it wasn't feasible financially  or logically to continue working as an STNA so I   quit at 26. Faye said that she doesn't want kids  that she can't provide for and she likes relying   on herself because so many stay at home moms are  financially trapped when they stop working and can   leave if the marriage falls apart for whatever  reason I'll be honest I was offended by that I   told her that not all of us are trapped she agreed  but said you never know and you should depend on   yourself even in marriage Luke was nodding and  agreeing I said it would also give you more to   talk about other than your job they asked if I  had a problem with her talking about her job I   said no but honestly it's the only thing she seems  to have That's mildly interesting everyone else   talks about kids home life vacations family  Hobbies but all you talk about is your degree   education and this new job of yours and I told  her it was kind of boring Faye said then I won't   bore you any further and ask my in-laws how  installing wood floors was going we all moved   on past the conversation until later that night  after Luke and Faye left my mother-in-law told   me I was rude I told her I was telling the truth  because we are all tired of hearing about it Jack   agreed but mother-in-law said while that was true  it's still an accomplishment no one looking me up   and down in this family had done yet and I seemed  jealous I said I wasn't jealous but offended by   some of the things she said mother-in-law told  me I was only offended because Faye was right   Jack said she was right but it was obvious she was  directing those comments at me in a judgmental way   and my parents agree with me am I the jerk frankly  I think op is pretty clearly the jerk I think op   is overly judgmental and when op instilled the  topic of discussion of kids marriage phase wishes   desires and goals with marriage with kids they  were directly inquiring about the exact thing Faye   said it wasn't some like weird prompted targeted  thing Opie literally asked them about basically   prioritizing your job versus prioritizing having  kids well fate clearly feels a certain way and   they shared their ideological thinking as to why  they wouldn't stop up and have kids sometime soon   Opie's not only really judgmental and just a jerk  but also feels the need to be villainized somehow   our next story is from sad poets am I the jerk for  smiling while my mother-in-law scolded my husband   for poking my belly and saying it was like dough I  gave birth to our first child three weeks ago and   my body hasn't snapped back yet I definitely feel  insecure about it to the point where I won't even   change in front of my husband anymore yesterday I  was laying down on him and my top wrote up so you   could see my belly slightly he stroked it and then  poked it and made a comment about how my belly was   like dough I know my reaction was irrational but  I burst into tears my in-laws were there and my   mother-in-law was furious with my husband and she  started scolding him for not being careful with   his words my husband tried to defend himself but  my mother-in-law kept telling him off I started   smiling and my husband got upset with me for  being happy he was getting into trouble am I the   jerk I'm sorry is Opie's husband like freshly  19 they're acting like a total kid here I'm   definitely not one in the same with Opie's husband  but if I had a partner that had just given birth   I wouldn't be poking their stomach and saying it  feels like dough just be supportive why say dumb   stuff like that the husband was definitely mean  and I think op's feelings are more than Justified   I'm sorry but these people like this husband  and the stay-at-home mom champion in The Last   Story really frustrate me with their senseless  perspectives this next story is from complex   cup 7367 am I the jerk for defending my dad's  girlfriend for wearing a bikini to my fiance's   bridal shower my dad's been dating Tiffany  for a year and a half she's honestly really   annoying I'm not gonna lie I recently got engaged  to my girlfriend of three years Melissa and we're   currently wedding planning her mom and maid of  honor recently threw her a bridal shower as an   olive branch Tiffany and my mom were invited  for some background Melissa does struggle with   insecurities and self-esteem she's also very very  into things being Picture Perfect which sometimes   results in anxiety she also hates how the women  in my family dress she totally gets it isn't her   business and she would never say anything but  she's confided to me that she hates it for the   bridal shower most of the women wore sundresses  Tiffany wore something which looked like to me a   roughly crop top and a matching skirt I thought  I looked fine she did mention she was leaving   early because she had plans during the shower  Melissa realized that what Tiffany was wearing   was actually a bikini because the skirt was  pretty see-through and she could make out the   bottoms she asked her but tried to laugh it off  and Tiffany admitted it was a bikini because she   was going out of my dad's boat after and wouldn't  have time to change my future Mother-in-law asked   Tiffany if she found it a bit weird Tiffany said  no and she thought it passed as a crop top Melissa   and her bridesmaids went off and talked about it  and and Melissa decided that she was offended but   declined her mom's offer to kick Tiffany out  when Tiffany was leaving she said goodbye and   my fiance said I hope you had fun and I hope you  found the attention you were looking for I heard   this through my mom's sister and then Melissa at  this point I was sick of hearing about it and I   was annoyed because my mom was trying to make it  into a much bigger issue and act like I shouldn't   marry Melissa over it which I promptly shut down  by the time I talked to Melissa she was heated   and calling Tiffany an attention who are in a  show-off she asked if my mom had said anything   because I guess my mom was rolling her eyes at  her at the shower I told her I talked to my mom   and told her to shut up Melissa then asked me if  I hated Tiffany I said that I don't hate her and   then I said to be honest I think her outfit was  fine it just looked like a crop top and if that   ruined the day for Melissa that is something  Melissa needs to work on that upset Melissa   and she feels that I was brushing her feelings  aside she said I should talk to my dad and I told   her I wasn't going to and that's embarrassing she  stormed off and is now refusing to talk about it I   think we need a little bit more context as to like  where the venue was and like because everybody   else pretty much wearing sundresses and then they  show up with a probably pretty small cut crop top   it's a bridal shower not a bachelorette party so  showing up with a really skimpy looking outfit or   at least very minimal clothing whether or not  it was for attention or not seems just a bit   out of place for a bridal shower no matter what  justification op who I think is the jerk tries to   make the fact of the matter is she wore a bikini  to a bridal shower our next stories from supposed   gold digger am I the jerk for refusing to be a  bridesmaid in my sister's wedding I 28 year old   female come from a big extended family including  me and my sister 23 year old female there's 24   female cousins and 17 male cousins half of the  cousins are already married when the first one   ever asked me to be a bridesmaid I declined when  I attend a wedding I want to have fun eat food   and dance in exchange I'll get you a gift I do not  want to spend my energy time and money on your big   day and when I get married I won't have a bridal  party nor will I expect a bachelorette party well   all of the cousins understood there were no hard  feelings and to be honest with that many cousins   it wasn't even an issue now my younger sister is  getting married she asked me to be a bridesmaid   and I declined and I did it very gently I told  her sorry but with working full-time being in the   final stages of preparing my thesis and teaching  some summer classes that I would not make a good   bridesmaid also my sister is a total bridezilla  the dresses she's looking at for her party are   450 dollars she expects a weekend Bachelorette  read in Vegas with all the bells and whistles and   wants everyone to attend dance classes to learn  this elaborate dance to surprise her with I do   not have the energy for all that ish now she said  I'm not invited to her wedding if I'm not willing   to put forth the effort to make her day perfect  then I don't deserve to be there honestly I don't   care but my mom and some ants are calling me a  jerk so am I the jerk I'm not gonna lie and this   might make me sound like a jerk but I've not gone  to some weddings for much much much less than this   450 dollars getting out to Vegas for a surprise  party and learning some like flash mob dance   thing I'm sorry but that is asking just too much  especially if not doing all that makes me deserve   to not be there this next story is from sprawling  Jaguar am I the jerk for excluding my father's   Affair child for my late dad's birthday slash  anniversary party the party was two months ago   but the this is still coming up so I just want to  get some external opinions in February it came out   that my father had a child out of marriage let's  call him Ali and Ali is 24. it was a shock since   no one expected it but we took the tests and he  is Dad's son he's an okay guy but I grew up with   three siblings and they're the only siblings I'll  ever know so don't have much of a relationship but   I acknowledge Him and we get along when we see  each other June 18th is my father's birthday and   what would have been my parents 50th anniversary  my mother had been really looking forward to this   Milestone while he was alive so we planned the  small party to celebrate what would have been 50   years of marriage and his birthday just a nice  lunch with my Aunt uncles and grandmother as   well as a visit to his grave my sister told Ollie  about the plan and he asked to be involved since   we're celebrating dad's birthday the problem is  that my mother is still struggling to accept him   and the fact that Dad cheated she's in therapy  for this and since this was a dual birthday and   a wedding anniversary inviting the kid he had  out of marriage seems like adding salt to the   wound so I said no he couldn't be involved in the  party however we can make arrangements to go to   the grave as siblings with him afterwards and then  have dinner together on me since he is dad's son   in the end my sister told me Ollie was offended  and mad at me for treating him like an outsider   and tried to come Gate Crash but my husband saw  him outside and just asked him not to I only found   out about this afterwards him and my two sisters  ended up going to the Grave alone after everything   ended and had dinner without me I understand where  he's coming from but I also believe I made a fair   compromise under the circumstances am I the jerk  I personally think Ops not the jerk here because   I feel like what op was doing was merely looking  out for the best interest of everybody involved   here I think the offer Opie made to Ali was more  than generous and it sucks that it affects Ali in   the way it does but I don't think op's a jerk  for it and our final story of the day is from   Brother issue throwaway am I the jerk for leaving  my brother on my porch my wife grew up rough she   had a very very hard time due to personal issues  her parents weren't in the picture she was left   to fend for her South she was forced to do a lot  of things against her will literally live in the   back of gas stations or stores at the age of  16. she's had a lot of things that she's had   to get out of habit from like going days without  eating days without showering severe insomnia and   jumpy at any loud sounds she's working on those  though I'm a rather wealthy person upper middle   class my wife is the cutest but is so darn sad she  gets very excited at grocery stores because she's   able to get any treat or food she wants she gets  super excited at things other people would dread   my brother is very spoiled my parents struggled  to parent him they gave in at any command he said   he gets off the hook for everything they couldn't  deal with him so they sent him with me I set rules   and consequences he has to go donate anything he  doesn't use or doesn't fit he had to get a job   Etc this was fine he was doing better lately my  wife's been doing a lot of what I explained before   jumpy forgetting to eat waking up at odd hours  this was weird I came home from work and overheard   my brother and my wife my wife was asleep on the  couch my brother goes over and purposely bangs on   the wall making siren noises I've informed my  brother what he can't do regarding my wife my   wife jumped up looking scared I told my brother  who was surprised to go to his room which he did   this wasn't the first time he's did this according  to my wife she said he's shaking her in her sleep   stole whatever food she was eating she said he's  been throwing away all her soaps and washes too I   was baffled one I didn't know about this two my  brother he's 18 he's old enough to know better   I talked to my brother and he said that he was  just messing with her and that this was probably   good so she can get over whatever weird fear she  has he proceeded to say that the way she had it   wasn't that bad and she practically got money for  free so so I took his stuff put it in big plastic   bags and set them on the driveway and told him  to get out he was taken aback and asked if I was   just going to leave him out there in the heat it  was 76. he said just because she was broke doesn't   mean I have to treat him like a hobo I took him  outside and locked the door he was banging on the   door for a few I called my parents and told  him he can't stay here they're about a three   hours drive away I even gave the kid water when  my parents got there they were pissed they said   that he was rude but I was ridiculous for such a  harsh punishment and he could have been kidnapped   or passed out he's 200 pounds seated in a gated  community I don't feel bad I think this taught him   to stop taking things for granted but they don't  think so while he's definitely not going to stop   taking things for granted when Mommy and Daddy  come to put the diaper back up on him I'm sorry   did you terrorize his wife and he got mad at you  and kicked you out I'm sorry come back here Mommy   and Daddy got you Opie is clearly not the jerk am  I the jerk for refusing to pay for a dress that   my bridesmaid ripped in the store I 25 year old  female am getting married my future husband John   has a new siblings one aunt and only one first  cousin Casey 23 year old female so John asked   me to include her in the wedding I told all three  bridesmaids that I'd pay for their dresses at the   appointment the girls picked a few dresses from  the display models up front the sales associate   explained that she would go to the back and pull  the ready to try dresses and that going up one   to two sizes is normal for formal wear the plan  was for them to head into the changing area and   when they all had a dress on they'd come out as  a group to show me John's mother and Aunt Casey's   mother told me to look at the bridal accessories  so this part is second hand for my bridesmaids   the associate brought dresses into the dressing  area and Casey was irritated that she fell into   the plus line which started at size 18 both  on principle and because two of the dresses   apparently weren't available in plus size to try  on she argued and refused to try on anything above   a 14 but the associate warned her to not go  below a 16. Casey has always squeezed herself   in a tight-fitting clothes and is very focused on  in her words unfair and misleading sizing between   Brands refusing to see that in reality she's about  a size 18 or 20 so 22-24 in formal wear while I   was on the other side of the store I saw Casey  quickly walk out and grab a dress off a mannequin   but I didn't think too much of it however the  sales associate pulled me aside and told me that   a 250 dollar charge for a dress that ripped would  be added to my bill since I was taking care of   everything when I went to talk to Casey I found  her struggling to zip a too small dress and the   size 14 dress the one she grabbed was hanging  up and had burst open at the side I told Casey   politely but firmly that I wasn't going to pay  for the damaged dress and that she would need   to cover the cost herself to which she insisted  that it was my job to do it we went back and forth   unproductively as Jon's mother and Aunt had come  back over and one of the other bridesmaids told me   that the sales associate had strongly cautioned  against trying smaller dresses Casey attempted   to start another argument about sizing and I cut  her off I told her that there was no way in heck   she's a size 14 and I don't care if she believes  it out in the real world but for the purposes of   this trip and my wedding I needed her to accept  that Casey angrily went back into her dressing   room and refused to come out and her mother told  me to just pay the 250 dollars since Casey was   still an apprentice at the hair salon and didn't  make that much money my bridesmaids backed me up   but Casey's aunt and to a certain extent John's  mother essentially said that Casey wouldn't be   there around these dresses in the first place if  it wasn't for me Casey's mom ultimately paid for   the damaged dress but am I the jerk our next story  is from throwaway batch am I the jerk for having   high expectations for my bachelorette party I 25  year old female am getting married to my wonderful   fiancee 31 year old male this fall a week ago I  had a bachelorette party While most girls dream   of their weddings I dreamed about my bachelorette  weekend I put a lot of planning into this weekend   made a lot of phone calls reservations everything  basically for Thursday night to Sunday morning me   and 25 of my closest girlfriends rented a house  from the start it was a disaster I had told   my girls to get to the house early on Thursday  so they could decorate and set up before I got   there well I got to the house at three and they  weren't done decorating so that bummed me out   because I wanted that wow moment when I came in  and saw the setup I felt robbed but we still had a   decent first night Friday I woke up at 7am to make  breakfast and get ready because we had a pack day   Vineyards boat lunch happy hour drinks then dinner  in the clubs I was getting shaded on all afternoon   because people said they were being rushed from  place to place and had to carry changes of clothes   all day but we only had limited time in the city  and I wanted to make the most of it Saturday was   worse we had brunch at 9am and no one was awake in  time so it only ended up being me and a few loyal   bridesmaids we went shopping after for a few hours  and when we got back to the house no one was even   apologetic even though I was close to tears all  day the last draw for me was later that night when   we were going to dinner and nobody was wearing  the matching shirts we got for the weekend people   wanted to wear their own stuff but that's not what  we agreed on even though my maid of honor notified   everyone at that point I said screw it this  weekend was ruined and locked myself in my room   to cry it was even worse when I came out a few  hours later and half the girls had gone out anyway   without me aka the actual bride I ended up driving  home early on Sunday and left the house a mess for   the girls to pick up because I was so upset now  it's been almost a week no one's really texted   me except some bridesmaids in the maid of honor I  know I sound bridezilla-ish but these are supposed   to be my friends and we were supposed to celebrate  me all weekend and I felt neglected and I'm just   really upset I understand these expectations may  seem like a lot but I made my expectations clear   to the group and they just let me down so bad  tell me am I the jerk I think Ops the jerk here   honestly because as much expectation as they try  to express the these are 25 adults who had to take   time out of their lives to set days aside for op  and honestly even like taking a multi-day vacation   with a small group of friends most often ends up  having changes in plans or changes in whatever you   were expecting I just find it hard to believe that  25 people really worked well in this one house and   also I mean 25 people I don't really consider that  to be close friends if you have 25 close friends   you do a lot of socializing by the way if you're  enjoying these stories make sure to hit those like   And subscribe buttons down below so you never miss  any of my daily videos every video has awesome   stories like our next one from kdot918 am I the  jerk for exposing my cousin's creepy husband to my   entire family I 22 year old female met my cousin's  husband 24 year old female and 26 year old male   last July for their wedding they live several  states away so in addition to meeting him for the   first time it was also the first time I'd seen  my cousin in a few years I instantly got a bad   vibe from him and he made several comments that  rubbed me the wrong way he told me I seemed like   a wild child and said he would bet I'm a bad girl  at my college since meeting him he's followed me   on Instagram and sporadically sends me reels which  I don't open and comments odd things on my posts   like looking good cousin he even dm'd me once hey  I'll be in your state this weekend on business dot   dot dot lol which I never opened either all of  this definitely creeped me out but I didn't feel   like I could say anything about it because my  cousin and I aren't close and I've always felt   like she looks down on me because she's a devout  Christian and I'm not fast forward to this week   one of those fake accounts on Instagram popped  up with some of my pictures asking for money for   x-rated pictures the bio was in broken English the  pictures were poorly cropped screenshots of my two   most recent posts and the cash app was random  strings of numbers and letters the account just   looked very fake and many of my friends sent it  to me and reported the account of course the one   person who apparently fell for it was my cousin's  husband I then got a very long nasty DM from my   cousin telling me that she'd been very tolerant of  my sinful lifestyle whatever that means but this   time I'd gone too far she said she didn't care  that we were family and so long as I was posing   a threat to her marriage I was no longer welcome  in their lives I calmly and palaly responded that   this account was not me and that I'd already  reported the account to Instagram to be taken   down and I apologized for the apparent disruption  to her day she responded that she didn't believe   me and said she pities me for having such low  self-esteem and would keep me in her prayers   I lost it at this point I called her stupid for  falling for an account that was so obviously fake   and said that her husband was such a blatant creep  it was embarrassing she even married him I sent   screenshots of the months of DMS from him that I  never responded to and concluded by saying if your   marriage is so easily threatened get a divorce  don't take your insecurities out on me shortly   after I got an angry phone call from my mom and  my grandma saying my cousin made an honest mistake   and that my response was cruel and unjustified  apparently my cousin showed everyone our messages   and is humiliated by what I said my mom's worried  our relationship with that side of the family is   permanently damaged and now I may or may not be  welcome at Future family gatherings because my   grandma doesn't want the drama I really don't feel  like my response was out of line but since no one   else agrees with me I'm not sure so am I the jerk  I think obese definitely not the jerk and not out   of line here frankly let's put it down to what  it is this person saying I don't believe you I'll   keep you in my prayers is such a like screw you in  everything you said that I think it's probably the   most normal rational human reaction to say okay  fine if that's how it is let's just lay all the   cards on the table and get it out there because  you'll be darned if you're the reason that their   marriage gets so easily threatened when you didn't  even do anything literally didn't even do anything   our next story is from RS of LD am I the jerk for  complimenting My Girlfriend by saying that she's   a smart girl I was trying to assemble a desk I  bought for like two hours without success even   after watching videos and reading the instructions  