What Every Single Should Know Before Marriage | Kingsley Okonkwo

come on if you're excited give the lord a big big big big praise hallelujah please take your seat this morning i'm so excited one more time pastor me weapons tammy thank you thank you for having us this has been a great great time praise god we're on a long on a long trip we preached thursday night in lagos uh at the church in the ketchup from there we went to the airport friday morning we left actually from 5am you know at least on 5 a.m in fact we had to see our kids we had to look for the school bus on our way on because thursday nights you know because we went out before they got back from school and we were trying to go back they were asleep so um we had to look for them on our way the school bus to greet them that you won't see us for the next two weeks yeah because friday five a.m we're out of the house before they woke up uh to catch the flight to get to hillary from milan we are going straight to abuja tomorrow and we'll be three days straight we'll land on monday preach monday tuesday wednesday then take one day of rest on thursday and friday we'll fly to patakot uh preach in two different churches over the weekend saturday and sunday saturday monday saturday evening and sunday to different churches then from there again we're on our way to uyo also praise god so this is how we go on the road you know because we believe that investing in marriages is one of the biggest investments that can never be made you see it is marriages that fit society everybody you are seeing came from a family and the quality of that family determines the quality of that person and like we normally say even if you came from a broken home make sure your broken home doesn't come from you even if you came from a troubled home make sure your troubled home doesn't come from you this means you might have come from a background where the family life was not great you you owe it to your next generation to get it right that's why you must appreciate pastors like this for making this investment of helping you build your consciousness of family life is somebody getting what i'm saying very important the family feeds the society the family feeds what the society god has always had faith in families in fact family is the first institution that god himself constituted the family comes for everything if god had so much faith in government he would have first made adam a president not a husband and a father if god had so much faith in education would have made adam a principle if god had even so much faith in just um church you would have made adam a pastor the first thing he made was a husband and a father are you hearing somebody oh every other thing is a backup plan government education different church they all came after family failed is somebody getting this in fact me as a pastor i would have thought even church comes before family god said no family comes first if the family gets it right most of the work we won't do as pastors is work that has not been done from home the people that even give us trouble in church are people that have issues from their home all the rebels we have in church our people that their father has dealt with them so the middle of their mind they will never have enough father so when did they come to church see this is our spiritual father say ah father again no they will not be causing problems are you here somebody in fact the bible says for you to be a good pastor you must first be a good husband so that's the criteria for you to be a man of god you must stress around your own home well i told you that way around i say a good pastor then you should that will make you a good husband no god said you'll be a good husband that's what makes you a good person i remember some time ago we heard the story of the woman of god the mama of the house drinks service prison worship she came to sit on the altar they said mama what's wrong she wants to marry the man that comes to preach here they say it's already a husband they say no the one that preaches here is different from the one at home so the one that preaches is very kind funny gentle scriptural spiritual that the one at home is very weak that is this one she wants to marry they have to beggar that they are serving so close are you here somebody god believes so much in marriages because that is where society is fed from glory to god so this morning i'm going to move as fast as i can i'm putting putting many things that i can put in i'm going to start by talking to the singles and i'll move to those that are in relationship then i also talk a bit to married people so i'll squeeze all that in so that i make sure everybody's touching whether you're inside or outside in the overflow we see you and we believe that the same grace will reach you wherever you are in the name of jesus for those watching online also on on mixer we see you we appreciate you welcome and thank you for joining from everywhere praise god all right if you are a single person in the house first thing you need to realize is that singleness is not a cause singleness is a gift singleness is what a gift hey there is nothing as bad as not appreciating the gift you are given what i see on my job as a relationship coach and counselor is that many single people don't appreciate the gift of singleness singleness is a gift let me beg you single people let me beg you i appreciate the gift god gave you hey singleness is what a gift hey your single years are a blessing of god for you it's a blessing you should embrace not a course you should try to escape from you can write that down your single years a blessing you should