Strangest Propositions For 🍑🍑🍑

like the video and subscribe right now and i'll show you a picture of a doggo who knows how to be safe ready three two one what is the strangest way you have been propositioned for shreks i was at a dirty rock bar one night playing pool with a few friends almost the entire time this socially awkward physically unattractive girl is hovering around our group and walking back and forth into my line of sight it quickly became obvious that she was interested in talking to us as she seemed to be at the bar by herself the first thing she says to me is you used to play dungeons and dragons didn't you i could be wrong but my physical appearance doesn't suggest that i used to play dungeons and dragons i only add this in because it just seems like a completely random way to start a conversation at a dirty rock bar i see she's lonely so i start chatting with her and notice she is carrying around this notebook after talking about the band for a little bit she tells me this a journal of sorts where she writes down ideas poems and short stories she asks me if i would like to read something i say sure why not it was a short story about a girl going to a bar with a purse full of condoms picking up random guys and having crazy shreks with them after i get done reading it she looks at me opens her purse that has a ton of condoms in it and says so what did you think of my story one summer for extra cash i might have been 20 at the time i took a job with a taxi company that the father of a friend of mine owned one day i bring a pretty nasty looking strung out chick from a housing project to the supermarket the beater lands on five dollars and ten cents she looks at me holds a five out and says what can i do to make up the rest with a suggestive tone i just came right back if it's only worth 10 cents i don't want it shoulder said show me yo tits it's worth 10 cents and you can't get stds i was at a public park walking my dog one cold and stormy night and there was this little girl sitting on the swings not swinging not moving just head looking down i looked around and slowly approached and asked if she was okay she said no i'm lost mister that is the strangest way i've been propositioned for shreks the condoms were for her penis but the hammer is her penis when i 18 and working at a summer camp a 14-year-old camper came up to me and said i've been told i give good i told her i've been told statutory is a i got a call from my girlfriend telling me her two friends and her were looking for a place to drink the bottles of strawberry hill they had acquired and asked if they could come over told her sure my girlfriend is blonde and swedish having arrived a few years earlier and one of her friends a petite brunette with gorgeous pale skin and the other a more filled out brunette all three just gorgeous they came over and popped open the bottles and after they had a buzz going my girlfriend goes into the kitchen saying she's going to make a peanut butter and honey sandwich she calls out asking where the honey is i tell her she says she can't find it so i go to the kitchen to get it for her and she surprises me by squishing the plastic bare bottle of honey with its lid off over my head i was like wtf and the three girls are wrapped with laughter i rack it up to them getting drunk and having a laugh so i don't get very mad i tell them to pardon me i'm hopping in the shower to wash off the honey i go through my bedroom to my bathroom turn on the water to heat up the shower pull off my clothes and get in was in there for maybe a minute when the bathroom door opens and all three girls get into the shower with me ended up in bed the happiest guy on earth i'm from sweden and i can confirm this is true in fact we have a word for it jag and swim cur it means good house ghost basically it's a custom that started off in the middle ages when wood was scarce and people would have to take showers in the same bathtub to conserve heat and have shreks just to stay warm enough to survive in fact i'm married with three children and yet nobody thinks it's cheating when the power goes out and the girls from the neighboring nursing institute shower duck me in the morning although my wife does complain if the water bill is high she says they take advantage of our kindness about eight years ago pre-wife slash pre-kids i went out to a club we had been drinking for some time i was on the verge of belligerent and stumbled upon some random club it was packed couldn't walk and three lines deep to the bar we were standing in line listening to some aztec no music beating my eardrums to a pulp deciding on holding out when someone grabbed my junk this was not in any way a ropes i accidentally brushed against you this person got a fistful of meat i immediately got the uh violated feeling and snagged the person's wrist i twisted it around her back her being understood when i got tail whipped by her hair and politely asked why she felt the need to grab my junk i had a couple feelings one my first feeling was my finger was being forced up her bum outside her dress and two i've never been so turned on in my life fast forward a few hours i ditched my friend went to her place and i started undressing in her bedroom as my pants hit the floor an ugly ass british bulldog comes out of nowhere and snags my pants again i'm now beyond drunk and i punch the dog in the nose to release my pants seriously i just bought them for this night hell if i was going to let a one-night stand spunk us dog chew him up next thing i know my back towards her and her bed her hand comes around groping again when i feel something else peculiar her chest was rubbing against my midsection of my back and i also felt something else on my bum my first thought was damn this chick is freaky and freaky was not the best way to describe it i turned noticing the chick now in questions to graze against my thigh as i bring my left fist across the tranny's jaw she drops to the bed dick and boobs bouncing i turn only to find the damn dog with my pants again kick him in the nose snatch my clothes off the floor and all ass out never been to a bar since well there was this one time while i was out some chick waved at me not knowing her i just smiled and waved back turns out her boyfriend was behind me and they proceeded to make out in front of me i hope you all got ducking aids from these the summer after senior year of high school i was hanging out with a good friend and his girlfriend she had a very hot friend over i knew this girl's name but that's about it we are all watching a movie and this girl grabs a blanket and sits right next to me it's june so blankets aren't needed unless of course you want to secretly jerk someone off under it which is exactly what she wanted to do after a few minutes of this she stands up and says bmb0x and i would like to chat in private for a few minutes and motions to the spare bedroom down the hall she asks me to grab a drink for her no idea what's going on i grab a drink and head to the room open the door and she is naked except a thong on the bed we have wild amazing shreks for an hour never hear from her again i was in my early twenties sitting with a large group at a blues bar