Top Gear News: Season 12 (Best Moments)

it has come to this let's do the news as i said right the news and of course we have been off the air for a while god he is such a child yeah where is he i don't know in the audience and we're flicking people's ears blaming people next excuse me cool you were you wearing that for a bit yeah uh anyway lewis hamilton he's done it world [Music] twice on the trot yeah still never mind lewis next year third time lucky why do we record this on a wednesday i have no idea if we did it on a sunday we'd know that by now i know it's just the end of the world i tell you what if we recorded on a sunday we'd know who'd one strictly come dancing and then we could tell everybody uh now okay there's been a financial crisis is the first time you've heard of it well in essence as far as i can work out is that i think because we were off the air everyone got bored so banks started lending money they hadn't got to other banks that gave the non-existent money to mexicans in southern california who couldn't pay it back and now as a result of that your cars are all worthless yeah i think what i've done there is summarize the financial crisis quite well off nicely i was having dinner the other night with a man and we were talking about the financial problems and he said he bought a volkswagen fate on okay the five liter v10 okay paid 60 000 pounds for it 18 months ago just been offered 17. how that's 85 pounds a day depreciation on a volkswagen you're going to feel that you wake up in the morning i'm 85 pounds worse off and haven't even started yet i can beat that oh really yes the aston martin v8 vantage a nice one 88 000 pounds list price we know somebody's got one of these actually yeah we do it's um hang on it's it's not uh oh no it's the clarkson that's it i knew i knew somebody i'm not going to enjoy this oh do carry on please no a car just like yours the one you've got it was 88 000 pounds new with a few extras on it guess how much that was worth a year later 44 000 oh if it's value gold halved it's the only one here got a va vantage well you're all better off as a result has anybody here got a vanquish here yeah no because they're here james that's very true um that's even worse that's 175 000 pounds guess how much that car was worth after 10 000 miles guess how much you got for it no idea fifty thousand pounds that's a hundred and twenty five grand in ten thousand yep so that means if he's near his shop is two miles away and he pops out for a pint of milk that's fifty quid yeah just because of them 50 pounds that's 50 pounds in depreciation that doesn't include you know tire wear petrol insurance milk that's a lot you see i get my milk from the back of a cow it's much cheaper the back of it that's not milk i'm not going to let them away it's not just aston's okay mercedes-benz cl600 the big coupe yeah 2004 yeah how much do you think is worth now well that's well it depends on a million things like is it baby diarrhoea brown no it's black as it did one million miles no it's done thirty thousand miles so a four-year-old there were a hundred grand those things about four years ago about a hundred grand yeah so a hundred thousand pounds four years old thirty thousand miles in black with extras fifty fifty five sixteen sixty sixteen sixteen thousand he got 16 000 pounds for it i'd have given him 16 and a half i'd have gone to 17. are you watching yeah you sold it cheap i'll tell you exactly what's happened here all right since 1993 the whole world's been with flash cars anyway he's been playing musical chairs okay and the music's just stopped so whatever car you've got now all house that's it for life james bad news the dacia sandero the what the dacia sandero is not coming to the uk oh now uh british car british sports car makers heroic chaps and sheds they've always been able to pretty much melt your heart with their with their creativity with the fantastic swooping curves of any type jaguar or an aston martin db7 and now there's a new british sports car and here it is good grief it's out of the car on a shed he built it in with some wheels it's the jet stream sc250 it cost you thirty thousand pounds and is made in cornwall is it made out of tin no is he made out of drop of cream does it spend every night on harlem bay trying to snog public school girls while smoking marijuana none of these jokes are working with this audience but they are but they are my house yes i actually i have to say i do feel for the poor bloke who who's launched this because with the best will in the world and i do wish you all the best but i think frankly are you saying that all british sports car manufacturers who optimistically set up in a shed and think they can do better than porsche go bust what like tvr yes marcos yes strap carry yes yes yes ginetta no jeannette is still going they are well very well there's hope for him yet um it's really a report in the papers this week okay and in um shropshire somebody went to other speed cameras put a tire over it a blanket over the top of the whole ensemble and then poured petrol on it and set it to light okay fire brigade spokesman said it wasn't i'm quoting a deliberate