What Did Your Parents Believe In That Was Completely False? (r/AskReddit)

what something your parents always believed in that was completely false not my parents but my grandma believes lightning bolts can get through the house mirrors she covers all the mirrors in her house with blankets when there's a storm lightning bolts can go through mirrors but not through a blanket interesting my father always laments the invention of gas engines saying how much better life would be if we had stuck with steam engines since we would just have to fill our cars up with water sorry dad I know you mean well but steam engines don't work like that had to break it to him over the summer and he looked crushed that he had gone on saying this for so long it's strange how people don't realize that if they see something extremely obvious that would be way better than how things are done it's probably not being done because they are missing something my mom made a paste out of baking soda and a little bit of water and thought it would cure my sore throat she would put it on her finger and rub my tonsils with it until I sometimes puked she also thought that minced onion and your stuffy nose will clear it all up you just have to endure the intense burning for a few moments yay I hated being sick as a child well I guess you never faked sick to stay home from school my mother freaks out when we pass a truck she thinks the car can be sucked under the 18-wheelers trailer my father is awesome and always acts like it's pulling the car in then he saves the day my mom still thinks that it is possible my father is awesome and always acts like it's pulling the car in this might have something to do with why your mother still believes it my dad wouldn't let me play the nez after rush hour for fear of electrocution what my mom wouldn't let me play my playstation during a thunderstorm for the same reason my mother has weird medical theories she thinks walnut are good for the lungs because they look like lungs and that farting can help cure vertigo the first was at one time a legitimate medical theory however it's extremely ancient medieval and I'm surprised your mom subscribed to it the garbagemen they're all kidnappers and are pests when you hear the garbage truck come around run for your life my mother believes that it is a fact that women who enjoy intercourse have baby girls and women who don't enjoy intercourse have boys not only is this a wives tale but she has it reversed the women who enjoy intercourse have boys according to the myth I actually got into an argument about it with her she insisted it was scientific fact rolls eyes I was raised to say rabbit rabbit first thing on the first day of every month for good luck rabbit rabbit lettuce lettuce if I didn't say it first thing and I've never met anyone else who's ever heard of this superstition my mom thought that the word stealthy meant strong because of the b-2 stealth bomber airplane I know this makes no sense at all but it's my mom first came up when she said to me one day while you're looking very stealthy have you been working out I was like wait do I not know the meaning of stealthy that they know how to handle computers coming home from school and uninstalling toolbars that the computer is broken again because I used it one time last year my mom believes that playing evil games or watching scary movies will bring demons into the house she also believes that people put aids into ketchup dispensers at fast-food joints and that if you eat too much popcorn you'll get popcorn lung oh and she also believes that the government puts RFID chips into the vaccines shot so that they can track everything you do all in an effort to bring about the Antichrist my mom thought ordering Pete's are reflected poorly on her because the neighbors would see delivery guy and know that she hadn't cooked her family dinner on the rare occasions when she would let us order pizza we had to go pick it up and then drive it into the garage and close the door before we took the pizza into the house bTW it took us years to tease this out of her we never understood why she was such a reluctant secretive weirdo about pizza it's actually pretty sweet that she took her job as a homemaker so seriously but geez mom relax that people open bags of chips in the store poisoned them and then wrestle them no one does that mother that the average stranger is not only going to steal my stuff but kidnap and murder me I understand being protective but I can't even go biking through my own neighborhood my mother wouldn't let us drink water right after we took any liquid medicines she thought it would dilute them then she must have hated homeopathy with a passion my dad insists it's pronounced Steinfeld despite the obvious lack of the letter T absolutely fricking anywhere in Jerry's name that's obviously not correct anyone who does anything that involves putting something in their mouth smoking chewing gum do so because they were not breastfed as a child and need to make up for a childhood of not having something in your mouth every cigarette smoker and gum chewer in the world was never breastfed she was absolutely perplexed the day I came home chewing gum spit that out you were breastfed some people think that if a child is born through c-section they will not be as tough because they did not have to fight their way through the birth canal when I had my first child my maksimov are told me to not sleep with her in my bed I told her yeah yeah I know I could roll over and smother her I read about it mom no she says no the tape worms in your tripperz Spanish for intestines crawl out of your cue low but holiness penor and into baby kilo I'm sorry me Joe son but that's how you got baby diarrhea when I'll let you sleep with me that one time you was a baby my mom was convinced that Tiger Woods was Oprah's son I'm mixed my daughters mom is white and from Iowa her mom came to visit once and was curious about the weird black people