4 Famous TV Ads That Invented Horrifying Fictional Universes - The Spit Take

hello the internet and welcome to another episode of the spit take my name is Jack O'Brien I'm the Editor in Chief of krck you know how an SNL sketch with a thin premise will occasionally get turned into a movie and everyone freaks out even though mcgruber Wasing awesome well when an ad succeeds the advertising industry has the similar but more difficult job of trying to figure out how to build an entire fictional Universe around the most unsustainable of premises hello for $110,000 who should on some milk I'm sorry maybe next time got milk well that might sound exactly the same as the SNL thing they have no clue whether the first ad succeeded because it made people laugh or scared them or made them horny I mean they should know it's pretty obvious but a shocking amount of the time they guess wrong thank you and create this terrifying David Cronin bergian nightmare universe that's the second reason their job is more difficult they're they're not very [Music] talented they first appeared in the 9s with an off-the-cuff joke blaming BB King for eating one of their fellow M&M's Mr King at them one bite CL with my own ey that one joke spawned an entire fictional Universe of needy sentient smartmouth M&M's who crave our attention and who we in return want to eat like a dark meditation on the PL of farm animals who I'd like to think we wouldn't eat if they could talk and fell in love with us I'm really glad you came by why is that cuz I'm all out which one of you was peanut and while the Eminem Universe never addresses the possibility of cannibalism lays but you're a potato or evokes the Holocaust poptarts wa is this thing working we do learn that M&M's Melt from the inside when they get horny that they're prone to kidnap napping each other and us that they glory in the death of rival types of candy playing with the body parts and splashing in the guts of a melted chocolate bar and what is the other one I would do for love but I won do that oh yeah we're fing [Music] them there's always been something slightly off-putting about Tony the Tiger with other Cal mascots there's a clean binary you're either clothed or naked you're either imaginary and magical or a sobering depiction of the neighborhood junkie and the cool guy who sells him drugs but Tony's never seemed quite sure where he fits in I always thought he just magically showed up at some hockey match or casual Sports encounter like a sugar induced Tyler Duran then he started guest coaching your little league games and people went along with it because he he's getting a little older and didn't seem to have much to do but at a certain point the ads made the baffling decision to imply that Tony had a life before and after each commercial appearance as a lonely single male adult notice how the dads politely ignore him good job man okay he's like that kid in elementary school who was always screaming hey guys wait for me if that kid was a 50-some single tiger who seems to be lifting a lot of Weights in his downtime hey sport run ahead and fetch dad's rifle will you all right now for the best part now where were we got the balls it's up and it's good and now he's in youring house cogs Frosted Flakes so every single time Tony randomly showed up in a kid's house that's how he got in there walking through the front door with a big weird smile on his face off the back board dad oh hey I must have walked up and started playing the saddest game of hangman ever in your driveway without seeing you there playing basketball that's not even how you play Hangman what's that phrase Tiger Tiger yeah sure it is go make some friends your own age Tony showcasing an electronic miracle that fits in your pocket should be a pretty straightforward Affair you show the product how much it costs whatever marginally unique abilities it has these ribs are insane hello you got to be kidding me that's right [ __ ] we can now answer the phone while eating ribs your parents are going to be like what Tiffany texted oh I got it holy [ __ ] you can read text messages with your finger that's creepy as I guess it's hard to explain what's different about your phone without coming off as a little petty or an alien which means it's time to let the advertisers go off prompter hello yo Danny Boy Ben is that you yep not only does this ad completely fail to show off the phone's features but if you give a teenage boy hairy palms and then show literal crabs coming out of the pub likee hairs around his hand vagina people are going to think about what he's going to do to his friend friend's mouth when he gets home later yo you awake bro also weird choice to put the part words come out of down by the mouth and the part you speak into up by the ear since that's not how phones work but I'm sure they add their reasons oh right so the person representing the consumer in their ad could the horrifying sci-fi metaphor they invented for the product they're supposed to be trying to sell man that must be like marketing [Music] 101 now a question for graduate level marketing courses if you're the food industry how do you get more money from people who are already consuming your addictive product at a rate that's become a national health epidemic you can't show them eating more of your food you probably can't even show how much they're eating already without grossing everyone out and no you can't just hold them up at gunpoint and take all of their money for the last time what's spooky is that the entire food industry seems to have leapt to their feet and shouted the same weird ass answer in unison Drop Dead Fred the food addiction of course if we create an irresponsible grotesque and occasionally violent imaginary adult or animal that externalizes their addiction we make addictive behavior seem normal and absolve ourselves and our consumers of all guilt I mean big tobacco just bribed a bunch of doctors but we could try this I guess if you replace the junk food they use to control their Cravings with literally any street drug Those ads immediately become the most coherent metaphor to ever appear in an anti-drug PSA okay these ballpark Frank ads seem to be trying to scare kids straight about the horrifying thing their product will make them do I tell you Frankfurt is so good your girlfriend won't feel safe around you no more heck you won't feel safe around yourself mister just a few hours without one boy you won't be able to control the testosterone demon bursting out of your [Music] chest that's it no final shot with the old guy Shak taking his fist as his air is restored just Eerie Stillness of unbreathing death and a lifetime of guilt for the kid oh wait did that old guy knock a drink out of someone's hand at the beginning ah never mind I didn't realize he deserved to be murdered and hey guys thanks for watching the video you presumably watched unless you just skipped to the end to watch the end plates like I do cuz I really just super love the end plates so if you're like me and you just watch the end plates welcome to yet another amazing cracked YouTube please subscribe to our Channel endplate all right it seems like we're coming to the end of the endplate but I hope you enjoyed this episode of cracked end plates

Channel: Cracked

Views: 1,451,997

Keywords: Fictional Universe, The Spit Take, MacGruber, Saturday Night Live (TV Program), Marketing, Ads, David Cronenberg (Film Director), M&M's (Brand), Commercial, Naya Rivera (Celebrity), Tony The Tiger (Fictional Character), Kellogs, Cereal Mascots, Commercials, cracked, cracked.com, sketch, comedy, funny, spoof, humor, satire, Parody

Id: 7ufU5nZjb8A

Length: 7min 42sec (462 seconds)

Published: Wed Nov 12 2014