WIN The War In Your HEAD And Find PEACE | David Goggins

everybody I'm excited to share today's conversation with David Goggins with you but prior to doing that I want to warn you the language use in this interview is very strong and there's profanity use throughout the conversation David speaks in this interview like David speaks and so if you have children that you don't want to hear very intense language this would not be the interview for you to listen to or watch and you can make sure that they're out of the room or anywhere around you when they're listening to it or if you yourself are offended by strong language like that I just want to warn you as a friend that maybe this isn't the interview for you if you can tolerate it or it doesn't bother you at all it's gonna change your life though what's motivating you as of stories I'm telling you about what I did in my life once I stopped living that I'm no more yes as a man Lupe another man you know where the man's done I didn't want to win I still don't want to win for some reason I don't care about winning for some I just want to go to distance the Helmick was very different than most of them it has on her feet the whole time my stress fractures my I'm blown up my legs are broken up since they humming now there's no walking I can't heal so what I did was I casted the duct tape so I put the duct tape over the sock but basically it's a 45 minutes my legs and when they go numb you don't feel and people say why did you do that is either that or not be company welcome back to max out everybody I got him right there that's Goggins everyone number one requested guest you don't know this for my show the last two years is you really yeah yeah really honored honored I got to tell you the best by far off-camera conversation I have ever had is what we've been having I think you would agree but good for you that's very good for both of their real good and hopefully that'll transition over to the show itself but this this is a gentleman who completed Navy SEAL training Army Ranger training Air Force attack P training I believe he's the only person in history to do that sir this is a guy did three hell weeks sixty plus ultra marathons where I'll run with broken bones for 30 miles to get into one of the mega ultra marathons and a lot of people call him him the toughest man alive but I'm excited because I get to call him my friend now I've enjoyed this conversation so much and I think you guys are gonna join the on camera one so this is Goggins everybody appreciate you happy man thank you thank you okay if I call you David gosh fine man David gagas it's fine Goggins David just don't call me Dave okay will you you're Goggins now but you grew up david Goggins right and i most people know this about your upbringing because i want to get into this stuff but I was fascinated before I met you like what makes this you know I'm saying like what are the circumstances the conditions the thinking that turned somebody into you right and so start a little bit with like how you grew up because I think that's part of the story well my dad so I grew up in Buffalo New York my my dad really helped create this I'm not giving him credit yeah like oh he was a great dad like clap my hands for his ass he helped create this because he was just that he was a devil mm you know he was a guy that had to be very insecure very beat down something had happened to him he was younger because the way he treated me my brother my mom was just horrible so he would beat us my mom my brother my me and I'm not something like oh you got in trouble and something to give you whipping and he would he was a drunk okay so whenever he woke up man he woke up drinking went to bed drinking and that's how it was him he get drunk he's got violent it's my mom caught my dad cheating we got home about four o'clock in the morning so about seven eight years old and I hear some ruckus outside my room as I'm getting ready bed down for the night and my mom and dad are outside my room because there's a staircase right there and my dad is smacking the hell out my mom and knocks her almost unconscious where she's kind of out of it you know she's kind of loopy she falls down he grabs her by her hair and dragging the other stairs by her hair and so at this age I'm certain thinking man you know what the [ __ ] should I do man like you know I'm scared but then something made me saying you got to go and do something homework but I'm scared to death of this guy he's been beating the [ __ ] out of me since I can remember and I mean like laying me out for nothing I'm still thinking man okay man like I am I gonna do so my brother he and I were very different where my brother would see the fighting he would go to this room and hide I didn't do that I always stuck around so this time I stuck around I decided to help her out so going on the stairs and I jump on his back and literally he tells my mom you're raising the gangster and she's like on the floor and Ethan was smiling almost like proud but that smile went to a frown pretty quick and he beat the living hell out of me and he beat me literally from my neck down to my ankles like black and blue so the next morning I wasn't going to school half the day my mom woke up and she pulled the covers back and what she saw was how bruised I was and so when she pulled the covers back and saw a bruise that was I'll never forget looking at her face because she used to write letters screaming you know for me and my brother to miss PE because we were so bruised up from getting beaten so you know how he's sick or whatever and so you know she was lying a lot for my dad so this particular day she got a letter but when I laid in the bed I looked at my mom and she put the covers back I'll never forget looking at her face and her face is tattooed in my brain and while I say that this past year I got the VFW Awards for Americanism award and if you google david Goggins VFW award I'm in front of 5,000 veterans I'm getting this amazing award John McCain got it and I'm up here thinking about my freaking this award this is amazing it's for giving back and also having a great military career and I could give this six minute long speech and I'm up there man I'm talking and I'm thinking I'm thinking people who helped me out I get to my mom she's sitting back you know she's sitting right here on stage right behind me and I haven't cried in 30 years I came a picture haven't cried in 30 I don't do that and I turn around and say and I you know I want to thank my mom for not picking me up when I was knocked down but teach me how to get up because she never picked me up ever and because her circumstances sucked so anyway I look back and I said that and I got done I don't even get a chance to say it I looked at her eyes in my head went right back to her face when she saw me bruised up and that [ __ ] me up and for 58 seconds look at the video and you'll see me my head's down and I'm sobbing Wow and I'm in front of 5,000 vets and the guy who was who was hosting the thing had to come up to me and like put his hand my back and I was just destroyed overcome with emotion hmm and then 58 seconds go by and I get up and I deliver this speech and so I tell you that because life my life tattooed me and so when I came from Buffalo I was eight years old several learn I have one learn disability had several but I hid all this [ __ ] I never talked about my dad being crazy or I couldn't read I couldn't write I get held back in my second grade so now we moved my mom now finds the courage to move to the small town called Brazilian was that beating the catalyst that made how is a Catholic and that's probably why you flashback to that site okay I guess basically that next morning so this will happen that that beating happened in maybe two days later my mom's in the living room while my dad's in the kitchen talking to one of his girls my mom walks in the kitchen the me my brothers sitting in our you know standard locations at the table my dad hitting the table me my brother sided table and there's a phone behind my dad he always talked on the phone smoking cigarette drinking his scotch and he's talking to one of his girls on the phone and my mom walks in and this is where she was at mentally she walked in look at me my brother and she said you guys can come or you guys can stay but I'm getting the [ __ ] out of here and so she was broke like she was just broken and I got my [ __ ] and I packed I was gone quick my brother was kind of like what should I do so well long story short he doesn't come with us to Brazil Indiana but he didn't want to come we had car troubles on the book he had car trouble all kind of [ __ ] happen but we finally get to Brasilia let me jump in real quick first off when he says the book everybody I've read a lot of books it's my favorite thing about you obviously there's this things we're gonna get into in a little bit here that are just remarkable about you that you've achieved actually I don't think it remarkable about you I think you found remarkable spaces in your own mind that other people could also find right but I think it's remarkable you found them given these circumstances well but the book that he's referring to guises can't hurt me and when you read this book everybody I'm telling you these stories like he's telling them now they jump like I read the whole book in one day and the reason is is because I was so fascinated with you in the first place but it's a it's I think it's almost like a documentary into what can build somebody like you but it like for me people that are listen to this especially you young people that listen to it I know some of the language is strong but I want y'all to understand something no matter what you're going through right now whether you're seven years old or 77 years old those things don't define you this man what you're about to hear is incredible what he's turned himself into from a dad who was in those conditions too I think your mom was great right but you've sort of said mom wasn't ever again completely herself after those situations right then he goes into