What's The Biggest Dating WTF You've Had? (r/AskReddit | Reddit Stories)

what is the biggest dating WTF you've experienced had a tinder date and the guy brought his GF and asked for a threesome without saying a word about it in advance girl told me within 15 minutes of our first meeting that she was having a sex with a married co-worker and her favorite part was seeing him crying guilt after it was over one she was so wrapped up in her phone that she didn't notice I had moved over and started a conversation with some other guests to asked if she could bring a friend to feel safe completely understandable and I was fine with it brought her best friend and her date both girls ignored us pretty much all night and we left without them he turned out to be a pretty cool guy though and invited me to join for weekend football where I made even more friends edit how this blew up overnight I will try to respond to everyone over the rest of today guy in Story number 2 is a total goddamn bro I once got catfished on tinder nothing out of the ordinary right here's the catch this person had me meet them and acted as if they were not a different person one of the craziest experiences of my life you got catfished and gaslighted at the same time asterisk and then BSB gasps fished cat lighted a girl I had been seeing for a couple of weeks or so asked me to go with her to a funeral of some guy I didn't know what I didn't expect was that the funeral was for her fiance got out of there real quick once I realized why everyone was shooting me glares the whole time I was the side [ __ ] beehive girl she had a Marge Simpson head Oh about 18 inches high she was an actor and couldn't understand why roles would demand she cut her hair so she turned them down I went on three dates with her just to hear her stories she was totally oblivious she was the problem it was like I was watching a soap opera or something but she was serious combo I went on three dates with her justice Dorries I had a guy ask me out on a date and he suggested a Japanese restaurant I liked after I ordered the server asked him what he wanted and he said he wasn't hungry I asked him if he wanted to wait until he was hungry but he said ma'am he just wanted to watch me eat I laughed nervously thinking it was a joke but his expression said he wasn't joking the sushi was good Oh edit because people were asking I paid for my food at the end and he didn't offer if he paid I would have felt crazy guilty rather than being weirded out this guy went on and on about how he hated promiscuity and WH revs later on that night he tried to go up my shirt and touch my breasts I stopped him and said I thought you hated promiscuity code 4 I hate girls that won't sleep with me my ex NHS asked me to shave every last hair on my body like everything except for my eyebrows I refused so she dumped me she is now married to a guy with alopecia no joke I once went on a date where I probably said like five words girl just talked for over an hour and a half about ever including me in the conversation just reminisced complained and bragged about her life for over 90 minutes straight I was so taken aback that I just kind of drove home wondering if that experience was real or not I think I was like 17 or 18 at a time we were fooling around I was 17 my boyfriend was 20 or 21 we were out to dinner at a fancy place with his parents he loudly turned to me and said by the way since he won't sleep with me I'm f king other girls with his parents inches away that dinner became incredibly awkward after that I was a virgin and wasn't ready yet in my JC days had a girl invited me over for a study date her dad was home and we actually studied that at the kitchen table dad seemed cool from the little bit of conversation we hired aside from a 7 - 11 run for snacks and cigs our dad was 10 feet away from us the whole time I thought the date went well we talked more than we studied made tentative plans to see a movie couple days later I text her what's your weekend looking like so we can check out a flit grab some dinner she replies back it's not going to work she wants someone more forceful I was like what apparently running to her bedroom a few times for things she forgot was a him to me I was supposed to follow and pounce I guess a guy I saw for less than a month I act took it upon himself to vent any problems relating to the relationship that we had to a male friend of mine he didn't really know at all in retrospect he was a peculiar guy in many different ways in this hampered his ability to make his own friends to whom he could vent and get advice from at the time however it was incredibly strange for my friend who explicitly told him several times dude I see either is my friend not you I have no idea who you are please don't come to me with complaints about her I think it took about four or five tries and my dumping him for him to understand it some guy took my glasses ran out of the restaurant with them I got a text like 15 minutes later of him taking a selfie in them at his place he said if I wanted them back I would have to come over to his holy sh t what an [ __ ] did you mention an alternative of all the police could come get them this was while I was in the Marines I met up with this girl from path all seemed well from our chats and texting so we decided to meet up for a date in Palm Springs nothing out there yet I get there to find out she has kids which he brought along but never told me about even having kids whatsoever and without missing a beat she asked me right there to have a contract marriage I Spit my drink out of sap while she tried to explain how it would benefit the both of us I just looked at her with a stern look told her to get her sh t together told her to lose my number and walk the hell out she had previously told me how irresponsible her sister was a sister had received a positive result for herpes sister thought it meant she was clean and didn't have it I don't get the logic either a few weeks later we had been seeing