multiple times so I called my girlfriend for help   and she figured where I was messing up in just a  few minutes I know it sounds weird but honestly   I was amazed seeing her trying to figure it and  succeeding in a short amount of time so I told   her that she's such an amazing and smart girl she  got up and gave me an upset look when I asked her   what's wrong she angrily said to never call her  a girl again even as a compliment mind you I'm   not a native speaker so I didn't think there was  anything wrong with it I've heard people refer   to young women as girls and even my girlfriend  did that multiple times there's this girl in my   class I know this girl who blah blah blah I tried  to apologize and told her that she was an amazing   and smart woman but still she didn't accept  my apology and said that my compliment wasn't   genuine anymore I think op's not the jerk here  and honestly I hate that line of thinking where   because you stepped on a landmine that you didn't  know was there all of a sudden your compliment   doesn't mean anything and it's not genuine so it  doesn't count I don't think there's anything wrong   with her notion of not being comfortable or being  happy being called girl but I don't think it's   ever Justified to flip out at somebody who very  honestly didn't even mean to put them down and   wasn't even saying anything that was meant to be a  put down she might feel it's condescending but you   never meant it to be if anything I feel like they  should have said thank you I appreciate that but   also I don't really like the term girl and both  sides I think would have been more than happy our   next story is from three throw five w six away am  I the jerk for refusing my wife water I know the   title sounds bad but hear me out my wife 29 year  old female had a strange preference in water she   always drinks unflavored seltzer water but instead  of just drinking it normally she opens the can   first and then waits for all the bubbles to Fizz  out before drinking any of them it's just such a   waste since she's essentially drinking regular  water at this point but for such a higher price   my wife always argues that it just tastes fresher  and crisper after being left out opened I normally   do the grocery shopping and last week when I went  I did not buy any Seltzer when I got home my wife   asked for the Seltzer was she'd added it to the  shopping list when I explained that I hadn't   bought any she immediately went red in the face  but didn't really say anything later that day I   went to the gym and when I got back our kitchen  was decked out with Seltzer cans I could barely   open the pantry because there were so many packs  of Seltzer there were at least 25 boxes worth my   wife smugly told me that she had taken several  trips to the grocery store because one trip wasn't   enough to fit all the Seltzer in her car now that  she knew I was trying to cut her off she told her   family about this and they're all calling me a  jerk saying I'm depriving my wife of a basic need   I'm gonna say both sides are jerks here and this  seems like a very unhealthy relationship I think   just about everybody has their own personal quirks  as far as what they like to eat or drink I can't   say I tried her technique it might taste different  but the fact of the matter is she really likes it   it's literally her preference so for you to go and  say oh that's a waste I'm not buying that unless   it's literally breaking the bank I think that  alone is a huge jerk move and very controlling   and very unhealthy now for her to go out and just  blast the pantry full of cans that's also a jerk   move and a bit overreactive and a bit unhealthy  and overall I think there just needs to be some   kind of Common Ground communication discussed  here the snack story is from content profession   63 am I the jerk for refusing to buy my fiance a  gaming laptop for a few grand after he told me to   find a real job my fiance male 37 and I female  30 have started living together six months ago   I own a house and he moved in with me I run an  online business from home which allows me to   live rather comfortably a month after moving in  he quit his job saying how much he hated it and   that he's going to try and do Twitch streaming for  a living I'm all for following your passion so I   was supportive although surprised at the turn of  events I'm in a financial position to support us   both but it felt off anyway nothing happened with  his twitch Channel sure he's gaming all day but   hasn't bothered to even try and create an account  he just games for pleasure it's been seven months   I've had conversations with him suggesting he  finds work but he keeps telling me that I'm   unsupportive and he needs time he wanted us to buy  a bigger house together but I said that I'm fine   with my current one and that since he doesn't have  a job I don't want to get a mortgage and be left   with paying everything and he told me if I found a  real job maybe I wouldn't have financial problems   we had a massive argument that night now he's  been hinting at needing a new gaming laptop which   costs a few grand and I've been ignoring it so he  asked out right for me to buy it for his birthday   I told him no that my fake job doesn't cover new  laptops and he got really pissed at me telling me   I'm selfish and ruining his career granted I can't  afford to buy it but he really heard me saying my   business is not a real job despite me working my  butt off am I the jerk for not buying him a new   laptop I think Ops not the jerk here and I think  this guy is just doing the run around I mean this   guy has not put any time into trying to create  a road map for improving their streaming setup a   good gaming laptop's great but they haven't talked  about you know a webcam a microphone maybe a green   screen if they haven't even created a channel  that's like the bare minimum you know like what   I also really love the idea of doing gaming  streaming but man is it such a hard thing to   actually like dive into to me there's something  about game streaming where it's like if I don't   do it at least three plus times a week for a good  amount of hours at a consistent time in the week   like basically make it a consistent part-time or  maybe even full-time if you go full on in job it   feels like it would be pretty hard to cultivate an  audience otherwise honestly I think if op sticks   around with this guy they gotta start setting  some like actual metrics it shouldn't be op's   job to be babysit them but like they should have  a channel they should actually have streamed for   x amount of hours they should actually have  gotten you know a follower like let's start   seeing some actual progress from this guy before  you go buy him a gaming laptop this next story is   from catgirl349 am I the jerk for telling my dad  he needs to control his other daughters better   or I'll move in with another family member so I  female 15 have been living with my dad male 36   full time after my mom passed away almost a year  ago he's married to my stepmom female 34 and has   two daughters with her female eight my little  sisters are the classic little sisters who want   to be like their big sister they're also very nosy  and constantly touching stuff in my room it can be   pretty annoying yesterday I was at my grandparents  on my mom's side for most of the day I came home   to see a snow globe broken on the floor in my  room context all my snow globes are on the top   shelf of my bookshelf which I can reach but not  without a chair to make sure I'm careful and not   break anything so two eight-year-olds can't reach  it properly I noticed it was one of my mom's snow   globes that she had had since high school and  gave to me when I was a kid I almost started   crying when I saw it broke I ran downstairs to my  dad and stepmom asking why one of my snow globes   was broken on the ground in my room my sisters  admitted to climbing the bookshelf trying to play   with my snow globes I was so upset I lost it and  told my dad and stepmom they need to teach them   to not mess with my things my stepmom tried saying  it's just a snow globe and I need to relax I told   her it was one of my moms from when she was young  and that her daughter should have waited until I   got home I would have gladly have gotten my snow  globes for them to play with for a little bit but   instead they had to be impatient and now one that  was very special to me is broken my dad said was   down I then said Dad honestly I'm very tired of  them constantly messing with my stuff they know   not to do this but they still do it I've been  very patient but if this keeps happening I might   have to move in with my grandparents or something  before my dad could say anything my stepmom said   I'm taking things too far and I'm acting like  a brat my dad later apologized and said he'll   try to work on having the girls go in my room and  mess with his stuff whenever they please I could   tell he was upset by what I said my stepmom keeps  acting like I'm the bad person in the situation   I don't want stuff like this to keep happening  otherwise I would rather want to leave with my   grandparents so am I the jerk I think gopi's not  the jerk everybody deserves the right for their   stuff to be respected and honestly I feel bad  for op and I feel bad for the dad because I'm   not gonna lie it seems like the Stepmom is a very  controlling very bold very Brash very opinionated   and biased somebody at some point needs to hold  the kids accountable or else they're going to to   just grow up totally spoiled and totally rotten  if they're not already there they're probably   reaching the point of no return our next story is  from snoot am I the jerk for having a vegetarian   menu at my wedding me 30 year old female and my  partner 30 year old male are getting married next   September and are in the early stages of planning  we've been vegetarian for a while now and would   like to incorporate this into our days so we  can eat everything on offer we met with Caterers   yesterday and created a menu that includes loads  of delicious food that we love and will enjoy   nothing unusual and have two choices for each  course my family especially seems outraged at the   prospect of no meat being included and are arguing  that we need to think about what our guests want   I feel like I've lived on sides at restaurants  many times and I should be allowed to have one   day where I can eat food I enjoy and others can  too I've said that people can have a bacon sarni   before the wedding if it's that big of a deal and  it won't harm anyone to go for one meal without   meat I feel like I'm going to be arguing about  this with my family for the next 12 months am I   the jerk I think op is not the jerk here I think  everybody has the right to have a wedding that   they see fit and in my opinion all these people  that are showing up should just be grateful that   they're getting served food and honestly it does  annoy me that they're so close-minded that they're   not even willing to entertain the idea of eating a  vegetarian course I'm personally not a vegetarian   I do eat a lot of meat but I would love to take  a try at this vegetarian menu at this wedding I   see no issue with that they're probably just upset  because their only concept of vegetarian is wilted   lettuce and broccoli with a dollop of blue cheese  dressing our next story is from throwaway little   boy 22 am I the jerk for calling an intern at  my husband's work a little boy I'm a 32 year   old female my husband 38 year old male is high  enough in the company that he works at that he   has his own secretary and staff it's common for  me to show up at the office to drop stuff off or   go get lunch with him recently I've noticed a  new intern Jack 22 year old male I personally   think he doesn't like me but that didn't bother  me until today I went to go drop off some papers   for my husband today it was supposed to be a quick  in and out I have his schedule so I knew he wasn't   in a meeting or anything in fact it was his hour  lunch break so I go up to the secretary desk and   Jack sitting there no big deal I bet he was being  trained or just covering for today I tell him I   have some papers to drop off that he left at home  Jack looks at me and says he can take them I tell   him I have to give them to my husband personally  since they're important he tells me no I give him   a look and say it's his lunch break he's not busy  Jack then tells me to sit down girl I was shocked   and asked what he said same thing sit down girl  my temper is thin at this point and I called him   a little boy boy that thinks he has power since  he's sitting at the front desk when he isn't even   a full-time employee he looked shocked and got all  red I then go in the back knock on the office door   and there my husband is doing nothing I leave and  Jack wasn't looking at me I told the story to my   friend and she told me he was just doing his job  and I was a jerk so am I the jerk I don't want   to bring it up to my husband he can get protective  at times I think Ops definitely not the jerk and I   sure hope Jack was being trained because they did  an awful job what person working a front desk or a   secretary desk says sit down girl this isn't some  child walking up to their angry principal's desk   Jack seems super full of himself our next story  is from divide and conqueror am I the jerk for   not making my kids do chores with my stepdaughter  when my wife and I got engaged we agreed we needed   consistent rules for our household for all three  kids my 11 year old female and six-year-old male   and her 9 year old female we each changed some  of our rules to create a fair compromise most   of my rules were stricter than hers so many of my  rules got chucked and some stuff was added to hers   we were in full agreement when we all moved in  together one rule it was hard for my stepdaughter   to adjust to was chores my kids have been doing  them most of their lives they cleaned their own   rooms and worked together to clean their shared  bathroom they helped cook dinner and they each   have one night a week where they have to sweep  and take out the trash my kids complained to   me that stepdaughter hates cleaning the bathroom  and always cleans really slow forcing my kids to   either do most of the work or be in there forever  I decided that was unfair I told my daughter she   was responsible for cleaning the toilet in top my  son's responsible for the floor stepdaughter has   to do the sink and mirror once they finish their  tasks they can leave even if she isn't done since   stepdaughter is a procrastinator often they're  done before she even begins they'll rush in clean   and and then rush out to do their rooms while  she takes her time putting her shoes away and   unpacking her book bag often they're completely  done with their chores by the time she's finished   one stepdaughter is really upset with this she  says it's unfair last night she started bawling   because she didn't finish her chores and got no  dessert the agreed upon consequence my wife says   we're being unfair and I should make the kids go  back to cleaning the bathroom together so they   can teach her and she can improve but she knows  how to wipe down a sink Basin in a mirror she   just doesn't want to I feel like forcing the kids  to work together punishes my kids needlessly am I   the jerk I think gopi's not the jerk here I think  it's pretty clear that op stepdaughter is just not   used to doing the chores they're not hustling  they're not motivated probably when wiping the   mirror circling around slowly slowly wiping the  sink off and let's be real how many kids does   it take to clean a mirror in a sink to Force  those kids to stick around is just making them   essentially sit there and play moral support and  honestly that's just not fair to anybody else that   went in there hustled and got their stuff done I  think you just keep going with these chores and   at some point they'll learn to just get in get  it done and you'll be happy in fact them crying   about it like this and you giving in any kind of  concession like forcing the kids to stick around I   think that only stands to encourage them to act  out more and complain more this next story is   from Just a Nobody zero eight zero am I the jerk  for dropping my sibling off in my mom's date for   my whole life I 20 always have been the live-in  babysitter for my mom I thought that once I moved   out I would no longer have to babysit my sibling  6 8 and 10 anymore but boy was I wrong as soon   as I turned 18 I had gotten married and moved  out I know you all are gonna judge me for that   but I'm happy with my husband my husband doesn't  mind having my younger siblings over as he loves   children but it's gotten absolutely ridiculous  my mom doesn't even ask me before she drops off   my siblings she'll literally just drop my siblings  off at my door and leave she's even done it at our   date nights it's unfair to me and my husband  even though my husband's been accepting this   with Grace and is really good with my siblings I'm  actually pregnant myself and have been feeling the   typical pregnancy symptoms so my husband's been  picking up more of the load of watching them when   they are over I've told my mom many times to stop  doing this as my husband and I have a life of our   own and don't want to be watching your children  all the time and to at least let us know before   dropping them off recently my mom did this again  and I wasn't having it I called my mom after she   dropped my siblings off and found out where she  went which was on a date at a restaurant and went   there with my siblings I found where my mom was  seated went up to her with my siblings following   me and said hey Mom I have a few errands to run  so I decided to drop them off with you and left   while my mom was in the middle of objecting my  mom was pissed and ringed my phone down I didn't   answer until the next day when I did I got an  earful with her telling me that she raised me   and went through months of pregnancy the least I  could do is watch my siblings when she needs time   off I told her that she didn't even ask me to  watch them and that I can't accept her dropping   them off at my place without even asking me if  I'm even available to watch them she said that   we're family and that I'm supposed to look after  them because I'm their older sister and that I   embarrassed her in front of a guy that she really  liked my husband does feel bad at what I did and   feels like there were better ways to deal with my  mom than the way I did do you all think I was in   the wrong here I definitely think Opie was not in  the wrong here I honestly am very surprised that   Opie and her husband have been this accepting  of this for so long maybe it's because Ops just   kind of grown up with it so they're really used to  that kind of a situation but like having moved out   married pregnant having your own life I'm sorry  but I would be livid if my parents kept dropping   off my six eight and ten year old siblings  willy-nilly whenever they wanted without any   kind of warning ahead of time too shoot I think  I'd feel the same way even if it was just one   dog that they were dropping off every once in a  while and dogs are way easier to take care of than   six eight and ten year old kids and I adore dogs  our next story is from New You 2054 am I the jerk   for telling my boyfriend to stop moaning and stop  being a baby when he kept complaining about being   handed a baby to entertain at my brother's house  boyfriend and I are both 18. I was going to see my   brother to talk to him about some family stuff my  boyfriend was with me so he came along my brother   and sister-in-law just had triplets and they also  have an 18 month old so four babies in the house   they need all the help they can get once I went  to talk to my brother apparently my sister-in-law   handed one of the babies over to my boyfriend told  him to keep walking with her in his arms until she   falls asleep my boyfriend did that but when we  went back he kept on complaining about the fact   that my sister-in-law didn't ask him to do it she  assumed it and just put him in a position which   he couldn't refuse he could always refuse but  he considered it to be rude so he didn't refuse   I told him whatever don't come again then and he  accused me of dismissing his feelings and concerns   I told him that a few unexpectedly visit a family  with four babies you can't expect hospitality and   you're gonna have to help entertain a baby that's  life he said I'm being dismissive about it I told   him to stop moaning and stop being a child he  accused me of being a jerk I'm gonna be honest I   think op is a jerk and if I was in the boyfriend's  shoes here I would feel pretty disheartened I   think op needs to identify that boyfriend is  kind of venting about how they're feeling and if   you're being honest about something and saying oh  this kind of frustrated me when they just handed   their baby off and all you get in reply is oh  stop moaning don't come again then how are you   supposed to feel Opie's obviously got that just  get over it mindset but the boyfriend's looking   for a bit of reassurance and I think Gopi could  have even have communicated how they feel without   being blunt and a total jerk about it op very  easily could have said something like I'm sorry   if I want to go over there again you don't have to  come along and maybe something like just try and   kick back and relax now this next story is from  swimming exchange448 am I the jerk for calling   out my sister for breastfeeding at my wedding I'm  34 year old male my sister gave birth two months   ago she brought the baby to mine and my wife's 23  year old female's wedding she breastfeeds wherever   she goes we visit her house she'll breastfeed in  front of us visiting our parents she'll breastfeed   going out in a public setting she'll sit on a  bench on the park and breastfeed go out to a   restaurant she breastfeeds everywhere I've never  spoken about it because I know she'll get mad and   offended but when she did that on my wedding  I lost my cool during the reception dinner she   just did it again I kindly approached her and  asked her why she didn't bring formula or at   least bump milk out and put it in the bottle so  she wouldn't have to do all this at that moment   she said because I have to I feel comfortable  breastfeeding getting milk out on my own is more   painful I said she could just make this sacrifice  and compromise for one day instead of doing this   in front of 250 guests on my wedding she then  said she can't do much about it now because the   baby has to have her milk I told her she should be  more thoughtful of that then instead of completely   embarrassing herself and Us by doing this I told  my wife what the deal was and she said I'm a jerk   and should immediately apologize to my sister my  parents also decided with my sister and now pretty   much everyone thinks I'm a jerk since I'm the only  person who had a problem with it the only reason I   decided to call her out is because I considered it  a bad etiquette and tacky to do that at a formal   event and that she could have just found another  solution for that night am I the jerk I think op   is unequivocally The Jerk here there is literally  no more natural a process than breastfeeding and I   think it's a very specifically personal thing for  people to be upset about a mother breastfeeding   their kid especially if they're courteous enough  to cover up while it's happening by the way if   you're enjoying these stories make sure to hit  those like And subscribe buttons down below so   you never miss any of my daily videos every single  video has awesome stories like our next story from   fun calligrapher 330 am I the jerk for defending  my fiance when my sister yelled at her for wearing   perfume around her infant baby my sister has  an attitude that everyone should cater to her   the entire time she doesn't know what boundaries  mean and just ignores any complaint we'll make   regarding her behavior whenever she visits me  and my fiance or our parents she'll just dump   her kids to everyone else and sit around with  no responsibility one time she was mad that my   fiance couldn't babysit for her kids because my  sister wanted to go to a bachelorette party but   it was also my fiance's birthday so she of course  didn't want to stay inside watching someone else's   kids on her birthday now my sister gave birth  to another baby the baby's a month and a half   old on Saturday we had to attend my cousin's  wedding my fiance wore her usual perfume at   the reception my sister tried to dump the baby  on my fiance again but she didn't do so because   she smelled my fiance's perfume she then got mad  that my fiance wore perfume and said something   