(rooster crows) (lion roars) - Welcome to Good Mythical More. We are here to help you
make sense of your break up. - But first, we're going
to name that squad. What do you call a group of hamsters? - Hamsters. A bourgeoisie of hamsters? - Boy, I don't think they travel in herds. - I think it's uh, - Have you ever seen a herd of hamsters? I mean, herd is actually
not a bad word for, - Clump, clump of hamsters, final answer. - I think it's a clutch. - Clutch? - A clutch, a clutch of hamsters. - Okay, the answer is, - Hoard. - A hoard of hamsters. - They love the alliteration. A hoard of hamsters, man. A hoard of hamsters just seems very cute. - [Stevie] Do you guys remember when you learned the word hoard? - Yeah, it was like, it was
the He-Man spinoff character. - [Stevie] Oh,
- And I was like, - [Stevie] I just remember, 'cause it sounds like another word and the time when I
learned it we were like, there's a hoard in the hallway. (laughs) - Yeah, right; yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - [Stevie] And obviously, referring to the He-Man character. - So it's the past tense of, - They're comin' out
with a new He-Man movie? - Yeah, Masters of the Universe. - You told me about, is
Dolph Lundgren still in it? - I know no details. I just know that in 2021,
it is slated to be released. - Well, good luck with that. I want, who is in it? Could somebody look that up? Okay, so Stevie's gonna read real life break up scenarios,
that you submitted. We're gonna handle these
lightly, delicately. We're gonna be gentle with you because these are your real stories, Mythical Beasts, of
breaking up with people. And we're gonna decide if it was your fault or theirs, right? - [Stevie] Yeah, yeah,
that's the entire point. - Okay, let's hear the first one. We'll come back.
- [Stevie] Okay. - We'll come back to the He-Man of it all. - [Stevie] This is from Hannah, from Halt Lake City, (laughs) - Oh, Halt Lake City. - [Stevie] Salt Lake City. - Okay. - [Stevie] When I was a teenager, my first boyfriend broke up with me over MSN Messenger by saying, he thought I had a great
personality, but quote, I just can't get used
to looking at your face. I never saw or heard from him again. I've been happily married for years now, but it's still the one that ticks me off. - Appropriately, he did it over Messenger. - Why would that tick you off? That someone, over Messenger, would say they can't get
used to looking at your face. Is that what he said? - [Stevie] I just can't get
used to looking at your face. - Can't get used to looking at your face. - I don't know if that's the, - [Stevie] TTYL. - I don't know if that is the standard that you're looking for in a relationship, is getting used to
looking at someone's face. (laughing) - But if you can't that's, - That is a problem. - I think that is good grounds
to break up with somebody. - I can't really settle
in to just, you know, - [Both] Looking at your face. - [Stevie] That's a nice vow. I promise to get used
to looking at your face. To grow old together. - If you're at a wedding. - [Stevie] Why MSN Messenger? Was that something I missed out on? Was that like a specific time period, - I had one of those. - [Stevie] That was not AIM. - I think that was like
a Hotmail era type thing. - I definitely had an MSN name. - Cause Hotmail is MSN and then they introduced the Messenger. - [Stevie] Okay, so this is like, - I never used 'em. - [Stevie] Maybe she's in her forties, maybe late thirties, situation. - Yeah, she's, and she has a face. - I will say, my
assessment of this is that, this guy could have been a
little bit more sensitive. Even though he was trying to be sensitive, in saying something in
it, that is insensitive. You know, - Yeah, how? - He was making a, he was making a judgment of her physicality by trying to take the edge off of that. And that's when he got into this weird, I can't get used to looking at your face. - It's such a strange thing to say. That's so heartless. - But it is consistent
with doing it on Messenger. 'Cause if he can't get used
to looking at her face, he doesn't want to see her face when he's breaking up with her. - She's happily married now. - Right. - You know, she's moved on. Someone else is happily
looking at her face. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - [Stevie] I don't know
if she has moved on, 'cause she says, it's still the one that ticks me off. She pissed about it. - I get it. - Rightfully so. - Yeah, you definitely should hold on to this for the rest of your life. (giggles) - I really want to know, - If that's what you're
asking, don't let go of this. - Don't let go of it. - Definitely. (giggles) - I mean, what is the response? Like, looking at your face hasn't been a cake walk. Looking at your cake hole, hasn't been a cake walk. How about that? - I think we solved that one. - [Stevie] No, you wait, what? What did he say? So it's his fault. - Yeah, it's his fault. He's a jerk. - It's his fault. - [Stevie] It's not her face's fault. - She should hold a permanent grudge. - Yeah, never get over it. - I mean, I haven't seen her face. - [Stevie] Okay. This is from, - Maybe we should look at her face. (chuckles) I'm just being honest. Maybe I'll have, maybe
I'd enjoy lookin' at it. And then that would
