Best of Game Grumps: Chess, Checkers, & Chinese Checkers

[Music] hello what's up suckers oh you ready for some hot high octane chess action oh snap yeah this is an experiment uh yeah this is like a little art house game grumps project let's just play it and see what happens get out of my way pawn are you knighting you getting there oh yeah he's gonna move out of the way sorry oh my god embarrassing this game was uh a little thing called supercharged [Laughter] man that night he's really got places to go excuse me sorry [Laughter] no big deal remember that i'm behind you whoa oh yeah make fun of me maybe i'll just [ __ ] cease to exist that's just like trying to get you pumped it's like it's like are you sleeping reminder yes oh oh god oh god i'm sorry and it's just regular oh no oh no well there it is oh and um there's there's the there's there's the chest wait shake it around little bit i'm still playing though shake it around i told you this game's trying to keep it interesting yeah it's it wait go up nope no yeah oh yeah yeah there we go let's see how long this holds out i saved the world with that [ __ ] oh my god this game sucks here comes the bishop in a wonderful way oh he's going for your [ __ ] he's he he got the bish and here's the thing about battle chess they battle but you're oh snap is there a chance that you can win no it goes into like a street fighter style fighting game yeah get him little pawn the bishop has a super move where he prays to god and god's hand comes down and it punches you it just punches that's actually what i thought this game was i thought get him go little guy yeah jesus i don't well i guess where did you get that from i don't know can all pawns do that [ __ ] outside the castle seems weird are there different bits for each like combination so if a pawn kills like a knight is it something different i don't know we'll find out it's been uh one week since you looked at me oh come on whenever somebody i don't it's funny because that happens so many times in life when people say it's been and they just like stop right so i use it all the time it just in my life oh yeah so to answer your question i um oh guys he's forcing the issue [Laughter] he's doing the bishop issue he's yeah the bishosh the vicious what's your bish-ish bro oh man looks i'm not like a bishop i'm more bitch-ish [Laughter] sup bish nothing much [ __ ] i'm gonna get [ __ ] oh are you pawning bro i'm getting this [ __ ] party are you pawning yeah yeah we're gonna loosen this [ __ ] up oh damn yo that pond's gonna get that pawn dog this is the most intense battle i've ever seen pawn versus pawn oh yeah that's [ __ ] up i thought he was gonna stab him through the heart i thought he was gonna do the trap door again but i was mistaken no so i guess when pawns fight it's whoever can bash the other guy on the toe first and get him hopping in pain which is a common practice in medieval days yes it is actually it was in the handbook of uh was it what was it uh the the art of war yes uh sun tzu i believe sun tzu was the one who was like hit that [ __ ] all up on the foot you just open up the book it's like dedicated to the pawns hit that [ __ ] all up on the foot don't even get me [ __ ] started [Laughter] sun tzu yeah i like the way they fall with their arms like ah like they just kind of like oh my little pawns doesn't stand a chance ouch look how big that guy is ouch and ouch dude can you [ __ ] get into this high octane oh bam look at that look like what he looked more confused to be honest like he was just like i don't know why did he fight me man that queen is saucy looking she's she's she's a saucy dame she's got hips and boobs for days she does uh look at that one pixel cleavage oh baby baby show me that pixel show me that slightly red miscolored pixel does that do anything for you oh baby take off your 10 by 10 tile set girl i want to see it he's he's definitely got the advantage time out can i get a t-o oh i'm feeling too old that sounds delightful oh i just stabbed that [ __ ] oh damn wow ah i'm magic or something [ __ ] yeah queenie she's here queenie she's here to get this sassy yeah that night is [ __ ] or next time on game grumps we'll see how this resolves oh wait it's resolving right now [Laughter] all right we'll finish this next time oh and now she's going to put me in check that angle what a [ __ ] damn what a stone cold [ __ ] dang yo that's harsh dog joe that's mega harsh bro yeah it is it is yo if that queen comes into that king dawg shit's gonna get real it's gonna get extremely real what are you thinking what are you thinking bro what's going through your head [Laughter] run it by me run it by me yeah they're just like whatever hey we're cool berries zoom in on those pawns sup we'll just chill here the whole game yeah i mean i don't really care uh one way or another literally what the [ __ ] ever i get paid whether the king dies or not because i mean it's all in hr now [Laughter] oh you [ __ ] dickish little bastard you rogish little monkey [ __ ] he might have made his first mistake move oh oh a little kung fu ball kick right in the night nuts man i like this game it's got a little sense of humor yeah i like it too man oh that's not a fair fight that's not a fair fight at all dude the pawn put up a fight yeah he's doing his best nevermind [ __ ] night was decimated in a second i know i know that [ __ ] is dead though uh all right oh some hot girl on girl action time i gotta see what this looks like i gotta get me a piece of this nonsense they literally are just like well i mean just give them what they want and then the animation's just like well wow wow oh oh my god later baby girl straight up [ __ ] annihilation oh god it's so humiliating to have your queen taken out by a pawn though seriously let's see what this see what this sequence is saucy brad oh oh my god jesus whoa whoa i'm not sure i i'm not sure i approve of that yeah that's right it was very serious that was like the only one that had like a sound too she like let out a shriek i'm gonna [ __ ] rock monster his uh his pawn excuse me excuse me he like farts right next to the blue pawn is like they just got to stay there could you please move me oh here comes the bashing yeah this game is kind of funny i love how it's really slow too though he's just kind of like just like squish i feel sorry for this little bastard but he's pretty boned seriously they're so weird here they are iron man 3. oh yeah which we still never finished by the way oh yeah i gotta i got to show you the ending we watched iron the the iron man trilogy oh son of a [ __ ] uh well he's trapped right now yeah well he only has to are we cool [Laughter] hey uh no hard feelings i know i told your mom that she was a a corporate building just a i mean come on right am i right excuse me i know i called your sister alcatraz when i was dating her but come on alcatraz oh wait you're right i did god damn it i totally did i totally [ __ ] did i wasn't thinking oh no what is he what what is his [ __ ] doing he [ __ ] up oh no no i didn't check my checkmate myself because he would have oh he's protecting his rook now yeah but that [ __ ] don't matter son because check this out you ready for this [ __ ] yeah boom oh my god oh my god indeed my friend how did you queen baby so he's got only one move he's gonna take it he's gonna take it but then i'm gonna take that with the rook and then it's check [ __ ] mate [ __ ] oh [ __ ] yeah wow all right so grab a little heat and come along with me cause your mama don't mind what your mama can't say oh my god he just ate the queen he's straight up ate the queen yo right in the middle of my [ __ ] death leopard lyrics so he aided the queen he hated that queen yeah oh nice we get a little [ __ ] kick the king's ass uh animation yeah man wow submit to me look at him he's like oh well i guess i'll get into position [Laughter] oh [ __ ] oh awesome flat island yeah glorious come at me [ __ ] aaron and danny win are you getting wacky are you getting wacky with the opening i'm feeling a little bit like i'm gonna i'm gonna [ __ ] destroy you really yeah i'm i'm feeling cocky right now are you here yeah i'm feeling super cocky i uh i like i like your cocky i got the [ __ ] out i prepared my [ __ ] right now i am feeling cocky you know what i just realized we could do entire episodes of game grumps with our dicks just fully out and no one would ever know what do you mean could [Laughter] i don't know if you've looked to the right any time soon oh my god yeah no that's your dick no not right now oh just like just like a while ago a couple days ago maybe yeah during frolf while you were enraptured with like slapping frogs around yeah my dick was out nice yeah i didn't hear about that i'm thinking what's that i'm in a bad spot i have immediately [ __ ] up i've brought shame upon the blue eagle army so you're gonna you're gonna take that you're gonna take him i don't understand why i wouldn't i failed to leave him protected i think the slow walk lets you just like let you think about the mistakes that you've made in life yeah okay well just do a little charity work right here i think that you and i need to have a talk about uh jesus really oh yeah oh absolutely yeah what uh what's he got to say that's so important well nothing anymore he's dead but when he comes back he's gonna he's probably gonna kick your ass you're probably right because you're being a dick because you're being a big old dad and that's your bad you're right that's your bad i'm embarrassed slide back in here then you sure you want that to happen yeah very sure oh okay it protects everybody and stabilizes my forces and makes your night very weirdly vulnerable why would you sacrifice your knight to take out another knight oh my god barry like much like oregon trail because uh this game is played in the vacuum of space can we get a little like exciting chess background music thanks buddy there it is oh man that's making me feel that's an issue intense oh it's like medieval times dinner and tournament up in this [ __ ] [Applause] oh they're doing the knights of knee thing that's awesome wow yeah man i mean like these guys were all just guys they're just bros just brewing it up all right well in a bro like fashion i guess i'll just get some rocks and we're done oh he does a little leg like oh what a world kick that's that's death for you i mean it just comes at you it's quacky zany okay oh boy what are you thinking with that night there you're going crazy in the night get it oh crazy in the night [Music] do it go aaron all right fine crazy in the night crazy in the night crazy in the night i look at you sneaky time somebody's taking a trip to sneaky time junction you don't know what's going on with me you got no idea yeah come on now come on now yes you get it [Laughter] oh man your pawn yeah oh that pawn yeah you cannot penetrate my wall of pawn huh huh with that pawn it's not just a little [ __ ] of an of a time that was a thing i didn't think of [Laughter] so just throwing that out there oh man you just have to like retreat forever i i guess i'll just yeah yeah what are you gonna do what are you gonna do billy you [ __ ] up shut up yeah oh dang are you taking out that pawn oh i have to i have to go the way that like interrupts the bishop the bishop's like oh he could have just [ __ ] walked left god damn it i i am a man of god shouldn't it shouldn't have dropped the g damn it there and then when he walks by he's like oh no no of course i'll move yeah yeah totally totally god be with you yeah ah makes total sense uh lord be praised that's the most efficient way in my opinion club oh i blocked it club yeah blocked that too shadang yeah blocked it one more time this is the one oh okay yeah i'm [ __ ] up i love how it's the exact same fight sequence every time what can we do to ensure that people will get as tired of this game as possible as quickly as possible yo what's up bishop i'm the rook drop the brace drop the bird the rook really wants to be like a rap artist but like everyone's like rooks can't rap [Music] [Laughter] that's what the king said to him yeah he's like yo listen to my beats mr king you see i'm gonna [ __ ] go and go pee and then he's like brooks can't rap yeah and looks like i'll show do you remember my life yeah go ahead and take that pawn i don't even want him anyway god i love you what are you gonna do with that bishop now that he's in a useless spot huh i don't know tingle tangle tinkle tangle bang i wonder if there's oh yeah oh he fell a different way than i'm used to that's nice what do you think of that mr sass man mr sass man bring me a dream [Laughter] make it the sassiest i've ever seen that's right my bishop knows his [ __ ] yo he went to he [ __ ] even though he's a man of god yo he was in the army for like 17 years i didn't see the night [Laughter] chess is the ultimate [ __ ] game of gotcha oh [ __ ] [Laughter] i stand tremendously correct oh that's funny i do want to tell you yes i'm very bad at chess i just want to be clear fair enough well the only way you can stop it is by sacrificing your queen i totally hit it i was gonna move down right and i don't know why i did not damn i'm gonna tell you what what's that i'm gonna tell you a little something about me tell tell me i'm very dumb it's not it's you're not dumb chess just makes you feel dumb like it's that type of game i wanna i wanna give you a little tip excuse me excuse me it'll help you in fighting me excuse me yeah just assume i'm an idiot right yeah and everything will go right oh oh it's jiggly everybody's jiggly wow right now oh man he couldn't just like disintegrate her that would have been nice you should just like zoom in on him and just like with like a like a subtitle just be like man of god yeah barry do that for us oh [ __ ] here comes the king ready to [ __ ] avenge the loss of oh my god oh i don't even know he blew a hole right through the [ __ ] bishop guard wow that was hilarious and cool yeah i don't know what i'm doing i got no plan let's get that hot queen butt a shaken i really like flan a shaking and a bacon [Music] i don't like your tone super not a hundred percent in love with your tone right now not into it not feeling it not into it not into a batch i guess i'll just [ __ ] whatever why why do you have to [ __ ] oh sorry i know this makes the game excruciatingly slow and painful when you know you're kind of aft go ahead and take the [ __ ] i don't even give a [ __ ] oh i