like you knew you'd be around a baby and you're  wearing heavy perfume like that my fiance told her   it's a wedding she's allowed to wear perfume  she then noticed that my fiance also has a   body glitter lotion on and my sister got even more  mad she called my fiance insensitive for wearing   perfume and body glitter knowing she'd have to  interact with the baby at some point I told my   sister that maybe she should stop trying to dump  her kids onto other people in this case my fiance   and if other people sense in lotions bother her  so much she should care for her own kids for once   my parents called me insensitive for saying that  to my sister and how being a mom's not easy and   I was really hard on her they also said that I'm  the jerk for defending my fiance like that just   for wearing perfume and lotion and how it's not  that difficult to skip perfume and lotion so you   can help someone else when they need to and they  call this disrespectful to my sister's needs and   the baby our next story is from no tart 7855 am I  the jerk for giving my wedding photographer a bad   review I got married two months ago was a moderate  Affair open bar nice dress no kids at a slightly   more upscale a place that I would have liked but  I guess you only live once we hired a photographer   through a company a mid-sized place that assigned  you an employee we met with her a few times to go   over expectations venues Etc no red flags nothing  weird day of the wedding she shows up in a sheer   white blouse with lace completely see-through  with no bra I noticed my husband noticed everyone   noticed I and most of my guests just spent the  evening trying to look away all through the   reception I could overhear people talking about  it or joking about it my husband and I had a   good laugh about it after everything was done just  sort of a what the freak was that did that really   happen I guess every wedding needs a weird story  at least mine didn't involve a guest a couple of   weeks ago we got the photo package it was good  and in line with what we paid for two days later   I get one of those automatic emails for a survey  asking how they did overall I rated them well and   even rated the photographer for well except for  the professional category I gave a 3 out of 5   in the box and filled in that I felt her clothing  could be more professional a manager called me for   more clarity I explained the outfit and said it  wasn't a big deal but wasn't really situationally   appropriate the manager didn't say much but  sounded serious and thanked me for informing   them end of story right well nope on the weekend  the photographer girl shows up drunk on my lawn   wearing three bras and started screaming at my  house long story short she was let go from her job   and felt that I was the jerk to blame eventually  we had to call the police to have her removed   people I know are torn something it was funny and  I should let it go others think it deserved to   be called out am I the jerk I think op's not  the jerk here because the bottom line is the   survey is asking for how Opie felt not only did  they wear something that was weirdly see-through   but it was also a white blouse like from start  to finish their whole outfit showed a complete   lack of respect for what kind of venue it was and  for the people they're taking photos for it's not   op's fault that them sharing their legitimately  not so great experience got this person fired   our next story is from psychological ebb 941 am I  the jerker for telling a lady on the bus to shut   up today I went out with some friends there was  35 degrees Celsius 95 degrees Fahrenheit outside   I hate any temperature that goes above 30 I got  on the bus and at the next stop a lady sat down   next to me even though there were plenty of other  seats empty without anyone next to you so that got   me a little annoyed but okay after five minutes  she receives a phone call and doesn't bother to   speak somewhat silently pretty sure everyone on  the bus heard her I was getting pretty pissed but   I put on my headphone when she finishes the phone  call she tries to talk to me I ignore her but she   keeps going and eventually she pokes me and at  that point I was mad I take off my headphones   say lady you've been talking Non-Stop and I'm  pretty sick and tired of this so would you do me   the favor of shutting the freak up she then tells  me I'm an uneducated jerk and gets off at the next   station so Reddit am I the jerk I think Ops not  the jerk maybe they could have said something   about they just don't want to talk but to me I  think there's no expectation to ever do that and   she should have gotten the memo when she had to  go and poke them for Opie to even acknowledge her   I'm not gonna lie if I was an OP situation and I  sat down by the window and it was also as hot as   it was outside and somebody chooses to ignore all  the open seats and plops down next to me you know   putting their human generator heat right next to  me I would be silently fuming if anything saying   that to her and then her immediately getting off  the bus to the next stop was like Mission success   to me our next story is from disaster daughter  am I the jerk for not opening the door for the   cops when I was babysitting I'm a college student  making some extra money babysitting this summer I   was staying at this family's house in a different  neighborhood I wasn't familiar with but their   four-year-old and six-year-old for an evening I  was getting them ready for bed and I heard shots I   told the kids that it must be fireworks I just got  them in bed on the side of the house that wasn't   near the street and sat quietly in their room for  a bit until they were asleep I heard some knocking   on the door and I didn't move even when the guy  called out that it was the police and wanted to   talk now to some of y'all that might seem weird  especially if you have police forces that are   trustworthy but I grew up in a country where the  police were outwardly aggressive and dangerous   to bring around calling the police on any kind of  crime against a woman was a sure-fire way to get   a second crime done that night so I was taught  early by my mom to never call police just go to   sleep if they come around you didn't see or hear  crap you were sleeping my family moved to America   when I was 13 and learned that while the police in  our area pretend like there's a more formal safe   organization they're no different than the ones  back home even worse because at least at home   everyone knows they're corrupt and won't tell them  anything or help them with anything but here some   people believe the air of respectability they put  on and Aid them it's a rougher area I'm living in   and I can say for certain that I've never seen a  cop protect or serve the community so for me it   was the most obvious thing ever that you don't  come to the door if the cops knock like that's   just generally accepted in the places I've lived  as the stupidest crap you can do I found out when   the parents came home that that's not Universal  they live in a rich neighborhood and I guess they   do actually feel protected and safe with their  police but I didn't know that so when the mom   came in and asked what was going on on the street  I said I don't know I didn't see anything she said   I must have noticed all the sirens and lights  and I said yeah I saw there were cops around   one knocked I don't know what it's about she asked  me what he had to say and I said like it was the   most obvious thing in the world I don't know I  didn't come to the door she got angry and asked   why I wouldn't go see what was happening and talk  to the officer I was honestly incredulous to me it   was obvious I didn't explain myself well since  I was so incredulous and said why would I in a   what the heck are you thinking kind of tone she's  she said I should leave and that she didn't want   me watching her kids again I had to argue with her  just to get paid but she eventually did but tipped   like crap am I the jerk for not opening the door  and not asking questions when I was babysitting   and the police came around I think personally  that op isn't the jerk here and then go be   scared in that moment as far as op's concerned and  everywhere Ops been they believe that they cannot   trust the police whatsoever so imagine you're in  this house with this four and six year old kid   Somebody's knocking on that door and you believe  that no matter what the person on the other side   of that door you cannot trust whatsoever are you  ever actually going to go open that door I don't   think so this thing stories from affectionate  weight 385 am I the jerk for telling my former   brother-in-law that my sister's money for their  child is nothing to do with him I lost my sister   Mia to cancer 11 years ago she left behind her  son Kai who was four and her daughter Ella who   was three my sister was married to Luke but when  she became ill she had turned to me and the rest   of her family for help with her kids inheritance  she asked that we buy her out of her share of the   business our grandparents left us many years ago  so she could leave her kids money we did just that   and it allowed her to leave a sizable sum for both  kids it's enough to cover college for both and   leave them with money for something else or they  could buy a house each my sister just wanted them   to have something real that could be there for  them when she couldn't be she ended up leaving me   in charge of the accounts for the kids Luke met  his current wife two years after my sister died   and married her within six months and added five  more kids over the following three years they've   struggled over the years one of his step children  has physical health issues another is special   needs and requires a lot of therapies money's  often tight we've been made aware of this by   him over the years he didn't know about the money  until he actually read the letter my sister left   for him which informed him of the existence of the  money ever since he learned of it 18 months ago he   has been determined to get his hands on it he's  accused me of letting my nephew and niece starve   when I could have dipped into the account which  I can't and which I didn't they never starved he   said I was dividing his family and so on he told  me that the money needs to be split seven ways   that Mia was selfish to keep the money from his  reach so he couldn't use it on all his kids that   it was selfish of her to come between his family  after she died since he'd been a loyal husband   to her one of his step-children ended up missing  out on an opportunity due to a lack of money you   try to get my niece and nephew to ask me for money  for their step sibling to do it but the kid said   in front of them that they wanted to keep the  money in the account which angered him he told   me that I didn't have the right to do this that  his kids money should be accessible by him their   father I told him that the money my sister left  for their children isn't nothing to do with him   that my my sister made it so and he needed to act  like it doesn't exist since it doesn't for anyone   but my nephew and niece let's just say he wasn't  happy am I the jerk for what I said money and   especially inheritance money just brings out the  worst in people I think Opie's not the jerk and   it's pretty clear that this guy sees a wealth of  money sitting in account and feels like they might   be able to get their fingers all over that try  to will their way into somehow being owed these   thousands of dollars they can try as they might  but if it was set up properly there's no way they   can get their hands on that money it's also crazy  to think that his new kids with his new wife would   ever somehow be connected to being owed any of  that money our next story is from dice's 1433   am I the jerk for refusing to let my boyfriend  have my bank account info to make a purchase I   female 31 have been with my boyfriend male 37 for  eight months he has three kids and is a single dad   we're on pretty good terms regarding almost  everything when it comes to money and spending   we take turns to invite each other out weekly we  don't live together obviously several times he's   had me pay for his kids purchases I didn't make a  big issue out of it for the sole reason that those   purchases were relatively small all I had to pay  was 30 to 60 dollars the other day he called me   while I was at work and sounded like he was in a  hurry he said he just found the gaming device he's   been looking for for so long and wanted to buy  it for his oldest son I asked what this has to   do with me and he told me he was short on money  and needed three hundred dollars he asked me to   lend him the 300 and I hesitated but agreed  he asked for my bank account info so he could   pull the money but I refused and told him to wait  for me till I got there he insisted and said he'd   handle it all I had to do was send him my bank  account info after I end the call with him his   insistence made me uncomfortable so I still said  know and told them to either wait or I won't pay   he got mad at me saying he didn't get why I was  acting like this he got so loud I had to hang up I   found him sitting outside after I went home he was  waiting for me and was extremely upset he asked   why I didn't just send him the account info so  he could pull the money we agreed on I told him I   just don't feel comfortable letting anyone have my  personal info especially when it comes to finances   he got offended and said I'm not just anyone I'm  your freaking partner then went on a rant about   how he ended up not paying the gaming device after  looking for it for so long and now his kids mad at   him and it's my fault we had a fight then he left  and told me I'd better have an apology for him and   his son the next time I call his phone I haven't  called yet but I feel like I acted stupidly   interrationally I think I should have just given  him the info he asked for I don't know if it made   the right decision I think op is dead definitely  not the jerk here and it's kind of sad to see that   in the end op starting to lean towards feeling  self-conscious and if they were a jerk giving up   your bank info is a very serious thing and not  something you should just throw around because   it's not like a credit card you know if there's  a false charge or something you didn't approve   on a credit card done you can reverse that and  get your money back if it's in your bank account   it gets a little bit harder our next story is  from perfectly worthless 99 am I the jerk for   warning my friend that the guy she's dating has a  fetish for Asian chicks I have these two friends   who recently started dating Mark and Alexis Mark  is a wide guy and Alexis is Korean I'm black but   that's not really relevant I'm in separate friend  groups with both of them and my group with Mark   it's mostly guys so we of course speak differently  one of the things the group gives Mark crap for is   that he has a thing for Asian chicks but it's  mostly Japanese culture it's the kind of thing   we joke him about but it's actually very weird he  said multiple times that he wants to go to Japan   and find himself a traditional Japanese wife  he has hiragana tattoos is obsessed with Karen   fukahara is just really into crap like that when  he told us that he was dating a new girl I assumed   it would be an Asian girl but I didn't know it  would be Alexis because I'm also close with Alexis   I felt like it would be a good move to at least  warn her I feel that a small mistake I made was   warning her kind of publicly I'll admit fault  there but the topic of Mark was up and I just   kind of said it I said I'd be careful about him  because he has a certain thing for Asian girls I   told her that Mark was a good guy but he just has  a weird interest in Asian women she kind of wrote   it off to me but then apparently she told him  what I said he was pissed at me he said that what   I told her was incredibly inappropriate and that  I was just jealous that he's with her and I'm not   Alexis is also mad at me for trying to stick my  nose in her relationship and trying to embarrass   her in front of the rest of our friends I feel  like this is really unfair as I would appreciate   it if someone told me that a girl I was seeing  had a fetish for black men am I the jerk I don't   think you would be the jerk for warning somebody  over weird Behavior could it have been handled   better probably should it have been private again  probably but I don't think you could ever be the   jerk for giving a heads up to a friend about  somebody who they're seeing who you've already   seen some weird bothersome concerning or maybe  even just downright creepy behavior from this next   story is from National bid9571 am I the jerk for  telling my husband's ex-wife to get over herself   at her demands my stepdaughter have her own room  I'm a widow who from my previous marriage has two   daughters a 15 year old and a nine-year-old I  remarried two years ago to a divorcee who has   a 10 year old daughter after dating him for four  years we met through our younger girls both doing   swimming this isn't a case of me splitting him up  from his ex-wife as I know some will likely ask   that things with his ex-wife have been cordial the  so not particularly warm he moved into my house   and I converted my office into a bedroom for her  when she visited so she'd have her own room and   set up an office space in our bedroom instead my  daughters love their stepsister and treat her just   like another sister my youngest and her especially  get on as they're already friends I recently got   offered a promotion which would mean we need to  move to the city which is more expensive we'll   be selling the current home to fund this but based  on our current savings and the money we'd get from   the sale the only houses in our price range are  three bedrooms not ideal but we can make it work   the plan was for me and my husband to share one  room my oldest daughter to have her own room and   my youngest daughter to share a room with her  step-sister they'd also get one of the larger   rooms when his ex-wife was dropping her off we  filled her in on the plans and the properties we'd   been looking at to keep her up to date after all  her kid will be staying with us sometimes she has   a right to be kept informed of this matter but she  did not like the fact that her daughter would have   to share a room as she had never done that before  I try to assure her that it would be fine that the   girls got along well and they'd have a larger room  to prevent squabbling over space she was still not   happy about this and told me that if anything my  daughter should share and leave a room free for   her daughter I told her my teenage daughter wasn't  going to share a room with her little sister and   leave a room free for whenever my stepdaughter  came to stay that my daughters will be the one   living in the house full time so they need their  own space my husband added here that that wasn't   really a fair request and at least the two younger  are friends she insists we should get a mortgage   to pay for a bigger place of our savings and the  sale can't give us enough money to buy somewhere   big enough now this could be an option but neither  of us are keen on starting out with debt and I   personally feel that that is none of her business  we fought more until I finally told her to get   over herself that it wasn't like I was making  her daughter sleep on the couch or putting her   in with a much older kid or one that her daughter  couldn't stand that the younger kids it would be   just like a sleepover heck even with their own  rooms they sometimes do this maybe I'm the jerk   for snapping but I just reacted at her continual  pushing my husband understands why I did this but   says I maybe went too hard too fast I hate that I  may make things more awkward in the future through   this I think Ops not the jerk I think the solution  that they've got here seems to work pretty well I   think the kids get along well I think it seems  like they're gonna mesh well sharing a big room   together and frankly I don't think anybody enjoys  that constant pushing and bickering so I don't   really blame them for snapping and our final story  of the days from an anonymous poster am I the jerk   for refusing to pay for my husband's family to go  on vacation with us and then leaving without him   I'm a 45 year old female I share four beautiful  children 23 20 17 and 14 with my husband 49 year   old male we've been in together for nearly 30  years and married for 24. we always take a big   family vacation every summer due to covid that was  put on a Hiatus usually he pays for his parents   and vice versa together we pay for our children  one of his brothers needed help so my husband   decided to cover him and his family my husband  retired a couple years ago we've always had   separate accounts and a joint account he's always  been an avid Hunter and fisherman we're not rich   but we do live comfortably I managed our finances  to get us to this point now when he retired he   started managing his money because I didn't agree  with his irrational purchases he recently invested   a large portion of his savings into a large  hunting tract citing it was a steal that he   couldn't turn down mind you we live in a large  property where the hunting game is in abundance   I didn't understand the need to buy more acreage  maybe it's a hunting thing if there's any Hunters   on here please let me know I reminded him that our  trip was coming up and that he should have waited   to make the purchase since to cover his brother  and his family of six plus his parents would be   expensive he assured me that he had it covered I  come home to a pretty boat in our driveway I don't   know a thing about boats but all I saw was money  my husband receives a nice pension each month   but a percentage of it goes to her joint account  and the rest to his savings I calculated the land   and finally learning about the price of the boat I  knew he couldn't possibly have enough to cover the   trip which included our kids as well so I asked  him about how he was planning on paying he said   he had it covered time rolls around for us to book  everything he mentions that he noticed I had a   significant amount of money in my personal account  and was wondering if I could pay for the entire   trip and he would pay me back his half I told him  no he was aware of this trip and ignored it my   husband hates owing anybody and therefore he would  find a reason why he shouldn't have to pay me back   which is a con artist move to me I proposed these  sign an agreement to repay me with interest if he   didn't pay me back in a set amount of time we had  a huge argument about it and he ended up leaving   I called and texted no response I received nasty  texts from mother-in-law sister-in-law and his   sisters about how I was treating him therefore I  booked my family and I I was even kind enough to   purchase his ticket though I hadn't seen or heard  from him in over two weeks the moment we left for   vacation the harassing calls and texts started I  turned my phone off and enjoyed my vacation I came   home to a nasty letter in his wedding ring stating  that he wouldn't be returning until I apologized   to him and his family for how I treated them I'm  not apologizing but I am wondering am I wrong for   not paying and suggesting him paying me back am I  the jerk I think Opie is definitely not the jerk   and frankly I feel for op because it sounds to me  like at this point the long con for the husband   is to divorce them and try to take like half of  op's money that they still saved up although if   that were to happen I'm sure that would get  very messy very quickly because the value of   all that land they bought the value of that boat  they bought wherever they're living in if they   own a house all that stuff does come into play as  marital assets so I don't know as far as op goes   I feel like this is kind of a lose-lose situation  but I think they're not the jerk me and my sisters   were pregnant at the same time she was due in  March had hers April 10th I was due in May had   mine May 7th we talked about breastfeeding when  we were both pregnant and we agreed that we both   wanted to breastfeed for many reasons when she had  my niece she decided breastfeeding wasn't for her   and I supported her a hundred percent I had my son  and breastfeeding was the best option for me me   and my sister lived together and sometimes she'll  take the milk I freeze for my son at first I   didn't have a problem with it because I had plenty  of milk but she started going overboard with it   she'll take milk that I specifically say not to I  asked her if she wanted me to pump for her and