school has a learning disabilities behind because he wasn't going to school kind of starts just lying and cheating to get his way through school stuttered stutter stutter started bad like my elementary years I stuttered so bad I had these white splotches although every minds gonna have patches of hair falling out a big stress stressed I was so stressed out from my childhood and then now I'm in this situation where I'm like god man I I'm dumb I'm not smart and and now I'm like this this black kid amongst all these white people it just made me feel just [ __ ] up and my mom was working three jobs yeah we live in a $7 a month place and she was never home and I was like so but I didn't want to put my troubles on my mom before that my soon-to-be stepdad got murdered one instant that really shocked my mind was it was Christmas so picture everything I talked about me this is my seventh grade year we're about to go out for you know so school so so so Christmas breaks about to happen and so here we are we had elementary to junior high that wrote our bus and we pull up in front of the junior high school and the bus lets out but not yet this kid who missed the bus he missed the bus cause he had some cookies for the bus driver he goes over and I tell the story could the story it [ __ ] me up so bad and this this kid mom brought him to school and I seen them pull up I'm in the back of the bus and I'm in the very back right by the back wheel facing the parking lot the parking lot is probably 20 feet wide and 15 buses are lined up and we all open the bus doors the same time we all get out so the kid I see him the mom yells over you forgot something he obviously forgot the cookies he goes back gets the cookies I look forward to bus moves forward maybe this much the next thing I know I'm hearing this lady screaming pop her lungs pulling like at her hair this is just yanking that her hair just screaming bloody murder I'm looking over the same lady that called a little bored like what the hell and she's looking down under my tire mm-hmm and so I see these things on my window and I know what they were but they're like little spots so you know how the old bus school you know the buses have little things you pushed and you pulled her down I pushed me I looked down looking at her and her face her eyes are looking right down underneath my tire now like what the hell is she looking at so I looked down in this kid's head it was this flat and his eyes were bugged out his head and and I tell you that story because a year almost exactly a year later the same exact timeframe the day after Christmas my mom shouldn't be stabbed my seam is dead that got murdered my god so that I tried to bury that and now my eighth grade year he gets murdered and so what happens I had to bring you back here to set the tone for what happened here I want to understand what the hell you just said you're telling me in the seventh grade you watched a young man get run over by a bus he I saw the after you saw that after of his oh my so what I did so so I got off the bus and this is what curiosity does to you this is devastating my life I'm walking now so I ought to go to the principal's office because I was like witness to this [ __ ] some of the prisoners office sitting there and the one thing I did was I looked under the bus mm-hmm as I saw I see this now look under the bus as I'm walking to the principal's office and I see these little kids shoes I'm telling this because this [ __ ] is it's about PTSD and you know so I already had it for my childhood now I'm in seventh grade and I see his little kid's shoes like this big he used it he was elementary kid just twisted in and I'm just like with the [ __ ] the nearly a year later the day after Christmas a year later my soon-to-be stepdad gets murdered and I tell you that because I slept on my floor for probably I don't know four four months to six to six months like I was afraid to sleep in my bed for some reason don't know why some psychological [ __ ] is like but I'm painting this picture for he let you know boy where I was at like yeah so one time I in my Spanish class we had all of our notebooks that that stayed in the class mm-hmm so and you know obviously your names on it yeah you go get your notebook for a class and I always sat back in the back of every class man because I just want to be yeah look at me don't call on me yeah I don't know [ __ ] oh my notebook up to the first page and on it was a noose like a little hangman you with me hanging from it with the same thing [ __ ] I'll kill you and this is in the 90s this is the 90s in 1995 the KKK marched in the 4th of July parade in Brazil Janna now they weren't allowed to march like actually in the parade they were allowed to march a hundred or two hundred feet behind it my mom didn't know how bad my grades were she never saw one report card I hit I hit everything from and she even asked she was so bogged down with life and so I got away with a lot of [ __ ] because her mind was occupied so it made me honestly a weaker person hmm so I scammed life my mom helped me scam life for a while but this time I could have scam life I what the second time took the ASVAB test failed it again and a week later she got a letter in the mail from my high school and I'm a junior in high school she later says pretty much your son's gonna flunk out he's missed 25% of school cuz she was always gone Sonny one's school he's gonna miss school and sorry or he's gonna flunk out so I was exposed myself my mom goes well she read the letter to me she put my bed and her best advice was guess what you gonna flunk out of school that was it in the conversation so this one I developed my accountability mirror and this is awesome I I look in the mirror and at this time I didn't want to be the black kid in school there's like five or six of us in school are like 1700 kids like that and I made up a character to kind of like draw attention from color and so what I did was I started to design haircuts and what hair could I have was the old man and I shaved my head up here just like this you did this I did this and I would keep the hair on the side like old man has and one time I shaved my whole head and had a reverse part so I had hair up here and the kind of zigzag so I did things to be this cool crazy kind of like creative kid you know like criss cross came out this time I had pants saggin but backwards so my my back pockets here I had to push my I was crazy man but I was a crazy cool kid in school hmm so I look in the [ __ ] mirror I see this letter I'm [ __ ] up and I'm like you know what man no one is coming to help me yeah I remember back to it my principal second I went to the principal when they brought that [ __ ] up my car and in my notebook and the best advice he can give me god help his saw was this they're ignorant they spelled Niger Niger and so that's but honestly I talked to the guy as I wrote my book and I have nothing wrong with principal Freeman mm-hmm he actually I actually interviewed him for the book and he was happy interview he was good man mmm what the [ __ ] you could tell some black your white guy in white society we could we could tell me yeah you can shut another [ __ ] school and have a [ __ ] dad so I started talking to myself this way in this mirror hmm what the [ __ ] is principal [ __ ] up at that time like this is the best you can [ __ ] do principal Freeman mmm that was my mind living in this mirror it wasn't my mom it wasn't principal Freeman it wasn't my dad it was me because well nobody coming back to [ __ ] help David Gaga's that was my mindset now and so with my nan spelling ass I started getting these sticky notes long and writing you're [ __ ] up and my mom wakes up like what what is wrong with you mmm I go man I'm I have to change cuz I can't stay here I can't I licked myself and realized and I was defeated I got look at myself I'm like Who am I so I'm defeated in this mirror and I'm like ok I'm changing I said mom can we please get a tutor so we can only afford $15 a week for a tutor so I have 4 hours a month 4 hours a month I had a 4th grade reading level man 4 hours a month for 6 months so I had so this tutor did one thing for me very big much like remember her damn name mmm but basically she saw that I was slow very slow and could it retain [ __ ] yeah I think she was joking she's you're gonna have to write down everything a thousand times for you remember this mm-hmm I took it as s okay literally Roger that okay so I live he went to the store and I bought these spiral notebooks and I started literally writing down math equation the same [ __ ] math equation over and over and over and over again when it came to a paragraph comprehension I couldn't read the [ __ ] paragraph and then remember it so we have like I think 25 or 30 paragraph comprehension things I had it right down the whole [ __ ] thing like a whole paragraph and you you don't have much time to take the [ __ ] test but that's how I learned okay so how long the the indium Navy dive man was like a thousand pages Navy diamond I got it a year in advance oh my gosh and wrote the book out probably fourteen times like the boilers law child's long gay lussac's law dalton's law all of these law but over and over the whole manual so it's not like so now I've done that so many times I can go back in my mind it's okay page 71 was blows law and I can go back in and I'm looking at it right now and I remember writing it down so many times that it takes me said okay I got it and I can write it down almost verbatim how I saw that's how I learned even to the day but the work ethic I had people think I became this guy from running yeah no I became this guy from [ __ ] study mmm I started study for hours what might might take you an hour to learn take me two days so that's where in this at the table at the table and my best friend Johnny remembers me it's like God you like you just changed something happened I got obsessed mm-hmm so I take the test I score high I get in the Air Force and that's when I'm like man I'm gonna be a prayer rescue man and this is when I realized my teach myself