Technoblade Spitting Facts for 18 Minutes Straight!

welcome guys so the skywars you're playing teemo because think of it this way imagine if every clueless skywars player was two clueless skywars players that's basically what team mode is in a nutshell and it's the most amazing thing ever you get twice as many people to kill you get twice as many coins now it's twice as hard to win but two times zero is zero you just hate you're just being countered by facts and logic you're like ew imagine using valid arguments every teacher ever imagine using valid arguments to refute my idiotic points that's what you're saying that's what you're saying go write a book no i don't want to be in a youtuber pays more books are actually a really good way why would i write books when i can just live stream minecraft smp and yell it small child and get 195 000 viewers it's just a large baby am i bitter that someone got the same amount of views that i do in six months and under a week by standing still dressed as a stone block overlaid with royalty free music from incompetech.com no i'm not bitter at all because that would be petty and i'm not a petty person at all i'm so petty oh my god you have no idea anyhow let's stab some nerds for coins cause i'm all right let's go 420 subs that is a milestone i've always wanted to achieve i always wanted to take my first youtube blunt and now i can and you know i'm going to do this again at 4 200 subs i'm going to do it again at 4 four hundred and twenty thousand subs and i'm gonna do it at four million two hundred thousand subs and i'm probably not gonna get to 40 million to be honest but i'm gonna get to that four million two hundred thousand and enjoy my last blunts don't smoke kids it's not fun but marijuana is to go weed some random nerd asks for an faq question how do you know when to block it and i mean for me it's basically just if there is an enemy block it you take half damage and the only downside is that people in the comment section tell you you're bad and they were gonna do that anyways because i am bad so it's a win-win they're all pretty much saying the same thing oh man when i started this youtube channel i never thought i'd get this far thank you guys so much this is just so unexpected we've got and i'm just sitting here like these guys are all lame i could beat them and that's how my channel started because i wanted to troll everyone but it wasn't it wasn't arrogance because i didn't think i was any good at youtube i knew on the other hand quite the contrary i knew i was garbage at youtube at the time even more garbage than i am now actually if you believe it or not because all youtubers when they start out of garbage that's just something i knew half of my motivation to be a big youtuber was the fact that everyone was like that's just not going to happen this doesn't no go do math homework i mean granted do your math homework anyways like half the fun it's like everyone going you're never going to get 100k subs then it's like here i am and i like oh you'll never get 10 million and i people probably question why i say 10 million instead of 1 million because 1 million is basic every youtuber says they're going for 1 million no 1 million is like the basic goal everyone's gotten 1 million subs by now i'm going for 10 million ah everyone said this computer is like very slow i tried to destroy it once tecno blade do you know that that might be why it's slow that could be the reason so a lot of people have been spamming my comment section oh my god technoblade why aren't you in united uhc and you see i actually was scheduled to be in the events but i had a mild case of surgery on that day which prevented me from being able to show up i mean i could have showed up but i was on like every type of anesthetic at the time i don't know how inspiring my commentary would have been and that's especially bad considering that would be split into what like you know three to five episodes or something depending on how instantaneously i die which i don't imagine i become a sudden pvp guide when i'm like on all the drugs ever i mean i i could i could barely tweet at the time this is the only thing i managed to tweet afterwards and i don't doesn't doesn't give me the impression of like utmost confidence but whatever i made a portal here and i was about to go in and wow those cows are loud wow okay i'm explaining over here i made a portal and i was about to go in and then i was like hey what if i just did this while live streaming and then made vast sums of money for doing the same thing that's a great idea so i decided to do that so that's what we're doing so yeah we do all the filming and then we're like all right someone's got to edit it i'm like i'll edit it because you know i i've edited a video before so you know this is the largest assignment of the year and it's worth a massive portion of our final grade so you know i do the only reasonable thing which is to wait until the absolute last second before starting the editing leave me alone okay don't expect me to make good life choices i'm technoblade it's not it's not what i'm good at but it's editing so you know i started it in about 1 30 and 1 30 in the morning the day the assignment's due i'm still at it in and suddenly sony vegas is like you know what psych and all of my video files corrupt i'm just sitting here like but why sony vegas and so i'm sitting here it's like two in the morning now i haven't found a solution i'm like ah i start the editing again so yeah i got a good i got a good two hours of sleep that day getting two hours of sleep did not help me pass the other two finals i had that day but i banished i managed that's the story of how sony vegas almost prevented me from graduating it's a stunning tale of how you just should never rely on an editing program ever oh my god techno i got two questions for you it's actually kind of like a double-sided question believe it or not really high level thinking here do you believe in ghosts what and whatever your answer is why and also do you have a ghost story