Doug Judy & Jake Peralta: BEST FRENEMIES | Brooklyn Nine-Nine | Comedy Bites

[Music] no no no he's not a cop he can't be wearing any of this it's just a windbreaker it's not like I gave him a badge and a gun yes both of those things it's not loaded that's when a cop gonna say a cool cop catchphrase New York's finest just got a whole lot funner Peralta it's no coincidence you owners ship you want a free cruise without entering a contest how do you think that happened I don't know maybe it's because I bought speed 2 on DVD and the internet realized that cruises were one of my interests great film sandy being a sarong but the tix Oh me I brought you here because I'm in peril peril don't my peril somebody's trying to kill me and I need protection so I'll set for my best friend I am NOT your best friend I'm your worst enemy get that through your head it's this kind of bickering it makes us such an adorable couple whatever Judi you're under arrest you can't arrest me boo we're in international waters which is also why I can smoke as much weed as I want welcome to the high seas no no way that that's true Amy tell me I can arrest him right now Judy's right we have no jurisdiction technically this boat flies under the flag of Uzbekistan Oh whose bags oh but do you know how many crimes we're forgiving 6 it's not so bad hundred no that's way more Grand Theft Auto Grand Theft Auto Grand Theft Auto Dawg fraud I saw the guy fake Pekinese towards the cat you will not win me over with your use of 12 wasn't trying to you're clearly friends with this man and you've lost your objectivity Peralta or have you lost your objectivity what are you doing my bad though we will even no just making a point here sit down since I'm going to jail I want to enjoy my time left on the outside put me up in 5-star hotel like the Royce unlimited room service and minibar privileges 3 star hotel like the Brooklyn earth $60 a day meal allowance no minibar four-star hotel like the Oneida 204 no minibar or alcohol but I get to go crazy on candy and this agreed oh one last thing Diaz has to be nice to me Omaha - call me big sugar huge mistake but she'll never agree to that no I mean let's do this big sugar Oh what alright fine if this is going down I want to be on this case and my sole focus is Doug Judy he never leaves my sights love it Pontiac bandit and Jake PB&J ride again reunited and it feels so good it's a doink you don't want this because we oh no no okay so you guys are which Europeans looking about Shelby I'll make the introductions wait we can't just be Europeans what country are we from what languages do you speak French Spanish some Portuguese obviously Greek enough Flemish to get by tight what about you brought um I can do a pretty good Italian accent you think you could milk me so you're just doing De Niro for me - parents I don't know am I it's a terrible dinner I don't know this is De Niro I think it's pretty good we'll just make you Mary okay I got to say the suit is growing on me that's good is it triple breasted somehow it's more such thing what about the girl in Total Recall triple bitties triple bitties I thought you'd be happy to see me being so weird oh I don't know I didn't sleep well last night so I'm probably tired from that oh and also this is a hostage situation Wow oh it's like that yes it's like that what the hell I thought you went straight I did I'm a hired car broker now I procure luxury vehicles for the rich and famous and I do it legally last we got dropped off a Bugatti to the kid the lists from stranger things you meant Aston was he cool do him and the rest of the gang hang out in real life you know what no we are not chatting right now you have three hostages you mean you Pam in the two bombs ain't not hostages I prefer to call them collateral friendships I gave them each 500 bucks on my own pocket thanks again to hug you the man died actually I'd rather still not be a hostage Pam hasn't come around on me yet tell I'm a nice person Jake I'm sorry officer are you friends with this criminal no not really absolutely best friend it's the Laird relationship friends judy smosh smosh [Music] who still sound like an angel sure thank God you would a Peralta I don't even let your best friend die I'm still gonna arrest you I just can't do that if you're dead what have you got to tell yourself baby steps it's hard get him out of his shell tell me about it every time we get emotional he's like noice smart okay can we focus up here Lobster Thermidor Baked Alaska it's so fancy don't even sound like food yeah come on or so or do it or no thanks I'm