she   said yes so I started doing that since I pumped so  much because I have to feed two babies I started   producing so much milk that I'm just so sore and  over filled I try to pump more but that just makes   me produce more and more I started pumping less  than just feeding him directly and my sister would   just come up and get my niece to latch on me as  well like she will literally take my other boob   out and put my niece on it at first I let her but  then it just started feeling like she thought I   was obligated to do it because when I didn't want  to she would get mad she tried to put my niece on   me earlier and I just told her that I didn't want  to breastfeed my niece anymore and she should stop   because at this point it's getting weird she got  mad and was like you know how badly I wanted to   breastfeed my niece and breast milk is so much  better for a baby if you loved her you would do   it yet again I told her no my sister chose not  not to breastfeed I chose to do it I shouldn't   have to always feed my niece every couple of hours  when I'm trying to give myself a break because my   thumb's on me most of the darn day I'm starting to  feel bad because I do want my knees to be healthy   but shoot she's a darn baby and she doesn't know  the difference between milk and formula she's   getting her nutrition anyways and she's a healthy  darn baby am I the jerk would you guys agree with   me that everything that went down on the story was  closer than most sisters ever need to have been   the sister actually going to do the physical act  of taking op out and getting the niece to latch   onto them like almost as if they're taking their  baby to the milk gas station and just pulling the   nozzle out I think Opie's not the jerk but this  is extremely weird right I'm not the odd one out   let me know in the comments our next stories from  relationship fine 8592 am I the jerk for making my   wife order off the kids menu or share a meal with  me my wife has never been a big eater that's why   and I don't have a problem with it what I do have  a problem with is that my wife is somehow also a   greedy eater she always prefers a large variety of  foods together at a time just in smaller portions   at home this is annoying but it's manageable when  we go out to eat though it becomes a nightmare she   will order whatever can get her the most variety  of options ignoring the cost she'll add sides   appetizers and desserts to her meal only to eat  one or two bites of each thing she orders maybe   this would be manageable if she ate leftovers but  she refuses to do so so all the food just ends up   going to waste most of the time I find myself  ordering small meals and eating what remains of   her orders just to try and justify it but I don't  like 90 of what she orders and just want to eat   my own darn meal a week ago I got incredibly  annoyed when she ordered herself a full rack   of ribs and an appetizer only to eat like 20 of  each I only ordered a salad so I I could finish   the rest off but I hated the sauces she chose for  the ribs and most of the appetizer went untouched   as we were leaving I told her that I'm sick of  spending 40 plus dollars on her alone for food   that she doesn't end up finishing I told her that  from now on she can either order two things off   the kids menu or we can work out something we both  will enjoy and share she ignored me and thought   I wasn't serious well last time we went out to  a wing place as we sat down I asked for a kids   menu and she got confused when we started talking  and I told her that she either needed to order off   the kids menu or share with me she got quiet and  refused to talk to me and started saying that I'm   insulting and belittling her we ended up going out  into the parking lot and having a fight before she   got an Uber home she's not talking to me now and  this morning I got a call from her dad screaming   at me for what I did I'm having second thoughts  now about this I think op is not the jerk I think   the wife just has an inability to deal with the  reality that they're being extremely wasteful with   food and not just food but money and also think  about all the other people that could have eaten   that food that they're just taking basically  nibbles off of and then dumping I think if you   went on a date and you saw this I think that  would be enough to upset just about anyone and   just because they don't want to deal with it and  they're offended and hurt that you find it to be a   problem which it is doesn't make op the jerk this  next story is from Jasmine T20 am I the jerk I   did a bridal photo shoot a week after my brother's  wedding which upset my sister-in-law I 25 year old   female am a hotel receptionist and I do modeling  on the side I did a bridal gown photo shoot three   weeks before my brother's wedding but the ad came  yesterday it was for a local Boutique which isn't   really big they have maybe two branches in our  region my brother Simon 30 got married last week   but they postponed their honeymoon because of  his job so when the ad came out yesterday my   sister-in-law Nancy 29 year old female saw it a  medium-sized LED screen in the shopping center I   also posted some photos on my Instagram account  she called me and asked why I have bridal photos   in the city center and I told her I got an offer  to model bridal gowns for this Boutique I then   asked her what she thought of my photos honestly  I was expecting feedback like you looked beautiful   or the gowns looked good on you but instead she  yelled at me on the phone and accused me of being   jealous of her I was surprised because Nancy and  I are really friendly with each other I didn't   expect her to blow up on me like that she hung up  on me and a few minutes later I got a call from   her sister who sounded really upset with me for  stealing her sister's Thunder I told her Nancy's   wedding was literally seven days ago so why are  they accusing me of stealing her Thunder we got   into a verbal altercation she called me names I  retaliated and called her names before I hung up   last night I saw a tick tock video about the whole  situation and a lot of Nancy's friends are siding   with her they said I was jealous of the Bride  that's why I did the photo shoot they're also   commenting nasty things in my Instagram so I had  to turn the comment section off I asked Simon to   talk to his wife but he wants nothing to do  with it am I missing something here because   quite frankly I don't understand why I'm a jerk  I think op is definitely not the jerk and I'm as   stunned as they are I don't understand what here  there is to be jealous about it's a modeling gig   it's not like op went and sought this work and  was like please let me model for you because I'm   so jealous the amount of insecurity on display  here is insane and frankly I would be very very   upset at Simon for not talking to their wife about  this because it is so clearly raging insecurity   literally none of it is op's Fault in any way by  the way if you're enjoying these stories make sure   to hit those like And subscribe buttons down  below so you never miss any of my daily videos   every single video has awesome stories like our  next one from appropriate air area 311 am I the   jerk for putting the truck in my name I'm female  20 and my fiance is male 23. we bought a 90s   car that needed some work he got it fixed and he  started driving me places in it when I would ask   or showed I wanted to drive it he got very upset  about it I never got to drive it but his friends   have we ended up splitting for a minute over it  I recently put a down payment on a 2022 Toyota   Tacoma double cab I went with my uncle to get it  and when I signed for it I put it in my name and   my uncle co-signed for it when I pulled in with  it he came outside smiling from ear to ear he   hugged me and thanked me for getting him his dream  truck I was trying to explain to him it was mine   but he'd already jumped into it he had then seen  the paperwork laying there and asked if he needed   to sign it before I could answer you read whose  name it was in he slowly got out and went in the   house he didn't speak to me for the rest of the  night while he was at work he texted me and said   it's really disrespectful that you got my dream  truck and didn't put it in my name I'll be staying   in my mom's tonight I didn't respond later  on he sent me a picture of a GMC asking if   it was pretty I said I didn't like GMC but if you  liked it it's pretty he said well doesn't matter   you got the Toyota so I just left him on red he  has yet to come home and I'm regretting getting   the truck so am I the jerk I think op's not the  jerk here now as far as everything goes I think   there's some pretty big red flags being shown  here I'm just saying op should think carefully   about where things are headed because to me the  fiance is acting like they're 13 not 23. our next   story is from flaky damage 3433 am I the jerk for  using a squirt bottle for cats on my nephew my   nephew Michael just finished a sophomore year and  is 15 years old due to circumstances that I would   rather not discuss on Reddit I am Michael's legal  guardian at the moment the only real issue I've   had with with Michael is the fight to get him out  of bed every morning on time for school I made him   set an alarm on his phone but he just about always  would turn it off and then sleep in I would try   putting ravioli my cat on his chest but Michael  would just swatter away I learned that my sister   would often times let Michael lay in until it was  11 then drop him off at school and lie that she   had car troubles so it would be an excused late  arrival it took me throwing off his blankets and   physically dragging him out of bed by his foot for  Michael to get up I was running late for work one   morning and Michael was refusing to get up again I  didn't have time to drag Michael out of bed and I   told him this Michael was not budging so I grabbed  a squirt bottle that I used to house train my cats   filled it in the sink and then squirted Michael  with it until he got up he got out of bed and   ran to the bathroom in under 30 seconds a huge  improvement from 10 minutes of playing tug of   war with Michael I started to use the spray bottle  every morning until he actually started using his   alarm and getting up on time I and Michael were  visiting my cousin Lucinda and Michael made a joke   like I don't want Uncle Sean to spray me again  listen to ask for elaboration then scolded me on   the way home saying that using the squirt bottle  was demeaning to Michael and that I'm treating   my nephew like an animal I don't see it that way  at all I simply can't drag him out of bed every   morning if we were both a decade younger it might  have been possible but Michael's 15 and he's a big   kid at that plus now he's getting up on his own  am I the jerk for using a squirt bottle for cats   on Michael I don't think Opie's The Jerk for  using the squirt bottle for cats I think if it   works that's great I think what's more important  is how op treats Michael literally every other   moment besides using that squirt bottle like if  op is supportive and loving and caring and does   what they can doesn't abuse or treat Michael bad  in any way besides hey if you don't get up out of   bed I'm gonna spray you with a squirtball bottle  I don't see the problem with it and it actually   turned out to be a productive thing it worked  and Michael was only joking about referring to   it so no harm no foul the snake story is from  throwaway 647-8467 am I the jerk for refusing   to make my husband another cup of coffee after  he purposely dropped the first one I'm female 26   my husband male 31 woke up not in the mood this  morning and told me to make him a cup of coffee   before he went to work I went and made it with  extra sugar just like how he always likes it but   when I handed it to him and he tasted it he made  a face and said it was too sweet I told him this   is how he usually has it but he said he wasn't in  a good mood today and told me to make another one   mind you I was already 20 minutes late for work I  told him no and that he already had one and should   just drink it next thing I knew he dropped the cup  on the floor purposely and said that he no longer   has it and I should go ahead and make another one  I refuse used and then we had an argument and I   just walked out he texted me a bunch later saying  I disrespected him and forced him to not have his   daily coffee by acting stubborn and having an  attitude then reminded me of how much work he's   picked and how much time and rest he sacrificed in  order to help me while I was recovering from the   birth of our son and that was just the first week  then I had to get up he said he say owed him and   that I should have returned at least one of his  many favors instead of deciding to ruin his day   I came home and he's here refusing to even look  at me am I the jerk should I have taken just five   minutes to make him another one I think Ops not  the jerk and to me this sounds like the kind of   thing that a marriage 30 years into the marriage  is experiencing where the husband's all grumpy and   angry at the world complaining about the littlest  things like oh you can't just do this one thing   for me depending on how the husband is I don't  know if you'll ever truly get through to them but   man sometimes you just want to tell these kinds  of people to just get over perpetuating the not   in the mood mornings you woke up and you decided  that you're not in the mood so you just choose to   be a a-hole to everybody because oh sorry Han I'm  having one of my a-hole mornings you're gonna just   have to deal with me being a total jerk because I  woke up that way and that's just how it's gonna be   there's no way I'll ever be able to change that  our next story is from Tia a mother baby three   am I the jerk for telling my mother she shouldn't  have brought her new baby in pregnancy at a family   dinner after my wife miscarried the title alone  might make me sound like a total jerk so here's   the context I'm 28 year old male happily married  to my wife Sarah 31. we've been together for over   six years and married for three years my mother  Laura 45 had me pretty early on she always wanted   a big family and has been together with my dad  since they were 14. after she had me she decided   to be a stay-at-home mother and in the space of  the next 10 years had a total of seven kids so I   have loads of siblings she's recently announced  that I'm to become a brother again me and Sarah   have been struggling to conceive for the past  three years we really would like to have a kid   together and considered surrogacy but my family  kind of talked us out saying we shouldn't trust   our child with some unknown woman I've suggested  that my mother or my sister become our surrogate   if they're that worried but both of them declined  saying that they can't have any more children and   won't be able to carry my sister has five kids  and just to note I love Sarah regardless if we   have a child or not and I'm willing to adopt  but she really wants us to have her own me and   Sarah have tried a lot of options and recently  unfortunately she had another miscarriage and   this was really upsetting and depressing for both  of us I've shown my support and my mother who knew   all about our struggles and reason miscarriage  invited us out for dinner at her house yesterday   which Sarah wanted to attend as she's in a very  good relationship with my mother my entire family   was there and the dinner was going well Sarah  congratulated my mother on her pregnancy and I   thought that will be it then my sister announced  that she's pregnant again and basically her and my   mother ended up having the baby talk really  loudly where my sister was excited to have   another brother and my mother wanted to have  another grandchild that was too much for Sarah   so she got up and left in tears and I followed  her shortly after she had to cut off her family   because they kept telling her she's not a woman  for not being able to have children and is too old   and this gets to her too much after we got home my  mother called me and said Sarah behaved yourself   very rudely and she's expecting an apology as it  ruined the dinner to celebrate life I got angry   and told her that she was completely out of line  and inconsiderate for having the baby talk with my   sister when she knew Sarah had another miscarriage  and her life celebration dinner made things a lot   worse for both Sarah and I I've also said that  if she told us what the dinner was we wouldn't   have come at the end I was called a jerk for  not appreciating another life being born am   I the jerk I was a little on the fence on this  one until the last couple of lines once it was   revealed that this was a life celebration dinner  her and that was never discussed or disclosed up   front to somebody who just recently miscarried  Ops definitely not the jerk and both the mom and   the sister were totally clueless in this just  totally out of touch our next story is from OK   struggle 3081 am I the jerk for threatening to  fire my fiance I 35 year old male and my fiance   25 year old female work at the same bar together  that's actually how he met was when she started   working there four years ago I asked her on a date  not long after and we've been together ever since   currently my fiance is 33 weeks pregnant while I  understand working and being on her feet is very   hard for her she's just really dropped the ball at  work ever since she found out that she's pregnant   she's been sleeping in showing up late missing  shifts trying to leave early giving away shifts   last minute and just having a bad attitude towards  work in general yes it's difficult for her to work   now and she gets tired easy easily but I really  don't think it excuses her behavior she's been   named in multiple negative reviews and it's been  brought up by the owners more than once over the   weekend she's been working during brunch and she  decided to leave early without being approved to   do so I had to come in to cover her because no  one else was available by the time I got there   multiple tables had walked out from waiting for  so long since we were under staff to begin with   I didn't get home until late since I was scheduled  to close anyways and I was Furious I slept on the   couch and when she tried to get me to come to bed  I sat her down and told her how she couldn't pull   something like that again or she would be fired  she obviously didn't like this and threw a fit   calling me names and crying about how she needs  this job she ended up going to her friend's house   for the night I know she's going through a lot  but I'm just tired of picking up the slack for   her at work so am I the jerk I think op is not  the jerk here but it's a very messy situation   the elephant in the room is maternity leave sucks  in the U.S in a lot of places so I'm assuming   that's not an option here the real problem is  being your fiance's supervisor like I think by   all metrics this person would have been fired a  long time ago for doing half of the stuff they did   here so as a supervisor I think GOP is completely  within their right to let a person that's working   that quality work go but man does it really put  some stress on that relationship what do you guys   think am I wrong here let me know in the comments  this next story is from throw ra 537477 am I the   jerk here for driving my daughter's home in the  middle of the vacation after they excluded their   stepsister I know this might sound ridiculous  but let me explain I 38 year old male have   two daughters Nora 16 and Lily 14 from my former  marriage I got married to my current wife who has   a daughter Jenna 11. Jenna has a disability she's  in a wheelchair before I met her mom her life was   pretty much inside the house she was homeschool  pulled up until they got her in a private school   but she still struggles with socializing due  to Growing Up isolated my wife didn't want   to but I pushed for Jenna to get therapy which I  hoped would help with her relationship with Nora   and Lily but the girls took their time to get to  know her yes they did exclude her from activities   but I had several sit Downs with them in hopes of  getting them to understand that Jenna is a normal   girl and has so much in common with them so they  shouldn't feel like she's difficult just because   of her disability I thought things were getting  better but days ago and while we were at a beach   resort for four days Jenna stayed with us while  the girls kept going out during our second day I   saw the girls getting ready to go get ice cream  I asked Jenna if she wanted to join them and she   said yes I asked them to take her with them and  they were unsure at first but then took her an   hour later my wife came to me saying that Jenna  Calder saying the girls left her near one of the   benches and told her to wait for five minutes  to the to get ice cream but didn't come back   we went there immediately found Jenna sitting  alone while the girls were eating ice cream and   hanging out at a different location I got so mad  at them especially after they admitted to leaving   her there I told them the vacation was over for  them and had them pack up their stuff and took   them home both of them were crying and pleading  in the car while my wife and Jenna waited at the   resort I dropped the girls off and had my mom  stay with them then I went back and resumed the   vacation both girls and their mom were all over me  about this and their mom went on a rant about me   favoring my stepdaughter over my biological ones  and being a doormat for my wife the girls were   upset but I explained why I did what I did their  mom defended them saying that I shouldn't force   them to care for their stepsister and expect them  to be her maids and stop their life for her it got   to my former in-laws who are now blaming me for  ruining the much awaited vacation for the girls   and acting irrationally my question is whether I  messed up and went too far with my reaction all   I wanted was for them to be upfront and honest  and not basically abandon her the way they did   I'm going to say everyone is kind of the jerk here  no doubt when they went to get ice cream and took   Jenna with them it is crazy of them to abandon  and kind of set Jenna off to the side while they   go eat ice cream elsewhere but let's be real here  they're both quite a bit older than Jenna Jenna's   11 years old and the other two are at 14 and  16. kids with that age Gap I think they already   don't often want to hang out with each other it's  also their stepsister and also with OP forcing it   like this the kids probably just feel like it's  a babysitting thing it's one thing to have them   all included in activities together but I'm not  sure the two older kids actually feel the same   way about it that all said that does not excuse  their actions with the ice cream event our next   story is from anxious sprinkles396. am I the jerk  for walking out of an interview when they would   would not disclose a salary to me I'm getting  mixed messages about this in a variety of opinions   last year I graduated with my degree in computer  science since then I worked on a contract for a   company that's been fairly okay but not one I plan  on trying to start a career with since my contract   ends in a month I've been looking for full-time  work the hardest part about this though is fitting   all the interviews in basically every application  I send in gets responded to along with a handful   of recruiters spamming my LinkedIn so I've decided  that if they don't tell me in the first 15 minutes   of the interview what they're actually paying I  will ask if they don't tell me in a plain terms   an actual range or number I'll thank them for  their time and leave most of the people I've   talked to will just answer the question but I've  noticed a few try to dance around it reply with   money isn't the most important part of a job or  some we're family and salary is an important BS   because of this out of about a dozen interviews  I've walked away from four this way to at least   justify this I'm already in talks with a company  and basically waiting to hear their offer so I   feel like if they're not going to give me a guess  of what I could expect at this point there's no   reason for me to deal with them well yesterday  evening I went up to meet with a local startup a   recruiter reached out to me and I fit every check  box they needed and had actually built a compiler   for the language they were primarily using python  so I was their number one candidate 15 minutes in   they had not talked at all about compensation so I  asked the interviewer told me that it's bad manner   to ask for a salary this early