each other pretty casually she mentions that her sister wanted to swap yeah no thanks on a third or fourth date I went back to his apartment to have a glass of wine we had a great evening until near the end he said wow I can't believe you passed almost every test full stop turns out he set up his apartment with small girlfriend tests he made sure there was little to no toilet paper to see if I would change the roll if I rinsed my dishes if I turned off lights behind me where I put my jacket and shoes needless to say there were no further dates while I can't honestly say I'm against that idea he definitely should have kept it to himself not major line match meat for dinner tells me she is lactose intolerant proceed Sternwood a food with lots of dairy products the restaurant was small and in an old house so the bathroom was a single closet style that happened to be less than 10 feet from our table her food upset her so she uses that loudly and leaves the door open after she's done yup still asks if we can go get ice cream afterwards that girl likes to party I had been dating this guy for about a month and I knew he was pretty freshly out of another relationship we were having bids on a patio at a Tap House nearby and his phone rings and he answers it and proceeds to talk to who I realized was his ex they were arguing and talking about their breakup all while he was still sitting at the table with me after about an hour and a few beers later a guy at the table next to me gave me kind of a nod to join his table I did he talked about what in our soul the other guy was being we spent the next couple hours chatting doubter bag left when his phone call was over comer and my new friend and I ended up dating for a year and were still friends to this day I said something the guy I was dating at the time didn't like so to punish me he punched himself three times in the jaw and knocked out a tooth a year ago I met up with a girl I met on a dating site we went out for coffee and had a good talk about movies and video games then everything got weird when she asked if she could read me some of her poetry about her ex boyfriend cheating on her she proceeded to sob in public in the middle of the poem and wouldn't stop until she was finished with her very long poem despite being a blubbering sniffling mess there was no second date on two separate occasions I've gone home with a guy after a perfectly lovely first date to find an array of BDSM toys laid out on the bed ready for use don't get me wrong I'm generally down but you can't just spring that on someone guys there has to be a discussion before you bring out a leather hood in the Florin 3000 in both cases there was no second date another tinder story for the pile at a girl on tinder who was super into Bob's Burgers and we hit it off on other things we both enjoyed first two dates we went out to eat and watch a movie third date she came over to my place and we ordered pizza and watched Bob's Burgers things were going alright until I started getting tired and started the time to use my force powers to get this person to leave so I can sleep portion of the night I had no expectations of her staying the night and didn't try to push towards it at all but she started getting very handsy and one thing led to another and she was giving me head IT was pretty mediocre but I could tell she wasn't that into it and was literally just doing it so I wouldn't have Helle she was watching the f king show through her hair and after a few minutes of conversation told me she was only dating me to watch this damn show cause her ex cut her off his Netflix sorry that's hilarious not gonna bother doing the full version so here is the short took girl on a hiking date he brought a machete she stripped naked and started whacking through the foliage with her blade and then got mad at me and through a road kill me met a girl for a first date at a local bar we had a few too many so decided to yubi back to my place girl decides she's going to try and polish my lap rocket in the backseat of the ubirr I was able to spare myself and the driver of that situation we get back to my place and start going at it next thing I know it's 4 a.m. and she's climbing back into bed I get up to use the bathroom and step in something I flick the lights on there is puke everywhere everywhere girl puked on the toilet lid and it splashed all over the bathroom the sink the walls the shower curtain the mirror violence tout is everywhere I spent the next 30 minutes cleaning it up then took a shower made myself some coffee and thought about what TF just happened it was an awkward you the back to our cars that morning for one of us I didn't have the nuts to tell her what she had done and I don't think she knows he thought it would be mad as I tur with his dick outs right in front of me and order me to suck you while we were sitting in a park and broad daylight I wish I was kidding I went on a very boring date with a very dull not talkative girl I tried every couple of minutes to initiate any conversation until I honestly ran dry of something or anything to talk about and decided that it really isn't going to work so I sat in silence while I finished my drink with complete intention of saying goodbye once I'd finished two sips left and she said something I kid you not bees with her words so are you going to kiss me at the end of this I was in shock and didn't what to say she then proceeded to cry and get up saying I knew I was ugly and walked away no I had a date suggest we meet up for drinks he showed up about ten minutes late two sheets to the wind he orders another whiskey and then for about 20 minutes tried to carry on conversation without acknowledging the fact he was clearly incredibly drunk I casually asked if he drank beforehand and he told me he had a bunch of whiskey beforehand in preparation for the dates to calm his nerves ok I get it then he continues to explain that he's only drunk because I'm pretty in that he was so eager to make a good impression he