Why's it gotta be so slow!
*door betrays mark* [raspy breathing] [moaning] I'M A BRAVE BOY! *suuuuuuure* Hello, everybody! My name is Markiplier, and welcome to Resident Evil 7 Now, I've played the demo for this a while back and the full game just got released. I am only going to do NORMAL because I'm not a masochist. [scoffing] Not just gonna start on MADHOUSE And, this game promises to be a lot more... Hi... Jesus! Hi~ ...yay... ...Yea Hokay Miss you too!? ...this... ...hoh-kay. That's so sweet! That's so lovely Eww. What's wrong with me? [whispering] ...what...? hiiii...? HMM. [Concerned] HHHMMMM. Okay, so I was wondering. That cushy baby-sitting job by the sea [phone dialing] seemed so bad and it was a bit over compensating [ring back tone] in the love department. Me thinks that maybe this lady wasn't so faithful to Ethan. [quietly] Hmm... Yeah, okay. Alright. Man, that's so weird because I thought for sure that was live action. And maybe it's a combination of the two because that looks pretty legit out there like not even gonna lie that looks legit like film but maybe they just ada- OH I UHJU- *Freaking out* Do I need to ...? Oh, I thought I needed to pilot for a second there but I guess I'm okay. Alright, just gonna park in this RANDOM MARSH. GO LOOK FOR MY WIFE. I'M THE LOVIN' HUSBAND. I'm sure nothing BAD's gonna happen over here. Oh, cool. That looks, like, legitimately good. I'm mean obviously it's a Triple A game I don't often get into this so of course it's gonna look good. They made it look good and it's current generation. We're in the future! Where graphics are GREAT. Oh man. But I'm excited about this one. Because this Resident Evil promises to be pretty darn scary. Whereas the last two have been a little bit, you know not quite as scary and more action-oriented. Which is totally fine if that's the way they wanted to do the game, but In *my* opinion Resident Evil often offered this insight into- whoa, that's radical offered this insight into this zombie apocalypse. But this one, actually- I don't know if it's in a completely different universe but it's in, like, this side universe where anything can happen. And I'm willing to bet that I'm not gonna be able to get in here am I? Ooh. Menacing. It rem- [clanging noises, startled pause] ...H-HI?? HELLOO? GOOD DAY AH, locked, I see! Excellent! Just testing your security! Doesn't even seem to be a padlock on there. Just seems to be wrapped around. Well I wouldn't want to be-[clunking] -rude and intrude on anybody's house. [intercom button click] Hello, looking for my wife My wife that I assumed is dead. [clanking echoing, ambient noises] Turns out she's not. Maybe. ookay. Alright then. I'm pretty sure this means, "Keep Out" even though I probably could vault over that. I'll take the [thunk] the very dark and dreary path off to the side and see where that leads me. Probably into a world of success and NOT death. Just told me to run but, my gamer instincts have already taught me otherwise. [quietly] Now what do we got here... [ambient rumbling] Some kind of decrepit van Some kind of camera equipment, too. So it might've been a news van of some sorts. Now, let's find a dead body! Awww, nothin'. Nuts. [laughing] "Sewer Gators"? "Project Proposal: Sneak into a Louisiana ghost house." Oh! In the demo there was this camera crew that wanted to go around and look at, like, haunted loca- Eeeugh... "Join us". "Schedule Equipment" ...okay. And then "Join us" written in what I can only assume to be cherry red lipstick and definitely not blood. Also why's this tarp here? And also why are there wires here? And also- *wincing* "Accept her gift"?? Whose gift?? Who we talkin' about here? Mia? Are we talkin' about Mia? Are we talking about Mio *mio mio dance * from Fatal Frame? [insects buzzing] [quietly] oh jeeze. Eugch. Both Ethan and Mark: Eugh. I know right? Gllcgthh [footsteps continue] Man, this actually, legitimately is really cool because, I It is weird coming from a stance where I only play indie horror- [tense ambiance undulating] What the fffuck--HI?? I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS AND THEN you come waltzing through the woods!! Uh-uh Nuh-uh. Oh no-no. Oh nonono. Was that a zombo? [wet footsteps] Whadaza Was that a zombini? [quietly] eeeh... Ah, that's definitely a swamp At least I know that My gamer instincts is telling me that I can't go down there. [crows cawing] Might as well press onward into this infested bog of some sort. Following some creepy... ...balding gentleman that might've been a zombie. Ethan: *gasping*
Mark: Whoa, what the fuck is that? What IS that? OH WHAT IS THAT WHAT AM I [crows tumultuate] Ethan: AAAUGH!
