The Dallas Comedy Special ft. Deion Sanders

keep it 100 and spontaneous baby stuff they do comedy going on here tonight for y'all make sure you go on YouTube subscribe to their defy self show going on social media Instagram Twitter Facebook make sure you fun with 85 I'll show you guys are witnessing greatness here tonight you are witnessing [Music] Oh Washington DC on this stage at at night Dallas we got and you see the basketball squares you see them at the movies how high - he's all the way from Dallas we got [Applause] [Music] he is the creator of the black man don't cheat you see them on MTV ballin out he is the coldest game right now ladies you been daddy almost Miller is in the building all right everybody get the show started the film is damaged or making some noise right now okay Hey homeless figures in the buildin they you ain't got nowhere to go you ain't got nowhere to go [Music] [Music] Oh [Music] hey everybody what's that bad all your specs [Applause] wait what Cersei is some good [ __ ] under this fookin it's showy it's shooting noise on the power see how hard it is FUBU yeah I don't know what is you got some big rights that need to be a song but no to start loose loose loose are loose and we watch it caprices he eat the Lunchables no bigger what is you doing man I should kill listening drinking all the juices man you know that [ __ ] hallway in the kitchen and all the snacks man that's where they need to slip it oh I say it worse you're doing do you neither be afraid oh [ __ ] this you doing eating all the defecate oh you know I'm trying to shake her oh you know I thought the priests were kylos what'd you say tell them I'm that [ __ ] my eye is the fan laughter if I better hit the club in the no man she'll kill me Hey know that help us Marcy wheeled me and then as I fall with the years [Music] Oh [Music] [Music] [Music] okay [Music] and all the snacks and drinking all of the baby if I turn it low tarnish it low who ever work in a nice turn the lights down a little bit this a real pep said whoever worker the life now we need to crowd inaudible Pisa [Music] though that [ __ ] fly well you gotta be killed with you one that reason comes one not the least run loose you better stop shout-out to all the women they're so big - you're weird come on baby something tell you guys more than your nose run it looked like she got a cold but she don't she just give it me that throat [ __ ] some I think so good I see like what happens in yeah that's it that's all me baby pathetic this girl gave me some hair so good I saw her with a boyfriend and I would like nice to see y'all Lisi spoke out this would have been staring at a [ __ ] [Music] he and all your snacks and drinking are yoga breezing ensuite DVD [Music] [Music] [Music] but to sing a tepee enroll his name put it in the bank jump off the roof write his name or no orange juice let's [ __ ] is wrong when my daddy home for prison he don't kill y'all with my daddy Oh [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] we can turn this [Music] late I know they're loosely do their own slave are you specs we a Dallas oh you hit the snake [Music] Oh No I didn't think of it [Music] you got drinking our local brews up in here layer it layer they are we say you have a seat UI we gonna be really got a lighter [Music] damn [ __ ] got the crackhead light up yeah [ __ ] gotta crack here I got the clap here Nega guys the crack here later give all right don't take a break if the water [Applause] [Applause] solution to take it back there with the cowboy hat on gonna take my awards to the Old Town Road I said you're sitting in the back with the cowboy hat yo you should bought the Hat you show you there for some man you got bad tickets but you're still here here and I wanna say hey howdy howdy ain't nobody tell you nothin [Applause] [Applause] [Music] so about to be a cowboy we're down the sill about to be your cowboy good Paola so about to be a cowboy word Bala so I'm about to be a cowboy we're down the so I wanna let every lady know I'm looking for somebody who can ride a bucking bronco yeah I got a whole lot of beat if you're a freak then come and get a treat hold on I got to put my trailer back on the ground that's okay she got kids [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] and you know we do the cowboy rock everybody sitting way up top up top that's good that way you'll sit so they can roll their weight and they don't give no [ __ ] [Music] [Music] we just get no-touch it buster don't you remember what happened last time and he's still alive he's dead he's there buster he says hey throw it away he's gone he is gone he's gone get your dumb ass up boy from oh man okay we took that boys number two tits on a bull we have to save a lot now even though we gotta save in line they step on him like easy routes numb guys that a neurotic hippie still breathing then he still see you I'm trying to tell you can we then I stepped on your head looks to me little brother that sumbitch is big and I'm sorry to tell you he ain't coming back your life here he's a killer in here really sad but hey that's just life turn that [ __ ] off gotta go that's a good one we keepin that 