When English Is Your First And Second Language. Vien Phommachanh

school was weird for me I had to take English as a second language classes I struggled in these classes because I only spoke English I wish that wasn't true I went to a school with a bunch of immigrant kids they didn't know what to do with me the teachers are like what do we do with the Asian kid who speaks English yeah they decided let's just put it with the others so English is now my first and second language I didn't complain if you speak English that class is really easy yeah I got a C nailed it my parents raised us American I'm not very Asian at all I don't even like going to Asian restaurants Asian waiters don't like me they can sense that I'm a traitor my wife took there's a Vietnamese restaurant we sit down the Vietnamese guy comes by I'm just like hey can I have a Coke he was so rude cuz he didn't work there I don't know why I did this this happens to every Asian person in an Asian restaurant they think you were it's happened to me before okay he was mad he's like why don't you get me a Coke it became this really weird scene like two Asian guys yelling at each other like in a Vietnamese restaurant it was like a weird racist Friendly Fire standoff everybody in the restaurant's looking at us now I heard someone go why are the waiters arguing is there going to be Kung Fu Fighting I'm from a big family there was 10 of us this is typical for Le oceans we have big families most of my friends are American they all have two kids they can't relate to this at all they love and spoil those two kids they're always like how did your parents deal with 10 kids Le oans deal with 10 kids the same way you guys deal with twoo they love and spoil two of [Music] them it's like a basketball team there's two stars right six kids are role players they defend in rebound and two kids never come off the bench they're afraid you're going to trade him to another team so it's unusual that I'm doing comedy because I'm a doctor it's also unusual because I'm Le ocean Le oceans aren't funny people culturally we're just very serious people my parents hate that I do this they think I'm running away with a circus I was super excited I got my parents to come to a show I was like it'll be a good time we'll make them laugh it'll be awesome it wasn't awesome yeah they didn't laugh once and they made everybody uncomfortable I made it this big deal at the beginning of my SAT I told the honest my family's here woo and then every time I told a joke instead of laughing at the joke the entire audience looked at my family my parents out there the whole time like this by the end of the show the entire audience was on their side I had 300 people looking at me like I was bombing I was silent crickets the only time the audience laughed was when my dad goes you're not funny I got heckled by my dad I want you guys to find me on social media I'm going to spell my name you ready my first name is vuk it's v i n g s o u k my last name is pachan p h o m m a c h a n h got it I do this at every show I'm up to 12 Instagram followers yeah it's awkward my name is 20 letters long okay I had to change my my login for a website I accidentally put my name in that new password box it told me it was very [Laughter] strong you're welcome to use it that was just my first name I tried my last name and it said too strong and the internet crashed so my name kind of stinks when you're a doctor all right I still see patients every day I meet a patient whose name is something like Bob it's a different guy every day but it's the same guy you don't know him but you know him Bob finds out I'm from La he has to tell me he's been to Korea which is cool cuz culturally geographically they're not even close and I get this from Bobs they're always like oh pachon what does that mean he thinks it's going to mean like he who fights bear what it means is nothing I don't know why this happens it happens every day I've started playing along when I meet a bob I'm always like oo Bob that's so exotic what does bob mean and then I told Bob pachon Means leosan love machine I don't get any more questions I used to have a job selling cell phones uh this lady needed help she saw my name tag and comes up to me and goes do you speak good English I was wondering the same thing about her and the right answer is yes I speak English how can I help you what I decided to say was uh you know what I help you very good I know that's cheesy but is totally true and I sold the phone some of you guys didn't get that I sold a Motorola flip phone as Mr Miyagi do you know how hard that is flip phone open flip phone close [Laughter] I live in Florida yay it's hurricane season that's always fun I get really jealous of meteorologists during Hurricane Season I think they have the coolest job in the world because they get to be in TV and say whatever there's no accountability if I screw up as a doctor somebody might get sick right they get to predict hurricanes cause Widespread Panic and then miss by 10 states and we're cool we're just in the sunshine like and we listen to them like they're Oprah if they tell us A hurricane's coming we go to Walmart like it's the apocalypse we murder our neighbors for like Triscuits and spam and they they show us something called the spaghetti model it's this like big satellite model with like a bunch of colored lines on it predicting where the Hurricane's going to go why would you trust something called the spaghetti model it looks like a toddler threw up on a map and I can't think of another job where you can use the spaghetti model like I don't get to use it if I'm explaining surgery I can't be like let's look at the spaghetti models [Laughter] just I have to remove one of these eight organs well no more when we're closer

Channel: Dry Bar Comedy

Views: 101,218

Keywords: Clean Comedy, Dry Bar Comedy, Stand Up Comedy, Worlds Largest Library of Clean Comedy, Vien Phommachanh, Vien Phommachanh Dry Bar Comedy, Vien Pommachanh Comedy, Vien Pommachanh Comedian, Comedy Doc, Comedian And Doctor, Loatian Comedian, Laos Comedian, Dry Comedy Bar, Dry Comedy Stand Up, Clean Stand Up, Clean Stand Up Comedy, Clean Stand Up Comedy Clips, Clean Stand Up Comedy Routines, Clean Stand Up Comedy 2024, Clean Stand Up Comedy Full Show, Dry Bar Full Show, English

Id: rsDXp5ICOP8

Length: 8min 48sec (528 seconds)

Published: Tue Jun 25 2024