how to swim I'll tell myself on a swim and this and I realized man that I'm negative buoyant as hell hmm and there's a lot of things so what gets people in Special Operations is to water not swimming but the water conference when they're like taking your air from you and you're underwater panic I realized I was very uncomfortable so long story short I was there for six weeks I was moving on free well a second in my class and I was getting through all the water conference barely but I wanted to quit every [ __ ] night I didn't go to sleep every night this is it just paranoia to the next day of getting back in that pool so six months go by we have this medical examination and they draw my blood and they said you have sickle-cell sickle cells a blood disease that some African Americans have basically you know if something happens in the stressful situations stroke heart attack sudden death this happened to a few African Americans in the military so they pulled me from training saying you can't do this job and we when you live a very stressed out life like I was living yeah that's your norm mm-hmm so not sleeping being scared that was my norm mm-hmm I want gonna quit but when they pull you out of training and now I'm [ __ ] comfortable so now I'm seeing my class of twenty four guys it was like a hundred and fifty now it's twenty four guys and they're in the pool and I'm on the side of the pool I'm not in the water now I'm seeing what I was doing I'm seeing guys struggling panicking in the water like what to quit I'm like [ __ ] that Wow I'm not going so now I'm comfortable and I'm able to see now I'm not going back so now my big dhruv being a pair of rescue men I'm now seeing that do this mm-hmm I'm like I want to get out the Air Force Wow I don't you wouldn't be the [ __ ] military so this what I'm saying is I'm hoping now that this sickle-cell thing is gonna get me kicked out of the military cuz I'm like okay I'll go back in the [ __ ] I'm done so I'm not getting happy cuz now I'm like I won't quit they're gonna medically drop me from the course this is great and I can keep my head up I learned how to read I learned how to write I passed the ASVAB test but I'm fixing everything on the surface I'm not going into the [ __ ] dungeon mm-hmm so the doc calls up I go back to the doctor so I'm like skipping down there thinking I'm getting out of here man medically discharged he goes man you know what you were doing good in your class and we don't really know we don't know how you got this far with this whatever so guess what we could do we're gonna put you back in the Train I'm like [ __ ] so but I'm thinking now all you have about a couple you know two and a half weeks left a trainee come mr. week a week and some change so going you're a great man I have to suck sup man I can do this so I'm trying to motivate myself on the way back to my seal my command officer Sartain Lumbergh I get the something Lumbergh star number looks at me since Goggins mass great you're back in the training you got start from day one because I'm not critical poorest partial TRADOC I can't miss that many days and I'm like but I was a great liar and I was looking at a hardcore man and tell him that I just [ __ ] quit mmm so I looked down and said hey you know what Sarge man this this sickle cell theme and the doc was talking about sudden death stroke heart attack I can get [ __ ] by sickle-cell but I don't think about it I knew I was struggling I knew had some some health issues but I thought because I was killing myself and while I was doing he said know what you're right man I wouldn't want to do that either so he gave me a medical out of pararescue and he said we when we figure this out more where have you come back I whatever going back like I never I'm never getting back in the [ __ ] water again but I was able to leave on a medical bar I quit you quit why do you admit it why do you why do you tell this I have to because everybody thinks I'm the world's toughest [ __ ] right and I might be somewhere about that now mm-hmm but that's where I was hmm and I tell the story because if I just talked about I broke the pull-up record I I did all these [ __ ] races I went through still travel with you I was in three hell weeks Ranger School if I'll talk about all the badassery like we like doing social [ __ ] media mm-hmm and I don't tell you that was a fucked-up kid and I was scared of [ __ ] and I was depressed and then secure and in all this [ __ ] what good am I for anybody right I'm a superhero mmm-hmm I'm a liar mmm-hmm I'm that now but I wasn't born that yeah I had to make myself into this [ __ ] it's amazing to me that this you know you won't accept it this way but like this military icon but not really like a social icon to like when people aspire to be tough and mentally tough I mean there are UFC fighters that when they win fights now quote you in their post conference interviews you I don't even know if you know that or not but like I watched it they're like Goggin says you know usually you know so that guy kind of bullshit's his way out of the military right like that's that's staggering and then that guy if you don't want me to jump in the head a little bit then that guy ends up kind of living in an apartment gains a ton of weight gets up to almost 300 pounds killing cockroaches as an exterminator this is just crazy where we're gonna go right now so and then what we're gonna go after that's even more bananas but go ahead jump back so it's funny that though so I got a pair of rescue so I go to a job called tak P just real quick about that if your great [ __ ] job with the best jobs in the military but I'm all poopy past now I'm not a rescue me something attacked peace some weak ass [ __ ] three tag P right del Toro is one of the best [ __ ] jobs in the world but my mind once again has me shackled not thinking I'm not a pair of rescue me so I'm like you know I'm tank P was a great job I had great friends in it and I did it pretty well hmm but I could have been so much better my mind was once again hijacking me so I get out in but from from the time from 1994 to 1999 or 1998 I go from 175 pounds to 297 not much education and four and a half years in military starts praying for cockroaches and uh making $1,000 a month and I've had eight hundred and $10 a partner so I'm scrounging dude and so my life is hard mm-hmm and but [ __ ] it I'm spraying for cockroaches for limb o'clock at night seven o'clock in the morning and that's my life but once again man you can't lie to yourself mm-hmm I can lie to you and I can about everybody else and I was great at it the buddy every [ __ ] day in that dirty mirror that accountability mirror was no more he [ __ ] out a kind of billion murder that's just [ __ ] shave my head and go to work but I saw my reflection every day but I really didn't know how fat I was I didn't even look at myself yeah but I was haunted these demons were in my head every day man you ain't [ __ ] man God dog and you wear this [ __ ] uniform you getting your [ __ ] Ecolab truck you gonna spray for cockroaches you [ __ ] go in the kitchens you eat your [ __ ] brownies and [ __ ] in the back kitchen you make shakes and [ __ ] while you're in there man it's like [ __ ] man so I come home and I never forget it I should spray down staking shake my last stop at about 6:30 at night or six during the morning that's when I was taking shake and they had this big large shake they they gave me a special cup and they just dumped the [ __ ] chocolate milkshake in there and I go across street to 7-eleven out of 45-minute commute home and I would be and I go over to 7-eleven and get these chocolate doughnuts like the mini hostess doughnuts now it's popping them like [ __ ] tic tacs it's like I eat it I just [ __ ] pop it boom this [ __ ] this be driving listen to radio popping them like tic tacs drinking the shake so there's so by the time I got home that box that darkness was gone my mom looked about two miles down the road cuz she moved teen apples Indiana now so what would happen is this so I would eat that and my routine was this [ __ ] you not my breakfast was not that mine that was my snack for my 45-mile my mom and this is no [ __ ] [ __ ] my breakfast no this [ __ ] Pillsbury cinnamon rolls here you got the five we got the eight yeah I had the eight so you had the eight she baked that [ __ ] and then it was seven to eight scrambled eggs hard and half a pound of bacon well-done and I would chase that [ __ ] down with fruity pebbles two balls or fruit Lee something sugary that was my breakfast after the [ __ ] doughnuts and the shank so this day though I get home call my mom up on the phone she goes you watch your staple I'm like hell yeah my [ __ ] steak you know that's not talked my mom you know me my mom killer some fucked-up [ __ ] yeah who I meant why you customers can my life wasn't easy sure something I said is it should record of right so my mom cusses at me because my mother a great relationship okay Greg come over and so at this time my routine was to come home turn the TV on listen to the TV like blare it cuz I clearly I had this big living room and my shower was like back down the hallway so I turn the TV on like blurry TV and kind of like listen to living as a shower I'm hearing Navy SEAL heard about him knew about him but now I want to come out and see the [ __ ] top I cover world's toughest so I come on and watch this documentary I come out I better see I have my towel and had my shake down on the under kind of heavens a little [ __ ] TV in his shoes she was living rooms I'm gonna TV I'm leaning forward and I'm watching this [ __ ] and it pretty much goes through first base second phase and third phase but they concentrate on Hill week but all I saw was the Pacific Ocean right watering it dude I saw nothing but water more water than pair rescue and these guys are like going from this big class - this wasn't quitting and I see nothing but this jackhammering guys it's not bubbles and just rolling around sugar cookies in on the surf and carries boats and laws I'm like [ __ ] that [ __ ] looks evil but guys as they