We’re trying to beat Baldur’s Gate 3 and its IMPERATIVE that we get Minthara Why? Well, Our makes all of his choices COMPLETELY RANDOMLY that's a looot of options well... not 7 Not seven. with this dice roller we coded. Whyyyy? We're not prepared for this. Previously He gave away one of our ONLY friends Astarion to a stranger that he JUST MET now we have an Astarion shaped hole in our party and not many candidates left to fill it so we decided our best bet would be to try to befriend Minthara but that is easier said than done... they kicked us out. every time we zoom out he becomes WHITE it's so weird that’s so weird.. It's terrifying. oh. no?
It's only at a specific range, like, far away. And he’ll be still blue, but at mid range he’s not no way how do we get him up there? I mean, it's not our fault that he can’t jump.. it’s cause he’s
white now well, one of the bears died who is that who is that what is that? hide! Why is he so... intimidating? He's so scary. omg run! Why was he so intimidating? He's just like...appeared out of the shadows. yes.
Let's shoot acid into this bear’s face feels... wrong somehow. Yeah, it does. so does taking this corpse’s carrots I feel like no one has had this battle in this game like this. This is so frustrating. We're just fighting a rock and she's healing it this is so stupid Nettie found a cure.. to living Yes.
Just close your eyes. It would be funny If we put in ALL this effort and then we still can’t recruit Minthara that’d be hilarious she’s she’s practically invisible. listen to her armor clanging. Aight, f*** it get it, Lae’zel we use the super jump. Now we jump far We super jump..., let’s gooo, jump far! we pull the lever oh, we don't have an action. Okay
We survive one turn We survive one turn. can’t... What is that? Oh, for bard pretty useless UNLESS Minthara rolls bard If we even GET Minthara we’re totally getting her we wouldn't do all of this and NOT get her Right? right...? I don't know if that's true. I'm not even going to talk to them We have one goal here. He's already gonna to have to go through a bunch of forced dialogue checks Why can't I drop this? please. She's trying so hard one through three This f**** guy he's so stupid. He's actually dumb. How many hints does he need that this thing's important?? the game has tried to tell us... you REALLY want to look at this I don't. I want nothing to do with this. Actually. Sounds like a situation I could make worse. If I get involved, so I'm going to attempt not to I mean, I'm not helping you, Volo I'm pretty sure I will have an option to attack the goblins or something let’s just beeline for Minthara aw, he’s so cuuute so can we not do anything to help the owlbear? f*** So I have to stop this idiot from talking to help the owlbear ****s sakes that’s not hostile Yeah. Please, please
don't say anything else. okay. Just get him to shut up so we can save the owlbear... you can’t even see me, bro. unless you scroll out a bit say “Minthara” Yes, Yes, he's listening. Okay, we come in here... and we ignore every single person and try to get to Minthara and see if she joins us, don't talk to us, Gut We're going around. Volo is going to f*** stay there for a little while How do we get to Minthara from here without talking to anyone else? She's up here, but we can either get into this door and there's these idiots here or we can go up here and climb this ladder and get down from there. But there's three idiots there also. Okay. The moment of truth. She's perfect for us. this is going to be tough. There are so many options What do we not want? We don't want three and we don't want five. He's probably going to pick three just because of him or five just because of him. It's a two in five chance that- No. Three in five chance. that we continue this dialogue Those are really good odds. Yeah. Okay. Okay. we passed 1 unfortunately, we got there first “visited” That's one way to put it. I'm scared. There’s like.. two bad options, but I don't know if they’re immediate battle What do you do, Urge? Okay. Okay, okay, okay. We've already taken out. Most of them, I guess, is what he's thinking. For f***s sake. Why do we have so many options to say this sh** Okay, he rolled 2 You just need 3 Misty Step scrolls bring a lot of Misty Steps and we'll get in. Hello, Gale me again Don't need any magical items yet. always makes my day better Did he say that... about Wyll? I guess so I think Lae’zel is going to threaten us we may lose her What do you do urge you blink away the discomfort this can only go well how many of these ...? okay only the one is bad only one of them is bad. for now okay. He's good at this. He's good at this. do we have just enough? We do. okay. We don't have the ally repository for this, so we really need to pass these checks. Yeah. Good job, Urge. Let me guess. He's going to have a chance to attack her and then do it Please don't let us f***ing attack her. It did give us another one. with Astarion. 1. End her right now!
