(rock music) - Fuck me. - Roller derby. - [Keith] What's better than a whole gang of girls skating down
and knocking you over? - I love rollerskating
because it's basically having cars on your feet. - We're going into a ring
with a bunch of buff women who are going to beat the shit out of us. This is a terrible idea. (upbeat music) What do I know about roller derby? - [Keith] It's a sport where
tough ladies push each other for an hour while skating? - You put wheels on your feet. - Get someone in the shoulder, they fall you stand up, it
feels good man, feels good. (shouts) - This seems like it was imagined in a 1980's science fiction novel. - It sounds like a
sport I'd love to watch. But today we're doing
it and we're doing it with the Derby Dolls, the
most famous group of girls who push over other girls. - Roller derby is a full contact sport. And it involves two teams on the track. You field two jammers, one from each team, every opposing blockers
hips that she passes is a point. - So skate and turn left and don't fall. - You can fall but just get up right away. (laughs) - The Derby Dolls, are
the Derby Dolls a team? Are the Derby Dolls the
league, how does it work? - We are a women's bank track
league based in Los Angeles. We have four home teams,
Fight Crew, Sirens, Tough Cookies and my
team Varsity Brawlers, which is the best team ever. So we are gonna teach
you first to fall small, some basic stops. - How to skate the
track, how to hit people. That's the fun part of derby. - I've probably played
the most contact sports out of the Try Guys but
this is the first time I've played against only women. - I have the structural
integrity of uncooked pasta. My body is jut waiting to
crumble and blow off into wind. - [Jager] Injuries are kind
of common in roller derby it is a full contact sport. - I actually enjoy getting beaten up. Like I really like physical pain. - I'm getting married so I'm
very concerned about all of me. My fiance told me not to do this video. Not because she cares about my face, because she cares about that wedding. - Professor Jager, I've
never skated before is this a good place to start? - Well I've a better idea for you guys. (soft music) - Got any tips? Don't fall, great. ♫ Sometimes the world seems cruel ♫ Nothing ever goes your way ♫ Every - Woop! - You're okay, you're okay. ♫ Sometimes - Teamwork, teamwork. Teamwork! ♫ Oh ♫ Time is on your side ♫ Oh - And we're supposed to
like bump people like this? Ugh. - So after an hour of
learning how to skate, now is the time to go to a
ramp where the Derby Dolls are gonna kick the shit
out of me and my friends. Let's do, ah! (laughs) - [Jager] So everyone's basically
doing the exact same thing to get around the track. - Come to momma bird. - You're slightly athletic I've been told. Good luck little buddy. He's alive. - [Keith] Good job! (boos) - So in two days, we're
gonna go from beginner to no skating experience, to
playing a roller derby match. How fucked are we? - 10.5? - That's pretty good,
I'm mean, or is 10 bad? - 10 is normally good. - We're like super fucked. - Point five more fucked. - Fell off the scale. - Like fucked up. - Were point five more
fucked than most count. - For stability reasons we have a stance called derby stance which means
you're basically in a squat the whole time, there's two
different kinds of falling so it's your knees and then you will eventually fall backwards
because that's just what happens. So you're gonna go, one, two. And that's it. (shouts) You just want to be sure that
you don't put your hands down because your wrists have
a tendency to break. I like to always, whenever
I train, hold a box of kittens, if you drop
the box of kittens, you run them over and
they're dead and you're sad. (meows) (shouts) - [Keith] The kitties safe. - Yes. (laughs) You definitely did. After falling a thousand
times your body will learn how to do it safely. - Fuck me that one hurt so much. - The more time you spend on the floor, the more you are a hazard to
yourself but mostly others. - Hazard to myself and
others is like my bi-line. (laughs) - Were gonna fix that. The roller derby community,
we're super diverse and we're really tightly knit,
like I would never have met any of these people because
I'm actually really nervous and like socially anxious but roller derby, you all