embrace and not a course you should detest i'll say that again if you're writing is a good writing point your singleness is a gift you should embrace not because you should detest or try to escape from your single years are a gift from the day you marry your life will never be the same again many people are unhappy marriage because what they were expecting in marriage is not what they saw number one reason for happiness in marriage is unmet expectations they are thinking if i get married everything will be smooth enjoy your single years i said it that yesterday it's easier to be happy when you are single than when you are married when you are single you can do what you like you can wake up at 12 a afternoon and cooking to me when you get married that's normal long guy on the table somebody can wake up and say spanish i must eat for breakfast i don't know if you're guessing what i'm saying this is what people don't realize it's easier to be happy when you are single well my wife uh leaves the room sometimes maybe where to get in the room hey she's on she doesn't like light she closes out the window me i like light i open every window i was telling you yesterday it's easier so every time she goes out to go and do something i would have put off the ac open the window i'll be enjoying myself because i'm leaving here now he will not come and say ah i've never gone for 10 minutes you have changed everywhere i never forget what i'm saying when she's around i have to adapt to things that are not my natural area unless someone gets what i'm saying from the day you marry your 24 hours that was all your own is now divided your money that was all your own you spend it anyhow you like it's now divided and once you marry before you know your children will start popping pom pom pom pom as they come they take their own portion of your time your money and energy they take their own portion so you don't have six children get ready they are going to share all those things so by the time they are done with you very little of all this gift god is giving you 24 hours all your everything together already told me to be left for you this is why singleness is a gift many people don't use singleness they sing your single years are not the years you are waiting to marry your single years are the years you are preparing for life you are preparing for destiny because the moment you marry the amount of time you have to pray is now reduced because you can why are you alone you can pray seven hours straight when you are married with children you believe in the presence of your children the one that will come and interrupt you my children don't want to wake me up every morning when they are going to school my son come and say sleepyhead you now wake me up i said this boy if i knock your head he would jump on the bed they would jump on the bed they didn't care whether i slept at by 3 a.m once they are ready to go to school but they must wake up and they must eat pastor tell me what they interview one young wife they say what was your greatest surprise in marriage she said she was surprised that she has to be cooking every day i said hey i said so all these children is he running about you think he's energized our battery you think it's durable to run about they are eating every day she says she was shocked you see these are the things we were doing we are entering marriage with a fake idea your life will no longer be oh no this marriage you're running too hope you know what if you mean jesus is surprised that they cook every day no we charge our child phone we charge children we plug them and they make up money and they are fully charged when children are young they change clothes every two or three hours because they mess everything up their way up listen to you i'm going to be worshipped are you ready your singleness is a gift oh embrace it embrace it [Applause] you don't understand sir your single years are not something you are running from someone so desperate to live single life so i don't want to be single again because your mentality of what marriage is is wrong when your mentality of what marriage is is right your attitude about the whole process will be different i'll say this way it's good to desire a relationship but it's better to be ready for one write that down it's good to desire a relationship yes but it's even better to be ready for one it's important to desire relationship but it is important to be ready for one after one of my books is titled when am i ready i heard that the books are finished but you can get e-copies if you want or you can book down they will probably ship some down this week for you so please still take advantage of it if you want it i have one of my books tattooed when am i ready see so you're your single years it's okay to desire relationship but it's better to be what already for one it's better to be ready so what are you doing with your single years it's not a period we're using to wait for a relationship it's a period where you used to develop ourselves from life not just relationship for life it's a gift god has given you ask people that are married that's why anybody that is in school when they are married they find out it's more difficult because you are going to share your time from reading doing homework doing assignment to managing your husband or wife then children so this is what that's what your single years are for it's time you develop yourself for life it's what we all built during our single years like keeping some of us running till now i don't have as much time to read books as i used to have that time i asked my wife before we got married if i were a few years after