The Chicago Stand-Up Comedy Special w Karlous Miller, DC Young Fly, Chico Bean ft. Hannibal Buress

yo give it up for Jay in one time y'all you got the raccoon hat on that meeting is about to be some [ __ ] in here tonight job what's up Chicago the 85,000 was in the building y'all I got Chico being in the beauty young [Applause] I got these new jump fly in the building y'all and the [ __ ] sensei we got Carlos pillar in the building y'all if y'all watch the 85 South Shore do to make some noise make sure if you born here subscribe tell to people we bout to get this [ __ ] off on the [ __ ] TV we're doing a job we appreciate all y'all coming out here Chicago feeling cold as [ __ ] but we didn't came from the ACE and we bout to make this [ __ ] happen make sure you follow us on Twitter go to youtube and subscribe follow us on Instagram and on Facebook we bout to make this [ __ ] happy y'all y'all ready to get it crackin in here alright John the first man about to break out you see him I wanna lean out he's hands by the old school rap battle he's a bad [ __ ] y'all start clapping right now give it up [Applause] Chicago only squeeze me and hold me that's what I hook them up and told me man Shivaji run my mother's with a golf because that'd be flipping up like gold gotta get paid in this age my Pickers I made this every chopping up a fairy wind if it's already too you better settle it appearing where did you get assigned even on a penny she's talking right a petty with and then I can't cuz I got really will get a whippet say picking up who can against the day thinking that minister the up in the hopper for me picking the fee I kinda left us no 3 then we get in the bed I believe in over froze leg push you area together until you get up in them holes here how I mean is now focusing on but it's the power will not be happening true this [ __ ] never know when I when I work with get plug with a bit of toe before the girl when I'm her gonna freakin in the turn wouldn't have to get paid from the changer because you know she got what she paid boat I got a same here call now is people with the game of ways to make mold let me play with your emotions hold to the rhythm of her hair hair Chicago what the [ __ ] is that man I got you under my complete control I know what's working for the diamonds and gold and Oh refocus in the night at emotions home chiller put them up a high hat singer puffing loud back let me step and let your mind body and soul I bet you want to try that we broke into the night that every baby can you bad at I got you under my complete control you know it's worth morning check so either [ __ ] me going at home i sleeping on the back don't put you running from a macro later on your back slope cuz you know i got you at my last home play a man like an afro coming singer due to this day as the Epiphany yeah but you know this is fearless like I notice when I focus is my ID pay the lowest if you didn't notice that you poses here and I put women of us feel like a puppet a prank boom think we came for the another fitness permanent and filling them up with adrenaline got a kingdom was weakened approaching up okay up like a gentleman sufficient in surrender and then the winning the field for the flop super bomb sack with the right place in the right line in the right bag you can get a lifetime contract may be wise and today look into your eyes and show the frequencies by the by sugar over to the cream later all here also behind sound without lines overs like your mind having meeting mega-disaster like the master love but the poor [ __ ] bringing you for every penny you earned I have to steal shutter faster look I guess it cuz I'm cold she she was homies gonna be I bet you take a show near we're game recognize game let you land in the brain super pictures we try the gold deep cut it on [ __ ] I miss you pal go [ __ ] what's up on phone it'll [ __ ] I'm in Chicago know that gangbangers in the building tonight Megan black p stone ranges [ __ ] folk corner hustlers vicelords bees gd's Latin Kings [ __ ] the police every gang in this [ __ ] [ __ ] with this city man as you can see my I had to come out to that twister man that's one of my favorite rappers like that Nick is in my top five I know yeah I wonder how the [ __ ] did you learn that goofy [ __ ] [ __ ] we we from Chicago and we don't wrap that [ __ ] that used to be a punishment for me when I was little so what a god my uncle who's gangsters and [ __ ] right so I used to get in trouble at the house and I'd be in the living room crying cuz I can't go outside mom [ __ ] around shoot big hit aunts little [ __ ] buster okay like I stay in the house see the light look it's what i'ma do if you learn this song by the time I get back in here you can go back outside if you don't know it I'm a peach OS you can still go outside but imma beat your ass that's why I know that [ __ ] cuz I was scared of them [ __ ] and that's the thing man I've been you know I've been in Chicago before but I would say that this really the first time I came and got to really kick it with the people that I know [ __ ] with us so I appreciate y'all got us performing in the mall [ __ ] many Apollo Theater [ __ ] only thing missing is that little would the roughly I love Chicago man and some things I learned