totally [ __ ] that up i totally [ __ ] that up why did you do that because i'm stupid what's up what's up what's up with the king come on run me through your process [Laughter] maybe i can help you out you know save you a little bit of time uh i think uh you're totally [ __ ] because i think that too do you i'm right there right there with you buddy you can go for it i want to give you a noogie i want to kill myself calculating millions of possibilities i think this is the right um i'm thinking lincoln you know our 16th president did you move your bishop here yes from here yes i see well then i'm super pumped about this aren't i just a happy camper ferg you're in a weird kind of spot i know i you don't have to tell me that i'm sorry i know that i want to stab your brains out oh i know chess chess will do that can i unpace this what the [ __ ] is on pasay yeah [ __ ] can i ask you to go home yeah get out of my house yeah well so i can make you do a dumb move and then i take your queen just out of satisfaction just because taking the queen feels way better than taking the cake yeah if it's i don't i don't like to throw the word delicious around a lot you're [ __ ] delicious don't bring that rook out oh i have to you [ __ ] ass it's go time man don't bring that [ __ ] wrong don't bring them don't don't [ __ ] don't bring that rook don't even i am deliberating on whether to kick your ass or to just decimate it yeah wow that sounds pretty hot actually thanks i'm gonna do some dirty work here okay by that i mean i'm gonna smear my [ __ ] all over your face whoa yeah that's right i'm a trash talker i'm a man-eater i guess yeah i know what you're trying to do but you ain't gonna do it unless of course there's something i'm not looking at i mean which is usually the case all right we're good i'm gonna do it how are you gonna are you are you this is what you're gonna do to me i'm gonna [ __ ] eat this rook go for it see if i give two frogs fat asses delicious use your sexy feminine wiles queenie girl all right raise your arms like you just don't care why um but i don't want to stop that that's too much is the work is for me i've got way too many things going on i got a king to move one space away from the queen i'm super biz go ahead go ahead shuffle your little feeds get those tiny feet to juggling all right here's here's the deal okay on the rook okay he's coming no he's not yeah i just wanna time to regulate i hate you all right oh on gaku baby i don't know what that means yeah from dragon ball z move it out of what gakku everybody's favorite gaku move that move that tubby ass out of the way [ __ ] all right [Laughter] whoa oh my god oh it's getting crazy why don't i just do that oh that's why oh [ __ ] is this okay no it's a [ __ ] glitch but whatever is that because i hit my foot on the ground yeah sorry it's your fault yeah is that nice to look at everybody just that constantly happening all over the screen i i hate pawns can i just oh dear yeah chill out oh things are getting terrible chill out with your movie whoa whoa your bishop's getting wacky yeah i think he might need to go home and sleep go up and think about some things i mean what is there for me to do other than to die it's round about that time that's uh that's right where i'm thinking the the math is gonna be nope [Laughter] oh goodness nope nope [Laughter] uh excuse me mr king i'm gonna need you to move out of my way thanks oh yes by all means oh yes and he just stands right next to him in the elevator like awkwardly after he's like really rude to him oh come on queenie yeah queenie with a peony [Laughter] so proud of yourself oh [ __ ] yeah that's some sauce happening right now that is sauce that's a little saucy just made like an elbow fart i saw it it was very interesting i'm like a hand fart [Laughter] [Music] that makes me feel very good it's so delicate too so you have to have like a delicate result wait when the pond dies can you hand fart it thank you he's just kind of like uh uh i'm just throwing a guess out there right but i think uh you just [ __ ] me in the ass wow but in like a loving way that's still an ass [ __ ] i used lube and like i care i want you to be happy i'm gonna go ahead and do that now oh [ __ ] a direct [ __ ] attack on my pizzity pawn yeah you know what i think about that though what's that that just leaves me more open than uh i don't really like it that much yeah take the night son take the knights shake back the night son um like i'll get there when i get there um i don't care what the queen does to the [ __ ] knight he gives a goddamn oh and now it is check check mate is it yeah because he can't move nowhere mm-hmm the roof is on fire hey girl we don't need no water let that [ __ ] burn mother queen oh get it done watch the queen take out that king i hope she blows him to death i hope she's just like i don't [Music] think you're fit to be king that was wow i guess we're just done then all right was that just like it was just like like centuries of [ __ ] built up like aggression yeah like come on wait yeah culminating in a head fart you'd be like oh man well we hope you enjoyed all this battle chess it was fun it was it was very good yeah it was good times uh danny wins i mean we'll throw that in there because it needs to be said um but eric can you erase having said that so um barry just make danny say like danny danny i lost my powers no that's the saddest thing of all i'm sorry oh it's okay next time on game grubs something completely different okay oh [ __ ] oh my [ __ ] god welcome to the goddamn [ __ ] it where's your wemo oh i put it somewhere it's your you need it i don't know it's over here okay thank you welcome to the well then ultimate board game collection classics from around the world all y'all [ __ ] checker enthusiasts yo you don't understand how hardcore we are oh [ __ ] oh damn dude we're playing classic mode yo yeah strategy is too hard and i don't have a family so let's do classic yo we're gonna play the most hardcore game of checkers you ever goddamn scene in your [ __ ] life all y'all [ __ ] out there that have been writing us every day and being like everyone's been writing us jenny [Laughter] and i'm here um [Laughter] i don't understand why difficulty would be an issue because plant checkers like makes the pieces like spiked yeah ah this is very difficult to play these are tipped all right deadly gas god man you people have been like writing us every day being like when are you guys going to play checkers on the show and you know what it happened yeah it happened just today does that feel good [ __ ] today does that feel good it feels super good move your [ __ ] thing before those dogs crash into us done you're [ __ ] am i yeah you're straight [ __ ] dude i i'm not i'm gonna i'm gonna lead you into a an area of despair right here this is this is my kill zone right here this is this is this is the the mad week bro area what if we're like that mad weak bro area i like the [ __ ] it's just like the world before you yes i actually would prefer if there were like a king kong level to this where you have to like like swat down the planes oh [ __ ] they are doing mad tricks like i understand the biplane but like this is a [ __ ] like a commuter like uh yeah there's people on that plate it's crazy okay boom reinforcing my [ __ ] [Music] sorry dude look at my [ __ ] tight-knit group they roll deep yeah that's true that's true this is some funky ass music too i know right it's like yeah let's play some [ __ ] checkers game of checkers we're gonna have fun at the party tonight playing goddamn checkers i really gotta think this through brah no you don't i gotta think this through bros ass [ __ ] checkers check that [ __ ] what are you gonna do now what are you gonna do what are you gonna do what are you doing this and what does that accomplish huh what does that accomplish nothing really pretty sure [ __ ] [ __ ] damn it god oh damn it wait wait wait wait oh hold on hold on hold on checkers is the ultimate game of like [ __ ] yeah what are you gonna do now you're gonna take that piece i'm gonna take your piece oh oh you think it's so good i didn't think of it i didn't even i didn't even i forgot about it okay we're off to a terrible start yo this time this time is the one yeah [ __ ] [Laughter] come here i don't want to touch you no don't touch me do it because you're always on top this is not there's no time for holding hands get away from my [ __ ] hands oh no no no it's weird you got to figure out your piece your move while i'm trying to move your hands high five [Laughter] all right all right what's my jam what's my move jam i don't know what's your move jim um my move jam is to jam rock to this region oh [ __ ] jamarock a shamrock that is not a saying that people say yeah well says you nose literally says everybody i think you're wrong do it aaron i'm gonna i'm gonna be ballsy here okay balls to the wall that is ballsy balls of the goddamn that is absolutely the ballsiest [ __ ] i've ever seen this is the most intense game i've ever played i'm [ __ ] jazz dude i i too am jest i i feel i feel a hard [ __ ] shot of jazz coming at me um gross but also awesome uh okay okay okay okay this is tough yo this is jazz or sex [Laughter] you want to give that another shot jazz okay nurse we need to perform an immediate jazzer section i oh this is hard his kidneys aren't funky enough so tough all right uh bang right yeah that's a good move is it a good move yeah you don't even you don't even know how to play checkers what do you mean i don't know how to play checkers you said you didn't know i don't know how to play chinese checkers oh what are you super racist all of a sudden i don't know how to do chinese anything the hell is wrong with you in asians wow that's a huge leap you just made there that's a huge leap you just moved stop do not move that piece okay no stop simple i hope like like like seven minutes in these just like collide in a fiery like unnecessary plane explo oh no what did you do oh i didn't mean to do that for real what did you do did you move it there it's not important did you oh man you're [ __ ] i'm totally [ __ ] and uh there you go yup i [ __ ] that up pretty harshly dude yep oh man i'm i won pretty much yeah yeah we are we are at a point of no return now why did you do that it was a mistake i didn't mean to oh sure oh this is very very bad you want me to comfort you no get away from my hand please oh you want some don't you get away come on okay [ __ ] ass clown i'm not an ass clown you're the one who made the bad move you are the clown of ass we're tied now for the record but you didn't ask clownery yes yeah i'm gonna force your hand brah oh wait no never mind i don't want that to happen that's probably a bad idea i'm gonna ah oh i want a sandwich oh [ __ ] stain dude fudge do something fudge town fudge town usa oh god [ __ ] oh god oh it's like satan empty distractions oh man what do you do what do you oh you think you can get away with that huh i do yeah in fact i'm absolutely sure of it how about this now try to advance brah [Music] we have a problem you know now what you must do what just declare me the ultimate victor dude this is an issue my name's not victor though it's aaron i did not [ __ ] i am not as good at checkers as i once thought i mean all your corner pieces are safe sort of kind of if they're not they're not i'm i'm [ __ ] beyond belief you could have i could have what aaron i don't know what could i have done i don't know all right god you're making me flustered this game is a bunch of her suppose nice work dude what do you think it felt like to be the the guitar guy who's like laying down this [ __ ] i get the feeling that may not be a real guitar in the studio i get the feeling that you're gonna win this do you think so yeah it's probably my only chance is if one of those planes crashes into your side of the board i get the feeling i'm getting the feeling wait was there like a weird voice that just clicked in yeah there was a woman that just said something yeah poetic and beautiful checkers but this game's real fun check purse my camera and i used to play this but she'd always beat me because she's got like i don't know 50 years on me this has been a hoot see you and i we get each other let me communicate rematch okay i demand an immediate rematch all right an immediate rematch right now no next time on game grumps let's just [ __ ] do this oh my god all right all right go tired of [ __ ] done rematch time dude dan you are fired the [ __ ] up dude i am i'm uh [ __ ] i'm going to hackers for checkers i couldn't think of anything i know how you feel dude daddy no like give me the chocolate baby almond joy's got nuts oh [ __ ] me yeah you did it again yeah jumped right into it what happens dude that is not what happened no it's what happens twice in a row actually you've proven that it's true that that is what happens oh man this is a [ __ ] this is a [ __ ] right in my right in my [ __ ] region oh my penis is full erect right now just from the tears of your tears you're so sad that your tears are crying boy who among us has not gotten a good cry boner from time to time i know yo you better you better move a piece or two because i'm feeling a little i'm feeling a little left out over here just leaving me high and dry without any pieces to steal you know what i'm saying oh [ __ ] what are you gonna do now brah training bra oh [ __ ] yeah you're going in for the kisity kill bro except not moving out of the way and then what are you gonna do you're gonna get [ __ ] you're gonna try to get king well that's probably a good idea well that's exactly what's going to happen then good good good well shh [Laughter] shut up okay [Laughter] [Applause] yo we're rocking and rolling now i can just sit on your face like oh [ __ ] just got so much more real yeah i'm just gonna i'm just gonna i'm just gonna do this you know i'm just gonna advance yo i'm just gonna advance i'm just gonna [ __ ] i'm just gonna do my little dance in advance in those pants all over this jizz bomb all right you got problems son [Laughter] [ __ ] oh i don't like this yeah i know i don't i don't like this at all checkers is a [ __ ] of a game because you can feel yourself like losing way before it happens i just screwed myself dude [Music] all right that's what you wanted right that's the thing you wanted you figured me out daddy-o [ __ ] oh checkers you are the cruelest of mistresses god criminy dude criminy