attack now listen a lot of uh in the current financial crisis okay a lot of people won't be going on holiday next year to the caribbean or indeed anywhere even remotely exotic but don't worry because i think i've come up with a solution for you check it out it's a company in the isle of wight that's modified a citroen by fitting it with a hat yeah do you know it cost 19 000 pounds what's that is that a window or do you sort of unzip it climb it and then put your head through it look i've come as a citroen jesus it's like one of those things that ponti's gone kids stick your face through the citroen for 19 000 pounds for a sin for a citron cost and it only has one bed unfortunately then that means you can't have one i'm sorry what because i've got too much dignity no fatty you couldn't fit it i'm not interested i'm not bothered about that because honda has made an even better car right here it is now check that out what how does that work well basically these things the silver things kind of move up and down and operate your legs so for going upstairs or or even walking on level ground now guess who this is aimed at well i'm guessing people with disabilities with legs i mean that would be a no that's a clever technology wrong it's aimed at the able-bodied why it's the rotherham robot you don't even have to walk to the chip shop anymore now you just carried on that well what's the point in that oh hang on no how fast does it go i don't know because i was at school in rotherham i could have done with that in cross country if you had one of those mate i'd love to have the remote control for it yeah captain blur look at him oh james not in the scissor factory you'll hurt yourself can you kick yourself in the nuts yeah many times bang bang bang we're definitely going to get you one of those with a remote control yeah now jeff hoon okay is the transport minister yes and uh he announced this week that he wants to have more average speed cameras on the roads okay because he says they're good for safety and they reduce fuel consumption now this is the same jeff hoon who when he was defense secretary said and i'm quoting uh we know that saddam hussein has weapons of mass destruction though he must be right about the speed cameras as well then yes absolutely he's i tell you what he's done okay because he claims he goes on the m1 a lot in those road works you know round junction six eight they're up there they've been doing them for well since eighteen fifty forever yeah just been doing average speed cameras on that and he says well there you are you see there's hardly been any accidents that's because the roads are jammed up not moving then you can't crash when you're stationary soon though we'll be able to uh we'll have that tory transport bloke whose name is who it's a funny name from teresa villius how can you know that he is theresa whatever because there's only a finite amount of space for information in your head so if he's got that in it what's come out how to dress properly well done teresa so it's actually this man's a woman i think that's fascinating because she hasn't really got any policies across that we've ever seen that we've heard of obviously so we've had to come up with some of our own a better system than the average speed camera okay look at this so this is real this is in denmark look what they're doing there it's brilliant give me one good reason why that won't work yeah slow down i'd slow right there once again top gear rides to the rescue of the nation uh what's next guys i want to talk about aston martin brought out a new car it's uh the 177. here it is it's a striking looking thing i know and i think it goes to show just how in tune with the times aston martin are it really is a car for the moment 7.3 liter v12 oh i'm glad about that i must get a hundred calls a day from people saying i've got to have at least 7.3 liters until soon that's what i want right now very much of the moment absolutely price 1.2 million pounds oh and that's good literally this morning 30 people called up i'm not spending a penny more than 1.2 mil on the next car because as we know the world right now is full of stock brokers desperate for something to blow their enormous bonus on and there it is pretty soon aston martin are going to be selling more key rings than they are cars or making more money from them at least actually they say that they've that a hundred potential customers have written to them to express their interest a hundred yeah written in crayons great news they've done an off-road version of the dacia sandero don't be fooled by the renault badge that's the dacia that baby what the hell are you on about it's dacia it's a dacia i know it says round just said that if you've got a beard in your ears as well why do ginger people always grow more of it on their face they do can i just ask you see the show last week will young was the guest and i don't know if anybody else noticed but when he first sat there jeremy was not really bothered i didn't even know his name didn't know what to talk about next minute he's going all doe-eyed looking at him talking about interior design oh well i love cushions as well