this time being here that I don't love though whoever the [ __ ] made that loop [ __ ] it's up my whole thing I'm talking about down down to the pubic hairs [ __ ] swallow my whole [ __ ] I'm trying to find my hotel last night [ __ ] I was three minutes away for I went 15 minutes that [ __ ] capstan turn left on wacker turn left for an East lower wacker turn left for North Columbus turn left for North Columbus turn right on East wacker upper wacker turn left on right lower wacker north wacker turn left on East wacker Columbus Drive turn up like what the [ __ ] I did turn left 300 times you ever been so lost you get to looking out your window like it's raining I [Applause] can't find [ __ ] around this [ __ ] man who made this [ __ ] [ __ ] true story I got so aggravated I drove back there oh hey I got a room by the airport I was like [ __ ] it I'm just gonna had two rooms [ __ ] I'm not driving this [ __ ] no more and then I learned about the beefs between hurls and Uncle Remus this time who win who better hurls our uncle ringing Harold and that's when I know all the [ __ ] from the south side say hurls all the [ __ ] from the west side say Uncle Remus and i'ma tell you i'ma go with all four Remus i'ma tell you why i'ma tell you why no timeout timeout wait a minute hold up first of all hold up first of all dumb Broca's his hair long phone them gray home bro i up the pole on y'all [ __ ] in here cool fans then you focus is el football about that [ __ ] all y'all [ __ ] [ __ ] I hit the wound whop the BAM and then I went over that [ __ ] I'm gonna tell you out why I say that though I'm gonna tell you out way I say that cuz this the reason it's a bunch of hurls [ __ ] everywhere and I went to the one in the loop [ __ ] cursed me out time out let me finish [ __ ] let me tell a story so so I go to the one in the loop [ __ ] cuz be like bro Murch that she went to the one on a loop bruh like what the [ __ ] Murch mean [ __ ] I don't know what that Bank he's like dick though you got to go to the one on 96 ninety-seven for what up see see that's why I pick awful Remus it's too many places I got to go in Chicago without my GPS [ __ ] that like I went to the mall for the hurls it was so dangerous over that [ __ ] I was like [ __ ] [ __ ] the chicken just get me back to my hotel room nice [ __ ] I seen 30 chief Keef's I was like all living things got pistols every last one the [ __ ] was just well involved like oh no [ __ ] get me back in the car I don't even what no mouse all stiff [ __ ] gonna shoot some Mouse sauce out of me [ __ ] if I [ __ ] around over here [ __ ] I should've went to 82nd eighty-seven that's the best one on 87 which gang is on 87 so I know how to wear my hat when I go over that [ __ ] hey 87 well that's the thing Uncle Remus on the Westside is simple it's on the west side and i'ma tell you something you don't hear a lot about the west side but the website is [ __ ] up [ __ ] I was like I'm from DC that [ __ ] like southeast I was like oh this is the west side okay I ain't never seen so many killers in jail a pail a coach in my life I don't even know they was still selling it [ __ ] that nigga's head diamonds and [ __ ] on the back of they pay ladies I'm like [ __ ] it looked like oh six out this [ __ ] these [ __ ] is gangster [ __ ] head twisted so far you couldn't even see this [ __ ] cheekbones I like dayum I am in the shaft for real learning city don't man I love it you know I mean this is one of the most beautiful cities in the world and for and for everybody watching this man that people be lying going to Chicago is dangerous no it is no it's not like that this is one of the most beautiful cities he's some of the realest [ __ ] in the world they show you love all you got to do is not be both this is hell when you come on phone emigres you both is his hell shorty [ __ ] is wrong with you [ __ ] Murch you won't wipe the BAM [ __ ] [ __ ] hit me with that [ __ ] don't ever answer Chicago [ __ ] four directions that [ __ ] [ __ ] me up last night I'm like a a bro I'm trying to get to the the Swissotel thing he said on phone mmm I packed this we should do whoo you won't go down and hit that whoop right there why you gonna hit that right right there on phone then you gonna pass a little tree feed them they're gonna be out there wah wah wah wah wah it'll be turned up right for real they gon shot in there for real and you won't go back up that way you gonna hit there left and that's what you won't need to be at right there like [ __ ] I'm doing in this city but is this gonna get me y'all in this [ __ ] what's up champ are you doing that day looking like a star this mofo hey you got a cardigan hoodie on [ __ ] that [ __ ] is dead figured she had fur hold up the two of hoodie that's how I know all y'all [ __ ] gangstas isn't they can say I'm casual but if a [ __ ] play on phone em imma up this [ __ ] on my up this [ __ ] roll it over my head man this [ __ ] really looked like the Apollo there used to be a skating rink [ __ ] they put some chairs and his [ __ ] look at my man and then my bear and the bomb [ __ ] poof yeah I pay extra for the boost with the tables does y'all pay extra for the little [ __ ] def Comedy Jam booths name remember that the old def Comedy Jam [ __ ] [ __ ] that's what Flavor Flav and