how do i have more pieces and less points because you don't do the double jumps except just then except for that one time that you just did a double jump yeah all right i'm letting you [ __ ] pull that shaft oh yeah yeah you want a [ __ ] gizzity go bra i'll i mean i'll go but i'll yeah frankly yes judging are you ready for this action oh no no i forgot you can do that i forgot you can do that oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] oh ah my leg no oh that's uncool dude so tasty that is not the best thing for me right now oh that move did not take into account my feelings i didn't think about that i was trying to set up for like a mad [ __ ] i know desert storm situation deserts and you [ __ ] over my giblets bro oh [ __ ] now my giblets might be [ __ ] over yeah it's rifle it's [ __ ] up oh now you can't do it all right what's my best move none they're all terrible all right shut up for a second all right let me think out loud everything is awful for you i want to know what you think about the situation about the check guys about the come on i'm gonna oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] oh god damn it god [ __ ] damn it dude jesus christ man [ __ ] holy [ __ ] bro oh this is an incredibly intense game of checkers my [ __ ] jimmies are rustled yeah yeah why is there like a 1940s red baron plane just flying around with these like normal 747 why are these [ __ ] commuter jets doing flips and [ __ ] we'll be cruising at an altitude of like oh my god oh my god sorry i i'm going crazy over here let's say come on baby give me give me love and give me love and come on don't stop it's like it's like stop i said i love you just kidding oh i got it can you catch up can you catch up are you mustard or are you ketchup you shall not have me go go get your hand out the way bruh oh yeah i got 10 points for that [ __ ] what do you think of that i don't know i don't know how the point system works what do you [ __ ] think of that you'll never [ __ ] catch me do you [ __ ] look at that what do you think of that you son of a [ __ ] [Laughter] look at a licky [ __ ] whoa [ __ ] real good i'm cool okay look at me [Music] this is very uncomfortable oh man what's up tiny little shitty piece what's up what's up [ __ ] looks like all shitty pieces getting [ __ ] [ __ ] out oh you [ __ ] you straight [ __ ] i'm not entirely sure if i'm [ __ ] i don't think that's what [ __ ] is yo what do you think of that just jumped over your piece i see that very impressive thank you dude you have three kings i have two i know i'm about to have four i don't think so i don't stink so oh really how explain to me how you can [ __ ] possibly stop this from i'll show you by doing with my words okay and i win oh [Laughter] i mean i mean that doesn't mean you win that's game over yeah but that's a that's a 1v1 now now we're at a stalemate danny and aaron both win we gotta do we gotta do a rematch i cannot [ __ ] deal with another no no not at checkers what we gotta do a rematch like [ __ ] word naval chinese checkers no no i don't know how you're doing it how to play chinese we are [ __ ] doing it what is this like our [ __ ] like ultimate checkers super episode we're doing it next time on game games we know we are playing chinese checkers guys we don't both know how to play damn it all right fine fine [ __ ] hey welcome back okay dan uh and i both had a one win at regular checkers right so we're taking it up asian style neither of us know how to play chinese check so i'm moving my my ball or something i don't [ __ ] know all right let's let's make this interesting what the [ __ ] is happening with that train let's make this interesting i'm gonna grab that ray gun out of space-time and shoot you with it wait come back no oh no that rocket no but going holy crap dude you're [ __ ] rocking my [ __ ] thanks for noticing dude that train is really bugging me out i'm gonna get to that side way before you dude impossible stop not just impossible but impossible which is like a delicious italian form of impossible which is like an olive garden like seasonal special [Laughter] oh absolutely [ __ ] do you see how far i've advanced dude i'm straight up shingeki no kyojin right here what does that mean that means the advancing titans it's the japanese name of attack on titan oh that's awesome dude you're gonna [ __ ] be amazed at the [ __ ] i pulled off next oh yeah yeah yeah you're gonna be like god damn it i love him i wish you were mine what are you gonna do what kind of [ __ ] are you gonna pull off check this check it out oh i don't think so i don't think so baby i'm going all the w well i guess i'm going to go over here wait hold on what are you going to do hold on i got that you're going to go like that and then you're going to go like that and then you're going to you don't even [ __ ] know brother you don't even know so this game is as sneaky as the chinese themselves oh all right i'm glad we got that one edit that one check this [ __ ] blocked your ass blocked your ass your ass is blocked you most certainly did oh wait that this game is [ __ ] sneaky this game is super this is a sneaky ass [ __ ] game i like it though i am not feeling the love from this game i am enjoying myself holy [ __ ] imagine playing this with six people dude oh god and they're all chinese can we get what don't look at me like i'm a racist uh well what should i look at you like them like i'm hilarious and cool dude wow dude holy crap you shouldn't get no kyogen all over me dude chinese checkers is rad i take back everything i said i didn't mean to i didn't want to do that no i didn't want to do that this game is very easy to do that with like accidentally drop it chinese checkers is the [ __ ] raddest game i've ever played yeah i'm i'm literally after this going out and buying a chinese checkerboard so we all play it yeah yeah that robot's like holy [ __ ] come on love the way you touched my people yeah oh that's nice oh love the way you touched my poo-poo yeah touch that poo-poo got a big huge dick in my mouth tonight gonna [ __ ] a dude gonna [ __ ] a dude baby come on that's a good song check this out boom to the shack of [ __ ] laughing god do you see that [ __ ] you're like cuberting your way up the [ __ ] screen very impressive i am a [ __ ] god damn [ __ ] savant at this [ __ ] i call this maya double shamalama bama holy from alabama uh you're gonna jump over my head come on if you do you might be dead come on oh i'm gonna touch you where you don't want and then you can't sue me look at that i made points i just made points i made porn i made those i will present them to you in the toilet bowl of life [ __ ] you moved wait hold on you see that [ __ ] yeah i see what i just did i see it do you see this i see it that is [ __ ] a nightmare for you i am i am half in the bag already dude that means you're drunk i am halfway winning okay look my piece is like boom boom i am so mad at you darn kids did you just get a little drunk for a second yeah whoa easy buddy finally you [ __ ] wised up to it oh yeah your [ __ ] conduit i did it i won i won i won the money i did that the money is mine i want the money what did you become that's from [ __ ] um that's from uh vegas vacation there's like the old guy playing like the kino lottery or whatever he's he gets the winning ticket he's like one the money is mine i won the money [Laughter] wow i [ __ ] love that movie dude you're like right on my tail now what the heck happened uh chinese checkers [Laughter] listen we're playing this game for keeps not for weeps yeah for it's it's for real real not for play play yeah yeah misdirection yeah [ __ ] i've won i want the money [Laughter] the morning is morning this movie sounds awesome it's parts of it are good yeah it's one of those movies that probably i have more of an affection for than anyone else in the world [ __ ] blowers all right i'm setting up my victory for myself i want the money the money is mine nice i like this [ __ ] like like this like bar chord moving music gather round the corner half a mile from here see that long train run and i want to disappear [Music] what the [ __ ] do i do uh you give up and uh call me the victor no and bow down to me i'll win to money more i want money till the mornings i really want to see this oh god wow wow wow yeah yeah holy wow yeah i saw that happening oh my god wow now i'm going to win you're us yours you're seven whoa whoa whoa did she just say please start again again yeah it's very weird like a timid tepid voice i think she's like dictating the music she's like alright i changed the song it's supposed to be like a like a vj i'm sorry it burped again oh god oh it's the worst it's like oh it makes me want to die inside because my insides are dying okay okay [Laughter] can i use your pieces here come on come on move where i want move where i want where i want to yeah come on you're gonna jump it baby get out of my sight yeah you got [ __ ] i [ __ ] you that half circle that half hex see that half hex i [ __ ] you cool [ __ ] you real good cool story in the anal whoa bring the shrink right in the swanky spank and the schwink digging it straight down in the schwink dog damn the head of my penis is inside your anus aaron stop oh it's just digging poo out you know it's like mushroom shaped so gross stick it in and then i like pull it out aaron focus please underneath i beg you to shut up oh dip dawg dip straight dip bro come on come on i probably fudged myself i don't know i don't know who's fudging who right now well you know what i wish was happening right now [ __ ] casio keyboard players like there we go fooling around with the goddamn with the goddamn nonsense and such all right gonna help my bros getting to the base come on sitting in the holes getting all excited i'm so horny i could [ __ ] a dude but i won't because i don't like dudes probably some of your best work thanks gotta pee about now gotta poo about now about when all right about now okay funk funk funk soul brother right about now i won money i honestly think you're screwed brah i might be i think you're super screwed i think you're super screwed um because i think i won this i think i won this right about now funk's old brother check it out now folks old brother uh scratch that i'm five moves away no oh [ __ ] this game god damn it i'm gonna lose because of that oh i'm sorry to hear it bro so frustrating hold on hold on boom [Music] oh oh [ __ ] god damn in the chinese checkers we didn't even know how to play rematch oh man [ __ ] aaron hansen the victory of all games that was super fun ever played between my friend dan and i that was super fun who may no longer be my friend yeah sorry about that thing i said about chinese people i i don't believe that that's well it was the heat of the moment i got i got taken that's up for debate i got caught in the czechus fifa all right next time on game grumps [ __ ] much much more love much more hatred emotions are high eat a dick uh gas levels are low i haven't told you to eat a dick in a long time gas prices really yeah well i mean now that streak is broken now it's been five seconds should we have like a little like a little like zero days yeah eat a dick dance told aaron to eat a dick and then there's like a party streamer sound like we've been 100 days without dan calling and saying eat a dick aaron hey hello and welcome to oh what is this i would try to get to the title screen but it just doesn't it doesn't work this game's so old and it's so laggy and it's so well it is old in that it's from 1998 but it's all it's this is virtual chess 64. it also is 10 years more recent than battle chess for ness which it looks worse than that yeah which is a better game all right so i'm playing against dan i'm i'm the white side and he's the black side right i'm what the [ __ ] is what is what the f oh my god i would imagine move the wooden arrow spear over what you want what the [ __ ] this is horrible this is horrible all right push a button yeah yeah jesus stop moving around oh boy we have to use the scene oh come on all right we have to use the same controller here we go this is when was this gate who invented this game i don't i do not there's battle chests that are way better than this i couldn't agree more jesus there you go you're moving that night yeah thanks for the controller dan no problem buddy are you threatening that are you threatening well then i will i will back that up i will back that pawn up yeah not that ass because that that's gonna that's got a mind of its own this is so ugly to look at oh my god wait till you get to the fight scene dan oh oh does it have fight scenes like a battle chest what is this why did you move your horse there it's a night first of all oh well i'm trying different techniques this time yeah uh yeah i was wondering i was like why is that night there this is like the worst perspective i can't see the pawns this is very ugly is there a way to like change it to top view so that we can see what the [ __ ] is going on i don't know maybe we can maybe there is no okay we gotta we gotta start taking some pieces so you can see the real magic in this game what is that why is that there why did you do that check this out oh [ __ ] what do you think of that action i think do you think that's hot and sexy and sultry yeah yeah i do actually is that giving you a raging harden [Laughter] is that giving you a large hadron collider yeah it is they're gonna collide with my hadron that's a never joke that's a never joke as in it's never been made or never will be made you're just gonna take it huh oh no you're not just gonna take it i'm gonna back that ass up oh you well you're about to take it in other ways you can't fight my wall of impending pawn doom fondue well what if i escape again you mean to the only place you can possibly go then swaddle you do now i am on the run consistently and you've advanced you're right can't argue with that how do you feel about that [ __ ] [Laughter] oh goodness gracious no don't dan don't wha what do you mean don't don't move it no stop i'm scared of the potential action that will ensue ah my part is threatened i mean maybe it is maybe it isn't it's hard to know because so many [ __ ] things are in the way of seeing okay check this [ __ ] out hopefully everyone out there knows how to play chess or has some rude or miss okay here's here are the rules of chess don't lose yeah there you go oh yeah boom castle sweet castle sweet animation too castle [ __ ] don't