i'm having my house done out really and you had a mini their lovely will [Music] jeremy's in love are you suggesting will young is gay yeah yeah he is kidding yes is he to be honest it was beautiful to watch it's just my gaydar doesn't work as well as yours obviously that jacket how big was the bed pretty big okay i want you to look at this this is a field of unsold range rovers now do you know why they're unsold well nobody's got any money at the moment no look at the colors that's the range of color that land rover does now if you go down to home base to paint your walls they off you can have any color you like for a fiver actually you can go in with that jacket well maybe not you can go with this shirt and you could say i want that color but a bit more orange and they scan it with a thing exactly and it's just not good enough now look at this what i've got here is the audi brochure okay for the a8 a 70 000 car here okay range of colors available there you go then printed it in black and white that's it okay for an extra 2 400 pounds they will paint it in any color you like from that chart that's just a spectrum yes oh sir wants it in the visible light doesn't it if you want your car in color 2 400 pounds if you want in black and white it's just ridiculous well what you need to do look is by a bmw x5 because they understand this problem they have a special range which they call bmw individual the higher your standards the less room there is for compromise as an upshot of that they offer it in black silver silver and black gentlemen as you're getting all hot under your tweed collars about this can i just say i know a little bit about this and the reason that car manufacturers well they have to plan their paint colors years in advance because they have to test to make sure that each color works on the plastic say of the the bumpers and on the metal of the body on those two materials that you have the same they do what you say it has to be the same color whether it's on plastic or metal yes no because i was painting my sitting room the other day and the paint was exactly the same color on the wall as it was on the wooden skirting board and on my hand and on the solenoid shoe and subsequently on the stair carpet all exactly the same color can i just i really want to show you this this is the mercedes clk can you see down here these are soft top fabric okay yeah do you want to know what it says underneath cabriolet only oh i'm just gonna have that on my hard top now in a couple of weeks james is doing his first ever supercar test out on our track okay now shall we be honest james is not the fastest driver in the world nor does he have the best sense of direction so before letting him loose on our track in a very fast car we thought it would be a good idea for him to get some training so we said to him james go anywhere you like okay for your training just not finland i can't believe he got to drive that zonda it is my all-time favorite supercar it's just that mixture of sheer lunacy and engineering you could have driven it you were given the choice drive the zonda or sell fish for a northern supermarket and you chose the fish you can't seriously prefer the zonda to the bugatti i do because the zonda's got some pantomime to it the cat is just too controlled it's like sitting in a physics lesson were you watching that drag race yes did you see what the physics lesson did to your pantomime dame yes it annihilates a bit and hang on if we could just listen for a moment what's that i'm not hearing anyone not hearing that as well is anybody else not hearing the zonder being taken around the track by the stig for a lap i wonder if it's got anything to do with what happened this morning when it arrived here we go yes yes see it's a proper supercar i didn't just come down to the track and go around like a robot and be boring it came to the track and exploded immediately that's what supercars do it's proper even as we speak several stylish italian mechanics are looking at the engine in the zonda hoping they can coax some life into it and maybe just maybe later on we'll be able to bring you a lap of that as well and then we'll see zonda versus bugatti and we'll see then we'll sort it out right now we've always thought there's absolutely no reason for anyone to own a persia uh hang on see no i got anyone here got a peugeot yeah why who said who said yes there why have you got to peugeot it was given to you damn that's the reason what sort of peugeot is it 306. they're lovely no really apart from being given one i can't think of a single reason well the thing is persia have decided to address this and they think they have with this it's the partner tp no ah no bear with me you see here's the reason because they fitted it with a roof box which kind of goes inside over the seats like that and they say it's ideal for storing long thin things like a surfboard so what they're saying is if you are a surfer who wants a car with a loft you can keep your surfboard in yeah are there any surfers here yes there are who's a surfer do you like do you like to keep it dry because that's why it's how many surfers are there i don't want to get