all the stars used to sit every bite there y'all [ __ ] must be from all the guys must be the gangbang representation we made sure bad [ __ ] gangbangers across from each other and we don't have no problem and shout-out to the [ __ ] up there who got they [ __ ] all Groupon salute to y'all I can't see none of y'all up that [ __ ] [ __ ] I hope you can see me down this [ __ ] cuz [Applause] maybe you got to pose like you want a trophy to see them on front and waving the lights and think I don't know that you cousin probably crazy man logic ah go man this is this is one of my favorite places for various reasons like I said it twist is one of my favorite rappers but also and I and I know I might catch some flack for this but I don't give a [ __ ] I'll Kelly listen I understand how some people happy to support him he and he that first of all let me tell you something I am a professional and minding my own [ __ ] business okay I I don't give a [ __ ] who are Kelly [ __ ] alright it's none of my business all I care about is that he keep making music that I can talk to and and when they come now that that [ __ ] is the greatest that [ __ ] is the greatest man standing here looking in the mirror saying damn to myself I should have known that they would come to find somebody else and all the things I took her through she shouldna lasted this long now I'm in the telephone booth all the entire wrong [ __ ] the [ __ ] now only put him out the house kept his little cellphone made him go to the phone booth [ __ ] [ __ ] degree he's so great he bought mr big's back Nick mr. Biggs was 80 years old [ __ ] that's how great our Kelly is what the hell is goin on between the sheets in my home I'm about to have a fit how did I get into this [ __ ] and never came home with you daddy warm on back to where you will wake my ass hit the streets your ass is Gretna mr. Biggs before you dump honey wait I was gonna say move this cat looks real familiar oh and don't I know you from somewhere a long time ago no no I don't think so well well I feel I know you brother very real shut up don't you see two men I talk in I told your ass to get to walk in now I think y'all better leave this play or what [ __ ] how do you sleep over Kelly [ __ ] that [ __ ] the greatest man if I want to talk that [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] you mean to tell me I'm not gonna have 12 play no mo cuz this thing I don't give a [ __ ] [ __ ] that [ __ ] is Amanda and I have an affinity for people who have problems I come from Washington DC I come from the home of the man who got caught smoking crack but let me tell you how real my city is all right first of all Marion Barry is the first black president to me I'll give a [ __ ] with nobody say I love that name that [ __ ] save so many lives in the city he created this program called the summer job work program right and everybody from the ages of 12 to 18 was guaranteed a job in the summertime they paid you from the government and that kept a lot of us from selling dope and shooting at each other and [ __ ] that's the first thing and and the [ __ ] said a month that's the second thing he said it on the tape this [ __ ] set me up what else is there to say after that what else that [ __ ] had the city lid you can go get a bag of weed and a bus pass out the same building when that [ __ ] was the [ __ ] man dead [ __ ] saved them that a half the city I was like [ __ ] will if that's what crack make that [ __ ] do we need to get that [ __ ] some more crack cuz that nigga's the greatest crackhead of all time everybody in here know a crackhead you ain't never known a crackhead to run the city you know crackheads they run around the city but you don't know nothing running the city link didn't I only did the [ __ ] go to G he's got caught smoking crack went to jail came back home and got re-elected [ __ ] that's what it is we got to support our people [ __ ] got a problem - [ __ ] that if they do good [ __ ] we support them and I'll Kelly is the greatest to ever [ __ ] do it [ __ ] chastise me I don't give a [ __ ] suck it [ __ ] [ __ ] ass [ __ ] that's right my [ __ ] up there on phone them Nick for the rest of the night on brownie whoo this is gonna be a great night I can feel it's a toggle y'all ready to keep this going y'all ready to keep this going that's what it is and just know don't throw your hands up if I can see you because I don't want to mimic and then I got beef and [ __ ] my man right here keep going like this I'm like which one is that [ __ ] I don't know which one that is there might be one I don't want to claim just yet but we bout to turn it up man I got my partner gray come to the [ __ ] stage and I need y'all to show that on bro damn [ __ ] I'm growing in my knees y'all - oh my my [ __ ] Amon [ __ ] the look like it's a fifi in this [ __ ] you know him you seen them everywhere movies TV all that one of the hosts of the 85 south show and wanted to call this [ __ ] in the [ __ ] world I need y'all to start making some noise right now put your hands together from the west side of Atlanta Georgia that hot is young [ __ ] and the [ __ ] game put your hands together for d.c your flag [Applause] goddamn DJ I could get no music they'd walk I don't know they live without your [ __ ] out we got a