even get me started don't even get me started i'm gonna break down your castle with some [ __ ] artillery bro okay coming at you in the form of knights and bishops being taken by your puns boy i do not understand what you're talking about right now yeah well i'm trying to threaten you with non-threatening words that's what's happening it's pretty great what did you just do what did you do why did you do that this isn't doing [ __ ] this night's not doing [ __ ] for me right now how about this take care how about this place that it can't move to why oh no there it can move there it can [ __ ] whoa whoa oh yay that's wait oh my god oh i guess they're magnetized oh god oh boy whoa goodness whoa goodness gracious oh it's only two ways to rotate it it's this way please stop and this way gonna barf okay hold on let it let's like [ __ ] it a little bit so it's how's that wait that's that's worse yeah it's the best aaron and then you can't even tell what pieces they are from above aaron oh god please please stop i'm gonna throw up all right here you get a little action on your side now okay this is yeah this is pretty sweet you can totally see what the pieces are oh god now who [ __ ] decided this was a good way to play chess [ __ ] and now all the controls are upside down too what like moving up yes oh god rotate it back oh god in heaven were they thinking all right i i mean this virtual chess 64. i wish this playthrough was was existed in 1998 as a commercial for virtual chess 64. yeah and even then we'd be like what the [ __ ] is going on what is this what what did you just do what did you just do i protected myself so you can't get the [ __ ] fork on the queen and the rook with the knight well that's what i wanted well why didn't you take my needs into account man i'm bone zoned you're too good at chest man i can't do [ __ ] well you said it's your goal to beat me a chest by 2018. so this is did i say that yeah oh man why do i keep setting unrealistic goals for myself [ __ ] oh boy you know what i'm going to do i'm going to make some action satisfaction happen no i don't want no no play chess man but it's hard now i got to like think for like an hour no well let's get this party going are you are you dan are you getting the party going yeah yeah the party's going okay okay here's what's happening uh-huh here's what's oh my god this is like a super trade right now yeah it's it's it's night and then bish and then oh no just pawn yes and then night and then bish correct and then and then what and then nothing and then well and then a whole lot of jack sassy says that's my that's my new word for nothing jassy jacksepticeye jack sassy you guys brought jack sassy to the party that means i brought nothing so you think oh oh oh oh oh are we fighting are we fighting so you're fighting so you think oh my god bro so you think what the [ __ ] is this are you serious what is i what the hell it's a unicorn yeah cause you're white so you're the good one and i'm black so i'm like an evil battering ram thing oh man now i gotta kill a unicorn yeah it's like my least favorite thing to do in the world all right if you can make it yeah jeez oh [ __ ] oh god oh god please i'm not doing that that was the reason it's the game oh that's disgusting check this [ __ ] out taking your pawn you all ready for this i take your pawn now you're a tiny man insert yourselves into the lung of lungs of the poor my god this sucks how dare you how [ __ ] dare you um you piece of trash whoa alright garbage you you garbage disposal garbage human piece of human tray yeah that's what i want oh gosh oh god in heaven what am i an evil little what are these things what country was this made yeah i feel like that's like romanian lore or something yeah exactly it's like well the the green pixie elves oh krampus oh damn it i made the wrong decision yeah that's what i'm saying i did i did uh choice well well now that you say that now i'm like oh [ __ ] is there more opportunity for me than what i thought was open for me eat him eat him oh god you can't even see the action because the [ __ ] thing switches boy this is terrible oh that pawn how did it crash through the glass there's no glass here oh well glassy ass i don't know yeah seems that way maybe the board is made out of glass and it's just like stained glass oh look she's so heavy she killed the horse oh that's the queen that's the that's the evil queen oh my god really yeah so hot so hot so hot to trot dude i'm gonna threaten you [ __ ] what now [ __ ] what y'all gonna do um i'm gonna take it because it's an empty threat it's not backed up by anything oh snap there goes stop twirling the board there goes dead boy she just is it an empty threat is it oh that's your queen oh [ __ ] my queen stab yo queen [ __ ] oh my god you got dead queen [ __ ] oh my god wow i totally thought that was your king god damn it i castled my king god damn the graphics on this game oh so bad wow that's i'm really in trouble now oh geez i'm in horrible situations now what y'all gonna do [ __ ] not much your knight is gonna get [ __ ] nom nommed no i can stop that back that [ __ ] up but i mean i'm in terrible trouble back that ass up damn girl yo ass thick sorry i got a little you got a lot of hand there i'm sorry i can't uh address enough i've embarrassed myself well now what do i do i gotta take advantage of the situation the pressure's on the pressure's on like donkey kong donkey kind i'm just trying to donkey guy he's trying to make conversation kind of i threaten that rook at least yeah um oh oh i see how this is double jeopardy on my pawns you really breaking new ground there copernicus what the [ __ ] aaron what double jeopardy on my paw well you got a queen in there too so that's cool great i don't care you think you're so [ __ ] smart but you're not okay watch this ha i hope i didn't [ __ ] myself so i'm just trying to i'm just trying to make it happen captain captain what are you doing wha what is it that you're doing right now i don't know man what do you think i'm doing i i don't know what i think you're doing wow i will do this how about that i love it take it i will not take it why not please [Laughter] i'm begging you give me something from the cockles of my soul oh boy go ahead make some bread maybe that bishop will end up dead nice oh [ __ ] bowl yeah right that was a good move it was a very good move i'm gonna pat myself on the back of the neck there because in my culture my culture that's what you do okay your back you pat him on the back of the neck all right i think we're about halfway through this game want to do next time on game grumps and we'll make it a two-parter next time on fame grumps all right we'll finish this tomorrow and oh god what a [ __ ] show this has turned into i know right i love it we're both really good at chess yeah i don't know mama hey welcome back hello welcome oh it's my turn it is aaron's turn yet he was handing me the connection i thought i was you know an incredible move of sports i was just i was so confident about my move that i thought i already did it yeah how about that how about that cash me outside how about that i don't want to cash you outside cash me outside that's the million dollar line dude it did make her a million dollars i love i love the actual clip because i hate dr phil i love he's just [ __ ] she's like catch me outside how about that and he's like i'm sorry what did you say [Laughter] what was that i'm legitimately confused cash me outside what did you say and then the mom's like she's saying that she'll beat you up if you if you want to go outside and fight her oh the mom is there yeah yeah i guess she's only like 13. how would she have gotten take it take it [ __ ] i did why are you taking that pawn when i could take your pawn stop why are they doing this why is this a thing oh that's terrible i did it [Music] victory i was not that was a that was a real intense pawn yell just like ponyo the miyazaki film check this out watch this i fully expect the board to spin at least five times now i'm gonna eat you for dinner what is he doing he's tickling his feet oh with a knife and he's dead well that guy had a gun what are you plotting i'm sorry what'd you say i'm sorry what was that cash cash cash me out son what did you say i don't think you want to sacrifice your rook to kill a pawn so or is this what you wanted and there's some kind of [ __ ] secret society going on oh [Laughter] god dang it dang it but you're you're but it's gonna die my hook is gonna my [ __ ] you whoop my wreck all right stop it not to be confused with my bishop [ __ ] hopping in my tahoe whoa what was that don't make a [ __ ] noise yeah was that the battle horn yeah it was like don't even try it i'm [ __ ] dude i don't have pieces anymore yeah [ __ ] you have exactly the same amount of pieces that i do in fact peace for peace we are totally tied says you man now it's just time for bringing but now my pawn is dead right that's the idea but then you have more pieces now you said we have the exact same amount of pieces but logically we don't and why'd you use the bish because now you can take the rook that's exactly right you're answering your own questions whoa why are you so good at the chess maybe it's what are you doing chess club i was in chess club we talked about that yesterday well now you're going to take the bish fart on my tits [Laughter] sapping roger dude this is zapping roger oh color me bad [Laughter] i don't know i don't know i don't know no not there i can't go there there why there i don't know dan i'm in a panic i'm in a frenzy if you went one more underneath my rook then i can't do anything without trading and sacrificing yeah sure but now i can just take the rook i mean i'll lose the bishop but you always want to trade a bishop for a rook shut up okay you're right and you're right and when you're right you're right what the [ __ ] just happened there i'm just gonna [ __ ] take your stupid [ __ ] okay bish where'd it go it's gonna smash it oh it caught it inside it's digesting now oh i want to see the whole digestion process or it like breaks down he's like ah he's just melting converting him and then he like goes into the fetal position and just kind of dies yeah that's what i want to see too actually yeah like he just slow it's like real sad but like he's like it's real sad it just [ __ ] fades you can see the life draining from his eyes oh absolutely as it gets digested by a [ __ ] castle i think it's time to castle speaking of whips [ __ ] you man all right you're so [ __ ] smart with your castle tactics aaron you think you are how do you like that i'm apples how do you like them wait no i can't do that nope i don't want to hear your jazzy licks right now yeah there's like just a saxophone player waiting on the side like oh what do i do man what am i doing what do i do you tell me well first of all i lose i'm i'm totally [ __ ] you are not totally dead yeah man what am i to do i don't exactly i don't know either what do you think about that that you did a thing that's neither that's very middle of the road you gotta give me some feedback here that's very milk toast with a cube uh yes check this [ __ ] out i'd love to check this [ __ ] [ __ ] out how do you like that you're getting you're getting bone zoned bro you're [ __ ] blocked you're getting hard penis blocked from moving you tit wrangler i don't want to be a tit wrangler you flesh dangler whoa i definitely don't want to be that yeah you do oh man come on why do you want to steal my pawn come on i'm not stealing it you're going to you're baiting me to take that [ __ ] and then your rook's going to take it and then it's got free range of the well it doesn't because the king will take it but then they'll put me in check so you'll just get for free and then you'll pin my king and then you'll win i have never seen a more defeatist attitude in all my years of playing chess like i could say 16 moves down the line i am [ __ ] and there's nothing i can do to prevent it watch this action satisfaction oh boy you're still gonna do it though you're still gonna do it there's nothing i can do your rooks are positioned perfectly you're you're a tit grabber and a monster [ __ ] you're a monster [ __ ] how how am i oh my god what am i to do i'll go here my god that was funny but if i take the i could take your rook and then you won't have a rook to pin me with but i'd lose my rook and all i would have left is a useless ass chocolate bishop why is he chocolate because he's only on the brown pieces oh god gotcha i mean he's vanilla i'm gonna do it but he's got jungle fever i'm gonna do it baby all right let's see what happens i'm excited no i'm not so excited anymore [ __ ] castle versus castle boy i like that they made the castles oh boy why do they spin it on the point of impact i don't know so you can't see the action it's really dumb and ugly and that's my rook that's my rook everybody's saying that's my rook and zap them with your jews whip crack with a whip crack with his whoopee tail and the beast was done boy they really why does he shrink them yeah it just minimizes things just blow him up or something or make him like bleed out like ebola he oh god he's the good one like he's the one who doesn't want to hurt anybody no okay he's not hurting the rest of their lives by making them tiny wow and they go home to their lovers and they're like stay in love with me and they're like no can do well i'm still [ __ ] you're [ __ ] aaron well says you mr person who's not [ __ ] okay but then you'll just take that but oh wait no you won't you can't take that because then i'll take you so [ __ ] you yeah see well they're just like done with the [ __ ] seat they're like all right let's get this over with yeah you've seen this [ __ ] it whoa whoa whoa now you're an all-star and i can't move this pawn [ __ ] no wait wait wait maybe yes oh are you ready for the [ __ ] i knew you were i knew it see i knew it i knew you i know i know you i don't know if this game has on passe but i think they probably do yep oh you sick tit do you know what that is yes i know what on passe is okay cool jesus christ all right but explain it to the audience so they know hi my name is aaron i'm [ __ ] you might actually be a little bit [ __ ] at this point you think yeah oh dan do you think so starting to get there look at me i'm gonna try my absolute hardest to make something happen look at me i'm aaron 100 years erin and dan my shriek is in danger ah why the [ __ ] come on you piece of garbo you [ __ ] garbage you do you wanna do you wanna call it no all right call it aaron win all of your pieces are on are on vanilla yeah and i only have a chocolate bishop he's not chocolate he just has jungle fever like chess jungle fever so what am i to do now jungle fever i what move can i make i lose i resign the end you win dan wins okay dan realizes intelligence is more important and here we go with the checkmate [Music] black winds wow dang it boy that was really [ __ ] it was a little overwhelming honestly yeah with all the animation and the board spinning and the green underside they're really just gonna be like black wins they just killed a trumpet player and made him like blow his last breath black wins all right change that to danny we're good thank you bye bye thanks yo we're popping off over here off hello by playing the ultimate board game collection that's how we pop it's been five years that's unbelievable since we played checkers on this channel and i want to play it again at least five years numerically it was 2014. yeah it might have been like near the end of 2014 and this is whatever you get what i'm saying yeah rad tad sandy did you choose the aquatic background i didn't choose anything aside from that well there's a hammerhead shark underneath our checkerboard well i'm sorry man you just got to appreciate what nature provides i'm sorry for yelling at my voice all right get away from my hand get away from my hand unwanted unwanted unwanted i'm gonna grab the scuba come here scratching his back dude scratch this oh who's the new shark who's the shirt who's a good shot who's a good they don't have much of reaction nah yo check it i'm safe man forget it don't even get next to my johnson sorry sorry for yelling dude i'm blasting this game off yo i'm using some [ __ ] top tier strats are you that's a bad move is it yeah i can tell you because i'm a master of this game can you dude really not appreciating ear tude right now yeah yeah yeah wish you could dial it back um what did she say she's like please start again i hate that i know because it's like relevant to what's happening yeah and i'm like don't tell me how to play checkers dog please start again i don't like the way this round is going [Music] dude they should have played this at the super bowl dude instead instead of football it's a musical performance it would have been the same level of interesting i assure you what are you going to do now punk that's what you're going to do isn't that what you're going to do devil went down to texas jexus how did he get there he landed his jet ski wow jeff went down to dixon broke his food and broke his foot on the way there had to go see a podiatrist and you act like i don't care well [ __ ] bro do you see a move great nope scared pants [ __ ] moment here [Laughter] i can't tell you how many times i've [ __ ] my pants out of fear during a game of checkers oh hell yeah you gonna move that yes oh [ __ ] what you moved your piece i did it the devil went down to jerseys looking for a soul to steal that's right aaron but i don't like that was that a torpedo that just shot under suit well yeah they're trying to catch the man that's a bad way to catch a person look at him go he's [ __ ] flipping and flapping like nobody's business focus on the checkers like that thing what the heck well they're trying to find red october dude oh uh huh you okay father gotta listen to your heart listen to the beat listen to the rhythm rhythm of the street uh this is the heart of your beat oh listen up listen good listen up listen good i feel you joanna i feel you you sent me chocolate covered strawberries they tasted very good in my mouth the [ __ ] are you talking about i ate them and then i shipped them that's not what happened joanna aaron yeah it's not how it went down man how did it go down then why don't you educate me i ate the strawberries and they're sitting very comfortably in mr tums right now oh is that a is that a safe move or is that a surf move oh who's got the safe move [ __ ] oh [ __ ] looks like i get to move for free boy you did you did a nice job with that listen to my friend dan he's a cool boy he's a cool boy oh got my friend dan hanging out with me cuz he's cool yes living large in the style living go to the keep up the [ __ ] money in my pocket i'm a dangerous man with some money oh no i [ __ ] it up oh well that's game damn it i miss uh i i forgot what i was doing because i was thinking about chocolate covered strawberries because okay so if you moved that one there first then i'm just forfeiting this game at this point oh what the h yeah it's done holy [ __ ] i won game over okay as one word thank you for that game aaron yeah man really fun let's never play checkers again no but it's good it's a silly game no it's not a silly game it's a fun game it's kind of dumb you like it it's chess for idiots okay so i said it checkerheads listen [Music] you've been you've been seeing some things about me and my bridgeman no no to my own horn or anything but i think um i'm sorry yeah those were words so they may have been get some jumps off of your [ __ ] yeah i'm gonna be so hot gonna be so hot uh gonna go so far gonna go so far baby going so far i'm gonna go very hot [ __ ] i'm gonna listen to my mom cause she told me to go really far with everything i have in my life use things and my opportunities that in front of me opportunity trinity opportunity these things are gonna die like everybody's gonna crash all these planes are gonna crash you thought i could make it all the way to the end well you were wrong you were mistaken look at all these little these little boots mama you've got a lot of moves over here you got a lot to learn mom [Laughter] listen mother if you think that's how it's gonna be oh my god if you think kingdom hearts 3 is an easy game to understand you've got another thing coming missy mom missy mom that's right i called you out what are you going to do about a mother you're going to send me back this camp scamp scamp skip scale did you just [ __ ] block me yeah you're an ass i see blocked you oh baby what the [ __ ] that's a tad sandy right there that's the tattiest of the sandies bro why what i just exploded into the lead because my sandies were so tatted [ __ ] no no oh getting set sad tandy's over here getting sad tandy yeah oh that's like that's a c block wall right there you seeing that [ __ ] oh can i make a c block wall just for you what a gift i treasure everything about who you always loved are [Laughter] what if you talked like a like a blubbering drunk person all the time i just wanted you to know that i could probably meet you for lunch and you've always been such a friend oh [ __ ] look at this yeah look at that whoa oh that big actually [Music] you mean so much to me would you like to save five percent by signing up for a target red card wow hmm you would mean the [ __ ] world jeepers who's gonna get a kiss you or me yes move that one yes please yes do it do it i can't move that [ __ ] piece [ __ ] i can't do it i don't like that i don't like that no i know you son of a [ __ ] you're arrogant wait yeah we have a starfish of confusion happening right now let me clear it up for you buster i just made it easier for you to make a point did you point i rewatched that recently and that [ __ ] how do you not understand me did you point it made no [ __ ] sense life's waited to begin no oh no that no that was a mistake that's [ __ ] that's not what i meant to do chronicles of ridiculous [ __ ] boy you you so goddamn lucky in these games oh i'm playing with pure skill and a little bit of luck and mostly luck i'm playing with all luck oh [ __ ] listen to me baby i want you to understand something that this is how we gonna play now this is how we gonna play this is how we gonna play now play now listen i want you to hear something this is how we gonna play this is how we go play play play oh the beat stopped oh you [ __ ] messed up my sneeze stranded you my style and ease damn it oh that's where all my ease comes from don't do it don't do what no uh um riding on the back of your [ __ ] [ __ ] gonna eat stuff like a grasshole grasshole that's not don't move it i have to dan oh you [ __ ] ass i could have gotten all the way to the end if you didn't move that stupid piece you're such a [ __ ] cool bro and i love you he's a cool grandma he's a cool grandma he said he's a cool guy at home cool grandma you're a cool grandma he's a cool grandma she's a cool grandma my grandma doesn't know what i do for a living good oh what now s i don't know slurving it up like this oh you nasty nasty boy oh you're a nasty boy aren't you oh you're trying to see block more than you're trying to move well yeah for sure because one is better than not here not here anywhere about here that's not what i meant to get in those sick points [Music] this is the sound you will hear before i pull the trigger pull the trigger dramatic dramatic [Music] names pete so much bouncing this game's over [Laughter] i've got cholera oops time to go to the bathroom again chickens are horrifying yeah they're pretty dangerous oh i didn't mean to do that oh welcome to my life shut the [ __ ] up siri [ __ ] you stupid [ __ ] beta yeah this is not going well at all not going well at all what the [ __ ] give me more points you have a million points oh i'm sorry dan are you [ __ ] jealous not really i gotta be honest with you i'm not super jealous taking this one pretty well although don't think i'm gonna win this why not i don't know could you [ __ ] off and go on like a little trip with that one oh wait oh can i do this is that oh my god you can do that that is so uncool wait a second eat my condoms [ __ ] off you gonna see block me that's cool i'll just [ __ ] i'll just get in there somehow oh right in the center that's cool sucks for you baby not really it does though does it sure no you gotta move around i'm just gonna [ __ ] i'm just gonna have fun in here but if i can't get out then that's what i'm saying what are you gonna do i don't know i guess that'll be a draw oh i love the way i can't believe this is a thing you can do everybody loves the way that you tickle your balls now tickle those balls the way that you tickle your balls [Laughter] [Laughter] yeah such an ass this is the best [Music] now what what are you gonna do what are you what are you gonna do i can't get out of there you're gonna [ __ ] stalemate this all the way to the end oh man i can't get out bam bam let's see here this is [ __ ] funny you have more points than i do right now oh yeah cause you're you haven't been playing well this [ __ ] sucks dick go ahead move it see if i give a [ __ ] no not that one god damn it it really isn't like the best yeah it's very come on now no not that one my god just get out of there just [ __ ] just let me win i earned this ernda yeah you think you're gonna [ __ ] sneak one by me that's so great [ __ ] so great can i uh listen up listen up [ __ ] here we go now oh baby baby baby come on give me lots of chocolate give me lots of chocolate giving him the chocolate now chocolate covered hummus and chocolate covered hummus come on chocolate covered homeless hummus oh don't cover the homeless oh yeah you better be careful son i could win this boom two yeah you're 100 right you gotta be kidding me oh yeah wow what a [ __ ] move by me there's gotta be a way out of this [ __ ] [ __ ] i don't like this i don't like it at all dan it's delicious dana you don't understand i don't like this anymore [Laughter] well i'm trying to figure it out all right there's got to be a way but i don't know if there's a way i don't think there is i don't know if there's a way you could try to jump flip over me but i'll just chop off your legs and then i'll have to put you in a mechanical suit and you'll be like no no it's over that's [ __ ] ridiculous it's amazing it's what it is it's not it's not give some credit to your boy dan come on you won the word find in the checkers what dude i know it's [ __ ] brilliant all right like i'm not revel in this moment dan for i am stumped i'll i'll revel once it's over well then china's checking for half an hour now it's going to be a way it's got to be a way there ain't no way there you know there ain't no way there ain't no way i hate this i hate this i hate that you won yeah i hate that you outsmarted me i didn't outsmart you you did 100 outsmarted me only in this one instance certainly not in the game of life dan don't even [ __ ] start that [ __ ] with me look how close it was it wasn't close before but then you made it close that's the whole point what a [ __ ] technicality [Music] wow you're [ __ ] kidding me yeah are you [ __ ] kidding me danny wins that [ __ ] sucked what the [ __ ] dan thank you for watching the last episode of game grumps because i am about to get fired oh that was fun are you kidding me that's like promotion worthy this guy i like this kid's moxie yeah it's like you wanna head up my rocket department jesus christ game grumps spacex remember never give up never surrender never surrender no retreat and i mean if you can try to do don't cheat but do something that looks like cheating and exploit that bye do something that looks like it did so true it looked like cheating i threaten i mirror and you protect you attack but i also protect what the [ __ ] dude let me grab it okay jeepers creepers you can do any number of moves the second horse it's called a knight we're off to a weird start it's a horse dude what do you mean a knight you can't knight a horse i know i know what a horse is and you and you treating and i [ __ ] um oh i don't know what to do now oh i'm such a scared boy don't be scared well i am it's scurry i'm gonna ding dongle ding dong ding dong ding ding ding don't threaten my damn girl don't threaten my damn king dog well i'm so bad at this oh i can't even you're doing fine no i'm not you just have to not psych yourself out would you just shut up for a second i'm i'm in the process of psyching myself out i'm gonna kiss you oh i'm gonna kiss you yeah here it comes i'm gonna kiss you no aaron don't kiss me i'm going was that a bad you're trying to kiss me right now oh he's been a kisser straight up kissing you are going for it yeah i told you i do appreciate that i don't want anybody to [ __ ] dick around you're when you're wearing your [ __ ] pillow oh that that's that's what's happening you're the pillow boy well when i said when i sit on the pillow