Best of r/AITA 2023 - Reddit Stories

Welcome Friends to another r/ am I the jerk Here  video would you be the jerk for not wanting to   take a DNA test well find out but first a  story from mean coconut 541 am I the jerk   for humiliating my wife on social media to defend  my mom we have finally got no contact with my mom   it was a long hard decision but she and my wife  are just fundamentally unable to get along and   recently had a vicious fight and I knew I had  to put my wife first this fight was so bad my   mom didn't even protest the no contact we're  just done with each other but I can't say it   hasn't been gut-wrenching my mom's given her  version of the story to everyone so I get my   wife wants to defend herself but I hate that she's  posting on social media because I find that tacky   and my mom just told people verbally anyway my  wife made a couple posts about my mom's behavior   over the years which hey they were true but then  she claimed my mom wore white to our wedding she   didn't and she posted a picture to prove it the  picture isn't from our wedding it's from my mom's   own wedding and my wife labeled it the mothers son  dance I was mortified I don't even care about the   white dress but the man my mom was with was her  husband not me face was cropped out and I felt   humiliated he was holding her very intimately hand  on her lower back her head buried in his chest   my mom and I would never touch like that and it  made me feel ick heck my mom was stiff during the   actual mothers Sun dance I know some families are  more affectionate but I would just never do that   I asked my wife to take it down and she refused  I took it into my own hands and commented honey   I think you're confused that's stepdad's name  remember that was their wedding she actually wore   green to ours and posted the pictures for proof  my wife was Furious and deeply hurt she broke   down crying instead I publicly humiliated her and  sided with my my mom she said she just wanted a   little bit of petty revenge and I should have  taken her side it's been a day and she's still   clearly upset so I think op's not the jerk here  I'm not one for the whole misinformation Petty   Revenge attack would you guys agree with me when  I say just based off of the reactions here that   maybe the whole disagreement is more a problem  generated from the wife and maybe not the mom or   do you think it's going too far to try to suggest  the wife might be the one at fault for all this   fighting just based off of how they reacted let  me know what you guys think in the comments down   below our next story is from automatic effort 2227  am I the jerk I told my daughter she can live with   me with this condition I 34-year-old male had a  child 10 years ago Nova 10 I was a terrible person   back then I didn't stay in her life and I deeply  regret it a few months ago I contacted her mom to   see if I can see my child she happily agreed to  co-parent with me and seemed relieved which was   understandable considering she had four other kids  all younger than Nova Nova was a bit distant at   first but now we're doing better she's generally  a very good kid but something I realized about   her is that no punishment seems to work on her  and also she can be very disrespectful at times   if I tell her to do something as a punishment she  won't do it or if I ground her she'll just leave   without my permission I asked her mom how she  punishes her and she said she's never punished   her before what I've heard from Nova is that it  seems like she would just cuss her out and yell   at her which I don't think are good punishments  for a kid two nights ago Nova asked me if she   can live with me from now on I told her I'd love  it but she can live with me with one condition   she has to follow my rules and be respectful she  didn't say anything after that after she went back   to her mom's home my mom who was there when Nova  asked me this told me I was a jerk because if if   a kid is asking her deadbeat dad to take her in  there must be something very wrong so you don't   make conditions for her you just say yes and take  her in was I really wrong to have this condition   I can't be a parent if she doesn't listen to  me but now both my mom and daughter refused   to talk to me her mom will likely have no problem  with this she seems too busy with her other kids   and I think she would like being the weekend fun  parents so that's not really a problem I think op   is the jerk here because first of all they're 10  years old what kind of rambunctious disrespectful   Behavior are you really expecting second of all I  think it was wholly unnecessary because the kinds   of things Opie was asking of a 10-year-old kid  it's kind of implied already when you live with   a parent follow rules and be respectful isn't  that what kids are supposed to do that's not   something you have to sign up for that's should  be expected and also it's your 10-year-old kid   they're turning to you for a reliable place to  live and your first response to your 10-year-old   kid is well you could work out if you follow some  rules it comes off like you just don't care this   next story is from throwa 6977 57 am I the jerk  for calling my husband selfish and saying no to   the arrangements he made I female 33 have been  married to my husband male 38 for 2 years he has   a 99-year-old son from his former marriage he's  always been on bad terms with his ex they had a   messy divorce and basically hate each other 's  guts it got worse after his ex got remarried the   current problem started when he found out that his  ex-wife planned to go on vacation without their   son my stepson why because her new husband didn't  want him to go probably because it's a romantic   getaway my husband pitched a fit and insisted they  take my stepson but she refused my husband then   brought him to stay with us not his days but I  welcomed him and made sure to keep him entertained   and happy all was good until I found out that my  husband husband has booked tickets for a vacation   to the same places ex and her new husband were  going same Hotel same everything he booked the   tickets in mine and his son's name only I was  confused I asked him about it and he said he did   this despite his ex and show her that she can't  exclude his son from a vacation and who the better   parent is he told me he's arranged for everything  and all I had to do was take time off work and   take his son and go I was shocked at and I asked  if he was serious and he confirmed it I went off   on him saying I can't just take time off work and  go with his son to a place I've never been before   just so he could one up his ex he ranted about  how busy he was otherwise he would have taken   care of this himself but sent me instead I yelled  saying I've got a lot on my plate I work full-time   I take care of my cancer stricken mom I clean cook  and take care of my stepson on top of that he said   my boss will understand if I take time off unlike  his but in response I called him selfish and said   no to this Arrangement and told him it was final  he flipped his crap on me then told his son that   I just said no to a fun vacation for him funded  by his dad I told him to stop it because I hate   commitments and won't risk losing my job over an  unexpected vacation and for what we just got back   from one a month ago he's been ranting about how  I'm wasting his time and money by declining to go   and that his son will hate me for this forever  I don't care what this husband thinks what   justification he has you can't just force a trip  upon somebody especially one that has real serious   commitments and expect them to ever just be truly  happy with it it could be tickets to their dream   vacation spot with all expenses included Hotel  and Spa and everything beautiful and they would   still be justified to be angry and upset because  who has the ability to just drop everything at   a dime take time off work immediately and set  sail the husband absolutely wasted their money   and they should feel bad about it by the way if  you're enjoying these stories make sure to hit   those like And subscribe buttons down below so  you never miss any of my daily videos our next   story is from next leadership 2388 am I the jerk  for mocking my annoying coworker after she'd been   in an accident I have a coworker Hannah who hates  the fact that I come to work by car every time I   mention traffic parking or I'm a little late she  goes why don't you bike to work instead or should   have taken the tram it's immune to traffic the  bike park has plenty of space Etc it's incredibly   annoying and she always does this a few days ago a  car turned on Hannah while she was riding her bike   to work and she suffered some very minor injuries  nothing serious just a broken arm and a concussion   our team put together a little present for her  everybody wrote a note and another cooworker   delivered it to Hannah's apartment my note said  should have come by car I thought it was a funny   joke but apparently not it got delivered to her  and she told the others who came to me and called   me Petty and insensitive and are now acting very  cold towards me I think they're overreacting it   was just a joke am I the jerk I think Opie is  definitely the jerk honestly if you're trying   to joke there you have to make sure that you are  actually that close to that person like just put   yourself in her shoes if you're driving your  car and you crash or something accidentally and   they send you a Getwell note that says told you  you should have used a bike would that be funny   Would you be laughing you'd probably want to rip  their head off also everybody agrees with me when   I say a broken arm and a concussion are not very  minor injuries right Opie was crazy in labeling   that right A traumatic brain injury very minor our  next story is from impressive PP am I the jerk for   telling a neighborhood Runner I wouldn't leash  my dog we live in country suburbs neighborhood   is surrounded by Farmland the neighborhood is  full of transplants in the tech industry the   neighborhood is brand new still building houses  we have a golden who is incredibly well trained   and walks no more than 3 ft ahead of us or beside  we were walking towards the fields to play fetch   and a man started running towards us he stops  a few feet away and asks us to leash our dogs   we said no thank you he said what if I was  afraid of dogs what if if I was allergic I   said well then you shouldn't be sprinting towards  an Unleashed dog he didn't like that answer and I   explained to him that we're essentially in the  country and he is trained to be off leash and   it's very clear that he would never hurt anybody  because he's a stranger who's raising his voice   and our dog hasn't reacted whatsoever sitting  pretty by our side he told me I must be having   a bad day I calmly said not at all I told you  no we won't be putting him on a leash and you   you aren't getting your way he threatened calling  the HOA I laughed and told him to take my picture   while he's at it and I'll give him my address  as a huge dog lover I've had dogs all my life   I would say confidently op is the jerk the bottom  line I feel is it doesn't matter how well trained   your dog truly is they should be on a leash when  you're outside they're trained but there's still   an animal you just don't know if there's going to  be one bad day and especially if some something   frightening happens your dog might be very very  well trained to come right back to you but one   crazy thing happens pandemonium some wild animal  comes chasing and that dog is gone bottom line   it might be annoying but it's just better to put  a leash on your dog and walk them around safely   you can get a leash that lets your dog go 3 ft  from you just get one of those long super long   retractable ones if you need our next stories  from Thunder deserve 9096 am I the jerk for   not paying to remove well on my property so the  neighbor can replace the septic tank my husband   and I would like to get another point of view  regarding an issue we're having with our next   door neighbor little background we're cordial  but not friends we bought our house 8 years ago   they maybe 14 they own a construction landscaping  company and have trucks and workers coming on our   residential street daily I assumed to pick  up work orders over the years they've done   extensive Landscaping to their backyard using our  sidey yard to get there because they built a huge   deck so close to the property line absolutely  gorgeous Landscaping in the last 2 years they   started to work on an adjacent sidey yard and we  noticed they planted small Palms in front of our   sprinklers long story short they thought they had  approximately six to eight more feet than they had   this came to light when they moved our sprinklers  over and we said something about them planting in   front of them the neighbor approached husband a  few weeks ago that they needed a new septic tank   and our unpermitted well was within 50 ft and  would need to be moved hubby says we'll move it   for you if you pay for it she says well it may be  an issue since you don't have a permit we make a   few calls our realtor makes a few calls for us to  septic coowner it's a small town and she tells us   that they can apply for a variance it had to have  been permitted etc etc we aren't worried neighbor   knocks on our door and hubby and I speak to her  she asks if there's any way we can work with her   and her husband because yes they can apply for  a variance but it costs $1800 and there's no   guarantee that the county will approve it she asks  if we can just move our well hubby says we will   if you pay for it she says she shouldn't have to  since we don't have a permit this is where I may   have been a jerk I did raise my voice and told  her we weren't paying for anything you're trying   to make your problem our problem she said it was  our problem because the county now knows we don't   have a permit so they may make us move it we said  we talked to some people and we weren't worried   and I again said your problem not ours stop trying  to make it our problem she said we may bring legal   action we said do what you have to do and slam  the door we found our copy of the permit that   the former owners left us by the way her passive  aggressive threat of the permit pissed me off and   I did raise my voice to her so am I the jerk for  raising my voice to neighbor absolutely not a jerk   this person was doing exactly what op said they  were trying to make it their problem honestly   I think the only thing that truly sucks here is  they have to live next to a neighbor who's clearly   going to be biased and have hatred for them for  not spending x amount of hundreds of dollars to   move the septic tank for them if you want your  neighbors to move something that costs hundreds   so you can continue to do some Home Improvement  crap well tough crap unless you pay for it this   next story is from gonan am I the jerk for telling  my sister it's ridiculous to divorce someone who   gave her a fake ring I 23-year-old female have  an older sister 29-year-old female who's married   to my brother-in-law my brother-in-law seems to  genuinely love her and they've never shown a sign   of a failing relationship that was of course until  yesterday when my sister phoned me while crying   heavily I asked her what was wrong and she told  me her friend who was a jeweler was suspicious of   the Ring my brother-in-law gave to her and urged  her to confirm the material of the Ring my sister   continued and told me that the results showed  that the ring was not made from Diamond but in   fact moite she told me she didn't tell her husband  yet but she's considering a divorce because she   thought that my brother-in-law didn't really love  her even though he has supposedly had enough money   I don't know how much money he has so as of now  I can't really confirm if he did or did not have   the money I told her it was pretty ridiculous  to only divorce brother-in-law just because   he bought her a fake ring she sarcastically told  me something along the lines of thanks for being   so helpful before hanging up I get she was in  an emotional moment but love shouldn't revolve   around a ring am I the jerk I don't think op's the  jerk here I think honestly for the brother-in-law   it might be for the best that they get a divorce  because clearly their love is not based on true   love you didn't get me a real diamond well I'm  divorcing you the only thing that sucks there   are probably going to try to take half the money  that brother-in-law does have this next story is   from easy and free am I the jerk for asking my  parents and in-laws to leave our wedding early   I officially tied the knot last week not sure how  but I convinced the coolest guy in the world that   I'm tolerable enough to tie down for life super  shocking thankfully everyone accommodated the   fact that we didn't want children present at our  ceremony or reception the thing that did receive   some push back was our request that unless you  were explicitly invited to stay then everyone   needed to be out of the reception venue by 700  p.m. those who were asked to stay were mostly   just mine and my husband's friends as much as  I love my parents siblings and new in-laws I   did want to partake in a few adult substances and  wasn't really interested in them bearing witness   to poppers and other things getting past around  we'd been with them all day and would be seeing   them the next morning as all of us were staying  at a place nearby and had plans to grab breakfast   together so I didn't see it as a problem at that  point I'd already had a few drinks so after some   back and forth about whether they really had to  head out I basically said something to the effect   of if you wouldn't feel comfortable spending  a night out with us at a gay bar you should   probably leave the space cleared out pretty  quickly after that and we did our thing with   our friends it was a wonderful end to a wonderful  night my dad however didn't show up for breakfast   the next morning and my sister tipped me off that  my mom and my mother-in-law weren't happy with   my comments am I the jerk I mean I'm all for you  having the wedding of your dreams and whatnot but   I just feel like it's a weird process to kick  everybody out and essentially make all these   people feel like they're not close enough to you  or not important enough to hang around and frankly   the comments were a bit weird basically telling  everybody at the wedding sorry you didn't make   it on the VIP list kick rocks kind of painful  for a lot of people I bet imagine telling your   mom and dad on your wedding day to go home early  essentially our next story is from OK tutor 2934   am I the jerk for being pissed that my dad BR  his husband on our family trip I'm 15-year-old   female my dad 54-year-old male is married to  Jacob 50-year-old male and to be honest I don't   like Jacob as he just annoys me I don't know if  they intentionally do what they do or if they   they don't even realize that they're doing it  but either way it pisses me off which is why I   dislike Jacob very much I can never get aone time  with just my mom and my dad without Jacob being   there and I've specifically said all the time that  I just want my dad and my mom there but it doesn't   even matter to them because Jacob turns up either  way and yes I've communicated with them about this   but it's like they don't even listen anyways  yesterday was supposed to be only me my mom and   my dad going to an amusement park but also my half  sister 3-year-old female my mom's daughter I told   my dad and Jacob that I didn't want Jacob there  but guess what he turned up anyways also this   event was for me and it wasn't an event that was  for the whole family it was for me and I wanted   my sister my mom and my dad to be there only I was  pissed when Jacob turned up so instead of letting   it go like I normally do I lashed out at my dad  and Jacob for Jacob being there I told my dad that   Jacob didn't always need to come along and that he  needed to stop bringing Jacob to my events that I   specifically said I didn't want him to attend my  dad was poised and Jacob started crying which only   made me more mad Jacob is a grown man and I talked  to him about this as well so it's not like he was   just clueless to the whole thing so I didn't  understand why he was crying and maybe I was   a bit harsh when I lashed out but because I've  been gentle with this many many times and I was   just done with being gentle with them I lashed out  now to mention my mom is the one paying for all   this so she was also pissed that Jacob turned up  when he wasn't even supposed to be there I never   see my dad without Jacob being there and it just  gets so tiring when you can't even talk to your   dad alone with his husband/wife being there my  mom and family are completely on my side but my   dad and Jacob are pissed at me so am I the jerk  I think go op is not the jerk here I don't blame   op for wanting to have one-on-one time with just  their dad or a group moment with just their actual   parents the problem here is because Jacob is being  so insistent on always being there there's never   been any time for op to build up that feeling  that they're satisfied with how much one-on-one   time they've gotten with their dad so this is  only created more and more discontent and I feel   like it's hard to fix at this point Jacob needs to  give the 15-year-old girl some space and let them   have some one-on-one time with their dad this next  story is from please don't spend fxh am I the jerk   for not wanting to take a DNA test I'm 32-year-old  female my dad passed away when I was a wee baby   he was in a car accident with his pregnant female  subordinate who was also his longtime mistress she   did survive the crash but lost the baby and ended  up in an almost vegetative state she's still alive   my parents had me after 8 years of marriage after  dealing with years of infertility my dad was rich   he came from old money and while married in my  mother created his own fortune my mom came from   humble beginnings they had an arranged marriage  while they were married my dad was in charge   of the finances and when he died everything went  to my mom she married my dad's younger brother a   few years later and had my siblings they're still  happily married we had a very happy childhood and   my grandparents dad's parents who have since  passed were very involved I had an extremely   privileged upbringing now here's where I might be  the jerk a girl claiming to be my half sister my   dad's mistress's daughter has contacted me saying  that her mom is on her last legs and that she's   trying to get some money for the hospital bills  she's 2 years older than me and claims that she's   my dad's daughter and is entitled to my family's  money I have refused to take a DNA test she's   now threatened to take me to court I I refuse to  meet her or discuss this issue her family's now   harassing me about it and they tell me that I'm  trying to steal her money and that she's my dad's   firstborn child when I told my mom about this she  told me to ignore her and go on with my life am   I the jerk I think op is not the jerk here it's  honestly not their responsibility to take this DNA   test and frankly if they don't want to help out  somebody who they haven't known their whole life   they don't have any responsibility to do that even  if they were op father's kid all of that money   still would have gone to op's Mom it wouldn't have  like Piggy jumped their spouse and gone straight   to a kid but it wouldn't hurt to get some legal  advice just in case our next story is from Life   percentage 5567 am I the jerk for writing up an  employee who catfished me I'm a manager in a work   environment that's rather casual where employees  get close and spend a lot of time together outside   of work I'm a little traditional when it comes  to employer/employee relationships so while I do   participate in some activities to build morale and  camaraderie I.E happy hours after work attending   weddings if I'm invited Etc I do not participate  in social activities where things might get out of   hand I.E going to concerts clubbing just going to  someone's house to hang out Etc this is a personal   policy that I also extend to social media where I  keep my profiles private and I don't add or accept   employees on all platforms I just like to keep  things private and don't want them to see where I   spend my time who I'm dating Etc recently a new  hire asked me for my account and I kindly let   her know that I'd like to keep things private I  thought that was it but she went ahead and made a   fake account to follow me going as far as to post  fake photos and write a fake bio to look like we   went to college together I found out because after  I accepted her she took screenshots of my photos   and shared them to other colleagues thankfully  there wasn't anything off base on my accounts but   she did share photos of a new boyfriend I haven't  introduced yet as well as photos of a new designer   bag I purchased and jokingly asked everyone if  he was my sugar daddy it was a huge breach of   my privacy her comments also embarrassed me and  I ended up riding her up which is a semi-serious   offense at our workplace that can lead to  termination since then it's caused a huge   drama at work with some employees thinking that I  can't take a joke and that I was taking things too   far While others came to support me I hate that  it split up the team upper management supports my   decision but some employees have mentioned that I  could have just verbally warned her first and that   it was my own fault for falling for her catfish  am I the jerk I think op's clearly not the jerk   here and this isn't something that you laugh off  or give a verbal warning for they literally went   behind your back to lie to you as to who they are  so they can peer into your personal life and try   to invade on you that's not something something  you tolerate you slap down a ride up because that   is not okay you don't pry into someone's life just  cuz you're curious and then also show their photos   around and joke about having a sugar daddy and  embarrassing them as a person that enjoys their   privacy what that coworker did is ridiculous this  next story is from mucker 113 am I the jerk for   asking my wife to work after I told her she didn't  have to 16 years ago we got married in ' 06 we had   three kids and 3 years following and and I stated  to her that she can raise the kids while I work   now the kids are 10 14 and 15 and in school from  8:00 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. daily so I asked her to get   a part-time job to assist with a couple of our  bills she went off on me stating I lied when I   said she could be a stay-at-home mom when we got  married and her family and mine are agreeing with   her but I said it's getting to be a mental strain  on me financially since I've taken two pay cuts at   work and don't have the luxury of looking for new  employment I've even started doing food deliveries   on the weekends just to keep the two older kids  in sports programs and when my youngest asked to   do gymnastics and I saw the cost I said I can't  without sacrificing other required bills and now   she says if I can't afford a family Why Did I  Get Married I'm just at a loss as to what to do   I work from home and even offered my wife a job  with me part-time while the kids are in school   just to answer a few of my calls and transfer  them appropriately to the Departments they need   my family stated that I told her she doesn't have  to work but our needs have changed since the kids   require so much more money now than they did when  they were younger and now my wife hasn't spoken to   me in 2 weeks and both sides of the family agree  with her yeah it sucks that 16 years ago also   2006 being 16 years ago hurts me to hear but it  sucks that 16 years ago you said oh you're going   to be a stay-at-home mom you won't have to lift a  finger besides around the house and with with the   kids but stuff changes is this a marriage why  is the wife just tearing down op for admitting   that they need more help this doesn't seem like  a partnership to me she'd rather brutally put   down op than just try and make their kids' lives  better I fear that they're just going to drive   op to a Breaking Point and if they just give up  what's going to happen I hope both sides of the   family that are saying op's the total jerk and  is in the wrong here are going to be willing to   pitch in for that entire family and our final  story of the day from healthy Escape 1802 am I   the jerk for not wanting my atheist friend to  be religious around me this sounds strange but   I 17-year-old female have found a job recently  and I've quickly become friends with one of my   co-workers 19-year-old female Amy I'm Muslim but  my family aren't very strict Muslims and neither   am I Amy knows I'm Muslim and knows about some  of the general rules and stuff some of which I   don't follow lately Amy's been calling me out on  things I do saying that it's against my religion   I did tell her that I'm not a strict Muslim but  it hasn't stopped her normally I wear jeans and   hoodies to work but since it's been warm I wore  a skirt and Amy pointed out that I should be   covering my legs more but I just rolled my eyes  and then she saw me eating M&M's which are mostly   not Halal so she told me to stop eating them  I didn't and I told her that I wanted her to   stop policing me even my parents don't say this  stuff to me she said that she's just helping me   practice My Religion so I told her that she should  just practice it if she's going to keep correcting   me she told one of our other co-workers who says  that I was in the wrong because I was being rude   after she tried to help me am I the jerk I think  op's not the jerk here because they never asked   for any help maybe op should turn it around  on them the next time Amy Says something like   God I wish my shift was over Opie should say well  actually you're atheist so you don't even believe   in it so why are you saying