"The Sermon on the Mount - Part 6: Divorce and Remarriage" Pastor John K. Jenkins Sr.

so grateful for you joining us tonight praise the lord thank you god bless you for being with us tonight and i saw people checking in from all over i saw people from miami and dayton ohio and i saw people from ireland even checking in and i'm so grateful that uh all of you who put us on your calendar and say you know what i gotta be in the word tonight tuesday night at 7 p.m east coast time thank the lord found members here and our friends here and the dmv and for all of you who come to join us tonight tonight is uh what we do we we're doing a series on uh the sermon on the mount and jesus preached on he touched on so many areas and tonight we're going to talk about one of the most one of the most controversial topics there is and a lot of debate a lot of disagreement and i don't expect everybody to agree with me and my perceptions and interpretations of the scriptures but i want to tell all of you tonight as we dive into this i want to tell you two things number one study the scriptures for yourself always study the scriptures for yourself and number two i want to tell you everybody's got to be persuaded in their own hearts and in their own mind and then we had a third thing on there this topic is going to take me more than one week to cover to say all of the pertinent things that i need to say about it so we're going to touch on it tonight and again next sunday next tuesday so it's a two-week lesson so i asked you to try to just hang with us for two nights before you draw any conclusions and i'm going to try to finish early enough because i know there's going to be a lot of questions i know there's going to be a lot of people asking questions so what i want to try to do is finish early enough to give you an opportunity to ask questions uh this evening okay amen let's take a moment and pray father we thank you for the wonderful privilege that you give us to do like brother larry said that we can call on your name thank you for the privilege that you extend to us as your children to cry out to you and to lay our cares and concerns at your feet thank you for loving us enough unconditionally and caring for us enough father to redeem us and wash us and deliver us from our challenges and our shortcomings and our weaknesses and we do not take it lightly that you have afforded us the privilege and in fact the honor almighty god to be your children and to be able to call upon your name so this evening we pray for a special level of grace and a special degree of mercy upon us that you would guide us in our our dialogue and our discussion open our eyes to your truth is my prayer in the mighty name of jesus i pray father that you would let me be your mouthpiece and your instrument for these next few moments allow me to be father uh a conduit to help bring life and direction and answers and hope to somebody's life and i pray this in the mighty name of the lord jesus thank you again for hearing our prayer thank you father for leaning uh leaning into our concerns and speaking to us and i'm praying that if the person's unsaved backslidden unsure or unchurched that you would draw them this night to your kingdom in jesus name we pray amen all right so tonight i want to start off by making several statements again i already gave you a couple and i probably should have waited and gave you all of these right at the outset right now rather than getting your bits and pieces this topic on uh marriage and divorce and remarriage uh is comple it's complex it's it's serious it's a major discussion and topic and there's probably no other subject that i've studied more than this i've said this over the years it's something that i've repeatedly have studied and over time some of my views have shifted and changed and so but some of them have remained the same it is not my goal tonight in discussing this to make anybody feel shamed or guilty i want you to remember that i'm not trying to condemn anybody for what your journey might have been i simply want to explain the scriptures to you as i understand them there are many scholars that have various differences on this issue i'm not a scholar by any means but there are enough books out there you can study for yourself many many segments of the church have disagreed on this subject of divorce and remarriage and under normal circumstances when i've taught this in the past and by the way you can go back and see several of my messages and teachings and series that go back many many years on this topic but i think it's important for me uh to re reverberate to everybody uh as i've i have transitioned and changed and been deeper enlightened and i'm not here to say that that i can't be further enlightened i'm always studying and researching to learn as much as i can but many people have different different churches have split and relationships have been broken i've lost a lot of members on this topic people have left our church because of my belief on this and i i'm okay if you believe differently to me my only request is that you study the scriptures and draw a conclusion not based on how you feel or what you think or what you heard on television i simply want you to draw a conclusion based on your own personal study of the scriptures and don't don't base your your beliefs on on my teachings of it i'm just trying to enlighten you the stuff i've