white people interrogates about real white white yeah you know meaning now then you try to pawn white [ __ ] how you know me did we check that [ __ ] the [ __ ] you updated the top tube [ __ ] on even he hit me in my head was machine [ __ ] that hey there busy why y'all was singing when they were singing to Mister being so the whole time what the hell they know what the hell is going on [ __ ] you know this song I don't know this son Holly I would hear that goddamn who thought I got Selena [Applause] [Music] cut that [ __ ] off making you late stupid ever hey hey first time on the job and anytime look about Hey look like either took a lace-front oh god I don't care I'll be I'll be scratching like girl [ __ ] what kind of business it is ladies we own lace front is purely a [ __ ] get a new one Galvatron occluders now I wanna [ __ ] like dance nice care [ __ ] so tell your friend and scam is over with that [ __ ] be different to leave you like oranges [ __ ] yeah are we having a little split let it be like oh we'll be all right big boy you got to split nobody start looking at the health oh hey any looking at hug what you lookin at yo hey what's up people in the back bag oh what a hair they find this goddamn Cathedral a hair this is the Cathedral hey man you already know what time it is for DC on flashy Kobe hey Carlos smell of Jacksonville we come in by oh so December 6 huh what's going man I know boom going good I just know what the Union you know I thought it was a bank it's a Thursday at 7 p.m. on the horse show one show go ahead one show on work once the show sellout wear long hair you know one so we might have to add another silver come and see cool it's the Union Center don't worry about Jackson for the overtime genius yeah what don't get the TV and when you look him up when you see they sold out and five South show.com that's where it's gonna be right here right go get your ticket you know - yeah what part of Chicago you from [ __ ] from Heaney from hear anything from Illinois glass you from me walking when what happened what you're doing now you know they have you to her they all kill us think it's from Milwaukeean hold you from Milwaukee to I hear it stupid a plan for us it's mealtime meal time you commit walking hello you've been over here Chicago I think it is helpers day [ __ ] I think I'm happy to be out of have mail pouch [ __ ] I ain't never been to Chicago this is nice this you're perceiving 88 on a field trip stupid ass [Applause] I love [ __ ] ain't never been nowhere okay what you do mere town [Applause] you know I think I got notes out you gotta think about as you see how we're gonna breathe I feel I got me clam heat a new [ __ ] now I'm in town what you do when you brought me you know what lady pump you remember you'll see the I well who else water up they see this money who else had been oh well Ohio uh I think I will head ask Rojo hi Oh [Applause] oh yeah I got the ambling out clover about anything stupid Ohio hello I love you better in Chicago oh yeah so use it through it through now II know you hear you just ride through world I'm Aiden stop back [ __ ] I ran through brother what you do for a limo hire hole oh so good [Applause] sitting at Ohio put y'all [ __ ] all jail charm your pants [ __ ] get out show them your pants yellow Cincinnati Ohio [Applause] [Music] yes a machine yes [Applause] oh no stupid when I get this [ __ ] from over he said look new hit look new oh no like it's all but it's new no [ __ ] like new oh [ __ ] yeah like this they're like two years [Music] [Music] yeah wheels on it all right yeah jo-ann you ready man you ready get this on Rosa Congo y'all ready man y'all muhfuckas is lit okay here we got ill town we got time oh hi okay who else it a bit she sound like the price is right all y'all [ __ ] wrong okay we got Detroit and it bit for you too skinny Detroit [ __ ] Elvis stand up stand up this [ __ ] here needy right here damn I see why you moved for Detroit yeah damn [ __ ] looking for food what you do for a living Detroit what you say hello wait a minute what's he saying he not from y'all hello hello wait a minute out there [ __ ] drunk in deep is they saying [ __ ] together feedback from go to the car huh [Applause] oh yeah we can you one more time what what's that what's that what's that how you know what a [ __ ] is wrong he just cuz you ain't seen him at church [ __ ] that on me he I've got about I don't know [Applause] if it's any got no car you ain't gonna see no about it means you left and our baby people who in the house he ain't from where I'm from [ __ ] you won't even know what you from okay we got Detroit Detroit Cincinnati we already know about Cincinnati b31 Fox I know [ __ ] [ __ ] start giving me a hit number three one pow pow pow sign know what you do for a living salut you will get a well that we're proud of he'll hit y'all right now we're gonna wet house hello wait a minute god damn [ __ ] this night y'all watch your time to get put off heaven let me get the one in the bank at a slow Seattle welcome Seattle I'm a been to Seattle before which I'll administer yet oh why the weather like that the Sun ain't never out this [ __ ] is depressing is hell my first time that the clouds was in my face [ __ ] that's why y'all here that's what got this thanks anyway