100 songs off their same whoopee come on yellow everybody [Music] we real stupid is when you learn now that you've got fancy eerie style y'all think we scoop it right now no we bout to get real stupid far to the side like Mexico we're we are in Dallas Texas mine we are in the town a little more the stars man we're Dallas y'all like this picture right y'all sibling like it's just legal make sure y'all support my man see ray art he from Dallas he drew this man he did this of us y'all been showing us much love bro a week we got to show y'all we sold this show out two months ago right yeah I love us man and we know we're in Dallas bruh this is the homeowner this is a lot of Dallas Cowboys cowboy [Applause] we're Dallas this the home but it stars man is the home of the stars and we appreciate the stars per week we got to do something special for Dallas masses we in Dallas so we're okay Tommy so we under she we got a do so with matter of fact yeah I know [Applause] but that man broke legs I don't know what to driving down ba-bam let's drive it there prayed must beat Hey must be the coochie there's gravity the noise for the most legendary football player there we'll play the guy in Alberta the beer hey hey hey first of all this is my dream this is straight up this is my dream I've always wanted to do like 5 minutes of straight wrong stand up what y'all don't understand y'all allow me you think no no not now go this is my dream well let me tell let me tell them something bout y'all that they don't know first of all these kids ran real talk they something the realest in the business you really see the business I would be up if they were real secondly they are real true comedians they got love passion experience hope I love them I mean yup this they rehearsed this crazy stuff they're doing this stuff they doing they ain't rehearse nothing we just gotta finish the been chopping it up y'all came by here turn to stay you got man listen douche you sold out shows to solo show this is dr so this is primetime here right now they ever play football to score a touchdown and did duties all shipping [Music] the [ __ ] prime time thinking you don't have to be scoring a touchdown to do that you'll be getting [ __ ] dude that was going on Thursday and I still didn't gave me that [ __ ] go with everything bro this is the most legendary man did you watching you prime time back in the day when I used to kick the ball or used to be down there [ __ ] used to hack like neighbors gonna be able to tackle you you think and they proud time catch the ball Oh Chico Chico dan aykroyd so his footwork was bad what what [ __ ] you know I can't do it like you I was in Charlotte but I was in the band when I did my how you do your [Applause] [Music] I want to do that for you pressures Oh cover you don't do it hi I got three lawsuits going on right now you don't go into lawsuits yeah this dude is there is part of the reason why I got so many Super Bowls and Dallas man you know one time I thought it don't matter making you help them with all you brought down what about when you play for us no pride hey y'all my heart come on yo y'all chose me they chose me we know you I tell you fondled you inside champion I tell you she will talk you is that know why we win what where's the men city too much it was a city to transplant it comes out I answer to you or get you every time oh yeah uncle oh boy DC hit out of oh wait let me tell you somebody girl and I'm gonna tell y'all somebody curve um y'all hold on it is the girl look wet but it was dry damn that's why he brought how you make a Chico Chico did feel proud time now you do know that don't you baby you curl the win is a win but the dragna and smoke my way over here they think they see I believe in a minute so what you saying oh yeah broaching the crackhead like the letters yes I must respect you got into black community [ __ ] they put the weed up maybe they go do you put the weed I think like we runnin out distress about the road right step to the back one time DZ we mean about that turn my back though prime you know there as with prime don't need that type of attention you hit that from a long time but they don't ask me in in the morning does prime time and courage weed smoking let's talk about you want to say thank you Jesus for allowing crime to come and bless the stage we know that you have a connection with the Lord everyone's a thank you for giving us the connection from him we're all connecting with God so much so much now ladies the new lady members to sit in the front row leave the name while we have everyone's attention we still have not found the church's iPad it was black it was away we know Dante Diaz had it last there baby also we want to say to anybody that's bringing any food to the potluck make sure you use clean dishes this story true story to read your wife told me this before he pays all right true story true story the pastor announced at the church one of the mothers had died the mother last name was [ __ ] [ __ ] I'm not lying so the pastor gets up in front of the church and he said him he was giving new I'd like to say I think I'd like all of you to know that [ __ ] go when I look back over