The TERRIBLE Trolls Movie...

oh sorry was i not supposed to do that i mean it was right [Music] picture back to the year 2016 where we're on the cusp of some really weird kids films a couple years back we had the iconic lego movie inspiring duplicates for years to come and it's not too long until we are to be inundated with all sorts of brands similarly running and gunning for that big hit again in some dark future the emoji movie is said to be coming out but where we are right now on this record date is right on top of one of the earliest clone examples it's the trolls movie based off of those old ugly dolls things that i've only experienced as old relics in my nan's place these guys apparently thought that a film was an ample chance to rebrand their design and mass produce more much money i didn't really watch this film when it came out surprise surprise and i've only really seen glimpses of it from trader clips like of a cloud with a million hand movements doing something or other from first impressions this looks to be yet another generic kids bait film with a presumably shallow set of characters a pretty basic plot and no real depth in themes i wouldn't be surprised if it was artificially stuffed full of pop songs just to keep up with their insultingly low expectations of kids attention spans and bonus points if it's got an ironically kind of messy message for the kids in the audience that could very well do more harm than good we've gone through these motions a few times before on this terrible movies playlist but let's run it again to finally open pandora's box of the trolls movie because it certainly left a mark oh this is a dreamworks production i figured it was some kind of sony pictures kind of deal huh so the film starts off with a narrative exposition about how trolls are the happiest creatures the world has ever known [Music] did i just walk into a youtube poop anyway we're introduced to the bergen bigger trolls that don't do any of that and live very unhappy lives because of it and they eat trolls to get their happiness starting off right early teaching kids at a very young age the trials and tribulations of a drug addiction right that what i'm supposed to be grabbing from this whatever the case it's time for the trolstis troll eating day with the baby bergen prince waking up the king in the most horrific way daddy second lesson kids try it at home and hope you don't get yeeted across the bedroom in retaliation it's here we're introduced to our obvious villain chef me i don't know her name actually she never really says it in her whole introductory scene still everyone's ecstatic to finally get a dose of happiness and prince gristle is the biggest example having never eaten a troll ever before i mean they do say the first time's the best also while writing this i googled gristle's name to try and make sure i spelt it right not that you'd really see it unless you're reading the captions to see my original scripts that i copy and paste in and this was the first image that popped up when i did god this film is like an early christmas present isn't it anyway big reveal all the trolls are gone replaced with their original design fake outs nice one i think i hear something oh sorry that's just me i mean i've been making a bit of noise while i'm stuck in my little you know hermit cave while this whole pandemic thing's kind of going on you know yeah don't mind me so the trolls are on the run through the tunnels underground and the king says everyone he can seemingly sacrificing himself in the progress in the why did i say progress is process you numpty seemingly sacrificing himself in the process damn what an opening that's a pretty solid theme and motivation for our protagonist to have to fill the shoes of her late father's kingly legacy oh never mind he's he's fine playing that superhero type role instead and he's naked now alright then with the trolls gone the villain is cast out of bergen town i decided to google her name this time and it came back with chef that's it just just chef it could have been like tiramisu or terra misu salmonella chef anyway and when the prince dejectedly asked what will make him happy now the king's response is nothing he will never ever ever ever be happy isn't that just relatable so the trolls rebuild their civilization where the acoustics are best apparently and 20 years pass and princess poppy the little baby that i didn't mention before is all grown up she's like 23 in this movie seriously anyway after more exposition to a bunch of one beat kids they live a life of optimism and cover songs breaking out into move your feet now with shuffled lyrics to apply to what's going on because that's just a way easier way to make a good song and we'll certainly get more attention i don't know if i hate that they took that approach or because i just know that that's actually what would work better either way they're prepping for a super big party and the visuals are just an acid trip of spectacle everyone's happy having some moment in the spotlight glitter guy poops on a portrait and things just keep happening backgrounds are sometimes taken away elaborate dance moves are just executed hours before the party for some reason and hares keep expanding into some kind of cheerleader movement all because they gotta keep the four-year-olds watching somehow i guess this isn't actually the big party why is it happening now enter the most reasonable character in this film branch excuse my accent i know they say branch all the time but i'm not gonna change it branch shoots down all the partying because understandably if i can hear you so can the bergens but they all treat him like some kind of conspiracy theorist instead and when saying he's not coming to the party they're like personally offended by it lesson number three kids uh introverts are terrible people and you should force them into social events oh my god and there's your boomer humor check mark and while it's clear branch isn't in the mood this guru troll now shows up asking for a bit of positivity okay fine i'm positive you all are going to get eaten never heard that one before after some more overstepping boundaries branch eventually leaves and guru guy creek says to tune out negative vibrations they're toxic and some people just don't want to be happy interesting message and that could lead to a genuinely interesting plot point with poppy being surrounded by manipulative