what are you Frost I face are you broke last night are you cross night calcine who can cows in inhibit [ __ ] LCA Popovich I want you here by yourself right no matter what answers you [ __ ] running from the district [Applause] oh you from the south side you crazy [ __ ] you for the South Side Chicago you crazy what a South Side and south side Hey I won't everybody to start praying right now cuz ya'll [ __ ] still alive thank you lord why our [ __ ] be killing like a [ __ ] butler it's beautiful our wait times it's so beautiful and city man Chicago guy so beautiful and city just over can side with this [ __ ] world go to the side [ __ ] y'all ready y'all ready to continue to show Mexicans y'all ready continue to so they'll know who coming out late this out I don't know where y'all live yeah just see some [ __ ] opening just came in you know what you know me he's not Mexican what you in what you in white you sure you know the low who knows the stress to me ma [Applause] hey you brainwashed you are a [ __ ] okay okay y'all ready Detroit got a couple of lines in you before you faint make it you good but it's next thing on by the Brico anybody y'all thought Chico was the [ __ ] the good thing I was a [ __ ] this [ __ ] right here is a blob ants [ __ ] fool Chicago y'all make some noise for my dog my [ __ ] [ __ ] Carlos Miller [Applause] what's happening Oh turn it over I can hit it [ __ ] I can't his party is partly y'all funk too cuz [ __ ] the moon rocks Chicago is negative so me some rocks like [ __ ] I got some weed but do you want some more rocks away yes I don't even know what that [ __ ] doing is we with weed on it you know I'm with that [ __ ] I don't know if you posed to smoke it or eat it we in this [ __ ] tonight look at Chicago right I think I love is getting stances it's the only city with [ __ ] are robbed you and try to sell your [ __ ] back they're gonna have [ __ ] divided wait you took everything look at all these [ __ ] women in here what everybody knows good the good puss is upstairs I'm not about to argue with y'all y'all on the float they put the good puss on the top shelf then ain't Bush I don't even have to [ __ ] didn't know if it was the good fellas if you look at her fingers and she needs a fill-in a lot of fellas don't know what the feeling is if she got a space between two fake nail in the real one that's some good [ __ ] right there and you just don't know you thirty two dollars away from having a bad [ __ ] well I've been walking around the city all day laughing at the fat [ __ ] with the leaning up the hooks be lean they don't even be Oh that'd be rugs no some stupid ants boots ladies please don't win your fake hooks they were black but you warm all lands winning that ain't light gray oh no pitches away me I hear too much you'll need a [ __ ] but you need some new book comes down here to talk [ __ ] I see all kind of fan women in here tonight fine with me the other night with some stomach tuck then they panties that I've been trying to trigger their Bulls in fact your then stomach is Toto let me see how big the force is who with the stomach out the pan ladies morning goddamn stomach got them panties they bullshitting they don't even know we like that goddamn stomach boy your stomach out let me get out women I care about stupid [ __ ] women I have bad new titties I like the old ones keep your titties the same titties you grew up with I don't give a [ __ ] if they sang when you take your robbed dumped it is supposed to do that don't it is this tired they go today natural position once you take the brow the tendons go where they want to go so sick of being by this [ __ ] just wanna hang over here on the right side [ __ ] can't even come over here let me find them dumb ass titties be sittin right here under the chin hell no real [ __ ] the scoop them titties up you supposed to catch the chin it before we hit the armpit cuz you don't want to be sucking the other antenna if the owner until you had your whole mouth numb look at the og this [ __ ] know that [ __ ] right there done did it but you can't take [ __ ] when you suck the owner it take for algebra deodorant eeny making a beauty before drink till gay to raise money take a hand meal I think I thought using manual husband in this [ __ ] yeah you know damn well everybody looked like somebody you'd wait through who look mixing I see how that could be a bro were you girly laughing and [ __ ] I don't think that's your girl with me she laughing like her other [ __ ] sitting two rows behind this house she laugh [Applause] brothers your white girl does ooh you better say something cuz if the police come see with you how long you been [Music] yeah cuz you know you can't go over their name I got them hold on kill sit now wait a minute now hold on not that we're prejudice intent but meatballs in there these are no lady we don't want to scare her now lack mixing it up now you well more than welcome to get you some food but don't don't go in [Applause] whatever you can get man man your vets baby on the way you chop it but when you did that you did all of that you that's it like a six thing is bad for a rug they won't you be waving your feet up them you know the little part that go in the back of the toilet me when it looks liek that she came in a five