that you know pick and  PR at them to be a better atheist maybe they'll   realize it's kind of ridiculous am I the jerk for  kicking my husband's mom out after she threw out   the dinner I cooked last night my husband's mom  came over at 7:00 p.m. I just got done making   dinner by the time she arrived to the house I  welcomed and greeted her then went upstairs to   take a shower my husband had to finish some work  in his office and then sit with her in the living   room 20 minutes later I got out of the shower and  rushed into the kitchen I was so confused refused   to see my pot not on the stove and another pot  put in its place my husband's mom was sitting   in the living room I approached her to ask about  it and she said that the pot that I left cooking   on the stove got burnt so she thought I must have  forgotten to turn off the stove resulting in the   food getting burned so she threw it out and made  us dinner I was shocked I went and dug through the   trash and as I'd expected the food was not burned  in fact it still wasn't cooked the meat was still   raw so apparently she threw it out for no reason  I lost my ever loving crap on her because this   isn't the first time not the second time but the  third time she'd had done this now y'all telling   me that this is a coincidence but I don't think so  I yelled at her saying that she never should have   touched my dinner that I spent time and effort  making and then lie about why she threw it out   just because she hates my cooking my husband got  involved and told me to take it easy because his   mom meant well I said no she didn't think told  her to leave my house right there and then she   argued then took her purse and left my husband  blew up saying he couldn't believe I kicked his   mom out for literally cooking us dinner I said  that there was already dinner cooking but she   threw it out and it wasn't even burned he called  me unhinged then went upstairs and then had the   whole dinner his mom cooked for himself I ended up  eating yogurt and dates for dinner which was awful   because I was starving my husband's upset because  of me kicking her out and says that I punished her   over a misunderstanding am I the jerk I think  op's not the jerk here usually I think when   you say don't mess with somebody's food you're  usually referring to putting something in the   food or spoiling it intentionally but I think it  also applies to don't go and toss somebody else's   food that they're currently cooking out let's  say you had a relative or a friend over and you   were cooking a meal for yourself and you stepped  away they threw out your meal and started cooking   something entirely different would you kick that  friend and or relative out of your house just a   hard argument just go along with it let me know  what you would do in the comments down below our   next story is from throwaway 468 692 am I the  jerk for asking my daughter to leave I divorced   my ex-wife 5 years ago together we have a daughter  14-year-old female and I have full custody a few   months ago my daughter started this new habit that  whenever we have an argument she would yell at me   tell me she hates me and would rather go and  live with her mom she hates her mom so I know   that she's only saying it to make me angry but it  started to get very annoying so 3 days ago when we   had an argument again and she said she doesn't  want to live with me anymore and she'd rather   live with her mom I told her to call her mom or  someone else and tell them to take her because if   this is really what she wants then I won't stop  her she seemed surprised and apologized and said   she doesn't want to go but I said she has to go a  few minutes later my sister called me and said my   daughter's ass to take her and asked me if I'd  really kicked my daughter out I told her I did   and asked her to come and take her she showed up  at my home an hour later and took my daughter last   night my daughter called me and apologized again  and asked me if she can come home now I told her I   love her but no this is what she wanted my sister  called me after that and called me a cruel jerk   and said my daughter is crying because of me my  original plan plan was to let her stay there for   a week I thought it would be a good punishment for  her but now I'm not so sure I remembered the sub   and decided to ask for some judgment so am I the  jerk no I'm not a parent and I'm not necessarily   saying that I know best I would say op is a  jerk right up until the daughter apologized   for the second time at the sister's house and they  said no to them coming back considering that was   their second apology and they were already over  there at their sister's house I feel like like   they sufficiently learned their lesson and I feel  like it's just kind of grinding it into the dirt   forcing them to stay there for even longer when  they're already clearly upset and apologizing   and realizing that you're not going to deal with  their attempt at manipulation our next story is   from powerful ad 2907 am I the jerk for picking my  daughter's career for her my daughter 17-year-old   female has always been a smart girl she has a  huge potential future available for her she has   the ability to become one of the greatest data  scientists ever it's an incredibly rewarding job   for her especially since technology is the way  to go for the future and the country we live in   is expensive as a computer scientist myself I've  always loved my job however she doesn't want to   be one I've been influencing her since she was  10 she was initially excited but doesn't want   to anymore she took two tech classes in grades 9  and 10 and she isn't taking one in or 12th grade   she says that she wants to be a psychologist and  now wants to have a business major I don't think   it's a right fit for her the former because she  doesn't have the social skills needed to become   a psychologist she's autistic heck she couldn't  handle her brothers well how she supposed to deal   with adults with psychological issues the latter  as well because it involves dealing with people   that can be immature as well also she took a  business course in grade 10 and she ended up   not liking it so why would she take an entire  University program yesterday we sat down and   were looking at potential programs she picked a  few from Bachelor of Commerce programs I tried   pushing her to pick the Bachelor of Computer  Science programs at the end she asked if I would   support her no matter what she picks I laughed  at her and told her not to give me a scare so   it's a no then she asked I told her that she can  take her highlighter highlight the programs she's   interested in and we can discuss she said that I  criticized every program that isn't Tech related   I tried convincing her that the tech field is a  very rewarding field and she's smart and capable   and then she snapped she said that she doesn't  care if it's a gold mine and she's capable enough   to handle it she hates the computer tech field  and I've been forcing her to do it for a long   time she says it's her future not mine and not  everyone wants to be a tech scientist she asked   how I feel if my father tried to push me to the  L law field since it's a rewarding job despite   me having no interest in social sciences then she  stormed out at that point I realized that I may   have pushed her too hard I just want her to have a  bright future and no struggles but I guess I want   about it the wrong way I think it's safe to say  here that op is the jerk and I think they've got   some blinders on as far as what the right thing  is for their own kid I actually appreciate how   much op wants a great future for their kid and  while it may seem like a Surefire thing to go   into the tech field it's not what they want to  do you have one go around with things and even   though they're 17 and still have a long time  to really figure it out I say let them pursue   what they're excited about especially if they can  make a career out of it and not only let them but   support them in it do you know how discouraging  it is for them to straight up ask you can I share   what I'm excited about or am interested in and  to be essentially told pretty much no unless   it's Tech related you're setting your daughter  up to never want to open up to you ever by the   way if you're enjoying these stories make sure to  hit those like And subscribe buttons down below   so you never miss any of my daily videos every  video has awesome stories like our next story   from Super pant man am I the jerk for refusing to  sleep in Sailor Moon bed sheets background I male   29 have been married to my wife female 28 for 5  years and we have a child together female too she   does all the housework occasionally I might lend  a hand but she cleans cooks and all those good   things I frequently tell my wife I'm grateful for  her hard work and she decorates the house as she   sees fit mainly in pink and I don't have a say in  this nor do I particularly care we have a lovely   home which is in no way because of my input  she takes pride in our bed and often buys new   bedding with various patterns or themes normally  this bedding is Pink which I don't particularly   like but I wouldn't complain she recently bought  Sailor Moon bedding I'm no hardcore anime person   but isn't this anime for 13-year-old girls I'm  to sleep in Bedding with these stupid princess   pictures and rabbits and cats on it I feel like  a line has to be drawn somewhere I asked her how   she would feel if I bought Thomas the Tank Engine  beding but she said it isn't the same I got quite   angry about it my dad would roll in his grave if  he knew I was sleeping in little girls bedding she   put the bedding on anyway and I'm threatening to  sleep downstairs until it's removed she's angry   and says I'm being childish I think op is the  jerk and I think they are being childish I'll   be honest Sailor Moon bed sheets is no high class  thousand thread count silk whatever amazingness   you wouldn't let somebody who you were trying  to make a first impression on see it necessarily   but beyond that who cares I personally believe  in being able to celebrate the things you like   whether that's posters whether that's bed sheets  unless sleeping in those sheets is going to make   OPs you know what fall off like it sounds like  they're kind of scared at might then maybe they   should look into putting a little bit more effort  around the house and next time changing the sheets   to something they like then it wouldn't be  an issue at all you know considering op only   occasionally might lend a hand this next story is  by jaded lunch 5357 am I the jerk for grounding my   daughter my 38-year-old male daughter 16-year-old  female lives with me fulltime I got married last   year to my now wife Sue 35-year-old female we  dated for 5 years but she always clashed with   my daughter Anna because of their personalities  Anna is a good kid responsible kind and helps   around but she's overall an introvert who doesn't  like to be around people that much and enjoys her   time alone in her room while Sue is the opposite  she loves socializing doing stuff with the people   she loves Etc she always invites Anna to help her  cook and bake do some gardening Etc since they're   both at home most of the time but Anna always  says no Sue has ADHD Anna is always telling Sue   off because she thinks she overwhelms her with  her constant need to be around her because sus   tends to knock at her door too much she sometimes  barges and she feels she forces her to spend time   together because if Anna's in the living room  the kitchen or the garden reading Suz just sits   next to her and starts to talk and then gets  sad because she doesn't like to be around her   we've attended family therapy and Anna is doing  her solo sessions I've also talked to sus that   Anna's privacy in Solo time should be respected  but I don't think it's a good thing that Anna   refuses any kind of contact with Sue and I don't  think she's even trying at all Anna's explained   to me that being around Sue tires her quicker than  any other person because she knows my wife wishes   she were more expressive and talkative and makes  her uncomfortable yesterday I came home early and   I overheard Anna yelling at Sue to get out of  her room I went to see what was happening and   Anna was pushing Suz out she said that Sue just  knocked and let herself in like she always does   while she was getting dressed Suz was apologizing  and saying that she forgot the rule but Anna said   she's tired and that dealing with Sue is worse  than dealing with a small kid this made Sue cry   and I said that it wasn't nice of her and I  grounded her with a week with no phone she's   not talking to me right now and I wonder if it  was wrong because she's never given me the cold   shoulder I think op is the jerk here as somebody  who is definitely an introvert and can relate   to Anna the problem is here that Sue tires are  out because of how often Sue is in approaching   in their space I think Anna doesn't have any  incentive to try and make things work because   there is just never enough time where Anna can  be alone without being interrupted in some form   whether it's knocking on the door sitting near  them trying to engage in a conversation think   of it as like literally like a battery that they  have to recharge and Suz being somebody that's   been so insistent on trying to engage them and  being around them so often is like a appliance   that charges really hard on the battery it's to  the point where when Su just knocks on the door   or tries to talk to them it's like the battery  just goes right back down to zero and it's got   to build its way back up they just aren't given  enough time to fully recharge that battery and   so there's no incentive to be kind or to try to  engage in anything because it just sucks for Anna   let's not forget to mention that they walked in on  them changing too and then they got grounded for   a week for being upset by that our next story is  from throwaway 82 2 354 am I the jerk for stealing   my brother's Spotlight by telling a girl I was  gay I 20 straight male have a younger brother   18-year-old male we're pretty close and a few  years ago he told me he's gay he hasn't told our   parents because we were unsure of how they would  react there's a girl Lisa 19-year-old female who   lives down the road from us and she's had a thing  for me for several years I didn't mind at first   but since she finished school she's been giving me  more and more attention she's very loud and giggly   and obnoxious and I'm not interested she has a  vegetable garden and often comes to our house   with whatever she's grown that week she somehow  always seems to come around when I'm home alone   we have a pool in our back Garden that she often  comes around to use as well I haven't responded   to any of her flirting but she also hasn't made  any real move so I never rejected her properly   until last week I got fed up and told her to back  off and leave leave me alone she wouldn't really   kept saying I just had to give her a chance and  take her out and that I should see her in her   new bikini I snapped and told her I'm gay to get  her to back off that seemed to work but a couple   of days later when my parents brother and I are  all in the lounge together my mom says that we   need to have a conversation she tells me that Lisa  told her I was gay and that her and my dad fully   support that they both said they were proud of me  and gave me hugs I tried to say that I wasn't gay   but they wouldn't listen Meanwhile my brother got  upset and went to his room I went to check on him   an hour or so later and he cried and yelled about  how he should have been the one to have this chat   with our parents and I had ruined his coming out  am I the jerk I don't think op can be the jerk   in this situation because they didn't intend for  any of that to work out the way it did there was   no malice no ill intent they were just trying to  get somebody who could not get the memo to get off   their back was it maybe a poorer Choice than just  straight up saying that they're not interested in   to leave them alone probably but I don't think  that makes them the jerk our next story is from   HH IL bcn am I the jerk for refusing to accept my  niece's Mother's Day card I 24-year-old female am   child-free my entire family's fully aware of that  my parents always wanted grandchildren and my   sisters already popped out too so fortunately they  never gave me much grief for my choice in fact   they've been as supportive as they could be this  incident happened months ago on Mother's day but   the topic has recently come up again on Mother's  Day lunch my 5-year-old niece gave cards to each   female member of the family my sister her mom  my sister-in-law my brother's wife her grandma   and me my card had to the best Annie that's what  she calls me ever happy Mother's Day obviously   she didn't make the card herself and my sister  had a hand in this I really think think this was   a jab to the fact that I don't have children so  I politely refused the card saying that I'm not   your mom and you can give me a card like that  on my birthday she looked a bit upset like she   was about to turn on the Waterworks but her mom  said something to her and she shut up I felt a bit   bad because it wasn't my niece's fault that her  mom used a Mother's Day card as a weapon against   my choices and was about to say something when  the food arrived and she quickly cheered up my   birthday was yesterday and my niece gave me a card  saying happy birthday Annie I joked to my sister   that this time it looks like a real heartfelt  card instead of a backhanded Jive at me my sister   pretended to look confused and then I reminded her  about the Mother's Day card incident she got mad   and said oh yeah the card you made my daughter cry  over I'm sorry your niece loves you so much that   she spent her time making a Mother's Day card for  you I told her she wasn't fooling anyone and there   was no need to give me a Mother's Day card it was  also sexist to give Every Woman a Mother's Day   card even women who weren't moms she told me that  her daughter had done the same for all the male   relatives on Father's day too but I think that's  besides the point as all the men in my family are   fathers already she also said that Mother's Day  also applies to loving ants am I the jerk I think   op is way too strung up on some like greater  meaning thing whether or not it was motivated   or spurred on by the mom just accept the kid card  they're a 5-year-old and they're wanting to give   you a card and I assume get a nice reaction if  anything just do it for the kid and then toss the   card out later if it really bothers you that much  or call out the mom privately if it bothers you   that much this next story is from goth mom life am  I the jerk for going after my sister-in-law after   she broke a rule I'm 24-year-old female a new mom  of a 3-month-old baby girl my husband 31-year-old   male and I have rules that my family has to follow  the big rule is no social media rule I believe in   privacy for my daughter I don't want any photos  of my daughter on social media especially when I   didn't even post photos of her on social media  don't get me wrong I've taken many photos of   her but none are posted on social media 3 weeks  ago I asked my sister-in-law 35-year-old female   to babysit my daughter because my grandmother  got sick and it landed her in the hospital and   the next state over since there was wasn't anyone  under 2 years old allowed on the floor I couldn't   take my daughter to see her after a few days I  went on Facebook and saw my daughter's photo with   the caption first Facebook photo of my niece is  she adorable I saw red I called her and demanded   that she delete the photo and how she'll never  babysit my daughter ever again my husband and   I went home I picked up my daughter and she told  me how dumb it was for having that rule she told   me how I don't love my daughter enough to post  about her we argue and my husband took us home   she made a huge post about how she isn't deleting  the photo and how horrible I am as a mother lastly   called me a jerk for yelling at her over a  photo my in-laws are on her side and saying   I overreacted now my husband's not speaking to  his sister am I the jerk and overreacted op is   definitely not the jerk here and I think it's very  telling about just kind of the general psyche of   a lot of people in the modern era you don't love  your daughter enough that's why you don't post her   on social media yeah well I also love Oreos I'm  not going to post a picture of those every time   I have some I honestly just don't really Vibe with  the whole concept that your whole life has to be   online and out there and shared with everybody  if you do that and that's something you love   and enjoy that's awesome but some people prefer a  private non- interet searchable life I would try   reporting that Facebook photo and hopefully they  they would want to do something about it this next   story is from Majestic lavishness 36 am I the  jerk for telling my sister that her just being   a girlfriend and an actual wife are actually not  the same thing my sister's been dating this guy   Josh for around 7 years now with seemingly no  intent to get married my sister is one of those   people who believe marriage is a scam and doesn't  desire it at all and is fine with just being a   girlfriend with her boyfriend multiple times me  and my parents have tried explaining to her how   getting married is not just about wearing a  wedding dress and all and that there's legal   advantages and perks that she won't be able to  have if she's unmarried she said there's solutions   to that and marriage is not a wish neither for her  nor Josh we are deeply conservative and religious   and take marriage seriously so when I had my  wedding a few months ago I didn't invite Josh   because he's not officially tied to my sister I  told her she can have her views on marriage and   I can have my mine and if she wants me to respect  her decisions and Views she has to respect mine   too and I'm uncomfortable inviting couples who are  neither engaged nor married to my wedding she held   it against us for all these months only attended  the ceremony and stayed at the reception for half   an hour at most and then left she was basically  absent from my wedding anyway a couple of weeks   ago she got into an accident and was hospitalized  for a few days the hospital had a strict close   relative only policy and basically only my parents  could visit my sister as first-degree relatives   Josh couldn't see her and she was mad they  wouldn't allow him she was out of the hospital   soon after with no serious injuries but I used  what happened as an opportunity to teach my sister   why her being a little girlfriend is way different  to being a wife and if her and Josh were actually   married he wouldn't have to miss out on visiting  her in the hospital so his lack of visitation is   their fault my sister now believes I'm the jerk  for using her accident to teach her a lesson but   I don't believe I am since maybe this could be a  wakeup call for the both of them I think op is a   major jerk here frankly I don't see why they care  so much why their sister does or does not want to   get married and I think op can go toing that it's  their religion and their views as to why they   didn't invite Josh to the wedding but personally  I kind of sense from the way op's writing this   that there was probably some more Petty motivation  going on there now admittedly I'm not all caught   up on the ins and outs of Christianity but  actually I've never heard the concept of not   inviting a boyfriend or a girlfriend especially  one of 7 years and only inviting Partners who   are married and or engaged I guess when Opie says  that they're deeply conservative they are deeply   conservative it's kind of funny that op says if  she wants me to respect her decision and Views   she has to respect mine in regards to not inviting  Josh to her wedding but then op at no point ever   respects her decisions anyways how dare op sister  not follow op's deeply religious views our next   story is from spare room throwaway am I the jerk  for starting a house project without discussing   it with my wife my wife Amy 27-year-old female  and I 27-year-old male have a spare room in our   home we've gone back and forth since we moved in  to plus years ago about what we wanted to do with   it but we never took the initiative to actually  Implement any of these plans we already have a   sufficient number of guest rooms and an office  so the room just sits there unutilized I'm not   that worried about it but my wife brings it  up now and then these mentions are just of   the unused room itself not anything concrete she  actually wants to use it for I made a new friend   Ben 30-year-old male about 8 months ago and it was  very much one of those we connected from the first   time we spoke to each other's situations I've  actually never had that many close male friends   so this connection is especially important to me  the conversation flowed so easily we had loads   in common I didn't think such a huge amount of  genuine love and respect for a person could be   developed in less than a year but it's been  very cool to experience that and get to know   them one of the things that we bonded over was  a similar love for art and music Ben is way way   more talented than I am when it comes to painting  but it's something we both enjoy his birthday is   coming up soon and I thought on top of what else  I was getting him I could turn the spare room into   something similar to an art studio for both of us  to use I already ordered a few things for it and   was getting ready to jump into painting the walls  when my wife came in and demanded to know what I   was doing I explained that I was finally fixing up  the spare room she said it was unacceptable able   that I had done this without confirming with her  that it had been okay but I didn't think I would   need to since it's been 2 years and the room has  basically never been touched am I the jerk my only   question is is whose name is on the house yes it  went 2 years without being touched but if you're   going to finally do something with the room  you want to run it by your partner who also I   assume owns the house especially considering  op said they went back and forth about what   they wanted to do with it they just never got  around to it our next story is from dry basil   9692 am I the jerk for telling my husband that  I refuse to attend our family vacation if his   mother attends my husband 32-year-old male and I  30-year-old female have been married for 6 years   we have two daughters three and 9 months old my  mother-in-law has always held a grudge against   me for stealing my husband from her since he's  the youngest and was always a mama's boy when   my kids were born she held the same Grudge and  refuses to touch my kids but when my husband's   older sister proposed the idea for both my family  and hers to go on a family vacation to Hawaii my   mother-in-law gets very upset and says that  we're leaving her out she's always been super   supportive of my sister-in-law's husband and kids  but my sister-in-law is very supportive of me and   my children and she knew that I wouldn't want her  mother there when my husband heard how distraught   his mom was over not getting an invite he decided  to take matters into his own hands and invite his   mom without asking anyone I don't understand why  he would want her to come if she was just going to   continue to disrespect our family when he finally  told us what he did I freak out and say that if he   wants his mom there and he wants to invite his mom  that's totally fine he just needs to understand   that I will not attend nor bring my kids because  I don't want our fun family vacation to turn toxic   I gave him the ultimatum his mother or his wife  and children he chose his mother and said that   she raised him and she deserves to be invited  so am I the jerk for telling my husband that me   and my children would not be attending since his  mother was going I think op is not the jerk and   I think it's a very reasonable ultimatum it's not  a vacation if you're going to be stressed and not   enjoying any moment of it might as well skip the  drama that's inevitably going to happen cuz this   mother-in-law can't control themselves and our  final story of the day is from lowbudget Chimp   am I the jerk for not realizing that little people  meant children okay this sounds stupid as heck but   it's driving me nuts I recently got a job at a  climbing gym we have bouldering in ropes I got   a call from a lady asking if it was appropriate  for a group of little people now I assumed she   meant you know people with dwarfism short statured  people Etc it's not like we have a policy for that   but I know people with some forms of dwarfism  might have issues with their bones or joints   or whatever so I tell her it should be okay but  all climbing is at your own risk so if they have   any medical issues they should ask their doctor  well the day of their booking comes around and   it turns out the little people are actually like a  dozen small children this was a freaking disaster   because there is a strict two kids per one adult  ratio for kids in the gym and also kids aren't   allowed to Bay until they've been assessed so we  pretty much had to tell them that they couldn't   come inside the lady goes off on me for ruining  their weekend and I have to get my manager to   bail me out after which he laughs his butt off but  also calls me an idiot for not understanding that   she was talking about kids who the freak refers to  children as little people was I really supposed to   anticipate that This Woman's use of an extremely  specific term actually referred to another group   of people entirely help me out here Reddit  am I the jerk SL idiot op I think you're not   the jerk and I think you're not the idiot I would  think the same thing I would imagine when you say   little people especially a group of little people  I would imagine you're talking about