2. End her right now!
3. End her right now! Walk away! That’s the trick Just walk away before he gets time to contemplate what he wants to do Yeah. that's f***ing hilarious. She also. She has the same problem, as Urge. One, two, three Urge What do you do? Can you tell me why I keep turning white? What? I don't know you! Stop looking at me like that He did it! he’s doing it! He really is transforming! For now it only happens when you move the camera away. You must learn to control it. It looks like she's only partially mastered it maybe
his potentials that he can, like, fully utilize it. If they get too close, I won't be white anymore. SO STUPID I have to maintain them at mid-range, Well,
that was weird. Hello Gale! Hello guys! Oh no. What? What comes. What comes? What is coming? What came? It's this. What is that? Okay, I'm going away from everybody. No, I've avoided most things. I'm doing
all right. Never mind. I lost my friend A bounty hunter took him. I'm good. Thanks. of course. He would lean into this Except we’re not wise But thankfully, we don't need to be Nevermi- WAIT OH MY GOSH stupid a** Urge! Not wise at all. Oh my God that's ridiculous. Can we even do anything about it now? I don't know. Talk to your friends. Why do they have something to say? because you useed your power. Apparently, it doesn't. Not so much Urge’s He failed a roll of two on his wisdom check. F*** Sorry, Volo We failed the easiest roll in the game. Oh my God That's ridiculous. Bye We then revisit Priestess Gut I heard that! This is pretty dull. Don't fucking do it Urge Don't spend all our money! do we even have all that money? I mean, this is the only time I've ever been relieved to see attack For all of our f***ing money. I doubt it. I really f***ing doubt it Wyll Wyll, one time! He just keeps saying inspirational things What is going on? Wait don't do that. right. Okay. no- Why are you like this? Every battle just ends up in a gangbang in the corner with them trying to hit them. I did not mean to talk to you, buddy. Maybe I can just ask them to let me out. We're in the pit, bro. We're already f***ing in it. Let us out. The spiderss ain't exactly alive, bro. You guys are
f***ing cracked. I'm leaving. I miss
Astarion Yeah me too. He always used to say things that were... funny Yeah. Unlike Laezel and Wyll Who don’t say anything Wyll started a fight Laezel tried to kill us. You should sneak. I didn't mean to steal that. I meant to steal this. I think that's going to work. Well,
what are you doing? Oh my f*** God, What a horrible person. Let it go. It's helpless Aim for his eye! Okay. He keeps switching just joking. He keeps changing his opinion on what he wants to do just a joke bruh Wyll, you can’t even hit a child Come on, man. Urge just missed an on fire prone on ice dog why do I have the “Blessing of Sylvanus” buffs? It's not safe. Go back to the grove. What? How do we save the grove? We killed everybody and sent Minthara there. Hello Gale! What? What is going on? I forgot. Oh yeah yeah yeah that one... I already found it bro Went down that ladder. Let me hook you up with the waypoint. Oh yeah. We’ve got his blessings already I’m glad everyone’s dead! Thank God you wiped those f***ers out. God, I'm glad to be free of that place. Sounds like what happened to the other druids. Not you again... I have a daily limit. I tried. I tried to use it on children. F*** this It's too early for these conversations. This f***ing guy. Is this all you guys want to talk about? God, wake up in the morning. Talk about f***ing aliens and parasites, Ew Whatever! Laezel approves Yes. Drink it! I love flesh You're turning white, aren’t cha? Why does he keep starting dialogues on his own? You sense that Wyll was here before He's white. Who are you? She doesn't know She's dealing with white urge. Not at that range. you won’t and I won't say it a third time except mine. My power was worth it. I think a dead hag is the answer here. I don't understand you. That's a
very Urge response. F*** off! yeah, I will look at the the gentle- the gentleness in his eyes, the concern. He really cared you could tell. difficulty class two I've only failed that one time. But that was on Wisdom... What if we set a trap for her? We just put a ton of barrels in one spot and then we aggro her with that character She teleports to that character and then mayhem. do it