we got married she had to contact i normally sleep with kenneth hagin kenneth copeland these are people that sleep with me every night on the bed ask her my bed ah damn my football when i was single oh the place i need to sleep is just one small place the rest are all different guest ministers are sleeping with me on the bench bishop yetico is there copeland is there hagen is there they are all with different books and tips on the bed the occupied three quarter of the bed me i only have did one quarter so when she came it was a big challenge managing all those men with us on the back i don't forget what i'm saying i could live with those men and i mentioned i'm just picking one book picking one book i read it now that i'm married with children it's not easy why don't you pick one book for i read chapter one five three lines your daughter has come that they want to do homework and those who walk are too hard i don't know if the children are giving homework or other they are giving you homework this thing is so hard now please if you know you're loading now better mind somebody that knows buko two of you your father mother can't do the homework and all of you not feelings ah he's not good thank god i might a smart wife once they bring home work i don't understand your mother because even me if i do this thing we will feel it oh fellaini too don't work i don't know who the homework is from i'm doing a ministry i'm still calculating something i didn't understand what the homework is about see if john was giving 18 era and he went somewhere and how much is left it doesn't matter how he does archival so into his life can i give him the remaining twenty-nine why is john looking [Applause] glory to god enjoy your single yes [Applause] use it to develop yourself trust me trust me your single year is a blessing from god you should embrace not a curse from that you should detest all right it's not something that should report you i still canceled somebody this morning she said i don't want to be single i don't i say why see even you don't like yourself yes now anytime you are desperate not to be single means you don't appreciate your own presence you don't appreciate your own company it's good to desire marriage i understand that i'm saying you shouldn't be you shouldn't be desperate once you are desperate is that there's a difference between desire and desperation it's okay to desire marriage but it's bad to be desperate to marry when you are desperate to marry it means you are you totally detest where you are who you are if you don't even like your company who will not like your company work on yourself your single years are a gift god gives you to develop yourself you are desperate to marry like i said it's better to develop than to be desperate because the same way you have a dream of who you want to marry that person has a dream of who they want to marry so usually say does the person you want you are dreaming to marry is he dreaming to marry you are you the kind of person that you want to marry how you can a person like the person you want to marry you want to marry because suppose i want to work in the best company the best company to have criteria of the best stuff i know someone gets what i'm saying hey life only works when our own all our goals um join it's not enough for you to desire somebody say i love him does he love you your own love is not enough so i want to walk in the best kind of walking mobile i'm a chevron great chef from two after i tell you who they're looking for how are your grades are you the one at the back of the class the sweeper pushing the rest of you at the back of the class but you want to work in the best company you have to first be the best student i know somebody's getting what i'm saying use your single years to develop yourself there are several areas of development i thought that quickly then i'll move to people are in relationship for singles proverbs 31 dj yes i call the people that make scripture for me dj you can see how we are mixing from message translation to king james so yeah dj you're mixing scripture so professor one i'm going to start from the back to the going upwards so proverbs 31 30. so seven areas for you a single person to develop yourself i'll run through that quickly number one is spiritual development see proverbs 313. he said favor is deceitful and beauty is vain it's about the woman that's what fears the lord shall what be praised the fear of the lord doesn't mean we are afraid of god fear of lord means we reference and appreciate the things of god all right god doesn't want to be afraid of him that's not what he's trying to do see people you are afraid of you actually don't respect somebody getting what i'm saying okay if you have police when you see an engineer police and you know you don't have your papers correct or whatever you are afraid of them it doesn't necessarily mean you change your behavior i get what i'm saying so last man says or police says wear your seat belts while you are driving some people don't care because they don't they don't understand the value of the instruction so when the symbol is they put it on just to escape police when police go out they continue their old way of life but when your doctor he doesn't have gun he says you will die in two years if you don't take this tablet every day he's not even there to supervise you but you understand the grave you respect his opinion so by yourself you are policing yourself so that's the difference between being afraid of somebody and respecting somebody god wants you to respect his ideas you know that he knows what he's saying when you respect him even nobody's chasing