exactly what   op thought people with dwarfism or some other kind  of short statured condition now I have heard the   term little people be referred to children but it  was like on like some signage or something like a   cutesy thing that you would be able to identify  with your eyes it's just a very very informal   term that you can't just ask somebody and rely  that they understand what you mean if you usually   watch me on Spotify you might have noticed that  the story time you were watching was deleted no   clue what happened but if you click the link in  the description you can listen to the updated   podcast Welcome Friends to another r/ Ami The Jerk  Here video today we've got a lot of hard-hitting   questions to ponder but first a story from birder  throwaway am I the jerk for making my boyfriend   eat fast food for a week my boyfriend grew up in a  house that valued outdated gender Norms the women   were always responsible for cooking and cleaning  so he didn't learn how to do any of that for   most of his life that is until he moved in with me  after college he's been good about a few things he   doesn't mind helping with the dishes or handling  the laundry but the one thing I can't seem to get   him to do is learn how to cook the only thing  he can do is microwave frozen meals I've been   trying to teach him the basics but it seems like  it goes through one ear and just comes out the   other he still can't turn on the oven or use the  stove without help the toaster is too complicated   for him to use he claims doesn't know how to  boil eggs cook rice or even how to measure out   ingredients using cups I just don't understand why  you can't grasp this but is fine with other things   here's the part where I may be a jerk I went on a  Trip 2 weeks ago for work I'm in charge of buying   groceries we have separate accounts and I realized  how expensive his frozen meals actually are $3 to4   for each I said screw it and bought the easiest  ingredients I could find for a lot cheaper for   him to cook on his own he doesn't like leftovers  so me cooking ahead for him was out before I left   I sat him down once again and gave him a very  long lesson on using the oven toaster and stove   as well as how to boil and scramble eggs toast a  piece of toast boil rice and noodles and heat up   pasta sace I also taught him how to pan fry things  like onions and other veggies and how to tell when   they were ready in case he doesn't want to cook  both lunch and dinner I also bought things to make   salads and fixings for sandwiches I come back a  week later and he's angry he claims I practically   left him to starve and how I know he has trouble  cooking I retaliate saying that I showed him what   to do and I get a whole range of excuses setting  the oven and stove temp is too complicated he cut   his finger chopping onions and couldn't chop any  until his cut healed he only likes the salad kits   so everything is balanced apparently he only ate  sandwiches canned goods and fast food for a week   he thinks I'm a major jerk for not telling him  I'm not buying his frozen meals and leaving him   alone to fend for himself on one hand I do think  it was crappy of me not to tell him I didn't buy   his meals and as someone who grew up in a home  pretty much only boiled hot dogs and veggies and   only properly learned how to cook after moving out  I do feel for him but at the same time after a few   months of not getting the simplest Concepts I'm  left feeling partially justified in my actions so   Reddit am I the jerk so I'm not going to pretend  like I know how to cook I know very very little on   how to actually cook I do know one thing though  it is insanely easy to use the toaster how can   you not use a toaster you literally have one job  and that's just to watch it and stop it before   it gets too cooked you can literally sit there  for 3 minutes tops just popping it back up and   restarting it until it's good enough would you  guys agree with me when I say that this isn't a   person who doesn't know how to cook that this is  actually a person that refuses to put any effort   in in anything whatsoever relating to cooking and  that if you have to say that you can't even use a   toaster that literally just exposes you for not  even trying that this guy is just looking for an   easy way to say nope can't can't do it sorry do  it all for me let me know if you guys agree with   me in the comments down below our next story is  from your cats BFF am I the jerk for wanting to   make my boyfriend homeless because of my lunch  habits Alex male 30 and I female 33 got together   in late 2019 and recently decided to move in  together I asked for a trial run where we both   kept our flats for a few months so no one loses  their place if it doesn't work out he had issues   with this but I held firm that it was for everyone  's benefit and he eventually agreed we decided he   would stay with me as my flat is bigger and  closer to his work then after a few months we   would look for a house I work at home and he's  now close enough to his office to come back for   lunch he initially assumed that we'd be eating  lunch together each day because I'm home but I   don't eat lunch and I don't take a break for it my  preference is to take smaller breaks when I want   them and eat a snack around 3:00 p.m. a piece of  fruit and a bag of nuts is my go-to this has been   an issue since he moved in he walked in while I  was on calls 2 Days running and loudly commented   about it being lunchtime in the UK I work for an  international org I was Furious as it prompted an   unnecessary and awkward conversation with my boss  who was concerned I was risking burnout he agreed   to knock going forward although my position is  that during his lunch hour we don't really need   to make time to see each other at all as he will  be back for the day in 5 hours the issue is he   then started insisting I need to eat breakfast  and lunch even if he's not included for context   I gained some weight when I started working from  home and my current eating habits suit my schedule   while keeping my weight where I wanted his claim  is that I starve myself to log in as soon as I   wake up and that I'm too obsessed with work to  take breaks I've explained that my eating habits   suit me and I don't want to change them but he  uses me eating normally at the weekend as some   kind of gotcha and won't accept what I'm saying he  brings it up daily this is a problem but not the   problem the problem is that this has been going on  for nearly a month and it just isn't the life for   me we sat down this evening to talk and I said  that I'm not enjoying living together and that   it's too much too soon so I would like for him to  move back to his place this weekend turns out he   didn't keep the flat he gave it up straight away  and moved his stuff to his mom's his reasoning   being he knew we would be fine dear reader we are  not fine he says I need to put the effort in work   through this and compromise and that I'm too angry  to talk and me being a workaholic is going to cost   us the relationship so we'll calm down and talk  about it another time my position is that him   lying about his place is a deal breaker even  if the rest wasn't my best friend just had a   baby and my mom's on holiday so I have no one to  tell me if I'm out of order Reddit am I the jerk   I think op isn't the jerk in this situation and  I think they kept each other's flats or at least   were supposed to for this very exact reason what  frustrates me is it seems like Alex just doesn't   comprehend that what op is saying as far as him  needing to move back to his flat isn't about   compromising or making things work it's the fact  that op knows it isn't going to work full stop I   just hope for op's sake it doesn't get too messy  by the way if you're enjoying these stories make   sure to hit those like And subscribe buttons down  below so you never miss any of my daily videos our   next stories from available Arc am I the jerk for  asking a mom in my group if she needed someone to   talk to about her drinking a new woman joined  my mom group about 2 months ago Sherry At first   she seemed great nice funny smart has three young  kids who are awesome we like having you're around   except me and Lauren noticed something every  single time we would get together share would   try to make it into a wine night hang out to let  the kids play at the playground in the evening   she'll bring the wine hanging out after school  sign up day Wine Time kids birthday party comes   around well she's got the beverages including the  wine every single time we hang out she has to have   a glass in her hand the glass turns into a bottle  the issue is that she does not seem like she's had   an entire bottle of wine so about 2 weeks ago we  all planned on getting the kids together and going   to a great water park obviously water plus alcohol  is a dangerous combo especially with kids so when   Sherry pulled out a pint of titos and waved it  around telling everyone she had a little treat   for the moms I felt like I had to say something I  said oh I don't think it's a good idea for us to   mix alcohol at a water park like that especially  with the kids around she said it would be fine she   does it all the time at this I was kind of more  alarmed so when it was just the two of us I said   Sherry are you okay do you maybe need to talk to  someone about your drinking she looked shocked and   said no and then acted like I was absolutely crazy  she said she had no idea where I got that idea   that her drinking was absolutely normal and that  where she's from Atlanta It's Perfectly Normal for   people to drink at Social gatherings I said okay  and that I was just concerned because I've never   hung out with her when she hasn't been drinking  she got defensive and told me that she didn't   like people up her butt monitoring her after that  point her mood was soured for the day Lauren told   me that it was a good thing that I said something  but two of the other moms said that it was going   to cause a huge issue and that now sher's talking  crap about me being a busy body I was not trying   to shame her but I know how being a stay-at-home  mom can turn people into addicts real fast and I   didn't want to see her end up that way am I  the jerk I don't think op's the jerk because   they had good intentions about it although it was  probably presented in a poor way I think it would   have been maybe better for op to have asked about  how it seems like every week there has to be like   a drinking element to it and then maybe hoping it  kind of branches into a more open discussion but   apparently also getting like defensive about these  kinds of questions is actually kind of an aspect   that appears a lot in people who do have alcoholic  Tendencies so really I'm not sure I think being a   wine mom or drinking wine all the time kind of  has gotten a little too normalized but I don't   think Opie's The Jerk here for what they did this  next story is from Deer account 5349 am I the jerk   for saying my stepdaughter is not entitled to my  late ex-wife or daughter's money I'm married to   Ashley our girls from previous relationships are  both 17 my ex-wife was Sam she and I were never   a great couple but we were great friends and  great parents SL co-parents so we stayed very   close after the divorce I was aware that she had  started saving for our daughter's future education   we had reached somewhat of a compromise on how  to handle that I did most of the spending on   her adolescent activities and Extras so all her  extracurricular activities hobbies and for the   most part gifts that we shared while she saved for  the future in an effective way I never knew how   much was in that account out until 2 years ago  when my ex died it was then that I learned she   saved a hefty amount and that aside for allowing  for her funeral expenses she had left money for   our daughter to use as she saw fit outside of the  college money Ashley and I married 7 years ago and   at the same time we had discussed money for the  girls Etc I explained that I wasn't saving but my   ex-wife was she hadn't started saving anything  for her daughter at that point and her ex was   not saving either so we started to put a little  by when we could but we were never able to save   huge chunks at a time after Sam died money became  a much larger issue Ashley was upset to learn my   daughter had a considerable amount more than my  stepdaughter for college and that she had money   to spare it only became a bigger deal this past  may my daughter told me she had decided to do   community college in her mom's Hometown so she  could be close to her grandparents for a while   and could still follow follower dreams Ashley then  brought up how some of that money could go to my   stepdaughter I told her no that it wasn't our  money and even if she tried to suggest that it   would be mine seeing as my daughter was a minor I  pointed out that it would be stealing to just take   it from her and I'd never contributed to that  fund directly it would be taking my ex-wife's   money Ashley went off about Sam putting so much  away when she knew our daughter had a step sister   and how she was self to make her so much better  off than her only sibling I told her she needed   to get over that because Sam only had one child to  think about and it wasn't her job to think about   my stepdaughter or even any bio kids I could have  after our divorce Ashley told me to think about   my stepdaughter I told her my stepdaughter is not  entitled to my daughter's money or my ex-wife's   money whichever way she wanted to look at it  she asked how I could be so callous about her   daughter's disadvantage am I the jerk I think op  is definitely not the jerk here and surprisingly   I feel like a lot of people in this situation  at least those that would end up on r/ am I   the jerk would be the kind that want to pull the  money from their daughter I think it's honestly   great and refreshing to see somebody like op who  can contextualize where that money came from who   it belongs to and who has a right to it which is  only op's daughter this next story is from mcneel   1345 am I the jerk for buying a fire blanket for  our new house hi y'all my partner 29-year-old   female and I 27-year-old male have recently  bought a house together and we'll be moving in   in 2 weeks as this is the biggest purchase of Our  Lives I want to make sure we're well protected in   case of emergencies so I've been looking online  for safety devices I found a fire blanket for 9   British pounds so I decided to buy it with my  own money as it's better to have and not need   than need and not have the fire blanket arrived  the following day and for some reason this was a   huge issue for my girlfriend and started a really  unnecessary argument she was questioning why I   bought it how I could prioritize a fire blanket  over other items Furniture washing machine TV   Etc what my logic was behind buying it and how we  don't need a fire blanket as none of her family   and friends have one she also said this was a  huge red flag from her side as it shows I have   questionable l IC and decision making and she's  worried I may do something even more stupid in   the future from my side I was only thinking about  our safety it can easily be taken with us when we   move I used my money to pay for it and it's just a  good item to have in case of a panire in addition   I've been looking at the bigger items but there's  still people living at the property we're moving   to so we can't exactly buy things like Furniture  until they've moved out I honestly don't see   the big deal as it's just a fire blanket but the  argument resurfaced this morning and she said her   family and friends agree with her and think I'm an  idiot for buying it I've been molding this over in   my mind trying to think what could possibly be so  controversial about a fire blanket but I'm coming   up empty each time so Reddit I've come to you to  try and get some perspective and objectivity am   I the jerk I'm of the opinion that nobody can  be an idiot or a jerk for buying something in   the best interest of safety especially when you  only only pay £9 for it that's about $1 Us by the   way for the ease of mind it gives you for knowing  that if you ever have a grease fire going on you   have something to battle it with what's the issue  with it I would say not only that you should get   a fire extinguisher what's next is op an idiot for  buying new batteries for the smoke alarm too maybe   it wouldn't be wise to spend that money on that  carbon monoxide monitor if anything for op's sake   I would take this as a red flag to keep in the  back of your mind mind obviously op cares about   their safety so they should probably consider the  safety of their future with this person our next   story is from dat of two throwaway am I the jerk  for taking my wife's side after she screamed and   cursed at my mother I 33-year-old male am married  to my wonderful wife Melody 29-year-old female and   she's currently pregnant with our first child  together I have a six-year-old daughter Tina   whose mother I split 50/50 custody with so I  know for the most part what Melody needs in   order to feel supported while she carries our  child I've been spending lots of time making   sure she's comfortable and taking on more of the  load at home so she's not doing too much this is   her first child after all and it's obviously a lot  for her physically and emotionally my mother and   Melody don't get along too well mom didn't like  my ex either we broke up because we were headed   on different paths not because of my mother and  there's no bad blood so I think she just doesn't   like her because she's dating me for whatever  reason it's weird she's very nitpicky about Melody   how much she does around the house how emotional  she is Melody already cries very easily and being   pregnants made her even more sensitive which is  fine the fact that she wants to be a stay-at-home   mom it just seems like nothing Melody does is  okay I do however stand up for her and do not   just allow my mom to talk down do her today before  picking up my daughter from summer camp Melody   went to three different grocery stores to Find  rotisserie chicken she's been talking about it   since last night and really really wanted one she  sent me a picture message documenting her quest   for the chicken and finally found it my girl was  happy rotisserie chicken is also kind of a comfort   food for her like spaghetti because her mom used  to make one of those when she was having a lazy   day and didn't feel like cooking she was planning  on serving that with some other basic sides for   dinner perfectly fine by me my mother came by to  see Tina and started telling Melody the chicken   is bad for her and she shouldn't be eating that  while pregnant Melody said it's fine she usually   eats healthy and just wants this one thing she's  craving my mom went on about how unhealthy it was   and said she needs to eat something else Melody  said No and went to the backyard to FaceTime her   family out of state when she came back my mom had  thrown out the food in ordered takeout a salad for   Melody and pizza for everyone else Melody asked  where the chicken was and my mother told her that   she needs to start being a responsible mother and  eat correctly for the baby melody screamed what   the freak is wrong with you why are you always  such a witch to me she then started crying and   called me home I came back and asked my mother  to leave after hearing her story and said she   is not to come back until she apologizes for how  she treated Melody my mom went on about how I'm   choosing another woman over her but I I just think  enough is enough and Melody reached her limit she   apologized to me for blowing up when Tina was in  the house but I told her it's okay things happen   Tina's okay and I went to find her another chicken  before the store closed my dad thinks I'm right   for taking Melody side but my brother thinks  I should always defend mom so am I the jerk op   is definitely not the jerk here I don't care how  wrong you think it is you don't go around throwing   away somebody else's food especially when you  don't even live in that household and I don't   know who this Grandma thinks they are but I don't  think rotisserie chicken is really all that bad   honestly op kicking them out and then going out  and finding a replacement chicken op is a saint   and honestly deserves a lot of praise for how they  handled this situation forget all that noise op's   brother's making about how they should always  defend mom choose another woman over her sorry   I forgot op and their mom were dating our next  story is from throwaway DNS and am I the jerk for   taking in my niece despite my husband's complaints  even though we were child-free 25-year-old female   and 27-year-old male niece is 3 years old my  sister asked if we would be able to take her   daughter since she had to go out of town for a  surgical procedure and wouldn't be able to care   for her daughter while she recovers I ran this by  my husband who immediately said no and shook his   head I said it was my niece and that just because  we weren't really fans of having kids ourselves   doesn't mean we can't do a favor for my family  it ended in an argument but I ended up taking her   anyways he refuses to do anything with her this  isn't the first time they've met He's just never   really interacted with her which I don't expect  him to but when I brought up that he could have   a better attitude about this he just said that I  shouldn't have brought a kid into our home he also   went on a rant that because of this I'm probably  going to change my mind about having kids and he   won't won't put up with that said like that he  will divorce me if I even suggest it my niece   hadn't even been much of a problem in fact she's  usually quiet unless she's hungry or tired yes   she gets into stuff and makes messes but I assume  that's pretty standard toddler Behavior I don't   understand why he's so angry since it's not like  he's having to do anything I think op isn't the   jerk and bless them for trying to help out for  their own sibling I don't think I'm the only one   to think this but I feel like op's husband is  the one acting more like a toddler than their   own 3-year-old niece is this is one of those  situations where the husband needs a nice dose   of ride it out it'll be over soon just put up with  it op's husband seems like the kind of person to   complain super hard about nagging and then turn  around and nag a million times about something   they don't like our next story is from throwa 5749  38 4763 am I the jerk for not wearing contact tax   on a double date I 25-year-old female was recently  set up on a blind date with a friend of my sisters   30-year-old female boyfriend 30-year-old male  she was really excited about it and refused to   give me any details about him but said I'd know  him when I saw him and I did it turns out her   boyfriend's friend was my former Middle School  Crush 27-year-old male we went to a small middle   school so everything was everyone's business so  he knew about it it was sort of embar embarrassing   but I'm also hot now for the first time after  losing a lot of weight so I don't really care   the issue arose when my date Eric asked me what  happened to my eye he knew me before I started   wearing contacts and encouraged me to take them  out if I was comfortable I have heterochromia   one blue eye One Brown ever since I started  High School I've been wearing brown contacts   for a variety of reasons the first is because my  vision is awful the second is for my own Comfort   most people are Norm Al about it but I've had some  people be aggressive about proving that my eyes   are fake the third is because my sister didn't  want me taking attention away from her during   her senior year of high school so she asked me  to wear contacts after she graduated I stopped   wearing them but whenever I would do anything  with her she would request that I wear contacts   to cover up my condition I do it automatically  whenever I see her now because if I don't she'll   get really withdrawn and start crying anyway my  sister was really really happy that the date went   well and suggested that we all go out together we  ended up going to a local farm and garden center I   decided not to wear my contacts because my eyes  tend to get very irritated with the combination   of the Heat and the dust my sister knows this so  I figured her suggesting this particular venue   was her way of giving me permission to come in  just glasses when her boyfriend saw my eyes he   was fascinated he kept asking me questions about  it and making jokes jokes at the end of the day he   wanted to take a group photo but had us do it  inside the store so no one would have to wear   sunglasses afterwards I got a text from my sister  saying thanks for ruining a good day I eventually   texted her back saying I didn't want to make  things weird but she could have told him about   the eye thing beforehand she never responded  but I got a phone call from my mom a few hours   ago berading me for ruining my sister's wedding  apparently the reason she was so upset was she's   been secretly engaged for the past week only  my mom knew they were waiting until after my   mom's birthday to announce it sister didn't want  her fiance or his family to know about my eyes   until after the wedding so I would look normal  and pictures and his family wouldn't harass me   about it which I sort of appreciate I feel really  bad that she's fighting with her boyfriend over   me and I'm kicking myself for not just wearing  contacts I love my sister and I don't want her   to be a upset despite her thing with my eyes we've  always been really close so I think pretty clearly   op is not the jerk and op is weirdly conditioned  to be so okay with hiding their eye color for the   sake of their sister's sanity I think this whole  story is ridiculous and op shouldn't wear contacts   because they just feel obligated to not upstage  somebody from being naturally who they are just   the whole thing blows my mind and our final story  of the day from blinket Fort Queen am I the jerk   for bringing my one-year-old to a Distillery  important info we were in The Tasting Room with   couches and sitting areas and some tables we  were initially the only ones there then just   as we finished two other people walk in we were  sitting in one of the lounging slitting areas   and little one was getting fussy in her stroller  so I took her out and she played right around me   on the stroller the other people chose to sit at  the lounging section across from us little one   was laughing and playing quietly for the most part  but occasionally did start doing that excited yell   SL scream thing kids do because she was happy it  didn't happen a lot maybe two to three times over   the course of 30 minutes she was babbling and  talking a lot but it wasn't loud at all the two   gentlemen were clearly not impressed and after  a bit mov to a table then a bit later I heard   one of them Mumble something about squealing and  ask to work or if they could go sit outside we   ended up leaving soon after I've never had this  experience in public before and I'm wondering if   it was because it was a Distillery that there's  some Unwritten rule about not bringing kids and   maybe I'm the jerk honestly a tasting room or a  Distillery is kind of one of those places that   really is kind of meant for adults only you know  the people who are legally able to drink at those   places honestly it's kind of surpris surprising  that there's places that don't have a rule against   having anybody there that's under the legal  age for wherever you're at like if this was   in the UK I believe it would be 16 so I think  op is just kind of like a gentle jerk here as   long as the place doesn't have a rule against  it they're within the right to bring their kid   but it doesn't pass the vibe check am I the jerk  for blocking access to my food and threatening   no help with accommodation I 22 old male and in  my first serious relationship with h 25-year-old   female we've been together just under a year she  moved into my place 3 months ago everything was   fine in the beginning but once we started seeing  each other more frequently I noticed her bad habit   every time we went out and food was involved she  would sample my food before I got to it we're not   just talking of a chip here and there for my chip  butt sandwich in actual classy places she would   take the first chunk of my steak or salmon or  cake you name it she would take the first bite   I had several talks with her about this but she  said it was cute and not Sinister four months   ago H got a job with training opportunity after  completion when she returns to her normal place   the salary will be higher my place is 40 minutes  closer than where she used to live and I offered   her to live with me rentree if she stopped with  this Behavior the first month she stuck to our   agreement the second month she slipped up a few  times this last month she's gone back to her old   ways last weekend a turning point I bake as a  hobby I made cake after dividing it into eight   I left it in the fridge while I went out with a  friend usually when I bake and Friends drop me   off I'll fetch a few slices and thank them for the  lift home with the cake imagine my surprise when   I saw that each piece had a bite taken I found my  friend that I owed him cake and he need and wait   for me to come back down I was angry I told her  that she embarrassed me and we needed to figure   out as solution she went defensive and said she  ate it due to loving me so much that all women   do this and guys love it I made it very clear  that she needed to stop now or there would be   consequences next day I bought a lock box for the  fridge she was livid but couldn't do much last   night she broke the lock and had taken a bite out  of all my snacks and two slices of baguettes in   there I told her to pack her stuff and leave while  I stay with my mother for a few hours she called   me a jerk for making her homeless and possibly  ruining her employment