The ROAST of The Boys

foreign nice to meet you don't touch me sounds good hey you look like a cross between Ringo's star and a Golem take off your hat oh my God put it back on I love the uh 1978 Abercrombie finch look that's nice keep your hands away from yourself please did you ever have people pick on you because the size of your nose oh if you taught it how to write you'd have an extra hand thanks for the idea I I'll try that I'm sure the whole state of Texas could fit in one nostril in Mexico and the others so are you on step one or two in the rehab program [Music] I'm not in a rehab program so I see you're in denial I understand you have a personality disorder you have many voices in your head yeah can you give us a few examples I have my deep voice sometimes I like to talk with different accents and stuff like that so sometimes they talk to each other so have a conversation a combo conversation do you want to be included no oh okay cool what exactly am I going to get from the shopping market today well I don't really know because we got rice we got the chicken and meatballs we got um I don't know exactly what else we need it's going to be a lot um you can only drink water you know don't just say you can only do so starch with your stuff that was uh boring yeah did you ever feel you could make people happier if you just left no would you do me a favor yeah say Scooby-Doo Scooby-Doo what's his poor Scooby's partner's name Jackie Shaggy Shaggy Shaggy yeah what's his girlfriend's name does he have a girlfriend I thought the dog was his girlfriend that is gross so are you saying that you're into animal husbandry I never said that you inferred that a man had a dog for a girlfriend that was the show they made a really big ham sandwich [Laughter] excuse me could we get a urine test on him what I just passed one three days ago was that from your probation or your mother [Laughter] have you ever considered doing a balding man commercial foreign I can tell you're racist [Laughter] what is this you have beautiful eyes thank you I would advise you not to swim on your back when you're in the ocean people might mistake you for a shark foreign I'm trying man do you always wear that hat it's a beanie do you know the difference between a beanie and a hat yes I know the difference your head is too [ __ ] big for a beanie [Music] you're a very large man I'm very wide I'm sorry it's okay it only sucks on plane rides that's probably why you're on the banned list [Laughter] we don't talk about that in public you eat so much paper you could [ __ ] your own autobiography how do you know about the paper I know a lot of things who who are you like the underwear you're the only man I know that wears a g-string I don't prove it I'm not I'm not going to do that it's because I'm right [Laughter] there's nothing wrong with a g-string you know okay you just have to change it more than once a week I can't tell if you're a predator or doing chemo oh my God this dude's Stone Face don't look at us man I can't look at him he's wigging me out you look like a starving populist begging for some attention [Laughter] were you abandoned earlier in your life that was not a hard question it deserves yes or no simply answer the question yes well I'm sorry I didn't realize you were going to start crying you're a sensitive man aren't you what is this so I just don't like you is it true that men with big nose yes I can tell when you're lying [Music] you're lying right now it's true no it's not you're lying telling the truth your nose Wiggles when you lie [Laughter] help no help no Jesus Christ you're just sitting here roasting me that's the idea you need a girlfriend United a little too quickly on that one [Laughter] you're lonely aren't you a little bit that's okay what have you discovered about being alone seek deep inside of you what have you found about being alone it's peaceful peaceful meditative um so really you don't need a girlfriend no you're okay alone yeah you're one sad [ __ ] you look like an incel [Laughter] on man gerd boy oh no yeah are you taking things for it I meant medication for it now yeah I would suggest you have your uvulia removed oh do you know where your uvula is right right in the back of the throat very nice do you snore yes sometimes yeah how do you know if you're [ __ ] asleep yeah whoa they've told me sometimes but I don't know so you're admitting to sleeping with them sometimes that's why you're the boys man when I get older I'm going to get a ranch and name it after you because it's past your time bro Holy Spirit smile for me what it's a smile never mind I want to say one word to you dental hygiene well there's many answers to that question but one of them is I don't like you now hopefully sorry bro you're on your own who do you keep looking for help somewhere other than you I'll help you I don't want that you don't want my help I don't want nothing from you dude really I bet you want something from me you need my approval Josh has daddy issues you're just coming at me did you enjoy it enjoy what that's what I thought get me out of here I know why you wear that so your forehead wouldn't flash bang me laughs [Music] I would ask you if you've done any work in public schools but then the court order says you can't go near them I like the uh early Lands End look in fact weren't you an Abercrombie and finch model I didn't even know that is you're speaking way your age man that's that's a clothing store okay they're thinking about coming out with an early pudgy model oh [ __ ] did you were you raised in a fun house you've got the face for it I take that back I think you were fired from a fun house because of your face [Laughter] what songs do you know by heart yes my ABCs that's a song yeah could we hear it a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p thank you thank you you're welcome you can pay me the 20 bucks now come on no forgetting you to sing that I mean do I get a trophy I mean I'm sure like with an older age you get the only trophy you get is atrophy [Laughter] I'm surprised you know the meaning of that word since it has three syllables [Music] it's okay to come out of the closet what not gay it's all right we love you anyway I don't believe that you