learned and i've researched and found but do your own research about it a lot of people draw their conclusions from a humanistic standpoint that word humanistic means pleasing men to the pleasure of human beings but we are not um we're not to draw our conclusions based on what our human desires are the bible speaks uh very clearly to us about that jot down first quran first corinthians chapter 2 verse 14 it talks about people in our culture and in the community who approach the scriptures with a humanistic mindset of what makes you happy and so god didn't write the scriptures for your happiness and i'll say that often point i also want to say i'm not anti-divorce i am pro-marriage i am very much pro-marriage i am in favor of and supportive of and declaring and preaching and affirming the institution of marriage and i'll i'll fight and preach and declare and pray to keep marriages and families together and i believe that's the heart of god i believe god wants marriages to be together and i believe god will move heaven and earth to save your marriage for those who are in marital problems or have marital challenges i honor the sanctity of the marriage relationships under normal circumstances when i would teach from this passage i would always spend a whole lot of time talking about marriage i'm not gonna do that tonight because it'll be a three or four week series if i did that i'm not going to do that tonight i'm going to instead um just focus in on matthew chapter 5 verse 31 and 32. that is our scripture for tonight matthew chapter 5 verses 31-32 we've already gone through we're in this series on the sermon on the mount for those who may have just joined us uh in this series we're we're doing a study of jesus's sermon on the mount that starts at matthew chapter 5 verse 1. and we we looked at the beatitudes that he covered in verses 1 through 12 we looked at verses 13 through 16 where he talks about how believers are called to impact their communities so we looked at verses 13-16 then we looked at the role of the law in relationship to jesus it's a lot of debate and confusion about the role of the law and whether the law is for us whether it is enforced and so we spent um a lot of time we spent some time looking at verses 17 through 20 and dealing with the role of the law in relationship um to jesus christ we also uh spent time uh dealing with verses 21 through 26 how the lord calls us to deal with how we relate with each other when it's all said and done god is very concerned about how we treat each other how we love each other respect each other honor each other how we treat each other and we looked at verses 21-22 where jesus talked about how we are to relate with each other in that sermon and then we finally last time talked about uh adultery verses 27 through 30. and we highlighted in that passage that jesus is challenging us to know that adultery is not measured solely by solely by your physical interaction with another human being he says if you look on a person with lust in your heart if you look on a person with the desire in your heart you're guilty of of adultery already in your heart and so we spent time looking at that and so tonight we delve into the ever controversial issue of divorce and remarriage bam there it is and i'm gonna look at two verses two verses verses 31 and 32. he talks about divorce and remarriage this this this topic is jesus talks about it and speaks to it all across various scriptures and and i'm going to give you some of those but we're going to try to focus in on these two verses furthermore verse 31 it has been said whoever divorces his wife let him give her a certificate of divorce but i say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery and even though in these passages he's talking about uh he mentions in specifically how you treat your wife it also goes vice versa for the husband too it it goes both ways so i don't want anybody to think that this is only applicable when a to to a wife it also is applicable to a husband as well uh now let's look at verse 31 furthermore it has been said verse 31 jesus is talking whoever divorces his wife let him give her a certificate of divorce and the reason that jesus mentions is he's recalling an old testament passage in deuteronomy verse 24 verse 1 that was given by moses the law of moses deuteronomy 24 1 when a man takes a wife and marries her and happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her and he writes her a certificate of divorce put it in her hand and send her out of his house he's trying to give some very clear specifications for how that partner is treated there was some it was it was been said it has been recorded historically that a man in that day and age could actually just pronounce the words over his wife in in his house and say i divorce you i divorce you i divorce you three times and it was a it was a done deal that is that is in the in the challenge and the problem and the issue with that is often the wife or was left with no status was she married was she not married what i mean what was her status and moses in an effort for some respectability to be issued and dealt with instructed that if you are going to divorce your wife because you found some level of uncleanness in her you had the responsibility of giving her a letter of divorce and this was permitted according to verse one because the wife was unclean and there's a lot of