the pillow curls up to the edges because my butt is doing all the displacement my butt is displacing like whoa like yowza and my dad is like i love you and i'm like i know i know dad my dad kisses me can i start here [Music] i'm sure i've made this comment before but it is dangerous to have this many planes swirling around each other in the sky whoa whoa not what i wanted to grab queen queenie with a peony please i forgot the queen can do that i super forgot the queen could do that gonna kill gonna kill god um [Laughter] oh [Music] so nice oh [ __ ] chick so is so nice no yes yeah boy move that horse oh you're gonna [ __ ] double jeopardy dog double jeopardy you yeah you're gonna double check for me my secret plan all along you're gonna double jeopard me how [ __ ] dare you but you said [ __ ] i did don't take my thing i'm going to take your thing [Laughter] thinking about taking this thing is getting taken gonna take the third gonna take the thing the thing is taken now do you see a secret move do you see a sneaky move that's a good move sneaky sneaky move now the movie's sneaky yeah dude you're getting sneaky over here the movie sneaky snacky sneaky don't [ __ ] get me don't do it don't do well oh i know you're gonna do it you know i had to do it don't you do it there should be like a one finger option you know where you can like keep one finger on it and be like um i think i'm gonna move no i didn't take my finger off i didn't take my finger off can move it [Music] how are you winning did you did you just move that you [ __ ] you christmas tree i'm a nutty christmas tree i'm a nutty christmas draper because this is my favorite sport christmas is my favorite sport why don't you why don't you ever talk to me during aaron you must make a move we are doing a game show i know how to [ __ ] do a show i just want to figure it out i want to make sure i know what to do i'm going to freaking go what are you going to do trade queens oh no not my queen oh baby [ __ ] but i love you but i love you my dad no but that's my thing my dad my dad my nasty naughty dad no i don't know what let's give this my dad's my dad's my dad is a cool girl guy can't confirm i invested in tesla and overall it was a positive oh well that's good it got me scared a couple times cause elon musk was like i'm gonna do part that was really cool now moving in on your dad i don't wanna move my dad now don't wanna move your dad now don't wanna move your dead dead it was underneath the water that's what i was thinking of underneath the water oh yeah i don't want to lose my rook but you definitely don't want to lose your rook the rook is the second most important piece next to the queen dude that's what you say it is but you don't feel it or mean it i do well [Music] i wanna have a good time with my friend daniel now i'm gonna move move my heck and rock gotta move that hacking rook away now but i don't know where to put it i don't know where to put it literally only two squares you can move it no it's not that's not true yes it is there's one and there's two two and three do you see three yeah okay i can move it here oh right you can yes i can move it here or here it is three and i was thinking of moving it here so for the love of christ you gotta pick one dude just [ __ ] dry up all right i know i don't have time to dry up dude i'm doing my hecking best here to be an [ __ ] and i don't preach i knew it i freaking knew it i freaking knew it uh i freaking knew it together with your hands save me i'm not super good at chess save me my dad sips drinks wow sunday dad sips drinks on a sunday stop threatening my [ __ ] rook you dope sips drinks stop it you're such a [ __ ] you are so you know what i mean totally [Laughter] how about [ __ ] this how about [ __ ] this how about you take that [ __ ] must sir you think you're so smart moving your horse of course [Laughter] well a horse is a horse of course of course please don't touch my hair don't [ __ ] threaten it when i threaten you okay so cool i think it's so chill so fresh it's almost like it's like you want to take one of my pieces but you freaking can't okay you can't spoon man spoon man come together with your hands save me oh boy what are you going to do man i don't [ __ ] know man this is you gotta do something i know something is what you gotta do i know listen i wanna do a bunch of stuff come on ah i wanna do a bunch of stuff come on everybody wants to do some stuff come on i'm going to do lots of stuff come on do the stuff aaron do the stuff aaron do the stuff listen stuff i want to do the stuff aaron do the stuff i want to do all the stuff you see but i can't do the stuff unless you work for me come on can i start again you started work what please start over [Music] sorry please yeah i'll just play it out [ __ ] it okay well no maybe why don't you quadruple guess yourself is amazing can i start thinking again it's like your brain telling you what to do with your thought processes let's just that you have to take but you can't take so you have to move but you can't [ __ ] it i'm just gonna go for it okay check [Music] [Music] yes you made a terrible decision yes i did oh the shop always with the shot the [ __ ] shop dude yeah the the trade-ups you got to make sure you're getting the best of those i didn't even why didn't i even think of the shop i don't know i thought it was like a pond boy i'm [ __ ] now tommy likey i need to go to the doctor dummy one wingy you gotta go aaron or you're not gonna make your five o'clock appointment oh no that's a pawn tis oh [Laughter] shut up hey what are you doing i know i was trying sorry gosh no i don't know what to do at this point you just gotta do something i know i gotta do something but i don't know what to do [Music] [Laughter] [ __ ] oh not a fan oh my god [Music] that's the only thing you can do now looks like you took my [ __ ] now now i'm gonna take your pawn now and you're gonna take my partner no nobody's taking the pawn now it looks like i was wrong about that [Music] oh [ __ ] here he comes [Music] [Laughter] in with my king what possible i don't know damn okay i'm sorry i can't move my kang take it go on take it here comes the king now it's time to die the king is gonna die now i'm gonna die the king is a friendly guy good game aaron you're a win boy you're you're a you're a clever man hey i got one good move on you you did that you felt good you did all right next time on game grubs i'm gonna give dan a kiss that's uh you can hold me to that that's the most dangerous game of all you can't see that i am farting hey welcome to cape crew hello hi okay we're gonna play some checkers uh yeah we're gonna play some checkers this is actually one of our more popular episodes way back in the day and we haven't revisited it in a while so we're we're gonna do it man we're gonna we're gonna flip and donk it aaron and i were discussing this earlier first given the uh the way the backstreet boys tour is going and uh my state of mind right now i feel like checkers is exactly the level of complicatedness my brain can handle yeah before it involuntarily shuts down yeah i think so too yeah but now you know it's going to get like super intense there's three moves there's three moves all right dan is grumpo and i'm aaron just fyi i don't know if that was unclear are you trying to hop yourself i don't know was your first move to cheat at checkers please i'm you are a monster i'm in show mode now i'm not in think mode so give me a heck and bronk um yeah what are you gonna do there's an unp impenetrable wall in front of you bro yeah it's pretty good aaron is in control how exciting i'm always gonna be in control dude you have no clue that that test game that we did before this was that was me on a bad day [Laughter] it's me on a better day how do you like that a little blocky i love it a little supernatural blockage i am more supernatural supernatural blockage is like what i have after i eat uh del taco supernatural blockage sounds like a sound garden song yeah ugh i hate checkers i'm just not i'm not great at it well we got to do chinese checkers after this which is which is that's german game yeah i love that look at all this progress i've made i'm infiltrating your side of the bird but then my pieces are gonna swallow you we'll just we'll just see about that mr cat [ __ ] sorry i i'm sorry how about this oh oh my god damn that was amazing [Laughter] can someone do one of those really like blown out audio 360 gamer moments [Music] wtf oh man look at this we're just shifting the board around not even playing games oh no then you'll just move there oh god king my johnson i do hate it put a tiny crown upon it hello yeah now what you scandalous hooker dude i'm sorry i i just i got excited i don't know where that came from checkers got my blood up my pressure's high i've got the sugar how about a little bit of this [Applause] [Laughter] i'm all right okay so doing all right that was critical mistake number three no we're as far as the game pieces go we're we're basically even what was right but it's about to all go to s king me oh king me if you don't [ __ ] king me either my only piece up there all the other ones are hiding back in my fort like a like a scaredy boy scared scared boy like a scared boy boy who is scared why can't you i can't do jack dude the first person to get a king is just like god and checkers oh i see do you see my game yeah but you'll be naughty you'll be trapped in the corner yeah i mean i can't win so just go with your incredible four directional powers stop slurping you slurpee sorry i just can't help but slurp i'm a boring slurper that's a that's a that was a sick nasty move i'm going to say that right now that was a sick nasty move oh well thank you very much aaron pretty sick and nasty oh yours is upside down no i'm the one who has yours is upside down yours is upside down oh you know what we might it might be showing us different versions of the board based on our own perspective oh you think i do because yours is clearly upside down on my on my pad i don't know on my page it's just a race for another king it sure is help [Laughter] i've got two kings that means i've got two kingdoms shut up [Laughter] oh god what do i do oh there's nothing i could do right now just create some congestion this is just a savage awful moment in my life it's cool the perfect defense oh my god at least damage yeah seriously twinkly ass this is a fun game between friends man this eats dick all right let's just get it over with i can't oh man all right you'll never take me alive [ __ ] okay thank god whoa oh woof good times too bad yeah no i mean hey that was that wasn't so bad no no i made it interesting you want to go one more round of checkers yeah yeah yeah i feel like there's a lot learned in that in that round and this time things will get can i maybe go first this time uh yeah player two neat thank you it's very plucky music yeah just like some guy like testing out the keys like this one different this one how about this one this one this one he's gonna make himself all congested i played checkers against you too much and now i see disaster at every turn well well [ __ ] what y'all doing y'all playing checkers back up my checkers game go ahead and take my red i don't care it don't matter none [Laughter] it kind of matter a little bit turns out it matters oh [ __ ] well [ __ ] oh boy it's gotta be one of my favorite videos of all time what y'all doing me likey check this move out yeah that's a yeah see where i'm going let's go see what i'm going with that's a good one all right and there's nothing you can do but taste my jism as it flies towards you hey was that jism flying towards me this guy it's a lot of pork all right [Laughter] i could be wrong but was that chisholm is that barbacoa wow pineapples tarragon hmm yellow jism must be turmeric ugh that was quite disgusting yeah well no problem happy to help oh nice look at my army i see what you're [ __ ] doing hmm it's very naughty well [ __ ] oh oops oh my friend you have made a critical error i mean it's not that critical yeah you've left your butthole wide open how sad for you blinky blinky blink clinky plunky i'm just dying in anticipation i'm doing this i can't take this any longer i gotta i gotta do this it's not spectacular but i gotta do it dude what did you oh i see well all right now we're getting this game going now we're cooking with ass maybe because it was funny aaron maybe you could just compliment your friend once in a while um here you're like the deep blue computer of checkers here [Music] of winning is oh yeah no yeah oh [ __ ] [Laughter] oh no oh oh darn [Laughter] oh geez oh geez man cadbury cream eggs i'm really in for it now oh reese's peanut butter cups reese's peanut butter cup hmm what a delight soon you shall know the taste of my pants plink plunk plunk blinky block splinky blah black plinky plonk oh okay that's what i call a double threat [ __ ] well [ __ ] what y'all doing um it's so tasty [Laughter] oh god at last you shall taste the taste of my sputum [Laughter] sputum okay you do that and then i do that and then you move down and then i move up and then you move that way checkers is like slapping it's like two guys like fighting with chopsticks and then someone like gets king and they get like a gun and the other one's like oh oh my god i thought we were playing with chapsticks oh i didn't see that move oh boy well that was stupid it's brutal well you know checkers just ain't what they used to be [Laughter] gonna put the worm gotta put the worm [Music] okay a second about the fisherman show like oh yeah fishing the editor had to walk watch through all the footage that wasn't interesting enough [Music] no it's just when you put this when you put the worm well [ __ ] all right fine i'll just do what you did and just [ __ ] i know call it i know i know the feeling that's a game over wow that's it yeah i don't have any more moves okay that's one one so we gotta do a tiebreaker uh how do we decide who goes first which determines the winner um i never get to win my favorite i'm gonna try new techniques flagrant disregard new techniques oh look at you developing new tech sneaks [Music] [Laughter] new techniques i just think they're neat choose your move wisely aaron for the fate of your reputation depends on it choose your move wisely or else your butt muscles will never unclench [Music] what if i own the sides i don't know what if you want i don't know either he's infiltrated