really clear things up. - Well, you'd get used to it. - I'd get used to it. (laughing) It's horrible. I'm sorry that happened to you. And that I'm making it worse. (Stevie laughs) - [Stevie] This is B from Boston. - B from Boston. - [Stevie] I had an online relationship, up, theme here, theme here,
with someone I met on a game. And then, one of the emojis where you're putting your hand over your face. I don't know what you call them. - A little embarrassed. - [Stevie] We clicked instantly
and became very close. One day, he told me he was diagnosed with a terminal illness
and only had weeks to live. About five weeks after the diagnosis, I received a text from his sister, which is in quotes, on his phone, saying that he died. He posted on Instagram, three weeks later, that he was so excited
to leave for college. Did some digging and found, he didn't know how to break up with me, and that faking death was easier. He married his first cousin in January. (Stevie laughs) - That one had a twist. - You dodged a bullet. You dodged a couple bullets. - I mean, dude returns from the dead and then incestuates. - Yeah, even if you haven't gotten, used to looking at his face, - Different person. - It would have been, this
would have been problematic. - I mean, what a scandalous
life this guy's livin'. - Faked his own death
and then went to college. - Does he even have a sister? - Well college is a death of sorts. It's a death of adolescence. - [Stevie] That's the most perplexing. - Yeah, that's the defense. - [Stevie] He went to college. - You know, all I meant by that was, that my adolescence has died. - Yeah, I was becoming an adult. - All that my sister meant by that, Oh my gosh. - Married his first cousin. I mean third cousin, - Breakin' up is hard to do. I mean sometimes, I
mean, I'm not gonna lie, I've thought about fakin' my own death. 'Cause it, I mean, it just seems like, it's the last thing you want to do. Ah, of course, who am I lyin'? What's the phrase? Who am I lying? Who am I kidding? - Who am I lying? - Huh, I was only broken up with, like I don't, did I ever
break up with anybody? I'm lookin' at you? I think, me and am I sayin' names? Are we done with that? - I mean, I probably wouldn't say a name. - I think me and, let's see, the taller girl that I
dated in high school. - The taller girl. - I broke up with her, I think. - I think you did break up with her. - Is that when I died
for like, a little while? - Yeah, right, yeah. (laughing) And then, the thing
with your first cousin. (laughs) That didn't really go anywhere. (laughing) I want, I mean, I did, - And then, my other girlfriend, - I met like a second or third cousin. - We mutually broke up. - When I was a teenager, I had never met this second or third cousin, who was a girl, who was my age. And I thought she was attractive. But yeah, that's all that. You know, I never got used to her face 'cause it was my cousin. (laughing) Third cousin, I mean, people would get married to their third cousins without knowing it all the time. If you go on 23 and me, you'll see how many third cousins you got. You got thousands of third cousins. (whispers) Thousands. And many'a y'all are
married and having kids. - Oh God, really? Is that the point of the service? I think that should be the point of this. - Yeah, avoid, - Make sure you're not
mating with a cousin. - Yeah. - Ancestry.com. - At what point is it no
longer a medical liability? That's the real question. (laughs) Is third cousin no longer
a medical liability? - Well, it's, - Or is it, fourth cousin? I mean fourth cousin is like, we're probably fourth cousins. I mean, I'm saying once you get to like fourth, fifth, we're all related. - This is a slippery slope you're on, sir, and I am not joining you. We have another one? - [Stevie] Yeah, so I mean,
it was his fault then I guess - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely. - [Stevie] That's another
pattern that we're saying. - You gotta, listen, you got, - [Stevie] It was his fault. Do you see that pattern? You gotta break up, - Oh God. - You gotta be honest, but not too honest. That's what we're learning so far. And you gotta be alive. - [Stevie] Katie, Katie,
from Fredonia, New York. I don't know if I said that right. Fred-onia, Fredonia. I like that name. - Why? Fred-onia. It was Valentine's day, my BF took me out to a hibachi restaurant, - Yes. - [Stevie] and we were seated at one of the big hibachi tables with a few other random couples. (Link snaps his fingers) Oh my God, it's so awkward. That experience like, oh ga', I couldn't handle it. I couldn't, sorry. - You gotta just embrace the strangers. - If you're the minority of the table, if you're not holding majority at a hibachi table, then you've lost. - [Stevie] Yeah, after a little while, he decides to break up with me, right then and there. Everyone at the table realized what's going on and it was mortifying. But then, the staff saw
me crying and us talking, brought the entire staff out. - And they threw you a shrimp. - [Stevie] and they started
clapping and gave us a plate with a dessert and congratulations written in chocolate thinking he just proposed. (laughs) - Oh my gosh. - Oh, I'm not laughin' at you. I'm just laughing at the situation. - This is incredible. - Oh dang. - There's nothin' wrong with this. - No shrimp flying through the air into your mouth can fix that problem. - Was it before or
after the onion volcano? That's really what I want to know. - Oh my gosh, yeah. 'Cause that's like the Men