debate on what the word unclean means there's a lot of debate about that again historically unclean could mean she didn't cook the meal right or she didn't make breakfast or she used the wrong word in the dialogue it covered a string of areas of of that but jesus brings clarity about what his posture is about that because in mark chapter 10 verse 5 he says this was allowed because of the hardness of their hearts that's mark chapter 10 verse 5. jesus is speaking to them and saying to them with clarity if you were to read the details of that verse he said this this is saying uh because of the hardness of your heart this was written god god permitted this and allowed you to do this because your hearts were hard but it wasn't so in the beginning this was not the will of god this is not how god wanted a a wife or a spouse to be treated and i think it's important that we understand what the heart of god is about this god has a an ever clear heart about it and jesus mentions this he says listen he let you all do this moses let y'all do that that wasn't in god's original plan and god's original plan that wasn't supposed to be the case that's not how it was supposed to flow but because of how you treated each other and the stiffness of your hearts that you you didn't make the right choice to walk in the right precepts before god and moses allowed you to do it because your hearts were so hard now there's one there's one situation let me give you this verse real quick in deuteronomy chapter 22 verse 28 29 here's one one case you could never divorce you could divorce your wife under any reasons for man a man could never divorce his wife for any reason if he had sexual relations with her prior to the marriage you know a lot of people come to me and want to know is it okay for them to get divorced i get that question all the time and people always expect me based on what they tell me about their messed up jacked up joker person that they married that at one point in history they were the cream of the crop they were the apple in their eye they were so much in love with them but now after whatever has happened and drama and time and ex experiences now they want to get divorced and they come to pastor jenkins hoping i'm going to give you the amen and do the cross and whatever that's called and say it's okay i'm never going to tell you it's okay i'm never going to tell you to do it's okay here's one of the reasons why deuteronomy 22 and 20 verse chapter 22 verse 28 29 really when you get an opportunity here's what it says i'm not going to turn there but i'm just giving it to you as a reference if you violate it brothers you're a woman before she got married you had to go and pay for her back in those days when you married somebody you paid the family you paid the father the bride some money somebody better be glad that ain't the case today you had to pay him some money and you took that girl as your bride if you violated her before you were married had sex with her and then the scripture says you can never divorce her for the rest of your life under any circumstances now y'all come on tell the truth be honest most of y'all have had sex before marriage so you that eliminates divorce being an option for all you jokers hello i wish i i wish i had a crowd full of people to say amen but you know what i hear heaven that's all right the av team and the music is trying to say man y'all too late the truth for the matter is that's a standard if you if you if you engage with that person before you get married divorce cannot be an option for you so when i when i say that to people that that settles it it's over it's a done deal you can't get divorced because 90 90 95 it might even be higher than that of people have engaged in immorality prior to getting married so that's what the scripture says so so moses allowed it in the first place because their hearts were hard and if they had sex or they violated that person before the marital unit they couldn't divorce under any circumstances that's old testament teaching now let's slide over to the new testament here we go to matthew chapter 5 32 here's the very next verse after jesus said verse 31 here's verse 32. his word let's read this this is a significant important passage but i say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery bam there it is right there wow that's a heavy statement y'all that's that's that's that's tough that the world doesn't like this um uh if you'd if if uh divorce and let me listen let me back up but i say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason and then he says accept sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery the question is here is the question what does the word sexual immorality or if you have the king james version it uses the word fornication what does it mean what does that word mean less that that let's divert and talk about what jesus meant in this word it as a matter of fact this little clause let me explain something to you this clause is called the exception clause matthew 5 32 is the exception clause and here's why it's called this it's called the exception clause for several reasons number one it's called the exception clause because it gives an exception to when you can divorce your spouse it's also called the exception clause because in all the other places where divorce is discussed this a clause is not mentioned it's not in any of the other