the sides damn it how on earth are we going to advance if there's no size oops [Laughter] do it you spindly [ __ ] okay oh [ __ ] all right mistakes were made well you've recovered because i was so obsessed with the damn sides although um perhaps there is a way out of this after all no i was like wait what you give me two options here yeah i um i don't know what the [ __ ] i was thinking there i just took it for granted that something else would happen but it did not well [ __ ] what y'all doing the game grumps look at me daddy i'm spinning look at me twirl oh boy now we're in real danger danger will robbieson you are a significant [ __ ] bro i know your moves from last game so i'm feeling very empowered right now you know my moves my specific checker movie yes you had moves where you took advantage of my thing but now i have a formation that looks like samus's spaceship so i don't want to hear it that's true this is impenetrable this fortress all right something's gonna get [Laughter] all right so anyway i'm gonna make this penetrable absolute berry of dingles i've never known somebody to dangle this many berries and yet here we are dangling as is our wand as our berries must we're easy now geez now whoa aaron that was incredible thanks bro anyway i lose i mean what the [ __ ] that's it that's totally it oh man uh well do your worst mister there's the gun oh oh my god what am i gonna do with these chopsticks now block the bullet holy [ __ ] and that's game well look at you you can't do s jack about it alright then i guess we'll just get a second king then oh no king me i love it uh oh my god control aaron yeah ain't that the triggity truth i'm coming for you oh baby i'll come for you i'm coming for you well well i see it here's a here's another king for you dude thank you so much please god just end it [Music] merciful heavens wow that one move was that was the deal sealer that was sprinkly that was very i felt i felt the soft rain of your gizm upon my forehead [Laughter] what's that what's that like warm but not too warm like viscous fluid [Laughter] all right it's like you know when you leave a milkshake in the sun for like a little too long [Laughter] anyway thank you for joining us yeah this has been fun we have not played this in years no uh the last time we played it was um i believe there were airplanes flying under the board while a voice was like prepare to qualify for some random weirdness i mean that's from pole position but it definitely said something strange that's our record oh wow look at that oh including our practice game of checkers which it still counts for you which is so great thank you yeah you're no problem oh super jump do you like the super jumps here's where the fun begins damn it's just like yeah green oh you [ __ ] did you just did you just curse at me yeah did you just say the f word i can't believe you did you just say the friend word trying to gum up the works but i think i just gummed up the damn works yeah they're getting gummed gum it [Music] bouncing here and there occasionally twerks i don't know if you know this aaron the magic and mystery it's part of my history along with the secret of gummi berry juice oh man i can't imagine what you did all through the forest i sang out in chorus fighting for what's right and whatever i do god that theme song is amazing i mean like who was it like kenny loggins like it's so catchy kenny logan yeah he's like the king of ketchy he is pretty good he's saying danger zone didn't he from the top guys he wrote danger zone oh my god lots of hoppies many harpies and i am paying zero zero mind to ron weasley over there ronald weasley how tittylicious and then i'm gonna use it when i see you jump i'm gonna jump over dear peace you know wherever you want man i know dude it's like so exciting everybody takes you to china it's a globe it's true eventually you'll get to china if you pick a direction and commit it's very big it's very big actually are you gonna tell me china's not actually big because you'd be mistaken sir it's massive no i'm just thinking no actually it's the opposite what's that you won't because it's a globe the very nature of a globe no directions would take you to china except for the one that takes you to china or the opposite that takes you around the other way to china i'm gonna be 100 honest with you yeah i don't understand and i stopped paying attention it's a real double whammy [Laughter] i think i think it's just you have to pick one like two directions and those will take you to china if you go straight and then all the other ways will take you away from china well i guess i guess i'm assuming china is like a tiny one degree point on the earth it's a huge country that's what i just said [Music] i don't know why in my brain i was like china is one tiny point not a gigantic country with people and heritage yeah the street of china i like when you get screwed it makes me horny you're sorry i'm going to try not to use that voice ever again i'm in good shape as long as i don't blow it i was just as we know well within the realm of possibility he's thinking about china this whole time damn it oh yeah blocked me he actually blocked me you [ __ ] god damn you ronald weasley why would you do that if i can aaron hansen for a second you're a real piece of [ __ ] you know what you're a real [ __ ] [ __ ] okay you're a real piece of work there ronald oh my arm is all messed up what your arm is yeah from being so cool all day definitely not from jacking off i probably threw it out for being so cool oh my god frick and a half frickin a half you're so close and i'm so far and in the end it doesn't even matter it really doesn't well you did not get one into his section yeah what a what a piece of garbo looks like he didn't pay attention to wizarding school huzzah good for you you [ __ ] cheater he cheated everyone saw it wow we're doing this again and this time the cpu is gonna be on extra hard no why because normal is good i don't i can't even change it do i have to unlock like not normal oh thank god see who really the commoners duke it out once the king has been crowned versus the worst second of the best dude third is the one with the hairy hairy chest [Music] looks like you sir have been owned it would appear that fourth is the one with the shiny hiney so i get the one from the back in the front that's what you do that is the move that's the move that i was about to do here i do it right now good one aaron you really are the comedy king [Laughter] look at all these moves no your moves are so sly so slick and so dry wait how do your moves are moves are weak oh check what the ass oh get out of my triangle i don't like this i don't like this oh no i don't like you're right i'm trying man oh you blocked me you stupid green bastard i know he's he's really snaked up a lot of s there you're gonna win again dude you're [ __ ] master at this how are you so good i don't think so because i've gotta get this going well then i will use my advantage of no advantage to get up here you suddenly went morgan freeman there but like the least morgan freeman thing that's ever been said then i will use my advantage of no advantage [Laughter] hope is a dangerous thing you know andy you can't keep hoping and wishing that things are going to happen for you they just they just won't just won't happen put them bows in your face golden nuggets oh you're not gonna use me to hop over your [ __ ] okay i mean all right i'll hop over oh no now it made it better for you wow yeah i gave you access to the [ __ ] [ __ ] atlanta airport right there like jesus yeah that's a hub airport that's exactly what it is yeah you're really gumming up the works over there yeah it's it's coming a little bit oh oh oh oh excuse me sir what an adventure wow yeah move that one yeah move that one do it move it all right easy now move that one i need it man i needed it [Laughter] dude could've used it oh boy this is a snuggle fest right here dude i'm really feeling the warmth from everybody you find on craigslist like i'm a professional snuggler oh i would not call that person to my house oh i'm liking what this is putting down i'm smelling what this game is stepping at daddy's got some new orders [Laughter] it's like the lead i love the idea of like just blowing sexy talk oh my love looks like daddy just gotta lose your train of thoughts looks like daddy forgot to and that's so daddy damn girl did you just get in [Music] then oh my god so funny um why don't you just stay down there and let them [Laughter] that's the other really funny one where like the guys just like way too nervous to pull off sexy time hey baby [Music] oh did you make i mean here is me i peed oh okay why don't you get the lube and i'll get the pancakes that's right god i'm dying over here [Music] [Laughter] oh man that is funny this this is working exactly how i wanted to go today was hilarious said my mom oh thanks you mean the power hour or just today in general oh it's going to be close it's going to be a close one a close bunch did you do give me your judy on a friday night give it to me on a friday night [Music] i've got it in three i've got it in three hurry for you and me i've got it at three why don't you wear the thing that daddy looks like hey baby you're looking real hot today oh oh that burrito is not sitting [Laughter] she's like what does daddy want me to do and i'm just like i guess she's gone for mild sauce daddy really wants pancakes pancakes something to soak up the acidic juices you made a good effort you're pretty close i just like to call attention to computer and their it's like they've never been to china or germany where this game was created what are we doing for four minutes um maybe you could play something that daddy did you know was daddy is just [ __ ] chess is a game that aaron and i have been playing for years aaron you have uh yet to beat me but it's correct i know it's coming because every time you get like a little bit closer and uh i feel my grip on myself worth slipping cool let's do it i'd love to i i hate this game uh with a fiery passion you are okay daniel you are pretty good no i mean you're amazing that's why i hate this game not amazing by any stretch there's there are certain chess players who can actually predict moves you know 20 30 moves in advance because their brains are just computers that can think of all the permutations forget that [ __ ] at all forget that [ __ ] i'm not interested i play rock and roll chess the woman with the fast cars and hard guitars well now you're a rock star get your game on oh god there's too much to think about this isn't checkers level this is this is checkers times a thousand god we've played so much chess throughout the years on game grumps we played like battle chess and that weird 3d chest that was made by like a strange scandinavian company and you could flip the board upside down for no reason do you remember that no oh boy we've had some strange times do i threaten the horse to move it's called back up [ __ ] wow [Laughter] your reactions are probably my favorite part of playing chess man whoever designed the chess can suck my dick dude it's i mean it's a brilliant game oh why hello there [Laughter] come on you are a very naughty boy [Music] you've given me naughty feelings [Music] in my lava side your larboard side yeah yeah that's where the naughty feeling is things are getting interesting now we're [ __ ] talking we're [ __ ] with gas don't ever [ __ ] with gas though that's dangerous go ahead huge nut mick johnson not giving not gaining jack [ __ ] i don't like it it means a free horrors well i've got to take him but i don't know the best way to do it and it's a night aaron the the first if you want to be taken seriously as a chess player that's probably the first thing you're gonna have to do it's a [ __ ] horse dude they never make it a dude on a horse it's always just a horse it's a [ __ ] horse it always the hor did the horse get knighted you have shown your bravery in battle sir ignite thee sir muffins of tinkleberries oh tangy diarrhea that's not an appropriate thing to say in this although i do like the idea of you being in like a high-stakes chess tournament and and you're just like just spouting that kind of stuff and they're like calling over judges can you get him to stop talking about tanki diarrhea please no i don't want to resign the [ __ ] am i gonna do there's nothing i can do right now jeez i'm like totally stuck you trying to intimidate my guy into moving you and you get out of here you took my [ __ ] bishop you son of a [ __ ] yeah that's what i did how [ __ ] could you i was gonna use it to win the game now what is a man to do pro chess guy in the in the comments here oh there's a lot of pro pro chess guy will call attention to how not great of a chess player i am well you see dan put his pawn on g7 and then he sunk his battleship that's not how this works well you say that potato potato i don't understand you're saying words to me you've been doing it saying words i don't know how i don't know if i love the words he's saying those words listen listen try this is that a [ __ ] threat what is it what is it what is this move what is this move that you've done for me what is this move i don't understand it what is happening i don't i don't get this is this like on passe what the [ __ ] is this you can on passe if you want boy i freaking hate this why do we play these games with each other because they're fun and we have fun together like friends do boy i should don't have fun with these chess was your idea what it was your idea it was my idea it was my idea now that i said that it was definitely my idea wait a second you [ __ ] face man i don't i don't wanna like i don't wanna all right then don't [ __ ] baby no i don't know what to do [Laughter] oh jeepers creepers now what what are you gonna do now i see your game i've backed up my other pawns you maverick renegade i don't [ __ ] around i don't know what to do i don't know what to do me neither everything's so freaking dangerous yeah it's we we do have uh some issues going on here do you have an issue here's a tissue cry baby i mean you're all jacked up over there with your freaking horse and bishop that you stole from me oh my god all right all right uh what what is this what is this you creep jeez louise jeepers creepers i hate moving the king i hate it because i factor everything into the king's movement of where he is and then i just have to think about