quit I saw like their soul leaving their bodies I'm awesome on screen because this look came over and I imagined I remember myself back in Paris teachers I bet that's how I [ __ ] looked in front of that [ __ ] star Lumbergh and I bet he could see in my eyes that I was basically quitting he knew I was quitting he just gave me a medical I'm a [ __ ] knew it as a manly pay another man you know where the man's done and I'm like sorry I I thought about son I said I said I [ __ ] knew I was quick dude he's didn't he saved me and it won't tell me I was being ruined because I could look at somebody now it's okay dude you're good but I know you're quitting makes your [ __ ] knee or your back or whatever you're quitting he saw that in me and I said [ __ ] man so now I'm watching these guys go through training and it goes down to 22 guys were left and it was amazing how it ended because these words I don't know him exactly but it's in my book exactly and this commanding officers at graduation and he's 22 guys graduate buds SEAL training and his commanding officers and just whites he's up there some most skinny [ __ ] commander [ __ ] him but you could tell he's been through the [ __ ] salty looking [ __ ] he's looking hard and this in his speech was amazing he goes we live in a society where mediocrity is often rewarded he looked down at the 22 men and he says something about basically you all detest mediocrity and he goes on to talk about this mediocrity and [ __ ] and I just sat back and I said god man I just want to be like these [ __ ] I want to feel good now I was projecting myself in those chairs I wanted how can how do y'all feel hmm like right now yeah now I want to feel like you do you you 22min I want to feel like that man I said I'm tired of feeling the way I feel every day I'm tired of how I feel tired of lying and myself lying to people and this being some piece of [ __ ] and I always knew in the back of my mind I could be something special yes but I knew the work it was gonna take was gonna kill me I was afraid of that I was afraid of the brutality in the suffering I was gonna have to endure but I knew I knew I could do something mm-hmm but I'm like I ain't tryin to do that kind of work man you must not try to do this so I chose the path of the easy of least resistance so now my ideas it became so haunting and daunting on me myself okay that's it I'm done mm-hmm I'm [ __ ] done and I thought I fixed myself in the accountability mirror when my mom put the letter down on the bed ya know so now at this point I actually Drive back to Buffalo New York to see my dad haven't seen him in years I've not heard this party no one knows about this I didn't put this in the book even so because before I started this journey to be a Navy SEAL I go back to see my dad because I realize now I gotta fix some [ __ ] I'm blaming everything I got going back know how a lot of times like if you're a runner you're your right knee may hurt but not you right knee that hurts is where you left hit yes but we're confident on the right knee I'm concentrating all my [ __ ] but I need to go back to the root of the problem which is my dad I got faced a demon I got to go back and see what made him so [ __ ] up to make me so [ __ ] that why am I [ __ ] up mm-hmm so I go back and I and I go back as an older man now I'm in my 20s I'm not a kid anymore and I want to see this man and face him as a as a as a grown man but still as a kid in my head I'm still a kid I was a grown man as my age and went back and I realized he was the same man that he was still same still the same and I talked to him he was still nuts and bad to go back and face that one more time but to face it in a different way how'd you do it different I looked at him in a way we never said sorry to one another and he went off on my mom and my grandparents and all kind of [ __ ] but looked at in a way that I realized now why you [ __ ] us up I had to almost be him to realize it's okay brother it's okay cuz I realize that somewhere on your [ __ ] life something [ __ ] you up and you didn't deal with it and so you put that [ __ ] on me my mom and everybody around you I'm gonna deal with my [ __ ] so even though you gave me all this [ __ ] you you gave me a satchel of [ __ ] that I didn't deserve and I'm all [ __ ] up and people think I'm a [ __ ] liar and I'm all [ __ ] up you gave me this you created this [ __ ] nightmare of Goggins hmm I'm gonna fix it though so now I get it I look at this one say in my head and my favorite thing you've ever said right now but I love all of it but that's my favorite thing I've never heard that I want to fix it now so I must take it I take all this [ __ ] it's mine I'm gonna fix all this [ __ ] I don't know to fix [ __ ] people want to find peace immediately and this is where people don't like me I don't believe that [ __ ] mmm-hmm you can find it through [ __ ] yoga and all sort of [ __ ] I stretched out a lot and I believe in yoga you're always great but you ain't gonna find it in some [ __ ] room mm-hmm you're gonna find peace from going to war with yourself can we all got [ __ ] we all got [ __ ] people look at me the reason why my story resonates in people because I don't hide I'll tell you exactly the [ __ ] I am I would've meant to it people are great at hiding mm-hmm so they wanted us find peace no you got you got to take your [ __ ] fix mirrors [ __ ] up in you don't just shove it on the rug fix it and then you'll find some peace later after you fixed some [ __ ] so now I'm realizing this I go home several months go by and now I'm like okay here we guard it's time to be a Navy SEAL I start calling these [ __ ] recruiters man and when you two are nine seven pounds and you have prior serviceman recruiters laugh at your ass dude right and you're not you're not twenty-two years old before right and so I'm fat I'm out of shape and I know this and so I found it after two weeks of karma cruise I found this kind of Steven Sal Joe and Steve and Sal Joe says come on in the office mm-hmm I walk in the office he looks at me and he's the first recruit I say you know what am your big [ __ ] dude man he won't be a seal I said yeah but he didn't give me the look of like you can't do it he gave me looking let's go away yet he waved me to 97 he went through his little chart started writing all this [ __ ] down and he said uh you got a lofty lofty task ahead of you you know why he goes well this program that I was trying to get into college I was in the reserves and I was gonna go from the Reserve Program to an active duty steel so this program was shutting down mm-hm and I was gonna be in the last class like one or two classes left before I shut down so I had about three months to get the wait stick a hundred pounds of 306 pounds so the standard for a six foot one person back then six foot six foot when I forget was it was 191 okay and I was 297 so I pretty much said [ __ ] this this pretty much can't work for me man this is impossible so go back to work spraying for cockroach and hit the motherlode like I [ __ ] I I hit the mother lode of cockroaches rodents and everything and I go out to the to the dumpster and these animals I was like [ __ ] I got done mmm so I quit my job right then actually the boss had to come to my I quit the boss had to come looking for me to get the truck back I left work so he gonna come to my house okay how do you just go to work again so all these restaurants I had the keys to mall the [ __ ] alarm codes all the keys were in the [ __ ] truck they like he had to come by and locking my door and say but but he brought some friends and Kaltura nice and passive right big dude I need something right later dude I'm out and so I had now started my journey and so now like I'm losing the [ __ ] weight but my first run was four miles that's what you had to run that day on your plan that's my plan as I'm driving the truck back home from quitting my job I'm literally I Drive home I get my shoes on and I run a quarter mile come home crying you stopped after quarter-mile yeah walk back home because I was exhausted okay you're still I'm running like years you're sucking down yeah I'm Rebecca knows 175 yeah run was easy I was where the fasteners in class but now it's just hard man fat I'm on a shape and I was just defeated cuz now I was 175 I wasn't good shape and I got myself into a bigger hole now yeah and now I have to now I gotta lose this way and I got think the ads that begin to get in the Navy so I gotta take that flush I took that [ __ ] two more times because the first time I passed it but I had to get a fifty on mechanical comprehend so there's like ten different sets had to get a fifty I got a 44 you're going to get a waiver for five points also I had to take it again and guess what happened it's in the book really well is that what happened I take the ASVAB test and I took it and now they have computers back when I took it the first time it's like all like scantron [ __ ] yeah so now I see a computer so now I'm freaking out oh my gosh on the computer so I take it and the sergeant in charge of the ASVAB test isn't supposed to tell you what you got so I take it for my second time in my last time they're like let me take it again so I'm now down to 215 pounds I'm losing the weight but not take that test for the second time to get the navy as I leave I get out to my car and I'm like this is my life now I got fun test kit takes two days to get the results back but they get them immediately once once you gets in that that guy gets it right there so I'm like [ __ ] that man I go back in I go hey man can you please mm-hmm yes man this is [ __ ] military protocol I'm not breaking it for you I'm like people are still taking the [ __ ] test I'm like crying my man you understand what I've been through my like this is my life please I'm begging this guy please let me know what I got so he scrolls through and sees David guys you got 65 I'll go great I don't care about that canticle thousand overall score I'm going would I get a mechanical he goes you're asking a lot for me man I go please man like I have to get a 50 on mechanical