gospels in all the other gospels when this passage of this message of jesus preaching is mentioned the exception clause of except for sexual immorality is not mentioned all the other ones all the other verses in the scriptures that speak to this basically say if you divorce and marry that person you're committing adultery that's all it says it says nothing about the exception clause so the question is what does the word fornication or sexual immorality mean that's mentioned in the exception clause i'm glad you asked the question it is a greek word pornea p-o-r-n-e it's a greek word and what does that word mean it means a lot of things it's a wide scope of sexual activity it could mean fornication it could mean masturbation it could mean it's just wide it's a wide word and i am of the persuasion that everything that that word means cannot possibly be what jesus intended if we interpret it that way it cannot possibly mean that if you masturbate and you have a uh it's grounds for divorce or and it goes wider than that if you uh if you just look on a person with lust in your heart that's what that word also means if you um uh if you use curse words that that that word pornea means that it covers a wide range and i don't i don't believe that jesus was giving us such a wide excuse or reason for us to be able to walk away from the institution of marriage i just don't believe that that's what his uh uh what he means he what did he mean okay i'm glad you asked the question when when when a in the jewish culture first of all the book of matthew was written to the jews anytime you do interpretation of scripture you need to ask who was this letter written to and it's written to the jews matthew was intended for the jewish culture and so there are things in matthew that relate to jewish culture and here's one of them this passage and this discussion and in particular these verses on divorce and remarriage is addressing some of the practices that went on in the jewish culture so uh here's what they did in that day in the jewish culture when uh when uh when a man wanted to marry someone um if somebody wanted to marry somebody the the groom would go and negotiate a a fee that he would pay to the bride's father an agreed upon fee and in some cultures in our country in our world not in our country but i know in south africa this is done in other countries this is still a practice of the day and so uh you agree you would pay that fee and once he paid the fee the engagement period the betrothal period is called it is the period of engagement commences even though the marriage had not been consummated there was an agreement and so he'd pay and they were engaged and then the groom would go off and prepare a home he would go and find a place for him and his bride once they got married to live and however long it took him to get the money or purchase the home or build the home or whatever he was going to do he would go away and prepare the home for his bride when the home was ready he would come back and get the bride and take her home and consummate the marriage and then the marriage becomes official if during that period of him paying the bride's father and him coming back to get her if during that time he discovered she was unfaithful if during that time she had been involved with someone else during that betrothal period prior to consummation if it was discovered that she was not a virgin then he had the right to end the divorce he had the right to sever uh not in the divorce but in the the engagement let me put it that way to end the engagement i hope i'm making uh sense here today at that point he could end the engagement and when that engagement was in it he was free to go get married and he had freed himself from that obligation that was the practice of their day and i believe when jesus speaks and talks to the jewish people about that that's what i believe he's talking about when he says except for sexual immorality i believe he's speaking about that but there's a couple other places that he he he mentions this is i believe it applies to it as well i believe it it it it uh relates to sodomite marriages as well and i gave you a string of verses that talks about sodomite marriage and i know when i first started teaching and preaching this about this 40 years ago um sodomite marriage marriages were not even considered to be anything that was a while something that nobody ever thought would happen but it is now possible that people are now getting married if you want to call same-sex marriages marriages uh but jesus is saying you you may have thought that you've entered into this but but once you uh in this you can you come you come out of that that's not pleasing in his sight don't write me no letters this is what i believe and persuade it you're never going to change my mind about that search the scriptures sodomite marriages and if you if you married somebody and you were male and you thought they was a female and then you discovered later that they were born a male their their birth was they they were born as a male and went through some uh surgery and steps to change and you discover that later i believe it applies to that and that's very possible today that's why i tell people i think it's important for you to get some pictures childhood pictures know some history about the person that you're marrying so you can be sure yeah i mean this is this is this is what