all the work she's gone I can't help but think about that [ __ ] was a good one [Music] whenever we needed something who did we go oh that mother well all the little [ __ ] come up in the population oh you know [ __ ] come up because what I need to do I need to appoint the next mother come out use a good [ __ ] use a good [ __ ] use a great fun but you are the next mother [ __ ] true story true story that was a good joke there was laser [Music] like a weekend ago [Music] [Music] hold up I got light here hello while we have everyone in the gibbet mood now we're gonna take up the collection everyone seems to be yes in a giving spirit we're gonna start in the back and we're gonna pass the collection plate down to the front that was a good novel ago will you take more than money ladies if you want to put a titty in the plate we'll take that for the city in the plate give because God has given to you we want to thank everyone for coming out to the 85 South Shore Baptist Church tonight you could have been anywhere in the world but you chose to be here with us we are in Dallas so I must say God bless Oak Cliff Lee not only are we alive word for word [Music] you ain't Sinkin if there's ever a trembling the place [Music] see you playing hit your spirits it's got to be a good spirit [Music] [Music] [Music] well you don't spank and is ready to be in your [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] I need to in the name of the Lord just I don't want to kid about it [Music] cuz I got to 2220 garden [Music] [Applause] [Music] I didn't feel good hey gotcha [Music] [Applause] don't do great guy sounds like you need a blessing me the place sounds like what you gonna do with it that's the part I want the crowd the same feels coming up I don't give a [ __ ] you gotta change you got bills coming on high heels coming up I don't give a [ __ ] Bill's coming up I don't give a [ __ ] Bill's coming up I don't give a [ __ ] Bill's coming up [Music] bills coming up I don't give a [ __ ] Bill's coming up I don't give a [ __ ] Leo's coming I don't give a [ __ ] my god I don't give a [ __ ] my god I don't give a [ __ ] hey god I don't feel [ __ ] hey I don't give a [ __ ] [Music] [Music] - man over here sleep I think I'm gonna say what - oh [ __ ] you ready you ready I could break y'all sleeping y'all got to be ten that knowing dig alarms is burning a plan a plan hey y'all make some noise for the mofo who drew this baby Radisson see ray she feels right beautiful Mario salute there they go my man with the good [ __ ] check up boys shirt stuntin on these hole you came here dressed like the finish line right when they got stupid andrea.adrian they got chicken fries from Burger King jury I think I got flats those are plants brain juries they will crazy like nodding oh he can't take a battery life [ __ ] but you know what I'm still thinking about what even though you see well we'd be doing college you got some out of here with a deep throat whoa what just me what you made a deep girl like at Mizzou she talked about she bout to fall over the balcony she's so stupid [ __ ] with that data like a see who like me [Applause] right like this hey baby in the back was up boom how you doing look at how two people understand distinction y'all so stupid hey I don't know where they both standing tickets are just an - ticket yeah yeah yeah then they telling them where to put you put your feet right here sir all right cool then they got no wrote it to y'all ass oh no chill they just end up yep hey ain't gonna have two big goddamn family reunion chairs in here somebody need right now that's why that's 40 Lightfoot dad bro nobody gonna put this have to sit down there so long they plans to get hard in the poem yeah yeah they so close there's so many people on the far right now you know the [ __ ] that's uncomfortable to flag they keep going like this if somebody coughed I mean they put it excuse me excuse me somebody ain't newbie got a [ __ ] they sitting on the edge of this thing my man right there he hold it checkable he going to take sugar why you keep the other now my name what's up she need a rat what's your need you hold on I got you I got you transmitted she go I eat your [ __ ] [ __ ] oh what'd you say what's up or would you want Butchie could be can't hear you what you say what you are talking to Carlos but will you be yelling so Carlos this boss Walker demand in his [ __ ] I want to talk to Carlos ma'am you were in the balcony okay we'll try to help you ladies we trying to help you I know I know I know you can't hear me but [ __ ] that make the other [ __ ] walk come on no no cool hey I can't walk over there because [ __ ] then is gonna look like I need her no ain't my [ __ ] is a player that's a boat I was trying to help you run into and lay down a nice witness [ __ ] you know what I look like she running over there I don't know her might tell you a CL running out to do oh yeah I'm a flirt around hurt don't count this [ __ ] right did I say I'm gonna eat her coochie dancer get girl got a tofu no you won't yeah that's all for she said yeah you better sit your ass down for somebody eat your coochie mam learn about her walk coochie coochie smell