in the process I  just smiled and said that I disagree and that I   wasn't going to waste my time entertaining an  offer if they could not compete he tried to   argue back that they were a startup and yada yada  so I just did what I did before stood up thanked   him for his time and left well the recruiter  blew up my phone asking what what the freak I   did and who I thought I was apparently the owner  of the company was my interviewer I had no clue   first time I talked to the guy and he never even  mentioned that he was the owner and he blew up at   the recruiter for my behavior the recruiter made a  vague post on LinkedIn that was an attack against   me but didn't name me the comments swing from I'm  in the right to a total jerk I told my significant   other and they said that I was a jerk so am I the  jerk I personally feel that op is not the jerk   here as much as it is important to do things for  work that you love I don't think anybody's kidding   anybody if they try to say that it's not about  the money and frankly if you're putting yourself   out here you're putting your resume out there and  you're trying to get involved with these companies   you don't want to waste too much time and get  your hopes up not knowing how much they're even   offering to pay you and I don't think it's a crazy  assumption to assume that if they're not giving   you that information they're probably wanting  to pay you a pretty crap rate our next story is   from Kaio Kamikaze am I the jerk for making a real  life Pokedex of girls at my University so freshman   year of college I began working on this project  casually I like to keep notes on women I talk to   about their favorite things activities they enjoy  gifts and Candy they like sappy crap like that I   suck at remembering things like that so I decided  to keep a spreadsheet eventually after getting a   handful of entries I offhandedly mentioned it to  my friend group one had the idea that I shared   with them so we could all keep new entries as  they caught different entries so this expanded   further right now about 40 guys have access to it  and it's mainly the guys in my frat and the women   featured are girls from different sororities  we also added more information such as like   where you should take them if you really want to  impress them we don't keep this information for   any nefarious or scum baggy reasons just to help  us know what to do if we want to impress certain   girls like the original idea of this was to just  keep information like favorite color so I don't   forget their favorite colors now it's helping a  lot of guys somehow a girl who was on the list   found out and she was pissed the Freak off she  was eventually able to trace it back to me so   I assume someone who was simping for her snitched  when the Pokedex wasn't making the girl like him   so she's pissed off and she made it out to be  a guide to hooking up with women one it's most   definitely not that it's just to make impressing  them on dates easier that's it she's made a big   deal of this telling so many girls around campus  and now they're all saying that by the start of   the fall semester none of them will be visiting  our fraternity or going to our parties now all the   guys are mad at me when I'm not even the one who  told the girls about the list and they were also   all using the list I think it's unfair to say  that the list was all about sex when it wasn't   at all am I the jerk I think op is more than a  jerk this is one of the creepiest things I've   heard about it's one thing if you're in a  relationship with somebody to write down notes   like that but let's be real Pokedex is a very  cutesy name of saying database of women attending   this college and all their favorite things so you  can get in good with them and as much as op says   that it's not for nefarious or scumbaggy reasons  I highly sincerely and wholeheartedly doubt that   all 40 plus guys that were using this database  were not using it for scumbaggy reasons op can   say all that they want that they never use it for  sex but let's be real every other guy that had   access to this probably was and everything I've  said doesn't even touch on the whole creepiness   factor of having this database anyways would  anybody have ever have wanted in the first   place to be on this weird Pokedex database of  Favorite Things list it is frankly creepy and   disgusting and I don't blame any of those girls  for avoiding all of them and our final story of   the day is from throwaway bf's cousin am I the  jerk for what I said to my bf's cousin when he   said I'm a gold digger I'm female 23 my boyfriend  Kyle male 31 is from a very wealthy family I went   no contact with my family a few years ago so I  didn't have much financial help these past few   years and I'm still struggling with money but  I have a good job and hopefully things will get   better soon but right now Kyle helps me a lot  and I really appreciate it when Kyle introduced   me to his family some of them were extremely nice  especially his parents but some don't like me and   think I'm a gold digger one of them is his cousin  Matt male 33 he's been making rude comments about   us from the first day that we met last night I was  invited to one of their family gatherings Matt was   also there he made some comments about how Kyle  only got a younger girlfriend because he's rich   and I'm after his money usually I don't answer  because I don't want to cause drama but this time   I couldn't stop myself so I told him of course  you would think like this with a personality you   like yours I don't think any of your girlfriends  ever wanted you for anything other than money   now half of the family hates me and calls me  the jerk Kyle and his parents are on my side   but I got some rude messages from Mad siblings  and parents who called me a jerk I think op is   not the jerk I think this is if the shoe fits you  want to needlessly go around and accuse people of   being something they're not well op only went and  played the same exact game just Matt realizes hey   it kind of hurts when those things are said right  am I the jerk for telling my mother-in-law to get   lost me 27 year old female and my husband Seth  30 year old male have been together for over five   years last week Seth had to travel out of state  to attend his sister's wedding unfortunately I was   unable to attend due to work related issues Seth  was gone for a whole week and of course I missed   him terribly Seth and I don't get much quality  time together due to our stressful work schedules   I was still happy that he got to spend some  relaxing time with his family yesterday Seth and I   finally got the opportunity to spend a day off  together we decided to go for a cruise downtown in   our new car and then go out to eat at our favorite  restaurant Seth posted about our date night plans   on social media and the day started off very well  until we got to the restaurant as soon as we got   to the parking lot we see my mother-in-law  51 year old female standing near the entrance   she bolted towards us and gave Stephanie a big  hug she said that she saw our plans on social   media and decided to join us I was already very  upset but I bit my tongue because I didn't want   to make a scene in public I just tried my best  to hide the fact that I was not having a good   time during dinner after dinner was over we all  headed out to the parking lot and I said goodbye   to my mother-in-law my mother-in-law said that  she would join us back at our place to have some   drinks after she kept insisting that she join  us at our house I finally snapped at her I said   look I want to spend some a lot alone time with my  husband we almost never get to be alone together   you just spent a week-long luxury vacation with  him while I was stuck at home alone you already   ruined our date by barging in our dinner plans  just get lost my mother-in-law looked horrified   she started crying in power walked back to her car  Seth was stunned and started scolding me about how   cruel I was to his mother he said that I should  have just expressed to him how I was feeling   instead of making his mother feel unwanted am  I the jerk would you guys agree with me when I   say that I think both sides were jerks in the  situation inviting yourself is kind of always   a jerk move but also op just wasn't forthcoming  about how they were feeling let it bottle up and   then just exploded when Opie could have been  honest and just handled it in a civil way let   me know if you guys agree with me in the comments  down below our next story is from naptide am I the   jerk for kicking a family graduation party out of  the restaurant because the mom had written me an   hinged note the last time I served her I'm a  server at a bar and grill place a few weeks ago   a lady came in for drinks with a dude and left me  an unhinged note on a napkin calling me a slot for   wearing shorts and a crop top while working in 90  degree heat so my co-workers and I thought it was   actually pretty funny and we framed the napkin  in the check with the word who are on the spot   where the tip goes on the wall her signature was  also legible we also added her name to the do not   serve list just in case she came back since we  didn't want any trouble it's not like that was   weird for that place to have funny stuff hung  up we have all sorts of old Polaroids drawings   Etc taken with patrons or drawn by them it's the  kind of place where we make a chalk sign quoting   bad Yelp reviews as a joke I didn't expect to see  the lady back again like she obviously had a poor   time so why would she come back well last weekend  a big party had a reservation I believe a family's   college graduation party and I was going around  the table check IDs and the name model 1 looked   familiar I took a better look at the lady and  I realized it was the same person who wrote the   unhinged note so I gave her her ID back and said  I'm sorry I can't serve you I'm going to ask you   to leave she said that she was of age and didn't  understand what the problem was her family had   made the reservation weeks in advance I said yes  I'm aware but your name is on our do not serve   list she started getting mad saying I didn't know  what I was talking about she'd never been spoken   to before about this and her husband and a guy  who was either her father or father-in-law started   backing her up I went to grab the frame off the  wall with the napkin and I read it aloud and then   I said the establishment has a policy that we  cannot serve people who behave erratically or   aggressively after drinking and I was happy to  serve the rest of the group but I'd have to ask   her to leave a couple of my guy co-workers  gathered around to back me up she started   screaming at me saying it was her son's graduation  and also trying to snatch the frame I ended up   getting kind of petty and saying ma'am that's  the restaurant's copy of the receipt you were   given your own copy I'm going to need to get that  back and ask you to leave her husband said let's   just leave and the whole group left together which  was honestly more than I intended and her husband   yelled at me about how he was gonna call my  manager which was funny because my manager was the   one who bought the frame for her little unhinged  note the kid looked really ashamed and stressed   through this though and I felt pretty bad because  she was just trying to celebrate his graduation   and it's not like it's his fault his mom's a  little crazy am I the jerk for having kicked   the lady out of the restaurant I think this one's  pretty clear-cut right I think it's pretty clear   that if somebody is on the do not serve list for a  very valid reason that saying you can't serve them   and kicking them out of the restaurant regardless  of the circumstance is more than appropriate and   you wouldn't be a jerk for doing that although I  understand where Opie's getting hung up on it kind   of sucks to essentially take part in spoiling this  post-college graduation party but it's the mom's   fault more than anything this next story is from I  Evan polkady am I the jerk for not leaving when a   girl my girlfriend hates showed up I went to an  event with some friends this girl Carly who my   girlfriend Kenzie hates showed up and apparently I  was supposed to leave after she was there the plan   was for me and a group of friends to do something  Carly wasn't supposed to be there but she heard   from the mutual friend that I was gonna be there  so she invited herself with them she wanted the   chance to get to talk to me without Kenzie around  she says that Kenzie's probably told me a bunch   of lies about her and that's why I avoid her but  that Kenzie's always been an over exaggerating and   dramatic person she says that she doesn't see  a reason that the two of us can't be Pals with   each other except for me having a controlling and  jealous girlfriend whatever I I was friendly to   her and everyone else and we all had a good time  my girlfriend was upset at this apparently I was   supposed to leave after Carly showed up she was  livid she thinks that Carly only did that to get   under her skin and she knew that she could make  her mad by hanging out with her boyfriend all day   she's she only acts nicer around me and that she's  actually a backstabbing person PG version now I'm   starting to think that my girlfriend may actually  be a tad dramatic I'm not allowed to hang out with   friends and I need to leave because someone  she dislikes is there that just doesn't make   sense to me am I the jerk for not leaving like my  girlfriend said I should I'm a little conflicted   here because I would want to believe that op's  intention is just to hang out with their friends   and have a good time and despite Carly showing  up clearly to try to I don't know throw some   drama into the mix I think it's understandable OPI  wouldn't want to like ditch the friends or cause   drama by like speaking up about it but also Carly  was talking bad about op's girlfriend saying that   she's dramatic that she basically is showing up  just because op's there and op seems to suggest   that they didn't really do too much defending  their girlfriend and then also it could be seen   as like Ops defending Carly being around him all  day by saying that there wasn't a problem them   there or letting it just happen I don't know it's  a weird like drama nebula and I don't really know   if op is the jerk or not all I know is is this was  somebody that op's girlfriend clearly didn't like   who showed up unannounced spent the whole day with  her boyfriend and op kind of ended things saying   I don't know maybe my girlfriend is dramatic I'm  thinking op kind of got played but I don't know   if that makes them The Jerk by the way if you're  enjoying these stories make sure to hit those like   And subscribe buttons down below so you never miss  any of my daily videos every video has awesome   stories like our next one from DJ throwaway I  am I the jerk for refusing to take care of my   kid my friend 26 year old female and I 26 year old  male go back since elementary and we've been close   friends since then our families are also closed so  I don't have any attraction to her as a girlfriend   I see her like a sister most of my girlfriends  have been okay with her and I try to make it   clear the Divide we have as friends my my fiance's  close friends with my friend and has been friends   with her since before our relationship and so it  hasn't been any issues until now recently we had   a get-together where my friend said she couldn't  drink since she was pregnant we were all shocked   since she was single and she admitted she fooled  around with her ex and that might have gotten her   pregnant her exes across the country and a jerk so  she really screwed up her life with this I asked   her if she was going to keep the baby thinking  she might not but she exclaimed she would because   I could help her raise it my girlfriend stared at  her and I managed to ask why she thought that she   said we were best friends so I would be the father  and help raise the child I asked her where did you   get that idea and she got annoyed and said you're  always there for me and already like a husband so   I should be there for her son like a father I was  shocked because yes if she needed help with her   car I used to be a mechanic I would help since  she made minimum wage and can't afford one but I   didn't think she would take it as me wanting to be  her child's father or help raise it I took a deep   breath and told her I would always be your friend  but I'm not the father so I'm not helping her   raise her child and I'm not going to take a father  role she got mad and yelled at me for abandoning   her and started crying and a few of my friends  were shaking their heads and called me later to   tell me I should have been nicer I felt like if I  was nicer she wouldn't have gotten it and I wanted   to make the situation crystal clear my fiance  is mad because obviously it's caused a huge mess   my Saving Grace is that my fiance and I were in  another place visiting her family and traveling   for the month when the baby was conceived so no  one thinks I'm the actual father my friend's been   trying to call me and I'm not sure if I should  respond cool boy okay I don't blame LP one bit for   saying what they said here that's just a little  over the line that's a little bit of that crazy   the eyes grabs you by the arm and Moses up to  you saying you could be the father it's the kind   of talk that makes you go oh yeah I gotta use  the restroom real quick and then you jump out   the bathroom window and he just keep on running  our next story is from zookeeper game huge 627   am I the jerk for pulling all my money from the  account after he refused to stop making comments   about me getting a job 30 year old female and I'm  currently unemployed for the first time since I   was 15. even prior to when I would switch jobs  I already had employment lined up so there was   never a break between paychecks my husband would  have dry spells where he wouldn't work for some   months at a time get a job and then hardly ever  sticks with it for more than six months before   he quits and takes a break I didn't quit my last  job the company went belly up and didn't tell us   until people were coming in and shutting us down  I've been one month without a steady income but   I've been searching endlessly this all came to  a standstill when my husband's engine blew up in   his car so now he takes mine to work and leaves me  at the house so now I need something from home and   it's darn near impossible if you know of anything  remote entry level that doesn't require degrees   please let me know currently my husband works  Monday to Friday eight to four and just got a pay   raise and promotion two weeks ago since he got his  promotions he's been breathing down my neck about   me getting a job he sees all the applications I've  sent out and still comments on it as if that'll   help the situation I currently have 8 600 sitting  in the bank for my last job which would pay our   rent for eight months so his comments are really  starting to piss me off and I've told them several   times to get off of my case I've even suggested  that I go and work with him because he's taking my   car and making things impossible and he apparently  doesn't think it's a good idea anyways he started   in with the whole my money argument but only when  it's convenient for him like when he refers to   taxes it's our money I get significantly more  back than he does but when it comes to other   crap he says my money this my money that and it  only just started when he got the promotion he had   no problem living off my money though the entire  time he was unemployed because that was our money   like I said though I have money stashed so I don't  need crap from him but he made a comment the other   day saying you need a freaking job and it was the  last straw for me so I took my car and left to go   withdraw every penny I had in the bank account  and stick it into an account he can't touch   that left him with a little over nine hundred  dollars because the rest of the thousands were   mine he flips out and says I'm being financially  controlling when in all actuality it's him am I   the jerk I think Ops definitely not the jerk here  and if there's one thing I've always kind of hated   it's when people selectively use the my an hour  type talking like op described here as like a   minor comparison it makes me think of the like our  house my house parental thing where if a parent   wants you to help around the house and clean  something up or do a lot of work they say come   on we want to make our house look better right but  then if you want to do something or rearrange your   room or you want to I don't know stay up late  or something a lot of parents will be quick to   say you're not doing that in my house my house  my rules well op's putting their foot down and   saying my money my rules then if you're gonna make  it about money our next story is from throwawaydad   1112 am I the jerk for celebrating my birthday  my mom died in childbirth to me when my older   brothers were six and eight my entire childhood  was more or less mourning for her which I was   not allowed to be involved in my birthday was not  allowed to be celebrated or talked about under any   circumstances and I never got anything for them  when I got older and understood that most people   had a mom and I didn't it upset me a lot lot  every time I cried about missing her my dad would   tell me that I'd never met her and that I didn't  deserve to miss her now this is where I'm probably   the jerk this year I turned 18. and I decided that  I would have a birthday party for myself which was   just some drinks with friends and going to see  a movie I posted about this on social media and   was instantly flooded with messages from my family  telling me that I shouldn't celebrate my birthday   and that all my family was at my mom's grave and  that I should have been there this is something   I've been told repeatedly I'm not allowed to  visit so am I the jerk frankly I think the way   op's been treated is unbelievable I don't think  you could ever possibly be the jerk for wanting   to celebrate your own birthday and frankly I think  if anything they should try to celebrate the life   of the mother they should try to celebrate op  being here when op's birthday comes around they   should make it a celebration of the life not try  to Outcast op from everything and anything and   telling them what they can and can't do on their  day of birth imagine seriously looking at your   kid and telling them they can't cry because  they're sad they don't have a mom everybody   in this family is out here gatekeeping being sad  about their mom try to make that make sense our   next story is from every 10 am I the jerk because  my friend ordered the same dishes me and couldn't   pay for it my 19 year old female three friends  19 year old female 20 year old female and 20 year   old male and I were going out to a restaurant  and another student 19 year old male from our   summer study abroad program that we've befriended  in the past three weeks asked to come we said of   course he could come it was a slightly upscale  restaurant with a Michelin star we all ordered   our own meals our newer friend couldn't really  understand the menu since it wasn't in English   and his Spanish isn't that proficient yet so he  was Google translating then he gave up and just   told the waiter he'll have what I'm having he  didn't know the price since the menu didn't have   prices but we all assumed if he was concerned  about price he'd ask the staff but he did not   the table bill was about eleven hundred dollars  it was a hundred dollars for the appetizers and   about 200 for each person's main course we'd all  agreed before to each pay for ourselves and then   split the bill for the appetizers our friend was  shocked that his meal was two hundred dollars and   City didn't have enough money for that he started  talking to the waiter questioning each charge and   became more distressed then he demanded to know  why I didn't tell him the price first it wasn't   in the menu so I didn't know exactly but the  price was about what I expected it to be he could   have asked the waiter if he was worried about it  instead of just saying I'll have the same thing   I'm not sure what he expected since this is not  a cheap place he used his emergency credit card   to pay and was quite upset he said I should have  told him the price my meal was no more expensive   than anyone else's at the table I I'm not sure why  he didn't just ask the waiter am I the jerk this   really depends on what op or their friends told  this guy beforehand if they mention that they're   going to a Michelin star restaurant and