I think Wyll should be the bait the pride of the gate goes over here. Just wait right there. Wyll the pride of the gate. Maybe he can drink like a fire resistant potion do we have a spider resistance potion? Alright, here ya go Wyll. Shouldn't have made ME your enemy. Okay? Okay. Okay. This was the plan. Okay, Then we get her with the fire arrow... Gods... What the f*** was that?! So that's what was in those barrels you put around me. Not cool, guys. Why are they aggro We actually won... All we had to do.. was get rid of Astarion and then get rid of Wyll not cool, guys. Thought I was being celebrated. What else do we have left to do? Pretty much just the creche and the Underdark, right? if there’s something else before that, We should do that before we lose Laezel I think we just do the Underdark first... because- Because we're going to lose Laezel Yeah. I mean, there's so many chances there to do something really f***ing stupid. Why are we getting more of those, guys? Relationship is fair Character’s trust is variable That's weird I thought we would be way down there with. Wyll he keeps disapproving of everything. Well, he likes it when we attack monsters. I guess he liked it when we attacked. the Hag. And Laezel likes it if we attack anything, and that’s kind of Urge’s thing Oh Urge I know what you're going to do. yup I think I can pull it out. we could... pump him up, a little bit give him a little pump. Did you pump him up? Yeah he’s pumped. Let's go!!! He's absolutely JACKED right now. Get it Urge! Your elixir wears off and you drop it. Good job Urge he just needed to get pumped Okay? She finally got an upgrade. right before we give her up, hopefully we can ask the creche for her equipment. Wait, You didn't explode it, though? F*** that's really not good. Get away. ok ok No, this is BAD cause he’s going to go next! That was EPIC! (out of) seven options!! Shut up t- Okay, I guess that one braincell they all share is being spread too thin. that inspired dead Urge?? I mean, if we get to use the merchant, then we can sell or we can take- never mind. Now he's aggro He’s aggro and He's more powerful than any enemy we've ever fought. That's really cool. where did he go? I have no idea Did he just leave...? nice kicks. Urge and helpless creatures.. my gosh. That’s so messed up! It’s Urge and Anything helpless like if it can't fight back, he makes sure it dies! This is so f***ed This is actually awful, bro. my God. Actually so messed up. Take her boots. Just shoot this idiot Get rekt :3 He doesn't even know? oh He’s coming hey, f*** you! Ouch! my gosh, You need to take that (hammer) off. How far can you run?? across the entire world? Okay, Hold on, Urge Don’t get sassy with me, Okay? What does that even do? it just does damage even if he misses Tenacity apparently doesn't do damage If I miss f*** he’s so scary he doesn't stop It’s White Urge f*** sakes Why is he so scary? Jeeez that’s f***d I can't wait to see what he does with his f*** turn Probably something highly destructive. What do you do? He used..Misty Step? threw a potion of sleep He used Misty Step, slowed himself then threw a person asleep and missed and he thought that was hilarious Oh no, Wyll’s jumpinng I'm taking those off of him. that hammer is f*** dangerous. in Wyll’s hands What? Another f**** civilization ruined by Urge look at him transform at will It's actually the camera distance true, it’s not at will yet transforming NEAR Wyll he’s Light Urge now that's strange. I'm assuming we're just going to attack him next He's turned into White Urge oh, nvm He sees him as white right now. Power courses through you, AUTHORITY You have so many options because of the power coursing. And your authority think I'll attack him why are our lives like this? we’re literally speedrunning the underdark We don't care about any single person potion of poison...? did I throw
