Texting That Attracts vs. Repels

hi I'm coach Corey Wayne and this is my video coaching newsletter and the topic of today's newsletter is going to be texting the tracks women versus texting that repels women and ruins attraction I've got an email here from a guy who looks like you Rhett I think you've read my book once and he got himself online an online dating profile and then he had one gal that responded to him that he went out and actually went to lunch with her and I was like a month ago and I haven't even gone out and in the meantime he's discontinued his online dating account he's not talking to any other women which you know when that happens it's like how are you going to practice if you're not talking to anybody else and you only got this one girl who's really not paying you much attention that's what live guys do they get themselves into this trap of oh this one girl this is it this is the girl I'm going to be with and then they start you know acting like a zombie just like all the TV shows and movie programs that they watched it was like oh I've got to pursue this girl like a robot until she eventually throws in the towel and I make her mine and this is how you waste a lot of your time a lot of your life and end up being just very sexually frustrated having a bad case of blue balls and not progressing so you can get better with women he says hi Cory I'm hoping you can help me out with a girl that seems to have gone cold on me some background I'm recently divorced after nine years of marriage I met a girl online we email for a while she eventually gave me her number and then we exchanged texts for a few days I asked her to meet me and she readily accepted we ended up meeting for lunch that's a huge [ __ ] right there you don't take a chick that you're want to become your lover you don't meet her out for lunch that's something that a friend would do you want to meet her out for drinks in the evening all right like a happy hour or a wine and cheese bar or just someplace where you can have some appetizers and coffee or tea if you're not a you're not a drinker because if you want to be your lover than you do things that are lover would do and as your lover a man's job is simply create a fun-filled romantic opportunity for sex to happen so how the [ __ ] when you're planning a lunch in the middle of day is that an opportunity for sex to happen it's not it's basically a way of saying gee I'm really sorry that I like you so I'll take you to lunch first and hopefully I won't piss you off and then maybe your highness if you like me you'll let me take you to dinner and that's what a lot of guys do that's like their mentality they have this pleaser attitude or I gotta kiss a woman's ass and act like a total [ __ ] weak [ __ ] like it you know they like the all the effeminate men on all these ridiculous TV shows do and of course the women go bananas over them which is just absolutely absurd because that [ __ ] doesn't work in the real world he says she told me to call her to send something up and so here's he says that they went well and why we didn't make definite plans we talked about getting together again it's another mistake when you start talking about the next date when you're still on your first date that communicates that this [ __ ] doesn't happen to you very often it doesn't happen to very often that you actually go out with a woman and when a guy does that and he's trying to arrange the second date the reason most guys do it is they fear that you know I what if I can't get her on the phone it'd be better just to make a definite date here so I feel good about myself I get some certainty and all he's doing is communicating his neediness and his unworthiness to her so right off the get-go you're you're [ __ ] up like so it's two big big fuck-ups right there and that's after the first date and I talk about these things in my book and that tells me that you don't know the material very well because you're just making unnecessary mistakes she called him the next day and or she texted him the next day to say how great it was to meet and how much she enjoyed spending time with me well that's a good sign eventually we did but it was a good sign for then when that happened because a woman's interest and goes up and down based on her emotions and so when you're doing things right it goes up when your own things wrong it goes down eventually we did make plans to go to dinner which we had to cancel because she would she was sick at any rate I could see I did a few things wrong a plane probably came off is too accommodating and too needy I'd say again when you're fearful that things are going to work out or that you're not going to get a second date because you haven't dated enough or you don't date very often women could pick up on this they know guys that are successful with women other women and they know guys that aren't and if they start to get the hint or a perception that you're the only thing they got going on and it's been a long time since they've been out of date then she's going to think you know what this guy's not much of a catch because obviously if there aren't other women trying to win him then he's probably not that much you know why should I be trying to win him he said I really didn't want to be incentive by trying to get her to commit to a firm date when she was really sick I also let it become too much of a texting relationship you use the phone the texts the email for setting dates not having trying to have a relationship and a lot of guys get themselves in the habit of texting and calling women and emailing them in in instant messaging them all the time but yet these chicks never seem to find a time to go on a date every time you ask her out for dates she's always busy she's got other something else going on and he says not sure she's younger than me 34 verses 25 and she liked texting I know I am caught up in the one myth syndrome with her partially because of the divorce being fairly awful even though I was the one who ended it and partially because it has always been my tendency prior to being married I dumped my online membership and ignored the multiple other girls who had initiated emailing me on there after I met this girl that's another that's a huge [ __ ] mistake I mean think about this way you got this one girl you're trying to land and you're just learning this stuff and obviously you don't even know the material very well and so you got nobody else to practice on and so when you're not talking to this girl there's nobody else that you can practice on and make mistakes with it's going to help you get better and so this dramatically reduces the chances of not only having success with her but any other woman in general you basically taking yourself off the market now your whole personal life is on hold for this one girl that you went out and you had a nice friendly lunch with a month ago you got to [ __ ] pay attention that [ __ ] you just can't ignore those things like they're not happening partially because he says exalt now I do is I think about this girl only and that's you know that's a problem you get you get obsessed with a woman I think I still deal with confidence issues from when I was younger even though I have no trouble getting attractive girls to at least go out with me I think I still have lots of trouble advancing passes first stage of the relationship yeah your problem is you can't get a second date because you act so needy either prior to the first date or you act like a friend or her personal assistant or her Butler or her errand boy and when you act like that they'll love to have you as a male girlfriend or a friend but you'll never get any you know you won't have a