on duty come on Peralta are you gonna let the criminal have all the fun all right fine I'll have one Lobster Thermidor extra Thermidor on the side I have no idea what I'm ordering me neither we're like culinary Magellan's you know how we take this to the next level bras robes [Music] me I mean nobody saw him but there was a prolific car thief at the scene of the crime some of me I'm a cop now no you're not the one don't have a badge and a gun the dim blue line just got thick as hell come on shoot it's not loaded look if I was gonna jack a bunch of cars I wouldn't bring to New York's best detectives with me to the scene of the crime flattering this is nonsense you're off the case whoa whoa sir come on we're chasing a murderer a murderer that just stole a ton of cars who knows more about that world than Doug Judy Plus remember he doesn't get immunity unless he helps us bring his brother I know but do you want to get back her tea or not fine he's still on the case Angie got cops with the worst parking captain all over the right to have the pictures wherever they go the talking dog flies in outer space yes we won't take your deals if they think you're lying not lying I don't want to be a criminal I love my life as an average citizen I voted for the first time this year it breakfast for school board oh I don't know he had a funny name he deserves a shot that's why I voted for Stacy ladle anyways I'm sorry but they're not cutting a deal so sit I gotta turn myself in and let Holloway kill my mama actually there might be another way to get this done I'm taking good negotiator hostage if you come in here I will shoot him that was so much fun oh man you sounded really scary no no no it was are you trembling your voice sold it whatever he wants I just made that up I was so in the moment dude seriously you are a great hostage thanks Judy you're a great hostage taker one where is Judy I've looked everywhere he has to be somewhere on this boat no he doesn't sorry man Sun opening in a hat take I can't go to jail so cool you'll never get away from me dude II can't hear what you're saying you're real far away I'll just assume you're finally admitting we're best friends no that is not what I'm saying thank you means a lot to me enjoy the rest of your crew just remember you got a five lady don't be a Tang in the mud check your pocket boom boom boom boom but this isn't over I will hunt you to the ends in here I love you too I'm so proud of us for being able to sing what are you still standing there for go we'll be safe here I know the owner he'd never turn me yeah yeah I have the exact same relationship with a guy who runs the laser tag place I love I mean gun range hirato who you are here stun for huh I love laser tea we gotta go sometime man so can you say that I wasn't stunting no but it's done taking it's done it a little bit I've got this coupon for a private room yes right this way we already have a song cued up feet Judy what's up Peralta thank you so much for coming look I thought about it and I did you dirty I never meant to cause you any troubles yeah well you caused me a lot talking to a pre-recorded video but it's cool I know what you're saying I here you go my heart what am I doing here I feel the same way you're my best friend too look I'm not coming back start a new life here in San Diego stupid telling me where you are come on man I know damn San Diego everybody knows that place sobs here's what I'm gonna say though I'm sorry I won't be at your wedding but I did record you a CD of original smoosh jams that will consummate the marriage it's on the table next to you along with a little something else my french kraler curse a pot now look inside it the diamonds yes I cannot believe you actually brought the diamonds yeah mistime that one no you're the best look even though I am a scorpion I will never drown your adorable little frog ass so that's what I had to say I'm sure I'll see you again at some point now that coupon you got there it's for a full hour in the private room [Music] you

Channel: Comedy Bites

Views: 1,483,542

Rating: 4.9559021 out of 5

Keywords: NBC, The Office US, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Michael Scott, Ron Swanson, Liz Lemon, Jake Peralta, Steve Carell, Nick Offerman, Andy Samberg, Tina Fey, brooklyn nine-nine i want it that way, brooklyn nine-nine bloopers, brooklyn nine-nine trailer, doug judy rosa song, doug judy wedding, doug judy brooklyn nine nine, jake doug judy, jake doug judy karaoke, jake and judy karaoke

Id: SFQiBfSoEaI

Length: 10min 2sec (602 seconds)

Published: Wed May 27 2020