i believe is what i'm persuaded by i believe the bible speaks to it secondly i believe it relates to incestuous marriages meaning you married your father your sister within the family that's a prohibited prohibited thing the bible teaches and you discovered later that you you actually married somebody that's a close relative close relative to you the bible prohibits that and i believe you can there's grounds there for you to be able to in that union because it's not acceptable in the sight of god and thirdly um you found unfaithfulness during your engagement period the betrothal period that we just talked about the betrothal period and i want to give you time to for them to lead us up so you can write these verses and again i urge you to go check these verses out these this is not my doing i didn't write the bible these verses were here when i got here and i think it speaks clearly to um to this matter so sodomite marriages that's same-sex marriage is what that means but ultimately incestuous marriages where you married someone a close relative and thirdly a betrothal period unfaithfulness during your engagement period and this again this is to happen uh to sarah prior to the consummation of the of the marriage prior to you actually engaging in sex on number three with the person who you were to be married to so ultimately what i get a thousand questions of about this is why do i think that the exception clause does not mean adultery since fornication one of the areas of of pornea of that greek word one of the things that it means is adultery along with the other hundred other things that it means it's such a wide word with so many definitions to it it means a whole lot well first of all if it meant specifically adultery jesus would have used a different word that would have specifically meant adultery but he didn't use that word he used the the much broader word that i believe applies based on what i just shared with you so i don't believe it means adultery because it is a the word adultery is a different greek word if that's what he meant he would have used a different word secondly i don't believe it means adultery because back in that day adultery was punishable by death if you got caught committing adultery you died that was that was what the law commanded as a matter of fact some of you know the story in john chapter 8 got this verse down john chapter 8 i think it's the first 20 verses or so somewhere in that uh maybe it's one through whatever just read the first many verses of john 8 where a woman was captured and caught in the very act of adultery this woman was caught in the act not heard or no rumor the scripture says they caught her in the very act and they drug her to church i don't know where the man was but they drug her they should have drugged both of them there but they didn't they drug her they drug her the church and they threw it down in front of jesus and said according to the law we caught this woman in adultery and according to the law she should be stoned to death but what should what do you say jesus they were trying to trap jesus they were trying to capture him in a in a trick him they were trying to trick him because if he said stoner to death they would have accused him of being a murderer especially since uh you know um he preaches forgiveness and mercy and all of that they would have said he's he's a murderer he contradicts himself if he had said stoner to death they would accuse him of being a murderer if he if he had said let him go and free her uh and forgive her they would accuse him of breaking the law so they were trying to trick jesus and and and and and [Music] they were trying to trick him uh but he he uh jesus is so smart when they tried to trick him and they kept pushing this woman in front of him this is a church going on jesus preaching the sermon in the middle of his sermon they come down with this woman interrupt the church service throw her down in the front announce to the whole congregation we we caught this woman in adultery in a very act but what does jesus got to say about it and the bible says jesus turned around bent down on the ground and started writing on it on the on the ground it doesn't tell us what he wrote but they kept on pressing him and eventually he stood up and said now you guys are right she should be stoned to death but let's determine who's going to stone her to death let those who are without sin cast the first stone whoever ain't never done wrong whoever's who's not guilty of being stoned themselves because what he's really saying she deserves to be stoned you're right as soon as we finish throwing her we're going to look at all y'all sin and see which ones what y'all did and we're gonna y'all gonna be next we're gonna start stoning y'all then he knelt back down and start writing don't know what he wrote i suspect he start writing down some of their chicks on the side's name girlfriends or maybe writing down the addresses of their hangout places you don't you didn't do this out in the open you had to go to secret quiet discreet places and one by one they left they left they let her alone they stopped questioning jesus and they left that's pr that's y'all that's profound that they tried to trick him but he didn't let them trick him that's what i love about jesus he don't let he he they tried to capture him uh in in a trick they tried to play some trickery on them they were