relationship with them he says so here's some of the texts basically and he says so after the second cancel date he says he texts her again she says hey I'm pretty sick can I please take a rain check so he's asking her out again and she's saying no he's and she said he says hey I'm really sorry you're still feeling bad of course you can take a rain check I'm happy to get together with you and you're better and have some time off translation please call me I hope you like me your highness it's ass kissy behavior you know my what I would have said I mean the best way one is she says am really sick say hey no problem you know it's this is I wrote this down in my article and it's a great way to handle the comeback because you don't need to be texting back and forth she says you asked her for a date she says I'm sick and it doesn't sound like she offered any other day to go on and so the best thing that that you could say something like hey no problem you know what I'm sure you'd much rather go out and try to impress me when you don't have snot running down your face lol but hey I look know give me a text when you feel better so we can get together and have some fun again honey with a little smiley face it's just something simple and sweet like that and you're basically putting the bong her core and going about your life and letting her to see when you worry about where she is or how healthy she is or she's over a cold yet you're putting your life on hold for her and this way in plus because you're too scared to risk her not calling you back and that's what you have to do is you have to be willing to take that risk for girls to not call you back and then you realize well I guess I [ __ ] blew with her on the next one but instead you don't know that so you're just still sitting here in limbo and things aren't really going anywhere and she says thank you I'm really looking forward to seeing you again and then he says it's perfectly okay I just want you to feel better no need to try to eat dinner sick probably thinking why is this guy wanting to come to dinner when I have strep throat just kidding upon reading this again he says this seems like a tooth the stupid text on my part and you're basically apologizing to her for the fact that she's sick and can't go out with you and it just it's total weak and needy behavior you're just you're falling all over yourself to please her and to go out of your way to make her think that you're a nice guy and you're not a jerk just like they do in all the TV shows and the [ __ ] doesn't work in real life he says and I really look forward to seeing you again too I like getting to know you more and more this one may have been too much also he says and you're basically drooling all over her now at this point and you're acting dopey it's like you had one lunch day with her she hasn't earned this yet and then we texted again the next night about how she was doing and so obviously he checks up on her and so basically if you'd have responded like I had mentioned to say you know give me a call or text me when you're feeling better so we get to go have some more fun honey if you just said that you wouldn't be having to do anything and she'd be taking care of her cold or her illness and you could be out dating and practicing these skills with other women and actually getting [ __ ] better so when she finally does contact you a few days or a week or two later you're actually better than you were you're more confident you're more sure of yourself because you've been using this skill these skills because repetitions motor skill he says hey how are you just wanted to say hi and see how you're feeling been one how you been doing with the pneumonia was just hectic out in Phoenix and got back late yesterday and she says oh I figured I didn't want to bother you it's my first night back at work in other words what she's saying is I didn't want to bother when she says I didn't want to bother bother you in other words she was saying I really had no desire or intention to call you and that's basically what your communications you didn't give her any time obviously to get better or for her feelings to go up I'm fatigued but my trainee is handing most of my work how are you and he says yeah was wondering if you were back at work has your asthma been acting up being sick I'm doing okay glad to be back at home I was too damn hot out there pretty sure I was close to heatstroke the love is playful and fun it's not serious and you're basically acting like her doctor like you're checking up on her but what you're really doing is you're contacting your you just like [ __ ] waiting to spring an another date opportunity on her the instant you feel that she's better but what's what's happening is you're constantly texting her every day are you better yet are you better yet are you better yet that's basically what's going on and that's not helping your case dude it's making you look weak and needy he says that well that was last Thursday and she never responded to the last text and that should tell you something that should tell you exactly where her level of interest is in you and it's really low and so what you should do now at this point nothing at all you should wait for this cue I mean you've done enough you contacted this girl excessively so much you might have turned her off completely and so the only thing to do is walk away you need to reactivate your dating profile and I put some links on the article on my website that it'll take you to my online ultimate online dating profile a perfect way to model what your profile should look like it'll get two to three really super high called women that are exactly what you want to contact you on a monthly basis and plus you'll have lots of other women that you can interact with but the key is with online dating and like what you're finding out is it's a lot better for women to contact you then you try to contact women because when you settle emails you're going to send autumn and get very low response but you put a great profile on there that tells women what it is that you want and basically in a nice charming way if you this is you this you meet this criteria should be text and so they're chasing you from the get-go where is this way with you contacting them first you're chasing women that may or may not have that much interest in you and so it's a lot more work and that's what you're you're finding out with this particular girl and then the last thing he says I like her a lot but at this point I don't want to continue to come off as desperate if I've already done that so far you've definitely done that so far I thought about calling her and directly asking her out but not feeling her interest due to the lack of contact he's like see your spidey sense your intuition is seimei I've already done enough I should probably back off and you got to learn to listen to that voice and learn to trust that voice because there's wisdom in and it's telling you've already done enough just wait for her to contact you and she does make a definite date in the evening to get together someplace and then have two or three other places that are close by you can take your to after is like a wine and cheese bar or maybe a place to play pool or throw darts someplace art miniature golf or whatever someplace where you can go and interact with each other physically I have plenty of time to sit and talk face to face have a great day and then just like I talked about create a romantic opportunity for sex down you

Channel: Coach Corey Wayne

Views: 842,560

Rating: 4.8323236 out of 5

Keywords: Texting, That, Attracts, vs, Repels

Id: qH3VnuYcAN8

Length: 14min 54sec (894 seconds)

Published: Fri Apr 27 2012