opportunities Reddit   am I the jerk this is one of those things that  just drives you insane and it's also a very fair   request for them to say hey knock this off or this  just isn't going to work out if you were dating   somebody for a brief time that did this would you  feel bad about kicking them out knowing they have   nowhere else to go let me know what you guys think  in the comments down below our next story is from   TF no and am I the jerk for keeping the engagement  ring and giving up asking to propose after propose   in front of my parents and in-laws I'm 25-year-old  female my girlfriend Molly 26-year-old female for   the last 6 months started with a joke that I've  already made clear that I don't like it consists   of her saying no quickly to anything I ask I know  it sounds silly but I ask her to get a glass of   water for me she says no and after 1 minute I'm  almost getting up she says she's joking and get   some water I ask her to wash the dishes she says  no I say I love you she says no I ask her to take   her clothes she says no everything is joking and  after 30 seconds to a minute she does it but she's   addicted to doing it I've already made it clear  several times that I don't like it even more so   in I love you she's the only person I can say that  so it's special to me and there are things that   are serious and I need her to answer seriously and  if she says no to everything jokingly I can't tell   when she's saying a real no it's already happened  I keep saying this is boring and I don't like it   she stops doing it and goes back to doing it after  a week after a brief discussion she played this   prank in front of our friends me asking love can  you give me some medicine and she with no kidding   she stopped doing it for 1 month yesterday  we welcomed my parents in-laws and our two   best friends to our house everyone knew that I was  going to propose to her and I called them because   we always plan this proposal with our loved ones  attending participating in this special day I   asked her to marry me and she said a quick no and  I was so grumpy and panicked and upset everyone   looked and shocked for 30 seconds for her to laugh  and say she was joking finally saying yes I was so   embarrassed and disappointed I put the ring box  back in and said I'd take it out to cool off I   didn't even let her say anything she kept texting  me not answering calls saying it was just a joke   and that I knew she always did that she said I  left a difficult situation in the house because   it was very clear that I'd given up on purpose  and did so in front of my parents and in-laws   she stressed that I was making the situation  uncomfortable because of a silly joke well I   slept in a hotel and I'm still in it my parents  supported me but but my in-laws are calling me a   jerk for giving up on proposing disproportionately  humiliating their daughter I just really think   there's a time for jokes and that moment clearly  she knew I didn't like it and decided to do it   anyway am I the jerk honestly in my life I've done  a lot of similar things where somebody close to me   asks me to do something I say no and immediately  go to do whatever they asked anyways but when I do   that it's far and few between and I just can't  imagine thinking it's fun to pull that cutesy   little prank if you want to call it that when  you're getting proposed to it's just a little   over immature and them doing that in that moment  I think can serve as like a really good reminder   that they honestly annoy you and maybe it isn't  right as brutal as that sounds I don't think op's   the jerk our next story is from Individual 1 2578  am I the jerk for buying my granddaughter more   expensive Ive gifts than my grandson I have many  grandchildren but this is about the oldest ones   Jake 18 and Maya 18 they're cousins not siblings  18th birthdays are very important in our family so   for Jake's 18th birthday I told him I'll buy him  whatever he wants as long as it's reasonable of   course he told me he needs a new phone so I bought  one for him which cost me around ,000 I encouraged   him to choose other gifts as well but he said it's  enough for my May's 18th birthday I did the same   thing and told her to choose whatever she wants  she gave me a list of the things that she wanted   and it cost me about $7,000 I was a bit unsure  whether I should buy them or not but decided   that it would be unfair if I don't buy it because  Jake had the same offer and he chose not to get   anything else Jake's father my son was very angry  at Maya's birthday he said I'm showing favoritism   I tried to explain to him that I'm not because  Jake had the same offer his argument was that   I raised Maya her parents worked a lot and I was  basically her babysitter while I didn't have as   much contact with Jake his mom was a stay-at-home  mom so naturally Maya would be closer to me and   it would be easier for her to ask me for things  honestly a lot of people are saying op is the   jerk here but I don't necessarily agree with that  I think op would be the jerk only if they're not   willing to correct and kind of even out the value  here they're saying oh they should have capped it   out at $1,000 after Jake settled at that point but  I'm more of the opinion let Maya get whatever they   want and then make it fair to Jake now if op is  refusing to even it out in any way and sticks firm   then they would definitely be the jerk I guess the  question is are they a jerk for not going out of   their way to even it out after Maya got the gifts  by the way if you're enjoying these stories make   sure to hit those like And subscribe buttons down  below so you never miss any of my daily videos   our next story is from acceptable scene 6870 am  I the jerk for not telling my husband he smells   sooner and ruining a friend's wedding this week  was the wedding of two of my husbands 33-year-old   male and my 31-year-old female longtime friends  for some background recently we've been having   some issues I told him I needed some space so  we agreed he should move back in with his mom   temporarily I wasn't thrilled about this because  she tends to Baby him though I had to accept it as   he had nowhere else to go and I wanted him out of  the house I wondered what to do about the wedding   we talked and decided it would be best for us  to go together and for him to move back home   afterwards he didn't have time before the wedding  to pack up his things and so got ready at his   mom's while I got ready at home and we planned to  meet there when he arrived I was already chatting   with friends he came over to us and immediately  I noticed this rotten Sten on him he smelled like   he'd been dumpster diving it made my eyes water a  little I noticed our friends noticing but he was   completely oblivious and kept on chatting I tried  to let him know discreetly but he wasn't getting   the hint at all we took our seats in the chapel  and the service was beautiful by this point my   nose had pretty much tuned out the smell but it  was clearly affecting other people and I still   hadn't had a chance to let him know after the  service I saw an old girlfriend I hadn't seen   seen in years and wanted to catch up apparently  while I was chatting with her a friend had pulled   hubby aside and basically told him he stunk he  got upset and demanded we leave immediately in   the car we argued and he told me I was a horrible  wife to let him embarrass himself like that in   front of friends and that I was probably laughing  behind his back he said that I knew he could be   forgetful and since he was my responsibility as  my wife I should have called him up at his mom   to remind him to shower usually he'll come in  when I'm in I was speechless and said nothing   the entire car ride home while he bered me this  morning I checked my phone and we both have been   removed from a number of group chats that included  friends that went to that wedding I heard through   some friends that the bride feels we ruined her  day more people were talking about my husband   than we thought and she no longer wants to speak  with us I'm shocked and really hurt by this and   have been feeling guilty all day I didn't want  to embarrass him by letting him know when other   people were around but now I've cost him friends  and feel like I've handled it all horribly so am   I the jerk so I don't think op's outright the  jerk I think it's usually the best policy to   just let them know as soon as he can that said  the husband literally told op it's your job as   my wife to call me up and remind me to shower to  remind you to shower are you an elementary school   just for that alone op is not the jerk this next  story is from thy shall be cold am I the jerk for   refusing to talk to my sibling my sister I'll  caller T here has always been more successful   than me especially academically I have certain  learning difficulties but I'm in no way dumb I   just need more instructions for me to be able to  complete certain tasks T always seem to believe   that she's better than me because of this to the  extent that she would say it to my face and hon   honestly I couldn't really argue with her because  our parents took her side A few years ago T failed   to get into Oxford her dream University but still  ended up at a very good University at the time I   was working my butt off with schoolwork because I  also wanted to get into a very good University and   make my family including her proud of me I managed  to graduate high school in the top of my class I   applied to multiple universities one of them being  Cambridge I didn't think I would be able to get in   even with my good grades in high school and extra  activities but it was my dream University to my   surprise I managed to get into four of the five  universities I applied for Cambridge being one   of the four I was very happy about it but te was  not she came into my room and started crying and   shouting at me because I got into a university  that was more prestigious than hers she told me   that if I was a good sibling I wouldn't mind  going to a less known University and started   saying stuff like how could you do something  like this to me I'm the smart child you hate me   don't you I bet you'll fail and drop out with that  pathetic IQ of yours I barely spoke to her after   that and when I moved out I blocked her on every  social media I had my parents are very mad at me   saying that I should have at least talked to her  and let her apologize and tell me that she acted   that way because she was just very angry in that  moment and didn't mean it they say I'm being very   immature but that was the last straw for me and  I don't want to talk to her even though it's been   almost a year since we had the fight this next  story is from lazy W am I the jerk for calling   my girlfriend an inconsiderate jerk for waking  me up on my day off every day I get up at 5:00   a.m. for work I do everything I can to be as quiet  as physically possible to not wake my partner of   course it's not going to be perfect every time but  I'd say around 90% of the time she doesn't wake   up at all while I'm showering and getting ready  Etc she on the other hand can be flexible as to   when she gets up and starts work she works from  home and in her role she doesn't have any direct   Superior to monitor her or at least one that cares  now this woman is atrocious with punctuality and   time management she's always late to everything  she wakes up late almost every day but she's   able to just log onto her laptop straight out of  bed she can just get away with it the fact that   I have to get up early for work every day means I  really value a li in on my days off it's something   I've always appreciated and taken pleasure in  sleeping until 9 or 10:00 a.m. when possible   we have no kids or any other responsibilities  that would make this an impossible or otherwise   irresponsible pleasure I usually have weekends off  the same as her but due to the shift pattern I'm   on I sometimes have weekday off this week being  Wednesday and Thursday now this morning as per   usual she woke up late for work actually she woke  up made a cup of tea sat on Tick Tock for a bit   and then had a rush around because she was late  for work this is regular behavior for her she's   now frantically rushing around trying to get ready  quite literally running around the house in and   out of rooms up and down the stairs banging doors  and stomping around everywhere making it of course   she was also wearing flip-flops so I could hear  them loudly slapping against her feet with every   step when she finally stopped darting around  like a cat in heat she came into the bedroom   to use her makeup and toiletries every single  can bottle brush pencil whatever gets slammed   on the table some drop on the floor hairspray  and perfume being sprayed everywhere this is   the same woman who asks me to spray my deodorant  outside the room because it's loud and makes the   room toxic she then says she needs to use the  hair dryer I responded oh because you've been   so quiet up till now she's just replied I don't  care and used the haird dryer twice this is what   really pissed me off honestly she clearly could  just not at all give a crap in the slightest is   what really gets under my skin and has annoyed  the freak out of me to me it's just inconsiderate   and shows the ugly side of her character and  somewhat crappy attitude so I angrily called her   an inconsiderate jerk she almost seemed a little  confused and said that it was really uncalled for   and that I was overreacting I wouldn't mind as  much if it was a oneoff or rare occurrence but   it isn't while typing this I do feel like I  might have overreacted a bit but it's really   aggravated me and made me wake up in a horrible  mood am I the jerk for reacting poorly to this   do I genuinely owe her an apology I don't think  go is the jerk and I think they have one of two   ways to try to handle this one is sit them down  and try to talk it out and explain that they both   have to be courteous when they wake up or to  Fight Fire with Fire and at 500 a.m. show them   how nice it is to have all those interruptions  our next story is from Little repeat 2427 am I   the jerk for making my mom cry and hurting her  marriage my mom has me 16-year-old female and   my brother's Nico 17-year-old male and sheay 18y  old male with our dad he died on my fifth birthday   really suddenly mom was young and had the three  of us and she ended up meeting our stepdad less   than a year later I think it was about 2 years  after my dad died that she introduced him to   us as her boyfriend and they married fast after  that at the time mom and my stepdad wanted him   to adopt us and to change our last names to his so  we could be illegal family and share a family name   we had said no but they went through the process  for the adoption and when it came came time for   court the judge took us aside and we spoke to him  we expressed that we didn't want to be adopted or   to have our last name changed it's not something I  remember the best because at the time I was really   upset but the end result was the judge turned  down the adoption request and the change of   name request my grandma said that the judge told  my mom and stepdad that he didn't want to leave   us feeling even more robbed of our dad by taking  away his name and his ties to us legally after all   that my stepdad tried so hard to get us to start  calling him dad he always called us his kids his   daughters Sons Etc but he made for a real emphasis  on how much he wanted to be our dad and how he   wanted to feel us accept him in that kind of way  Mom would sit and tell us how we were blessed to   have two dads one in heaven who looked down on us  and one who was with us on Earth and could raise   us and be the parent we needed she said it would  be such a positive thing to embrace him as our   dad my brothers and and I never did call him dad  mom had more kids with our stepdad and they called   him dad but it was always a problem that we didn't  my oldest brother graduated last year and he moved   out soon after he graduated early and there were  some things that went down which resulted in mom   and stepdad bringing Nico and me to therapy with  them four weeks ago during therapy my mom and   stepdad brought up how tired he is of feeling like  he raised us for nothing because we never show him   the love he believes he deserves and and we don't  show him the respect he wants by denying him the   title of Dad they said he's very close to leaving  so Mom asked if either of us would consider trying   to be more open to the idea would we at least  refer to him as Dad to others even if we don't   call him dad to his face I said I would never be  okay with that my brother too Mom cried and my   stepdad well I think that was a breaking point for  him it feels like their marriage is all but over   and deep down I know both of them blame me and my  brothers I hate seeing my mom so upset my stepdad   can't hide the fact that he's angry with us over  it am I the jerk so I think op is not the jerk   this is obviously a very complex situation but the  fact of the matter is the stepdad I feel is trying   to replace the father and personally I believe  if the kids don't want to call you Dad or want   to feel like it's essentially replacing their own  father I feel like you have to respect that even   if you really want that title of Dad it's the  kind of thing I think you grin and bear and be   a dad to them as much as you can in action and not  necessarily title I think them forcing the issue   only made it worse because it just makes them even  less comfortable with the idea of calling them dad   or embracing them in at least that fashion our  next story is from David throwaway AIT am I the   jerk for publicly telling my biological father  that if he wanted to act like my dad then he   hadn't until I was 32 to do so my mother passed  away a few months after I was born my biological   father Dan stayed for the first six years of my  life but he ended up remarrying and moving with   his new wife across the country he left me with  my grandparents Dan would at best visit every   buy annually he would show up in the morning with  some treats and video games for me talk with me   about life then he would be gone after dinner  Dan's visits would become less frequent as it   got older I have many memories of my grandparents  calling Dan when they thought I was asleep they   would beg Dan to visit me more or bring me with  him to Georgia because a boy needs his father I   still adored Dan and saw him as my hero for many  years Dan stopped visiting me after I tried to   ruin his marriage with my selfishness Dan didn't  call me to wish me a happy 13th birthday so I   called him over hoping that he just didn't want to  wake me up because of the time difference his wife   Sarah answered the phone Sarah was actually a very  sweet lady and I discovered Sarah didn't even know   I existed Dan told Sarah that he'd been visiting  California on business and how he was childless   Dan screamed at me later saying how I deliberately  tried to ruin his marriage and how selfish I am   to always demand his time after that point Dan  stopped visiting me and I view him as nothing   more than a sperm donor to me I live a pretty good  life my job's nothing to brag about in terms of   being fun but it's honest work and pays well my  wonderful wife and I have a little girl Harper   who is the joy of my life I tried not to think  about Dan until I started getting notifications   on social media I didn't think Dan had social  media we also have a very generic surname so I   didn't worry about us finding each other Dan left  comments on almost all of our posts about Harper   from her last day of second grade to the newborn  pictures his comments All said how beautiful   and bright his granddaughter was I messaged Dan  telling him he has no right to act like Harper's   grandfather and to stay away from my family he  replied that Harper was his granddaughter and   he gave me life so I owe him some darn respect  I warned him again and blocked him I made a post   the other day and Dan on a second account made a  comment about how Harper gets her good looks from   her Grandpa I replied to Dan that if he wanted  to act like my dad dad he had until I was 32   to do so and he has no right to pretend he's some  great father and grandfather when he moved across   the country and left me with my grandparents at  6 I blocked Dan again I learned secondhand that   Dan is being shamed online and will likely delete  his account soon family members said I was right   about Dan but calling him out online was not the  mature way to handle things I realized I could   have just blocked him but for me you don't get  to ditch your kid and then swoop in to act like   a family man now that it suits you am I the jerk  I think op is not the jerk and if anything people   are just uncomfortable with it because I mean it's  just too darn real but I think op said nothing but   the truth and did nothing but okay things and  to comment on op saying we have a very generic   surname so they didn't worry about fing each other  I'm assuming this is Facebook and let me tell you   dude whatever background tracking Facebook has you  just type in the name of a relative that you have   no connection to but you know is your relative  and they'll just pop up at the top of the search   results they got some serious data collection and  connection stuff going on people who don't even   have a Facebook account have a shadow data  identifier our next story is from confusion   quirky 7381 am I the jerk for telling my husband  to get over himself before he alienates our older   daughter my husband and I have been married for  21 years and we have three three children together   two daughters ages 16 and 15 and a son who's 13  my husband and I have always had a good marriage   and are very similar in many ways except one our  taste and names my husband's always favored a more   traditional and classic name while I preferred a  name like my own more different and out there and   modern when it came to naming our children there  were no names we both liked so we compromised my   husband named our oldest I named our second  child and her son was given a first name by   my husband and a middle name by me our oldest has  never liked her name she asked to change it a few   times over the years asking for a name more like  her sister my husband would tell her how beautiful   her name was and how it was meaningful because  it represented her family she said It felt boring   and old in the last 2 years she's been more open  about this and has brought it to our attention   many times after she found a name she loves and  has been using and wants to use recently she sat   us down and asked that we consider letting her  change it before she turns 18 so she can start   off her adult life with less paperwork needing  to be changed and less Hoops to jump through my   husband shot it down hard he told her that she has  a beautiful name and that she'll be thankful for   it in a few years when she enters the professional  world and wants to be taken seriously our daughter   pointed out that I never had trouble he told her  that he gave her the name with love with thought   and tied her to several family members when she  pressed more he told her the decision was Final   I told her we would discuss it and talk to her  again my husband said no way once we were alone I   told him to get over himself that I understood  he loved her name as it is now and had poured   love into choosing your name but he's not the one  who has to live with it and I pointed out that he   will alienate her by refusing point blank to even  consider it and to take such a hard stance which   implied quite strongly that even if she changed  her name at 18 he would still call her by the name   he gave her he said that is exactly what he would  do and I told him that everything I said needed to   be emphasized then he said I couldn't talk because  all our kids apparently favor my taste and names   and he might as well have not have chosen any  names or cared at all I could tell he was upset   he felt somewhat personally rejected by it so I'm  now questioning if I am the jerk I think op is not   the jerk and this is just something that it might  hurt for them you know it might suck to basically   feel like a choice you made wasn't liked frankly I  get why that hurts probably hurts quite a lot but   at 16 they know they want to change their name  they're coming to you to help them to make it   easier on them in the future as long as they're  not trying to go change their name to like bong   or something this is something that the husband  needs to get through their feelings get over it   and learn to support and love their kid who has  to live with the name name and our final story   of the day is from flashy kangaroo 7890 am I the  jerk for not wanting my partner's best friend's   input or her as a bridesmaid in our wedding I'm  female 29 my partner Jay 31-year-old male wants   me to include his best friend H 36-year-old female  as a bridesmaid in our wedding H and I used to get   along a couple of years ago but she told Jay that  she doesn't like me a while back I've never been   rude to H and I'm always polite and civil when  she's over especially for Jay's sake because   I know that H is one of Jay's closest friends I  still talk to her say hi and bye but I don't class   her as a friend especially when she's polite  to me but we'll talk about me saying how she   doesn't like me behind my back Jay and I recently  got engaged and we're currently fighting because   he wants H to be a bridesmaid in our wedding but I  don't want her to be I don't want someone to input   opinion and be part of my hen night especially  if she doesn't like me because I want our wedding   and the time leading up to it to be drama free  and I know it'll just cause drama having someone   who doesn't like me as part of my bride's party  Jay keeps insisting to get H's opinions and not   my friends who I want as a part of my wedding  party and he keeps getting angry and treating   me like I'm the jerk for this I've told Jay that  if he wants her opinion to make her a part of his   wedding party but he won't I then said we could  possibly wait until closer to the wedding date to   see if H and I become friends again but I honestly  don't feel as if that will happen I am starting to   feel a bit like a jerk because it is his wedding  as well and maybe I should just put up with it for   his sake so Reddit am I the jerk this actually  highlights a really interesting issue where the   groom has a female friend that isn't on great  terms with the bride it's like well they should   probably still be invited to the party but they're  not going to be invited to the bachelor party   probably and the bride shouldn't be saddled with  just just sucking it up because they're friends of   the groom I don't think Opie's The Jerk here but I  don't know what a great solution would be besides   just not having them be a part of the parties and  probably not be a bridesmaid I don't know Welcome   Friends to another r/ am my The Jerk your video  would you be the jerk for making your own kid   walk home from the hospital we'll find out but  first a story from Sarah Jake 2022 am I the jerk   for flipping out of my fiance for canceling all  the vegan food options from our wedding food menu   behind my back my fiance 31-year-old male and I  25-year-old female are getting married soon there   wasn't that much disagreed on during the wedding  planning except for food me and my family are   vegans and there's so many reasons why we chose  this lifestyle and one of them being that we   have a history of health issues my fiance and his  family are the complete opposite they're hardcore   meat eaters which is fine by me obviously however  when deciding on the wedding food menu I wanted   to add four to five vegan options my fiance and  his mom objected saying it was a waste of money   over food that isn't real food they also argued  that this would be offensive for their guests and   suggested my vegan options just be the good old  salad and appetizers his mom wanted cupcakes I   said no because for one it's me and my family  who's paying and two I want to make my guest   feel welcome and not be treated as second class  citizens by being served sad my fiance made a face   and said isn't that what vegans eat I refused to  argue about it and said it was Final the other day   I found out that he had cancelled all the vegan  options and took them off the menu completely   and behind my back I was seething I called him at  work but he kept hanging up on me I went straight   to his workplace and confronted him there and  just flipped out on him he was stunned to see me   he at first said it was his mom's idea then told  me to go home because I was making his a scene   at the office the fight continued at home and he  defended himself by saying that I sort of made him   resort to doing this after I kept brushing off his  thoughts and input and refusing to accommodate for   his family but there were plenty of meat options  why can't I get Fortify vegan options when I'm   paying for it he yelled that it was his wedding  too not my family's my family said it was fine   and they'll figure it out and told me to let it  go but I refused am I the jerk for putting my foot   down on this I think it's safe to say that op is  not the jerk here I mean let alone the fact that   they went behind their back it's just what's the  actual issue with having vegan meals I just can't   fathom why it's so stigmatized for any of you guys  that are watching that aren't vegan or vegetarian   if you went to a wedding or an event and you  found out they served only vegan options would   that bother you in any way I'd like to know what  you guys think down in the comments below our next   story is from practical Grand 6104 am I the jerk  for telling my wife it's ridiculous to cry over   soup my wife is 4 months pregnant with our fifth  child we have a 7-year-old girl a 6-year-old girl   a 4-year-old boy and a 2-year-old boy now since  Child Care is so expensive she's been staying