The Best of Don Rickles & Dave | Letterman

that part of the country i'm not too familiar  with i've been through there but i've never   worked there you you used to do college dates  and so forth i never went to college you went   to ball state that's right now how did you  know i wanted to because you're my whole life   anyway it's good to see you guys  i'm delighted you're making a lot   of money you're in a big theater  i don't think it's gonna last nice to see you you look terrific don why you  heard something bad no i didn't how's frank   doing is he he's great he's great i always tell  him he's great otherwise he could hurt the family i remember one day i said you don't look good  now i got an aunt walking around like this no   you know let me mention something here we're going   to do our show this television show  in los angeles in in may i think the   week of may 13th oh that's exciting i'm  going to drop my pants and fire a rocket anyway the the picture is going to be real  dynamite joe how big is your part in the   movie seriously well when you see it are you like  a coaster not like an extra are you like an extra   i'm not an extrovert do you have  lines in the movies no i don't have   lines no i don't have lunch i just  stand there and i wet my pants what's happened so they they really were then  they really must have been it's a talkie familiar   with your work yeah i know i understand that  norma desmond comes in at the end and faints   what the hell do you think we're doing  here i don't know it's a big movie   it's a big movie in your store and you're  starting to see me just come in and ask   if we need any more ice i came out here  with a good attitude now you're scamming just me we're having fun tonight uh don  it's a pleasure to see you again   and and the next your wife is so nice and  so reasonable and so down to earth and so   intelligent you know i get the feeling that to to  marry you she must have been tricked oh no [ __ ] was going so nicely turned on  man turned on me for no reason   no we're married 31 years she's a lovely  woman on the wedding night she just please you never saw her anyway uh it doesn't  make your kind of money then you and your uh   you jump right over that when i bring up  the money every time i've been on this   show every time i discuss what you make it's  like oh please i don't know what i'm doing   meanwhile you're in connecticut saying to  your girlfriend uh put it in the other truck hey folks for the money you're  paying this is a riot that's right murdoch now why are you yelling i'm right  here rupert murdoch rupert murdoch's   another millionaire he's in australia running  around going i think i can get to that tree hey folks i thought that was dynamite but i know you're not a emotional your  family you never you never hugged a guy   in other words if i'm a hugger stand  up for a second i don't hurt you   yeah no i wouldn't but you come over  here but you're not the kind of guy   see well let me just let me just say when  two jews meet on the highway they go i think i don't want him out here good to see you randy good to see you  telling people how bad your show's doing   but the show i guarantee if you're there really  for 2 000 bucks when they see me because i'm   not going to do it a regular show and have a  bottle of vodka drop my pants and fire a flag we're having the the big debate it's  going to be a george w bush and al w   gore and that night we're trying to you know  spice it up a little bit that night we'd like   you to come by and at some point during the  evening drop your pants and fire a rocket i said let's have dinner and dave goes no  place i mean that he goes up to connecticut   i understand you have a lovely young lady but  you stay under the bed and she goes yes he can did you watch your diet yeah sure like i have a  steak once in a while and you don't have to always   say isn't that right all of that you don't have  to be that that attentive you don't have to be don't give me that he gives me  that crap like he's interested i mean i'm 81 but this isn't gone yet look at this paul said 81 he looks it i  should i should talk though right yeah   yeah little [ __ ] with glasses will you hey no  no it's all right cause he means you with the   love you mean it with all the love right no i  don't no no no i'll be honest i never liked you   you worked with clark gable remember clock gable  yes sir oh boy bert lancaster yeah first movie   i ever did came on the on the in those days  it was united and it was submarine picture   they didn't go on location i talked to  him because i could go someplace with him fair enough now denzel when you're married 43 years  you guys i don't know anybody   out there but if you're married in 43 years wow you just don't hit the bones one  two three you know what i'm saying   and if you're jewish just circle a bed  and get an estimate there's a lot of wise   guys and then you know everybody was veto  boom boom charlie babarano you know yeah   but it was great because if you wanted a cup of  coffee today if you want coffee or eggs you got   to go boom four stamps three vice presidents two  secretaries right before you get anything in those   days doing hey give the kid whatever he wants  and then grab his daughter and twist the room   my luck a couple of those guys will be  alive and you'll see me up here like this   now are are any of those guys still  alive they're all dead that's good thank   god because it could be dangerous if you're  talking about there's no chance they're dead   are you sure if they're not  dead i got a problem wow ronald reagan was was great i mean i  kidded him when he was the governor   and i did the roads there's one guy who went yeah is he around you know that he's making pancakes   these are little i understand thank you thank  you just to keep me going because you're no help   i know anyway you were single in those  days right i was in heat yeah anyway   i can hardly wait till the show to be  over to get this going again yeah anyway you're laughing that joke's gonna cost me  i'm married 45 years and when i get back   to the hotel she's going to say let's  hear that thing about the leg again and this time make me laugh frank fix me up with this one girl oh i never got  margie on anyone she said don i got this girl for   you she's perfect and she was blonde kind of  cute glasses you know and a little space like   you a little space a little space in her front  teeth between her front teeth yeah and every time   and every time we made love she started a whistle i didn't know if i stooped or made tea now that i'm on the show again every time  i come back i'm i'm very inspired and   things have gone well for me and i owe a  lot to you for being so kind to me and my   my family and we have a big  home now with hunting dogs johnny went away and i thought carson was  all i thought it'd be the end for me and then   you came along with that booming personality   made it so nice yeah i love you well  i love you too i think the world heavy   here now don rickles dropping his pants and  firing a rocket here we go stand by get ready firing or rocking all right come on in boys here we go what is it right

Channel: Letterman

Views: 697,173

Keywords: letterman, david letterman, dave letterman, interview, letterman interview, letterman official, letterman late show, letterman late night, late night, stupid pet tricks, stupid human tricks, top ten, late show, top ten list

Id: BSpG8To0Zrg

Length: 10min 16sec (616 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 11 2022