bond over like sweating and falling. It is something for women
that women didn't think that they could do because
it's something so physical and it is really violent,
a lot of what we get when we first start is
I'm sorry, I can't do it, I'm not strong enough
and those are all lies. You guys are gonna fall on your ass a lot. But we're just gonna try and
get you to have muscle memory to do it safely. So it's called the slide
out, you're skating, you're skating, you're like 'oh shit I'm gonna fall backwards', right? You want to pick a cheek, both feet out and off to the side. It's gonna hurt just deal with it. - What? - Choose a side. Well I mean being tall
does have it's advantages for those great. Both feet out. (laughs) okay, that looked
straight down the middle, - [Zach] Did that hurt? - Sure did hurt Zach. But thank you for the compliment. - Oh can you swear at each other? - The official ruling is,
you can swear in general but you cannot swear at
a specific skater, ref or coach. - So I can scream, 'oh shit on my dick' - Yes. - But I can't say, 'shit on your dick'. - Yeah, just a general anyone's dick. We always say, high on the straightaway, low on the turns, that
just maximizes your speed and it gives you more bang for your buck, so you don't have to exert
that much energy to go fast. So you go low on the turn. You shoot up on the straight
away, so as high as you can, shoot down, back up, and shoot down as close as you can, and that's how you skate the track. - Wow! - High on the straight away. - Jager what if going fast is scary and I don't want to do it? - Get over it. - Great. (laughs) (shouts) - Keep your hands up. And then keep your fingers,
feet and then just stay there until you, yup. - Roller derby y'all. - What if you find that fear always wins? - [Jager] That's why you have pads. Try again. - Try again. - [Jager] Try again, just keep trying. Just keep your knees bent, getting a little better. - Remember, we're the Try Guys, not the do it the first
time guys, let's go. (cheers and encouragements) - [Jager] Hold your kittens. Bend your knees. (upbeat music) - It's hard to not feel
really shitty right now, like I can't stop, I
can't play this sport, 'cause I don't know what I'm doing here. (whistle blows) - [Jager] Go ahead and grab water. - This is super exhausting, but, per my fiance's request,
did not break my face, did not break my wrists, I
can still walk down the aisle. - I was kind of excited to hit people but know I'm a little worried about it like it's hard enough just skating. - What we learned today was
basically the equivalent of running across the football field without actually doing anything. I don't know what's going
to happen when we actually put it in the strategy,
the blocking, the hitting and the actual game. - I hope that when we
have Jager, we don't bomb. Tough coach. - Now that we're totally dope at this, how do you actually play the game? - Gather around. There are 10 people on the track, there are five from each team. - We only have four, do you
think you could still win, even on a team with us? - No but I'll do it. - Yes, that's the spirit. - [Jager] So you have four blockers, and then each team fields a jammer. She's the one who collects the points. So what you do on the whistle,
everybody starts moving the jammers go forward and
they try to go through the pack which is the largest
group of opposing blockers from each side, first
one to get out legally, is the lead jammer, the second pass is her first scoring pass,
and that means every opposing blocker's hips that she
passes with her hips is a point. - And you can't score points
til you've gone around once. - Yes. - And how long does a round usually last? - 60 seconds or less. - How many do you have? - As many as you can fit within an hour. - How do you hit people? - With your hips and your shoulder. - So no elbows to the face? - No. - Does it feel good to
knock over a jammer though? - Yes. Your face. (laughs) (imitates gun shot) (rock music) - Your center of gravity is here. When somebody hits you, the
lower and the more grounded you are the better, but the sweet spot to hit is right here. - Oh. - That's not fair, the sweet
spot is so accessible on me. - Yes it is. So I would go punk, and I would hit him. But I'd pop him up. I'd pop him up. - Do I like really knock