people keeping her ignorant and oblivious of the wider world but no that's just the right opinion according to this movie nice one so it's the big party branch disapproves and they actually set off massive explosive fireworks above the village twice am i really supposed to be rooting for these guys but i guess i can check off the dumb watered down diluted plotline for baby children because this is not smart or compelling at all surprise surprise chef shows up and after trolls are just plucked away easily we get another and that superhero king from before has just turned into a dumbass lame chef eventually leaves and poppy deals with the consequences finally the payoff we've all been waiting for and everybody's sad the king wants to up and leave and poppy wants to rescue those lost and the king just won't allow that risk spoilers he totally will later so bobby goes to the only reasonable person in the whole film and visits branch in his bunker explaining what happened it took cooper and smidge and fuzzbert and satin and chenille and i have no idea who these guys are and asks for him to join her on the rescue he rejects shows off his 11-year stock of resources and says he's not crazy he's crazy prepared which honestly sounds like it'd be a good topic for an actual song number for him but performance isn't his thing and the movie doesn't want to write it so oh well and instead of poppy giving some kind of heartfelt apology sitting down with the consequences of her actions realizing the errors of her ways and maturing in a way to try to make up for it she instead acknowledges she's the issue in a very unemotive almost manipulative way gets upset that he still won't join and proceeds to explode through branch's personal space by invading his bunker with every troll in the village to consume his rations in two weeks no emotional heart to heart no serious recognition of her own selfish character and just a super douchey move what a lovely protagonist and now the king will let her go into those impossible lots to save the rest because great nice you've made it to page three of our script for the video so good on you uh if you haven't already then you know do subscribe only you can help balance out my skewed unsub rage account and actually it has been improving over the month so thank you very much for that on the streaming front we are doing the october trailer showcase we're watching all sorts of october trailers that haven't been covered on the channel we can discuss it live maybe analyze frame by frame either way it's a way to make all this extra content on these tiny little things that didn't really make the mark beforehand or maybe i just didn't know it existed give me suggestions of trailers if you want it's all going on around about now you know twitter though poppy still goes alone bursting into an actual original song believe the only home i've ever known brave the dangers of the forest yeah you can tell also among this second spectacle i guess now's a good time to talk about the strange pseudo-superpower that these characters have with their hair being able to stretch it limitless amounts curling it into camouflages and hardening it into staircases it's a little weird how it's never really addressed and boy does it give these characters a lot more mobility was that the roblox oof sound effect so in this one song number the concept of adventure is just thrust balls to the wolves here i guess everything you could possibly imagine on transit happens there's geyser land being eaten into a bird baby splatter land desert and ice hurricanes and eyeball planets surviving stomach acids turning into allergic ball to continue forwards this again is just random stuff happening for the kids that are just not paying attention though i do quite like the aesthetic of this world being all made out of fabric materials gives that woolly world paper mario kind of vibe anyway branch randomly shows up and whips the latest spider thread away apparently all being part of the plan okay and branch actually has a formulated plan as opposed to poppy who literally just has rescue everybody as the plan i mean come on and to add more onto the obnoxious and annoying character traits when going to sleep for the night branch obviously wants some silence so she plays the sound of silence at it i get that it's a joke but it's still a douche move again lesson four kids sleep is for the weak you won't believe how actual legit that will become as a rule later on in your life good for you branch so they make it back to the secret tunnels but not before a new character appearance cloud again they don't really say his name apparently it's cloud guy excuse me demanding a high five for information little slappy make daddy happy stop and when finally doing it cloud proceeds to berate and make fun of branch because annoying is everybody's middle name apparently and one understandable chase scene later and they've now reached their destination cloud is done with his entire character's purpose and so he's just gone and i googled him more and it turns out he voiced rumpelstiltskin in shrek forever after discovering that was more interesting than his entire run time on the film so the two have made it to the troll tree in the center of bergen town where everybody is miserable and singing about it when i thought bergen's never sang meanwhile our little prince gristle has now grown into king they kind of gloss over the king's death don't they anyway chef now returns with a troll proposal to the king gristle bringing back trolstis gristle accepts the trolls occasion and chef reveals her true plan and all of bergentown will get exactly what they deserve true happiness that actually sounds like a good guy thing to do could you imagine if this actually had the moral conflict of the perspectives of happiness like how she's actually trying to make her species happy oh well she just wants to claim the throne somehow so poppy and branch try to find the trolls use some led rapunzel hair like powers and they find the king about to eat creak the guru guy they fake out the bite a few times skim over the fact that his father is dead again and eventually gristle consumes and the others are taken away though poppy is still optimistic that creek's alive since they didn't see him swallow or chew and i guess it's too scary for the kids in the audience i don't know and adamant on that fact poppy then dives into