What did you do as a teenager that you will never tell your parents?

like and subscribe right now or else this will be in your bed tonight our /oscar etic by planet reddit what did you do as a teenager that you will never tell your parents all those times I sarcastically answered smoke the reefer to the question of what I was going out to do I was actually telling the truth my parents were incredibly surprised when I called them from jail when they finally picked me up I said in my defense what I literally told you several times and mom pauses and Garris you got me there now shut the hell up what did you do smoke the reefer dude your sister is insane whadya insane seems more like a done to me agreed it's one thing to mess with your younger siblings but it's a completely different story if you actively go out of your way just to spite them I think some petty revenge is in order like lying about her to your parents or murdering her boyfriend or changing her facebook status to something embarrassing I really didn't want to do pee one day but I didn't have a good reason so I knew my dad wouldn't write me a note so what I did instead was get a plain piece of paper and asked him to sign it because we're doing a thing in English where we try to guess the personality of a person from their signature which he totally bought a then went to the printer and typed out your standard sick note stuck the signed plain paper into the printer so when the note printed my dad's signature would appear at the bottom I will probably tell my dad this at some point because I'm actually kind of proud of myself for pulling it off my sister is amazing at copying other people's handwriting she used to make some serious coin when we were in high school got a lot of people out of school for the day this was my high school talent my mom taught me her signature when I was 12 because my reading class had a daily reading log that needed your parents to sign for a grade and she was just not about that I signed all off my own paperwork from the norm even things she wouldn't have necessarily agreed with I did the same thing but also at some point I realized nobody at school knows or frankly cares what my mom's signature looks like they don't go through and do a handwriting analysis between the beginning of the year medical form in the field trip permission slip as long as you don't sign it mom or something they aren't going to know although I did have the added insurance I could be pretty sure if anyone ever tried to call my parents they'd back me up and said they signed whatever it was for me if anything it looked more suspicious when my mom would really sign something and I had to sign it next to hers our first names are pretty similar and we have the same middle initial and last name and when I was learning my signature originally I based it on her so our real signatures look very similar my Forge one was more different my time to shine my senior year of high school I snuck out of the house at like 2:00 a.m. to get some my parents were a little psycho and put bells on the front and back doors you know in case of burglars but they didn't put them on the laundry room door which led to the garage the garage had a side door in it that led outside so obviously that was my way out the problem with that side door is that it's a bit hard to tell when it's locked since you can always get out but not necessarily back in so me being stupid and horny just been entombed it was fine and went along my merry way did the deed then when I tried to get back and I found the door locked I tried every other possible entrance all locked but I had my phone and an idea so crazy it just might work I called my mom and in my best helpless daughter voice cried mommy I woke up in the front yard and the door is locked I'm so scared she came right out and got me I mumbled something about sleepwalking then she made me waffles since I was so distressed my mom still tells the story at family get-togethers I now have a reputation as a crazy sleepwalker too long didn't we'd got laid lied to my mom then she made me waffles see there's a trick to those you can go out but not always come back in get a pair of needle nose pliers and slide the bolt why thing without actually filling the doorknob might require a bit of bending of the plate thingy that goes around the hole where the bolt goes in a pardon my overly technical language up JT just stick with the sleep and walkie thing and eat the while flight things it's less confusing than your attempt at English plus you get waffles i legit used photoshop to change my grades on a bad report card once they never figured it out I used inspect elements to change my bank account information when my mother demanded to see how much money I had and what I'd bought recently somehow over the next month or two I managed to fudge the numbers enough that she never figured it out I don't miss having my parents spying on my finances but I also don't miss being so financially irresponsible as I was in my teens better than the kid I knew whose mom asked for pictures of his stools she was a physician and wanted to know he was eating well at college pretty sure all the helicopter parents can go home now that this one exists my mom still recalls this one day when I was unusually positive and talkative with her it's because I was high out of my mind on Ritalin I had a mini breakdown when I took ritalin once and called my mom at 6:00 in the morning and told her how depressed I was and how anxious I was and that's a lot of the problems I had were because of her and my dad not a proud moment sorry more she learned it from dr. teeth in the 60s the guy from the Muppets haha maybe I am thinking of a different