like autozone nobody want that big ass coochie excuse me we're gonna find directions that ma'am get in the zone otto's oh I need a cup no no watch the cheesiest [ __ ] else only it must be true he was indeed a transmission you need to get that [ __ ] flush come on what I'm gonna do that is it get in the zone autozone 32 ultimate sound like a pirate shut up daughter couples then sit here that made all the couples where the couples ed s she sounds so bad oh yeah they were talking on the way in the car [ __ ] I told you I got good seats I don't believe you you lasted much you know fellas you get caught light of your girl one time knew you had to prove yourself for the rest of the relationship it don't matter what you say but I mean how was your day it was good no the [ __ ] wet like it was baby no wet like I see your face on the second row just one titties on a week we're right there TV for one week you know see right resume oh yes oh yes what our trophy ladies and gentlemen in Dallas we want to welcome you we have a lot of contestants but we not crowned a winner they trying to come all the way from somewhere in Dallas Texas make a royal Grove what is your name ma'am make some noise for the titty of the week winner mrs. Terry you know charities up yeah you got a [Music] [Music] [Laughter] [Applause] joke - somebody put that [ __ ] on an old-ass meme it's gonna look better and they watch most [ __ ] watch it's not working it right now handsome what's have anything black hold up bro - 50 - yeah I don't know watched it online at air towns just stupid a you know what okay it's food with a little hand me see but if a little hand in between the fortified info it that's one I think that 23 okay it may be you're tired yeah we see yeah yeah you mix thought and I heard from holding your big hands here they oughta be here [ __ ] quietly [ __ ] you man you don't know I struck me game here look at Nick can you swap so u s-- washi tape what does look like the key [ __ ] what have you get to him and then she looking like this this looked like the clip off power [ __ ] this boy we bout to got there up top go see the Players Club [ __ ] that see like dollar be about to come are this bouquet got power TV on in the house where you can watch it when you get back to now is that a [ __ ] said you only got a bill no nothing about it but I know everything the bad and if you have my money um I think I burn around with the true right dollar bill middle cut report nothing nothing nothing until Debbie get her [ __ ] ass upstairs to that's a really open light to like a diver what cute it pulls you working there pale is full of the city's be had to rights issues what you all like [ __ ] so ain't nobody not the most [ __ ] up scene in that movie I just came to dance for y'all hey that [ __ ] idea is the hood city every that [ __ ] kill Cain and ministers society that [ __ ] the initiative Players Club that [ __ ] got everybody shot on tales from the hood hey we're lending a rare dr. house oh oh they're polite [ __ ] run out huh hey come on hell yeah hell yeah that's how that new active that's not that [ __ ] walked up he was like hey I'm Holly cousin he said when we supposed to fight over a [ __ ] hey I think you need watching you calling a [ __ ] partner oh thank you know me homie I don't like the way you've been treating my cousin what's up that [ __ ] came out I said king house I can't take this anymore Kane you have to leave my home a kids he's the City Mall Kane I've done all that I can do for you you must leave Kane was like so y'all want me to go come into the house that's a classic movie right there boy will you tatted up Kate wait I cannot take any more come in the house you have to leave I want you out of my house King well you better quit [ __ ] with them all the way I learned something [ __ ] while holding breath I don't know what the connection is but if something connected to the throne in the [ __ ] oh he'll be [ __ ] the holder woman and she be like oh why she gotta clear her note when you put the digging Oh young man Oh hey whoa cougar I felt hot too good she tricked me she tricked me I would tell her as she was [ __ ] with the right Cooper she hit you with some [ __ ] [ __ ] your whole night up hold up wait a minute you [ __ ] me too hard let me go get my life alert there's the manhood movies man that's dead it built who we are in him is like I said tails I made [ __ ] see details from the hood that [ __ ] was scariest [ __ ] when you was little wondering especially that lore add the one with the Lord dolls the blue [ __ ] let's go walk he said come home I steal your you love Nicholas I was like Nicholas let's [ __ ] though let me smack that [ __ ] wowthat's muhfuckas it oh [ __ ] is that man give us the [ __ ] oh you gonna get the [ __ ] come on I got the [ __ ] right over here this no funeral home and it ain't to terrordome neither welcome to ya [ __ ] like turn this [ __ ] off I can't go to sleep now mommy the function was scary as [ __ ] with your [ __ ] ain't no worse than x-files though scariest Hood movie ever Candyman I bet one betters [ __ ] in here right now that a shooter and killers [ __ ] quick dinner [ __ ] but