you you are monitoring yourself but you're afraid of him like police when you think he's not there you're going to do your own way i don't forget what i'm saying so the fear of the lord doesn't mean we are afraid that god will kill us suppose yeah yeah god this thing happened to me i'm sure it's god punishing me if god punishes you you'll be here to tell us so i fed my exam because i i wasn't going to church i fed my example god was angry with me look if god was punishing people before he reach your tongue first there many people he would have killed first of all i get to what i'm saying all the iran's girls would have died lagos potakota all the ron's guests would have died all the prostitutes should have died all the kidnappers and abroad god is not punishing people he's drawing people to himself that's what he's doing because people give god a bad name the reason i'm sick because i'm not believing in my bible so god punish me with sickness he wants to get my attention with sickness sickness if god punishes you you can't be here to tell us there's only one punishment for sin the wages of sin is what death you'll be here to tell us god is a good god are you here somebody the difference is that sin itself punishes sin itself does what punishes he says you are drawn away when you are focusing on your own lust see when lust has fulfilled the self it brings sin when sin has finished it brings death so sin is a punisher say because i fornicated so god is not blessing me no when you fornicate you will get pregnant pregnancy will punish you because your either leave school or do abortion those are life sentence punishment because the guilt and shame will continue forever that's if nothing happens to your womb so his sin punishing you see that's why even god hates sin god doesn't hate sin because you are knowing him he hates it because what she will do to you because i think god is saying god is even me as a cancer i've almost seen everything in this life there's nothing i've not heard before so what scene are you going to sit down because there's nothing you're going to say that will make however he knows that this thing you are doing here is going to mess up your life it's going to mess up your life god that's why i say god is jealous over you somebody getting what i'm saying if you have children you understand what i'm saying when a children are doing something that can endanger them you are punishing them not just because you hate them you're pushing it because this thing they're doing is going to cost more harm than these three strokes of care i'm giving you you've told the child don't touch your chest he's going to every day electricity will not be that gentle you want to give him three strokes okay and knee down that's better electricity with no time to knee down it will throw him up are you seeing the difference what i'm saying so god is not punishing you sin punishes you sin itself destroys are you hear somebody spiritually is the first area of development where are you in your spiritual life you had personality story she was able to hear god she was able to hear god have you ever been direct how does god speak to you do you know how god speaks to you have you ever been led by the spirit of god you've not heard god about everything but you want to hear god about marriage develop yourself spiritually spiritually hallelujah glory to god so that's the first area of development for everybody build yourself spiritual second one come rushing as fast as i can second one verse 28 i'm versus 27. you know i'm taking it from behind 28 first then 27. dj 28 said her children i rise up and call her blessed her husband also he present her 27 she looked at well to the ways of a household and it had not the bread of what i do the second area of development is domestic as a single person develop yourself how can you be younger i want to marry can you cook no i just want to marry what do you think we do in marriage young man can you arrange your clothes no but you want to marry how well are you developing to live with another human being without irritating them homely development for both men and women because you need both parenting is not only a woman's job domestic developing yourself in basic things of life can you iron your clothes can you arrange your clothes can you brush your teeth hey there are some people they win argument they don't know why they are winning argument they think it's because they have strong points it's your breath it's making people give up when you shout two times they say it's okay it's okay we agree you're the winner because i can't go and come and kill myself number three area of development i'm rushing them because of time but the points are okay for you to work with verse 26 dj quickly he said she opened her mouth with what wisdom i can't hear you she opened her mouth with what wisdom and in her tongue is the law of word kindness so the next one here is mental development single person how many books have you read sir i want to marry i want to marry how many books have you read even on marriage that's people load my dms with all these kind of requests but i want to marry just pray for me just do something i'm looking for a man i'm looking for a woman and ask him a common question how many books have you read he said no no time and you want to marry what how developed are you in other aspects of life many people focus on attracting a spouse they don't focus on keeping a spouse there are two different faculties two different departments that's why the industry that helps people attract they are the ones that are richer than the industry that help people to keep because most