please sent me I want to see your bedroom I bet you being the bathroom mansion like a [ __ ] [ __ ] and the toilet jelly [Applause] hey don't you love when your lady get dressed to start talking [ __ ] to people who ain't even now so to shake your dress should come and present her outfit [ __ ] man what are they mad at your outfit you mean to tell me it's a business who get angry when you put all your clothes on oh this [ __ ] has completed another outfit this [ __ ] ain't working we gonna have to put hands on this home ladies please keep doing it that [ __ ] is so entertaining because we know do I know now a lot of fellas might not know this but all the women are in an imaginary [ __ ] and like if you heard [ __ ] you posed to make her think she winning women look they don't want you the lights on but they do want you to light Zoo on don't like you posed to have some good [ __ ] and sleep out your lady here it's hang you walk back damn girl that ants getting fat gonna be going back here before I get you pregnant they want you to hype them up like every time y'all get ready go so well start tripping on an outfit they look at [ __ ] uh put that head cook take that [ __ ] off top some shuttle soon girl he is really mad like this [ __ ] crazy about to stop [ __ ] with him I'm gonna call you back at that change y'all like this that crazy bro - love - love everything she put on I put them titties up crazy my titties not even out that's a favorite excuse one to ten - ten it the whole city out yo favorite part is right above her lover boy [Applause] [ __ ] lookin out of [ __ ] hook girl got a little titties man can't even laugh my girl well whatever the [ __ ] she won't to them look [ __ ] won't slip out they don't go nowhere they right they're like two pepperonis what's up Oh cheap and [ __ ] who ain't bad note T get over there trying to watch this show on FaceTime oh that's your mama I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry meal I'm sorry he'll let me talk to him what's up girl how you doing did you know your daughter in here what a tail is out look everybody knows - yeah up titties out what's your name it let your mum pretties got that nice skins home look like a Hawaiian sweet road yeah yeah look like she [ __ ] [ __ ] at you it makes a good turkey neck your mom only 30 friends [ __ ] me so what's up beat down you remember with Cash Money Records took over for the night man and we sit that bit like this I want your back that ass up bank that you remember that [ __ ] Cash Money is my arm it ready at 1/8 we was in that in high school now look at your key it look at your lure paper girl we problems therefore paired together zone all right good ok put it back on I'm a kid she good do you and your brother that's a Chicago Nene since she left me [ __ ] you nasty and make [ __ ] the [ __ ] anything'll oh she [ __ ] wonderful see what she talked about now me everything you got there no good in homeboy in the crew [ __ ] get late at night you with your man lady didn't make a walk let's say she was she talking about nothing [ __ ] we live together the [ __ ] is wrong with you burn you drunk money [Applause] see if she wanna [ __ ] something she do me leave my woman that's the part about the relationship they don't tell you about great you have to feel security go ahead you gotta be like a goalie you gotta block all them dicks from your lady so a man women don't understand how crazy we really are you think you think you gotta have sex with a negative cheeto oh hell no let a [ __ ] find out you out here telling [ __ ] thank you man and biggest shoot you broke my chunk up on some [ __ ] laughs Manny [ __ ] I hear saying thank you have a nice day what did he have a nice day and [ __ ] where what you trippin on my [ __ ] she's saying thank you to another [ __ ] Brooke see this [ __ ] crazy I thought would that mean you heard what he said she don't desert at me that [ __ ] heckling out compliments keep going Lowe's we're Chicago one [ __ ] the finest room the plan is when to walk around this [ __ ] with $7 leggings on it's something I can tell you about your foe here you a good woman all good women got their foe here right [Applause] yes right it'd be like right Hill that hole look like she could just go tell me what you're thinking yeah all [ __ ] women we regular fast okay everybody everybody but this [ __ ] is trying his best to get his comment to me and he's running out of voice raspy voice [ __ ] what did you say what say what no is that what he's saying II said Detroit I'm not from there he don't know that I'm busy or he just wanted me to know he's from Mesa oh oh you y'all wanna shout out for me everybody what he said it damn it ain't even a lot of [ __ ] roomies he that's why he needed a Chanel he feels underrepresented I feel you my brother but don't never think the Eastside not in this fish but the west side in is this suit see before I even say in the other side it's more than still they want the south side in this [ __ ] oh my god oh my oh my oh my god y'all see I put with the south side cuz my auntie Marty live on the south side she old gang banger I'd be scared to go over a house later time I pull up she meet me in the yard it's always some [ __ ] across the street hunts y'all trust him [ __ ] she lifts