Mark: I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M LOOKING AT ...I still don't know what I'm looking at! Is that a pair of pants, or is that a dead body?! I can hardly tell the two apart! Whewph... Whatever that is it dun' look good. I still... whu [stammers] Is my brain just not able to comprehend what the hell this is? Are those decaying pieces of FLESH OR IS THAT A PAIR OF PANTS?? I legitimately can't tell! I'm gonna assume it's flesh. And NOT the good kind. ...OOHHH IT WAS FLESH Oh I shoulda looked to the LEFT at the FLESH MONUMENT. OH GOOD OH GREAT Wonderful. Man, I should have- I should [sputtering] I should PROBABLY go home at this point You know when I see when I see a Christmas WREATH made of COW LEGS I probably don't wanna be around here for too much longer. I mean, the decorative buzz saws are definitely an addition, but something tells me that only Death awaits down here. Maybe it's all the Death that's over here. Nah, I think I'll stay crouched. Just in case, you know. Just in case that friendly gentleman that was walking through the woods decides to invite inside for a nice Christmas dinner.-- It is good though, because I haven't...[ambient rumbling] Wwww-Are these the birds that I just met over by the questionable pair of pants?? Oooh, these are very dead. But why? What just killed these things? I can only assume it's showing me these dead birds because they *just* died. They don't look decomposed, they don't look eaten. They're literally the birds that were just over there. And then they *just died*. [softly] Oh no. Is this the back of the house? The back of the house isn't as meticulously kept as the blade runner of the house. [softly] Oh shit.
Ethan: *grunts* Ah, 'scuze me. Alrighty then. Hello Hi. How are you? Examine in detail? Oh I will. Oooh. Is that... Is that Mia? [x2] Did that say Mia? [rustling] [quietly] Oh shit. ...Hello. Alright. What is this? Email from Mia. Print-out of Mia... 'Kay, let's take a look at this. "F. Dulvey, Louisiana Baker farm. Come get me." [Confused] But she just recorded a thing where she said, "Don't come get me"! And it was sent from the future! I definitely shouldn't trust THIS one ...Alright, fine. Whatever. Anything on the back? No, just an envelope that I haven't [mumbles] Man, why does Ethan look like Brendan Fraser there? Oh well. Probably a cool guy. Alright, let's see what we got here. Mia's driver's licence covered in a strange black substance. EUH. EUH YA Ah, that's a good sign [sarcasm] In my In my gaming experience when things are covered in a strange black substances it's usually the BEST thing that could happen. ...ulgck. [scoffing] Lemme get a closer look turns out it's MUD. Alright, what do we got? Anything here? [ambient leaves rustling] Well, it's definitely Mia Winters. And this is definitely her purse. But if this is from three minutes ago why would her purse be out here in pristine condition? like, it's legitimately out here in very good condition next to a burning pile of...whatever. I have no idea what, though. [wincing, quietly] oh, we shall see. Hi? Hello? Wait, is this the same...? Is this the same exact house that we went into before? They said that the demo didn't have anything to do with the ra- the ..[stuttering] the rage game the normal game..they said that the demo didn't have a thing to do with the normal game, but this is definitely the same area its during the day, but its definitely here ...maybe they were trying to throw people off [softly] ooh helloo? [worried] i dont like that [fear] ohh . i DEFINITELY dont like that maybe i should close the door! ohhh this is dark [door squeaking shut behind him and flashlight clicking on] OHH DID I DO THAT, DID I HAVE A FLASHLIGHT ON ME?! DID I TURN THAT ON?! Oh I did all those things maybe i could warn my- [crack] -self about the things that I choose to do when i chose to do them! I'll only open it halfway no-no one needs to open it the full way This is definitely the same exact place. This is legitimately the same place. They said it had nothing to do with the demo! [Rattling] Sorry i'm sorry I shouldn't be intruding. Just looking for my wife I dont have an item to use so it wants me to find bolt cutters i can only imagine Oh fuckin shit I've been here before Oh I've been here x2 What if those mannequins are still here? Hello... Is this still disgusting and.. horrifying? Yup, just the same as it was before. Eewww! [Mark noises] mkay well, i guess dinner's on Alright so if i can check in these drawers.... Ooohh That's creepy Is that a scary little girl standing at the end of a dark hallway? I guess that confirms my suspicion.. Okay so, this if i recall correctly, in the other one There was a way to open this one, but i don't know if i'm gonna be able to do that now Helloo.. Eughh! Eeewwww! Grody.. Is something gonna jump out at me? I-I remember vaguely there was som- eugh alright huh