trying to be tricksters but he didn't let them trick him that's why i love him so i don't believe it means adultery and i don't believe it means adultery because it doesn't account for how the pharisees got shocked at his answer if you read chapter matthew you reach matthew chapter 19 verse 9 and 10 it says they were shocked at his answer if he and if he was saying that you know it was okay um for what and it meant adultery if that's what he meant they wouldn't have been shocked because back in that day uh hopefully you got that down you wrote that down i want to go to the next slide real quick just jot down matthew 19 verses 9 through 10 and we're not going to read it but just read it when you get an opportunity um it doesn't explain um how because jesus they would have been shocked that uh it wouldn't explain uh their shock because uh it would have if he meant adultery then jesus would have been uh siding with some of the teachings of some of the people of that day there was one crowd of people that believed that adultery was ground for a divorce and then there was another crowd that thought that almost any reason was acceptable including bad cooking you know if black if bad cooking was justification for divorce bad cooking you cooked the you cooked the bat you met you burnt the fish the fish you burnt the fish sticks you left you left the rolls in the kitchen too long you forgot to put the seasoning on the meat and it was great if if those could be reasons and there and in that day there were people who had re there was a a one crowd of people and their names were both mentioned there uh they had reasons to believe that these were grounds for divorce but it's critical for you and i to understand jesus wasn't siding with either one of these crowds he wasn't cry he was not siding uh with a adultery and he wasn't siding with those who said almost any reason he wasn't any any he wasn't on either one of their sides uh furthermore he couldn't have been talking about adultery because it conflicts with the image of marriage of what marriage represents let's spend a moment and talk about this i didn't talk about this at the beginning but i'm going to talk about it now marriage reflects the relationship between christ and the church the husband and the wife the husband represents christ the wife represents the church and the institution of marriage represents to the world the love that jesus has for the church he loves us in spite of our adultery y'all in spite of our unfaithfulness in spite of us having our hearts turn to other things to other people and being more loyal to other things and other people and more obligated and in spite of that he loves us he wakes us up every morning even when we miss the mark and do the wrong things he still loves us and cares for us and and provides for us that's what the marriage union is supposed to represent it doesn't represent us to be able to just walk away we're not to do that that's that would be the wrong message to teach and preach it con it conflicts with that image that the church that marriage represents the relationship between christ and the church and it will require us if you won't get divorced when you get divorced you got to take that person to court and the scriptures admonishes us in first corinthians chapter 6 write that down that passage down it would require you to violate that scripture for you to go to court and divorce somebody that's that's never the will of god and finally just i know i'm giving you a whole bunch of verse verses here it doesn't it doesn't it wouldn't call us to a higher standard god has called us as the church to a much higher standard than the world husbands are called to love their wives as christ loved the church we're to love our spouses unconditionally faithfully and i know i'm gonna get a thousand questions on this so i'm prepared for that in just a few moments i'm gonna try to let me finish up just these final few points here and then i'm gonna take your question because i know i got a ton of questions that's coming um i don't believe uh god wants us to lower our standards and that's why i say if you could divorce and walk away then we're failing to call the church to the standard that god calls us for and finally if adultery is ground for divorce then the truth be told we all have grounds to divorce our spouses why because we've all been unfaithful and when i say unfaithful i'm not mean that you necessarily slept with somebody but you looked at somebody you desired somebody jesus said when we read just a few verses before here right here that if you look on a person with lust in your heart with any inkling of desire with any effort of thinking what it would be like you dream about it if you want it if you if you wonder what it would be like to be with that person the bible says you're guilty that's the standard that god elevates and if that's the standard of the of adultery then we all have ground because we've all failed in that regard i don't believe that that's the standard that the lord has has placed before us i believe he's placed something much higher we're called to be much higher than that and uh i you know my job as your pastor as a teacher of the word of god is to preach the truth and not to preach what people want to hear and this is one of the things people don't want to hear and they don't like it because people think god wants them happy god is not