in Black memory eraser. Once you see that you can see, (crosstalk) - Oh, - Anything before that moment, yeah. - Oh my gosh, I am so sorry. - I think it's pretty funny. I mean, I am sorry. - Yeah, it's hilarious. (laughing) - But, it is an incredibly funny story. - That is crazy. So, I mean, what kind of dummy? - Anybody who would bring a
break up with you at a hibachi? - Well, you know, you're
eating dinner with strangers. - I saw a couple break up at, - Why would you do it at that moment? - a breakfast place, a breakfast place, - [Stevie] Mm, morning after situation. - in Mammoth. - Oh, really? Somebody was skiin'? - And they were just, it was, so, this is kinda funny. It was a couple, sitting
across from each other and they're in it, just, and he's like, trying to like, talk his way out of
something and she's crying. She doesn't eat any of her food. He eats all his food. (laughs) He's arguing with her
whole time, she's crying. He starts eating her food. (both laugh) Such a guy thing. Like we're in the middle - If this is our last meal. - of this emotional thing, but like, you ain't touched those waffles girl. (laughs) - Are you sure this wasn't you? - Hey, it was not me. - You were watching this happen. Your whole family. - Okay. - [Stevie] You walked up, started clapping - So, - [Stevie] and said, congratulations. (Link slow-claps) - It was one of those situations where we had to sit separately. So, we were hanging out
with another family. And so, Jesse and I were
with the mom and the dad from the family at a table, and our kids were all sitting together,
right next to them. - Next to the break up? - Yeah, and so, I had gone over there and they had told me about it and I could like, I could hear them from where I was, but
they heard everything. So we leave the restaurant, and like Locke and his
friend are like telling me, like, this is what they
were fighting about. And like, he's a complete,
this guy's a complete jerk. - What was the issue? - I don't even remember, it's been, a couple of years. So then, we're sitting there, waiting for some of our crew to come out of the bathroom and the couple leaves the restaurant. They start walking away and like, they've kind of made up a little bit. Like, it seems like maybe he talked his way out of the hole
he had dug himself. (Rhett giggles) So then, they're walking,
in the parking lot and she's walking a little bit away. He likes, stops, picks up, gets some snow. Makes a snowball and throws it. And she turns around
right when he throws it. It hits her right in the
face and she falls down. - What? (Rhett laughs) Are you serious? - And it was like, he was like, I'm trying to have fun with you. And then she starts crying again. (Link laughs) And then he goes over, and he's like, - In the face. - he's like, I'm sorry,
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - I was trying to hit you
in the back of the head. - This guy's such an idiot, man. Men are stupid.
- Oh, gosh. - Guys, I mean, that's just what we're discovering here. - And hungry. - Yeah, always willing to eat. - [Stevie] It was his fault. - Yeah, definitely his fault, yeah. - Oh my gosh. - [Stevie] Alyssa, from Pittsburgh. I broke up with my high school boyfriend on a date at a park. Unfortunately, he was still my ride home. Instead of going straight
back to my house, he drove to another
park, through a carwash and all around town. I was trapped as he cried and tried to convince me why we shouldn't break up. - Oh, the carwash is really, that's a tricky one. - [Stevie] I, this reminds me of, I was such a jerk and I broke up with a girl and then I locked myself outta my apartment and then she had to help me go and get back in to my apartment. - Like moments after the break up? - [Stevie] Like literally, - Like you were on the steps. - [Stevie] Yes, I was on the steps, - Breaking up with her, - [Stevie] And then I realized, yes. - But you didn't take her to a carwash. - [Stevie] Then I was like, oh my gosh, I can't get back into my apartment. And then she helped me. And I broke up with
her, one of the reasons I broke up with her was
'cause she was too nice to me. (all laughing) - You're too nice, yeah, so it was like, she was like, - [Stevie] She's so awesome. She's not watching this, but I'm so sorry. (laughing) - She was too nice. Oh sure, I'll help you get in your house. - So,
- Was she your cousin? - Ironically, you broke up with her. - [Stevie] No, I don't think so. - And then, the reason
why you broke up with her made her the perfect person to be there, for you, in that moment. (Stevie laughs) - [Stevie] Yeah. - If you're gonna break up with somebody, make it a nice person. You know what I'm saying? That's the moral of the story; if you're gonna break up with somebody, break up with somebody
who's not gonna go crazy, who's still gonna help you. - If you're gonna break up with someone, have an exit plan that
doesn't involve them. - Yeah, or a carwash. - So,
- or a hibachi. - Submitter of that, that's your problem. - I do think a hibachi meal, is a good post break up meal. - So, we gotta girl. - [Stevie] Yeah, this is her fault. - A girl made a mistake. - [Stevie] Yeah, yeah, that's true. - That's her fault. Before we hear the next one. - [Stevie] And I did, too. - Quick, quick response from me, wow! And a quick promotion from me. - Oh. - If you want the, (laughing) if you want the Rhett and Link - Who am I lyin'?