That definately sounds like the sounds of someone living here so maybe i should get the fuck out "Over 20 missing in 2 minutes" Well that's a good sign! Ghost sighted in the bayou Oh! Why do people live here? Why do- Why does anybody live here? Why WOULD anybody live here? God... Why would anybody at all come here? For what purpose? For what reason? Is the finger still in the drawer? Nope! Stop that! Jesus Christ! You don't need to do anything, I'm a guest! I've been here before. Is that the Slenderwoman? Yeesh okay do i go upstairs first or i go down there first? I'm gonna upstairs first Cause it scares me Maybe I remember... Maybe if I use my knowledge from the demo, I'm gonna be able to do something here... That's gonna be valuble Oh! Is this a save point? It is! Oh! It's the same save system that I had before. Well that's good to know Oh g- Oh! "Derelict House Footage"! Is this from that show? Is it legitimately from the show because that's gonna be awesome I actually am kinda happy that it all tied in, And I'm kinda happy that they threw people off the trail because that- -that brings in this element of familiarity to this house. But then again, I'm aware that this house is full of horrors and a bad bad family And a dad that wants to welcome me into said family and then... Some horrible murders happened here... Oooff Okay Voodoo dolls? No Geeze, it's exactly the same Yeesh Yeesh Okay if i remembered -Ooohh That is really disconcerting Oh shit. Oh SHIT! Oh SHI-hit! Oh who is that? Is that Mia? Why is Mia sitting in her underwear outside? I have no idea Okay hello Oh that's -that's -that is a less than reassuring thing Either this is one of two thi-this is one of two things Either a dad reading his daughter a bedtime [clank] story or someone Or someone standing over a dead body It's either one or the other there cannot be aaaa second chance Okay so somewhere there's a fuse For the uhh thing I don't know if i wanna play that but here we go BING BONG! (quietly) bring it on Fine then. Think I remember it doin' that before Haunted Piano and such. *Mumbling* What have we got here? OOOH G-hood! A JAIL CELL! WELL that kinda' confirms my suspicions about the last photo. Alright, what if I recall correctly- eugh... *Creaking* Looks like the owners... Is that Mia? Whys that face glowing so much? *Mumbles* That's no good... But if I remember correctly... OH but I can't- OOH I CAN USE IT!! OH I CAN! I remember!! Ahahaha!! *Chain Clinking* *Gear sounds* Oh-kay Ohh Shit! ._. That's so COOOL!! :D My memory from the demo serves me! *Mumbling* Is there a fuse 'round here? No~ Somehow I know all the se- *Creak* ._. -crets of this house... *mumbling* And there are a lot of noises happening and I do not appreciate- *Alarmed* I don't know if I want to go down there just yet!!! AHH! I DON'T WANT TO GO DOWN THERE!!! WELP! I GUESS I'M COMMITTED! HERE WE GO! Oh fuck- but I- I didn't look at the *ladder breaks* GAAH fuck! *Ethan grunts* *Ladder Breaks even more* *Ethan yells* *More grunts* Fucking Shit! Aw, GOD DAMN IT. I didn' look at the god damned tape! Ethan: "Damn it." Aw shit. I am in a world of hurt aren't I? OH I'm in a lot of trouble. 'Cause last time I been down here there was a dead body! Now there's not. SO MAYBE that dead body is actually my body! *Mumbles* Oh fuck dude... ._. Hello? Sorry I seem to have fallen and can't get up. I've got a tape that- aw Fuck man. How do I g-go in the water? How do I- ah. AUGH GROSS! Eugh...s-something touched my ankle... eeh Well this ain't good. Is there gonna' be a water monster? Is there gonna' be an Amnesia style water-monster? Yeeeesh YEEEESH What am I holding the flashlight with? My TEETH? YEEESH okay ._. Alright. Everything'd cool- *Loud bubbling noise* FFFFFFuck off! Stop farting on me! I'm okay with underwater monsters so long as they don't fart up against my leg! Alright... Ok... Alright then! Everything seems cool! Nothing seems to be threatening m- *Loud Bubbling* AH! FUCKING!!! *Ethan Splutters* Fucking fucking fuck! Well there's the DEAD BODY from before!!! Oh that's a different dead body isn't it? OOH maybe that's the camera guy! Shit dude... Man that's a bad welcome to the family if that's all the treatment that I get! OH.Who's that? WHO ARE YOU?! Who are you~? Why are you all looking down and so sad? *mumbling* sssnot like you're gonna' be- *Metal Creaking* O_O hi~ Can I help you? *Door Creak* Oh boy... Slap. Lemme' slap that with my wet hand. Oh shit... Well that's not good... I can barely see a thing down here... Hi, hello i'm Markiplier, how are you doin'? CAN I HELP YOU? It sure seems like this house is occupied! Alright so we- *Loud Bang* FFFucking Fuck! Can you stop that?! Jesus *Door opens somewhere* Okay so we've seen to have a happy family here is there some- oh. There's another kid here that seems to be away from the rest of the family. And their face is covered in red. *Mumbling* Ah that's not good. That's pretty much a bad sign. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." "I'm-" "I'm sorry daddy, I will not be bad anymore. I'm sorry daddy I will not be bad anymore." So this is justa' looping message of: "I'm sorry daddy, I will not be bad anymore." That devolves into- what looks like an eye. *Mumbling* What the fuck does that mean? *Footsteps* That better be me, okay that's me. Oh man. Man, I shoulda' looked at that goddamned tape! It just saved on me! Something's gonna' HAPPEN! Oh hai. Well there's the bolt cutters! Do I Need THAT?! okay... Alright. Ben Dead, Harold Turned Aurther Turned, Tamara Turned whoa (softly) Clancy L? I'm assuming Clancy means uuh-alive? Mia! it Does not say Turned or dead! So that's some useful information... Clancy is L! ok I got those?! Which means that eventually I'll Return upstairs which hopefuly means I'll be able to watch this tape But I think? ooh This also means I could probably mia? (whispers) oh? I got a bad feeling about that? Oh?! I Got A Bad Feelin' About THAT! OH! I got a bad feelin' about THAT! yeah this a bad idea! here we go! I'm just full of bad ideas today! oooOH huurhuur! O-o ok alright ._. helloooo~? Slap the~gate slap the gate? the..hello?...hi..oh oh no.. oh no well shit it is mia! Well, fuck. I probably shouldn't. oooh Ooh Kay alright i'm a little concerned and confused I thought that was going to be a bad idea good thing I didn't ignore you and and go somewhere else~ ;P holy shit! Yeah, maybe. Okay... Ah, shit. Oh boy. Alright. Okay .___o Alright... Maybe I should crouch. I like crouching Crouching makes me feel safe You think? You've been here for three minutes and you only think it's this way? What are you talking about? I don't trust yo- Ohoh god EEHHRR EEEGHHH What's with the piles of meat? Eww Oh Well there are shoes- Oh no they're bags. Bags with meat in them, I can only assume. Oh, fuck. Okay, well I'm over here now. *whispers* Okay.. Alright, I trust you. I TRUST you. Okay Alright, I don't know why we have to. Oh, I mean I guess it's the only way out of here the way I came from was broken Not that you couldn't give me a leg up on something. I haven't seen any other items I can interact with. The family...? Yeeeesh I don't wanna be welcomed into this family. Oh jeeez. Eghhzzzzzzghh YEEGHH Reminds me of Outlast. "Hello, little pig" Yeeheesh Alrighty then Oh jeez, that's so scary. What's there!? What are you talking about? OH LOVELY DOOR. Tell me you can unlock that door. You gonna do something about that? Okaaay.... Do you? Okaay.. WOOAH fuck, hey doll It's okay! Whaaaat? Uh. Oh. Oh jesus... Oh, this is bad. Okay. Well, alright then. You take a nap I guess. Mia? Mia- you doing alright, Mia? Ohh, Mia seems in bad shape. Eggghhh Yeeeghhhh Alright, so "there's another door here, I'm sure of it" okay. *E 001* Oh, hey... Euughhh Is that GRANDMA? Is that grandma's finger? Oh boy. Okay, well E 001, and I don't know what that means necessarily. Wew. Maybe that's like "patient zero"; the first one in the family to turn? UHHH GOD WHYYY? OHHH what is that Is that MIA? Is that supposed to be Mia? Oh shit. Who's that? Well that's okay, I'll stay back here. YOU KNOW WHAT Seems like everything is going on. Maybe I should rush out and be the hero, MIAAAA Oh, fuck. Well, that's not good. Okay. Yeah, sure. This seems like a good idea. Oh boy. Egh. *Creepy door mysteriously opens* Oh, yeah. Yeah. Was a bad idea. Yeah, I can definitely confirm now that this was indeed a bad idea. Am I coming back out? OH MY GOD Am I back- OHH shit. No. Oh, fuck where am I? I DUNNO WHERE I AM WHY IS IT STARTING TO RAIN? IT WASNT RAINING WHEN I GOT HERE WASNT EVEN NIGHT WHEN I GOT HERE WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?? IT WASNT EVEN DUSK OR ANYTHING Hello? Heh, lemme just try and dial 911. Yep, that ain't working. YEP. Not working. Okay. I haven't solved the puzzle. I haven't figured out the deepest secrets of this game just yet. God dammit, did that close on me? Am I not going back? Fuck. Why didn't I watch the god damn tape? *sigh* I'm sure it'll come ba- OH. GUEST house map? View ma- Oh shit. Oh shi- Hidden passage! Oh that's very good, thank you for that. OOOHHHHHH. Oh, living room is where the T.V. was hidden passage is where I went down! And there's a lock thing right there- so this is the GUEST house then? That's crazy. List of names, blade runner and back? So I coming up by the bathroom here? I don't have the other floors but EGHH. Ewwhh, okay. Alright. Soo I imagine I'm going to be wandering through this house quite a bit. The bathroom is wide open! HELLLOOO? Oh, fuck dude. Heeyyy Hidi hidi ho. Ah, I got bad feelings crawling up and down my spine. Oh first aid med, okay. Alright, good. Fist aid med. Are you gonna hurt me? That's usually what FOLLOWS when you give me a FIRST AID MED [Banging on the wall]