this cooper with enormous jugs and breath that could pickle cabbage had been eating me up for the better part of an hour and finally got up the nerf to come over to our table she leaned over and said god you're ducking hot you remind me of my son i don't want to scare the younger editors mine was repeated several times over a 12-month span it went something like this get your in here i've just taken my temperature and i think i'm ovulating sai in high school my best friend rented a hotel room and threw a little party because he was leaving for the navy soon thing is the party was not a party at all i got there and it was just me and him he was a good guy in my best bud so i didn't think a ton of it at the time then he whips out his dick and asks me to show him mine nope i still brushed it off and the incident didn't change much i went on to be best man in his wedding a few months later he came out of the closet as flaming ass gay he was a duck toy for some fairly rich and famous people it wasn't till he came out of the closet that i realized that hotel room thing was a proposition for guests wit she got in the cab and asked me to take her friends home first after they got out of the cab she hopped up front and started whipping out her perky cans the showing of cans is a common occurrence so i didn't think much of it at the time but when we pulled into her parking lot she points me to a spot right in front of her door right under the light and says the truck we are next to is her husband's then she handed me twenty dollars ripped my pants open and buried her face on my bone that was finished quick she was good then she hops in the back of the cab pulls down her pants and bends over nope had my money already blew one ward it was barclays time and had to go another one just kept staring at me and saying in and out this went on for 20 minutes she was hammered big time she wouldn't get out of the cab she kept trying to climb onto my lap again this was at barclo's time when i finally got her to get out of the cab she fell flat on her ass and couldn't get up hammered she's still staring at me saying in and out i pick her up and help her to the apartment i finally ask her do you mean that you want to duck she nods in agreement and pulls my face to her cans and utters her apartment number she comes to a little more and just starts yanking me into her room she rips open her shirt and throws herself on the bed i was basically creeped the duck out and left i either had to help her inside or call the cops i couldn't just leave the outside in the winter but still this chick was ready to duck within two minutes of meeting her pick-up line was in and out she was persistent i got a call to pick two people up i get there and it's an older dude with some stinky fat young broad we get to the destination he goes into the store and has me and the chick wait outside within a minute of him being gone she starts talking about how much she loves to duck and she whips out her cans she asks if i want to come into the back and duck her i smiled and said no thanks she then went on to tell me that she had just an hour earlier had anal shreks with some dude for 20 dollars i'm not even gonna go on but there is more some girl i was talking to over aim said she was waiting for me to date her this is a girl who i only talked to once in high school so it was like four years later she found me on my space she said all of this stuff about how we were supposed to be together and engage in copious amounts of shreks needless to say i was pretty shocked so i sat there trying to think of something to say then she calls me and says that it was her cousin typing to me on her own name or something she then said something like either way i'm willing to duck if you are she was a very strange person when i was 16 my friend and i were looking around spencer's he wandered off in some older mid-20s maybe chick cycled up to me and says hey have you ever had oral shreks i wasn't sure i heard her right so i asked her to repeat herself have you ever had oral shreks i tell her no so she says do you want to now i know bjs are relatively hard to come by at that age when you're kind of a cheek but something inside me told me that good things probably wouldn't come of saying yes i told her no and left to wait outside for my friend he laughed at me all the way to the car i don't know if it's technically the strangest but the ball ceased i've been propositioned was at a party at my college dorm the guy was the friend of a friend flown in to visit us in sunny hall ae we have a welcome party and about two hours into it that is two hours into meeting him at all we run out of liquor and i have to grab more from my room he accompanies me and suddenly points a finger down the hall point hey what's that i look for that and he roughly the good rough pushes me against the wall and dives in for a kiss it was a pretty adorable mix of childish tricky and manly confidence his gambit paid off held my 21st birthday party at my apartment in college on a friday night girl i was kind of friends with friend of a friend and who i had been flirting with for a few weeks shows up and asks me to unlock my bedroom so she can leave her toothbrush and clothes for tomorrow in there i was about 16 and a surfer skater at the time myself and a couple of mates were hanging out at a local skate shop a couple of hours after closing just basically drinking a bit and skating around inside the shop anyway one of the girls working there would have been in her early to mid twenties and was that kind of tattooed hot skater girl we all wanted her but never thought we had a chance until this night i have no idea how it came up but after a bit of drinking and me bragging that i could land a double kick flip off the table she said if you can land that i'll give you a none of us could believe it but the older guys who worked there laughed and it seemed pretty serious i'd never actually landed the kiki off a bench or table so i was basically just talking needless to say i jumped up onto the bench half drunk and skated to the end the double kick flip came off flawlessly i landed it perfectly and spun around and looked right at her the older guys laughed she grabbed my hand and we went to the back room and the debt was paid in full for a while there i was a ducking legend with the rest of my mates there we were out drinking when one of my friends was approached by a girl who was well i thought she was a little drunk but not too bad off at any rate she was coming on to my friend pretty heavily and he was shrugging her off we finally decide to leave since the girl really wouldn't let him alone and as we go see shouts across the bar duck my cervix no joke you've been visited by a space doggo this doggo will take you to space but only if you comment where are we going doggo thanks for watching do not forget to subscribe for more daily videos

Channel: TZ Entertainment

Views: 40,918

Rating: 4.9552984 out of 5

Keywords: reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2019, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, dankify, tz reddit, toadfilms, invitation

Id: O3Q7Xl3P6wQ

Length: 15min 9sec (909 seconds)

Published: Thu Nov 26 2020