my dress up he'll I wish don't [ __ ] [ __ ] would try my nephew that's all here Thank You Straight But straighten their head up my [ __ ] don't walk around Mississippi David girl you better stop [ __ ] plan let me tell up let me tell them why it's so important that Mississippi in this [ __ ] whoever boot Mississippi I hope you go outside and your car don't stop you should never pull me you don't know how rough [ __ ] in Mississippi guy ain't [ __ ] down there but tree fat people old people and little [ __ ] with pink hair everywhere I thought what water mississippi you from the Bass Pro Shop in a polo outlet I know see she live right behind it small world I know exactly Meilin stop yelling at me you really should stop I might [ __ ] with you because we are really arguing then she turn me on like when you kept going my big jump like he was gonna punch his little brother he played you like me you ever had you dig like were you at a fault water said a [ __ ] I can argue it in public I like that type of [ __ ] that's good plus the energy okay let's move on but being again I'm high and I really don't know how long I've been up here it feels like an hour but I feel like it's been some minutes we got to get the show started this was just our introduction show some love to my [ __ ] on the introduction hello before they even come out here I gotta let you know that this is the 85 South Shore and I know y'all been seeing us pop up all over the place breakfast club dish that in the other Wilin out not to be too specific you but whatever we're gonna [ __ ] around and wing ghetto plant moon good titanium yes that's why we're able to come in such a volatile area let them tell it and bring [ __ ] from the east side in the west side in the south sad even some of them successful [ __ ] came who live on the outskirts shutouts all my [ __ ] from Indiana and this [ __ ] y'all thought I wasn't gonna shout y'all out everything in Chicago a drought in India to give their cheap games [ __ ] you talking about now I ain't no [ __ ] business I really be in Chicago Seattle it ain't but 11 black people who live in Seattle it's ten now that you hear are you from you from the Nansen Annie that explains that best made out of polar bear [ __ ] he'll pull the bad [ __ ] hair polar bear [ __ ] hair polar bear put there pull the help was there a that polar bear [ __ ] hair coat made out of them on the bad [ __ ] house Cincinnati up in here pull away that put those now I say a polar bear what the hell that's a polar bear pulls the hair when she walked in the snow she was like hold on whoa I gotta do my best about to kill these [ __ ] so I need that best yeah the outfit I won't spoil it matter of fact don't give me that 3-piece set for the bathroom toilet [ __ ] pull the bat full of and full of male puts it down Oh Chico feed pull it back for the bullet BAM put the hell oh oh what'd you say I said is coming for the bat put the hair up in hell hey one time for the same on toilet in the pond the fan put the hair up in here yeah hey if you got put the hair what you call that plugs in here or just I want to call that [ __ ] hair hey I want to call that touch the hair one time what you call that puts in here if it's uh let me tell DC cuz he would him I made its color than a polar bear yeah over here over here Reed I call it in a polar bear over there [Music] hey hey hey hey oh oh oh oh pull up and put the hair up in there right now we don't pull the bell put the hair right we don't say that ladies is your car's old they don't care they walking around with this puss in here yeah with the hair be the best she got a white put the hair best one time get it in I'm a [ __ ] bunch of my best friend I don't care nothin about no [ __ ] here [Music] [Applause] that's what you get when you [Music] right now [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] okay yeah yeah I don't know [Music] now make some noise for the [ __ ] [Applause] time sweet okay now [Music] Chico never afterwards an auto tone [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music] Saeko you're not signed osing rhabdo [ __ ] [ __ ] with the bus you called the photo war is a robust these holdups he falls you sound like nothing like missing [ __ ] your [ __ ] future and make a change stop was real father now Oh [Music] [Music] [Music] [Applause] [Music] what you wanted [Music] [Applause] [Music] I'd like to talk to all that experience and welcome back by the five sounds fun [Applause] we y'all [ __ ] sound like this new spring to early summer y'all play like this bridge on may be like no places down by Jocasta hoorah weed again from the webpage the positive law is an i / this shake is amazing TC plays fast pardon Lopes at a floral in a place where did you get it okay all right all right y'all ready yeah okay yeah what's Yugi [Music] well you lately in real life I don't want you to know that real life [Applause] rock on water life y'all ready to be scared [Applause] crack down gum be looking at oh my you [Laughter] live from the big now that's you know there we go ladies and gentlemen live from the theater it is don't [ __ ] with fly I'm by to you that's how I out it's stupid I [ __ ] around with that new anything I only got one badly before yesterday why y'all support the movement I was