decided to drink and then he puked needless to say the whiskey did not make a good first impression I had a girl set a whole thing up where she was straddling me in panties only to ask to lick my eye and she added she had a contact kit and stuff so it was safe so she made a plan to lure me to her place seduce me all with the end goal of licking my f king eyeball she was hot to being an idiot and in high school I left I wish I'd banged you freaky i lady I'm a single father with full custody of my kids I was dating a girl for a couple months and she asked me why couldn't I just see my kids every other weekend like normal dad's she knew my situation from the very beginning she also took it upon herself to message my kid's mother and tell her that she needed to step up as a parent so she could have more time with me she got less time with me after those two things a lot less no time to be exact the second date I had with this fairly attractive girl who after a few drinks proceeded to talk about how she was curious about scat play ran away like my hair was on fire protip that's not a good way to put out hair fire we were talking about the make-a-wish Foundation and I asked him what his wish would be his response several years ago but the woman that told me she was only in California for rehab for her severe cocaine addiction oh and she was still in love with her ex-boyfriend but don't worry he had died three months prior from an overdose I got sort of abducted on the second date I got a text saying she wanted to take me somewhere special I figured she meant a bar nearby or restaurant or something I'm in Chicago nope still didn't tell me where she was taking me and she drove me an hour and a half away to her parents place for some reason she was really attractive so I stupidly went with it got there and she started playing with a dead bird on the ground and told me she kept gloves in our car so could pick up dead animals normally that wasn't enough to deter my meatbag brain as we proceeded to bone she then tried to get me to take off work and refused to take me back so I had to take a very expensive uber to work texted me a few hours later how much she missed me I blocked her immediately after that it's for a fun story though one time I went on a date with a guy who I was classmates with we'd been flirting with each other for a few weeks and he seemed cool the first part of the date was totally normal until he started talking about his faith he was a member of an Orthodox Presbyterian Church outside of town he believed as did his church in the concept of predestination which meant that he was saved from birth and bet I not a member of his church was headed straight for hell no matter what I did he discussed this in length is excruciating detail literally the entire conversation revolved around me going to hell I remember asking him point-blank why he wanted to date someone doomed to burn in hell and he told me that it didn't matter what he did he'd still get into heaven we never spoke again after that showed up for my date with Ashley who I'd been chatting with back and forth online this was 10 years ago sat down at bar someone comes and sits down next to me and says hi I'm Ashley looked at photo at what I assumed was Ashley and her ex-boyfriend and realized the person sitting across from me was the ex-boyfriend in the photo and that is how as a straight man I showed up for a date weatherman after I somehow politely told the guy he was misleading and happy new I thought she was the girl in picture and what he was doing was deceitful and a good way to get his ass kicked he had the goal to respond but it's okay we can go after chicks together and if we strikeout we can both still have a good time that is when I told him to go himself and left TL DR accidentally showed up for a date with a dude I went to brunch with a girl on a second date that afternoon she invited me out drinking with her friends when I showed up she was being flirty and touchy with one of her friends she basically ignored me and didn't introduce me to any of her friends so I stood around in their group awkwardly not saying anything for over an hour we finally started talking for a bit after we sat down at the bar I look away during a break in the conversation and when I looked back a minute or two later she's full-on making out and having her ass grabbed under her shorts by this friend she'd been flirting with all night pasok I finished my drink and left without saying anything to anyone she texted me the next morning to apologize but I never responded dating my now wife of 30 years and it was our first trip up to my family's cabin in Maine we were in our early 20s and I had been working on the place a lot before we met but the new relationship thing was too strong so I had placed the cabin on the back burner for the last couple months I walk her up to the door and turned the key he both walk into the whole place filled with my ex's staff clothes furniture shoes purses makeup on and on I'm freaking out and my girlfriend is staring to wonder WTF it turned out that my ex had stolen her brother's car and moved up to my cabin in an effort to fix it up and win me back made a few calls and found where she was I left message that she had to get everything out right away we came back two hours later and all of her stuff was gone you

Channel: Reddit Tales

Views: 113,004

Rating: 4.8875365 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, askreddit, top posts, r/askreddit, reddit top posts, reddit cringe, comedy, askreddit top posts, ask reddit, subreddit, reddit stories, reddit tales, funny reddit, best reddit posts, best of reddit, askreddit new, askreddit stories, reddit story, askreddit funny, reddit best, funny posts, funny askreddit, r/, reddit funny, people of reddit, stories, updoot, toadfilms, reddit jar, planet reddit, storytime, dating, dating wtf, break up, relationship, marriage, divorce, date

Id: MsWkUKO-94w

Length: 20min 27sec (1227 seconds)

Published: Wed Jun 24 2020