over one of these dudes? - Yeah, knock over Eugene. - Eugene you want to get knocked over? (classical music) Alright Eugene's good. Eugene's good. You ready? (shouts)
(laughs) (laughs) - Booty bump. Work that butt. Show him yeah. (laughs) yeah. Was that a foul? - [Chata] Yes. I think you guys should
work on walling up. - What did you say, walling up? - Yes, so it's like a wall of four people. So you get together, chest
up, eyes up, butt down. Ready, roll out, the person
on the high, which this case is Eugene, is gonna go faster, person on the low slows it down. In the straight aways it's the opposite, Eugene slows down, and Zach picks it up. That is not a wall, you lost a man. If Keith is behind you
guys gotta slow it down to catch up with Keith. - Wall link up, Try Guys assemble. - You're almost there. Stay with your wall. I'm gonna find a hole. (boys shouting) - No. - [Chata] Sorry. - Yo Jager I feel like we
got this, let's kick some ass and take some names. (tough music) ♫ You can be my champion - We are given roller derby names. It's basically an alter
ego, that everyone chooses once they start skating. - So I'm a Habersbasher,
what do you think? - Okay, I'll take it. - She loves it, she loves it,
she loves it, she loves it. - So the importance of
bout makeup, it's a way to pump yourself up,
some people like to have the same thing over and over, kind of like a lucky rabbit's foot, or you wear the same underwear. - Gross. Will you help us put our
bout makeup on today? - Sure. - In honor of you being our coach, I would love something horizontal, but I want it just
straight across my eyeball, all the way here and all the
way here so it's just almost like a smoky eye but so
smoky it's like volcanic. - I'm called Nasty Ned,
because I got a good booty and I'm a perfect 10. Look back, mailed it. What do you think? It's printed on the shirt
so we can't change it. - So I'm hoping this look will scare my opponents from
ever wanting to even hurt me. - I think you don't
need glasses for people to pity you. (laughs) - So my last name's Yang,
which rhymes with a lot of fun words and I decided
to go for Yang Bang which describes what
I'm going to do today, I'm gonna bang people. - So I was thinking like
a fancy man mustache. 'Cause I'm a fancy nasty man. Or maybe like angry eyebrows. - My last name is Kornfeld. - Okay. - So I went with like you
know, there's creamed corn. So I'm gonna cream my competition. - So how do you think I'm gonna do, you've watched me progress. - You're gonna be there. And you're gonna do things. - Okay. - It goes, it should go like. - They're like two separated,
I know what I'm doing. Okay. - Okay, okay, okay, - Wait oh that, I mean, (laughs) - Up, not down! - [Jager] It was. - How do I look? - [Jager] You look so good. - If you saw me coming down the track would you feel bad hurting me? - Yes. - Good. - Oh Jager, you're
really good at derby but I don't know if you
have a career in makeup. (laughs) - It does look like I got run
over by a tire on my face. - Yeah this is awful, thank you. - Nasty Ned, ready for your close- oh no. What, what, what happened to my mustache? I don't, I love it. (laughs) - I look like Daryl
Hannah in Blade Runner. - I look like one of the little rascals. - It's nasty. (laughs) (slurps) - Thanks a lot, thanks for teaching us and I'm so sorry for the
performance you're about to see. (bell dings)
(dramatic music) - Try Guys on three. - Yeah. - One, two, three. - [All] Try Guys. (whistle blows) - [Announcer] 30 seconds to the track. (chatter) (whistle blows) Jam one. Black lane. - [Jager] Pop back up,
pop back up, boy pop, gotta get here. Walls up, blue wall up. Wall up. - [Keith] Wall up, wall up. Wall, wall it up, wall up. (guys shout) (whistle blows) - [Guy] That's so fun. - Fun, fun! What part of that is fun? - [Eugene] So should we
have Zach be jammer now? - Let's do Zach. - So which one am I? - You're jammer. - [Keith] You're the jammer now. - I'm the go fast guy? - You're the go fast in
the back of the line. (whistle blows) (chatter) (whistle blows) - [Announcer] Jam two. - [Jager] Pop up pop up, don't apologize. Get up there get up the track. You got it, pop back up, pop back up. You need to be on the track. Pop back up Kremer get back on the track. - [Zach] Ow. - [Jager] Nice Kremer, go go go. Kremer down the track! (whistle blows) - [Announcer] Black Jammer first. - Did I score a penalty? - She cut, which means like