interested in your happiness it's not about your pleasure it's not why god he didn't create you for your pleasure he created you for his pleasure we were put on this planet for his pleasure not yours it's for his glory not yours so many people think god is here to make you happy that's not god's purpose so i want to challenge you today i know i know your spouse has upset you and angered you and frustrated you and disappointed you and i i i don't even know how to challenge us to understand the standard that god puts before us and his expectation of us and and here's what i here's what i do try to say to everybody don't rush into any marriage i think people go running to marriage go to get married too quickly you know somebody for a couple weeks couple months and you rushing off getting married don't don't do it spend some time i think you ought to least sit with a person through four seasons at least through a year see how they see how they behave in the summertime see see what comes out of them in the winter see see what they like when the chicks come out are y'all listening to me so um i'm gonna take some questions and uh i know y'all got him i said i was gonna try to get done early enough that you could send me some questions um and i think hopefully they oh yeah oh i got questions they're already here okay here's question number one my husband left me and stated that he plans to file for divorce after the the one-year waiting period if he commits adultery while we are separated am i obligated to still pray for and be ready to reconcile with him if he chooses to come back to the marriage one day yeah uh you know that's that's that's what god did for with us that's what the lord did for us we have backslid we have chased after other gods we have turned our back on god and when we turn around and come back he takes us back with open arms one pastor said he says i'm married to the backslider i'm married to the bachelorette god loves us and he loves us to the depth and to the point no matter what we've done he takes us back and i don't know how y'all feel i'm glad he takes us back i'm glad he took me back in my way with ways i'm glad that no matter what i've done he loved me enough to patiently take me back somebody said i cannot do that in your own strength you can't in your own human strength you cannot that's why you need the lord jesus in your life in your own strengths and abilities it's an impossible task but if you depend on jesus and lean upon him and walk in his ways and apply his word he will give you grace if you humble yourself he will give you grace here's another question should i stay in a physically mentally and verbally abusive marriage is that god's will for marriage that's a great question and i want to spend just a couple of moments talking about that here's number one um first of all if you are in a physically abusive situation never do i tell anybody to stay in a place and nor am i preaching for you to stay in a place where your life is is at risk but here's what i'm telling you to do if you are physically abused the first time the number one time ain't telling you to wait two three four five 15 times the number one time call the po-po call the police immediately please i begging you call the police and let them take that person out remove them from the home and they will see to it that they get help force them to get help if they feel it's okay to inflict physical violence to any person move them out now hear me out on this because some of y'all are not going to agree with this because i know people say about physical that's physical abuse but when you talk about mental abuse and verbal abuse and all of that there's a difference between mental and verbal and emotional abuse you determine to what degree a person inflicts that on you you can say what you want when i was growing up we used to say sticks and stones may break my bones but words would never hurt me you you you can draw the line about how much mental or emotional or verbal abuse they can put on you you can draw the line you don't have to accept what people say about you or what that person says about you i want to i want to encourage you that we have resources to help people who are in such marriages in our bookstore you contact our bookstore and we got one of the books i always recommend a million times it's a rebuilder's guide that helps rebuild marriages it helps broken marriages get rebuilt rebuild this guide call our bookstore and so um but you can determine um i wish i if i had thought about this i would have had a chalkboard that i could draw on here and show you basically that how god formed us and made us you have a there's an outer circle outer ring to us we are we are a tri-human being we have an outer physical body and then we have a soul and yet an inner body and then there's an inner most part of us that's our spirit so um the outer body the outer physical part of you is your body and when people inflict that kind of pain or or hit you or hurt you you call the police and have them removed and and let the government make them get help then there's the inner body that's your soul your mind will and emotions you determine how much pain you allow that to be inflicted upon you you can draw the line there you say i'm not going to listen to those words i'm not going to receive them or accept them i reject that i'm a woman of god i'm a man of god i'm loved