what that  means meaning it's a very fancy upscale restaurant   then I don't think op's the jerk for them coming  along and ordering the same Dish as op but if this   friend went along blind had no idea and nobody  felt the need to mention that you're going to a   Michelin star restaurant like if nobody felt the  need to ever mention that this is a fancy upscale   place and it's going to be expensive then I think  there's a little bit of validity of saying that   Opie or their friends might be a little bit of a  jerk here our next story is from whistlerblue16   am I the jerk for refusing to order specialty  uniforms for a plus size employee I work as a   manager for a customer service department at a  large tourist attraction we have a new employee   we'll call Kate employees are required to wear  a uniform consisting of a branded Polo and   whatever work appropriate slacks people choose  to wear the largest size we currently have in   the polo is a 2XL Kate is a plus-sized lady and  she requested the largest size available I gave   her the 2XL and it seemed to fit fine however  after the first week on the job she came to my   office and said she'd like to talk she told me  that she feels the uniform is too constricting   and the fabric makes her uncomfortable she said  it was unaccommodating to bigger staff members   to only offer a clingy form-fitting Polo the  polos are a dry fit polyester material I let   her know that I could order a bigger size for  her but it would take two to three weeks for   the custom ones to come in she asked if I could  order her a different style of shirt and I said   no because the uniforms need to be consistent she  seemed dissatisfied with this answer but we ended   the conversation today I open my email to receive  an email from Kate that can be summarized as it is   disrespectful and this discriminatory practice  to refuse to accommodate plus size employees   by not allowing me to wear a uniform I feel  comfortable in you've made this an unwelcome   and hostile work environment for me if management  is unable to order an appropriate uniform for me   I will promptly be leaving this position Kate is  otherwise a solid employee and has had no issues   with attendance or customer service am I the Jerk  by not caving to her demands here frankly I'm of   the opinion that Ops not the jerk I believe that  as long as you can go a little bit higher in size   that you should be able to reach a size shirt  that fits Kate comfortably if they're unhappy   with how constricting the shirt is then going up  to 3x might not be the best option you might need   to go even a little bit higher than that dry fit  polyester material is a very standard shirt and   if Kate can understand that a bigger size would  be less constricting then I don't really know   if you're ever going to truly be able to please  Kate our next story is from home would I be the   jerk if I don't give my employee the day off for  her sick daughter okay I know the title sounds   bad but please hear me out I 42 year old female am  one of the CEOs slash managers of a multi-located   company I'm the CEO of one of the six locations  they have and because of that I'm responsible   for the schedules and employees have to request  stays and time off through me one of my employees   is a woman named Kate 36 and not her real name  she's already asked all of her time off not yet   taking them but already asked and given days off  in the future think about vacation and then just   random day she finds important so conclusion  she does not have any days left to ask off yet   she still put in a request and I denied it with  the comments that she already used all her days   and with the question if she wanted to switch one  of her days she didn't want to she really needed   the day off I denied it again and a day later  she stormed into my office yelling at me that   she really needed that day I asked her to close  the door and take a seat so we could discuss the   issue that's when she told me that her daughter  seven has cancer the day she requested off was a   chemo day for her daughter and Kate's husband  couldn't take the day off due to a project he   was working on she cried telling me her daughter  missed so much school already she has to redo the   year I immediately felt sorry for Kate wished her  the best and promised to make something work when   she left I was almost in tears cancer always hits  me personally since I lost a few family members   myself due to this disease now mind you my son  seven goes to the same school as Kate's daughter   they share some classes so that evening I asked  him if he knew Kate's daughter was sick and if   she missed a lot of school already and if he knew  what her favorite snacks are I wanted to make some   kind of Health Care basket as a gift to Kate from  all her colleagues my son told me Kate's daughter   is not sick has never missed a day at school and  she always brings a specific snack and he would   try to get the name for me he even proceeded to  tell me that they actually talk quite a lot at   school and have mutual friends I was shocked to  discover Kate's lie and almost immediately wanted   to deny her day off again but my husband told me  to try and cool down for a minute I didn't now I'm   torn between choosing to believe my employee or  my own son so read it tell me would I be the jerk   if I believe my son and deny my employee her day  off again I think if op can be without a shadow   of a doubt positive that the person their son is  referencing at school is Kate's daughter for sure   and that they're a hundred percent accurate about  them always being there and seeming just fine and   bringing their own snacks and whatnot then I would  have no remorse whatsoever denying Kate that day   off because using that as a lie is in insane the  one thing I like is people in the comments are   saying go overboard with the kindness to call  them out on it act like you didn't find out and   start like trying to get like a community effort  in pool people at work to try to contribute and   try to create an outpouring of support you know  just really sink this person for using such a   crazy lie our next story is from random regen 44  am I the jerk for not inviting our stepbrother on   a Brother's trip I 28 year old male my brother 26  and our half brother 20 used to go on an annual   trip with our dad since my dad had a serious  health complication three years ago it turned into   a Brother's trip we used to invite our stepbrother  years ago but he never wanted to go step brother   28 is our youngest brother's half-brother we do  not get along at all our dad married his mom when   I was eight my mother's been dead for six years by  then but his parents have been divorced for four   years his dad was very wealthy and determined  in to drive a wedge between us there was also   a good dose of Parental alienation but since Mom  stepmom and Dad couldn't afford to fight him in   court they did their best to keep the peace he  refused to be respectful towards my dad rubbed   his expensive toys and our faces which now seems  to be not a big deal but then was very hurtful   Etc I guess the point where we completely wrote  him off was when we were 16. he had a car and   never allowed Us in it it was raining heavily and  he refused to drive us to school then he drove by   us while we were walking and kept insulting dad  for our youngest brother stepbrother hated him the   moment he was born used to bully him if we didn't  keep an eye on him there was an incident that   ended with the youngest needing medical help and  he hated his older brother since then a couple of   years ago stepbrother came out as gay his father  disowned him mom and dad did the decent thing and   supported him and we also said that we accepted  him but that that was that last week we went on   our trip as usual then last Sunday we were having  a family dinner and stepbrother was there we   showed our parents the photos we took and shared  some stories stepbrother excused himself halfway   through but we thought nothing of it later mom  told us that he broke down in the kitchen saying   that he felt excluded and wished that we'd invited  him I just hummed but the youngest told Mom Point   Blank that it was a trip for us Brothers he  didn't qualify she didn't insist or anything   but she seemed down now I'm feeling a bit guilty  am I the jerk the situation is a little sucky   because you don't want to see anybody feeling bad  or feeling left out like that but in all fairness   op and their brothers aren't jerks here because  like op said for years they try to invite them   and they never wanted to go and frankly for a long  time it seems like the stepbrother was pretty cold   to all of them until literally they were all they  had left and you know seemed to have a change of   heart so I think that's also also another reason  for just not feeling super open to inviting them   our next story is from Hope incarnate am I the  jerk for pointing out a fake service dog i 27 year   old female pregnant was at Walmart with my husband  30 year old male when we decided to go through the   fruit aisle there was a small cluster of people  talking with a lady who had a large poodle dang   they get big with a red service dog vest on it  the vest had no handle no patches or a card on   it but I don't know what they require on their  vests so I can't say if it was missing anything   or if it was fine in all honesty I only have a  vague understanding about service dogs enough to   know not to bother them the problem was that as we  veered our cart around the small crowd the service   dog was all over the place sniffing people's cards  putting its paws on the cart baskets just a little   out of control wasn't aggressive at all not mean  or anything but the dog was definitely tugging   on that leash as hard as he could because he was  excited and confused at first I thought okay he's   probably in training and he's an early bird to the  game I've seen videos of some service dogs being   trained publicly like that which is understandable  to me but as we went past the crowd the dog turned   to me and I didn't look at it or engage with it  because I know that's wrong and distracting even   though I turned to my husband the dog barked  and jumped on me no harm wasn't mean or biting   everything was fine until the lady yelled at me  and said you're too close to my service dog you're   distracting him I replied with with the way he's  behaving I'm inclined to think otherwise I don't   think that's a real service dog she complained and  got the staff to come over and talk to us and we   gave them the story and the lady with the dog was  asked to leave was I the jerk I think Ops clearly   not the jerk here these people bring a dog in  service dog or otherwise that's excited of pulling   on a leash and jumping on people I think you're  gonna get asked to leave regardless of whether   that's a true service dog or not and any service  dog acting out like that being called out I think   is totally justified and our final story of the  day is from acceptable priority 71 am I the jerk   for skateboarding even though my daughters teased  and humiliated over it I've finally been doing the   things I've been wanting to do in my life since  I got divorced one of them being a skateboarder   sure I'm 44 but it's never too late to try to  be the bad to the bone version of yourself my   daughter for some reason is humiliated by me  taking up skateboarding says I'm too old and   that everyone at school makes fun of her for it  she said everyone laughs when I show up to school   early and skate around the parking lot the other  day I came to get her and did a little trick on   the curb but wasn't able to land it and fell when  we get in the car she starts hysterically crying   that I embarrassed her and why can't I just be  like the other dads and why can't I respect to   request to just not skate around her school she  said I'm a jerk and a terrible dad a part of me   wants to keep her happy and not skate and I get  that I might be a jerk for continuing to do what   embarrasses her but another part of me thinks  that she needs to be happy for me and let me be   my best self and that I'm not doing anything wrong  for wanting to be happy so Reddit am I the jerk   I can only speak for myself and I feel like if I  was in the kids situation with my parents skating   around in the school parking lot I would be a  little mortified as well especially if they're   not good enough to land any of the things they're  trying to do it's basically like drawing an unjust   amount of attention towards your kid op learning  skateboarding and practicing it there's nothing   wrong with that but maybe not in the school  parking lot just accept that it's embarrassing   for her for you to do it in the school parking  lot in front of her and her friends or her   peers just practice elsewhere and pick up your  skateboarding in a different place that doesn't   negatively affect your daughter am I the jerk for  not making enough dinner for my mother-in-law and   ignoring her completely I 29 year old female  live in an apartment with my husband 31 year   old male recently my mother-in-law's come to  visit since she's trying to relocate here she's   been staying with us since hotels and airbnbs are  at an all-time high she's been here a month and   it's been well difficult she doesn't help with  anything like cooking or cleaning she also takes   my husband's car without knowledge so I have to  give him a ride to work she also throws stuff   away she thinks we don't use she's also been going  shopping lately buying Decor she was only supposed   to stay two weeks to see if she likes it here  and try to find a home it seems like she wants   to relocate here and like she found her home  with us I've had conversations with my husband   to get her to leave he's asked and begged but she  still doesn't want to leave and he doesn't want to   disrespect her I've remained kind but I couldn't  take it anymore I went into the guest room she's   staying in and cleared it out I took out all the  clothes out of the dresser and closet and put it   into her suitcase I also put all her things on the  floor she came home and yelled at me then got into   a fight with my husband she then apologized and  said she couldn't afford the plane ticket back   and if my husband books it she leaves well he  did for yesterday she refused to go because it   was the cheapest ticket on the cheapest airline  and that she was worth more than that we got into   another fight and she got a hotel for the night  well today she came here and opened the door was   unlocked she then passed us and put all of her  things in the empty guest room she went to the   living room where we were and said well are you  guys ready to apologize we were dumbfounded of   course I stormed on my bedroom and locked myself  in there I took a nap and came out and they were   both watching TV it was around six at the time  and I decided to start getting dinner ready when   I started my mother-in-law went and started trying  to talk to me basically saying I should apologize   she noticed I was ignoring her and started yelling  I kept ignoring her until she went with my husband   I blocked out the conversation I was quiet and  set the plates I only made enough servings for   both me and my husband I sat and ate and they  came to do the same she saw that there were only   two plates and went to look for more food there  wasn't any I don't know how it happened but we   got to a huge fight and I ended up throwing all  of her clothes outside and screaming at her for   all my neighbors to see she was crying and my  husband was begging for me to stop I drove to   my friend's shaking and mad I passed out and woke  up to paragraphs upon paragraphs of not just my   husband and mother-in-law but sister-in-law and  brother-in-law basically telling me I'm a jerk   and a stupid witch for disrespecting mother-in-law  and embarrassing her well I have no idea what to   feel so am I the jerk for how I reacted as  somebody myself that loves my own personal   space and I don't like being encroached upon very  much by anybody my mother-in-law moving into my   apartment and trying to basically live there for  the rest of their life would drive me crazy not   even because of the relationship between me and my  mother-in-law just to me it feels like privacy has   just gone out the window in that situation I think  op is not the jerk here and I think it potentially   might get kind of messy with their relationship  because to me it sounds like the husband's kind   of siding with their mom do you guys think this  is gonna cause a real strain on op's relationship   here let me know what you guys think down in the  comments our next story is from public muffin   2185 am I the jerk for refusing to go to the  funeral of my stepmom's mom my mom died when I   was a baby and my dad married my stepmom when I  was four she had three kids with her ex-husband   and I have two siblings who were born after my  dad and stepmom were married stepmom had a big   family and her mom was the heart of the family  and she was always so generous with her grandkids   but it was always clear I was not one of them my  dad and stepmom insisted I couldn't be left out   so she just got me lesser stuff things like used  coloring books second hand and mostly broken toys   basic socks that were often too small and ratty  old second-hand books once I got a little older in   comparison my step-siblings and younger siblings  got video games video game consoles expensive   toys like go-karts and big doll houses cell phones  laptops Etc they also got treated to special trips   that I wasn't welcome on she would also secretly  give them money or grab ice cream with them and   leave me out when everyone was gathered she also  took photos behind my dad and stepmom's back but   even when they did find out nothing was done I  felt like crap honestly my step sibling's dad   hated me too and they never accepted me because so  many adults in their life didn't I've always felt   like my dad and stepmom should have protected  me more she always said I was her daughter too   but but let me be treated so differently they  all know it hurt I'm 17 now and my stepmom's   mom passed away recently and her funeral's in a  couple of days I told them I won't go they wanted   me to pretend to be The Grieving grandchild and  join the others but I'm not grieving and I was   clearly never a grandchild my dad and stepmom  are mad at me for saying no dad said I should   be there for my stepmom am I the jerk I think  Ops not the jerk here and I think it's pretty   simple as saying if Opie's father thinks that  op should be there for their stepmom then the   Stepmom should have been there for op over the  last 13 years or so and frankly she wasn't and   they might argue that but I think anybody who  hears the story knows the truth our next story   is from y'all not eight am I the jerk for only  paying for son's wedding I'm a 57 year old male   who has three kids 30 male 27 female and 25 male  me and my wife have paid for each of my two oldest   sweating things which have covered dresses suits  Bridal parties if they want to make a destination   wedding we covered guests who couldn't afford it  in the honeymoon now there was no budget placed   on them my oldest sweating was around 85 000. my  middle kids was around 120 000. now my youngest is   getting married him and his soon-to-be wife don't  believe in big weddings and the total is around 20   000. now my kids don't know how much each  other's weddings cost as I didn't share and   I guess they didn't see the need to bring it up  so the problem came up this past weekend with my   soon-to-be daughter-in-law talking to my middle  daughter and my oldest son's wife about their   weddings and I guess the totals came up now my  youngest son and his fiance are demanding that   I write them a check for the difference for down  payment on a condo or house I refused and stated   that I was only paying for their wedding and now  they're threatening to disinvite me so am I the   jerk I think Ops definitely not the jerk here I  kind of get where they're coming from as far as   internalized feelings but the fact of the matter  is op's interest and focus only has ever been to   pay for the wedding basically if they want to  go have a huge massive wedding still they can   if they want to have a smaller wedding they can  have that too the basic thing is op's just going   to cover the cost regardless frankly if they try  to kick op out of the wedding that they're paying   for I think op should be Petty and just cancel the  whole thing I'll tell you one thing though they're   doing a great job of trying to make sure that  op never helps them in the future monetarily if   they need it by the way if you're enjoying these  stories make sure to hit those like And subscribe   buttons down below so you never miss any of my  daily videos our next story is from throw act   away am I the jerk for telling my daughter the  truth about where her birthday gift came from I   30 year old male got divorced two years ago to my  ex-wife Jane 33 year old female we have a daughter   together 10 year old female Riley two weeks ago  it was her birthday there was this bike that Riley   wanted really badly so I decided to get it for her  beforehand I checked with Jane to make sure it was   okay that I bought Riley this Jane said that it  was fine and that she didn't care on the day of   her birthday came and it was time to open presents  Jane acted like the bike was her gift to Riley   because she forgot to get Riley one I wasn't going  to embarrass her in front of everyone so I let it   slide after that I told Jane that she better tell  Riley that she didn't get her the bike and that   I did or else I would tell Riley I gave Jean time  to tell Riley but she didn't it's important to add   in the past that when Jane had forgotten to get  Riley gifts I let her act as if it was a shared   gift or she bought it and I would end up having  to buy another one yesterday I ended up telling   Riley that the bike she got was from me she told  me that she knew it was for me because there was   a card in the box but she didn't say anything Jane  ended up finding out and got mad at me and told me   that I was selfish for doing that I think op is  clearly not the jerk and I think it's almost a   joke that the mother of the child forgot their own  kid's birthday as far as getting a gift how do you   forget your own child's birthday is it routine for  this person to buy gifts the week of if your kid's   birthday is coming up don't you want to buy like  a month early and then you stick it in the back of   your closet on the top shelf or something our next  story is from Cherry sherbet am I the jerk for   not thinking the guy who held the door open for  me I 35 year old female was walking down a long   Corridor I'm pregnant so I walk a bit slower than  usual I've seen a guy in the front of me holding   the door open for me for no reason I had to run  30 plus meters to get to the door so he doesn't   have to wait now I'm breathless smiled nervously  and walked past him as he gestured he said why   not a thank you I'm now confused well I didn't ask  you to hold the door I can perfectly do it I had   to rush and you created the situation for the both  of us and now as asking for a thank you women can   open doors by themselves my hands were free am I  being a jerk I think Opie is definitely not the   jerk this takes me right back to Middle School  to preface I was extremely quiet introverted   never talked to anybody in between classes I was  walking to the next class and my art teacher from   the year before happened to be walking in front of  me and opened the door to the next building where   I needed to go they held it open so I walked  in and remember I'm quiet and introverted so   I don't say anything I just quickly go by and  the teacher goes you're welcome your highness   so there I am like oh uh thank you on my way to  class and like it's one of those things that's   so mild looking back on it but I had like such a  flash of panic insecurity and like was I The Jerk   for this older lady opening the door for me and  not saying thank you on my way in this next story   is from try for a baby aita am I the jerk for  telling my friend's boyfriend my husband and I are   trying to conceive my husband and I went out with  my friend and her boyfriend at one point just her   boyfriend and I were talking and he asked me how  long my husband and I have been married for after   I answered that he asked me if we wanted kids and  I told him we were trying to conceive I didn't   get any weird vibe off of him the conversation  just continued and I wouldn't have thought of it   again but my friend called me to tell me that that  made him very uncomfortable