he Scrolls over I got exactly a 50 uh have you seen The Pursuit of Happyness how's that [ __ ] when he runs the stairs he gets a job and like like your hair stands on the back your neck is he worked so hard to get the [ __ ] when I left that as Bab and it's nighttime and get in my car it felt like that did it something came out it felt I truly a cop you know I passed it before but now I know I'm all in that's good for me to hear for people to hear cuz I have a hard time picturing you celebrating anything and so that's good to hear that something that of all the things you've accomplished you celebrated that it was funny mmm I haven't celebrated since then because I needed that to start the war without that the celebration was I can start the war now it wasn't that I won the war I can start my war that's what made me so I've been celebrated since I'm always in that battle yeah I have peace about in this battle every [ __ ] day so I got 250 I can start war now I'm down to 215 I have about another month to go or whatever it is to [ __ ] lose the weight I dropped the weight I'm in SEAL training now the war now can begin well and it does and the war begins but I gotta tell you it has to be a movie because I'm listening to you it has to be a movie like the book by the way the book everybody you have to get the book ok you I'm telling you I read it in a day and but now hearing you live and hearing some of the things that weren't in there it's moving to me because now then this is just the very beginning of the war too so so this man loses chapter 3 right now yeah this guy sucks down steak Shack shakes and doughnuts and fruity pebbles or whatever the hell it was and all the stuff mom's making you it's amazing - I think a little lesson in there David is you had all these times where you thought now I've changed and that's important for people to hear - cuz I've had that - okay now I got it now I'm on it now and even seeing your dad even the dad thing that was a breakthrough but then even after that it was like it took the damn frickin cockroaches and rodents to flip you and then even after that you run the quarter mile come home crying to yourself right so it's all these things like I think every one things like they're just gonna be this defining moment period where everything changes that's the movie that's and that's the move and it's not real was it I've never had I've had moments but it's never been like that was it and I've never been the same again this is life yeah and that's what I talk about man like like life is not a movie mmm it's not a movie where you have one breakthrough and like you just taking off mm-hm no man didn't even do a hell week three times yeah so why how that happened was once again this is where the war really began okay so now I'm in still training and I'm like almost in all because I'm like my god I'm around the baddest mental planet from what I thought back then but once you are able to get in the doors you realize who this [ __ ] men and that's what I realized okay this is good for me to see man they're [ __ ] like me hmm I had to work a little hard to get here but now that I'm on the same plane for the same let's [ __ ] go to war guys so how it happened was there was a guy there at that the command officer of buzz was captain Bowen he was an old crusty Vietnam vet and he had a different way of doing [ __ ] and basically no matter where you're at in training if you failed something he was gonna roll you back to day one week one we had guys who were two weeks from graduation six-month program that got rolled back to day one week one they didn't have to go through hell week again but they got rolled back to phase one day one a phase one but not but but this kids hell week for me I got rolled back in first phase three times first phase where Hovick is at and how it happened was since I was a reservist that also [ __ ] me okay so I had that double [ __ ] on my ass so basically hell week was I think the third or fourth week when I was going through and it starts on Sunday ends on Friday I get there and I had [ __ ] ups transplants stress fractures double pneumonia so I get rolled back to day one week one and I got start hell week again I didn't complete that hell week so now I get to my second class they one week when I'm going through I get through hell week happiest [ __ ] but when I was in hell week I actually broke my kneecap now I'm thinking I'm not getting rolled again dude and I really talk about this really good in the book but I was going through the highlights here so I'm toughing it out like I'm not gay I'm gonna go through buds with the [ __ ] broken knee and my stress fractures are all [ __ ] fire mm-hmm but I'm going through so now I have to do this we had this knot tying test after after hell week and you got tread water and when your tread with the broken kneecap and I'm negative buoyant so I'm using everything to stay up yeah go down and tie your knots my kneecap is going in and out and I'm like [ __ ] Sony I'll talk about this in the book so now I'm up on the pool deck and I talked about it good whatever but here we are now I realize now I can't get to this like my knee now from that pool session is like [ __ ] a basketball so I realized I go back they x-ray and say look man your says done your patella is done so I now go in to captain Bowen and I don't wanna get rolled again and captain Bowen looks at me and says basically we're gonna let you come back captain Bowen and another guy they said other guy that I don't even mention coming once we're missing them if it wasn't for this guy I won't miss I wouldn't miss his name so bad you know I'm talking about I want to miss his name so bad he actually talked to him a couple months ago this is a guy that made this happen he broke rules I believe to make this happen okay God wasn't supposed to come back for a third time like this is like inhumane in one year going another hell week so I'm sitting in front of captain Bowen and Kathryn bones I look man we're good let you come back in class 2:35 this class 231 with a broken kneecap look it up man like you don't that's not a lot of time I'm thinking so this was in May I classed up again in January I have stress fractures stress fractures don't heal that quick man especially when you beat him up so I have that much time to heal and that's it my last time to go through the Navy SEAL training so I come back and I'm now on my third hell we had a guy dying my third hell week from pulmonary edema as you know San Diego gets [ __ ] cold especially in February March that water temperature the Pacific is never warm in a dying so I get to it's a week helic ended on Thursday morning because he died okay so in about 30 hours early but what happened with me was as I said help me starts on Sunday usually you don't swell up until about Wednesday my body said oh [ __ ] man we're back hmm on Monday 24 hours into it man I'm the Pillsbury Doughboy my stress fractures my I'm blown up so I'm going through hell week like [ __ ] done but I'm like I can't quit it's my last time going through I can't get rolled so I get through hell week and this is where the [ __ ] gets [ __ ] evil man this is where I start to click into something we you when your mind this is just this whole forty percent rule [ __ ] I talk about all the time then I made up a long time ago now I started making it up through pain tell what that is what you go so basically the 40% rule is I am a strong believer that we quick is why how the [ __ ] does a 297 pounds guy right who quit on everything is now considered when the bass man of the planet how is that possible it means I had to change one thing my mindset yeah so there's no way in hell that that was in but that was that guy was in the mmm-hmm well that God came down here and said hey guess what man you're a fat ass but I will now make you a badass I want a miracle this [ __ ] to be a badass no it was in me I had you believe to make that belief work and you hard work I did that mmm so the 40% rule was like we have a like a car some cars have a governor on it and when you gets like 92 miles an hour that car start doing this because you can't go any faster here those cars that don't have governors are like it's like a fast ass whatever course whatever I'm gonna [ __ ] bury it gone we have that ability this but we have put this governor on our minds and you have to the factory that put the governor on that car the factories now you that put this shutting your [ __ ] mind you gotta take that [ __ ] off until you take it off you're gonna constantly get to 92 miles an hour and do this because you grow faster in my fight you might even go slower so basically I started realizing this through my life through going through all these times so now I get to hell week we ended like 30 hours early and now we're in walk week after you get through a week you have walk week and walk week is when you do basically this walking around to heal up your body and I walk week in the early because the instructors were pissed off a guy dies but there's trucks are mad that we didn't finish it okay he'll be but I already had a complete hell week already of course teller I don't do one already so now I'm sitting thinking man I went through [ __ ] one half of these not have like two and a half these [ __ ] and now I'm getting my ass kicked because now they're struck as a man to our class and they're complete of four week and like through like getting the pass they said Roger that they should walk week down on like Tuesday so everybody that was injured because the helmet was very different than most of them they had us on her feet the whole time rucking do nothing but rocking in and out of water it was brutal so it was a much harder hitting the other ones I was innocent so anyway my legs are broken I'm saying how the [ __ ] now there's no walk week I can't heal so my idea was this I'm going to leave my house early Kyle it off base and I left early I got to my dive cage where we had duct tape so I put my black sock on about 4 o'clock in the morning put a black sock on and ideals I got duct tape so