people focus on attracting mary kay you pack makeup makeup industry is a multi-billion dollar industry then you add hair then you add the surgery think all they think about doing to attract how many of them are putting any effort in keeping because attractive marriages are not lasting they will attract each other keep each other they can't keep no stamina no character no mental intelligence listen young ladies your shape can attract him but being sharp is what we keep him write that one your shape will attract him but be sharp because as men grow they move from sexual stimulation to mental stimulation so you want to track for him now in marriage he said no honey track your brain our business is struggling we need help track your brain for me not your bum but you is only tracking your lens twerking can attract it can't keep are you here somebody young man having six pack it doesn't keep a woman it attracts a woman but when the rent is due your landlord doesn't care how many pack you have if somebody gets what i'm saying in fact most rich men don't have six pack they have one pack like somebody says amusement park one big pack in front does it this pack you are seeing here on my front you don't get it in gym you get it in bank [Applause] this is a proof that there's a bank that is loaded six pack is for jobless people where where do you see time in nigeria's economy to be going to gym to have six pack six pack does he pay school fees six six-pack go three and a half back knee is somebody getting what i'm saying mental development professor emeritus people ask me where do i learn relationship from i have two major mentors i have many but two core ones number one is god number two solomon david professor solomon david professor emeritus you know solomon david he has done surveys and research that even harvard has not done he married he had one thousand women in his life at the same time and he still died of natural causes they didn't kill him he was able to manage them one thousand women in his life at the same time imagine the schedule if he will spend one day with you it means you take on that three years before your time comes again you say janet it was nice spending today with you so um based on our calendar i'm gonna see you in the air 2025 may 6th 25. keep your apartment don't forget and they are deity or they are married and there was no technologies how would they keep in touch how would they keep in touch how was he maintaining them those of you that you're never dating you just have female friends you know depression women can move from logic to emotion at any time they have two sides of their brain i will talk about that when i come next time [Applause] a woman is totally wired differently from a man at about six months in in in a in a mother's womb a rush of testosterone flows into a boy inside the wombo a rush of testosterone fluid is so heavy it causes something some people can call distant amount of brain damage that is so heavy that in rush into the brain of the child it divides the cord the nerves connecting the two sides of the brain so men only use one side of their brain at once they can't use the two but women on the other hand don't have that so they use two sides of their brain these white women are multi-tasks and men cannot women are always juggling things because they have two sides of their brain so human can be helping the child with homework talking somebody on the phone and also even doing cooking if a man try any of those things the food reborn the child will fail the homework and the person they are talking to their even concentrating yeah so when they say you should not drive and be talking on the phone these men they are talking to no women women can do it they have the capacity because they are two side their brain their juggling information the two men only deal with one somebody getting this so how was solomon doing it that's why a woman sometimes if you're arguing to woman because a woman the argument by the time they are even you don't know what we're agreeing about saying what are we what what's discussion about because she's able to put many things inside one discussion you cannot she is putting all of them inside so how did we move from this issue to this issue she's capable of doing it i get what i'm saying capable of women incredible sophisticated women are digital men are analog i'll talk about this when i come next time let's move forward so mental development so solomon taught me in book of proverbs he said it's a beautiful woman with an empty head it's like having a ring on a pig's nose a beautiful woman a beautiful face on an empty hair that's a message i just don't post it i don't know if they can find a script for me a message he's a beautiful a beautiful woman a blue face on an empty head and you know solomon is very wise so i'm sure in his lifetime would have met some women that were very fine look at it look at here he said like a gold drink proverbs 11 22 like a gold drink in a pig stout it's a beautiful face on an empty head professor emeritus you know he had one thousand women for him to come up with this statement it's based on theory and research it's not just a data this statistics because there's a woman he saw very fine shape everything he went to project you find your what's some power thing that happened i'll get your number now hit me up let me after i talk to you guys notice nothing's here and you see beauty is something that dash you sense is something you develop beauty you came here and saw yourself fine but since they don't give that one as gift you go and you do something for it so when you don't have sense it's your fault