fuuUUCKING FUCK. Don't do that. OKAY? I'm not home... [banging continues] I'M NOT HOME [Mark yells at banging] IM NOT HERE RIGHT NOW Can you go away? Alright, thank you. [still banging] Oh, fucking STOP. (more banging) Yeesh. (thud!) o_o! (knocking) Oh, that's not good. Maybe he's boarding up another door? Stop it, man. (knocking continues) Fuck. (knock knock knock) It's locked! What am I supposed to do? Jeez- OKAY, ALRIGHT. I GET IT. [banging still doesn't stop] I GET IT OKAY? I'M COM-ohhhhh eghh Alright. Okay! I DONT LIKE THIS.(knocking abruptly stops) [Metal Dragging on Concrete Noise] *startled* *frightened noise* *eerie music plays* *Whispering* Oh, fuck. That's not good. Oh, that's not good at all. *Hears baby noise* OOOOKAAYYY HOW ABOUT NO?! hoh FUCK. oh FUCK. IM A BRAVE BOY I'M GONNA GO DOWN THOSE STAIRS *beats chest in manly fashion* IM A BRAVE BOY. Oh, fuck you in a million ways. Oh fuck you du- Why you gotta be sO SLOW? *creepy breathing* IM A BRAVE BOY! MIA? OH FUCKING GOD DAMMIT Hi. Okay Yeah. Hey. How you doing? Hey, friend. Oh FUUCK Ohhh OWIE. *slightly offended* Okay then. Well, OH FUCK. *manly screams* Oh, jeez. Holy cra-AHH IM RESISTING. IM RESISTING AS HARD AS I CAN. Oh, fuck . Get off me Mia you- Oh my GOD! Oh mY GODD My fucking hand. MIA. Je- woah fuckin- fuCKING WHAT DO I DO?? Holy shit! I can't exactly turn and run. Oh, jesums. Oh, fuck! This is like a legit fight for my god damn life here! Fucking n- OWWW OWWW WAAA Ow. Fucking what the fuck? Ohhh no. Oh no. Okaay... Ahhh.. What the fucking fuckING FUUCK? Yeah what the fuck ar- Why am I not more panicked about this?? I GOT STABBED IN THE SHOULDER. AND STABBED THROUGH MY FUCKING HAAAAND. *in shock* what the fuck? Oh yeah, that'll fix it up. *fart noises* Oh yeah, lemme get some goop juice on that! WOW ALL BETTER OH MY HAND FEELS GREAT WHAT ABOUT MY SHOULDER? *more fart noises* yEP. Hundred percent back to normal! Thanks, Mia.! @3@ I don't even have a GRUDGE. Speaking of the GRUDGE... I'm gonna back the fuck away. and hopefully never have to see you again. :D I shouldn't have come down here wherever we arreee. I'm gonna keep my fucking eye on youuu. *sucks in air* yup IIII'm gonna keep mmmmmy (voice raises in pitch) eye on you Nope, still locked, ok, that's still locked Ok, I'm just gonna skirt around you---a little bit... Keeping my eye on you! Whooa- FUck hi! WH-I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT Whoa-ok-alright-I I- wanted to. Oh, Jesus-- oh no I'm trying to go. I'm trying *Mumbles* Oh Fuck... Okay... Well, I don 't wanna attack... I don't have to be de- ah-fu-ye-he! sorry SORRY! I'll just spray some goop juice on it Ah, fucking. COME ON! Oh geez, why do I have to kill her? Do I have to?! No, I'm gunna run. No, I'm gunna run for it. I'm gunna run for it... Oh geez... Oh! I was gunna run for it... *says weakly* I was gunna run for it! *Scared, shocked, and confused. He stares as the blood pours onto the carpet...* I was gunna fuckin' run for it! I was gunna run for it! I didn't wanna be a part of this. I wanted to get the fuck out! Oh jesus I guess that I had no choice? I dunno She was gunna kill me? I dunno I don't even know how to describe it- it's like- she's trying to attack me with this wooden stake And I just open a drawer Yeah that's good idea Markiplier Why didn't you do that in the first place? That would dissuade any attacker. Um, yes? Hello? I just killed my uh, ex-wife? I guess she was still my wife. I didn't divorce her or something... shit Fuck Okay Alrighty then Hello? I'm well aware of that... *Mutters* Okay... Okay thank you Zoe! That is very helpful in my current situation! [noises in house] fucking fucking fucking fuuuuck *quietly* hi hi, how are you? Okay, Alright then. Okay, alright then. There's blood on my screen... Does that mean that I'm dablidged? Oh shoot she better still be there... She's not there Oh *Whispers* Fuuuuuuuccckk Ohohohohohohoho Oh fuck dude Oh fuck dude! Oh boy... Well I guess I don't feel as bad now... I guess now, I don't have to worry about her actually being dead! *whispers* fuck Should I use my first aid medicine, or should I hold off on that? God! Who would have thought- Oh fuck! She did get away! I mean- I guess, that's good Is that good? I mean- I think that's good... At least now I'll be able to watch the video again, but my god! This game is wild... And I love it. Fuck this. Let's watch this. Oh shit Alright then Here we go Let's- You know after I... almost kill my wife Let's just watch something Oh this is. Dulvey Haunted House- Rehearsal So, is it the same exact thing? A-boo. Yeah, it is Ohh! So- Wait!- I've seen this before! Wait. Then that means the way I unlock the drawer, is through this So, what I'm gunna do is I'm gunna what I needed to do to get the secrets in this game, and then try to unlock them. For me in the future And I'm gunna see if that fuckin' works 'cuz, if that does, Then that's legitimately cool. 