you know whenever you move your ankle and it causes your shin to hurt if you have any issue up here so what I did was I casted with duct tape so I put the duct tape over the sock and so that sort of sock kind of protected it to give a little cushion I duct taping as tight as I could and right here at the pivot point it created a huge pressure ulcer because your ankle still wants to move so that tape would just dig in there so I did that every single day because my stress fractures were just killing me so I ran pretty much for the first 45 minutes and most excruciating pain on life and so but basically it to 45 minutes my legs would go numb it when they go numb you don't feel this [ __ ] anymore so I wouldn't do buds like this so now the fucked-up thing about my gosh as I get the third phase and for some reason man I healed my stress fractures and I took this day I haven't had him ever since but I literally from running and I'm not saying don't do this mm-hm but people go how'd you get through it by the time I got the third phase which is like maybe three and a half months later when I wasn't a third phase my stress fractures were healing that's crazy and I ran on him if he was saying was the shin splints no muffler I had x-rays mm-hm they were breaks in my legs so as I'm not saying do that yeah but because it's very painful well most people are willing to go to a point where they get their body to the point where it gets numb right did you were people say why did you do that is either that or not become a Navy SEAL do you think can I ask you a question about Navy SEALs I'm just curious keep into three whole weeks which is as you hear this it's just it's bananas do you do you know do you have any insight what the difference is for someone who finishes and doesn't because I heard you say I respect guys who didn't finish it - right so is there some separators that your blood just go away when the pain happens or what is it there's only one separated man and in anybody not just Navy says but anybody that can accomplish anything that is hard the other separator is is that they really want to be there there's some people that get inspired and that inspiration moves them to try to do something but the inspiration is very high right now in this nice environment we're in a nice environment the oceans out there I'm talking to you if I want to go to the [ __ ] refrigerator and get something to drink eat I can i watch the movie about some badasses you're inspired but the second you're not in this environment mm-hmm and you're actually doing what inspired you that suck factor is not real you can't just get off your [ __ ] couch and get a [ __ ] shake or get a [ __ ] box of doughnuts or turn the TV or go take a [ __ ] or piss or go go get your girlfriend a cup numb your now there and only those people who have been there a million times in their minds and have lived in that water and have suffered a million times and realized my legs may break my knee may break my bones will hurt I will be the coldest I've been in my life I will be miserable and accept that because what happens is we when you get in a horrible situation in life your mind I caught my one second decision you can have up a situation in life your mind in melee says get the [ __ ] out of here everybody does even you want to be there but it starts to have all these different questions in your mind that one second it says okay why are you here why are you doing why this why that and then you start to say yourself if you don't want to be there that bad not a beautiful wife at home and why the [ __ ] am i doing this many like this is stupid this is go get these guys injured like like they're gonna pay for this for the rest of their lives I'm not gonna break my body up to do this your mind starts to say yeah this is stupid mm-hmm but if you have if you are already knowing that this is gonna happen to you you have all the answers to these questions that your mind starts to give you when you're in Suffern mode yeah and that's what I realize you true that's your visualization of those moments over and over over and over again you have to be there over but not there at the graduation okay you gotta be there in the worst and the suffering that you know over and over again you gotta live that in your mind do you like suffering or do you just deal with suffering real answer no answer yeah I like to see real answer I like to get a bunch of men together okay men mm-hmm that are the hardest of the hard mm-hmm and I want to be with these men and I want to see them suffer because I'm suffering right along with you but I want to see me get through it I want to see what you're made of I want to see like almost like the Coliseum mm-hmm in Rome mm-hmm let's [ __ ] go to the [ __ ] Colosseum and the only way to see who the baddest [ __ ] is is to suffer you can't do it by writing the paper so let's go because why would I found out through my life was I thought of myself as some weak little [ __ ] kid and when I found out in the only message I'm gonna get across to people is once you change one thing your mindset you can attack everything and I find it fascinating I'm fascinated because I'll be in these moments I put these guys on some [ __ ] pedestal yeah which Peale do with you they do with me and they sure and I was this guy who was a piece of [ __ ] look at this guy got how are you guys it's amazing but once I worked my way up there I said my god man we can all compete [ __ ] mmm let's go so do I like suffering I like suffering in the way that is competitive yeah that brings out the absolute best in me and in everybody else mm-hmm so like I want to see a man be defeated I want to see a man get broken and say [ __ ] you I love these men mm-hmm these men I love but there's very few of them mm-hmm there's very few of them and there's very few that are willing to go there more than once mm-hmm a lot of people even people who've gone through Special Ops mm-hmm it kicks the [ __ ] out of them to a point we're in their mind what got me bad and pararescue was when I was going through it I said only go do this one time and so many people in Special Ops where they believe it or not in anything [ __ ] special ops anything that's hard I'm only doing this one time mm-hmm once you say that you [ __ ] yourself the truth I got to tell you off camera you and I are talking about something now we're gonna go to something cool okay well we've been in something cool but like I work with a lot of athletes and I get out of their career they made this massive sacrifice all their life to get to the NFL they make that thing happen they're only willing to do it once right and when that's over their identities set on that thing forever and they just repeat the stories from that time over and old right and I watch them have such a difficult second half of their life I try to help them with that I've watched it with my business people and you and I were talking off-camera so I've started to uncover with me the last couple years that I've been on social media and teaching these things and if you gave me that mirror test the last couple years right that accountability mirror when I look in it I'm starting to look at a dude who used to do some crazy [ __ ] that was cool in his life really accomplished some things and all these accolades people follow you they listen to you they they think you something special you have that I have that clearly the differences in our lives are too vast to even mention what you've achieved the things you've overcome are completely different than mine but I'm starting to realize something about myself that I want to give the audience a gift of and I want you to talk about it you know what I've just accepted I'm only gonna be happy when I'm grinding for something so I'm only gonna be happy when I'm growing I don't want to talk about stuff I used to do mm-hmm I I want to do something great with my life I don't know that I can get to the mental level you have but I think everybody here needs to know something if you just think you're gonna do something temporarily once man you're gonna be unhappy when it's over right how about you right now when you look in the mirror right now so Goggins looks in the accounting Miller mirror today what does he see and what are your thoughts about that so say with you mm-hmm what happened with me was like so who I was I was just nobody guy mm-hmm and I created this Goggins mm-hmm and that Goggins there's David Goggin Xander's Goggins David Goggins is a calm cool guy that sits back used to be a you know weak kid now he's just a normal guy Goggins is a guy that is willing to tape up his legs to go after it in that book you read about David Goggins and also Goggins what I realized in my life is that Goggins is who I love Goggins is who I created my dad created David Goggins I created Goggins so what's happening with me and since can't hurt me came out and since I got on social media listening don't like social me was when I'm not on there very much was I give people one time I have to do me mm-hmm I have to do me so people get it [ __ ] twisted man I am Who I am yeah was in that book is me so now what they see is this guy who's trying to get people to get off their [ __ ] ass that just happened to happen mmm-hmm I didn't sit out when I sent out to be a [ __ ] seal and set out to go to Ranger School and all this or should I did and break records I didn't set out to [ __ ] please [ __ ] right I didn't set out to say hey pay me now I got a great [ __ ] story mm-hmm [ __ ] that mm-hmm and I realize now that my life has kind of gotten to a point where people know me how followers and whatnot the biggest depression of my life is you get caught up in to helping so many people out and it's great and I love that but you lose yourself in all of that [ __ ] it literally and people go man butBut my count like you're changing I get all that [ __ ] man but what the [ __ ] is motivating you in that book what's motivating you as the [ __ ] stories I'm telling you about what I did in my life once I stopped living that I'm no more yes I am NOT the [ __ ] that you are now being motivated from so right now in the mirror I now got back to Goggins mm-hmm I'm now back to running 100 miles a week I'm not back to getting the [ __ ] I saw and I talked to my girl about all the time you you travel you speak you you know you eat all this [ __ ] me it's all [ __ ] great and dandy for some for most people I'm Goggins but what makes me me is the dungeon and yeah and people that walk oh my god they they're good here's my god did you don't have any peace Neela don't get it [ __ ] twisted weak people who hear me get all [ __ ] poopypants about how I talk so be it what changed me was I had to be hard on myself yep and I have to continue to grind myself into a fine dust period that's where I feel good like I accomplished something and things come easy it's not fun I must fail at something repeatedly it has to haunt me and then once I complete it I [ __ ] I accomplished something here I don't want to set out and say oh there's an a we're good just [ __ ] stupid no I want to turn into me calmness that you fail you fail that's okay Roger that mm-hmm and sit there and analyze what I'm doing wrong go to these places that people don't go to anymore because all this [ __ ] social media [ __ ] and everything is computerized I want to go to that dark place my mind so okay how are we gonna get this done I think people the right people are happy when they're challenged by something like when they're pursuing something when they're challenged like when there's when they're not where they could be right where they're when they're not who they could be and you and I were talking of this off-camera it's like I just want everybody to understand this is this is from two people who are sort of in the space we love helping but we love making a difference but what makes us make a difference is the is the the pursuit of who we've been becoming these challenges you and in all the different ways you have anime in my way and in millions of people in their way to like I don't want people think I just want to get to a place and cool it because we you get to that place and cool it I think you're gonna be miserable you've got to still find somewhere and I want to kind of go in your head a little bit because I've not lived this a very few people have lived this it I want to take you back there for a minute and then at the end I want to ask you what that thing looks like next for you but so this whole thing that you did you get out where I can't come over the whole military thing cuz I want them to read the book right but then you're like hey you really never done any of this before but this is sort of the formula what we're talking about then then the military thing ends and then you like yeah I'm gonna go like run I'm gonna do the bad water 135 my cardio was 20 minutes every Sunday on the elliptical trainer okay now is it so I'm looking all these different races and one comes up number one the hardest race in the world bad water 135 hundred thirty-five mile race through Death Valley I'm like that sounds [ __ ] nice but I did but it didn't describe that it was a like a couple day race I'm thinking okay that has to be like a [ __ ] seven day race because I don't know people run like that so I end up calling Chris Kaufman up Chris Collins the race director of bad water and he lives out here in California he's like hey man I'm like hey Chris I called him up in the first conversation I actually have all the emails in my book yeah for me I'm going back he's a [ __ ] stickler Manitou tell you that so I call my PI said hey man we'll do this race it's like have you ever run a hundred miles before I'm like no he was going to get my race you have to do 100-mile race and you gotta do 100 miles in 24 hours or less there's only two more races I could do before the deadline dropped and so I'm like he goes you live in San Diego right I'm like yeah this was Wednesday I call him up on a Wednesday morning he goes well there's a race on Saturday mm-hmm and it's a it's called the San Diego one day at hospitality point in San Diego where you run around a one-mile track for 24 hours and semi miles you can get so much [ __ ] mess guys kind of calling me out I'm gonna get this [ __ ] done I'm a seal I'm the badass been through Ranger School and [ __ ] I got this hardest thing I did my entire life dude was this one race so I go harder than getting through hell yeah I was not prepared okay at all so I go I sign up for the race I show up I'm this big bodybuilder looking guy shirt off black hat on you know and I'm I set out so every mile unless he's blue lawn chair I had rich crackers in my out flicks that was my [ __ ] nutrition man no water no not just like my old water no I'm on I [ __ ] you know I never drink water on runs and [ __ ] I [ __ ] didn't know about all this [ __ ] so I go out there I'm running I get through 50 miles I'm gonna cut to the chase cuz I did kill it really well my book I get going I sit down at Mile 70 and buddy I haven't sat down yet I sit down and everything falls the [ __ ] apart literally man I'm like peeing blood down my leg I have some crap coming out of me and I got thirty [ __ ] miles to go and I'm in the worst shape in my entire life and so I won't get too deep into it man but I ended up going back through my cookie jar and I talked about you know about my cookie jars Basie something I invented about we forget how badass we are when we're suffering because our mind it stays right there and suffering the cookie jars a reminder hmm you know how your mom needs to have the cookie jar you know you know what cookie gonna get but it may be over raised and maybe chocolate chocolate chip me because you know she's done something that motherfucker's grab one and go so my cookie jars the things I've accomplished they all that didn't fail that just just kept on grinding through so I take this one second I calm down so I realized okay man I got to be able to just stand up first come all dizzy and lightheaded now go through this process and I said I might quit but not yet yeah I'll go this is worth saving life so I said I might quit because when you're not gonna quit something he had 30 miles to go your mind spasm like I'm [ __ ] up like I like 30 miles a long way to go just fresh mm-hmm I've already gone 70 I'm a more set in my life I'm like okay so I'm giving my mind some space because if you don't give it space it's just gonna freak out some like you know I'm gonna quit but let me just sit here for a second and drink some water now now I'm drinking water I have my crew going over to get some [ __ ] you know nutrition so we need some food for me I'm getting better so now I stand up like wow maybe we stand up now because I wasn't able to I was all lightheaded then I'm gonna love this track and I get tomorrow 81 and I wasn't gonna make the time to I was moving slow behind time way behind and this is a this is a craziest thing in the world and I [ __ ] [ __ ] you not I'm in the worst shape my entire life ever I've never even been close to this again never mount a t1 I'm not gonna make the time as long as I was moving and when your body in mind connect I think this is the only time I've ever done this okay you become a cyborg hmm I end up running 20 miles at about a 10 15 mile and get done with that race I did 100 miles in 19 hours and six minutes and to this day and I don't and I will detail it well with you but in the book I do I learned more from that 19 hours and six minutes didn't I did in all three Hill weeks Ranger School and this is months Ranger School was sixty something days hell week and in all the buds is six months I was in I was in bust for like 18 months mmm you know I went to Delta for selection twice you know pull-up breakers I'll learn more in that one race that I wasn't prepared for that 19 hours brought me from utter misery happiness failure success depression I went to every [ __ ] emotion in the world in nineteen hours you should hear how the race ended mmm then I really took a [ __ ] on my cell like I got in that blue chair in the race ended and I literally it just was over I was in the worst shape of my life I got in the tub and they put the shower or she put the shower on me the showers hit me as I'm laying in the tub in the fetal position and what came out of me looked like dirt as I'm penis it's not even blood this is dark brown dirt and I'm sitting there and my she calls my mom and my mom has a doctor friend over her house and this guy's when the best doctors in the country and he's like unique came to the doctor now so I'm about to tell you he's gonna [ __ ] you up so I'm sitting there and I think I'm I think I'm gonna die and we're sitting my life and I'm in this tub and I'm jackhammering in this in and this hot water hitting me and I'm literally in the worst pain my shins my feet I'm broken and I'm gonna sitting I'm cramping up and she said we get to the doctor you know your mom's worried I'm worried about like the the I even never since for my life and I go I'm not going anywhere I want to sit here and enjoy this pain and and I and I know the listeners here in this gonna say man you're a [ __ ] nut no I'm not when I got a chance to experience in that 19 hours and six minutes of my life was something I didn't want any painkillers I this was proof positive what I was feeling is what I just did I I did something without training without coaching without a cheering staff without any knowledge I took a raw human being with no training whatsoever put him out in the condition and just through this alone mmm got through it and I sat there and I was like this is it was the best feeling I've ever had and will ever have in my entire I was in the worst pain in my life it was the best feeling I ever had in my life not because the pain I was in by the pain was confirmation of my god did I just do that and I had completed hell we said but that right there was like don't take this from me man and and it was confirmation proof positive that this young kid that came from [ __ ] that wasn't [ __ ] that lied and cheated for I was now the truth god I was now the truth I was a Navy SEAL