my surfboard wet it's just it's not going well isn't going well but peugeot fans this has a big brother called the expert tp there it is no no no no no listen they say that this is designed for the family the three children family where one child plays a drum kit one plays a tuber and one plays a double bass well they're not actually that specific about it yes they are well what sort of band are those kids in anyway the national youth salvation army dixieland jazz band orchestra of great britain why is it called a teepee that fascinates me that's the americans are going to come and steal it and let you build a casino where it used to be how much is it anyway oh i don't care i don't i just couldn't give a damn if your sister gives you one of those just say no all right just uh you know boris johnson okay mayor of london i was driving around behind a bus this week and i took a photograph of the message he's put on it okay this is from the mayor of london and it says amazing changing gears at lower res reduces your co2 emissions and saves you money i was then reading gq magazine okay a road test here of a ferrari 430 and it says the essence of it in my view is not to change up until you hit about 6 000 revs this was written by somebody called boris johnson jeremy yeah the slippers yeah are they of course they're a bet god for that oh big news is it the dacia sandero no um it's the european car of the year 2008 is the replacement for the vauxhall vectra ladies and gentlemen the vauxhall insignia it's you had to look that up there didn't you well the weird thing is that three of us were being driven around in one of these last week and be honest we didn't actually notice what it was seriously i was in that with back and forth to a show we were doing for three days and i thought it was a renault i can remember one thing about it it had very hard seats yes it did ah actually you can't criticize those because a german panel of sea text birds have different what a german there's a german there's a german panel of seed experts and i've invited them all to your house for christmas oh god where would you put them how does it sit near a stand up well they have voted to give it their their coveted accolade for for the quality of the seeds they've praised the quality oh that's rubbish it's like those people that say you've got to eat natural yoghurt because it's good for you it's like and those you get this people go i like a hard bed it's good for your spine it doesn't i hate heart i do like a hard bed actually no i'm sorry richard can anyone think of one thing in the world which is better hard than soft well that's that's quite awkward actually there jeremy what ice he got us out of it yeah well thanks for getting us out of that one mate right now can we move on please yeah absolutely fabulous and now the news and it's great news ladies and gentlemen it's news to warm the hearts of nations jeremy clarkson has lost his voice oh man i'm sorry i know imagine how we feel oh they're gutted mate they're gutted but the good news is that means we can talk about whatever we like and see what we like so no let's let's yeah yeah whatever so let's get on with the news and i thought we'd start this week with talking about um this magazine called heat every year they do a survey in which they ask the whole world to tell them their sort of weirdest crush their strangest freakiest oddest most embarrassing ridiculous person to fantasy and uh well do you want to guess you who's he's won it ladies and gentlemen yeah number one weird weird quest and the other thing ladies and gentlemen in the same magazine this is this is actually quite poetic in the romance because he's in the same magazine as his [Music] boyfriend and he loves him so much sir jeremy you must be i'm really pleased that you should share magazine space with will young your boyfriend you know what you did the other day when he still had his voice he came into the office and have you heard will's new single it's fantastic yeah he loves it he will he went on about it all the time i love bill's new song he does i just say oh it speaks or also the squeaks is it no no oh that's just a noise that you're deflating what's that synthetic saliva do you need what it means but i have just a few minutes of speaking oh so you like you need more saliva well ladies and gentlemen i've no doubt we can oblige with that how do you know it's synthetic and it isn't just sunblocks you shut up for a kick off as well what what is that noise you're making seen his eye he's got the biggest eye infection i've ever seen at least i don't look like a mutant has it come to this i'm working with these two this isn't a television program anymore it's a colony i tell you what instead of holding abuse at each other why oh excuse me why don't we do the new yes do the news good news okay we haven't been asked to do the commentary on the formula one coverage on the bbc next year yeah it's a relationship no it's good news especially what they've got they brought martin brundle over from itv that's fantastic we'll be able to watch the slow march of his trousers up his stomach they've got um eddie jordan he's going