home   money's tight right now and her car broke down so  we've been relying on mine she texted me and told   me that she was craving a particular can of soup  so I bought it and brought it home she placed it   on the counter and said she would make it after  she gave the kids a bath while she was upstairs   my dad dad came over and mentioned he was hungry  so I told him to help himself to anything in the   kitchen as we had made dinner shortly before well  he ended up leaving to go home and my wife came   downstairs then I heard her frantically searching  for something I asked what she was doing and she   was looking for the soup she left out I told her  I haven't seen it and that my dad came over but   he doesn't usually eat canned foods I called him  and he admitted that he did in fact take it and   that he was sorry because he was unaware she was  safe it when I told her this she started sobbing   and saying she can never have one thing in this  house and how bad she was craving it and wanting   it so bad she cried for almost an hour over it  later I told her she was being ridiculous and   that she was an adult and crying over something  as stupid as a can of soup was for children she   told me I didn't understand and she's feeling  very emotional lately and stressed I talked to   my mom who told me I needed to give her grace and  that my words were very aish am I the jerk I knew   we were already heading down a really bad path  when the story opened with my wife is 4 months   pregnant I'm of the opinion that if you're deeply  pregnant and you're craving some type of food and   you experience the tragic death of that food when  it was nearly in your grasp you can cry over it   pregnancy is a stressful and emotional thing and  I don't blame anybody that's undergoing it crying   over a can of soup honestly from what I've heard  it sounds kind of par for the course the only   thing surprising me here is they have a 7-year-old  a 6-year-old a 4-year-old and a 2-year-old and   op hasn't learned by now this next story is  from extension charge 9781 am I the jerk for   yelling at my girlfriend for baking a dessert for  a dinner party I 26-year-old male have been dating   my girlfriend Rosie 23-year-old female for a year  now Rosie and my mother do not get along it's just   about the fact that their personality differences  are so large my mom's a more conservative and   reserved person and Rosie's the opposite of that  my mom's a really picky person and has never been   happy with anyone I date over the years but  I usually ignore her because it's not her   life yes I always shut down my mother's snarky  comments about anyone I date onto the problem   tomorrow night my mother's hosting a dinner party  for everyone in our family I'm not sure about the   other families and cultures but usually when we  throw dinner parties everyone will bring something   I thought this was the perfect time for Rosie and  my mom to get along better I told Rosie that she   should home make something I also made something  my mother hates anything sweet so I told Rosie to   refrain from baking any desserts Rosie said that  she wanted to bake something because it's what   she does best when it comes to the kitchen I told  her to look up a recipe on Google she was quiet   and about an hour later I come downstairs because  I could smell something sweet and I found Rosie   piping macaron batter I freaked out I started  yelling about how I told her specifically not   to make anything sweet because this was her one  chance to get on my mother's good side and I feel   like she only made the dessert to be Petty she  got upset and told me not to raise my voice at her   and that she wasn't doing it to be Petty she just  doesn't care what my mother thinks of her and that   my mother's not the only guest at the dinner party  I got frustrated and made the mistake of telling   her to stay home instead and she told me that she  would and that she now wouldn't go no matter what   even if I changed my mind I regret telling her  that because if she doesn't go my mother will   really not like her but am I the jerk for telling  her not to bake something sweet now I don't think   Opie is the jerk for saying hey you shouldn't  bake something sweet but if they really want to   and they frankly don't care what Opie's mom thinks  well they might have a disagreement as far as what   Opie thinks they should do but it's not worth a  blow up and an argument and a direct attack like   well maybe you should just stay home then it's  clearly not op's intent and prerogative but in   an indirect way it's kind of like op is playing  mama boy trying to get their partner to walk on   eggshells when going to a party our next story  is from throw away 72828 29292 am I the jerk for   getting matching tattoos with my best friend after  his girlfriend told me it made her uncomfortable   so basically I 19-year-old female have been best  friends with Devon 20-year-old male since we were   teenagers around 13 or 14 years old we've been  extremely close since then and this friendship   means more to me than any other relationship in my  life when we were around 16 he casually said hey   maybe we should get matching tattoos to remind  us that we're always there for each other and   I said it sounded cool and it wasn't really  mentioned again we were miners so it wasn't   exactly plausible but recently we passed a tattoo  place and I joked remember when we were younger   and we wanted to get matching tattoos which led to  a discuss leading up to us deciding that we wanted   to do it for real we took a few days to decide on  the design my friend's a graphic designer so she   made it for us but it's basically a light bulb  shaped like a heart with the words I'll be your   light love you always sort of woven through  the image the light bulb thing is an inside   thing between us and we always say love you or  I love you so it wasn't anything off-putting   and then the day before the appointment was  scheduled Devon's girlfriend Bianca came up to   me hysterically saying that we couldn't go through  with the tattoos I'm assuming Devon must have told   her she didn't really give me any room to speak  but she talked a lot about how uncomfortable the   idea made her they'd been in an extremely serious  relationship for a while and he was starting to   consider proposal but I told her that I was still  getting the tattoo as Devon had been an important   part of my life for years and mental L to me and  the tattoo was our idea together not just mine   obviously we went through with it and it felt  really nice for a while until Bianca called me   and started freaking out apparently I'm a horrible  person and the tattoo was too romantic even though   it was not we're just extremely close friends  I'm sure she has friends she would say I love   you too it's not a big deal but now she's saying  she wants it to be removed and I really don't know   what to do because on one hand I don't want to  be responsible for ruining Devon's relationship   and possible marriage but on the other hand I  I don't want to get rid of the tattoo this is   a really weird situation honestly and I can only  go from how I would personally feel and I would   say personally both sides are the jerks here for  op to say oh this heart-shaped light bulb that   says I'll be your light love you always is not  romantic at all I just wouldn't be able to have   those words said to my face and take it seriously  intent or not that is a very romantic looking   tattoo that's the kind of we've been married for  10 years and we're doubling down on the commitment   type tattoo on the other side Devon might be  a bit of a jerk for getting that tattoo when   it clearly upsets their partner so much and their  partner is also kind of a jerk for outright going   and just demanding that you get it removed I don't  know what to think here honestly it's all kinds of   mixed up and weird Vibes what do you guys think  is op the jerk here is everybody The Jerk I'd   like to know what you guys think because this  could be really touchy depending on what angle   you come from this next story is from ta IOP am I  the jerk for having an operation in the same week   as my work colleague's wedding causing my manager  to cancel her time off I'm in my late 20s and work   in a large retail chain I have a work colleague  Candace 22 to 23-year-old female who's planning   on getting married later this month originally  she was planning the wedding for 2020 however   due to lockdowns Etc it had to be postponed to  2022 she's booked 2 weeks off for her wedding   and for her honeymoon nearly 2 years in advance  and everything is paid for me and Candace work   in the same store section white goods now I had  bad eyesight as long as I can remember myself and   was finally able to save for an operation upon  the checkup the doctor said the operation must   happen sooner rather than later they explained  that they can see a small rupture in one of my   eyes and they're worried that if I fall down or  hit my head or due to stress it'll become worse   and they won't be able to fix it which would make  me unel for an operation due to this the operation   was scheduled for the time of Candace's wedding  when I've told my boss that I'll need two weeks   off for the same week they declined my request  saying it's too short notice and Candice already   booked it off so us two can't be off at the same  time I had to go through the doctor to have a   note stating I'll be having an operation and due  to recovery will not be able to work for those   2 weeks and legally it is not something my boss  can decline because of this and since Candace's   wedding is more than 2 weeks away he canel her  holiday request she can't get any refunds at   such short notice and she said she'll take unpaid  leave in this case however our boss said he won't   be granting her any leave as we're underst staffed  someone started their maternity leave recently and   if she won't show up then they'll treat it as an  unauthorized absence which will lead to dismissal   during our shift Candace had a go at me and called  me a massive jerk for scheduling the operation   during her wedding and getting signed off making  her even more stressed before the wedding some   other colleagues believe I'm in the wrong too and  should have chosen different dates am I the jerk I   think op is clearly not the jerk here if anybody  should be mad at anybody Candice should be mad   at their work honestly the fact that they can go  and just uncan a holiday that you've already got   scheduled off is kind of ridiculous I don't know  if op shared what their deal is with Candice but   if Candace knows that op has a very serious and  Urgent and critical eye surgery coming up that   just can't be ignored for an extra couple weeks  because it might permanently impact their Vision   otherwise then Candace would be a major piece of  work this next story is from throw ra economy 550   am I the jerk for returning home after I found out  that my husband booked first class for him and his   friend while I got economy my husband and I 30s  haven't been on a trip out of country for years   while he goes every year with his best friend his  reasons for going with him is because they both   go to attend sporting events this year my husband  told me I could go with him and his friend since   they were visiting a new destination he paid for  my ticket and everything else since I'm a stay at   home mom and have no job the kids were left with  my mom however when I found out that he had booked   first class for himself and his friend while  I got economy I just couldn't hold my tongue I   confronted him about it and he at first refused  to discuss then when the argument got heated he   yelled I paid for your ticket for freak's sake  isn't that enough then kept on about how I should   stop acting like I was royalty and that if I come  to think about it even econom is fine for me since   I technically don't work anyway I cried because  of what he said but decided to just not go all   together he changed his tone and started begging  me to just go with what he planned but I declined   I went to pick the kids up from my mom's house  and he came back through 3 hours later huffing   and buffing about what happened his friend sent  me a text calling me entitled and said this was   the reason why he didn't want my husband to take  me with them and I just proved his point I didn't   respond but I blocked him since he's gotten  increasingly rude over the past few months he   my husband said I kept crying about being excluded  and this is what happens when he finally decides   to include me am I the jerk for not settling  for economy by the way he's perfectly capable   of financing the trip how can you even call it  being included if you don't even sit together   in the plane and let me guess when they get there  he and his friend are going to take the hotel room   and she's going to get the Motel 6 back down the  road ways right I don't know if it's too far of me   but I would start questioning if there's something  more going on between those two friends especially   considering the friends Behavior afterwards where  they keep texting you and calling you entitled it   just seems overly defensive and something that  might be motivated by other reasons our next   stories from shift dry 9280 am I the jerk for  cutting my portion sizes in half at the dinner   table after being served heaping portions by my  mom growing up my family and I were all fat they   never taught me about good nutrition portion sizes  and the only exercise I got was gym class so of   course I was used to all this right especially  since a lot of my friends were the same when I   went to college I was exposed to a lot of new  things and I learned quickly that my family's   habits weren't healthy for years they always  said the weight was genetic when I'd go to lunch   with my friend group at the dining hall I started  noticing that my portion sizes were huge against   theirs I cut down my portions and I would join  them doing yoga and stuff naturally I ended up   losing some weight like size 22 to tight size 12  I really like the way I look you can see my collar   bones but I ended up having to go back home during  summer break and I have been surprised urised at   just how different I feel for my family when we  would order pizzas 2 years ago we would basically   get our own and it would be gone that night we had  pizza night when I got home and I ate two slices   and that was it last week my mom made her special  lasagna I made a size salad to go with it she   always plates the meals and then sets a big dish  in the middle so we can have more well the piece   she gave me was way too big so I cut it in half  and served myself more salad my sister immediately   got on my case about how rude that was to mom  because she worked so hard on the lasagna I said I   couldn't eat that much food in one sitting and she  scoffed and said that didn't used to be a problem   I said yes but if you can't tell things have  changed a little she got in my face and said that   I brought my college BS home with me and I should  have left it at the door and ate like a normal   person I told her that I was eating like a normal  person that everyone I knew at school eats like   this and that we're the abnormality that it's it's  not normal to be so stuffed at the table you're   in pain my brother chimed in saying that i' just  gained the weight back so stop pretending that I'm   better than they are but I don't think I am at all  I'm no better than anyone but I also don't think   I'm wrong for sticking to smaller portions instead  of being stuffed all the time am I the jerk well   no wonder everybody in that family's overweight  if somebody actually tries to be healthy they pass   their insecurities on to them and basically make  it such a negative thing to even bring a health   focused attitude into that household I would  hate to hear what that family has to say when   you ask them about vegans or vegetarians their  entire existence is probably a huge joke to those   kinds of people our next story is from otherwise  job 8545 am I the jerk for telling my ex-husband   I won't babysit my daughter my ex-husband and I  divorced about 4 years ago I've taken a couple of   vacations with the kids since the divorce he went  on one trip with them which was canceled after one   one day due to a hurricane he makes a lot of snide  remarks about how much I pay for the vacations but   I live a pretty Frugal life and my kids are my  Splurge we have 50/50 custody and neither of us   pay child support my ex has family in Texas they  live on a lake with an inground pool in a boat   they're close with him he has a standing invite  the trip would cost my ex a flight probably one   or two meals out my ex seems to be buying a new  truck bought a onewheel joined a golf club and   make solid money I don't think he's hurting and I  don't begrudge him any of it I just wish he'd take   my two kids on the vacation they desperately want  with him but I respect that he has every right to   spend his money how he wants to here's where it  gets weird Monday he asked me what I'm doing for   Labor Day which according to our divorce agreement  is his holiday with the kids I don't have plans so   he asked if I could babysit I roll my daughter so  he can take my son to Texas I asked why he wasn't   going to take my daughter and he said the trip  is my son's birthday present and if my daughter   asks to go to Texas for her birthday he'll take  her alone my kids are close and if asked I know   my son wouldn't want to go without his sister I  told him I didn't want to put the kids in that   position and he should ask his girlfriend lives  with them been together four years stays with   the kids when he travels for work to just stay  at home with her but apparently she's going on   the trip too I told him it was playing favorites  and I wouldn't enable it and he blew up on me we   have a history of him being abusive so I know I  can be very quick to jump to conclusions and get   protective of my kids I know this would hurt my  daughter but maybe I'm overreacting he called me   controlling and I'm trying to decide if he has  any basis for that statement note if he books   the trip without her I will 100% watch her and he  knows it I think Opie is not the jerk here I have   never been a parent but I feel like if you have  two kids especially two kids that are very close   both in age and relationship taking only one of  them definitely gives a favoritism feel whether   you like it or not and frankly I think it's weird  to just take one kid I know it's their birthday   but why would you not want to give both of your  kids that experience what motivation or reasoning   do they have to leave one kid home they just don't  want to take care of two kids favoritism you be   the judge our next story is from I'm a 35-year-old  white man am I the jerk for saying it's disgusting   to shower twice a week for context my boyfriend's  sister was complaining to me that her boyfriend   has stinky skin you know where we're quite close  and I never repeat this stuff to her brother and   I asked her if he cleans under it when he showers  to which she said yes and then I asked her how   many times he showers to which she said twice a  week personally I shower once a day maybe I'll   miss the occasional day in a week if I'm really  tired but it's usually only a day to this I said   oh that's disgusting twice a week is nowhere near  enough and then she got super offended and hurt   because she also only showers twice a week because  she wants to preserve the natural oils on her skin   I tried to backtrack to keep the piece but she  knows it's BS and now she won't talk to me she's   been off with me for a few days and I can't even  discuss why with my boyfriend because how am I   supposed to tell him his beloved sister has a  boyfriend with a stinky you know what am I the   jerk for this I'm not sure if I should apologize  to her and all honesty she doesn't smell but I   still think the twice a week rule is ridiculous  because you still get that buildup of sweat and   dirt and I don't think washing twice a week is  sustainable to keep it off I think op's reaction   does make them the jerk here it's something that  I think they should go to her and apologize and   say all their life they did it a certain way  and they had a misconception about if it's   really enough and they apologize for upsetting  them the bottom line is it depends really on the   person how much you can shower and stay properly  clean honestly the boyfriend probably could shower   twice a week and still stay clean if they did  some additional hygiene practices for some you   could say hot zones I mean the bottom line is it  clearly works for her at least and nobody likes to   feel like they're judged like that so I think  it's at least worth an apology our next story   is from angry and tired 11 am I the jerk for  kicking strangers out of my mom's hospice room   at 1:00 a.m. my mother's currently in hospice I  flew across the country to be with her till the   end I have an older sister that lives with my  mother when I got here my sister said that she   had a friend that would like to visit my mom but  didn't have transportation my mom said she wanted   to see him so I drove 30 minutes an hour and 10  minutes round trip to get this man and bring him   back when I got there I found out that his husband  was also coming both these men were strangers to   me but I did it so he could see my mom one last  time the plan we agreed on was I would take them   home at 8:00 p.m. because I had to pick up our  other sister from the airport and they were on   the way when the time came to leave the man and  his husband had some sort of emotional meltdown   and didn't want to leave my mother I told them  that I didn't have time to deal with their drama   because I had to get to the airport so I just left  when I made it back to the hospice with my other   sister it was 1:00 a.m. the the two of us walked  in and there were now four people and our oldest   sister in the room our mom was sleeping but they  were laughing joking and watching a loud video on   someone's phone I asked who the new people were  and a woman said she and her boyfriend were here   as emotional support for my mom's friend they just  showed up to surprise him what the freak it's 1:00   a.m. and these people didn't know my mother or our  family my mother's never liked many men around her   so there was no way she would be okay with with  three strangers watching her on her deathbed my   oldest sister didn't see anything wrong with them  being here I was so Furious because that was just   the most disrespectful thing I had ever seen they  were not family nor were they here to support our   family I was so Furious that I told everyone to  shut up and leave I was so enraged and I don't   remember exactly what I said but it was not nice  my oldest sister went out in the lobby sobbing and   made a huge commotion she went on a rant about  how our mom loved this friend and how she saved   him from a bad situation we all almost got kicked  out of hospice for disturbing the other patients   thankfully the staff agreed with me and allowed  myself and the sister I just picked up to stay   everyone else had to leave I received a text  shortly after telling me how awful I was for   kicking them out my oldest sister also said I was  in the wrong because her mother wanted an Irish   wake we're not Irish and she's not dead yet you  don't let strangers have a party in her hospice   room at 1:00 a.m. so am I the jerk the bottom line  here I think is op was looking out for their mom   and solely their mom so I don't think they can be  the jerk here as much as everybody else would try   to make op the bad guy for kicking them out  frankly all of these people that have to be   kicked out probably aren't going to be thinking  of op nicely anyways our next story is from aita   bridesmaid drama am I the jerk for kicking the  bridesmaid off my destination wedding the day   before the event this happened a while ago but  the person involved reached out for an apology   for me yet I don't believe I did anything wrong  short background I have a best friend Nia who's   black and comes from one of the least developed  countries in central Africa I've known and loved   her for many years so when planning my wedding I  didn't have any doubts that she'll be my maid of   honor I invited another girl Jane who I knew  for not that long but we were quite close to   be one of my bridesmaides due to all my friends  living in different countries trees Nia and Jane   only met for the first time the day before my  wedding which they both traveled to attend this   night before the wedding we had a lovely time with  the girls but then Jane started to ask Nia really   strange questions like do they really eat insects  and live in Huts which was yes strange but also   can be seen as a curiosity of another country but  as the evening progressed Jane's Behavior did as   well Jane ended up telling NAA a story about some  beggar she had seen referring to him by the nword   that's when I decided to intervene got Jane in  private and asked what in the world thought she   could talk like this let alone to Nia she became  defensive and quoted Nia is not the nword she's   so pretty and clean I was talking about that guy  after telling her off and explaining what kind of   racist butt she is in much Rudder form I asked her  to leave and to not show up at my wedding as well   as never talk to me again last night she reached  out expecting the apology and a payback for the   flight she took for my wedding which I really  doubt I should do as I'm still very angry with   her I don't want to discuss it with my friends  so please rdit tell me if I'm the jerk Opie's not   the jerk op saved every single person that had  to associate with them some serious time if op   at their wedding ever has a thought of Jane come  across their mind that should only serve to make   them laugh and enjoy the night even more because  because they're not there and our final story   of the day is from ta drink drama am I the jerk  for making my son walk home after he was in the   hospital I'm female my son Jay 19-year-old male  is staying home from college I know my son goes   to parties drinks like someone innocent his age  so every time he goes out I ask him not to overdo   it and not to drive if he drinks he usually does  what I ask Saturday there was a graduation party   at a college in my town and he got an invite to  the party since I knew he was going to drink I   confiscated his keys and he took the Uber to the  party always giving him the same warning not to   overdo it around 6:00 a.m. I didn't pay attention  to the time because it's very common for him to   sleep unannounced at friends houses I got a call  saying that Jay was hospitalized and I went into   despair speeding to the hospital by car when I  arrived they informed me that he had an alcoholic   coma and luckily there was no sequel I preferred  not to scold him but I admit I was frustrated and   disappointed by his inconsequentiality so after  he was discharged from the hospital I asked him if   he could walk he said yes and asked the doctor if  there was any problem with him walking he said he   just has to go a little slow we left the hospital  and I told him he would have to walk home 2 km   away because if he was old enough to go into an  alcoholic coma he's able to get home by himself   and I left him there it wasn't dark but I could  hear him complaining and saying it was unfair he   arrived 40 minutes later complaining to the walls  about how cruel I was in making him walk after he   was in the hospital and that he can't ask for an  Uber because he' lost his cell phone he was with   his friend my husband not his father the father  agrees with me said that I was pretty hard on him   and that maybe it wasn't the best way to deal with  it am I the jerk my son's fully capable of walking   2 km he's already walked six to kiss a girl I  think op is pretty clearly The Jerk here I fully   understand wanting to have some kind of reprimand  for your kid being so reckless but honestly I'm of   the opinion that this is the one situation where  you need to put that aside and just show them that   you're fully there to support them and help them I  fully subscribe to the belief that parents should   do the free pass method where you basically  sit your kid down and say listen I know you're   probably going to get in trouble if there's a  situation where things are going haywire you're in   some deep stuff I don't care what contact me I'll  get you no questions asked no trouble because the   idea is them being scared enough to contact you in  that situation is probably punishment enough and   enough of a Learning lesson op Sun here ending  up in the hospital like this I feel like that   should serve as lesson enough I feel like the poor  19-year-old kid has experienced enough and forcing   them to walk 2 km home on top of everything thing  is just a bit ridiculous am I the jerk for cutting   off support to my daughter I 52-year-old male have  three children with my ex Tracy 50-year-old female   Michael 28-year-old male Linda 25-year-old female  and Victoria 23-year-old female we split because   Tracy had an affair with Stan a 55-year-old male  to whom she's now married we never shared with the   kids the reason for the divorce as I don't want  them to blame either of us this backfired as the   kids saw saw their mom move out of the house into  a small apartment and me keep living in the house   and Remar 2 years after the divorce so they saw  me as the bad guy Stan and Tracy let them pretty   much do whatever they wanted and I had to be the  disciplinarian who made sure homework was done   appointments were made and deadlines were met  my two oldest eventually came to realize that   I wasn't the bad guy my son when he found out  that his mother had put nothing away for college   for him as outlin in our divorce decree and she  told them to take out loans my daughter when she   realized that her grades were going to keep her  out of her desired program in school my youngest   never came around