Best of Pimento | Brooklyn Nine-Nine | Comedy Bites

hey Jake can I show you something over here sure thing web trying to send Genevieve his sexy pic just move my bubble but pop nope I'm out excuse me pal squad meet detective Adrian pimento he's been deep undercover for the last 12 years but he's just resurfaced and he's rejoining the nine-nine that yes some of you just met detective pimento and of course some of you knew him before he went undercover Hitchcock and Scully you guys still work here the only way they're getting rid of us is in a body bag it actually happened once but it was a false alarm detective pimento will be returning to his old desk Peralta will temporarily be moved to the break room questions what you do undercover I work for Jimmy the butcher Figgis that is an a-list mobster tell me literally everything everyone shut up pretty much just a bagman for him I mean I did some other stuff we usually try to tell funnier little stories well there's nothing funny about what I did for the butcher I've had to learn not to blink because every time I close my eyes I see a fresh horror Oh dark how do you keep your eyes moist no actually I have a very funny story about keeping my eyes moist hey this is my desk okay okay well now that that's out of the way I was just coming to let you know we're gonna work a B&E together we're gonna be partners nope I work alone plus the butcher says he has spies in the NYPD so I trust none of these dildos listen you can trust me I'm like obsessed with you fine tell me something you've never told another living soul ooh here's one I'm actually not strong enough to lift a water-cooler jug so I always find a way to make Terry do it here's mine Jimmy the butcher made me drive a croquet wicket through a guy's eyes into his brain brain leaked out his eyes like he was crying his own mind my goodness now that I've heard yours I feel like my watercolor thing could hold more juicy but no that was embarrassing for you a bond has been made feels good to trust again brother Wow either you are a cyborg or you're carrying so many weapons in this jacket hey kitchen now okay what's that man something's not right about that guy why just because it keeps threatening to kill me in the middle of a police precinct grow up because I'm physically attracted to him damn that's bad I'm only attracted creeps the vulture the ShamWow guy when I was a kid had a major crush on the evil gremlin stripe are you crazy yeah well I'm not gonna bone gizmo what careful with you Mentos it's gonna be fine oh hey can I borrow that Genevieve's out of town I need two phones so I can send her a front date and the baggage I don't want your ass in my cloud Adrian are you living in the break room no why do you ask ah because you're shaving your shoulder in our communal eating space you have a bed set up on the couch stuff like that fine busted my landlord kicked me out because my stupid neighbors couldn't handle a few tiny Knight screams I was dreaming that someone was trying to scalp me with a sharpened grapefruit spoon my brains fascinating I mean where does it come up with this stuff when I was undercover someone did try and scalp me with a sharpened grapefruit spoon sure that would do it aren't you dating Rosa can't you just stay with her oh yeah no we're doing this really hot thing where we haven't told each other where we live makes our sex play really erotic bar I totally get that well you let me know if there's anything I can do oh yes I will stay at your home thank you eat what no no you just said you wanted to help unless you weren't being serious which I would get I've been betrayed before for instance by the grapefruit spoon guy no no no no definitely you could stay with me ah you're the best Chuck thank you huh but for real get yourself some good earplugs because I really Don played how horrible those nights creams are hot all right I'll see you later Grammy dears cement Oh what's up what's up with you I need you to sign this report okay I'll sign your report what the hell careful being still wet maybe this'll help okay they got to knock that off loosen up start somewhere love baby it's March man shut up you punching holes yeah that's way too much paper not for me can't even get a cup of coffee well I'm off to find some yellow paper so I can do this all over again all right yes that's it what's going on with you two oh you noticed it yeah I noticed it everyone's noticed it a convicted pervert asked me if you guys could cool it I don't know what to tell you some between us Sarge something dark and urgent hmm I could have done that yeah I know you could have but you didn't I did I mean there are lots of other polls guys a whole street full of them so Adrian I'm gonna stop messing around and do this thing never what you know what I just realized I forgot something at home I'm just gonna my claws honey Shh it's okay I'm here monsters aren't real my little pierogi but I saw it was big and hairy you just had a nightmare buddy no it was real sure it felt that way but I I'm gonna open this closet and I'm gonna show you that there's nothing in there don't do that blah blah see hey Chuck its pimento and now Nicholas says he's too frightened to ever sleep again so that's just super duper I don't understand what he's so scared about if I was there to kill him he never would have heard me I think you told him several times god Nikolai's just having such a rich childhood can we back up what were you doing in Boyles closet in the first place well I still had a key from when I was crashing there last year and I wanted to shower and anoint my body with essential oils before I saw Rosa duh well she's gonna be so psyched that you're back where have you been all this time Vegas has been locked up for a month I was in prison in Uzbekistan it's actually not as bad as it sounds why were you in jail uh I got shot down smuggling ammo to a rebel group find an old Soviet prop plane they tortured us made me eat my co-pilots tongue move now I've got a taste for it the important thing is you're safe and sound and back in Brooklyn Thank You captain oh you smell good wowza and end of ugh okay what happened did she take the bait like a stupid fish yeah she invited us to go out with our gang tonight speaking of which captain any luck getting coke out of evidence one bag of primo blow as is the pro loans I still have reservations about this plan perhaps you could say your dealer ran out or he's summering in Nantucket now this is perfect if she gets wasted maybe she'll get sloppy and start talking plus I mean I can teach you guys how to fake take real drugs like a pro I used to do it all the time when I was undercover all you gotta do is close your nostril when you go down watch this oh nope I didn't do it that time I got a full snout full whoa okay no let me just try to get him a little rusty all you got to do just close the old Noster brownie in it oh boy yeah I got more that time did you get this Adrian that's enough oh we can make fake cocaine for ourselves out of vitamin B powder ooh vitamin B the second best vitamin guys I'm telling you the fake Storting can work what so much that time Oh anybody wanna listen to Jamiroquai right now Cam's gonna move this away from your nose holes well you two should get going if Hawkins tells you anything text me right away I'll stay here and watch Adrian boo thank you yeah all right hey yeah you guys play an instrument you know I play a little bit of bouzouki anybody else play an ancient string at instrument no you guys wanna go to the beach beautiful day just maybe like get out there throw the disc around right hey have you ever been to the Statue of Liberty captain have you have you been inside like under the skirt like what's up there did they build a you know what I'm saying [Music] you

Channel: Comedy Bites

Views: 1,758,417

Keywords: NBC, The Office US, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Michael Scott, Ron Swanson, Liz Lemon, Jake Peralta, Steve Carell, Nick Offerman, Andy Samberg, Tina Fey, brooklyn nine-nine i want it that way, brooklyn nine-nine bloopers, brooklyn nine-nine trailer, pimento brooklyn nine nine, adrian pimento ground rules, adrian pimento closet, adrian pimento screaming, big mouth jason mantzoukas

Id: 6PcHFyPOGGQ

Length: 10min 1sec (601 seconds)

Published: Wed Jan 08 2020