once we got home she   he said he said he didn't need to know we were  raw dogging or anything else about our sex life   I guess that is what it means but I haven't told  that by other couples before and it's never made   me imagine them in the ACT I've never even thought  of it as inappropriate and I'm not a person who   talks about sex at all my friends always been  much more open than me so it's just so surprising   coming from her I mean I know it's coming from  him but I thought he was being pervy taking it   that way she said he thought it was pervy for me  to say it my husband says it's totally normal and   the guy is just a creep but my husband's spoken  with his family about this too so he sees it   the same as me I know my intentions weren't bad  so I'm mostly asking for the future because it   technically does mean that I don't want to offend  or gross anyone out am I the jerk I think saying   that you're trying to conceive is a very simple  and common thing to say and I would agree with   the notion that him being uncomfortable with it  is him being confused and not in an appropriate   way to me I think this dude is taking it  totally sexually in his mind and because   they're unattracted by the thought that they're  having that's the issue they're having it's gross   and weird to them only in that context unless  the context they're stuck on which most rational   people either don't associate or wouldn't be stuck  on I sure hope nobody ever mentions to this guy   how literally every single person in existence  came to be conception that's the answer our next   story is from just need judgment am I the jerk for  reporting a co-worker because she keeps on asking   about the baby I gave away I 23 year old female  have been with my long-term boyfriend same age for   a while now back in August 2021 when I was 22 I  found out I was pregnant after a lot of crying and   thinking I decided to carry the pregnancy and put  the baby up for adoption this is my decision and   I'm wholly happy with my decision in fact while  pregnant I actually got in touch with an adoption   agency and found a nice couple Brian and Connor  to adopt the baby I graduated for college in May   2021 majored in civil engineering and I got a very  nice desk job after school the job was remote when   I began but the beginning of 2022 my company  wanted employees to come into the office two   to three days a week honestly this time was tough  for me I was visibly pregnant I don't know if it   really makes sense but I was okay being pregnant I  wasn't uncomfortable or in pain and I was Slash am   happy to give my baby to a more financially  and emotionally available family but at the   same time I knew how much stigma is around young  pregnant women and I wanted to keep my pregnancy   Under Wraps I was just afraid of the stairs the  questions the Judgment especially with the people   I work with I just didn't want my co-workers  to judge me or make me feel uncomfortable so   I didn't tell them I was pregnant it or that I'm  giving the baby up co-workers did stare at the   beginning and asked some questions like a very  intense how are you how are you sleeping how do   you feel one woman in particular kept on asking  these questions and giving advice I answer these   questions in I feel a professional manner and made  it clear I don't want to discuss my pregnancy but   she kept on asking I began avoiding this co-worker  and answering her questions more bluntly I just   don't want to discuss my pregnancy she took notice  and stopped with the questions and advice but once   my baby was born and given to the couple the woman  began with the questions and advice and comments   again how was the baby what's her name how was  the delivery how's the baby sleeping you just   not sleeping well huh I don't want to talk about  this or be bombarded with these questions I filed   a report with HR HR talked to the woman but now  half the office thinks I'm rude and standoffish   did I do something wrong am I a jerk here I  think Ops definitely not the jerk and they   shouldn't feel bad the problem is these people  just don't get it they don't know what's going   on in op's life op has every right not to share  anything with these people all these people around   op at work are just operating off of assumptions  these people have no clue what op's going through   I feel for op I think the whole thing could be  resolved if op mentioned what happened but I feel   like Opie has every right to remain private about  the details of their lives with their co-workers   our next story is from throwaways scared b-day  am I the jerk for yelling at my Aunt to shut up   in front of a restaurant full of people one  eye 30 year old male was five my family took   me to one of those Japanese steakhouses where  they cook the food at your table when the cook   lit the grill and the huge flame shot up into  the air it scared the heck out of me and I ran   and hid in the corner and was too afraid to come  back to the table my aunt 64 year old female has   teased me about that ever since that was 25 years  ago and I swear she brings it up at every single   time I see her I've told her repeatedly to stop  talking about it my parents have also asked her   to stop bringing it up to no avail it's gotten  so tiresome and embarrassing and she teases me   about it in front of the whole family despite me  repeatedly telling her to stop I've never really   gotten a long well of my aunt and lately I've  made it a point to avoid her at family gatherings   we celebrated my birthday Friday and I wanted  to go to one of those Japanese steakhouses I   didn't invite my aunt but my grandmother invited  her behind my back I didn't know she was coming   until she showed up I was already pissed off  that my grandmother invited her she told me   that my aunt is family and I can't just exclude  her from everything but as soon as we sat down   my aunt started ribbing me about that incident  when I was five I told her to stop bringing it   and my mom told her to stop as well but when the  cook was fixing to light the Hibachi she asked   me in this really condescending way you sure you  don't want to go hide in the corner For Old Times   Sake I finally lost my temper and went off on  her right there in front of the whole restaurant   I basically yelled at her will you just shut up  about that already that was 25 years ago is that   literally all you have to talk about I'm sick of  hearing about it this is why I didn't invite you I   swear the entire restaurant must have been staring  at me and I felt like walking out the entire rest   of the dinner was awkward and I couldn't even  enjoy my meal after we left my grandmother told   me that I embarrassed her in front of everyone and  that my Outburst was completely uncalled for and   that I owed my aunt an apology my parents told me  that I didn't know my aunt anything and were angry   at my grandmother for inviting her but I still  feel like a jerk for losing my temper and yelling   in front of the restaurant and the whole thing was  deeply embarrassing my grandmother and my aunt are   both blasting me on Facebook for embarrassing them  in public so am I the jerk I think op is clearly   not the jerk and I think it is so loaded for them  to go and say oh P you embarrassed your aunt op   your aunt deserves an apology from you well what  about the last 25 years of embarrassing op like   I said earlier I'm an introvert I'm not outgoing  I'm not a social person having something like this   happen over 25 years I would be pissed off too  and I would yell at them too frankly if I'm op   I'm telling grandmother and aunt the truth about  how they felt for the last 25 years and anytime   they even mention an apology or embarrassing them  pound that 25-year truth into that conversation   maybe they'll finally realize you haven't been  messing around for the last two plus decades   our next story is from this lovely love am I the  jerk for being the reason my friend's daughter   had to go to the hospital I know the title sounds  horrible but I don't know how else to put it I'm   not a very busy person I don't start college until  September and I don't have a job so not much to   do a few weeks ago my friend Alice 22 year old  female came to my door with her daughter Millie   three-year-old female and told me she really needs  me apparently she had an emergency to attend to   and she needed an urgent sitter she didn't really  ask and just gave me the kid and a bag of toys and   books and told me she would be back around in a  few hours I have no problem with this at least   a very sweet kid and she knows me well enough  to be comfortable around me still it was a bit   unexpected but I was going out to the cinema so  I thought I would take her with me and we'd walk   around a bit and watch something everything went  smoothly we watched a movie together Millie seemed   happy and I was enjoying my time as well then  we went to the park and I thought it would be   nice to get us some ice cream we both had vanilla  Swirls and she seemed to enjoy it for a bit but   as soon as we got home she started throwing up and  developed what seemed to be a rash I thought maybe   she got a bug or something and called her mom but  when she didn't pick up I took her to the hospital   apparently Millie has a mild allergy to Dairy  Alice didn't tell me this I've never seen Alice   give her Dairy but I thought that was a dietary  choice and to be honest I didn't take that much   notice to it I never knew this explicitly she  was safe and nothing bad was going to happen to   her but she was obviously very uncomfortable until  the antihistamines kicked in I kept calling Alice   and she only picked up a few hours later and as  soon as I told her we were at the hospital she got   Furious when she came in she yelled at me telling  me I was trying to kill her baby because I had to   take care of her on such short notice and I was an  idiot for not knowing her child would react like   this to ice cream I apologized many times sent  them cards and a present for me but apparently   she's been telling our group of friends that I  tried to hurt Millie and I should not be trusted   around children some of our friends have berated  me for my lack of attention and told me that I   would have to carry the responsibility if anything  worse had happened to Millie I try to explain how   I didn't know and nothing worse was going to  happen and I did my best to help her but it   still became a divisive event am I the jerk is it  really all my fault I really want what's best for   Millie and I would never do anything to hurt her  it's pretty clear hope he's not the jerk in the   situation the kid was dumped on them they didn't  know their allergies Alice never mentioned I hope   he's just trying to take care of a three-year-old  kid you give kids ice cream all the time I guess   you could try to be crazy cautious but you're  gonna wrap them in a bubble until mom gets   back because they might be allergic to just about  anything our next story is from one day at a time   777 am I the jerk for not giving my inheritance to  any of my siblings my dad's passed away and I've   gotten all of his inheritance my dad raised us in  strict military style household he was a horrible   father who took things to the extreme in our  childhood and all of his children stopped talking   to him he treated us like we were his property and  belittle us all the time almost as if he hated our   existence he actually disowned me when I was 15  because I'd gotten pregnant out of marriage with   a man who was black and kicked me out to fend for  myself so I had to figure out how to provide for   myself and my child my dad ended up contacting  me a month after my mom passed away crying and   apologizing on how he treated me and my siblings  and asked if we could meet up I decided to meet   up with my dad because even though my dad wasn't  the greatest father it doesn't change my love for   him when we met up my dad seemed very genuine  so I continued seeing him which increased in me   seeing him three times a week my dad also tried  contacting my siblings but but none of them gave   him the time of day I spoke to my siblings about  the issue and they basically told me to allow him   to die a lonely death later on my dad got super  sick and I ended up moving in with him with my two   children to help take care of him I learned things  about my dad that I never knew and I actually   started to love being around him and seeing him  as a different person I chose to forgive him it   was hard looking after my dad and my two children  as a single mother but I pushed myself through it   until his death but during the hard times I asked  my siblings for help and they both mocked me for   even helping my dad told me I should just throw  him in an old age home and even asked for me to   take pictures of him so they could see him weak  my siblings and I relationship used to be super   close but ever since I started talking to my dad  they became distant now that my dad's passed I've   inherited everything from him and learned that  my father owned a lot more properties and had   a lot more money than I could have ever imagined  my siblings feel like they're entitled to some of   the inheritance and have told me that if I don't  give them any they'll stop talking to me and that   I'm becoming like my dad they feel like since they  had to go through having my dad as a father that   they deserve some kind of payout I disagree with  them the reason I got the inheritance is because   I gave my dad another chance I helped him when  he was at his weakest and I went through a lot   juggling raising my children and caring for my dad  without any of their help even when I begged them   to help me they just made fun of me for helping  my dad and choosing to forgive him now forgiveness   is a choice and I respect their choice not to  forgive but they didn't respect mine to forgive   him and added more difficulty to my life they act  like it was either them or my dad and now they're   acting like I'm being selfish for not sharing the  inheritance my dad left for me am I the jerk for   not giving some of my inheritance to my brother  and sister I think op is not the jerk and I agree   with a lot of what op said here I think their  decision to cut off their dad not feel any remorse   or forgive them for anything that's a very valid  thing just as much as I think op is very valid for   actually forgiving them and going back and helping  them and bottom line my personal stance is if you   get an inheritance that was specifically left for  you you owe nothing to anybody they can go try to   fight it through courts or whatnot but the fact of  the matter is they left it to you for a reason if   you want to help them out or give anything to them  that's great if not it's your inheritance as much   as the siblings want to say that Opie's becoming  like their dad and that's the reason for any of   this I think the real reason is money brings out  the worst in people they feel remotely attached   to some of that wealth and they want a piece of it  and they're gonna make you feel bad and hopefully   trick you into giving some up our next story  is from aita throwaway 7101 1. am I the jerk   for telling my sister she knows full well why our  dad didn't offer to contribute to her wedding my   33 year old female dads told us me and my siblings  before that he'll contribute a certain amount for   our weddings we don't have to take it but he'll  offer it and anything more is up to the person   getting married is sort out dad contributed to my  wedding in 2019 as well as my half-sisters a few   months ago my sister Jane 30 year old female she's  kind and smart but also the type of person who's   shy and timid around strangers but can be really  hot-headed around people she knows Jane does tend   to be a little selfish at times and holds on to  small things for example she let go of a really   excellent guy she was dating in the past because  of some petty things that could have been solved   I'm not saying this to be mean by the way she can  be kind and caring but these are the full facts   of the situation and our parents also know of her  nature Jane is engaged to Jack 35 year old male   who she's been with for the past couple of years  they've sort of been on and off and it does seem   like the engagement is a bit for a show now data  said that he won't be contributing to Jane and   Jack's wedding because of Jane's nature and their  unstable relationship and he doesn't want his   money to go to laws Gina said before that she and  Jack can fund the wedding themselves so they won't   need dad's contribution Jane's into the wedding  planning stage and as stated dad didn't offer her   monetary she got upset that he didn't offer so  I told her that she said that they wouldn't need   it anyway Jane replied that they wouldn't but  she thought he'd still ask because he did for   us me and half-sister she made an unnecessarily  big deal about it so I told her she knows full   well-wide dad didn't offer and she's being petty  as per usual Jane got really mad and now blocked   me on social media and isn't picking up my calls  and messages our mom said I went too far I don't   think so because they weren't going to take  the money anyway but was I the jerk I think   P was the jerk here because I feel like this whole  thing was just unnecessary to say even if you feel   like it is the absolute truth you don't need to go  and tell them well you know why Dad wouldn't give   you the money right is that ever going to resolve  in a good peaceful situation I don't think so and   it just doesn't need to be said considering she's  getting married to this person how about just   trying to support them and hoping that things work  out for them and our final story of the day is   from Harry disaster 20 am I the jerk for kicking a  girl out of my wedding party I 28 year old female   am getting married tomorrow and a few months ago  I invited my fiance's two younger cousins 15 year   old female and 14 year old female to be junior  bridesmaids in the wedding party the girls were   very excited to participate and both of them knew  the date of the wedding I picked out dresses that   complemented their hair colors perfectly brown  and blonde a nice blue color that looked pretty   on both of them after we got the dresses in and  the girls tried them on I made some jokes about   not making any two drastic changes like getting  a tan or dyeing their hair before the wedding   a few months after this I had my bridal luncheon  which was yesterday and had all my bridesmaids in   attendance the younger cousin who was blonde had  dyed her hair a bright shade of red which meant   her hair no longer match the dress this wouldn't  have been too much of an issue if it was darker   but the color was way too bright almost fire truck  red and did not look good compared to the dress   she was drawing attention away from all the other  bridesmaids and myself and stuck out immensely in   pictures I was very upset by this as she knew  the wedding was approaching and that if she   made any drastic changes like that she wouldn't  have matched the rest of the Bridesmaids after   the luncheon I pulled her aside and asked her to  step down as a bridesmaid because her hair was   way too bright and would distract from everyone  else at the wedding she got a upset and started   crying running off without saying another word  I got a very angry text from her mother later   that day saying that I shouldn't have made as big  a deal as I had and that she could have just worn   a wig or something am I the jerk here I think  op is definitely a jerk I understand wanting   to have the perfect wedding and you want all the  attention to be on you justifiably so but I think   this is way too much of an overreaction over a 15  or 14 year old girl that went and dyed their hair   their hair might stand out it might not match the  color of the dress but I don't think it matters I   don't think you should care and kicking them out  over having dyed their hair a color they wanted I   think is a definite jerk move Welcome Friends to  another r slash am I the jerkier video would you   be the jerk for filing a police report on your  parents we'll find out but first a story from   yogmoft am I the jerk because I want my wife to  drink my tea less so like any family we drink more   than just water my wife buys Crystal Light to put  in all her water buys those sugar-free carbonated   ice drinks currently has two ollipop sodas in the  fridge and some ginger ale I don't like carbonated   drinks so I really just stick to water and tea  we buy liter bottles of a few Japanese tea drinks   as well as when I can find it a milk tea drink  that's a relatively rare find this is my favorite   treat drink my wife has full rain of all the other  drinks in the fridge including my tea but she gets   very mad at me when I ask her to save the milk  tea for me though I'm not really enforcing any   kind of hard Rule and I always let her have a few  sips when I get a glass if she doesn't have one   as well today when I got home I could see she had  a glass of it she left it on the counter and then   just now she asked me to get her another glass  of it I said she's drinking more of it than I   am and she absolutely raked me over the coals for  it calling me selfish and a brat that she likes   it too and that I can't have it all to myself I  feel like she has all these drinks and I really   only have the teas and one that we can't stock  with any kind of frequency is my favorite soft   drink she had already drank about two to three  times more of the tea in the carton than I have   am I being unreasonable about this or should she  be more receptive to my requests I think if you   want to try to come to an agreement where you go  50 50. I think that makes sense but for you to say   oh it's my favorite so don't drink it you know  this is mine well frankly that's honestly just   kind of selfish do you think it's fair to lay  dibs to something that's your absolute favorite   when the other side does like it it might not be  their favorite but they do want some let me know   what you guys think down in the comments our next  story is from realistic n465 am I the jerk for   shaving my baby's unibrow I have a baby girl who  has a very thick unibrow of course I think she's   beautiful including her bushy little brow but  I'm so tired of the comments from other people   literally on a daily basis people tell me I should  dress her up as Frida Kahlo for Halloween jokingly   asked if she has a cat caterpillar on her face  tell me dad must be really hairy Etc nobody seems   to notice anything about her except that unibrow  so I shaved a little separation into her brow I   used a tiny little facial razor that's very gentle  on skin and made sure to take care of her skin   afterwards it didn't cause any sort of irritation  or issues and I've continued to do it every   week or so my husband finally noticed I did it  initially about a month ago and demanded to know   how I could possibly do something like that to our  child he's angry with me because one I didn't run   it by him first two I'm going to give her body  image issues and three there's nothing wrong   with a unibrow I told him when she's old enough to  voice her opinions she can tell me what she wants   but until then I'm going to keep shaving it so  that people notice more than just her unibrow he   told me to post it on here to prove to me that  I'm the jerk to me I think op is not the jerk   honestly they're looking out for their own sanity  if any thing because I think honestly unibrows are   something that people seem to just there's no off  limits about talking about it to me I think this   is no different than choosing different clothes  for your baby or cutting their hair if need be or   styling it stuff like that our next story is from  Grandpa stranger am I the jerk for treating my   grandpa Like a Stranger at a family event so I and  my three siblings and nine cousins have a grandpa   that's not really around for most of us around 10  years ago he decided he only wanted to spend time   with two specific grandkids the children of his  favorite daughter he doesn't speak to the rest of   us unless we're at an event and even then he  barely says anything last time we saw him he   was at a wrestling tournament he went to watch my  cousin and left as soon as my brother's name was   called for his match so it feels pretty deliberate  that he doesn't talk to us for reference I'm the   oldest grandchild at 20 the rest are all between  5 and 17. anyways my brother had this idea that   the next time we saw him at an event we we should  just act like we don't know him he never remembers   who we are anyways I thought it would be funny so  last week was one of my cousin's birthdays one of   the cousins