a bad health potion at him? it says “Urge destroyed Suspicious Potion” It looked like a f*** health potion That's the point. I think, it was probably from Auntie Ethel weeeeeeeee we got ‘em Urge is determined to make this playthrough as hard as possible. Launched the game into a banger Are you kidding me? WHY is he up there?? he just never jumps He’s so annoying watch THIS I couldn't watch it actually, because it showed us a rock Wyll... sacrifices himself as usual. What?! they're standing on nothing. This is f*** Wyll should have an aura of light. Wyll, have an aura of light Maybe they’ll all attack him “Maybe they’ll all attack him more”? Is that what you said? maybe he will become more visible. They're going to be real shocked when they see a white guy coming in. and once he gets closer, he’s not going to be any more. Come on, Urge Of course there's an attack option. There's always an attack option Come on, ANYTHING other Four... he’s gonna fail, too f***s sakes oh? he won’t fail if we drink another elixir of giant strength if we “pump him up”? we could also use Tides of Chaos I guess You really want to push this guy? Yeah. We really want to succeed here. Otherwise we'll just look like an idiot Lae’zel approves WTF I was so happy we didn’t roll attack and then I read option Number four, that was f*** hilarious he didn’t even Say anything, he just shoved him into the water Jesus Christ. He pumped himself up for that hold on a moment. Why are you drinking... That elixir of giant’s strength? No reason. Hold on. Just thirsty. It's water. He's an enemy now. oh no This is where he's gonna land. All his attacks now, Never mind. Wyll is still Wyll That's so annoying. That's one of our big potions, too every time He says that, it's during a battle he started. Guess they didn't like it when I pushed their leader into the water. Well, that was fun. she really is stealthy we doubted her shut up, Wyll is she with us... AND over there? I don't know. You doubted my class choices. Witness my stealth. holy s*** She's so stealthy and fast. She's there, AND with them. She's just a god. So stealthy. Shut up, Wyll I hate that he calls himself “the blade” I am the blade. No one else calls him that only he does that’s so Urge Yeah. shut up, Wyll this is Wyll’s specialty Honestly, running through fire Get down there, Wyll oh f*** should be able to survive long enough to grab sh*** none of that s*** is worth it. What am I doing? it’s literally 2 gold and like an arrow. did I literally just see that he’s immune to acid Yes. What? close the door Close the door Nevermind there’s no door to close may as well leave Wyll behind f*** Wyll he can be the lever boy sharp as lever that was so stupid. probably nowhere Nobody needs me. They left me here with the levers only on Urge bye, Urge he just got up for that motivational speech. Guys, I don't have long. Sometimes the only way out is thr- its lag he probably hit him, right? its Wyll’s time yep, you said that Wanderer into Fire Gatherer of Mithral he’s gonna become encumbered I wish I had a bag of holding, but for now, I’ll use Wyll The Bag of Frontiers So that’s how he gets stuck. Where is he going?? He decided to end it! Should I jump...? Oh no wait,
I don't want to hear this. No f***ing way. No way. What are the chances Is it gonna work? Oh my God. Let's go. Why did we suddenly become heavily encumbered? she gave us. all of her s*** Right. She does that. This is so bad. And we don’t know if Minthara will even consider joining us. Or if we can even pass all the checks required for her. I don't want Urge to just end up with. with Wyll we actually hate Wyll The Blade of Frontiers Stop saying that... Where are my other allies? defender of the people Please Urge Keep Laezel Sacrifice Wyll if you have to no please don't speak on her behalf, Urge. At least she put us in our place. Yeah. Well... persuasion. Okay. I don't know you. I pose no threat! That's true. He doesn't know him. It's not true that he poses no threat. Urge is good at this. Do we need the tides (of chaos) or should we save the tides for a potential next option? 