action to the others in the cage not greek or gristle or anything all right so everyone's taken down to the basement thanks to chef scullery made bridget clearly the friendly bergen of the bunch and with her unfortunate lowly life she cries herself to sleep in bed when nobody's watching and then just randomly starts singing in a completely different tone of voice about her love for gristle whatever happened to bergens don't sing seriously also it's a cover of adele's hello taking the easy approach again you know anyway with her now asleep apparently in like the middle of the day they revealed the cage trolls who in their minus two iq moment break out into celebrate good times in the moment because they just have no situational awareness and they really are riding on that annoying trope and after arguing about creek again british spots them all everyone panics you know how this goes and the conflict is solved by poppy exposing her love for the king though how she knew her name was bridget it's something you're not really supposed to think about you love crystal too you better back off girlfriend lame so anyway bobby makes a deal with bridget that the trolls will help her get a date with the king if she helps give access to creek even though literally the entire rest of the team agree that he's dead said surely they'll just let it go at this point whatever so there's a whole musical makeover number that's interrupted james corden is the big guy who shows up in all of these kind of movies and doesn't have a single good line in the whole movie just have a good cry go girl but all you really need to take out of this whole thing is that why won't you sing because sing and kill my grandma okay it's a it's a tragic backstory thing which the others also then proceed to serenade him for which seems a little distasteful to me and then they just go on with the plan becoming a rainbow wig for bridget while singing i'm coming out interesting coincidence there rainbows and coming out but that's not what they're going for and bridget starts this and the king is head over heels for her because it's all down to looks kids lesson learned and when debating what to instruct bridget to do next we get don't you know anything about sarcasm i think i had a sarcasm once [Music] oh god so the trolls then whisper in her ear all the things to say on their impromptu pizza date and it ends with branch actually being the romantic one of the bunch and leaning a bit of it onto poppy even though it's not really deserved at all i can get that they would end up together but i don't know having any sense of chemistry kind of would have helped oh hey creek is alive how fortunate so they move on to the ice rink with more uncomfortable innuendos another pop song and some visuals to keep the kids looking and then we move on leaving behind a roller skate because the cinderella trope wasn't ham-fisted enough and they couldn't come up with their own original story they couldn't already do the songs let's just rip off a fairy tale while we're at it too and they all rejoice on a mission success though now the new conflict can begin bridgette wants help for the big dinner that she's now been invited to whilst the trolls have other plans so she has a tantrum about how she now wishes that she'd never gone on the date because that's a natural response the writers came up with and the trolls have to abandon her going to the king's amulet in his room to grab creek which realistically they never really needed bridget for at all apart from the knowledge that they randomly luckily got i guess if they were always able to just go to his room without her then why was this whole thing done and the scene plays out like that headphone gag you've seen done better before also this pet croc really didn't get that much establishment in this film did he was just in the background most of the time and then suddenly he wasn't after a thrilling chase scene they open up the amulet to see it's missing and the chef just magically captures them again just right time right place gotta keep that plot going and it's revealed in a pretty admittedly fun moment that creek is selling out the village to save himself though wouldn't it be interesting if he hammed up more the guilt of that actual deal and actually struggling with the idea that he's not a good guy but no he he doesn't really seem to care that much i do like though the double strangling joke when it's revealed like that's what so it's trolstis again prepping for the big dinner where every troll in existence bar creek is dropped into a cooking pot i'll be honest looking at all of this i can't not think of another event where people were trapped inside an oven-like contraption waiting to die dark but i mean it's hard to not poppy has her sad monologue and colour fades from her body and everyone else follows the bergen are also sad as is their character trait but the king is lonely being stood up and bridget doesn't have a disguise anymore and how do you resolve from this cold toy story furnace type ending well you just look at the cast list branch is just in timberlake i wonder if he's ever gonna sing in this movie though actually he doesn't really succeed until long into the song when their clocks actually light up for hug time as i haven't established throughout this entire video out of sync for the first time in this movie even though they're supposed to be like a synchronized watch gimmick uh whatever [Music] yeah so i'm gonna need a little bit more time you guys i i do apologize i know i'm kind of ruining the moment of color and optimism but you know in my timeline it's still kind of 20 20 so you know everyone's still kind of keeping on the pessimism vibe we still kind of haven't got our saturation back and i haven't i haven't even stuck my hair up to look like you guys with the the troll design or anything else but you know just need a little bit more time with everyone's hopes raised a little bit the llama thing plays a harmonica everybody hugs and though they're not giving up it's bridget who saves them all anyway but sure she lets them escape poppy doesn't want to abandon her again and it's settled the bergen are eager for dinner the king except he's been stood up and the trolls are escaping through the tunnels just like before though poppy still wants to return the favour to bridgette the pot is open to reveal their gone and bridget is accused of eating them all