don't believe that we love you I don't believe that you can feel any other emotion than hate I'm I'm loving you right now that doesn't feel like that feelings aren't real feelings are reaction to a perceived wound that's never been healed apparently you were very wounded as a child tell me about it in front of all of them well you're part of the boys so let us know well I I had a pet snake that was named eraser and he got really sad and I went to feed him a mouse and then the mouse killed him that's a true story and from that you learn that life can be traumatic yeah and that things you love can be taken away from you oh yeah so that's why you kind of shut down shut down yeah you don't have any personality oh [ __ ] so we can go one way or the other are you ready to tell us the truth I I want to get out of this that was an easy question again yes or no answer yes you ready to tell us the truth yes how many times did you masturbate when you were 12. I don't [ __ ] know it was a big year for me foreign I don't think anyone would describe it as big set myself up for that one I do want to congratulate you for what for becoming a citizen thanks you're lying again [Laughter] actually not a citizen yet how did he know he lied to us I'm actually from Ice who the [ __ ] set me up with this guy you sure is ugly [Music] [Laughter] what is your favorite food if I may ask I like a lot of foods so you like seafood no I don't like seafood well you eat everything you see Jesus Christ what size shoe do you wear 13. no you don't yes I do you've been wearing the wrong size shoe all your life how do you know that because you wouldn't have to wear a beanie if you wore the right size shoe do you have a lot of headaches sometimes start wearing a size 14. I get it why do you have that Dickie cowlick in your hair it's just the American I've got for I've had for a while military standards is the front military standard not anymore by the way thank you for your service appreciate it what branch were you in Army and what was your job Calvary Scott Calvary Scott you had your unit uh fourth Squadron second Calvary regimen stationed in Germany they'll stick Germany yeah you ever see any action uh I got technically deployed but I didn't call it a deployment because it was with NATO so you played it being a soldier essentially [Laughter] that explains a lot I'm glad that we're having this therapy session yeah it means a lot you're lying you're doing work I'm lying yeah I don't think I'm lying that's because you've you've you've fooled yourself all of your life you're in great denial just repeat after me I am boring I I am boring oh is that so hard own what you are who are you your best friend or your worst nightmare and what you say in the next three seconds will predicate which I am today one check this guy what do you mean check I don't know it's just it's scary I'm jealous of you you'll never have to go to the Proctologist why because you're a perfect [ __ ] laughs you were in Harry Potter weren't you nope you look like Hagrid I do it kind of does the only difference is you don't have his personality I heard you had to get you know pasties on for a recent shoot I did yeah for the PEX being too big stuff like that turns you on doesn't it no it's just that you know in this day and age I'm sure the only way you can have a hot body now is cremation foreign [Laughter] I'm so [ __ ] scared right now you know with eyes like that if you wore corduroy pants you could meet a one-man band [Music] okay repeat after me okay I have no clue what I'm saying I have no clue what I'm saying that's the first truthful thing you said oh thank you that wasn't a compliment I understand you like Chinese food you bore me thank you I'm gonna cry I would recommend that it's a good look for you weeping might attract women help you you do cry a lot help me but then again that wouldn't be appropriate with the court order get me out of here he knows about the court order shut up I think you should sit down for a moment I'm sitting down elsewhere why'd you do it I didn't want to that's not what she said [Music] oh you you think just because you're you got the face of a cop old guy you can just threaten me and intimidate me I didn't intimidate you I ask you questions but you're very intimidating that's because you have Early Childhood issues which you need to heal that little boy inside of you needs to be loved come here let me give you a hug oh oh okay thank you that's the nicest thing you've done so far thank you go sit down and take a [ __ ] shower [Applause] so here's something I want you to think about you ready life is meant to be lived in the moment not through what you have but what you can give what do you think of that statement it's facts I agree then how come you're so [ __ ] up there's nothing to do it has everything to do with it you can be [ __ ] up and give stuff away we were talking about a deeper level but apparently it's incapable of going to that deep level you are a surface person correct I can certainly see BYU don't have a girlfriend well I I thank you for this time together thank you I really don't get the [ __ ] out of here foreign I believe they call it morbidly obese [Laughter] oh my god oh man when was the last time you looked down and actually saw your feet yesterday did you have to bend over a little I'm done with you let's talk about you okay because you've been talking to us this entire time and yeah I've just gotten like a couple Vibes you know all right it should be completely straightforward with me I will okay are you gay why do you want to have sex with me not what I asked at all that's that's not then why the hell do you need to know I I was just wondering I well you're wondering because you're a latent sexuality isn't it that's right I it's okay juicy it's all right it's all right to be speechless that was rude of me I know but for some reason I want to be rude to you who made you like this who [Laughter] what the boys foreign The Boys Are Back in Town [Laughter]

Channel: The Boys

Views: 4,241,424

Keywords: VR, Virtual Reality, The Boys, JoshDub, Mully, EddieVR, YourNarrator, Juicy, Comedy, Funny, Gaming

Id: lIuxQ18AZCo

Length: 26min 1sec (1561 seconds)

Published: Sat Dec 17 2022