so it was a surprise when her  boyfriend asked for my blessing to ask for her   hand when I expressed that I didn't think she'd  care about my blessing he said she insisted on it   she began spending time with me being polite  to my wife and it felt wonderful to have my   daughter back I went with them to book the venue  and they'll be getting married next summer I I pay   the deposit in the first installment I noticed  that she was becoming less communicative again   recently ignoring my texts or giving one-word  replies and not coming over as much on Monday   my son sent me a post from Instagram my youngest  had an engagement party this weekend to which I   was not invited one of the photos was with her and  Stan and it read anyone can be a father it takes   a real man to be a dad this amazing guy has been  my dad for 15 years years even though he didn't   have to be I am so blessed to have him walk me  down the aisle next year # Daddy's girl # future   Mrs X my kids wanted for nothing their entire  lives because I never let them go without even   when they wouldn't talk to me I made sure their  needs were met I texted Tracy to ask why I wasn't   included she replied that Victoria didn't want  my wife there because she wanted a drama-free   day my wife has literally never started drama  in her life I asked if Stan and I would both be   walking or down the aisle Tracy didn't respond but  Victoria called me up demanding to know what my   problem was I repeated my question and she replied  that no Stan her dad would be walking her down the   aisle I told her that if that's what she wanted  I would be fine with it I told her to let Stan   know the next payment for the wedding is due in  November Stan and Tracy don't have the money for   this wedding and think I'm being the jerk Linda  says if I do this Victoria will never never speak   to me again Michael's on my side I'm going to be  honest it might be Petty but I think it's time to   tell them the truth about the situation here and  op's feelings about how they felt cut off when all   along they never just wanted to make anybody the  bad guy I don't think they're the jerk either way   for cutting off the funds when they're not even  being invited and are being basically outcasted by   their own kid especially when apparently from what  op said they've never acted in a way that deserves   being being outcasted it almost feels like there's  something wrong here because why is somebody who   loves and supports their kid being pushed away  like this also it's pretty clear they used op for   the money what do you guys think after everything  is it finally time to explain to the kids why the   divorce happened and explaining that op was not  the bad guy in that decision let me know what   you guys think in the comments down below our  next stories from hidden concert would I be the   jerk for not sending a gift for a wedding I wasn't  invited to my cousin Ted and I are close in age a   few years apart we were always close as kids and  even into adulthood still kept in touch then Ted   met Maddie a few years ago and started bringing  her to family stuff I don't have a problem with   Maddie but we just didn't click we talk at family  stuff but she's not someone I want to hang out   with or become friends with my other cousin Ted's  sister really clicked with Maddie which cool and   good for them but I just don't I'm nice and polite  but I don't go out of my way to become her pesty   my aunt Ted's mom really pushed her on me though I  don't know if it's because we're the same aish or   what but it was annoying anytime we were both at  an event she'd find some way to push us together   I felt like a little kid being forced to play  with someone my own college graduation party   grandparents had it because they have a bigger  house and yard had to be moved because Maddie   had to work and it wouldn't be nice to exclude  her even though it was inconvenient for me and   meant most of my my friends couldn't come and I  had to rush around anyway like I said I've never   been rude or anything to her just never really  bonded with her so Ted and Maddie are getting   married soon I knew he was engaged but I didn't  know where the wedding was when it was another   family member asked what I was getting them for  a wedding gift and I said I don't know they said   better figure it out before wedding date which is  very soon I said oh I didn't know I wasn't invited   they said well maybe it's not personal you should  still get a gift for them I asked my dad when he   got his invitation and I guess it was a while ago  I said it's crappy that I wasn't invited when I   had to reschedule my party for them he said that  was a graduation party this is a wedding now that   you know about it just be a bigger person and get  a gift don't be Petty I don't want to buy them a   gift and I probably won't invite Ted to any future  events I have I don't know why I was left out when   everyone else in the family was invited maybe  because I'm the only cousin on this side maybe   it's a budget thing and not personal but I don't  want to spend the money on a gift when I wasn't   cool enough to invite to me it's like having a  birthday party and expecting someone I didn't   invite to send me a birthday present am I the  jerk if I don't send a gift I am of the opinion   that if you are not invited you are not welcomed  into that ceremony you don't have to send a gift   I think Opie's analog is great if you throw a  birthday party and you don't invite somebody you   don't expect a gift from them send a nice card or  something but you don't have to get them anything   crazy our next story is from imaginary agency 991  am I the jerk for not wanting to be a stay-at-home   mom okay I already know it sounds bad but I  35-year-old female and my husband Jeff 37-year-old   male are currently expecting a boy his first child  my second I got pregnant with my first when I was   18 and his dad was never in the picture I work as  a substance abuse counselor and love my job this   is where it gets tricky my job offered me 8 weeks  PTO for when I have our son I've been so happy   because I didn't want to go right back to work  soon me and Jeff got together when I turned 30 and   he moved in with me because I own my house we just  got married this year and have talked about child   care multiple times so he knows I don't want to be  a stay-at-home mom well I'm due in November and he   just brought the idea up I was very confused  because we've already talked about this but I   guess my mother-in-law and sister-in-law believe I  should stay home with our son as a mother and wife   I just don't understand where their opinions come  in because I already know where they stand both of   them stay at home with the kids all three of them  sat me down to have this talk and they want me to   focus on the kids cleaning up the house making  dinner and all of that but I already work and do   those things well mother-in-law wanted to throw it  in my face that I never got to be a stay-at-home   mom because I was a single mom going to school and  working which she's not wrong but it definitely   made me pissed that she brought it up I told him  that I worked so hard to give my son a good life   and having another baby doesn't change my decision  to keep doing something that I absolutely love   doing and if they all want someone to take care  of the house and kids all day then Jeff should be   a stay-at-home dad because I make more money than  him and it would make more sense for him to stay   home instead of me it turned absolutely horrible  after that I got yelled at said by mother-in-law   and sister-in-law that it's not his role as a  father to do those things that he's the man of the   house and should be the one making the money Jeff  just stood there not saying anything and I blew up   and reminded all of them that it's my house not  his I kicked mother-in-law and sister-in-law out   and Jeff is so mad at me that he went with them  he said he won't come back till I apologize to all   three of them so am I the jerk for not wanting to  be a stay-at-home mom I don't think gop's the jerk   for not wanting to be a stay-at-home mom I think  what matters is can you make it work if you can   make it work where you go to work and you still  take care of your kids then that's more than fine   I don't see why you have to do that you don't have  to be stuck in the 1950s nuclear family role our   next story is from puppy aita am I the jerk for  not taking a conversation about Parenthood with   my wife seriously this sounds ridiculous because  it is I 27-year-old male don't want children   I've never wanted children my wife Liz 26-year-old  female is aware of this I'm in the camp of if it's   not a resounding I want this with my entire heart  and soul yes then it's a no I think kids are cool   and wonderful and major sources of joy in life  do I want to be responsible for raising one nope   prior to getting engaged about a year and a half  ago I lived with my best friend 28-year-old male   and had done so for nearly a decade of my life he  and I each adopted a dog while living together and   call each other Co parents we have doggy playdates  on the regular and I'm over at his place multiple   times a week because of this this morning my wife  brought up children like I said she's aware of the   fact that I don't want them her sister recently  gave birth to our niece and while looking at the   photos Liz said wouldn't it be nice if we had a  baby or something along those lines I responded   with I'm already the co-parent of two babies and I  don't have a room for anymore she got angry at me   and said I wasn't taking her or the con concept  of Parenthood seriously I told her I have no   reason to take this conversation or the concept  of our Parenthood seriously because we are never   having kids am I the jerk I think Opie is not the  jerk here and there might need to be a sitdown   conversation at some point because very clearly op  expressed they don't want kids they want a kidless   life and if this is something that op's wife is  going to secretly be longing for it's better to   put that out on the table and have it in the know  rather than bottle that up and have something   Brewing that is just kind of ignored this next  story is from poppy field 02 390 am I the jerk for   saying I won't make part of my family's lunches  anymore I 37-year-old female have four children   in a husband all my children are School aged 5 7  10 and 13 and my husband is 39 I make all of their   lunches for the next day for them it's usually  a PB&J chips and crackers and a yogurt every day   it's cheap easy and they all like it sometimes if  we have takeout or pizza or something the night   before and the member didn't finish their portion  they'll get it in their lunch the next day this   is especially the case for my 7-year-old who  doesn't eat much at once and will likely be the   case for my 5-year-old as she eats the same way  additionally sometimes I'll use a different jelly   or crunchy peanut butter with the creamy or use  honey instead of jelly or sub and use a turkey and   cheese plus the side is switched up regularly and  the yogurt flavor is always different so there's a   lot of variety within a sandwich side and a yogurt  with that being said I understand that having the   same thing over and over can get boring if I'm  asked to sub an item and I can I will this is   when my oldest started complaining about lunches  being boring in that complaining tone kids use I   wasn't hurt I asked what he would like instead and  he Shrugged and said something not boring at this   point my husband and second oldest joined echoing  the sentiment with no Solutions at this point I   was nearly crying which I don't do in front of  my kids but hearing my husband say these things   without any solutions hurt I said fine if they  find my lunches so boring then they don't have   to eat them and I won't make them anymore that  they're all welcome and old enough to make their   own lunches and I'll just make them for my two  youngest or my oldest kids can simply get school   lunches something they've been vehemently against  saying the meals are gross as I know those menus   are different every day and that will offer some  variety they immediately backtracked on their   statements but I stood firm they're all old enough  to make their own lunch just tell me if you decide   you need lunch money my older kids grumbled  but they managed to make their own sandwiches   my husband was the biggest child of them all  complaining that the kids have the option of   school lunch that the school can't and won't won't  let a kid go hungry but work doesn't give a freak   if he eats or not I just kissed his cheek and said  there's bread and peanut butter in the kitchen   not to mention he can drive to McDonald's and get  something he wants he continued to get angry and   slept in the basement last night am I the jerk  I think op's not the jerk because they're just   looking for a little appreciation here right  here they are doing stuff that honestly they   don't have to do and a lot of parents make their  kids make their own lunch and they're just dumping   on their parent and not providing any solutions  listen if you want a fruit rollup every day just   mention it if that's what makes it not boring if  you want a Capri Sun give them something that they   can do to make it not boring rather than just  say ah what you make is boring this next story   is from silly Mouse am I the jerk for refusing to  give my window seat to someone's kid months ago I   booked a Jet Blue flight from San Francisco to New  York City and realized I accumulated enough points   over the years to purchase a first class seat for  free I had the option to pick my seat and I always   choose the window even when I'm flying economy  I always pay the extra fee to select seats in   advance for one to ensure I'm not kicked off when  it's over booked later and two simply because I   like the window seat I'm a geography nerd and  enjoy looking out the window anyway the day of   the flight comes and a woman and her two kids are  assigned next to me in the first class cabin the   lady asked me if I could switch seats so her kid  could have the window if this was economy I would   probably switch so the kid could have the window  even though I would be miffed since I had selected   it in advance and the mother didn't however I  don't get to fly first class very often and was   looking forward to this flight so I simply said  no sorry the kid threw a fit the mother gave me a   glare and pretty much tried to Guilt Trip me into  switching but I just ignored her I might be a jerk   for refusing to give my first Class Window Seat to  a kid but at the same time every passenger has the   option to choose their seats in advance and if she  wanted the window seat for her kid she should have   reserved it in advance plus her kids are flying  first class some people never get to fly first   class in their lifetime my friend thinks I'm the  jerk so I'm turning to you Reddit am I the jerk I   think op is absolutely not the jerk I think if you  pay for a seat you deserve to get that seat darn   it Good Charity bad charity I don't care sorry kid  your mom doesn't love you enough to buy the window   seat also guys now is the best time to ask what  is the best seat on an airplane window middle or   aisle because I am a staunch window believer but  I know not everybody agrees let me know this next   story is from not my house AIT am I the jerk for  refusing to pay rent to my boyfriend's mortgage if   I move in with him my boyfriend 33-year-old male  and I 29-year-old female have been dating for 3   years he owns a house and lives there by himself  himself I live in an apartment by myself we've   talked about moving in together as that's the  logical next step in our relationship and we both   want to do it but I have some Hang-Ups related to  moving into a house that I don't have any stake   in I'm refusing to pay any money that would go  directly towards his mortgage I don't have any   stake in the house why would I contribute to his  mortgage payments I'm okay helping with utilities   groceries household items Etc but paying his more  mortgage is a hard no for me I just don't think   it makes any sense for me to pay towards his  mortgage when I would get nothing from that if   we were to break up his argument is that I would  essentially be living with him for free and it   would cause an uneven dynamic in our payment  towards shared living expenses which I kind of   get but at the same time he's the one benefiting  from paying down the mortgage and gaining Equity   not me he also argued that his mortgage is pretty  much exactly what I was paying paying in rent so   by cutting that in half I'm saving a lot of money  on living costs compared to living on my own which   yeah that's nice too but legally it's still not  my house I told him the only way I would pay money   for rent is if he signs a contract with me stating  that any money I pay towards his mortgage will be   paid back to me by him in the event that we break  up it would also allow me protection from eviction   and other basic tenant rights similar to a rental  agreement ment he's refusing to sign anything like   that because in his words I could break up with  him for no reason and then take him to court for   thousands of dollars which I suppose is true but  I wouldn't just break up with him for no reason   the whole situation is driving a wedge between us  and he's pissed at me for being so difficult when   all he thinks he's asking is that we split living  expenses 50/50 if we are to live together to me   it's not that simple when he's the one only owning  the house we would live in if I were on the title   it would be a different story but he's not willing  to put me on the title because he's lived there   for 7 years already my lease at my apartment  is up in 2 months and I know I need to make a   decision sooner than later it doesn't help that  my landlord's going to be increasing my rent and   similar apartments on our area are going for even  more than I'm currently paying but I just don't   feel right contributing money towards his mortgage  I also know that if I renew my lease it's pretty   much a dagger to our relationship which I don't  want because I do love him and see a future with   him I just want to make sure I'm protected I can  tell my boyfriend's patience on this is wearing   thin and he's upset with me for digging my heels  in on this but for me this is about protecting   myself for the worst case scenario while he's  not really risking anything this next story   is from fluffy strein 6713 am I the jerk for  not wanting to attend a Game of Thrones themed   wedding my friend Lex is getting married soon  she and her husband are extreme Game of Thrones   fans they've watched the show five plus times  their house is decked out with Game of Thrones   themed decorations and accessories Etc because  of their shared love of Game of Thrones Lex and   their fiance decided to have a Game of Thrones  themed wedding I'm perfectly fine with the idea   of a themed wedding I'm even okay with the Game  of Thrones dress in costume for the wedding the   only thing I can't seem to get behind is the fact  that the majority of the wedding will be conducted   in High Valyrian for those who don't know it's a  madeup language from Game of Thrones her wedding   is also a destination wedding and I'm finding it  hard to justify going out of my way to go to a   wedding that's not even in a real language that  I won't be able to understand am I the jerk if I   don't go I mentioned that I was having doubts  to Lex and she got really mad at me because I   originally had said I could go before I knew it  was in High Valyrian she's also been sending me   links to learn H Valyrian on du lingo and I feel  like even if I did show up she would be mad at   me for not learning it I think op is not the jerk  not necessarily because of the High Valyrian thing   but just because they're not really obligated  to attend any wedding especially a destination   wedding it's much easier to just say it's just  unrealistic to make it you can give them all your   love all the best and just simply not go you're  not forced to go our next story is from crab legs   and Prime am I the jerk for telling daughter I'm  disappointed in her and won't take her out to a   second restaurant my daughter's 14 and 16 are on  the same dance team their team won a competition   on Sunday and we were all so excited and proud of  them after the competition my dad suggested we go   out to eat and said he would pay for wherever  we wanted older daughter who loves Seafood has   been asking for years to go to a restaurant  that has unlimited crab legs but it is a very   pricey restaurant so we've never been able to  she immediately suggested this restaurant my   dad liked the suggestion my younger daughter  suggested we go to her favorite restaurant a   local Mexican restaurant instead we've been there  many times as it's much more affordable knowing   this would be a wasted opportunity I said older  daughter's suggestion made more sense because it   was somewhere we'd never been younger daughter  complained that she wouldn't like anything there   but I assured her the menu would have more than  crab legs we got there and sure enough there were   many dishes that didn't have seafood including  steak the youngest's favorite even though there   were dishes without Seafood youngest daughter  said she wasn't hungry because the restaurant   smelled weird I ordered her steak anyway younger  daughter pouted throughout the meal she picked   at her steak older daughter was very happy and  completely absorbed in the crab Lings my mom   tried to talk to my younger daughter about the  competition but she wasn't responsive at the end   end of the meal we were all stuffed except for the  youngest my dad told everyone to pick a dessert to   go except for the youngest because she's clearly  not hungry I asked my dad to leave her alone and   he did but she was already upset when we got  home I tried to talk to her I explained that   this was a rare opportunity and sometimes we need  to let someone else have something nice I told her   I could have taking us to the Mexican restaurant  this weekend she said it's not the same because   the restaurant we go to night of the competition  is special and we went somewhere she didn't like   I pointed out that she didn't know she didn't  like it because she didn't try it she said I   know she hates seafood and that the restaurant's  known for its Seafood so of course she wouldn't   want to go there after a special event she was  annoyed all Monday and Tuesday but started to   Mellow on Wednesday this morning she asked if  we're going to the Mexican restaurant tomorrow   I said not this week because of her behavior but  we'll see next week she wasn't happy am I being   too hard on her I think she was very rude to her  grandparents but I know when you're a teenager   Everything feels like a bigger deal than it is  should I have just let her behavior slide and   taken her to the Mexican restaurant I'm definitely  not a parenting expert but I think op is not the   jerk here and I think what they've done here is  actually really good I'm of the opinion that you   should not enable that kind of behavior at all  unless you want to foster a kid that grows up to   be py and complaining and Moody for multiple days  just so they can get what they want you don't want   to condition a kid who's just coming into their  own to ever repeat that kind of behavior even   when they're done being moody that doesn't mean  everybody else moves along with them our next   story is from beauty song storm am I the jerk for  telling my mom her stepdaughter is possessive and   she needs to do better to keep her away from me  my Mom married Jeff when I was 6 years old my dad   died 2 months earlier but my parents were divorced  at the time Jeff and his daughter Emma lived in   another state and all four of us moved to a new  place to start over I met Jeff and Emma 2 weeks   after my dad died mom made a fast move because she  now could with Dad not able to stop her right from   the get-go Emma's been clingy possessive and kind  of a little creepy too I didn't like her from the   first day we met because she told me Jeff was  my dad now and that I needed to learn how to   be a family with them because she wanted a sister  and a mom it set me so bad because I was missing   my dad he wasn't gone that long and I had this  strange girl telling me to replace him already   I told her that her dad wasn't my dad and I missed  my dad she told me she didn't care and things were   different I went to my mom who told me to give  Emma and Jeff a chance and said Emma likely got   over excited Emma has continuously made life so  awkward for me she insisted we share a bedroom   which my mom and Jeff said yes to despite having  a spare bedroom she started wearing my clothes and   telling me I could wear hers all fine with Mom  and Jeff she hated how I kept in touch with my   best friend from back home hated it even more when  a year later my best friend's family moved nearby   and we got to see each other again versus just  talking over the phone she was rude to her told   her to leave me alone told me I had to spend time  with her instead of my best friend Emma tore up   photos of my dad and told me that he was the past  and her and Jeff were the future she did get into   trouble for that but then I got into trouble for  not letting it go I was nine at the time I think   Emma tells everyone I'm her sister and we're so  close whereas I'm more honest with people I'm   close to and don't hold back on how unhappy I am  at home over the years nothing's changed much only   she's far more obsessive now Jeff doesn't like  me because he really doesn't like that I don't   consider him my dad and I'll be honest I don't  think of him as a parental figure even though I   know he is I don't love him and I hate Emma which  he also knows my mom's talked to me before about   being nicer to Emma and to stop pushing her away  so much she got on my case again about it because   I wouldn't go to camp with Emma we're both 16 now  by the way that she wanted to go to that allowed   almost like a sibling-like experience so Mom was  mad at me and yelled at me and I eventually kind   of snapped and told Mom that she needed to fix how  possessive Emma is and do better by me because I'm   her daughter I lost my dad and she threw me into  such a screwed up Dynamic and never cared about   what it did to me I told her at the very least  she needs to keep Emma away from me mom was mad   and said I protrayed Emma like some sort of bad  person she's still mad am I the jerk I don't   think Opie's a jerk here Opie explained it the  best when they said that they got tossed into a   very tumultuous situation that really any kid at  that age going through those circumstances would   find it probably very hard to adjust I'm just  left feeling bad for op and our final story of   the day is from zore witz am I the jerk for being  angry at my wife for not making a dinner we have   a 10-month-old daughter wife's on Parental leave  so usually she's taking care of the baby while I   work then we switch then in the evening she puts  the baby to bed and I spend the night with her   daughter as in I feed her change her calm her  down when she wakes up Etc now on Saturday wife   got diagnosed with shingles so she's quarantined  from the baby as in they don't have any contact   at all she feels 100% fine other than the spots  on her back so Saturday Sunday and Monday we had   a public holiday so no work I spend 100% with the  baby while wife did various housework we managed   to find a nanny for my work hours for the rest  of the weekdays on a Wednesday wife comes into   my office and room remote work and tells me  to finish up the dinner as she's going to get   her nails done so I spent an hour in the kitchen  making dinner for us and the baby Nanny stayed a   bit longer while I made dinner then spend the  rest of the day taking care of the baby now I   was pretty angry when she said she didn't have  the time to finish the dinner I mean I work 8   hours then spend the rest of the time taking care  of the baby and she didn't have the time to make   dinner for the baby really now she's angry at me  for getting angry at her and I wonder whether I   was not fair I think op's being the jerk in the  situation could they have gotten the dinner done   yeah probably so but considering the circumstances  considering how tired they have to be considering   the shingles and the constant being a mom if you  got to make a dinner one day it might suck but you   don't need to blow up over it am I the jerk for  telling my girlfriend she isn't allowed to have   kids over at our house so so basically just as it  sounds I'm 28-year-old male my girlfriend Kelly   26-year-old female has three siblings all of them  have kids and she's close with all of them she has   major love for her nieces and nephews I love that  for her but me myself am not a huge fan of kids   right now eventually yes I wouldn't mind having  kids but right now no I don't want them around I   bought my house 2 years ago Kelly moved in about a  year ago here's how the financial situation plays   out out I pay for all the mortgage and insurance  Kelly contributes groceries Wi-Fi utilities and   does most of the cleaning she cleans because she's  a neat freak not because I ask her to she just   likes to do it I have it set up this way because I  want to be responsible for the mortgage and don't   want her paying on it in case we were to break up  so I don't mind contributing triple what she does   to the household my place is very much in my style  lots of electronics and sports memorabilia I have   a nice bar with alcohol and wine on it I also  have all my golf and sports equipment displayed   I have nice couches and my place is very modern  not a kid-friendly environment recently Kelly's   been bringing her nieces and nephews over I have  a real issue with this the kids range from 14 to   2 and I don't want them around my stuff they  could steal my alcohol break my stuff and