he likes and he was there he didn't  interact with us for most of the party but towards   the end of it he came up to myself and my sister  and said hello I said oh hey your ex's Grandpa   right it's so nice to meet you he looked confused  and said well yes but aren't you Wise Kids I   responded with we are are you related to her or  something you look kind of like her Grandpa but he   hasn't spoken to us in years he was visibly pissed  and called me disrespectful before stomping off   most of the family thinks what I did was funny and  not a huge deal but his wife and the parents of my   cousins his faves are super pissed at me his wife  told me this will ensure he never speaks to us   again Fun by me I don't really care that he's mad  at me but was this a really big jerk thing to do I   thought it was pretty tame as far as Joe Oaks go  but clearly people disagree with me I think op's   not the jerk I put myself an OP situation and this  is a family member who didn't care about me didn't   come to visit me chose to only spend time with  his special favorites well then to me that person   might as well be a stranger you might as well  treat them like a Stranger by the way if you're   enjoying these stories make sure to hit those like  And subscribe buttons down below so you never miss   any of my daily videos every single video has  awesome stories like our next story from keybar   9915 am I the jerk for telling my son that being  a nerd doesn't mean that he's Superior to anyone   especially his little sister I have two kids Jake  and Jamie Jake is 16 year old male and big into   the media I like is my entire personality and I'm  better than you because I like those things and   has grown up to be very judgmental cold and mean  we honestly don't know how this happened but his   nasty attitude comes out the most at his little  sister Jaime is 14 year old female and is a very   bubbly friendly girl she makes friends with  everyone everywhere she goes and is also kind   of a mini trendsetter for her school she started  selling homemade scrunchies at school and it took   off Jake makes fun of her all the time for being  vapid girly Etc so my husband talked to him about   misogyny because we were both shocked on where  that came from we thought the issue was handled   and he started to be nicer to Jaime until the last  week of school Jamie came home from school having   won an award for the scrunchie business we were  proud of her and had tacos her favorite for dinner   mind you if Jake did something like that we'd do  the same we love to celebrate their successes well   Jake was pissy at dinner and interrupted a talk  about his video game accomplishments we were all   very polite and listened and congratulated him he  looked at his sister and was like and I did that   myself without having to make everyone else hear  about it all the time and dressing up like a pygmy   to get everyone's attention I just looked at my  husband then Jake and said being a nerd doesn't   make you Superior to anyone in this family Jake  you can like video games and still be a nice   person to your family especially your little  sister quit acting like a little snot he got   a red in the face and took his little tantrum  upstairs to his room since then he's barely   talked to anyone and just holes up in his room  playing games all day my husband did tell me that   I shouldn't have said that because it's going to  pit them against each other more even though Jaime   doesn't get why her brother treats her like this  am I the jerk I think Opie's not the jerk here   personally I think the behavior this kid learned  either from being in circles on the Internet or   in school is very concerning I would hope maybe  you could control their internet usage a little   bit more I'm not saying spy on them but I have  a feeling they're probably in some group chat   or game group or a Discord or something or maybe  even just hanging out on like a 4chan Forum where   you get like a hive mind of misogyny and a general  hatred for like normies or something I would say   therapy and limiting internet access is the go-to  here honestly I feel like social media as a whole   is just been horrendous for the mental psyche of  millions of people young and old our next story   is from crackhead sexual am I the jerk for telling  my parents to return my meds or I'll file a police   report I 21 year old male had a surgical removal  of a cyst this afternoon mine had a pretty nasty   infection so it had to be removed ASAP I went to  the hospital with my fiance 19 year old male and   my parents 62 year old male and 57 year old female  everything went very smoothly thankfully but as   my parents were driving me and my fiance back to  our apartment we got into a discussion about the   medication I was prescribed now my parents are  paranoid when it comes to anything addictive I   don't blame them I'm aware that hydrocodone is  incredibly addictive and I'm wary of it myself   they should have told me that I shouldn't take  it at all and just take Tylenol and ibuprofen   I told them I'd rather have the medication I was  prescribed just in case my pain got bad once the   hospital meds wore off I wasn't allowed to drive  after my surgery so they were supposed to pick up   my medication for me well they did but with two of  my Hydrocodone pills missing well that's fishy and   annoying I texted my mom basically asking where  the pills went she didn't respond so I kind of   forced it by telling her I'd have to report the  pharmacist if it wasn't her she said I took the   other two and I took them because that's all you  can legally have and drive fiance to work tomorrow   and then okay wow I had set money aside for him  to be able to get an Uber tomorrow if he needed   to anyways which she would have known had she  talked to me about it or even brought up these   concerns at all I was pissed I texted this huge  paragraph that was basically saying either give   them back or I'm filing a police report that's  stealing hydrocodone is a felony that I understand   her fear but this was absolutely not the way to  go about it 40 minutes later I get a we're here   text and a pounding on my door I waddle over and  open and my parents are standing in the doorway   pissed as freak my dad starts talking about how it  was absolutely not okay to threaten legal action   and that I needed to apologize he said it was his  fault that no one talked to me about it that he's   sorry but then goes on about a five minute rant of  how I have an addictive personality I was a smoker   when I was 18 and smoke weed how he's concerned  for me how he would never use the law against me   that the surgeon is giving them out like candy and  that he's heard a lot of cases of people getting   addicted to these and didn't want to risk it I  said that being concerned wasn't the issue he   couldn't take away my say on the situation he  couldn't just steal pills from me just because   he's scared at the very least he should discuss  his concerns with me like an adult he did not   like that he played this game of keep away with  the bottle holding it out to me and then yanking   it away to say more to me just kept arguing I got  them back after a lot of fighting am I wrong here   I need to know I didn't overreact am I the jerk  I think it's great the parents are concerned they   don't want anything to happen to their kid but  I think op is definitely not the jerk here I put   myself in that situation and I think I would  do the exact same thing because that's just   not okay honestly chances are you might not  even need that medication but God forbid if   you end up needing it it sure is nice to have it  imagine op has miserable pain and they run out of   medication because their parents got cold feet  and kept two of them for themselves I think op   shouldn't let the parents ever try to bully them  or Gaslight them about this I think Ops totally   in the right here this next story is from low ad  1414 am I the jerk for intentionally drinking at   family events so I'm not forced to babysit I 30  year old male and the only one of my siblings   without children this is a personal choice for  many reasons I won't get into my parents live   with my sister who's nine years older and has  two kids I see often however my brother two   years older has a young girl and two little boys  all three are very likely on the Spectrum but my   brother and his wife refuse to check through a  doctor they're also homeschooled in a very rural   area and I don't get to see my brother and his  family very often maybe once a year every time   I do spend time with my brother and his family  it never fails that he finds a way to dump his   three kids on me who may have special needs the  second he can so him and his wife can disappear   from the kids area I really only see my brother  during large family events the kids usually have   their own separate area to play and eat away from  the adults smoking cigarettes and drinking Etc so   they can socialize and Let it Loose so to speak  my brother's three kids don't leave the house   very much almost never they live on a big farm  so when they go to these kinds of events they're   over the top excited and harder to manage and one  is non-verbal but constantly walks around looking   to play with literally deadly things so needless  to say I'm not qualified or even capable to watch   my brother's three kids by myself as well as they  need plus their cousins my sister's kids also want   to spend time with their cousins so I'm sitting  there by myself watching five kids aged four to   eight by myself three of which may have special  needs one is a freaking monster don't at me and   because I'm the cool Uncle I gave them a Nintendo  switch for my own peace of mind my brother assumes   every time I'll just watch his freak trophies  it's gotten so blatant on my brother's end that   lately at family events my brother will give me a  physical paper list of Parental duties a backpack   with stuff for the kids then turn his phone off  in front of me then walk away after dumping his   kids on me I go to these family events to spend  time with my whole family not to be an isolated   babysitter I love my nieces and nephews but this  is one of the reasons I didn't have children in   my 20s family events are just as important to  me as other parents there and they can manage   to watch their own kids but my brother always  finds a way to ditch me with his kids then   ultimately my sister's kids join in too I don't  go to these family events to be a babysitter so   I've just started drinking a bit before I show  up and drink a little bit consistently enough to   safely say I shouldn't have five small children  in my care since these times are really the only   times my brother sees me he thinks I'm a drunk and  spreading rumors as such so I think Ops not the   jerk here but I also feel like they're probably  going about this the wrong way like like it does   work but it also does look bad and you really have  to feel like you need to get drunk to actually   enjoy a family event every single time I mean I  imagine a lot of people might because they hate   their family but Opie clearly wants to enjoy it  they shouldn't have to drink they should just be   honest and be blunt and if they try to continue  to drop the kids off on you you put your hands   up and you walk away if that makes you a jerk  then I guess your whole family is going to tear   into you for not just being babysitter Uncle this  next story is from calm hurry8589 am I the jerk   for telling a fellow mother of a special needs  child that my daughter is not responsible for   her child I have two children who will call Maria  14 year old female and David seven-year-old male   David's on the autism spectrum he's non-vocal  and requires a fair bit of Specialized Care   since his birth Maria's had to take on a partial  caring role for David for a variety of reasons   I make sure that this is not to an extent where  she's taking care of him however just enough so   that she can help out while not losing on her own  life and experiences as a child unfortunately this   doesn't always work out as intended and sometimes  Maria does have to step up when I and my husband   fail but I always make sure to make it up to her  and reward her for the time she helps us out like   I normally would a paid caretaker this summer I  enrolled Maria in a summer art program she'd been   looking forward to it for months and was ecstatic  on the first day this enthusiasm quickly turns   sour and she stopped wanting to go after only  the first two weeks this was because Maria was   essentially assigned to watch over a girl we'll  call Helen Helen is a girl who is also on the   autism spectrum I know Helen's mother personally  and when she learned that her daughter and mine   were going to be in the same art classes over  the summer she asked the organizers personally to   essentially assign Maria to be Helen's mandatory  friend over the summer over the first two weeks   Maria was essentially burdened with Helen she  spent a good chunk of the class time helping   Helen out with her own projects instead of being  able to work on her own she also at one point had   to help one of the teachers out when Helen began  to have an anxiety attack and did not get to do   any art the entire day when I learned of this I  was a livid I contacted the organizers of the art   program and went off demanding my money back and  threatening to report them for having a student   and a minor at that responsible for the care of  a special needs child they let it slip to me that   Helen's mother told them that I and her were close  friends which is not the case I called Helen's   mother up as well and went off demanding to know  where she got the nerve to ruin my child's own   experience and treat her like a caretaker for her  own child she claimed that Helen wanted to do the   art program but she was afraid that she wouldn't  be able to do it alone that Maria had experience   with special needs children and that she felt  safe with her being next to Helen's side she then   yelled at me called me a heartless jerk and said  that I should know where she was coming from I got   my money back Monday and I'm looking into private  art tutoring options for Maria when my husband   learned what happened he lost it said I should be  understanding of Helen's mother considering our   own situation so now I'm second guessing myself  I think Ops definitely not the jerk here while   in both situations you could say yeah they're  helping out somebody that's on the Spectrum it's   not even remotely the same thing this is something  that op's daughter is going to for their fun for   summer I'm sorry but they have no personal tie  to Helen they have no responsibility for Helen   and it is just not fair to Maria to try to saddle  them with taking care of Helen because they have   experience I think it's just a ridiculous notion  I mean I feel bad for Helen but it's not Maria's   responsibility and definitely not at the cost  of their experience this next story is from   throwaway aita 280 4 am I the jerk for wanting  my adult step-daughter 18 to move out so small   backstory my husband and his daughter moved into  my house back in 2016. I was more than happy for   my stepdaughter Aaron to move in since she doesn't  get on with her own mother me and my husband have   a child of our own now who's now five Aaron and  my son get along so well and she's amazing with   him but sometimes I get a little jealous about the  bond they have my son will only want to be hugged   by her or spend his time with her he even stopped  wanting me to read him a story at night and says   he likes the way Aaron does it better I admit  this makes me jealous but it's not the reason I   want her out like my husband keeps thinking is  the reason we recently found out we're having   another child and since her home only has three  bedrooms there just won't be enough room I want to   turn Aaron's room into a nursery room since it's  my house I thought my husband would understand   that I want my room back as I was nice enough to  let her stay here for six years she's 18 now and   legally an adult so I don't feel any guilt about  asking her to leave her College doesn't have any   accommodation so she lives here while at college  so I understand it would be difficult for her to   find a place to stay she could even move back in  with her own mother while she looks for a place   my husband is mad at my decision and is calling me  a jerk and saying if she goes then he goes too I   don't want to lose him too but I feel like this is  my decision not his I've not told Aaron about this   yet but I'm planning too soon so I can get on with  decorating before I physically can't I'm worried   she'll think I'm a jerk too since I still want a  relationship with her so please help me am I the   jerk it's so nice that op out of the kindness of  their heart let a 12 year old stay in their house   for the next six years I hope he wasn't like  those cruel-hearted people that kicked their   kids out at 12 and I don't really understand why  op felt the need to include a paragraph about how   they're jealous of her other than like trying to  justify kicking them out because you're you're   jealous of her I don't know it sounds to me like  despite living there from 12 years old and over   the course of six years that you never really  developed any kind of relationship and honestly   you don't really care that much about her because  most parents if they cared wouldn't kick their kid   out even at 18. especially while they're attending  college and they literally probably cannot afford   anywhere else our next story is from ta wife work  35 am I the jerk for telling my wife she needs to   find another job me 26 year old male and my wife  24 year old female have been married for four   years during those four years she had the same job  which requires her to be away Friday to Sunday so   she leaves early on Friday and returns about 4 or  5 p.m on Sunday occasionally it would be leaving   on Saturday and returning Sunday she also has to  work some of the school and public holidays I work   full time and get just a bit above minimum wage in  tips so our bills are split 60 her and 40 me while   I find myself struggling with money and having  to borrow from the joint bank account my wife has   never had this problem I know she's getting paid  more than I do as she wears for a high profile   client but I'm not sure by how much more she also  wouldn't tell me exactly what she's doing all I   know is that it's connected to her degree and it's  100 not a sex work or nothing in that industry the   reason why she won't tell me is because she signed  the contract and it's highly confidential so she's   not allowed to go into details she does chores  around the house but doesn't cook she admits   herself she's a bad cook and hates it instead she  would order either those pre-made healthy meals   you then heat up for herself or take away when I'm  home then she hasn't ordered she'll order for me   too so most of the day while I'm working she's  either in our house chilling watching TV playing   video games reading or exercising or shopping  or in the gym over the years I got annoyed with   this and I've asked her to find another job so  she has something to do you while I'm working   instead of wasting her day she told me she is not  wasting her day but relaxing and her job pays her   enough so she can afford the lifestyle she wants  I said it's not fair on me as I come home tired   while she's done nothing all day to which she  said I can find another job or a different job   but I'm a jerk for wanting her to find another  job because I feel tired when coming back from   my work when she already has a job she loves after  she won't talk to me I've spoken to my family and   while my parents agree with me that she needs to  work my sisters took my wife's side and called me   a massive jerk I would agree with the sisters  I think it's just unreasonable to ever expect   anybody to just give up a job that they love and  a job that pays them well if their schedule they   have because of the work they do is something that  is just not functional for op that I think this is   an OP problem and maybe a relationship issue  stemming from P side because clearly the wife   loves their work and they have no issues it might  just be an incompatibility thing but to sit there   and insist that she needs to get a different  job or quit because it makes you upset I don't   think it's reasonable and I think it makes Opie  The Jerk honestly it sounds to me like Ops just   upset that they're not working a job that leaves  them as miserable as op does so they're expecting   their wife to quit and find one that does uh no  sorry and our final story of the day is from Green   toad am I the jerk for asking my girlfriend to not  embarrass herself by bringing up shameful stuff at   a dinner party with my Company CEO my girlfriend  had a kind of rough upbringing and now she turned   out a really successful she's also probably the  most self-confident and self-assured person I know   which I really admire but just once in a while  she says stuff that's socially uncomfortable for   example we were going to a dinner and my friend  kept apologizing for her messy car my girlfriend   said girl I grew up in a hoarder house and I'm  in the middle of shoveling crap out of that house   there's nothing on earth that could disgust me  anymore and while that's true it was kind of an   uncomfortable overshare another time her co-worker  was talking about how their kid was really shy and   she didn't know how to help my girlfriend was like  give her time I'm sure she'll grow into herself I   didn't talk to anyone in school literally like  I had no friends if you'll believe it one last   time my girlfriend and I were at a networking  event and one of my co-workers joked about how   my girlfriend should enjoy grabbing thirds of  food when she's young because she can't eat   like that forever without missing a beach he  said oh I don't think about food restriction   like that anymore it's an eating disorder trigger  anyway I'm trying to bulk up anyway we had a big   argument about it we were invited to a dinner  at my company's CEO's house this coming weekend   along with a few Piers I asked her not to share  anything uncomfortable there she asked what what   I meant and I gave her the same examples I told  her that that kind of shamelessness about stuff   most people find shameful is awkward she was like  but it's not really shameful like I got over that   self-hating crap and renovating and flipping a  house so many of your co-workers talk about that   I said it wasn't the house flipping it was the  fact that it was her family home and it was a   hoarder house and it was weird to shamelessly talk  about having no friends in an eating disorder she   was like that stuff's in the past why would I be  insecure now I got exasperated and asked her to   just not share stuff that most people would  be embarrassed to say at the dinner and she   got angry and said that it sounded like I thought  her whole life is embarrassing so she should shut   up I said no just talk about current stuff like  you just got a promotion travel to Europe bought   your dream car and she snapped at me but I'm also  still shoveling cat piss thinking garbage every   every day so it sounds like you're embarrassed  of me screw you for saying I should have more   shame I'm darn proud of myself it sounds like  you're the one ashamed I'm still worried about   how this dinner party will go and I'm questioning  whether I screwed up by saying something am I the   jerk for asking my girlfriend to not embarrass  herself at a dinner party with my Company CEO   I think op better apologize and apologize quick  and hope they forgive them because I think this   girlfriend's mindset is super awesome for them  to basically look Opie in the face and say screw   you I'm darn proud of myself and it sounds like  you're the one ashamed which is true is awesome   NOP better hope that a person that awesome  forgives them but with that being said that's   all the time we have for today now if you want to  hear another am I the jerk here story that was way   crazier than any of the ones in this video click  on that left video or if you missed my latest   video check out the one on the right that said  I'll see you all next time with some more stories

Channel: Storytime

Views: 216,804

Keywords: storytime, story time, life stories, r/maliciouscompliance, r/idontworkherelady, r/entitledparents, r/entitled parents, entitled parents, maliciouscompliance, malicious compliance, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, r/pro revenge, reddit stories, funny reddit stories

Id: OP5T7xrkQ2E

Length: 239min 40sec (14380 seconds)

Published: Thu Oct 05 2023