'Cuz, that's using knowledge from the demo, and knowing that the demo, effects things outside of the demo's reality, is just legitimately cool. Ah. Man. I think... There used to be a lock pick here There was like a lock pick and you could unlock The thing- But that doesn't mean that it's not there, it could be there in the present. I think, really, the only reason this tape is still here, Is to teach you about the level. So I don't know if it's a hundred percent useful... 'Cuz there wasn't the- uh, There was definitely not the thing that I needed there... Yeah, thanks... Yeah, I'm already all the way down there... hello... oh shit. I see my buddy yee... yee... *FUCK AHHH NOoH* *Screaming* YEup, that's no good. But, it's exactly as I remember. So the lock pick wasn't there. And there was no benefit to doing it before, because the fuse was no longer there. Because originally in the demo if you opened the game early and you opened this early there was a fuse waiting for you over here Now, I'm not gonna back down there, so what I gotta do Is I gotta figure out a way to get that Fuse #1 Because I gotta get upstairs to the attic because that's what the *pause* Zoe anyway told me to do, so that's what I intend to do At least I have an axe *swings axe against door* I don't know what Imma be able to do with it, I cant exactly chop anything down But maybe I can open a drawer to..? YEESH ;3 *Whispers* Okay Yeah, so I gotta be able to get up there, it's a lot brighter than I remember it being in the Derelict House Footage So that is saying something and I can definitely, probably save! Probably a good idea to save And now Mia is not dead and someone by the name of Zoe is telling me to get out of the house But somehow through the attic I'm gonna be able to do that I don't entirely understand how that works, and I still don't understand why it's suddenly ...Night. Could you not, buddy? GOD DAMNIT THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT TO DO Alright, anyway I splashed some goop juice on me and hopefully I'm a little bit better But yeah there's still no... ...there's still no lockpick here Hmm.... *Mark is thinking* *More angry Hmmmmm* Gumpy bumpkin, okay. Fuck was that? The fuck just happened there? What the fuck was that? Okay then.. Oh, I'm pushing the chairs. Jesus christ. Okay, man why did I come in here? I know she's my wh....well that sounds bad I know she's my wife and all, but do I really need to do that? Oh boy.. So I remember vaguely doing this *voice goes quieter* in the demo so Well there you have it then! So there's the fuse! That still doesn't answer the question of how to unlock the thing, but lemme just go down here just a little bit Because I just kinda wanna see what I'm dealing with here Now, I definitely can't go outside, can I?! Nope, it's very locked Let me just slap my goop hand on there, yup, that is locked... But now I have the Fuse for the staircase so I can put this in the fusebox and then I should duh fuckin hi!!!!! What the fuck? HI!!!! How are you doin'? Okay, alright, that's totally fine, that's a normal occurrence. She's just wandering around with a neck wound.... Jeez, and who was she saying was in her head? Like that was obviously something bad happening... Obviously I think it has to do with this..the embodiment of this little girl that was in the picture oh fuckin!!! I DON'T TRUST YOU!!!!! I SEE THAT KNIFE!!!!!! Oh boy!!!! Okay, alright then!!!! Would some goop juice make you feel better? I can IMAGINE!!!! Oh, not AGAIN!!!!! Again?!?!?!?! AGAIN????!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY?????!!!!! AGAIN????? Come on!!!!!! Do it, dude!!!!! Oh jeez...... Oh, c'mon!!!!! Well ain't this a bunch of bullshit...Oh, I gotta hold it down.... Oh jeez.... *More worried now* OH JEEZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Uh.....Hi!!!!! I-I didn't mean to do that...okay that's-that's not good.... What the fuck? I JUST LOST MY ARM!!!!! NO GOOP JUICE IS GONNA FIX THIS! I don't have any goop juice left! What the fuck??? I'm just holding my arm out! What the fuck am I gonna do???? I'm about to bleed out, my arm is just spewing blood! What the fuck!!!!!!! I imagine there was no way to stop that, even though I was a little delayed on the... the other aspect of it Oh no, *Sarcastic* My arm is just gonna stop bleeding I'm gonna save, but Imma save in a different spot... 