The Life & Times Of Art Vandelay | Seinfeld

forest district collie court latham massachusetts is now in session the honorable judge arthur vanderlei presiding mandela the judge's name is vandoy vander who jerry did you hear that yeah yeah i think that's a good sign [Music] hi i'm uh i'm here to see you mr odd vandalism sorry sir there is no mr vandalise here well let me let me just uh check and make sure i have the right name it seems awesome if i see her what do i say that i'm doing here in the building oh you came to see me i work in the building what do you do i'm an architect you're an architect i'm not i don't see architecture coming from you i suppose you could be an architect i never said that i was the architect just something else she's not even gonna ask if we see her which is remote well what do you want me to say i just wandered in here we're having lunch with a friend he works in the building what is his name bert harr bin's son bird harbinson bert harbin's son right it sounds made up feel good all right um art core art core valet corville yeah what does he do he's an importer just imports no exports he's an importer exporter okay lane ever call you back no i guess she's still mad i don't understand you you never talk to her about other women never wait a second that's her on the right i forgot who i am who am i you're you we're having lunch with art corville vandelay corville let me be the architect i can do it hey hey uh pamela's birthday party didn't i see you there jerry is george i'm sorry vanessa uh nice to meet you ah segment bennett robin's up and heimit's hair that's right yeah what are you doing here uh we're meeting a friend of ours for lunch works here in the building yeah art vandelay which company i don't know uh he's an importer importer and exporter he's an importer exporter i'm uh i'm an architect really okay well what do you design uh railroads i thought engineers do that they can so have you ever done this kind of work before well the you know book reports that kind of stuff [Laughter] do you read i i like mike lupica mike lupica he's a sports writer for the daily news i find him very insightful no no no i mean i mean authors [Laughter] lot of good ones a lot of good ones uh i i don't even want to mention anybody cause i'm afraid i'm gonna leave somebody out then name a couple who do i like i like uh art ven delay art vandeley he's an obscure writer beat nick from the village [Music] what's he written venetian blinds you know you only have two more weeks before your benefits run out yes and i was hoping uh perhaps to get a 13-week extension if that's possible so where have you been looking for work well you know what i've discovered mrs circle it's not so much to look into as the listening i listen for work now as i'm looking and listening i'm also looking you cannot discount looking it's sort of a combination it's looking and listening listening and looking but you must look can you be specific about any of these companies specific uh let's see i've walked in and out of so many buildings they all blend in together just give me one name one name absolutely uh let's see there's uh uh vandelay industries i uh just saw them i got very close they're very close and what type of company is that latex latex manufacturing necessary and you interviewed there yes for a sales position latex salesman the uh selling of latex and latex related products they just wouldn't give me a chance damn it now i'm gonna need an address and a phone number for this uh vandalist company you like gum because i have a friend in the gum business i i got a gum guy i make one phone call i have boxes that come delivered right to your daughter the address the adjusting i say madness you recognize it no aj very funny really this is very funny the address uh uh vandelay is um uh 129 west 81st street it's a very small industry vandalia it's one of the reasons i wanted to work for them the phone number that's uh kl5 8383 are you planning on calling them soon because they're very strange alex as soon as i'm done with you well um you know what i'll check in with you next week uh i gotta run now because i oh yeah i got a full plate okay all right really good too did anybody call here asking for vandelay industries no what happened to you all right listen close i was at the unemployment office and i told them i was very close to getting a job with vandella industries and i gave them your phone number so well now when the phone rings you have to answer vandalize industries i'm vandalized right what is that you're in latex and what do i do with latex i don't know you manufacture it right here in this little apartment and what do i say about you you're considering hiring me for your latex salesman i'm gonna hire you as my latex salesman right i don't think so why would i do that because i asked you to if you think i'm looking for someone to just sit at a desk pushing papers around you can forget it enough headaches is trying to manufacture the stuff mandalay industries kel varnson speaking may we help you yellow what delay now you're industries way way off well yeah yeah that's the right number but this is an apartment no problem [Applause] how did you know who they wanted [Applause] you want to be my latex sale right this way mr vandelay wow this is a lovely apartment lovely your kids are gonna go crazy i uh i wonder if i could see the bathrooms um preferably one with some paint thinner and uh some rags it's down the hall oh hello all right mr vandelle of course you two know each other mr pennypacker uh yes uh oh yeah i wanted to uh stop by and make sure that my shark tank fixed it uh hello mr packer this is mr van der lay and you know mr varnsson bartson penny packer vandalism penny packer fonson mandalay okay all right what is his name who is he art vandalic art vandelay this is my boyfriend that's your boyfriend what does he do he's an importer just imports no exports he's an importer exporter okay so i'm dating art vandelay what is the problem we're discussing yes how about this how about he's thinking of quitting the exporting and just focusing in on the import and this is causing a problem because why not do both well i i didn't tell you i got to go uh meet elaine elaine what for i don't know she she's having some problems with this guy she's seeing i didn't even know she was dating anyone yeah yeah she's seeing this guy aunt vandalay so what does he do he's an importer exporter what kind of problems are they having well he um he wants to uh quit the exporting and uh focus just on the importing and it's a problem because she thinks the exporting is as important as the importer are you having an affair with elaine all right come on i'm having an affair with elaine if i was having an affair with elaine i wouldn't tell you i'm going to see elaine i would i would make up some other person to tell you i was going to go see and then i would go see elaine uh-huh uh elaine i have to ask you a question oh sure are you having an affair with george [Laughter] obviously you know why would you think i was having an affair with george oh because he said that he had to talk with you earlier about some problem that you were having yeah yeah i did have to talk with him i i definitely had to talk with him i had my problem with my boyfriend art vandelay yeah art vandalism i'm sorry i i feel like an idiot oh no that's okay oh just forget that we ever talked forgot okay no problem so was george helpful at all yeah oh yes yes he was very helpful um you know because art and i were getting into this whole thing about his business um you know he's an importer exporter yeah george felt that i was too adamant in my stand that art should focus on the exporting and forget about the importing wait a minute i thought that art wanted to give up the exporting what did i say the importing i did ah so what does he uh import chips oh what kind of chips potato ah some corn and what does he export diapers i'm sorry i don't know it's okay okay [Music] hi hi so george what does art vandelay import matches long matches [Music] you

Channel: Seinfeld

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Id: Ugx06TlVyw4

Length: 13min 53sec (833 seconds)

Published: Tue Nov 16 2021