you know cutting in line, she just went ahead of you. - How did I do? - So good. - I fell a lot. - The next jam is a
power jam which means we are the only ones with a jammer, and we're the only ones able to score. - [Keith] Shit, - Who wants to jam? - Don't waste it on me. Power play give it to Eugene. Give it to Eugene. And we're gonna try to not fuck it all up. (whistle) - [Announcer] 30 seconds. (whistle blows) Jam three. - [Jager] Nice slide Eugene, go go go. Nice. Go again, go again, go again. - [Keith] Going back baby. (beeps) - [Jager] Again Eugene. One more pass. Get back up. (whistle blows) - What's up! That's our Eugene. Yeah! Woo. Roller derby baby. Jammer baby. - These things are happening. - I'm really getting hurt out there. I took some bad spills. - [Ned] Go for it Keith,
before you get more injured. - Yeah give me last run. - Before you get more, if you need to, you can take
it off and pass it to me. (rewinds) You're already confused
but I might as well say it, so say, Eugene is a pivot right, put it on your helmet but
say like I'm a jammer, I can't get out because you
guys are so good at blocking. I can actually take off the
panty, hand it to Eugene, take it, and now he becomes
the jammer put it on top of the helmet, double panties. - Oh wow so I can, - And now you are the - Wall into a jammer? - Yes, he is just a jammer. - Don't throw it. - Do a panty pass. - That's what we're gonna do. - Everyone jam take it off,
but you have to make it to me though because I can't go back. - I get it, I got you hard. (whistle blows) (whistle blows) - [Announcer] Jam four. - [Jager] Yes Keith, yes, you got this. Catch up you guys catch up. Catch up. Make a wall blue, make a wall. Nice. - Go somewhere else, go somewhere else. Go somewhere else. (whistle blows) - [Announcer] Blue one zero, low block. - Come on. - [Keith] Penalty! Ned! (whistle blows) - [Jager] Do not take your
helmet off and skate around. (shouts) - Are you serious right now ref? - Yeah I'm sorry. - Are you serious? I went low. I was falling, I was
hurt, that was all her. She's pushing me, (groans) - I'll jam. - Alright. - Cool. (whistle blows) (whistle blows)
(dramatic music) - [Announcer] Jam five. Black leg. - I can't do anything. (whistle blows) - [Jager] Last one 'cause it got. - Redemption baby, I'm ready
to come out of that penalty box what do I do? Really really fast, okay. - [Announcer] Okay this is our last bout, we believe in you baby let's do this. - Let's go, one two three. - [All] Try Guys. (whistle blows) - [Jager] Don't disappoint me. Ned go. - [Man] Go Ned. (shouts) Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Catch her nasty catch her. (pulsing heart beats) High on the straightaway,
low on the turns. Stay with your wall. - [Ned] Gotta good booty
and I'm a perfect 10. - [Zach] Structural
integrity of uncooked pasta. (whistle blows) - [Jager] That was excellent. Yes, fuck yeah. (shouts and cheers) (upbeat music) - Wow what a rush. - You know how hard it is to be on wheels on a really sharp incline and go slow? - You think that's a
traditionally male thing so like put yourself in harms way, nope, women can do that just as well. - They fell just as much
as I thought they would. - Jager! - Falling is actually kind of fun. (cheers) - I'm very surprised that no one died, there was a panty pass,
which was really exciting. Ned got out. - That was sad, not good team work. - So if these four guys
can learn how to skate within the last couple of days, go straight into a scrimmage with the Los Angeles Derby Dolls, anyone who sees this
video can come look us up, find the warrior within themselves and figure out who you
are through skating. - So many of us fall on our butts and pretend like it never happened but derby, roller derby,
teaches you how to do it and get back up, and that's
a life lesson we can all take with us, male or female. (cheers)
I kind of hate that it's always banked track derby in these types of things.
Freakin love the try guys! I was so excited when I saw they uploaded this. Lol
And now I've got a massive derby crush for Jager Bomb. She was amazing!!
Cholos try did this too... I met them at my friend's bout. They were super amazing and really nice to everyone. The (female) youtube stars said they were jealous of all the players asses and kept asking to grab them.