'Cuz holy shit!!! What the fucking fuck!!!!! Man, I have no idea what's going on here, I have no idea why I'm just wandering around with my arm fucking cut off! By my wife no less! But magically, I'm still alive, somehow.... Oh good handgun ammo...Oh good a gun!!!! That woulda been helpful!!!! Can I spray some goop juice on this? Is that gonna help me? Good, I have a gun! *Tough guy Mark voice* Okay, fine!!!! Myehhhh Myehhhhhh Can I spray goop juice...aw nah... Okay then Alright, well... Now that I have a...oh fucking hi... How you doin'? *whispers* fuck Alright then... This does not bode well for me, but this door is now unlocked... Oh, fucking Hi!!!!! Why???? At least I'm getting ammo, it's like...well f... there was just ONE of you I SWEAR THERE WAS JUST ONE OF YOU!!!!! AND NOW THERE'S TWO!! I KNOW HOW TO COUNT TO TWO!!!!! *Mumbles* I don't like that.... I don't like that, and I don't like you.... *Whispers* I don't like any of you.... *Mumbles* I'm gonna be through with... Fuck you guys *Takes deep breath* Oh boy, okay Yup, just gonna carry my wounded ass over here... Fuck, man. Well, more ammo If this is that....ooooo .....hiiiiii? Is there anything here? Can I-I know I'm probably able to... yeah Okay... Uh....yeah Can I break these? Yeah, I can. Are they gonna have anything in them? Alright, okay, Alright. Okay, there's still only, ahhhh, here we go... UMMMMMM MAYBE YOU WANNA TURN AROUND!!!!! Oh, OH maybe I wanna turn around, holy shit!!!! What the fuck!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! Oh fuck!!!!! Oh boy, oh boy, I'm not..this ain't good... Fuckin don't mind me while I fucking reload here!!!! Who is she and why must she be contained??? I'M TRYING!!! Fucking god damnit, how can you reload??? I'm so slow!!!! Jesus, okay, can I get out of here? Oh I can!!!! Okay, alright then... I'm not hiding anything. Alright What are you talking about? "What don't you want me to know?" I have no idea what you wanna know! Uh-oh.. Well, that's no good... Jesus...I'm trying to hit her in the head as much as possible... Conserving my ammo Whoa. ...You love me?????? You lo- oh shit... I shot her enough I think.... Jeez, maybe that's for the best, but maybe she's not gonna stay down this time... I fucking axed her in the neck ...and she got back up... Maybe she can never die...? ...is that good or bad? Oh fuck what was that? ...okay? Ohhhhh AW FUCKING GOD DAMNIT!!!! fucking what the fuck??? Does that mean my head got stomped in??? Am I dead?? Is Ethan dead? Am I gonna play another character now?? What the hell is going on here? Oh no!!! Am I alive...? How?! Oh jeez... Oh no.... oh no... That's not good... Well that's not good at all Yeesh... Alrighty then.... let's see what happens.... Do I have work to do? Oh n-*surprised* oh!!! Wait, why do I have a hand???? It's not an unfair question for me to ask... why I have a hand... when I clearly saw it being cut off.... what the fuck... Y-yeah... *Takes breath in* Woah.... What the fuck!!! Oh boy.... I DON'T WANNA DO THIS!!!!!! I DON'T WANNA DO THIS!!!! I'D RATHER NOT DO THIS OHHHH.... I don't even know what that is... Oh what the fuck?????!!!! What the fuck!!!! *Whispers* What the fuck.... what the fuck?! What the FUUUUCK?! Hi Grandma.... How are ya doing Grandma? Bye Dad! I guess... ...okay.... what the fuuuuck.... I have no god damn idea what's going on here... this is absolutely insane....HI GRANDMA, you changed!!!! Now you're smiling your beautiful smile... Oh....holy shit... okay alright then, let's just lie down and take a nap... I guess.... what the hell.... How do I have an arm back? 'Cuz I distinctly have an arm back... Right there! see wait.. it's-it's right, it's lemme slap it on the wall here... yeah, it's right there, jesus christ.... Is that someone else's arm or what?? And why is Grandma still there? And why didn't I eat my supper? I have a lot of questions to ask. I mean, it looks almost nice here... ""The Unveiled Abyss" By Clive R. O'Brien" "Three Missing During Urbex Trip" *the rest of what he reads is currently on screen* Well, we know what happened to them.... And I'm pretty sure they all died... Oh, good, more handgun ammo!! Do I have a handgun? No, I do not. Oh boy... Nothin' in there.... This is so bizarre... And this is not what I was expecting when it came to this "Niko's Hardware" Saw, Rope, Pet Collar... That's a lot of oooo...oh, twenty!!!! Twenty pet collars... Why do they need twenty pet collars? Oh... Hi Grandma. Oh Grandma... Oh Grandma, you're alive... Or whatever you can assume being alive is in this fucked up world... *Grossed out noises* Hi Grandma, hi Grandma! "Where's my mower? Has anybody seen my...leg?" *Nervous giggles* Oh, FUCK. What the fuck IS that? It's like some kind of mixture of entrails and the black goop that was on..Mia's like driver's license... I think... ugh, roaches everywhere... Good God... Welp, there's my heart signal or something like that... I've no idea... I guess that's my he- Oh my god!!! They did!!! They stitched on a different hand!!!! How the fuck??? Is it my hand??? And there's a splotch on it right there...probably from decomposition... If I just had to guess... (it's from the knife wound) Wildly... Jesus... Some kind of boot... Let's see... "Eveline," Eveline? (Pronounced: Eveleen then Evelin) Something like that...? There's something in there "Smiley" Something