to be a pundit that's fantastic he's a great guy david coulthard though is the other pundit and that worries me because i think that means that on lap two of every race you tell you'll suddenly go off or it'll just fall off the stand for no reason why you've done that apparently they've got they've got murray walker involved they have murray walkers coming back to the baby he is yeah bless him which is good did you know though he's 84. i know he'll be going to silverstone going we're all trees here with our lad ferrari's pulled in for their first pit stop let's go over to murray walker murray can someone change me back it's fun again it's impressive but at 84 to be commentating on f1 that's pretty cool you haven't been commentating on anything look i've just thought okay i want to move it on you know the duchess of york okay sarah ferguson she recently sold her jaguar which has ended up in the hands of um well papers this week uh the hands of a cabbie uh steve coulson 31 of the north somewhere he's gone to the papers because he found that she's left all the addresses she's been to in the sat nav still programmed into the system he's saying okay what if i'd been a terrorist this car is a suicide bomber's dream now one of the addresses in there is windsor castle well another palace i think some people know where those things are no don't laugh this is a national security nightmare and also he has inadvertently made himself the world's most hunted man because i'm presuming he's looked at this sound man yeah he's seen the address he's he knows where wins the castle well every terrorist every terrorist organization in the world is going to be after him for his lethal secret knowledge i think there's only one decent course of action here behave with honor well assuming he has destroyed it now that's fine he has read it therefore he must kill himself and take his knowledge to the grave now it's a new mini convertible it's got better engines bigger boots but the thing caught my eye is it's fitted with something called an openometer i'm not making this up an openometer which tells you how much you've driven it with the roof off well what's the point in that you might have a dial that tells you how many times you've driven it through leicester why is it important to know how many miles you drove with the roof up and how many you drove with the roof down that's no sense but um do you remember chevrolet on the early corvettes they had a little dial that showed you how many revs the engine had done revs yeah well going around at 5000 rpm it would have to be wider than the car just to get the dialogue i worked it out for my old porsche actually it was what my old porsche was 25 years old i worked out that it had done uh 8.4 times 10 to the 8 reps you spent time wow so you must actually have done everything there is to do in the whole world to get to the bottom of the list of everything a human being can do what's it like on the top of everest is it good it's all right richard i went to a dinner party the other day and i sat next to a girl who said she couldn't believe that james may was still single here's your answer here's your answer anyway look tough times for car makers as we know they're all in really really deep oh dear i've arrived to the point where i can't say that you really have to do this mess yes um okay now they've resorted they've resorted to offering incredibly long test drives to people just to get them into the showroom okay lexus will lend you a car for 48 hours two days bmw so you can go in one of their cars for 100 miles peugeot 24 hours peugeot persian are they surprised when people bring it back after 24 minutes that's enough of that now the reporter who uncovered this story he says he went to a peugeot dealership to try a 207 and the uh the salesman said well i can go one better than that sir i can lend you a 4007. that's not one better is it that's three thousand eight hundred better away just to try and get a sale one better than a 207 is work it out it's um it's herpes think about this logically how many people here drove down to the studio today everybody is a brilliant car best in the world what's a brilliant car the peugeot 406 for the sixth player that's utah i think he thinks that the peugeot 406 with a six player cd is is the best car in the world not an enzo as it turns out we've been wasting our time and i'm glad you brought that up because i'm going to skip on down if i may please the number of lunatics in britain has been half i know there's some evidence to suggest that they're out and in their countryside and among us but i have arrived at this conclusion with a simple and alarming fact that came across my desk only this morning electric car sales are down by half which must mean that loonies are fewer between really

Channel: Caleb M

Views: 2,783,042

Rating: 4.8225389 out of 5

Keywords: top gear, top gear season 12, Jeremy clarksin, Richard hammond, James may, the grand tour, conversation street, top gear news, top gear uk, best of top gear news, laughs, best moments, season 12

Id: p6d16LbQLIA

Length: 29min 57sec (1797 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 21 2020