only for the trolls to have somehow teleported back to the castle from all the way where they were before under the tunnels like five seconds beforehand they dive onto bridget's head and revealed that they were the wig and decide to talk to the king instead explaining that those two were happy anyway with their peta date and that happiness was inside them all along and the bergens all just accept that idea what's the way to bring them all happiness without eating a troll well of course it's to burst out into another cover pop song oh sorry was i not supposed to do that i mean it was right there i'm really surprised none of these bergen who have had a troll before and waited for years at this point didn't jump at the temptation and apparently dancing was the next thing that lines directly into making the bergen happy something they never discovered themselves and somehow turns the whole town into happy rainbows too you know they say that when you die your brain flushes you with all sorts of endorphins and chemicals to make you feel good in the moment to relieve you to dissolve in that moment of death i don't want to add to all the many they're dead theories but you know and in that very same dancy kind of sequence they return to the village poppy is crowned queen despite the king still very much being alive and poppy and branch become a couple apart what even was your purpose and that's the end of the film just the quickest abrupt ending they could really jump into in those last moments huh hey remember when branch said he sure hopes that singing and dancing and hugging was the answer to their problems i don't think it was supposed to be the legitimate foreshadowing writers oh man they dragged john cleese into this and you know what surprised me more about exploring this whole movie it turns out it's not actually all that badly reviewed both on all sorts of critical websites as well as on youtube itself judging solely on the trailers i saw this seemed like just another 1b shallow kids movie but after watching it yeah okay i have a lot of problems with it but overall it was just kind of okay honestly a lot of the problems i do have with this film can somewhat be talked down to it being a pretty simplistic kids film and others are a bit of a stretch to come to sure i could go on about how the burgoon could somewhat represent the dull grind of depression that's likely to hit the kids of this generation considering the way our world's going but it's not necessarily appropriate and yes the message of just be happy isn't really the greatest to tell kids but i guess it's aiming for the demographic younger than inside out's more nuanced kid audience that can barely compute the depth of what's happening on screen right this film is aiming for the super young who are already probably in a natural happy state so it's just enriching that emotion more as for all the other lessons learned chest hair and sleep is just about being entertaining on screen being introverted isn't really a commentary they're thinking of and being good looking is just the norm expected thing i guess when they try to make a point about it it comes off even worse you know the actual plot line in this film while incredibly stupid in some places is alright i followed along fine enough and though the visuals are mostly just spectacle i can see how it's fun to watch especially for the younger viewers heck even that first joke of the high-pitched speedy opening picks away at my nostalgia for the ancient fred videos here on youtube so kids would definitely be into it james corden of course is in every iteration of something like this though why he's holding a worm baby the whole time i'll never understand and though the film could be talking about drugs or veganism superpowers and genuine range of emotions really it's just not what the film was aiming for it's simplistic playing the corporate game of taking the irrelevant popular thing to guarantee success and at the end of the day i think it's fairly light-hearted sure it's trying to sell products in a franchise and it's not really got a deep theme but it hasn't got a dreadful black-hearted message unless you're hunting for it it's a pretty charming watch and some of the jokes do actually land whether they meant to or not the boomer parents certainly have plenty to be entertained by and i mean the freaking face this guy makes tickles me even if it is i mean i guess it is a joke literally built for me the adult in the room but like man maybe it's just the meme of it i don't know man it actually entertained me have i lost my terrible badge what's going on is that a good thing i don't know i came into this expecting yet another terrible bland film to add to the collection and though it's not that extravagantly tasty or even close to smart i guess i'd sit a kid through this voluntarily and maybe be like the last thing on my list it's not pixar and it's certainly not a good musical but it does a simple enough job and clearly it's worked out for them and i guess that's not really their fault it's just how the industry works and how the audience responds to it let's see if the sequel tarnished what little legacy this left behind one day for now my name's been daz you didn't really care and i'll see you in a bit so yeah there's an update on the green screen format for you now we've got mobile gags with a little bit of improv i don't know why i never really thought of that beforehand but there will probably be more of it now going forward so yeah i hope you enjoyed it also played around with the lens a little bit to get a bit more dynamic depth differences between different gags and whatever the res you don't need to hear about voice but whatever either way uh stream wise do check it out if you want to see that trailer coverage that will probably be going live soon when this video comes out otherwise i hope you enjoyed and let's uh see you in about half a week now we're doing twice a week you know this but yeah see you in a half week you know i still don't know the name of those side characters who's smudge none of them have a smudged you know

Channel: DazzReviews

Views: 2,056,702

Keywords: dazzreviews, trolls, trolls movie, the trolls movie, the terrible trolls movie, terrible movies, dreamworks, analysis, video essay, review, discussion, kids film

Id: 0fXC1v0yY14

Length: 23min 39sec (1419 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 13 2020