you can't blame another person the glass you bring but sense you develop it like they say to whom brain brain is giving sense is expected so which books are you reading as a boy or a girl you must read vast not just in one direction read vast no you're bitter by everything know a bit about what everything your curiosity must never die keep reading books keep reading things read about everything any new word you hear research it you have a smartphone but you are still not smart when i hear a new word i research it i don't say oh i don't know the word and no no research what does it mean because i cannot forget one day i saw you the word the one book i was reading i checked it that same day i went somewhere and went just in among people and somebody used the word imagine if i didn't check it and i don't know what they are saying i was able to contribute intelligently nobody knew i learned that word that day and if you're somewhere somebody say well you don't know interrupt them and say please what does that mean it's okay to ask you look cuter that you are asking then you look you look dumb and when you pretend to know something you don't know that you're not in your head are you here somebody be curious development your mental development because you need to make decisions in life what's the quality of decisions you are making are you still allowing your emotions override your sense what are your mannering your ego override your sense remember what four this is justin bouzou god to help us with time today number four verse 24 dj verse 24. say she make it fine linen and what select it and deliver it ghettos onto what single people develop your financial skills financial skills marriage costs money love is not cheap love is not cheap for god so loved the world that he would give the most important thing he paid the highest price because of his love love always cost love always cost that's why i laugh when i go we have a counselling practice counseling ministry when we charge people for counseling and they're telling me story i say you you want to grant money but you can't pay for cancer what do you think is happening inside marriage everything about love is expensive are you here somebody should be you'll be chatting you need data to even chat to the game you want to call out do you need credit there's no there's no free things i love nothing is free you need transport to go there but if you go out on dates even if you want me to buy but i don't want to buy and share you buy it you share one cook you buy it then you want to get married it's not house you believe in your parents wedding is it free person somebody approached me if you see her wedding community wedding big everything big everything but she married us in the crisis i said okay this is our challenges for counseling say i can't pay that i said complain say it's expensive i say compared to what because i see i saw your wedding some people are more interested in interest and pleasing outside us than pleasing themselves they are confusing the marriage and the wedding the marriage is more important at the wedding the wedding is a few hours the marriage is for life the wedding is for people demise for two of you somebody guess what i'm saying financially you can start now even as a student start planning your financial destiny if they are giving pocket money start managing it you can't spend everything you get it's a lack of management start managing start also operating spiritual principles of prosperity giving tithing start now because money is very important in marriage somebody's getting what i'm saying sir financial development start now i was sending them in pastor roland church where i preached during the weekend that the first millionaire in our church was a student first menu in our ministry was what he stood multi millennial he was flying around the world even if i saw airport where all youth fellowship there he was flying around the world milan vodka brings his siblings coffees even though he too was in school renting an apartment everything fly around the world they were calling him to come and do the job in south africa london everywhere from nigeria where all you fellowship youth but by virtue of the teachings he received and applied in fact his journey started he came from police hell he fought to the girl beat a girl they locked him up so did they release them somebody just dragged him to fellowship he was not born again just dragged him to fellowship he came with shot nick everything from police hell and he came to service and i preach what do you have in your house that that what that prophet asked that woman say what do you have everybody has something that has to stop making money so i preached on the principles and everything he took it literally you know people would have stayed in church long sometimes they they get familiar with scripture they get familiar with pastors saying faster you don't really like your suit you're not listening to what you say but people that come fresh they obey everything the guy went home that day his father used to be heading his headmaster but you also used to take a photograph but i stopped taking the photograph so he got him i said what do i have in my house the person said what do i have my house he got to look for the house he saw that for the camera he wasn't the photographer he took it and said let me i started taking a picture and that's why god and he was a major financial giver he loved to give him beauty always comes so let's let by his let's do he will come and give he had the kingdom thing going and he had the gift going as he sharpened the gift the grace of god came upon him