by god your words your language that you're the things you're saying to me i'm not going to allow you to hurt me like that you you draw that line then there's a innermost part of you the spirit of you where god takes connections with you you never let them reach that point of your of your spirit man to defile you hurt you to that way you make that determination so uh and i'd say a lot of people when you're in that kind of help you know a person a person just don't start doing these things to you they they've got this is them their makeup and their nature before you get married and that's why i want to spend that's why i'm challenging you today you y'all need to do some pre-marital counseling see see what traits that person has before you get married watch them through four seasons before you get married watch and observe them check check with them you know just do your research that's the best way i know to describe it do your research before you get married whatever issues they have before they get married they'll have it after they get married if they were abusive to you before they'll be abusive after they treated you nonchalantly and negatively before they'll do it after very important i hope i'm making sense to you i know my time is running out and i still got a thousand questions here all right here's several of these questions about remarriage i'm gonna talk about remarriage next week so let's pick up the remarriage issues next week next week um okay so a lot of these questions are i'm not gonna be able to answer all these questions but um we have divorce care let me talk about divorce care for a moment for those who've gone through the tragedy of divorce we have a ministry called divorced care and i want to encourage you to connect with divorce care it can give you answers to help you heal if you've gone through it okay i i know y'all like this to have more and more time with this and maybe maybe when we get started next week i'll pick up and answer some of these questions i didn't get to today to try to be clear with you so thank you for sending in these questions um and i'm going to pray that god helps you i'm going to pray that if you find yourself in trouble if your marriage is in trouble if your home is in trouble if you're in trouble the lord jesus who we serve loves you and wants you to be healed and delivered and i want to make an appeal to you today to reach out to him as a matter of fact like we do every week i tell you to call and uh we can help lead you to a relationship with jesus if you don't have it we have a we have a couple's ministry to help marriages that are in trouble we have counselors to help you if you need help i believe the god we serve loves you malachi 2 says god says i hate divorce and i believe if you cry out to him and reach out to him he'll help you you you concentrate you know a lot of people ask questions about what about the other person i'm telling you today you make the right choice let's let you do the right thing repent of the wrong that you've done some of you married people that you shouldn't marry and the first step you need to do is repent before god and say god forgive me for not listening to you and listening to my flesh repent that you disobeyed god and ask him to heal you and heal your marriage i wish i had more time i'll try to pick up next week i appreciate you all so much joining us and staying with us tuesday after tuesday means the world to me and i want to pray that god continues to bring you whatever you stand in need of we have a ton of ministries to help you we've got ministries to help men who are in trouble to help women who are in trouble husbands who are in trouble wives who are in trouble we can help you father help the people of god help those watching this broadcast who are in trouble in the middle of a situation in drama they don't know what to do where to turn help them father in the precious name of jesus i pray thank you for your mercy thank you for your grace that you've extended to us i pray now i take this moment and cry out to you father for our marriages and for our homes [Music] help us god to live a different life that instead of us trying to be in charge we are listening to you i'm praying for singles today father who may be right on the verge of about to marry somebody they shouldn't even be in relationship with open their eyes almighty god i pray for those marriages that are right now on the verge of collapse marriages where one is filed papers the other person doesn't know what to do father we're crying out to you in the precious name of the lord jesus i pray now father i pray that you move mightily and allow your sons and daughters to see your hand move supernaturally on their behalf in the mighty and precious name of jesus we pray i love you everybody good night you

Channel: Inside FBCG

Views: 89,981

Rating: 4.6766667 out of 5

Keywords: bible study, bible-based church, church, developing, disciples, dynamic, fbcg, first baptist church of glenarden, god, gospel, gospel in bible, jesus, jesus loves me, jesus songs, jesus take the wheel, john jenkins, john k. jenkins, justice and righteousness, king, lord, ministry, ministry center, pastor john k. jenkins sr., powerful, powerful teaching, powerful word, praise, praise and worship, worship, worship center, Divorce and Remarriage

Id: lXlL6lPrbOA

Length: 53min 18sec (3198 seconds)

Published: Sun May 02 2021