kids   are just messy they're dirty too and I just  don't want them in my space so I told Kelly   it's simple spend as much time with your nieces  and nephews as you want just can't be inside my   house go watch them at your siblings she's saying  that's unfair because sometimes her sister asks   her to wash her kids when she needs to clean their  house up or needs them out of the house I said to   take them to the park or mall or something just  Anywhere But Here she's saying it's her house and   she can do what she wants I said it isn't her  house it's mine and if she doesn't like the no   kids rule she is free to leave but I'm not risking  my things for the sake of her nieces and nephews   I just know if the kids were to mess crap up she  wouldn't pay me back for it so she can just go to   her family's house to watch them I've been called  The Jerk for this am I the jerk I think it's safe   to say that op is the jerk here and would you guys  agree with me when I say it just feels like these   two aren't really that compatible clearly they  both feel very differently on this issue and I   think it's a bit weird for op to hold oh this  is my house over their head when they've been   living there for a year and whether or not OP says  that they do or don't contribute to the household   the fact that they've been living there for a  year take care of the place clean up utilities   Wi-Fi it's just as much their house too they might  not own it but I feel like they should have a say   in the living situation Opie's going to hold it  over them and say well if you don't like it get   out and maybe that's the right thing to do do you  guys agree let me know in the comments down below   our next story is from final cream 6177 am I the  jerk for kicking out my maid of honor out of my   wedding party because she was being a buzz kill my  27-year-old female best friend Kathy 26-year-old   female is a professional wedding planner and has  helped host hundreds of weddings we've basically   grown up together and having a professional also  helped me with a wedding free of cost was very   ideal I made sure to shower her with gifts to  repay her for the help she offered throughout   that Journey now the wedding's in a month and  in 2 weeks it's my bachelorette weekend Kathy   notified me and the other girls of all that she  had arranged and which Airbnb she booked but she   said she didn't want to participate which came as  a shock to me because how are you going to plan   everything but not participate the girls told me  she had a very valid reason but it wasn't their   story to tell so I should ask her directly  I asked her and she replied look you've made   some requests for your bachelorette party and I  respect everything you want to do but there's some   things that are off limits for me and some of the  stuff such as the strippers I've booked for you   and some other activities are crossing boundaries  regarding me and my own fiance's relationship so   I made sure to arrange everything perfectly just  how you and the girls wanted it to be but sadly   it's not something I want to be involved in I hope  you have the greatest fun I was truly heartbroken   and tried to suck it up but as the days went by  instead of feeling more at ease with that thought   I got more upset I tried to talk to her about it  to change her mind but she wasn't having it she   later also said that just to warn me that she  won't drink any alcohol at the wedding because   she doesn't want to get sick because she's very  lightheaded I got very disappointed and at that   moment I straight up told her I don't want her as  a maid of honor if all she's going to do is be a   buzz kill about everything regarding regarding my  wedding and how she can attend as a simple guest   she got very upset and thought it was unfair of  me excluding her for these reasons the rest of   my bridesmaids now also believe that I took it too  far and how her skipping the trip for personal or   not drinking alcohol is not something that would  ruin my wedding and I'm just overreacting am I   the jerk I think beyond a shadow of a doubt op  is the jerk here and it's all about respecting   boundaries the fact alone that this person is able  enough going to op and saying I fully support you   and your wedding and you enjoying everything the  way you want it to it's just a boundary of mine   that I don't want to cross I think you should  be thankful that they're even brave enough to   say that to you you're treating your wedding  like a college frat and you're kicking them   out cuz they don't want to do any cage stands or  something honestly I feel like maybe this friend's   too good for op this next story is from ta Mama of  three am I the jerk for paying first class airfare   for my nanny and not myself son me female and my  husband male had our first child met 18-year-old   male when we were just 17 years old we weren't  in a very good financial situation at first and   it only got better when Matt was nine currently  we both work well-paying jobs byy a spacious home   and have our luxuries we had two more children  8-year-old male and 5-year-old female as we can't   stay at home all the time we hired a nanny May  45-year-old female to take care of the little   ones Matt had a complicated personality change at  age 11 we put him in private school and maybe the   contact with other teenagers brought out a selfish  and elitist side of him we tried our best to try   to improve it but with the onset of adolescence  and stubbornness it just seemed to get worse it   got better when my husband and I decided that at  age 16 he would work part-time so he could start   taking financial responsibility and that seemed  to give him a reality check as we cut our support   on his perks this this year after the worst period  of the pandemic my husband and I decided to go on   an international trip and instead of giving May a  vacation at home we decided that we would take her   not going to work and pay for everything I don't  live in the US Matt on a random day overheard me   talking to my husband that I was planning to pay  for a first class seat for May and her son for her   to enjoy like we did he asked why we should do  this we were already paying for everything let   her go economy class if she can't afford first  class I was shocked I said that it was mean to   say this and that she was an important person  for our family who gives up having time for her   own child to take care of mine it's the least I  can do he still stood his ground so I said if he   sees it that way I said I'd buy him an economy  seat and he'd have to turn around and pay for   an upgrade for him to see how privileged he is to  have parents who can pay he nodded thinking it was   a joke even though I said it wasn't and as the  months went by and I warned him that his ticket   was economy he didn't believe it on the day of the  trip like a shocked Pikachu he was startled when   he realized I told the truth he threw a tantrum in  the middle of the airport saying that 10 hours of   travel would be very uncomfortable I just replied  you had 6 months to gather you've been warned the   flight was okay but Matt was outraged the entire  trip saying that it was almost torture and that   we'd gone too far my husband agrees with me but  my parents said I went too far doing this am I   the jerk I think Go's definitely not the jerk one  because they tried earnestly to legitimately warn   them two flying an economy yeah it definitely  sucks compared to first class but it doesn't   hurt you it's not like a torture device God  forbid you don't get the lobster dinner on   economy now you're going to really suffer it's  torture mother I think you've gone too far I had   to sit with the peasants this next story is from  restaurant dinner 49 am I the jerk for getting mad   at my sister for coming to a family dinner with  her baby I 32-year-old male am engaged to Jesse   30-year-old female we've been together for 7 years  and have been trying for a baby for the past two   originally I was planning to propose to her during  a family dinner at a Michelin star restaurant so I   paid for 12 people to be there including her  and my families I made the booking nearly 10   months ago however plans have changed and instead  I've proposed during one of our holidays as the   time felt more right 2 months before the dinner  we find out that Jesse is pregnant I was beyond   happy to hear that so we decided to use the dinner  to announce the pregnancy instead alongside with   talking about wedding preparations the place  is rather high-end so it has a strict dress   code and set of rules to follow dinner was  yesterday my sister Emily decided to bring   my nephew kit with her who is is still breastfed  and is currently teething he's 6 months old so   instead of celebrating Jesse's pregnancy a lot  of people were feeling uncomfortable due to my   nephew crying nearly constantly and the owner of  the restaurant at some point asked us to leave   since kids were not allowed and my nephew was  disturbing the other guests I had no choice but   to ask Emily to leave she was hesitant at first  however I reminded her of the rules of the place   and in no way or form did she contact me to ask  if it would be okay to bring kit with her she's   tried to defend herself saying he's young but  her boyfriend who's also the father could have   stayed with kit since he finishes work at 4: I've  also told Emily how disappointed I was with what   she did as she ruined the dinner by bringing kit  in the place not made for kids Emily didn't like   that and left the rest of the dinner went okayish  but I could feel the tension later that night my   mom and my aunt aunt wasn't present as she lives  quite far away and can't really travel both called   me to tell me that what I did was a jerk move and  Emily's now upset and I need to apologize Jesse's   upset too but because she felt like everyone paid  attention to kit and we trying to calm him down   instead of congratulating us or discussing the  wedding what the dinner was about so am I the   jerk I think op is not the jerk I think this is  a situation where as a parent with a newborn kid   you need to make sure that wherever it is you're  going is child-friendly because not every place   is going to be accommodating for a six-month-old  child especially not a Michelin star restaurant   our next story is from confident history 14 am  I the jerk for wanting to serve my ex papers for   full custody and child support for my daughter now  that he has a new baby I 31-year-old female have   a wonderful 7-year-old daughter I would go to the  moon and back for and have been supporting her as   a single parent my ex 31-year-old man male hasn't  really been in her life since we split when she   was 2 and A2 he hasn't paid child support for the  last 4 years and has sporadically visited her at   his parents' home when she visits he says he'll  visit her while hyping her up and then not show   up only to give BS excuses on why he never showed  up leaving her devastated and upset that he didn't   want to spend time with her he's blamed me for  everything under the sun which I can prove to not   be true for example he blames me for not calling  him so he in video chat with her on my days off   when he doesn't even attempt to try in the first  place on his days off he even stated he couldn't   pay child support because he was rebuilding  his car my ex has seen multiple girls in the   past four years but has been seeing his current  girlfriend for about a year at this point and   she has a three-year-old daughter he shunted our  daughter to be his girlfriend's daughter's father   doing father daughter activities like going to  the pumpkin patch holidays and spending time   with a three-year-old he forgot his own daughter's  birthday for 2 years in a row and possibly for a   third time this year his family and I heard a  rumor that the girlfriend was pregnant 3 or 4   months ago his parents wanted to be in the baby's  life and I was ecstatic that my daughter would   have a half sibling since I don't want more kids  he vly denied that she was pregnant and we left   the subject alone well about 10 minutes before  I started my shift I was told and shown that my   ex-girlfriend had their baby girl that morning I  was livid he had lied to all of us that the baby   was coming and severed whatever trust we had with  him left I started looking at family attorneys in   my city because I know this will get messy he  wants parental rights without having to lift a   finger or pay child support I want full custody  since our daughter lives with me fulltime before   people ask no he's not in our daughter's life  unless he wants to others to see he's being a   good dad the last time we visited her she didn't  recognize him at all yes I filed for child support   several times in the past only for them to die in  court because he didn't want to sign the paperwork   I'm at my wits end with him I vented to a close  couple of friends and close co-workers about   this and the majority are saying that I'm the jerk  because I should be excited for the new baby and   that with the new baby he won't have the funds  for child support am I the jerk if I go through   with getting a family attorney and serving him  papers while he's caring for a newborn I think   op is not the jerk because it's pretty clear that  this guy has just all but settled on abandoning   them I think it's actually pretty obvious that  this guy is slowly growing the distance between   them before hopefully he can just run off into the  sunset with the new baby and new life as hopeful   as op is I don't think there was ever going to  be a future where op's kid plays with their half   sibling because the dad won't engage in any of  it definitely get that child support our next   story is from I love waffle fries 1225 would  I be the jerk for wanting immodest bridesmaid   dresses for my wedding I 20-year-old female  am getting married next summer I grew up in a   very religious household but was able to flee  the toxicity as I like to say the rest of my   family are all still very active members in that  church I asked my two sisters 22 and 17 to be my   bridesmaides within said religion once you reach a  certain age you're eligible to make extra promises   and one of those promises is that you'll remain  chess no premarital sex wear modest clothing Etc   you're then given the magical underwear to wear  at all times they essentially resemble kneelength   shorts and a cap sleeve t-shirt but an underwear  type material earlier today we went shopping   for bridesmaid dresses the vision I have for my  wedding is simple but particular I would prefer   my bridesmaids to wear the same dress spaghetti  straps knee length flowy semi-exposed back and   chest my mom and older sister during the entirety  of this appointment sat there and told me that I   needed to be accommodating towards her religious  needs with finding a dress for her that completely   covers her underwear normally I wouldn't have a  problem with this but this is for my wedding I'll   wear what she wants for hers so I don't get why  it's such a big deal for mine my mom tried to say   that it was the same as a Muslim woman wanting  to accommodate for her he job please correct   me if I use the wrong terminology or a member  of Jewish faith wearing a yamaka again please   correct me if needed I don't know if maybe it's  because I'm looking at it all with poop colored   glasses but I don't think it's the same thing  they're just underwear to me and people have to   wear underwear to accommodate different clothing  all the time so why is this any different anyways   part of me just wants to resend my invitation  for her to be in the bridal party since it's   already caused so much drama but I know that it'll  only cause more if I do I'd be risking my younger   sister pulling out as a bridesmaid and I would be  risking losing the financial help my parents have   offered that I'm incredibly grateful for I don't  want her to be uncomfortable but I also want my   wedding to look and be a certain way so am I the  jerk for not choosing a dress that accommodates   her I think Gopi is the jerk and I think the  distinction that they're failing to understand   here is that although they I guess they would  say escaped this religion their sisters still   practice it and while it might just be underwear  to you to them it actually really mean something   and frankly to look at them in the face and try to  argue that you don't have to accommodate for them   at all is actually pretty insulting so I wouldn't  blame any of them for being kind of outraged over   this it might not be your choice to follow that  religion or even think it's practical but they   do and I think the least you can do is show them  respect towards that especially if it's a modesty   thing our next story is from Frosty Foundation  130 am I the jerk for leaving my friend group   chat after being left out at a wedding I 23  3-year-old female and being called Petty and   immature for trying to leave my friends group chat  after my feelings were hurt I have a very large   friend group that hangs out all together a couple  of times a year we have a large group chat which   we use regularly to share memories and photos as I  mentioned it's a very large group about 18 people   as such obviously we aren't all equally close  some of the connections between people in the   group is mainly mutual friends however we do all  generally go to the same parties well one of the   people in this group was getting married and  although we've known each other for a couple   of years now I'm not close friends with her  I suspected I wouldn't get an invite to her   wedding because she said it was more of a low-key  event and I knew she didn't have a lot to spend on   it when it came time to send out our invitations  I received a call from one of our mutual friends   whom we're both close with my friend wanted to  tell me that the bride felt really awful about   it but that she couldn't invite me to the wedding  because of limited space I immediately reached out   to her and let her know that there were no hard  feelings and that weddings were stressful enough   I did feel a little bad about not being invited  but I also assumed that there were other people   in our friend group receiving similar calls  well as it turned out I was completely wrong   this weekend my group chat blew up with pictures  from the wedding and while I was looking through   them I realized that I had been the only one who  didn't receive an invite what was worse is that   everyone who had a significant other had gotten a  plus one even my friend who had started dating his   girlfriend after I was told they couldn't invite  me I was so embarrassed I've been very insecure   about friendships the majority of my life because  I've had multiple people upgrade to someone more   popular than me so I suppose because of this I  got upset and decided I didn't want to be a part   of the entire group anymore and I left the group  chat that's when my friend started reaching out   to me asking why I had left left some of them were  understanding but my best friend told me that it   looks really bratty and Petty now I'm feeling bad  because I really didn't want to put a damper on   their wedding Joy but being excluded really hurts  my feelings so now I'm worrying am I in the wrong   I don't think Opie is in the wrong here because I  don't understand how they can have all these plus   one invitations and then somehow not be able  to invite op to the party I just don't get it   obviously how is that going to make anybody feel  in this friend group everybody else gets invited   and their significant others and you're the one  odd man out I mean that kind of puts the writing   on the wall right they clearly don't value you  like they do everybody else in that group not   only that 16 out of 17 people were invited and  not any of the other 15 stood up for you or said   that you should be invited too if that isn't even  more writing on the wall I don't know what is this   next story is from dbig 2584 am I the jerk for  not going on what was meant to be my birthday   birthday trip since my sister went I'm 16-year-old  female and was meant to be doing this for my 17th   birthday just a little early since my birthday  is November and we were meant to go for 10 days   my parents had said that it would be just me and  them and it was meant to be the first vacation I   could enjoy since my sister's always been a  problem she's 14 and she's had mental health   problems since she was very young and it comes  out in really disruptive ways she acts out she   gets into a lot of trouble she doesn't like being  around people she'll curse and scream and cause a   scene everywhere any vacation we've done has been  spoiled by this and I know it's not entirely her   fault but I never enjoy them I always hate going  so when my parents said they wanted to give me   an experience instead of a physical gift for my  birthday I told them I didn't want her there she   was meant to stay with our Aunt who has training  as a psych nurse and is the only person outside   my parents who can handle her but then my sister  found out about it and told our parents and she   felt bad so a week before we were meant to go they  told me she was also coming and that is when I   said I would not be going that they didn't get to  ruin what was meant to be my birthday present by   having her there my parents asked me what they  were supposed to do and I told them they were   meant to give me one thing that she can't spoil or  ruin my sister was really bad leading up to it too   and I ended up staying with my grandparents while  she went and they were miserable coming back which   made me even more glad I didn't go my sister told  me it was meant to be for me and I had to walk   away because otherwise I would have told her to  her face that I didn't want her ruining it for me   my parents told me I should have still gone that I  made them feel crappy made them feel guilty I said   good they told me I should be more understanding  I said I was but that if I can't enjoy my own   birthday treat without it being ruined and it's  not worth it for me I told them I'm perfectly   aware that she's not totally in control and that  she's got many issues all diagnosed but that I   can't Overlook how things get ruined when she's  there or how my birthday trip became all about her   darn feelings when mine have been hurt countless  times my parents and I have tension there since my   sister also heard everything we said and she ended  up being taken to the hospital by the police as a   result am I the jerk this is a painful one but  I think op is not the jerk here because I think   it's valid that disability ities or issues or  whatever aside op deserves to have things that   are meant for them solely for them that they can  enjoy especially in a situation like this where   they set up everything for op to enjoy finally  we're going to have that thing and then drop the   bombshell back on them a week before it happens  that's not fair to anybody and I think it's   justifiable how op feels this next story is from  glittering ball 2429 am I the jerk for calling   the cops because no one picked up the kid I was  babysitting my boyfriend and I took his ex's kid   for a last minute overnight stay since the father  of the kid canceled on her she had plans with her   friends for the night and we weren't busy so we  took him overnight when the baby daddy bailed on   her we told her we had brunch reservations the  next morning at 11:00 and while we were happy to   help she needed to pick him up by 9:00 a.m. she  knew this and agreed when she dropped him off   well the next morning it's 9:00 a.m. and she isn't  here yet we text and call her with no answer 10:00   a.m. rolls around and we try calling her again  she picks up in a very groggy voice and tells   us she's got the worst hangover and she won't  be picking him up till 2:00 p.m. we remind her   of our brunch reservations and she tells us to  take him with us the kid is 2 years old it's not   enjoyable to take a child this age out to eat my  boyfriend cancels our reservations and gets ready   to have this kid until she decides to pick him  up I am furious at this point this isn't my child   nor my boyfriend's child I call her and tell her  that if she's not here by noon I would be calling   the police to collect her child she only lives 15  minutes away she calls me a witch I then told her   she had 30 minutes to come get him I waited an  hour and there was Zero sign of her we couldn't   drop the child off to her since she lives in an  apartment complex that you need to have access to   to get in so I called the cops and told them I was  babysitting and I don't know where his parents are   they were supposed to be here 2 hours ago they  basically treated it as they would a Lost Child   they took him down to the station Little Miss  finally rolls up at 300 p.m. and gets belligerent   when she discovers I had actually called the  cops and gave her child to them she calls me all   sorts of wonderful names and storms down to the  police station not the jerk op and their partner   were trying to do something nice for these people  and they took way too much Advantage they agreed   didn't understood that they wanted them picked  up at 9:00 a.m. they blew right through that   didn't care called you a witch they deserved every  little bit of it I feel bad for the kid the kid   needs better parents honestly I hope the police  keep a record of that this next story is from   screen nice 4263 but i' be the jerk if I asked  my cousin to use my breast milk when her baby's   born so I've been debating on this question for  the last week and saw another post on here to do   with breast milk and it made me decide that this  might be a good place to get feedback on if this   would make me a jerk to ask this even though it's  wildly different situations I recently lost my 9we   old daughter to SIDS sudden infant death syndrome  and it's been a traumatic time for me I won't lie   my cousins due any day now with their own baby a  girl too my cousin had a double myectomy to combat   cancer four years ago and this girl is conceived  from an embryo she and her husband had Frozen   before she began treatment this does however mean  she won't be able to nurse and there is a formula   shortage right now I'm still producing milk and  it seems a waste to dispose of it my cousin and   I grew up like sisters and had plans for our  children to grow up similarly she even planned   the implantation of the embryo around when I was  trying to fall pregnant to ensure their ages were   close I want to offer my milk to my cousin for her  baby as someone should get use of it and I love my   cousin and her future baby to be clear as I know  some people will misunderstand I don't want to   nurse her baby at my breast I would pump the milk  as I'm doing right now anyway and drop it around   at her house I have no health issues or anything  that would make this milk problematic for her   baby my issue is I wonder if asking this would be  insensitive and a reminder of my loss and also her   inability to nurse her child I've not been in the  best of places because of my grief and I'm aware   enough to know that perhaps this is making me  unable to judge if this would be a step too far or   inappropriate would this be out of line to offer  I'd not push if she said no of course I actually   think this is a very reasonable thing to offer  there's no hiding the fact that the best thing for   a newborn baby is actual breast milk and you have  Supply they have demand and op said they're really   close so I don't see why it would be an issue  frankly I think if the cousin was ever offended   by this it would be a really personal thing that  is kind of them lashing out unnecessarily and   not because that would be an appropriate reaction  honestly I think it's amazing that op would offer   and our final story of the days from Theory Number  96 am I the jerk for refusing to change bikinis   I'll start by saying that where I live not the  US it's rather hot at the moment and it's pool   party season my grandparents own a house with  a big pool and so weekly or bi-weekly my family   gather just to have fun and swim my grandparents  don't mind since they don't really do anything   besides offer the house we all cook buy snacks  get the place ready and then clean two years ago   my sister married their now husband who happens  to be one of my exes at first I was horrified   because they began to date pretty quickly but now  I don't mind we don't interact much never have so   at previous Gatherings we would just be in on our  business not really caring about the other she's   usually with our cousins and our parents while I'm  with our grandparents and some aunts and uncles   her husband whom I'll call Mike is always there  of course but we don't don't talk to each other   and she's pregnant 26 weeks last Sunday we were  getting the garden ready when she came to see me   and asked me to change I was already wearing my  bikini with a see-through dress over it it was a   normal one but I have a bigger chest than her and  she was fuming I asked if I had something or what   and she said no but I'm pregnant and I don't feel  my best I don't want Mike looking at you I was   confused and looked at Mike who was playing with  one of my cousins not really paying attention I   I said she didn't really have to worry about Mike  but this made her angrier and told me not to act   like we were buddies and go change I said sorry  no I won't change she said I was trying to get her   husband's attention and I actually laughed because  what the freak I said if that bothered her so much   she should have thought of that before getting  with my ex my grandpa got in the middle and told   us to stop he told my sister I wasn't changing and  he asked me to say sorry for my last comment I did   and she wasn't happy later on my mom came to me  with another bikini and told me to go change but I   decided to just go home and it caused my grandpa  to scold both my sister and Mom for making his   house a hostile environment and now they're both  mad at me because I should have