he began to call him foreign he became one of the biggest photographers in lagos and became global they used to call him south africa he's there for the government south africa the body we're importing from nigeria pay his tickets and pay me dollars to come and take pictures in africa in london and all over the world if that may have never seen airport where are you but that message and the teaching as a student was a student of last he had bought a car he was paying siblings coffees paying rent in their house so i mean students don't excuse to be broke that's what i'm saying that's the whole essence of my story don't say things there's no money you're joking you're joking alone is not your source god is your source stop looking at the wrong thing if you apply the principles they work where are you financially whether you're male or female because many guys are saying i can't marry a poor man men to our wives now we can't marry poor women now i can't marry a pound that energy you're looking to look for a rich man just used to look for riches the same grace that will make that man a rich man can make you too rich why are you trying your destiny somebody else come and you just be rich thank god for women these days that are rising up and taking their place you can't wait for manu and things are so you see in our days of our parents the man used to have walked for many years for he got married a small girl now makes her marry me which means sometimes the woman can everyone anymore and she will help the family but before you are waiting for a man so the man now is managing with his muscle that's why i think he would many years to get married because he's not enough if you've had your own i will come again would you share our own wedding story no time for all that today pastor i preached for pastor fallon and sherlacher she's going to be 17 a few days she's a richest black woman billionaire in dollars a woman so what if she had folded her hand like this youngest i said i can't marry somebody that doesn't have money so if you have the grace to be billionaires but i waiting for one man to buy chicken pie for you when you have grace on your life let me move forward this is good keeping me here too long i've never talked about it in my mind okay quickly so financial development develop your finances learn to start saving learn to give learn to also be entrepreneurial look for opportunities around you you can buy and sell simple things what do your mates need that you can get cheaply you know what gift do you have can you please take are you bob can you pick clothes you have a gift everybody has a gift when you came here god gave you all the money you need inside you nobody will send somebody somewhere no give if you send passive if you said your children are brought to go on school don't you give them money even now you get a pokemon to school so everything they need is package inside them that's how you are when god created you everything that was given to you your rent is given to you when you are coming from heaven is inside you as a gift just that when you got here you were eating the gift of you selling the gift you you you make up every day and be doing your picture why do you guys even bend their mouth on their teeth what's yang gujji you have gifts of making somebody beautiful you are just consuming it on yourself if you make other people beautiful they will pay you your pocket will beautiful but instead you spend all your gift of makeup on yourself go ahead and start selling here instead of you only doing your own hair every day do for other people everything you need in life is packaging let me move number what five verse twenty two dj first one should have to leave this single people holding me down too much verse 22 quickly he said she making herself coverings of tapestry her clothing is what the next one is physical development you must learn to dress well packages people see you before they hear you people address you based on how you are dressed so learn to prepare yourself physically learn to be clean learn to be well shaven make your hair keep it in it you don't have to be rich to be neat develop your physically also make sure you are developed age-wise don't choose a life partner too young make sure you are physically mature statistically speaking the earlier you are the younger you are when you pick the more likely the marriage will work all right these statistics the earlier you if you pick at 19 20 all those things usually don't have a grasp of what life is you don't even those are yes you used to discover yourself but you've not done it you're picking someone so yes you're meant to invest in yourself so the more mature you are when you pick the more likely you are picking for the right reason let me ask you a question if somebody is zero to ten years old and um you have dstv or something like that that has 60 channels and they say pick only one channel you watch forever you are zero to ten what's likely to be china you should pick and this channel you're gonna watch it forever till you die you most likely pick you can do but the challenge you start when you become a teenager from 11 13 12 to 20 what channel are you likely to pick if you're going to pick one things like music other things like that fun fashion those are the things you would pick i should be going to get from 25 to 35 the kind of thing you pick with what change again so that's the point usually the age range you are determines what you think you need but as you grow older you have a better view of your life and life in general because that's what marriage is you are picking one channel they are going to watch