guy I'm exhausted right now the dude I'm referring to was famous for promoting LSD and had a funny nickname he went to festivals and had come down tents for people on bad trips my mom let my friends all come over the night after graduation believe it or not she got together with the other moms for us to have a little party complete with a few malt beverages and beer we gave my mom all our keys we turned up the music we got out a table we proceeded to play D&D all night my mom still thinks we got drunk it would break my heart to know the truth hahaha to be fair getting drunk and playing D&D is one of my favorite pastimes whiskey plus DMV definitely leads to engage shenanigans that have nothing to do with the plot in my experience that time I came home on the eve of my 17th birthday and you said I look different and I said it was because I'm older now it was because my pupils were blown out and I was on acid how I'm fine mom and dad by the way when did we get pictures that move when did you all start putting gifs up on the wall Hannah home on the 12:00 a.m. my pupils automatically becomes bigger because I get a year older going on dates with girls kissing girls you know the usual for a 16 year old supposed Muslim girl yep would get myself killed if I told them absolutely Haram safe to say that girl was her harambe allow on the streets a ram in the sheets my parents were both out of town but left the car with keys in kitchen anyway I was 16 just learned how to drive and this girl texted me to come pick her up and come back to my place 10 minutes later I'm grabbing the keys and driving across town in a car that I shouldn't be in with no license but they are never gonna find that one out I took my dad's manual car out for a ride a few weeks after he tried teaching me it only managed to store at once and when I did I seemed like a pro getting a going again when learning to drive a manual car the first thing you learn is how to quickly start it back up after stalling it still amazes me how in Britain most of our cars are manual if you pass your test in an automatic here you can't drive a manual you have to do a test in a manual to drive manual but you can drive automatic if you pass in a manual when I got my first cell phone and Nexus 5 my parents kinda went nuts with the whole apply and turned off in the living room it's night thing knowing them it was probably an auntie oh measure unfortunately or them my 3ds had in a half-decent Internet brow really strict parents of my friends was not allowed to go on the internet on his 3ds because of this don't get me wrong he was an innocent kid but was only allowed half an hour a day on it I wasn't either but my parents stupidly trusted me to both know the Wi-Fi password and not use it when I got my first cell phone and Nexus 5 how old are you I'm 16 and my first phone was wilder than a Nexus 5 when I was 13 a friend of mine used to steal his mom's muscle relaxants and split them with me at school and some of those days I would have my dad pick me up because I wasn't feeling too great but I did indeed feel great I had a classmate senior year who brought them at school you could see in his eyes that he was always out of his mind that it was me who looked at her in the family computer not my brother so did your brother my god I knew the Asian oh Wasson mine beat my deal like it owed me money about 15 times per day you'll never tell your parents but I guarantee you that they already know snuck out of the house with a friend while I was staying over with her to meet a group of boys she hooked up with one of them in a truck while the rest of us me and the other two guys hung around in the desert at night trying not to notice the truck rocking back and forth I must have been 14 or so never did anything like that before or since I went with her b/c I was afraid she'd get in trouble with the boys by herself so I wanted to watch over her we got caught by her parents who told me they were going to tell my parents I prepared to be grounded for life then her dad changed his mind and told me I was a good kid and he would let this one go but we had better not sneak out of his house again needless to say he went through this a lot with his daughter I never told my parents and never will lol and I'm 28 now did she ever repay the favor lol no because I never snuck out of the house to have sex with boys oh my god you're real-life barb I sneaked out a few times to have alone times with a high-school girlfriend only got caught once modern cars are so quiet teenagers now just don't know the struggle of trying to keep an old slant-6 from waking your parents when I was in high school I would push my truck out of the driveway and down the street so my parents couldn't hear it starter a helper unfortunately my truck weighed 7,000 pounds it was uphill out of the driveway and downhill shortly after so essentially uphill both ways and I had a big straight pipe v8 so I had to hoof it for a mile or two usually in the dark to my friends house hep one advantage of not having a car and being stuck with a bicycle in high school I guess rushing out on church to be sick with food poisoning when I was 40 lots of people consoling me and being driven home early I was very very hungover you you are I feel this I showed my os/2 way too many guys on the Internet you could always increase that number and then it can become more of a hobby that you're proud of and less other dirty secret I could consider making it a hobby Hannah I showed my OS to a bus full of Catholic boys I was 17 and they were I don't know about 12 my friends dared me to flash them just for a second I swear the bus almost fell over from the force of 50 prepubescent boys slamming up against