15 though? that’s kinda high It's high, but he has a plus six. Okay, okay. Okay. He's good at this. Okay. He's good at this. He's good at this. He's good- This is so f***ed This is f***ed maybe that was okay. I mean, I guess if we succeeded persuading him, it would have been better. BUT... Might be okay. If we just kill them, then we can't talk to them. Why does he always fail every roll? omg I hate Urge. He's so annoying. He's so- *cough* Ah there’s a little bit of smoke there... I can’t- I can’t get her Ah that little bit of cloud... I can’t cast... There’s no way I’ll hit her from here. There's nothing I can do on my turn she’s too obscured someone under the bridge talking to us. They forced Rafael to be here because we never found him? I don't care what you are. All right. Oh we got some food cause- yeah, he stole it! I’ll come back when I'm ready. On second thought, your stuff weighs. quite a lot... Nope, that's- Lady Esther! Whoops. My mistake Urge the type of guy to steal the egg and then keep it That's none of my business. I really didn't like getting Ping-Ponged around Nice shot! no. oh? okay. Fighting me will end badly for you. We need to pass this. okay. I'm kind of a badass. This can only go badly. I'm not. infected, not me. It's Wyll Wyll is infected. We could just end up leaving. I lied. It's me. I'm the one with the tadpole. no.
Please don't tell her. Stand back. I'm going first. Okay. That's good. She approved??? She likes our balls. That describes Herbs very well. Urge very well Herbs? Herbs Me first. This is good. Unless it can kill us. At least it can’t kill her then. is that a choice? Think so. “faculties” What do you do, Urge? Drink up, Urge He’s like UHHHH SLRPP *tilt* I'm using insight for this. Why? what if we die???? Okay :3 There's not a lot there. I really hope we don't die here. What if Urge dies here??? Wait. Are we actually gonna die? Wait we're actually dying I don't think it worked I doubt she’s just getting her- yup hello.
Good Sir, Don't go in there... I think, uh Nobody needs to go in there ever again, actually... You’re not gonna wanna go in there... either. Nope, don't care Why is that an option here? I don't even know. What inspired him to want to attack her? Why did they put that there? They hate us. I don't know what the point of attacking here. It's like, why did he want to? Based on what she said, See what Urge does with this. Wait What are those things in the barrels? omg and they’re all f***ing enemies Nope, they’re neutral! Okay, get ‘em boys The squad rolled out. unintentionally. Okay, Thanks. Wyll we come back, Wyll’s dead That was sick, he slowly transitioned into Dark Urge as he was walking. This is a big mistake. What are you going to do? Urge? This is not my business. I'm not getting involved. I just didn't want to do it. But I should have He’s lying. don't think about it don't think about it. Here you go Maybe we should have put the lock on the other side... Easy, Where did he go? ok Probably not Urge. Well, if Minthara joins... and we have a full squad again, then maybe. Just another artifact he’s just decided he doesn't care about Dire times. I hate him. omg I hate him. He told Wyll to kill Karlach and now he’s telling Laezel to kill Voss He's so stupid. and annoying. We might just f*** kill Minthara after all of this, like who the hell knows. (lmao I’m so salty) I actually don't even know how Wyll is still with us. Like,
we actually just kill everybody Occasionally we say something nice. Yeah, And that really keeps him going. Wyll's just in an abusive relationship. Well, Laezel f***ing loves us now. f***
we’re far away omg Urge, don’t be aggro. I am magic incarnate! these vines will not hold me. Fine. Do it. Who is that? What? He’s lying for us? He’s also a truesoul. right I guess if you're evil, they give you a chance here. To not immediately get everyone aggro on you. Even though we chose to accept our fate he's right there, Wyll, shut up. omg Please. For the first time in your f***ing life, don’t pick attack. okay. he’s ratting him out!!! It's okay. That might be better than attack. You're going down with me. We just ratted him out! After he saved us this is so stupid... This so dumb. I can't believe we did that. he's the one who ends up attacking. Okay, but we're not. They're all yellow. They're neutral. Okay, Okay. This is very interesting. Don’t have any Sorcerer outbursts. Attack?! Why is that a f***ing option? please. okay. Okay, okay, This is so dumb. Okay. Okay. Show Jaheira the artifact.. Okay. I tried. Drop it so many times. Okay. All of these seem reasonable. Like sometimes they just throw attack in for some reason. like you could be having a completely innocuous conversation. Just attack is one of the options. What the heck is number four? my God.