forever even though there are others there are many other channels where you're going to pick one that this one are watched forever and ever and ever so what happens when people are not trying to pick cartoon network because making them happy at that time but as they grow discover life is more real than cattle so they say i'm done i can't do this anymore so make sure you're physically mature number one six i have to rush the journey now six quickly um give me verse 20 verse 20. it says straighten our hand to the poor yes she richard fought her hands to the needy this one is social maturity social development knowing how to relate with people social social it's called emotional intelligence you know how to relate to people some people they meet two people talking they greatly one person they have no respect you must acknowledge people you must understand that people have needs if you are relating with them you must know how to fit those needs this is why some people even get married they don't know they need to compliment their wife your heart woke up from the same house yes you watch her dress up i have about yes but when she's done dress you must still compliment her is somebody getting what i'm saying it's emotionally so time is such a social major you know how to deal with who at what level that's what this woman showed here and the last one i'm just rushing them because of time verse 11 verse 10 and verse 11 verse 10 first and verse 11 the last one he said who can find a virtuous woman it's her price is above ruby's next one he said the heart of a husband do it safely trust in her so that he have no need of spoil this one is moral development so he's had trusted her she has developed character he has developed character single ladies when you see a guy telling you i can't beat yourself with having sex that's a guy telling you i have no self-control you must really know what he's saying because guests always meet call me and say pastor there's this guy everything is nice only that he said he must have free vital sex he said he cannot do it access what should i do what should he do like how somebody has told you i have no self-control it's not about you it's not even about sex it's about lack of self-control how many of you give your money to a banker that day you bring your money say we have no self-control here will you give your money there as he has told you that here we spend people's money that's our only problem but we love you you see how you're laughing that's how it sounds funny when you say i love you but i can't keep i can't control myself every marriage that is dealing with adultery first dealt with fornication statistically it's rare to find people that kept themselves as singles that are struggling in marriage most times they fornicate fornication is just the baby stage of adultery the same thing somebody said can we keep swearing at dating can we kiss i always replied them with a question i said can a married man kiss somebody is not married to he said no he cannot i say two of you two are not married people that are not married don't kiss kissing is a part of sex sexual intercourse is not just a penetration it's a part of it this what differences are from animals animals don't need to be in the mood they are programmed in the mood if they are heat they will have sex doesn't concern them and that's why they can't even sleep with people that can't leave their own children or their siblings they don't have other sense but we as human beings god doesn't expect that you're always in the mood you should be thinking of other things work purpose destiny so kissing is part of the sex sex is a pope thing it's not just one act it's a whole a set of acts kissing involves smooshing other things they're part of sex when you're kissing somebody's hand behind your back even if you stand like that it will remain like that if you understand the purpose for sex you'll be asking that question sex is self sex sex is not something you have control over that's why when it comes to satan the bible says resist him when it comes to sex bible say fully there's no other place god says you're wrong everything goes to stand therefore i haven't done nothing to stand stand again but i say lord of sex is he run my son run carry your bag leave your charger leave your church around send for it later for god to tell us to run say flee sexual loss flee sexual temptation he knows you can't handle you are not wired to handle it you can't turn on gas say you're not cooking anything can a man can a man take fire in his bosom and not be born say want to kiss you see fake christian if i reborn again christian your job is not looking for what you can't get away with so how far can we go we thought just they say should leave the place what if i can whatever i can just touch small and come back you have missed the whole point you're thinking celibacy and sexual purity doesn't start from the act it even starts from the mind god wants to keep your mind clean you're even talking about kiss you have gone for already because you've been asking him about his means you're thinking about kissing you haven't gone far sexual purity is regarded if you have if you think about sleeping you already committed the act he wants you to even keep your mind clean you haven't talked about kissing long long okay let me move hey i spent my whole time on single people but singles hope you're happy let me run praise god

Channel: Kingsley Okonkwo

Views: 76,277

Rating: 4.9355311 out of 5

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Id: qQF6bim2o3k

Length: 49min 36sec (2976 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 04 2021