please say yes i i don't believe in ghosts at all they're just they're just not real no oh here's here's a story of you know i was living my life going outside and i didn't encounter any ghosts wait what oh it's pretty interesting so skeppy calls me up and he's trying to get some content you know make an entertaining video for his fans and you know me i'm a good guy so i do what any good friend would do in this situation which is everything in my power to ruin his day yo skeppy i made a cool puzzle for you to do you gonna kill me for views i would never do that so anyhow there i am in my class and watching ted talk the entire ted talk is about introverts and how school is kind of based on extroverts with how much a group interaction there is and all like the group projects and things like that and once once you're finished listening to the ted talk my teacher turns to us and goes all right guys now have a group discussion on it tell tell each other what you liked what you dislike i'm sitting here like did you listen to the same video we did and it's funny i think she even had like a moment of self-awareness about like what kind of assignment she was giving us like let's have a group discussion on this video that just told us at school there's too many group discussions and i think for just like half a second she realized oh oh no and then she just like she moved on she just is like nope error 404 just don't even acknowledge it just move on like nothing happened i i don't know i feel like violence is like slightly now i'm gonna say slightly obviously violence isn't like justified ever but it's like imagine it okay let's just say there's like violence is one justified if at least you get something out of it if you don't get something out of it it's like zero okay i'm gonna get stabbed help help i don't know i feel like i mean at least violence makes sense if you get something out of it if you don't get anything out of it then what's the point you're just being violent for the sake of violence man come on that's messed up man that's messed up whatever now you might be saying technically what do you mean violence is bad you kill people every episode okay good point but i do it for coins man i need the coins all right it's all justified murderous justified if you get 90 coins per kill okay that's what you should take away from this like what how many coins do i get per kill a hundred coins murder is completely justified a lot of people were really mad when mvp plus plus came out and i suppose that's understandable because hypixel is clearly trying to make money with this rank come on the owner of a company attempting to make a profit that's unheard of he says he appreciates us but then he needs money to buy food not okay and now he expects us to just sit still while we're forced to look at a new color unplayable i quit uninstalling the game this is a roblox channel now i killed someone let's go against all odds what do you mean nothing what what no nothing at all you can't keep bullying people online that's what my teacher said and then i made it a career welcome guys tune up to the skywars it's been a long time in fact it's been an entire i'm not making the same joke that everyone does every single year i hate them so much i remember hearing like the the whole it's been a whole year joke in like third grade and i was like aha that's funny i see what you did there that's that's clever and then i heard it in fourth grade fifth grade sixth seventh eighth ninth tenth eleventh and now twelfth grade and it's like wow you that that's that's original you should you should start a youtube channel sir i would watch your content i don't know i just i can't stand it man it's the same thing it's the same thing it's like making like 80 episodes of skywars who would watch it oh oh wait a minute this looks like a middle school i think that's i think that's what this building is you think yeah it might look like one it does does kind of look like one yeah this looks exactly like my middle school yeah a lot of people seem to like when i talked about my elementary school story so i'm going to talk about my middle school adventures in this episode they i i'm rolling in it's sixth grade the school admins want to put me in a regular math class because all the the advanced math classes are full now i'd never been in an advanced class before so i didn't really care i didn't see what the big deal was my parents apparently my parents were having like a samurai battle with the school officials over this but i didn't really see what the big deal was so i i roll in it's a regular math class what's the big deal i've always been regular math so they hand us a worksheet we're going to be working in a we're going to be working in a group project i look at the worksheet and there's a lot there's a lot of words on the worksheet but what it boils down to the big question that you have to work on at the end is what's seven times eight and i just like it's 56 and the teacher's like wow now consults it with your group like it's it's i turned to my group i'm like it's it's 56 what so what were we supposed to do this for another 40 minutes what what was your pla and then they put me in an advanced math they they just threw me in with the seventh graders man it was what's your tactic for the potatoes well you see i uh i placed a lot of dirt and then i placed some water and then i placed the potatoes oh and don't forget the torches that was that was an essential part of the process tanner's where to feel like i feel like you're you're not you're mocking me well there's a lot of food here tana bed i feel like you're just mocking me when i'm i'm asking you for your tactics today all right it's it's not rocket science wilbur it's just farming like all things in life the first step is to give them a ton of monies they were asking me questions i just left like a large portion of the essay section blank it asked me questions like uh well i guess i can't say the specifics of the question because i signed a contract of academic integrity when i