just changed am   I the jerk I think op is not the jerk here this  is a family get together it's a pool party people   are going to be wearing bikinis bottom line though  it is never the fault of the person who gets ouled   for for causing the person who is UGL to do so  if you're that worried about your husband ooing   and awing well then I guess you're just going to  have to sit there the whole time watching them   maybe hand them a blindfold am I the jerk for  being honest with my son that I'm not proud of   him my wife Nina and I became pregnant with our  son Jason when we were both 20 we'll admit it was   an unplanned pregnancy but we loved our son and  kept him we did our best to raise Jason to be kind   respectful and treat others well and we thought  we succeeded Jason worked hard to attend an elite   University Jason and his first wife Sarah had a  daughter Simone unfortunately Sarah passed in a   car accident before Simone's thirdd birthday Jason  raised Simone until Simone was four at that time   he met his second wife and moved two hours away  Simone lives with us Jason visits once every two   months at best he and his wife would stay for the  day by Simona present then Jason would say it's   time to leave nah and I suspect he only visits in  by Simone the present because his wife makes him   his wife iris is a lovely lady she insists that  Simone should move in with them or they should   move closer to us because she wants to be Simone's  stepmom and spend time with her but Jason shoots   the idea down because he says Simone moving in or  them moving would hurt his career and it's best   Simone stay with nah and me Simone is 11 now and  she Ador Jason she makes drawings and cards for   him constantly makes treats to send to him it's  devastating for her because her daddy is her hero   and he doesn't want to spend time with her her  birthday was in July and she cried when Jason   didn't call her to wish her a happy birthday Irish  tried lying to Simone to make her feel better that   the phone lines went down and Jason didn't forget  but Simone didn't believe her Simone's at summer   camp all this week and Jason invited us to a  party to celebrate receiving a promotion during   the party Jason told me about how much more money  he makes with this promotion and his job title and   he asked you should be proud old man job title and  an elite University alumni I sighed and told Jason   that I honestly have not been proud of him as of  late he may have a well-paying job but he treats   his own beautiful daughter as if she doesn't  matter Simone is his own little girl she loves   him so much and he doesn't even seem to care Nina  came back with drinks and Jason told her what I   said nah told him that she agreed with me and he  doesn't treat Simone right most of the family says   that I and nah were in the wrong to tell Jason I  wasn't proud of him they said I should know how   much that statement hurts at any age because  I was never good enough in my own father's   eyes they said that Jason is probably focusing on  stabilizing his career and Simone can move in with   him after they also said Jason's own promotional  party was not the time or place to call him out   and I could have just congratulated Jason on  working hard and saved the drama for for another   day I feel what I said needed to be said but most  of the family is disagreeing with nah and me am   I the jerk the truth hurts sometimes and I think  gop's not the jerk here would you guys agree when   I say as much as Jason wants to deflect things  here or maybe disagree with their own parents the   fact is Jason isn't even doing the bare minimum  of maintaining a relationship with Simone that   forgetting to call on your own child's birthday  is enough to be not proud of somebody let me know   what you guys think in the comments down below  our next story is from OK Antelope 4554 am I the   jerk for having my kids wear tiedye when they're  with their dad I 30-year-old female my ex-husband   31-year-old male got divorced 5 years ago during  our divorce we owned an old single wide mobile   home 1973 on a large piece of land that zoned  for a trailer park he wanted the new truck in   our savings I wanted the old trailer in the land  my ex and I have two girls 8 and seven since my   divorce I slowly started buying old single wides  and restoring them turning it into a business I   love it my girls go to their dad's an AP apartment  every other weekend I started noticing their   clothes electronics toys were not coming home at  first I thought their dad was just keeping a few   outfits there for them however my 8-year-old got  upset when she was packing I asked her what was   wrong she told me her dad takes her clothes and  sells them online that she doesn't want to take   her favorite shirt over there I immediately called  my ex I asked her to return our daughter's clothes   not wanting to throw my daughter under the bus  I blamed it on them not having enough for school   he played dumb he said he got rid of the clothes  that were too small I pointed out that the jeans   our 7-year-old had were brand new he then said  it was only fair that he got some cash cuz he   owned the trailer and land if it wasn't for him  I wouldn't be doing this good I was pissed I   took my daughter's down to the dollar store and  bought cheap shirts to a thrift store and bought   cheap shorts we had a girls tie-dye night hot pink  everything each made five shirts and five bottoms   I let our girls design and decorate them my girls  loved it the following week X sends the girls home   I can tell he's mad but he didn't say anything  the clothes were not returned no fear I knew this   would be an issue we made extras when the girls  went back they were wearing tie-dye they were   there with their dad for an hour before he called  and demanded different clothes I kindly told him   that our daughters love those clothes they really  really love tie-dye ex got even angrier and said   his parents have a major family party and the  girls can't wear pink tiedye I told him that he   should go buy other clothes if he didn't want them  to wear it he called me a jerk for being petty am   I the jerk absolutely not the jerk this dude is  ridiculous for trying to sell their kids stuff and   then expecting you to continue to supply them with  clothing on their kids and in their kids suitcases   for them to turn around and sell what did this  guy even expect to happen here of course you're   going to send your kids over wearing the cheapest  simplest clothes and let's simplify this to what   it really is the ex-husband might say oh well I'm  just taking back some of the money I gave you but   they're really stealing from the kids because the  kids like those clothes and the the clothes were   always theirs and meant for them so everything  you take away isn't from your ex it's from your   own children our next story is from Princess aula  am I the jerk for still having my daughter's first   birthday party okay here's the background my  24-year-old female friend 24-year-old female   and I gave birth on the same day her due date  was supposed to be 2 months later but her baby   came early we were both so excited unfortunately  6 months ago her baby passed on on I can't begin   to imagine her pain I've tried to be there for  her as best as I could she just wants to be left   alone most of the time which I understand now onto  the issue my daughter's birthday is coming up in   September and we plan to invite close friends  and family to her birthday party I texted her   before invites were sent out saying I wanted to  let you know my daughter's birthday's on said   date and I just wanted to let you know you're  invited no pressure on you to come at all she   texted me back saying oh no thanks I'll be at my  daughter's grave that day you know the one that   will never have a first birthday freak off she  told our other friends how pissed she is at me   for even inviting her and that it's awful that I'm  still celebrating this day and they kind of see   her side saying I could have been more sensitive  my husband doesn't think I did anything wrong and   it's just grief talking am I the jerk for inviting  her I think Opie is not the jerk here and I think   all of those friends that say oh well we kind of  see her side are saying that solely out of pity   points it might be rude of me to say but like I  feel like they're just saying it just to be nice   they see their side because they don't want to  upset them and then they say well you could have   been more sensitive op because they don't want to  upset them it's awful it sucks and it's horrible   that they have to grieve but that doesn't place an  obligation on you to stop you or your baby's lives   and what was the alternative to don't invite them  how does that look ar stories from throwaway 10876   543 am I the jerk for telling my ex-wife's new  partner that she's not the parent of her unborn   child and has no saying what his name will be my  ex-wife female 28 and I male 28 split up a few   months ago due to her coming out as a lesbian the  split was quite amicable and we've remained quite   good friends while she did cheat on me during  the relationship I understand that it was due   to her sexuality she came from a very Conservative  Christian household who have cut her off now that   she's come out marrying me was a way of plating  her family I suppose the issue now arising is the   fact that she's pregnant with her child during  our marriage we agreed that if we had a son we   would name him after both of our grandfathers  as they were both very important people in our   lives Samuel Jacob last name an issue has been  raised by her new partner female 27 over the name   now I will fully admit that her new partner and I  have never really got along she was a friend of a   friend before she got together with my ex and  we just never saw eye to eye but we both have   tried to be cordial for the sake of my ex while  we recently were discussing the name of our child   the partner outright refused to accept that we  were going to name the child Samuel she had an   ex named Samantha who was now abusive towards  her and said that she could not stand to have   her child share the name with her ex now I fully  understand that this woman will inevitably be a   part of my son's life but I explained to her the  meaning behind why we were naming him Samuel and   how important it was to me my ex also backed me  up saying how this was decided long before she was   in the picture and while she was sorry that the  name offended her she would leave the decision to   me her partner proceeded to get very angry again  insisting that her child would not have that name   this sent me over the edge I asked asked her if I  got her pregnant she of course said no I asked if   she somehow magically got my ex pregnant again  she said no I then told her that since she was   not the parent of this child that my ex and I will  give our child the name we want regardless of her   opinion the partner proceeded to go ballistic  at me calling me homophobic for not giving her   any input and forcing her into the situation and  stormed out of the room my ex was also not happy   with me but still agreed that I will have the  final say and the naming of our child this was   a few days ago and I haven't spoken to either of  them since I've asked around a few of my friends   and have gotten a mixed response when I asked if  I was wrong personally I'm of the opinion that op   is not the jerk and also I failed to see how this  would be some kind of homophobic issue this is op   and their Ex-Wives kid that they're having and  they agreed that this name was already settled   on well in advance before this person was in  the picture and it's not even their own legal   kid they're not even going to be able to adopt  this kid like I'm sorry but despite being in   their lives probably they don't have any claim  to choose what name they have honestly people   resorting to the oh you're homophobic as a way of  trying to become a victim in a lot of different   situations that aren't even related to sexuality  people like that only stand to hurt the continued   progress that LGBT people are having our next  story is from throw away hhhj would I be the   jerk if I sell my niece's Electronics my niece 16  lives with me since her parents passed away about   a year ago she knows how to drive but her driving  isn't very good she's only allowed to drive my car   when I'm with her to help her learn more the past  few nights she's been asking me to let her drive   but I was too busy last night she went out of my  home with my car and slightly hit the wall I was   and still am very angry because my car is new and  very expensive I grabbed all of her electronics   and told her I'm going to sell them and use the  money to fix my car she cried and begged me not to   because her dad bought them for her she promised  to pay for it all if I don't sell them but I don't   see that happening because she doesn't have a job  I might be the jerk because I don't need the money   and can pay for it myself but I want to do this  to teach her a lesson my wife says I'm a jerk   though so I don't know I think op needs to be  be very careful here because they could do some   serious damage there's no denying the fact that  their parents passed away only about a year ago   and those parents definitely bother those things  I would say maybe they're not the jerk if there   was no sentimental issue at hand but if you take  away things that have sentimental value even if   it's just because the parents recently is bought  it for them then yeah I think you're a jerk Big   Time kids do make mistakes it was a costly one  but if anything try to just make this a Learning   lesson and maybe try to get your money out of them  in a more Hands-On way with like chores grounding   just basically something that's not going to  possibly damage their psyche our next story is   from it's a throwaway am I the jerk for telling  my wife our daughter is more important than she   is our daughter is turning 18 in October she's  a great kid always pulled Straight A's never in   any type of trouble and she's very respectful my  wife recently decided to have have a talk with her   about adult responsibilities I had no knowledge  of this conversation until my daughter came to me   crying because she was scared about living on her  own I was confused at first then she told me her   mother said that she needs to start looking for  a job because she'll be expected to get her own   place after her birthday I was appalled because  we never discussed throwing her out at 18 when I   confronted my wife she said her daughter wasn't  a child anymore and needed our push to become   an adult I told her I was really baffled that she  would exclude me from such a serious decision and   conversation I asked my wife how she expects  our kid to make it on minimum wage especially   considering the rent is out of control in our area  she then informs me that she had planned for us   to pay half her rent until she was 20 I asked her  why she wanted our kid gone so bad as our argument   intensified I believe she slipped by saying she  needed the space her bedroom room for her Art   Studio I couldn't believe it I told my wife if  her hobby was more important than our daughter   she should be the one looking to rent however she  took that as me saying move out but that's not how   I meant it I was implying for her to rent more  space for her studio and to leave our daughter   alone she didn't believe that's what I actually  meant she then gave me the silent treatment for   3 Days our daughter however was still upset as she  processed her mother wanting her out she realized   moving into a rental meant that she had to leave  her two cats behind she's had these cats since   she was a young child that alone devastated her  she told me I don't want to turn 18 I don't want   to celebrate my birthday I picked the argument  back up with my wife at that point I said our   daughter isn't moving out until she decides on her  own terms because she is more important than you   or your hobby she looks stunned and maybe In the  Heat of the Moment I didn't choose my words wisely   I couldn't bear to see our daughter so upset any  longer I don't want her struggling to make ends   meet and not being able to follow her dreams the  last thing I want is for her to feel rushed as   far as my wife goes she's not talking to me at  all and she's been cold towards our daughter I   think Gopi is not the jerk and I think Gopi has a  modern and reasonable mindset I think it's great   if you have hobbies but not if you got to kick  your own kid out of the house right away when   they turn 18 to do so if you had kids or if you  do currently have kids would there ever be an age   where you would actually kick them out straight up  or as long as they have their head on straight and   they're not doing anything inappropriate would you  be okay with having them around until they figure   something out even if that means into their late  20s or even maybe later I'd like to know what you   guys think our next story is from ctis killes am I  the jerk for scaring my boyfriend and his brother   by going missing when they repeatedly left left  my friend and I behind on a hike I had plans with   my boyfriend Jack his brother Tyler and my friend  Paula to go hiking last weekend I had suggested   an easier flatter Trail for us to hike since Paula  isn't as experienced of a hiker as the rest of us   I thought the plan was to just hike together and  hang out and talk but the day of we started at a   normal pace and the guys just kept going faster  Paula was lagging behind kind of out of breath   and I stuck with her I was irritated because a  huge rule of wilderness safety is to stay with   your group because crap can go sideways fast in  the back country they were stopping to wait every   mile or so we never knew where they were because  they didn't say and nobody had sell service but   as soon as we caught up they would start going at  top speed again leaving us playing catchup nonstop   I told Jack that I'd like them to stick with  us and he complained that we were too slow the   trail was too easy they need Eed their workout  after the third time they ran off Paula and I   got to this Viewpoint before the main Peak so we  sat down to take our first breather in hours and   vent she joked that we should stop chasing and  let them wonder I suggested we just hang out at   the Viewpoint until the guys noticed or found us  on the way back down she pulled out a joint that   she'd been planning on sharing at the top of the  mountain and we hung out and smoked and ate our   lunch it was an hour and a half before the guys  came back back we heard them before we saw them   they were sprinting down the trail yelling our  names I called out over here except I was coughing   from smoking so it sounded more like over oh here  the guys came running to the Viewpoint and Paula   was giggling her butt off in my attempt to yell  I got the giggles from her and the joint we just   finished two the guys confused our giggling for  crying since we were both just kind of wheezing   with laughter and we're asking what happened  I was like we're okay we're just High Tyler   got really mad at us saying they'd stopped off a  half a mile from the summit to wait for us before   making the final push and after we didn't show up  for an hour they decided to turn back to look for   us instead of summiting and he was Furious that  we just stopped to get high without telling them   I was like I thought we split up like y'all were  off doing your own thing all day and my boyfriend   raised his voice at me telling me that you don't  split up a group without communication at that   Paula and I just got the giggles again like no  crap it was just funny how he was saying the   same thing I'd been saying all day for the rest  of the hike the guys were angry with us because   we ruin their Summit making them turn back just  because we didn't even try to keep up am I the   jerk for going missing on a hike absolutely not  and honestly I'm glad a situation like this turned   out to be a good memory who invites somebody out  on a hike or takes somebody out on a hike that   clearly isn't as experienced a hiker and doesn't  compensate at all for them just expects them to   slowly follow you from I don't know a mile behind  this next story is from sexy cupcake 0218 am I the   jerk for being annoyed at boyfriend is home on  my day off title's a bit weird let me explain   so my boyfriend and I both work the day shift so  we're both home after 6:00 p.m. we have our days   off setup so that he's off Saturday and Sundays  and I'm off Sundays and Mondays we each get one   day off to ourselves to just be alone and do  our own thing and then one day off together   to do whatever we want as well my boyfriend and I  have fairly different Hobbies we split doing his   and me things together throughout the week he's  really into fitness and working out and always   being active I'm a pretty strong gamer and enjoy  sfx and more indoor and less sweaty things so   we stayed up stupid late last night and called  into to work this morning N9 out of 10 times I   wouldn't care but it's Monday it's my only day to  myself and he's constantly bugging me to go work   out with him or go on a hike or just generally to  be active because he's bored again nine out of 10   times it wouldn't matter and I would spend a few  hours doing whatever he wanted I need this day   to just be quiet and dark and me time I'm 100% on  the opposite end of a social person I just want my   one day to be alone to recuperate for the week I  look forward to this one day the entire week I'm   definitely annoyed and definitely showing it even  though I'm trying not to I've tried explaining   this I've tried being nice and just telling him I  need some more me time and he's just not listening   I pretty much snapped and told him to just leave  me the freak alone for a bit and now he's sulking   in the living room am I the jerk I think op is  not the jerk because I think it's important to   recognize that not everybody is as socially  outgoing personally I think I'm right in line   with OP here as far as I really do value my time  off I'm not a very social person at all and me   being alone often is how I just recuperate I don't  blame op because I imagine it can feel suffocating   to not just have that time off our next story is  from Life thermometer am I The Jerk for refusing   to give a kid a cupcake with a candle and seeing  happy birthday to him I know it sounds bad but   please hear me out background I have two boys that  are 2 years apart four and six the six-year-old's   birthday party was last weekend the four-year-old  well he's turning four will have his birthday   party in a couple of weeks I've always had a  shared party since the birthdays are so close   but the older brother wanted a party just for him  okay the story We invited a few family members and   some friends nothing too big there was a total  of 12 kids ranging from a baby to an 8-year-old   we all had a good time and everyone was happy  10 seconds after we sang Happy Birthday and my   son blew his candles a friend she's my husband's  friend's wife asked for a cupcake and a candle   and proceeded to say that now we're singing for  her almost 3-year-old I honestly thought it was   a joke it wasn't his birthday and even if it was  that's weird we she said they started a tradition   that every time they go to a party he gets to  blow the candles too and gets a happy birthday   song sing to him too I was so taken aback that  I said we're only celebrating my son's special   day so we're not singing happy birthday to her kid  her kid cried threw a tantrum and they left after   that some family told me I was rude on refusing  was I I now feel bad but this is the reason my   kid wanted us solo party was I wrong I don't think  op was the jerk here because to me it sounds like   those other parents were really catering to their  kid feeling the need to be special really feeding   the child's me me me type behavior and I'm worried  how that kid's going to grow up our next story is   from ait1 123 throw am I the jerk for calling my  brother an inconsiderate insecure pompous jerk my   brother and I are not very close I can tolerate  him if need be but I think he struggles in many   social situations he can't seem to read basic  social cues and makes many inappropriate comments   and jokes he has strong opinions about everything  jumps to unreasonable conclusions and never lets   things go my wife and his wife have been friends  for years my wife doesn't like my brother much   but she's very polite and courteous towards him  for the sake of my sister-in-law my wife and I   lost our three-year-old son about a year ago his  death was sudden and and there's not a day that   goes by where I don't grieve them there will never  come a day hour minute or second I'll stop loving   or thinking about my son in my family talking  about a dead child makes people uncomfortable   and is almost treated as taboo I'm not too fond of  this culture and I've been candid about going to   therapy counseling sessions support groups Etc my  wife and I started going to marriage therapy after   the loss of our son my family believes that we're  going to coupl counseling because our marriage is   failing or my wife isn't satisfying me enough  this could not be further from the truth and   I think it's a bit disgusting and ridiculous  my sister-in-law invited my wife and I for a   nice dinner at their place to celebrate my wife's  birthday most of my family would be there and she   promised us no drama Andor unnecessary comments  we got there and it was nice at first everyone   was being respectful and I I was having fun near  the end a few people gave my wife small gifts   we were planning to open them at home and react  privately but my brother was very adamant about   seeing my wife's reaction to his gift he was so  sure that he had the best gift and wanted my wife   to open his gift in front of everyone nothing  could have prepared me for his present he gave   her a baby's Romper meant for a newborn boy and  an expensive set of lingerie I was was so shocked   when she looked at him he laughed and said that  it was to motivate her to bring a spark back into   the marriage everyone was speechless until my wife  politely thanked everyone for coming and then left   leaving my brother's gift I told my brother that  the gift was wrong and Incredibly inappropriate he   started to get defensive and very aggressive so  in anger I called him an inconsiderate insecure   pompous jerk my sister-in-law as well as a few  other family members told me that even if the   gift was in bad taste I shouldn't have called them  such names and provoked him I may be the jerk for   the unnecessary name calling I think op is not  the jerk and considering everything that went on   I think op was very well said would you guys agree  with me when I say that op kept better composure   than I think most people would I think that was a  very reasonable and honestly more subdued reaction   than some people would have and our final story  of the days from Bob 01 am I the jerk for refusing   to invite a childhood friend to my birthday my  birthdays in a few weeks my mom and I went out   for Bloody Marys yesterday and ran into someone  she used to be friends with I'll call her Wendy   Wendy has a daughter Linny and when I was a kid  I was forced to be friends with Lenny apparently   we're the same age but she always acted babyish  which kind of annoyed me when I was like 12ish I   stopped going when my mom would do stuff with them  well she stopped dragging me along Wendy started   going on and on about how she can't believe how  her daughter and I are both grown now my mom said   yeah Opie's birthday's coming up and I just can't  believe how old she is Wendy asked if I was doing   anything for my birthday I assumed she was just  making conversation so I said meeting with some   friends and going to different bars then she said  well Lenny just moved back to town and is looking   to meet people maybe she can meet up with you on  your birthday I just said eh I'm not sure where   we'll be and when so she said then give me your  number and I'll give it to Lenny so she can call   or text you to see where you are I said uh nah  that's okay maybe some other time really hoping   that she would take a hint she said no no this  is perfect meet up with an old friend and meet   new people just give me your number I sort as s  and said look I don't really want to to go when   we were kids I was forced to hang out with her I  don't consider her a childhood friend Wendy looked   at my mom and my mom said you weren't really  forced just encouraged Wendy said sorry I was just   trying to help you guys reconnect Lenny doesn't  have many people to hang out with since all their   old friends moved on have a good birthday then  walked away my mom said I was unnecessarily rude   and should have just given her my number and not  answered her call or text if I didn't want Lenny   there I feel like I was trying to be nice about  it and she didn't get it so I had to be blunt am   I the jerk I think op's not the jerk here but  if I was in OP shoes I'd also still just kind   of feel bad about it I would be left with both a  I'm kind of glad she's not coming but also B oh   I kind of feel bad for disappointing them but no  means no that said that's all the time we have for   today now if you want to hear another am I the  jerk here story that was way crazier than any   of the stories you heard in this video click on  that left video or if you missed my latest video   check out the one on the right that said I'll  see you all next time with some more stories

Channel: Storytime

Views: 87,835

Keywords: storytime, story time, life stories, r/maliciouscompliance, r/idontworkherelady, r/entitledparents, r/entitled parents, entitled parents, maliciouscompliance, malicious compliance, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, r/pro revenge, reddit stories, funny reddit stories

Id: 2aUQpEB6h8U

Length: 239min 50sec (14390 seconds)

Published: Thu Nov 16 2023