the windows on the side facing me the time I found their home movie when I was looking for something to enjoy alone , sooo how was the FAP well with that username I sniffed paint every day after school for like six months straight that explains a lot my parents know I smoke weed they have no idea how much weed and they never will I'm leaving it's make your jokes living at home with my parents after college and this is me exactly they caught me within a week and decided they'd allow it as long as it was only occasional use my use is quite occasional in that the occasion occurs multiple times a day I've convinced my parents that it's my medicine my real medications are like fifty dollars per day I can't afford that so I seek illegal substances because they cost less America's great when I was about 15 I took half an eighth of mushrooms and maybe eight or more co-resident pills and went downstairs to watch a movie with my parents my parents were always fighting back then they really hated each other and I hated them as well but for some reason that night was very pleasant we were all laughing and joking and having a genuinely good time meanwhile the Wolves around them were breathing in the carpet was swirling beneath me I was having trouble focusing on their faces that would be the co-resident but I wasn't in the least bit paranoid lab they may know I was high it was an extremely strange night my dad and I are friends now and we've talked about how drug use when we were younger he was getting high in his room while I was getting high in mine and angrily taking my weed when he caught me and smoking at himself apparently my mom was the one who was adamantly into drug dad just put on a show for her sake but for some reason I've never mentioned that tonight to him plot twist your parents weren't even home and you were having a conversation with a lamp and a candle I used to sneak out and do stupid stuff with my friends in the neighborhood not drugs or drinking but stealing stop signs egging a house once laying on the golf course and shooting the I honestly though my folks knew about it and that they would just off the kids will be kids mentality I even got to ride home with the local police once or twice but no my parents had no working clue what I was up to I don't want to tell them not because I worry about what they think of me but rather that they would blame themselves from not seeing it I used to sneak out and do stupid stuff with my friends in the neighborhood not drugs or drinking but stealing stops egging a house once laying on the golf course and shooting the that doesn't sound that bad to be honest aside from the stop sign stealing those all seem like fairly passive crimes ones with FINA victims personally got egged would probably beg to differ join our community discord link in description a friend from high school and I snuck out with her boyfriend who could drive when I was 14 she was 15 he let her drive the car and she crashed it it was his dad's car his car apparently being in the shop I didn't really get to hurt besides some bruises but we had to walk 7 miles home at 3 a.m. we got home right before anyone got up what happened with the boyfriend he actually got beat up a bit and was bleeding from his head he called police and paramedics came we left before there came so he just said a deer ran out and he swerved hitting the pole since he wasn't under the influence or anything police didn't see anything off about it his dad's insurance ended up covering it somehow since he wasn't on his dad's policy I do specifically remember his expensive watch got shattered in the accident and my friend was really worried about that lol almost as much as the car I put a rug under a pine tree in my grandparents front yard and knocked the neighbour girl at least twice a week good times the front yard rug that sucking class by traffic large quantities of male mushrooms acid and weed all across the u.s. to sell at music festivals we would go on month-and-a-half long road trips dealing at them and could make 15k a person each weekend I'm not sharing that one it's a wonder most teams make it to adulthood alive let alone free I can only hope future me makes better choices where did you get the initial money to buy the drugs if you made 15k in one weekend selling asset say at $10 a tab that is 1500 taps at bulk prices of $3 5 a tab that could still be $7,000 and if you stocked up for multiple weekends because I banned him if you did a month long trip you weren't coming home every week to Rio worked summers at a potato shed about $800 1000 - you honestly don't need as much money as most people imagine when you're buying large enough bulk like mushrooms is only around $300 a pound I looked up Oh on the family computer because I knew they'd blame my brother he was in and we didn't get along so whenever he pissed me off I'd look up though I didn't even watch it just Google subjects so it would show on the search history one time he ruined my school project so I looked up some bondage and really torturous BDSM stuff so then when my mom went through the search history she'd find it tell my dad and they'd freak out on him they never knew it was their Catholic school attending daughter being a spiteful ma I'm not falling for that trick again the night I snuck out stole the family truck and drove 25 miles to lose my virginity my dad thinks it's hilarious but mom will never know damn 25 miles to meet your dad I upped my couch while on acid : same except I was sober the clean clothes on the floor was there not only because I was a lazy slob but my closet was a mushroom farm I guess your room really was so dirty it was growing old I hid all letters from the school I really was