tradition of keeping Michael Jackson's baby picture around the house it was my picture and I looked nothing like baby Michael any bye baby I mean a year old wife I was pronounced we fee in the eighties my mother and father heard of a game for the Atari 2600 called Dungeons & Dragons and it was possessing children who played it they heard that you would become locked in a trance staring at the screen and you would have a death grip on the controller and no one else could separate your hand from it and the power plug for the Atari would be magically bound to the plug in on the wall and no one could unplug it my parents are so stupid except for the power plug thing that's pretty much how I play most video games they had a bet going since I was young that I would come out as gay I'm straight my Mexican mom told me to not let a broom sweep over my feet or I'll never get married also she said I needed to keep a safety pin on my clothes during a full moon to protect my unborn baby also Lola Rona also also we live in Texas and one time our dog went missing and she swore it was the chupacabra to keep me from looking for it I later found out that my parents had put our dog to sleep because he got rabies , but WTF mom there seems to be a lot of superstition involving brooms like how you can sweep your porch after dark or you'll summon a demon that you can pause your online game my dad wouldn't still does use a light here as a measure of time for example we've been waiting on you for a Lightyear hurry up that with determination and persistence you can walk into a hospital or law firm and get a job as a professional in those practices without any prior related education or experience still hearing this one from my fiance's parents my mom legitimately thought that Albert Einstein invented math my father used to think you get irradiated by standing in front of a microwave mine too I'd get in trouble for watching the food go round and round my mother was convinced the Smurfs were satanic this smelly horrible tasting soup is good for you although I don't have any credible information to back this up my fellow Asians will understand tampons are not to be used by girls because they will make you a woman subsequently no man will ever marry a non virgin also that they might enjoy the process somehow and it turns the sweet little princesses into total horse not an urban legend just complete ignorance for right so I still get a ton of mail sent to my mom's house because I move a lot about a month ago I went over to her house as a visit and she hands me all of my mail I look through it all and thank her for keeping it for me but it's all junk anyway I tell her I don't want to take it back home with me so I'm just going to throw it away she says you can't do that it's illegal to throw away mail my stepdad and my boyfriend both look at her like what but I'm coming to the realization that this was why my apartment was filled with an open junk mail she's been saying that since I was a kid my apartment became so clean that night that the Pokemon anime contained atheist subliminal messages because it was produced in Red China which even I knew it wasn't ha this one is classic tailed my mum wants that 99% of all species that once existed on earth are now extinct mum said yeah it's because the Chinese are fishing them all out SM H their Nations always be like gotta catch em all my parents are aboard the autism train shorts cause autism batteries cause autism plastic causes autism not the fact that my dad was mildly autistic number not at all sleeping with the fan on will kill me I've done that every night for years my parents live in India as far as I can tell they believe all of the following that extremist Muslims are destroying the country that right-wing Hindus are destroying the country that left-wing militants Maoists Naxalites are destroying the country that unscrupulous rich people are destroying the country that unscrupulous poor people are destroying the country that ignorant allah trucks are destroying the country that pretentious intellectuals are destroying the country that blind adherence to tradition is destroying the country that indiscriminate social modernization is destroying the country that soulless corporations are destroying the country that 45 years of socialist planning destroyed the country basically unless your middle class politically neutral professional you're destroying India I was not allowed to drink milk after eating fish otherwise I'd get really sick and die this is common myth in desi culture one fish shot animals to wet hair when it's cold can give you pneumoniae that blood is blue until it contacts hair that if you swallowed a watermelon seed a watermelon vine would grow from your bellybutton I am 100% sure this is incorrect wasn't this a Rugrats plot might be of a Stedman thought plants cured everything she had a fever of 101 and swore the cucumber mint puree she drank fixed her dad took her to the emergency room and she came back saying it was her drink that did it not the overnight stay in medicine that going outside with wet hair would give me a cold people put razor blades in apples at Halloween and otherwise tampered with candy was all Durban legend even as a kid I knew it would be pretty easy to trace it back to the house it came from when I was a kid someone placed a razor blade on a local water slide so of course my parents didn't want me to go to the waterslide Park for yours you have been visited by the be humble Abbi stay humble and believe in yourself if you are new to the channel you can subscribe I publish new videos every day until then check out another video or don't either way have a great day you magnificent people [Music]

Channel: UE Stories

Views: 247,107

Keywords: #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh, parents of reddit, reddit parents, reddit parent stories, reddit parents secrets

Id: BDmfCCwKROM

Length: 12min 28sec (748 seconds)

Published: Sat Nov 30 2019