I'm scared. I've still got it. I have 7 health... Stop being so f***ing difficult. Just. Yes. There you go, buddy. Just f***ing drink up. We don't need Laezel’s approval We don't need her approval. She's already f***ing in love with us for killing everybody we need.
Wyll to like us more We got to work on him. We got to keep our loose alliance together. No, I'm just f***ed up by nature. I don't make my own decisions. Somebody rolls a f***ing dice... What did he pick? No.
It has no influence on me whatsoever. Please
don't hurt me. please, Urge just be nice. Just be nice. At least he’s honest... I guess she's so desperate to trust Urge and he's so desperate to not have her trust him. Don't expect us to stick to any plan. I am very offensive Now we attack her. Sorry. I kind of made him our enemy. He has more of a grudge against us than her. Yeah. They really planned this out. You know I’m fourth in line! I’m fourth in line! Hello. I guess he’s pretending Urge just likes to toy with them. a little bit. He just likes to give a little bit of a coy answer first and then start murdering I trick them a little bit. Now let's kill him. Get them boys F***ing Wyll Are you kidding me? Can't get to the ladder! He’s blocking it. Sharp as ever. blade of frontiers. Defender of the people Defender of the ladder. Nobody will go up this ladder. Not even my friend. What did so much damage? and from so far? it did a lot of damage to the ladders. Oh no Wyll had one job! No! My ladder! Ignore the pixie... Shut up I don't respond. well to threats. very true. He's very self-aware. Anyone ever confronts me, I normally just pick attack. Hey, we released her Can you get me out of these plants? What is it going to do? interesting selection... Yay Moonrise Towers!!! I can't wait to come here and find out. Minthara’s not here. My blood is exceptionally sought after. its clown blood. I can't carry very much. I’m always encumbered. this is going to not go f*** well. Yeah, this is all wisdom. Also. Yeah. We never had any chance. No, don’t roll attack... Okay. omg Urge Okay, that's good. She's gonna be kind of mad at us. for this probably. At least we didn't attack them. I'm going downstairs. Actually. OMG He's horrifying. What the f*** That was f***ed well
time to go save Minthara Please Urge This is your one chance to make a friend. Come on Urge Very important decision. This is a good time to decide to kill someone. He always
decides to kill people. Please don't freaking torture her here. why? Please don't torture her? Are we gonna do anyt- Urge Come on. okay. it's a 50/50. That's what it comes down to?? Okay. Jesus Christ, I can't even say anything, I’m-my I’m so nervous! this whole conversation. And then we still have to talk to HER afterwards Who knows what the f*** is gonna happen Yeah, Urge Don't ruin this. Don't ruin this Urge. another check? please No. Anything else... okay. Just don’t give it to us... again. come on. WHY THE 50/50?! okay. Okay, okay. Jesus Christ. Well,
how are we going to leave from here? We're going to figure that out when we get everyone there! This guy's the worst f***ing guard ever. They all look so stupid wait.
Why are you passing rolls? now what? Now we have to figure out how to get out without where is the exit...? so we have to get over here. There's no way we're getting through that room s*** Hello Okay, We’ve got to get Minthara out of here... I don't know what I'll say if they catch us. I'll probably choose attack need another f***ing group stealth huddle... Y'all are f***d up. I'm leaving. It's not safe. But you can go there Halsin’s there By the way. It's such a dumb class for her.