- Bobble-heads, the last collectible item of the quarter, of the
year, of 2020, you gotta be a 3rd Degree Quarterly or Annual member. If you're not already a 3rd Degree member, you've got to sign up for Quarterly or Annual by December 31st in order to be eligible for that. mythicalsociety.com is where
you get all the details. Can't be Monthly 3rd Degree if you're not already, to get it. You gotta be Quarterly or Annual. - [Stevie] Okay, you're not gonna believe this story, is from Z, from unknown. I was dating a girl last year who I've met through college and happened to share
most classes with me. Never date someone in the
same classes, awkward. Anyways, after five months of dating, she ended up secretly getting engaged to her cousin, gross, but
happens where I'm from, while still dating me and without telling me a single word. After I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me of having some sort of an open relationship, question mark, question
mark, question mark. I broke up with her immediately after. - Don't you want to be in a relationship with me and my cousin? (laughing) I mean, I surprise! - I mean, it's like,
we're so close already. - I mean, but it's like Rhett said, I mean, we're all cousins. - Yeah, we're all cousins guys. - According to Rhett, there's no problem dating cousins, because
we're all already doing it. - I didn't say that. - According to Rhett. - Didn't say that, exactly. I think that's what, that was his stance. His stance was dating your cousins, not a big deal. - I think there's a, - Like the person said, it happens a lot. - There's a threshold. - Because we're all doing it. - There's a threshold. And, also depends, if you're
repopulating the earth. At that point, all bets are off. - If you're in like a
post-apocalyptic situation? - Yeah, yeah, you can't worry about first cousins at that point. I think you, I think you would, - Why would you keep it, well, I know why you'd keep it secret. - I think he missed a
great opportunity here. (laughing) I think you're gonna
be thinkin' about this. The one that got away. (laughs) - I mean the, - For a long time. - the phrase, can we look up the origin of the phrase, kissing cousins? Because the phrase brings to mind something totally innocuous. - Careful when you Google that. - [Stevie] I think that the origin's like pretty clear. No!
- Kissing cousins means something, I don't know what it is. - [Stevie] I thought it
was cousins who kiss. - Two or more things that are
closely akin or very similar. For example, they may be made
by different manufacturers but these two cars are kissing cousins. - Yeah. - This metaphoric term alludes to a distant relative who
is well known enough to be greeted with a kiss. - It's like a, it's like a Acura and a, - Distant relative well known enough to be greeted with a kiss. So it's not making out cousins. - It's like a Acura and a Honda. Kissing cousins, you know. - I think hugging cousins would evoke more of what this now means. - {Stevie] Okay, this is the final story. Quinn from New York City. My girlfriend at the time, I don't know what time but at the time. - When they were together. - [Stevie] Took me on a romantic trip to the Mediterranean and then dumped me over text after we got back. She was always a really big GMM fan. So Kaylee, if you see
this, you broke my heart. I hope you're happy
with that other (bleep) You two-timing Gemini bastard. How about you thirst over me, huh? Instead of Rhett and Link, huh? I hope you choke on your (laughs) I don't know this word, COPiCs. Anyway, love the show. (Rhett laughs) - Choke on your own coccyx? - I don't understand, - That's your tailbone. - Could you say all that again? I don't know. - No, don't. - [Stevie] It says COPiC,
choke on your COPiCs. - COPiCs. (laughing) COPiCs, that's the stuff
you put in your hair. - He got so angry by the end of it, he was making up words. I don't know what it is, just choke on it. - Trip to the Mediterranean, huh? Well, doesn't get much better than that. Maybe she used to be, - [Stevie] Oh, Davin says it's a Japanese brand of refillable markers and related products. - I don't think that's what, - [Stevie] How would you choke on that? - Oh, I could, you know, I'm sure you could. - Why don't you choke on a Japanese brand of refillable markers? - [Stevie] I hope you
choke on your COPiCs. - They might be like, a choking hazard. (Link laughs) - [Stevie] Hear that, Kaylee? - Kaylee. - Hey Kaylee, thanks
for watchin' the show. - We're mailing you,
we're mailing you some Japanese refilla- re-somethin' markers. - We're gonna give you
a year supply of COPiCs. - [Voice] Join the 3rd Degree, Quarterly or Annual plan of the Mythical Society by December 31st, to get the
Rhett and Link bobble-heads. Visit mythicalsociety.com for details.