the board in a new completely new way yeah it's scary you gotta want it you gotta wanna knead it hey little thing let me light your chemicals mama i'm sure hard to handle now mess around now you're in control grumpy being sure it ain't all it's cracked up to be the good boy i wish i could dunk like the greats like oh boy okay yeah god damn it i was thinking of using my queen many people ask who's the best sailor scout but they are all queens well i don't much care for this [Laughter] well this is a hot nasty cuddle wobble god damn it that [ __ ] rook is bunking up all my skus it's bunking my skus i'm having fun dan i know i can tell really good i don't even even have to be in the same house as you to know that you're having a great time right now don't don't bunk my sk i [ __ ] i knew that was gonna happen i [ __ ] i i thought of it and then i forgot about it i was like oh i should i should do something about no i guess not [ __ ] idiot god everything's fine [Laughter] oh man [ __ ] we're having fun baby we're having good times such a [ __ ] move who may no no me i i literally was like oh he's gonna cap that i should do something about it and then i just like just thought about some other [ __ ] you go you you fluctuate wildly between like yawning in resignation and abject blind fury that's fascinating to witness yeah that's my boy aaron [ __ ] sh what do i do in these dire circumstances [Music] in these difficult times i can feel it bubbling [Music] ah what are you gonna do if we go there we get it so you're not in the situation you're backed up you're never backed up you don't [ __ ] you just get backed up you go there you picked up and then if i go there then that is a problem for only me tick tick [ __ ] people are watching this i know man it's so scary there's like a move that's like ooh but i can't do it now what that was like the worst move you could have done what do you mean what did you have what do you have on me oh son of a [ __ ] [ __ ] god damn it i wasn't thinking about that i was just thinking about other [ __ ] this is what you do to me when we play [ __ ] chess you [ __ ] make me forget things that are supposed to not get forgot [Laughter] dude i know i know you're yelling at me but every time you clip the microphone it drops out so all i'm hearing is [ __ ] bit you always yeah what the hell now you [ __ ] i don't know uh did i do another really bad move did i do a bat dude i'm screwed bro you are in a bit of trouble i'm in super trouble like what the [ __ ] is even the point of this [ __ ] anymore [ __ ] still waste of my ass i got such a nice one too yeah it's it's it's it's like a it's like an apple that's why you have those apple bottom jeans oh where else am i gonna get boots with with the fur i don't know maybe you should hit the flow and then let me know i can't even with this night this night is just it's just just just [ __ ] eviscerated he's fine he's covered by the bishop i know he's covered by the bishop but i want to move him all right i didn't catch any of that but that's fine i said i i know he's covered by the bishop but i want to move him you little sacred heart i don't know what that means i don't either dude i just wanna [ __ ] die and i just wanna [ __ ] prevent you from winning and i just wanna [ __ ] die by playing video games [Music] yeah is it though it is what do you see to that [ __ ] oh boy [Laughter] i hate chess why do we play it i don't know dude you were all excited to play it no i wasn't every move is a bad one god damn it no man all it takes is the one thing it's just the one thing and then [ __ ] it oh is that what you wanted to do it's so funny jesus christ the hell's the point of any of it [Laughter] [ __ ] holy [ __ ] she's a [ __ ] waste there's nothing i can do at this point there's [ __ ] nothing what am i supposed to do there it protected my thing no i wonder what would happen if i just stopped doing commentary at all and just let you do the whole episode oh but it's right here it even says and it doesn't but it's all right [Music] i'm losing blood like the blood in my head like like in real life like like [ __ ] this like [ __ ] this [ __ ] this position this sucks i can't think that way i just can't like i can't think that far ahead and then suddenly it's like oh okay well every move you do is you lose everything so [Laughter] yeah chess is brutal man congratulations you [ __ ] idiot you didn't know anything about this game you stupid bastard that's a good move whatever shut up shut up [ __ ] you i know your [ __ ] horse is coming in i gotta do [ __ ] trigonometry to figure that [ __ ] out god damn it what the hell is the point of any of this i can't move anything this feels like one of those [ __ ] when you like like do a chess app on your phone and it's like here's some exercises for you win in two moves like this is what this feels like yeah take my [ __ ] horse see if i give a [ __ ] so yeah what [ __ ] what you take that sucker oh [ __ ] i aaron is in control oh really am i that's what it says on my thing what are you doing right now i'm resigning okay cool good game aaron wow that was a great game i loved it yeah we had so much fun you and me both at the same time equal numb levels of fun hey everybody uh so aaron and i have um a little score to settle in a french game where you capture by jumping it's checkers yes checkers always gets heated between us and uh well wanted a rematch our nine-year friendship is teetering on the edge and i think checkers is just the right thing to tip the scales right into i'm never speaking to you again do you think there's anyone out there who bets on game grumps versus games oh my god i love that can everyone just like do that on this one like what if ten thousand dollars was riding on a game of checkers that frankly you and i are terrible at we're not i guess you can't be really terrible at checkers but like you can be pretty bad yeah i mean we don't make like dumb moves we just make like kind of stupid moves well you just ensure that there will be a compilation of aaron and dan do extremely stupid checker moves hmm yes seems as though i've forced the issue seems as though you have forced the issue consider my issue forced the issue has been forced you're being so [ __ ] toxic right now [Laughter] wow how incredibly 20 20 of you to say so looks like i have forced the issue [Laughter] please don't please don't do anything that will sacrifice my pieces please don't do anything we'll capture my pieces i really don't [Laughter] i'm begging you dude i'll give you 20 bucks if you let me win this one please i'll give you a million dollars please start with this yes but if every game grumps episode i gave you like an extra 20 bucks just to lose to be on camera oh it would be true to form for you my friend just please don't make me look bad god i really need this please please susie and i have kind of been on the rocks a little bit and she's like if i'm bad at checkers that'll be the last straw please please i beg you i'm dying over here everyone everyone knows you're the favorite i need something just give me something everybody knows that's ridiculous oh geez i don't know what to do and never has a move in checkers felt more heady and and crucial than this oh i'm going for the block is there is there a version of this game where we just like gum up all our pieces and nobody can move no i think eventually someone has to make a move that's bad for them oh yes you gotta do it baby now you must taste the nasty well you have two more pieces than me and a queen king king [Laughter] you're my queen king can you queen boy i hate this i wish i could dunk like the greats michael jordan michael b jordan michael jordan michael jordan michael jackson he never faked the funk on the nasty dunk okay here [ __ ] okay here oh what does that mean it's the jeff goldblum thing from jurassic park oh that's right [Music] uh uh i hate this probably hate this what am i gonna do dude you're pretty much f i know but it's like what am i gonna do just accept the effing embrace the f don't tell me enjoy the f don't tell me taste the rainbow which in this context feels much more aggressive i like how they make you finish out the game even though it's horrible [Music] could have been making something yeah i could've put my time creatively so i sped up losing your [ __ ] checkers precious precious minutes of my life it's just like it's like you get what like sometime between like 60 and 100 years not that not that much when you really think about it especially since you don't even remember the first five years and the next 10 years you sort of spend like getting used to life and then the next kind of 20 years you learned in a never-ending growing process so by the time you hit your like 40s then maybe you're starting to get what life is all about and then you can do what you want to do but then you know in your 60s and 70s your body starts breaking down and you just can't move the way you want to so i love the fact that i'm spending precious minutes of my peak life losing to you at checkers when you got that king it was basically like watching a five-minute version of when you like accidentally bump the glass off the table and then you just have to watch it happen yeah that's true what are you doing you freak what are you doing what are you doing what am i doing i'm trying to approach bro i'm get getting that approach homie you don't think i know how to broach but i'm approached king oh there we go [ __ ] that's real nice what's happening what's happening over there just having a good time just enjoying myself it's fine people are allowed to enjoy themselves people who send me some trucks you're an animal this is what you are you're an animal i'm a naughty checkers man yeah i've seen it oh i've seen it first hand i'm gonna start a checkers podcast called what the check this could be the most famous podcast in the world it's gonna be huge you're gonna love it why are you sacking [ __ ] so proud of me i gotta protect before i attack hey chad'll be so proud of you oh [ __ ] [ __ ] up that's not gonna be happy with that this is terrible [Laughter] this is for the birds my dad's not gonna be pleased with that one i wasn't paying attention i was thinking about what what my dad was going to do to be what i can't home i moved c4 to a1 you better believe i'm gonna get five across the ass your [ __ ] is gummed up bro it is a little gummy it is bouncing here and there and occasionally everywhere you better not shout you better not shout better not shout cuz if you [ __ ] shout santa's gone i'll just kill you [Laughter] oh i lose i straight up lose oh [ __ ] dude dude dude [Applause] that might have been the worst move i've ever seen in checkers ever oh no um [Laughter] your dad's gonna be so cross oh um dad please please that was awful he's not gonna take me fishing anymore [Music] bro your dad would be like i don't i don't think i ever saw it anymore i was like i don't know if i have a son oh it's worth it oh my god i'm such a fool that was truly remarkable all i can imagine is that like the the people watching this at home actually got out of their seats and were like oh i think where that checker move happened it's all you i feel like such a doof why would you do such a thing why would you move in such a way why would you move like jagger dude just do it then you're in control aaron i just felt like maybe there was a chance there was a chance yeah and then i [ __ ] gave up three pieces there was a 98 chance [Laughter] wow that was a that was definitely our craziest game of checkers i enjoyed it tremendously all right well i still gotta win it back so here we go oh my god what okay i gotta win it back i got two checkers okay what is this best of three it's best of however many it takes for me to win this 237 [Laughter] i'm sure i'll win 98 in a row yes i hate your cards your guts are what i hate yeah move it oh i like to move it move it i like to move it move it i like to move it open you like to move it let's start trading pieces oh that was faced no i'm in danger oh my gosh [Music] you can't handle the blues secret of nem is an incredible movie you can't handle bismuth and that's the straight blues i don't like it man you're all you're all punked up and i'm all spread out that's that's hot dude i like to you know we gotta huddle together for warmth ugh fine whatever ugh gotta move together as a unit uh uh everything's uh i'm feeling quite uh right now i don't know if i can everything ugh everything's in i don't think so i think i'm gonna fly to los angeles find my [ __ ] brother now you gotta come up with some new secret plans i like how it's the simplest game in the world but we treat it like gary kasparov versus deep blue you know we're just we're both having like the beautiful mind equations over our faces that's incredible he's going through so many permutations no that's not what i meant to do silly boy let me [ __ ] take it you having an aneurysm over there what are you doing man [ __ ] goddammit [ __ ] god damn it the dark art of checkers oh god girl sucks [ __ ] no why did i do that oh god that's a [ __ ] fool i thought it was happening i wasn't thinking oh my god aaron god damn it just [ __ ] i've never watched a grown man fall to pieces like this before this is like this is like you just got home after the divorce and you're just like what am i gonna do man there's nothing i can [ __ ] do i just get taken i just get taken over and over again i get taken 100 years [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] socks [ __ ] what socks [ __ ] just for making a dumb move i didn't think about which is all this game is [Laughter] ridiculous this is fascinating the point what's the point of going on take it i don't care stupid ass would you would you move the wood in the corner for me oh dang it oh cuz never mind with super jump or whatever oh no i just wanted to have like all four cakes at the end oh got it yeah well i think you will right will it will it give it to me still king me yeah yeah that's got to be some kind of special record right [Music] holy crap you really got your ass beat [Laughter] that's okay man well next time i give you something okay next time i get ropes we love you goodbye that was that was very funny no [ __ ]

Channel: Marcus Yamamoto

Views: 102,153

Rating: 4.8590784 out of 5

Keywords: Game Grumps, Chess, Checkers, Chinese Checkers

Id: GFQVHDJknMY

Length: 181min 4sec (10864 seconds)

Published: Tue Jan 05 2021