anyway sir what you ain't make it did you did you buy oh you got that you he got a bigger shirt on up under the t-shirt cuz that one his size when I can put the picture it on a rolled it up like he got his gun on him Chico is you got a gun oh oh no no [ __ ] we about not knew he was different one his shoot don't look like [Music] oh yeah so you gonna disrespect my household I mean she ain't here my [ __ ] y'all fault which shows I had got the face time early where she wait you a bomb [ __ ] I'm talking about [Applause] why do I smell bah-bah-bah FaceTime Oh [Music] [Applause] [Music] so that's what we doing your own face well the biggest step that's what you're doing right in front of me gonna disrespect me is gonna be on face and what other [ __ ] Wow Wow young meter how you going crazy [Applause] that's the thing range where you going I want you to stay right there boy how long jump in the [ __ ] y'all so disrespectful where you going young man I want you to stay right there do you think you gonna [ __ ] the [ __ ] out of Cougars they put the made out of cast down they just open it up get as much as you want yeah make that sound from the joint come on young man [Applause] no cougar ride you know once you ride you might will go to sleep that means he's not getting up and B look at you like she ain't got to get up don't fly she ain't gotta get up cuz everything they need to be done already done you got your clothes I should've made you a sandwich you gotta split four ways cut the corners off now you got to lay that big - you gonna go to sleep go down there watch ESPN I already got the TV turned on for you young boy my son bought me that flatscreen you can watch it he don't never come over here he just bought it cuz you know what it is wait you cannot get the ass off you you like it some young just some cool business does not hey I'm saying I say one of the greatest Cougars the other day we was in LA I seen Lisa Ray oh my god I know make it gotta go change the drawers name is Ray and all she do is he she only wear white she only wear white you know how good your [ __ ] be gotta be for you to only wear white for the rest of you like you gotta justify that we did my [ __ ] Eduardo yeah she white Alton yes yeah yeah why you ain't gonna hear without no white oh but she could be considered a cool bird or something what we got a dress a peasant wake up when you're weird we got address this issue as a community for us [ __ ] are you being born what the [ __ ] is you doing I said her [ __ ] wake up when he won't sue [ __ ] I'm sleep what is wrong with you man walking like granddad [Applause] it's a safari wake up listen man happy oh my god no he looked like a brook transform to transform at the bump up the switch broke on his back Frenship do network money it wasn't be sleep hey hey hey be having a cottonmouth we don't undergo some [ __ ] just can't go ahead open me up God boy [ __ ] a bit brush the nut you got to put some Colgate on that [ __ ] this how you play with the [ __ ] Chicago you understand me the Windy City you know what [ __ ] pimps in the hoes got big titties just and then it might have went over your head like a feeling Kemp but that's when you beat anyway you understand that look I'm not talking fancy listening look you understand that cuz progress is a slow process can't you dig what I'm digging understand it ain't never about you but what you thought it was all about them and my friends now listen put that in your pipe and smoke it understand that this world ain't got [ __ ] to do with you it's bigger than you look brother now if you want to be somebody you got to get up earth if you don't want to be nobody keep doing what you've been doing you see how that [ __ ] work see we eat these wings hey man when you go on the road man you got to make sure you got your nutrition cave right Tracy game right make issue a personal chef Dan you gonna have to put them with your nutritionist you understand put your meal plan together you dig then you're gonna have with your dad with another put that with a supplement green juices plus your vitamins the herbs that you take Plus you can only smoke organic marijuana then you gotta [Music] [Applause] [Music] back to the three different voices yes hello you need a rich [ __ ] quick bill they just hold on girl you need a rich [ __ ] put the dig in you were hello [ __ ] you won't [ __ ] the [ __ ] this own way to be really rich I will you know I'm [ __ ] uniques but yeah auntie is only your name what many French said if you take one of my [ __ ] then I'm [ __ ] system eighties grandmas and cousins Mama's baby baby mamas knowledge [Applause] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] boy you for the game that's not even fair I was up there once in the show

Channel: The 85 South Comedy Show

Views: 3,464,248

Rating: 4.8674717 out of 5

Keywords: dcyoungfly, karlousmiller, comedy, mtv2, wildnout, podcast, chicobean, kevinhart, the 85 south show chicago, chicago stand up comedy, karlous miller chico bean, karlous miller songs, songs, dc young fly roast, chico bean, chico bean songs, stand up comedy, dc young fly stand up comedy 2018, 85 south show songs, 85 south chicago, funny, black comedy

Id: mU-8sCYSdtA

Length: 77min 3sec (4623 seconds)

Published: Fri Nov 23 2018