took the test that i would uh never never talk about the contents which is just who respects that contract though like if you take like the sat and it's like never speak of this test under like you know penalty of death or whatever like the college board does yeah s.a.t tests people i don't know who's in charge i just i blame the college board for everything good and bad like if we we bombed syria or something that was that was the college board that was the college where it's doing i shouldn't have mentioned that my comment section is going to be completely destroyed even though i stated a fact and didn't actually have any opinion attached to it but comment section rip rest in peace comment section it's okay technoblade we understand winning that much bed wars must be born no no no win in bed wars doesn't get boring for me the win streak gets born because i can only play when like you know my my teammates are all in line at the same time and my teammates unlike me they can't just sit around play in bed wars all day they have like you know lives rat [ __ ] asks why do i enjoy your videos well you probably have low standards and a lot of free time the college board wants me to write like deep meaningful essays about topics like what have you done to contribute to your academic community i'm sitting here like i went outside once and the sun hurt my eyes zero out of ten would not try again like what does the college would think i'm supposed to be like a productive member of society no i stab people in video games please please accept me into your college i promise i will i will do books multiple books i don't know i don't know what they want man we're saving people for coins that's what we do best and all right here we go just got in a set of superior armor and wanted hot potato books to upgrade i could have just bought some from the auction like a normal person but if hypixel has taught me anything it's that if you have a problem the answer is slavery no one else bridge to middle this is good this is good i i i i did it good i can't speak english everyone makes fun of me they're like oh my god technically it's an english major but he can't speak english it's like no one cares i meant i was going to study how to like write narratives pronunciation has nothing to do with anything you thought i was going to college so i could learn how to pronounce words do you know how much college costs what i feel like my academic situation is weird in a way that a lot of people in real life really i don't really think they entirely can process it because a lot of the time i'll get asked like oh technoblade are you sure you'll have time to maintain your youtube channel in college i'm sitting here like the question is if my youtube channel will afford me enough time to attend college do you think i'm giving up my youtube channel to get an english degree what what what am i gonna pay the bills with books no no no no no for once playing minecraft skywars is the more economically viable just don't get scammed don't don't be dumb online okay that's that's my word of advice of the day don't don't be dumb technical blade valuable advice they're all sitting here getting like full diamond and stuff i think i'm gonna have to like actually try yes that's one that's one oh you i caught are you serious i bought this diamond story for nothing a good game i don't believe you just did that i can't what part of that isn't like a linear progression this was the most predictable outcome there could have been it's more consistent than my upload schedule i'll tell you that it's time for a petition link in the description quick technoblade it wants me to put my real name what if isis hunts me down dude just say you're bob from minnesota no one cares technoblade why why why aren't you playing bedwars when i play skywars and if i play bedwars then like technoblade why aren't you playing skywars and it's like oh my god see the ideal solution would be to play both and upload it every day the problem is that requires a certain amount of consistency and i'm just not a consistent person jinx plays asks what career would you want if you didn't have youtube i would want to be an author i would die because i wouldn't be able to afford food but i'd want to be an author so i did what any self-respecting skyblock player would do and sat in the shop menu buying ice for 30 minutes i'm having fun i dropped out of college for this disclaimer before this video starts all of us are friends and as friends it's our job to insult each other as frequently and viciously as possible because that's what friendship is all about so before you leave that comment saying technoblade you're a big meanie when i made my technoblade channel i was like all right i wanna get 10 million subscribers in the easiest way possible so i bought minecraft it was money well spent on tuesday they haven't showed an update the bed was leader of three major things tnt the knockback stick in my mft the last two nerfs are great but technoblade i like the knockback stick well that's too bad for you because we only listen to people whose opinions don't suck i feel like i got too depressed in this episode so we're gonna have to make up for it by having an outro with a youtuber level of enthusiasm so that was another episode of skywars guys be sure to smash that like button if you want to see more do i hear 12 billion likes did i break my printer [Applause] [Music] you

Channel: Nightmare

Views: 415,973

Keywords: Technoblade, Technoblade clips, Technoblade clips that never get old, Technoblade clips funny, Technoblade clips that cure my depression, Technoblade clips that we should appreciate more, Technoblade clips out of context, Technoblade clips because we miss him, Technoblade moments, Technoblade moments funny, Technoblade moments for edits, Technoblade clips that give me life, Technoblade being Technoblade, Technoblade being a mood, Technoblade sarcastic, Technoblade Facts

Id: mTlEr3xbHy0

Length: 17min 54sec (1074 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 25 2022