I bet you won't go in the bathroom turn the light off and say Candyman five times into Murr yes you will no you won't you a leader bad so quick arrow your being able I bet you I bet I will no you won't be I will no you won't bet I will no you won't me buddy buddy hey you know I came to me and was so scared why he's just a regular [ __ ] who lived in the project that everybody got mad at him they killed him they could beat any black man yep honey just coming he needs it cause it yeah yeah yeah he didn't kill you he did he still did some [ __ ] that was scary enough to scare the [ __ ] honey [ __ ] just show up in the middle holding a white baby that's scary is funny or die's facing bees and [ __ ] like who is that you ain't never realized this that Candyman and the dude that put his finger on uncle Charles forehead in the Bone Thugs video I had the same leather jacket on that long look at Sean things like damn he sure did they will yeah meet me at the crossroads I was scared of that [ __ ] too I'm still scared of that [ __ ] the boy could you imagine if you were you so when you look and see that [ __ ] be like Oh [ __ ] nothing negative took off for Charles y'all oh no run that [ __ ] Keller it kind of hurt to hear you talk about it cuz even though we didn't know uncle Charles I'm pretty sure every black person in this [ __ ] building right now we miss our uncle Charlie yeah man is my uncle's hog yeah please it y'all I'll be wrong dog and I was going in the minimo nobody will move is wrong look I'm mad got to stay up here act like I know what the [ __ ] happened to Uncle he was wrong [Music] the argument was all right it makes sense we had that music in the 90s boy didn't change like ladies y'all real R&B music in the night [ __ ] used to sing for the [ __ ] now it's not like that no more now [ __ ] suck my dick little [ __ ] won't you look at hazy how go now play with the pleasure house oh you know what's up with me [ __ ] never let me pull up my truck you the [ __ ] ho ho ho we got a do from for the flame look at real time bigger face Joe oh my God look at the word [Music] [Music] [Music] and I don't I say it because she's man that Pepsi man president Longley a filthy thing one of the greatest ever oh please all Benziger so a bigger personal murder one of the coldest versus elbow writ man I'm still PFC Beach so what the [ __ ] is up putting powder on the streets cause I got big [ __ ] good just got back from captain [Music] guys are passed on for food because you know I just made two they were both dirty from me so I fronted 42 yeah he gonna promise a hundred times sixty two twenty phone eight is where I get so [ __ ] [ __ ] what you do I told you cocaine numbers you would think I was lying job [ __ ] 22 and talking fun every time hey daddy made a thing coming forward beers beers hold to a pop it's where I entertain free speech I didn't get me 50 houses out of birth [ __ ] tighten up no stop gozaburo selling [ __ ] up my throat before you kick it with me legit put me down with purple chronic in that hurt me [ __ ] Ross dude II don't what's old man I wish I could say I got the ha'la'tha because we got money to make jeez man like ball I got a step B G man let's make us say you want to show you get 9 grand I ran for [ __ ] until my money that's where I stay [ __ ] every goddamn day I'm golden hoses oh my [ __ ] job from all that I show it especially the food they take a salad take like my [ __ ] don't know we're kicking with the trier thing Oh your best night trip if you keep on popping [ __ ] [Music] every day - validated timer you want to be eating fixes for real get that [ __ ] out this is the time - she look like she she right you work your wheels fog [Music] [Music] Dallas may much love to all the ladies that got all birth control is ready to get pregnant you ready to get cricket this blues wait shut out all the ladies in the crowd they can ride dick for longer than a minute and 30 seconds appreciate you some of y'all Eli y'all soon as you get down there you be crying crying talk about my pants is burning cool [ __ ] oh Lord hold my thighs are burning oh Lisa water get your lazy ass up who else you saw in a neighbor who else ain't you to shout out tonight we're all Hispanic people that with a Hispanic people left it was on their liver salute all my [ __ ] they went to jail before but I ain't never going back that [ __ ] said yeah hey hey snakes a trick Oh [Applause] Oh [Music] Piku [Applause] [Music] Oh oh wait before we go bro we gotta get a piss additional [ __ ] manifested life back data like this [ __ ] back we gotta get this pistol right quick push a shelf and it's our last show sold out in this [ __ ] we coming back we got a door like this hold up y'all turn this way real quick hey we're Dallas right now this is the heavy fire south show where Dallas sure what it look like a Dallas baby [Music] [Music] [Music]

Channel: The 85 South Comedy Show

Views: 2,003,610

Rating: 4.868649 out of 5

Keywords: nigerian, comedy, dcyoungfly, karlousmiller, mtv2, wildnout, podcast, chicobean, kevinhart, Deion sanders, 85 south show dallas

Id: YbXrgqqh4Io

Length: 74min 10sec (4450 seconds)

Published: Fri Aug 30 2019