I went to Army Ranger school as honor man I went through all this [ __ ] I I was truth hmm I became truth there was no more lie and was funny about all that it is the people in my life who were in my life when I was bad and I called it that wasn't bad mm-hmm I had a [ __ ] up way to go man they wanna they're still out there and it was a [ __ ] I'm saying I need to drop names on them they want to take me back there they're mad that I'm here yes then wouldn't still make me out to be what I was they don't like the fact that there's still where the [ __ ] they're at that's right they hate that so on this journey in life there's a lot of people who are [ __ ] up right now on the journeys always be that [ __ ] in the sewer came from that's grabbing at your [ __ ] ankle as you're leaving that sewer guys want to drag you right the [ __ ] back down because you figured it out they're not willing to figure it out there's nothing much to figure out the only thing to figure out is this and everybody has a different equation mmm my equation is different than yours my equation was very different than most people's hmm and it's not about being sadistic it was just about that that right there was kind of like the moment of my life where I realized I don't like to say that I've arrived hmm because you never would have that I've arrived mentality could you stop but that was the moment that I realized that I was the truth man I've done a lot of shows but I don't go back and watch them that much you know I'll watch them a couple times when we do them I'll go back and watch and listen to this last 10 or 15 minutes of we talked about several hundred times that's the most incredible thing I've heard I just tell you straight up that's the most incredible beautiful magnificent thing I've heard since I've been doing the show thank you for me for that I appreciate that oh that's just silly crazy awesome I want to finish on the light note okay I was saving this for the end because it's just ironic so I'm a rocky fan oh but this is gonna trip you out I actually got chills I was reading about you in prepping because I've known about you for a long time and like I gotta have something in common with this dude right I gotta have something to come with him and so sli's a friend of mine too now which is really weird but I'm a Rocky fan but I'm really a rocky one fan but not only am i Araki one fan I've watched the fourteenth round see now my children come yeah I've watched the 14th round of the Rocky one movie I venture to say I can't count them but it's got to be more than a thousand times in my life and so when I was a little boy and all the turmoil in my life and the dysfunction in my family the things I wanted to achieve I learned to visualize in my life by watching rocky that was my visualization the fitness part the training the overcome and stuff there's just this little part of me that's like a little mini rocky in there it's why I love working out it's and for me it was the way he would take punishment it's at the end of the 14th when he goes cut me Mick and Mick cuts him right so they're gonna think we're both just crazy but what have you watched that a couple times and and what if what did it do for you I just want to finish on this cuz like this taught me to visualize and dream there were no my family's not like years but there's no dreaming or visualizations or motivation or go do something special it was nothing like that in my house I had rocky and mainly rocky one I love them all but like the rocky 3 running on the beach seen all that but rocky one 14th round at least a thousand times what about you no [ __ ] at least 20,000 why is that yes I've dissected that two minutes in some seconds two minutes and 13 14 15 seconds at least 20,000 times when I did the pull-up record and I finally broke it took you three times yep did 4030 in 17 hours I listened to one song for 17 hours and it was going the distance 2 minutes and 13 something for 14 seconds on a loop on a loop but first the guy has gotten a man and or he kept playing out loud for everybody and I brought my own little iPad I don't ever listen to music but I was failing so many times at this record I had to go to that place so I said no I don't want to bore you anymore with this same song cuz I had a crew of people there filming it you know because I had to be documented mm-hmm so I didn't want them to be there for 17 hours this is the same song kind of it born so I put in my ears this is the whole time but I'm gonna step further in that round when rocky gets knocked down and Micky saying stay down stay down and he's getting up Apollo Creed things that he'd knocked him out so I have this thing called taking souls okay and when you see Apollo Creed turns around arms in the air I [ __ ] got him do you see when he turns around and he sees because he Apollo Creed knows I was [ __ ] this dude up he kept coming after me and I finally knocked him down when he turns around and looks at rocky him and he says in Watsons and get up and rocky gets his gloves and Moses him to come to him yes Apollo puts his head down and just goes like this it's not so much Rocky getting up that's big for me Apollo Creed's face became every [ __ ] that verbally and non-verbally looked at me cuz you know that look they give you when you think that you know they may not tell you your piece of [ __ ] and you're nobody but look at you almost like you poor thing I got them all I got them all on that [ __ ] of that that that little wheel you have art with everybody's name on it and phone numbers of [ __ ] I got my own that my [ __ ] my head not spitting that [ __ ] to every [ __ ] game and I know right now whether you hate me love me I'm a [ __ ] dick I'm a dear some of that whenever you want to think I made it and I know all of you [ __ ] are looking just like Apollo Creed did because I just kept getting the [ __ ] up and all I wanted people to do in my life I'd give us a [ __ ] money I don't care about the [ __ ] fame I care if you I care about all my followers go away tomorrow I wanted a lot of people that doubted me to look like a Pollock redid in that 14th round because I got back up repeatedly and when you keep on getting back up like that no matter how strong the person is just beating the [ __ ] out of you they eventually look at you and say you know what I'm tired and I just want people to be tired just be tired I want to make you tired because I just continue so that's what that movie did to me that that movie changed how I looked at life me too it did me too I'm blown away because the part of the scene thank you the part of the scene anybody that knows me real well all my life I wanted people to give me that he gives him that like what what are you what the hell and I wanted whether it was a coach or dudes I grew up with or whatever it was a point just go what are you that's it and and I got to tell you I don't do that with a lot of people I do that with you like and I'm tremendous amount of respect for you thank you and I'm proud to know you now well I really appreciate that and I didn't want to win I still don't want to win for some reason I don't care about winning for some I just want to go to distance and that's a true story man and so it's uh it's a powerful movie man but thank you for your kind words what he says I'm very humbled by that yeah I'm looking forward to seeing what the next thing is for you and I really am because this is nowhere near the distance right you're nowhere near right and so I'm really excited if I can ever help with any of it I'm certainly here for you as a friend I appreciate me I'm a big faith believing man even though people look at my mouth and say how can you believe in God I'm sorry man we live in earth mm-hmm and sometimes life is [ __ ] hard sure you don't mean don't believe in [ __ ] but I know for a fact that's [ __ ] up as my life has been to be where I'm at today there's obviously more I'm obviously a [ __ ] messenger of some sort because I don't fit the mold man I'm obviously a messenger so all your lights were preparing you for this moment I'm excited for the next one I believe that thank you for today Thank You Man appreciate bless your meeting you thank you everybody I don't have any words you heard it or saw it and so I know your life was moved you know all I ask you to do is share this show with somebody that you care about somebody you believe in somebody that you want to see wind reminder every day on Instagram they're on the max out two-minute drill you get a chance to engage with me there's three ways to win you make a comment on a post you make a comment on a comment or you post it you make a comment any time of day you when coaching calls with me my guests ride on the jet deer tickets to see me speak whatever you want I want to engage with you closer please do that god bless you and continue to max out your life hey guys thanks for sticking around if you'd like more click the videos right here they're exactly what you need to see next and if you're new here hit subscribe and become a part of a maxout community and tell me what you think about the videos in the comments below I read all of them every week and I select winners to get all kinds of prizes gear coaching calls with me make a comment [Music]

Channel: Ed Mylett

Views: 1,289,569

Rating: 4.9233952 out of 5

Keywords: ed mylett, mylett, david goggins, david goggins interview, david goggins motivation, how to end suffering, how to be stronger, happiness and suffering, win the war in your head, win the war in your mind, breaking the barriers of your mind, face yourself, face your demons, find peace, find peace within yourself, break mental barriers, break mental blocks, strongest man alive, be uncomfortable everyday of your life, overthink

Id: GdHW1YipmVo

Length: 85min 50sec (5150 seconds)

Published: Tue Jul 30 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/pmjeff]

I expected a way better interview from Ed rather then him having David basically reiterate his stories. Don’t get me wrong I love ANY exposure that David gets but I expected way more from this pod.