smiley... Yeesh.... YEESH Yeesh, yeesh, yeesh. Okay...oh, what is on the flo- oh god... *more grossed out noises* Why...? Fine, what did I just get? Oh, herb, ohhhhh okay... That's that's typical to the Resident Evil games is herbs... Stuff that you can use to heal your health, like that's very typical of the Resident Evil Games I'm looking for a save point right now and I think I *gasps, scared* Hi, Dad... Hello.... Ah fuckin- God dammit! Aw, fuck! I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA BE ABLE TO SAVE! Aw shit...aw shit, aw shit, OH GRANDMA'S GONE!!! OH GREAT!!! Ah fuck, ah fuck, ah fuck, ah fuck I didn't mean to... *Tough Guy Mark Voice* Yeah, fuck it!!! Alright, fine then... You give up quite easily... Alright then... Man, that is an angry person Did you just go right to sweeping his broom??? Jesus... YEESH He's over there...I think he's coming through that door... I don't want that. Why would you do that? I just wanna save... AH FUCKING FUCKING FUCKING FUCK!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK?! I DON'T WANNA WASTE MY TIME!!! *Scared noises* Jesuuuus!!!! Okay, alright, okay alright, okay alright, okay alright *more scared noises* LOOK A KEY!!! IT'S A HATCH KEY!!!! LOOK A THIS, I dunno what this is... Someone's face was crossed out... Okay, I think I got away a little bit, ah fuck, is this gonna work? Nope, no key *gasps* oooo shit, ooo shit, who's this? Ah shit, "crazy husband and wife from before but they look a lot less crazy" Let's see... *reads the current writing on screen* That's probably the "son," ...from the "dinner." But either way I have a hatch key now, which means that I probably... Will be able to get out through... *pauses while "Daddy" taunts him* ...this. Aw fuck, it's barb wired up! How am I gonna be able to get out there? Uh...Hatch Key? Yes? Yes! Okay! Now I can get out, yes! Yes, I can... gogogogogogo *scared noises* Okay Alright, very quiet, very stealth like Okay... Now let's get outta here. Fuck...at least i have a flash light somehow... Don't ask me how because I have no idea... It seems weird that the, like... he's just willing to bash through his own fucking wall to be able to get to this guy That's so bizarre. Oh man... Oh, I found your MOWER! Dude, I found your mower! It's down here in the HATCH! Where no one would think to find it... Alongside an antique coin... Weird... Alright, so there's gotta be some kind of way outta here now... I mean, I don't know why I'm following an electrical cord here, what does this lead to? Where did this go? I guess it would be foolish of me to think that this would lead out of here... Jeez... oh eh eh.... So if I press space for some reason I fucking block my face....why? Why does that do that? If I don't wanna look at what I'm looking at, if I'm too scared to do that Oh!!!! Save!!!! Perfect.... Okay!!!!!! UGHHHHH, alright, okay, so that is Resident Evil, I am really interested in seeing the end of this game I wanna play more more more more of this game because I am fascinated by this, and this is a welcome departure from the action-oriented game style that it was getting into over the past three games Four was great, uh, but I didn't play Five and Six just because, I don't know I was kinda turned off from the overly action elements and the jacked Chris Redfield version of it But either way, I'm really looking forward to see what's going on in this, because it seems totally different than the Resident Evil of previous incarnations, even down to what is going on with the people. Does this have to do with the Virus? Does this have to do with something else? Who is the person that was infecting Mia's mind? We'll find out soon, very, very soon, but I wanna know what you guys think of this, so let me know down in the comments below. I very much look forward to getting your opinions on it, so thank you everybody so much for watching, and as always.... I will see you, in the next video! Buh-bye!
This game is messed up , some impressive game graphics and twisted horror/gore.
Holy crap we've come a long way!
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I was going to watch it once I got off of work, but I'm fighting a cold and I feel like I don't want to have nyquil fueled-resident evil dreams tonight.
http://imgur.com/gallery/NnoGhN1
This is going to be like Alien Isolation. I'm not watching it because I don't want the game ruined for me. See you all in a few years when this game is on sale for $15 or something! lol
Finally. A game that Mark plays that I am legitimately terrified to watch. This was awesome! Episode 2 was great as well!
I'm really excited to see Mark play. I'm too much of a chicken to do it myself so I'm glad I can still experience it.
This doesn't feel like Resident evil, but it seems like a great game.
I really want to watch Mark and Jack play this, but I've been so hyped to play it myself... This is a dilemma...