suspended like four or five times a month at least I just pretended to go to school all those days they think I only snuck out at night twice but that's because I only got caught twice snuck out all the damn time was trying to convince my dad to buy me a new computer for college he doesn't exactly like the fact that I play video games due to the Asian Middle Eastern mentality of study till you die but I'd be doing it for so long he the grudgingly accepted it after realizing it wasn't just a face however he made it clear that he would only buy a computer for the express purpose of helping me get a computer science degree shocker right unfortunately he wasn't tech savvy at all so I searched online stores until I found a taught that how I wanted to replace my old shitty one whiff it was an $800 Asus gaming laptop with middle-of-the-road specs for the time there was no way he would ever buy me a laptop that was built for the express purpose of gaming so I used inspect element to replace all instances of the word gaming on the product page with the word studying and made sure not to reload the page when showing it to him it will change the words back into gaming it worked and within one week I got my new studying computer I used to intern at a radio station one day I told my parents that I was going to go hourly to sit in on an editorial meeting instead I took a bus an hour south to interview our felon about her experiences with solitary confinement in prison debt for at peace I was working on they think this interviewed took place at the station if they found out the truth now they would probably get a heart attack masturbated on to my stepdads pillow I want to ask why but then again I don't do you want to know I mean I can tell you but damn I want to know but not really when I was 18 I flew to Portugal to meet my boyfriend at the time who was over there for the summer one day we decided uh get this particular City is cool but let's go exploring so we packed up our belongings walked it out to the edge of the city and started hitchhiking about a week and a half later we've passed through Portugal Spain and most of France and my scumbag boyfriend decides he needs to find himself as some and dumps me in a petrol station in eastern France so I wind up staying with some lovely Buddhists who are on a retreat in the mountains then hitch various lifts back to Spain and phy home when I got home my parents asked me if I got up to anything fun I said we did some traveling by train I'm almost 30 now and it's still a secret it's an interesting story but I was so up in lucky it went relatively okay I could have been one of those kids who goes missing or get murdered I grew magic mushrooms out in the open I told her it was a science fair project I was 13 I used to steal and snort my mom's painkillers initially to try to understand why she did it how she experienced life after two weeks I noticed I was walking around like a zombie the way she had my whole life haven't touched the little devils since left the country when my dad was a teenager he periodically hopped the border with his friends security was a lot less tight in those days so you just had to wait until no one was watching and duck into the field on the other side of the road when I go to music festivals I tell my momma I'm camping meanwhile three doses later wanted to go home sick from school early in eighth grade so I put a mouthful of soup in my mouth at the end of lunch and just held in there went to my next class and sat down quietly then five minutes and frantically rushed up to the front of the room and threw up in the garbage can got to go home early and miss the next day as well and my parents thought I had legitimately caught a stomach virus my dad knows this mom doesn't my freshman year of college I got busted for smoking pot at school just smoked a joint outside and went back to my room to do some homework 20 minutes later campus police knocked on the door my room reeks of weed they took my bun all my grinders pipes what-have-you they sent a letter home and find me I told my dad to keep checking the mail to make sure mom didn't get to it he told me just to be more careful lol my girlfriend ended up dropping by my house on her way to visit me one day and grabbed a letter out of the mailbox my mom never found out I'm a straight-a student and it had break her heart three more besides the smoking drinking promiscuity I lied about graduating the equivalent junior college I even made a fake diploma and transcript not me but my cousin his parents go away for the weekend with explicit instructions not to take the boat out as soon as they round the corner he's pulling the boats out of the garage my cousin Tim and his friend Eric go to a local lake to go waterskiing Eric is pulling Tim behind the boat and Eric starts to go in circles to make waves for Tim to jump Eric is sitting on the edge of the boat while driving so he can more easily look back to make sure Tim hasn't fallen the boat hits a big wave and Eric is tossed out of the boat now the boat is going in circles will Tim skiing behind it and nobody driving it is getting closer and closer to the docks with each pass eventually Tim swings wide and swims as hard as he can to get out of the water before the boat comes back around someone on one of the docks sees what is going on and jumps in the boat and shuts it off just as it scrapes one of the docks they took the boat home had a buddy repair the scratches and never said a word to my aunt and uncle thanks for watching subscribe for 3 videos a day [Music]

Channel: Ask Planet

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Id: e16W8q8Pjy0

Length: 24min 22sec (1462 seconds)

Published: Sun Jul 05 2020