Spreading the Tomboy Truth | Crusader Kings 3

hello there have you heard the good word no well first you'll have to bear witness to the word of our sponsor paradox they have generously bankrolled today's video and my priestly garb in order to tell you about their game crusader kings 3. if you click on the link in the parchment below you'll be able to find out more enjoy the video yes indeed welcome to crusader kings sorry i've just seen the small child hiding behind his father's cape we shall be playing in iberia a place of broken kingdoms and competing faiths there are two muslim religions in the south the ashari and the mullah and in the north are the catholics who are all of different cultures as well as king sancho we have only one goal introduce a new faith and have that faith win the peninsula when the peninsula is secure and under the control of the true believers not even necessarily ourselves but just those who believe in our religion then we can consider our job complete to begin with we're going to need a lot of piety we're going to need to focus on theology there we go and we're going to go down the theologian path to get to the prophet though we are a holy man we must marry immediately in order to cure a future for our kingdom primarily because this is going to get us an alliance with the duchy of normandy who has 5 000 soldiers at the ready oh darling you have such a lovely army of spearmen i'm first in line for the kingdom of leon we look at the kingdom of lyon that is my brother here's the interesting thing his heir is me and my air is him it's just a shame that he's going to fall down all of those stairs it is now time for a war we fully intend to spread our religion peacefully once it's been established but in order to do that we need to have a strong kingdom to defend that religion from specifically from the muslims in the south but see here's the thing is the muslims already don't like us being catholic and in iberia when we make our new religion the catholics won't like us either we will indeed be caught between a rock and a hard place and we'd better be a very hard place if we want to survive uh so i was going to rely on my ally to assist me here however my ally is duke william ii the bastard of normandy who's just invaded england so i suppose i'm joining that then i guess we're invading england now this wasn't really how i expected things to go but you know what they say when an opportunity presents itself you take it dover shall fall soon to my men it's good practice for the fights to come in iberia i never knew i'd crusade in england i got 200 prestige and some opinion from that brilliant but i now have an ally in england as in the king of england is my ally oh god damn it now the norwegians are invading now that that is all done we may carry on with our original plan of invading the kingdom to our west leon of course we are handling with an assassination ah no no no was it me no no no no i think i'll call king william to help on this there we go oh the entirety of england comes to my aid oh so sorry king philip of france has joined as oh no oh we've just started world war one oh god no oh oh i've made a massive mistake oh perfect timing enforced demands we've fought alongside england fought the french taken over part of percussion now we only need to wait for just a little bit to let my soldiers recover and then we'll invade leon and take that as well wait a second one of my vassals is actually attacking leon that's the war they're fighting right now and it's it's my brother who i invaded and beat so the brother that i invaded and conquered is invading the third brother and is going to win which will mean that i will be the liege of my brother who is the liege of my brother it's just starting to look like our family tree a hundred percent enforced demands there we go and disbands look at our kingdom now we grow my mom's dead that's sad anyway she died on the day of our victory one of our ancestors is called conan apparently grows strong son codan ah a daughter let's name her after an ancestor god damn it adelaide stop rubbing it in my face i'm aware melbourne sucks right now you bloody bastards oh we are steps away from getting theologian which means we can get more piety and then hopefully actually get our own religion i wish to become a paragon of virtue please and then start at my own heresy you know that that kind of virtue oh no someone's trying to murder muhammad isn't isn't muhammad in jail he's my prisoner i wonder if that someone is me yep i can i can do it um yep oh no we'd better stop the villain okay i like how i find out about it i find out about a scheme and i'm like you know what that sounds like a great idea no the crusader kings deus vote i like this music that is just started the moment disappeared the faith will prepare for a war huzzah let's go crusade for jerusalem see the whole reason i'm doing this is to get more piety to break away from christianity but let's do it oh you're wondering what's in the bible it's all just tomboys welcome brothers to tomboy supremacy armed pilgrimages medical to preachers and carnal exaltations the three tenets of our religion indeed nothing shall stop us from overrunning iberia with tomboys and establishing them as the true rulers of the land our view on gender equal our only difference from christianity however marriages are allowed consorts and concubines and divorces always legal as for crime same-sex relations are accepted because that shit's hot male adultery accepted female adultery also accepted witchcraft and deviancy only shunned but the real truth of it all the clergy are to be women the clergy are also to be used for recruitment and war yes that's right they can fight as commanders and knights meaning that all their clergy are warrior women who are legally allowed to be married it is considered a sin to be chased and a virtue to be lustful all aboard the tomboy boat it's beautiful it's so beautiful so i guess we're just not in the crusade anymore no wait we're still part of the crusade unto jerusalem is that man wearing two hats i think there's just a boat here the holy site of santiago oh we actually tom boys need to need to take control of it all tomorrow [Laughter] the tomboy schism oh my god this is amazing i love these stupid names oh i immediately died brilliant just after i die my son steps in he is a true believer in tomboyism as well all right toma let's spread the word my pope of the tomboys is already calling a crusade and they're going for jerusalem someone by the name of habibi and her family has arrived but uh i can tell her she's only allowed to stay if she embraces tomboy supremacy brilliant i could establish a holy order of tomboys all this has to happen i need 20 more bucks and three in a row pie 80. uh god yeah it's quite expensive to make them but all right we're going to do that we need to get a holy order of tomboys ready the city here we go we have all the money we have all the faith finally we are founding a tomboy holy order i believe i'll be taking a short vacation at the monastery of tomboys the knights templar wait that's is it damn it i wanted to like i wanted to name it myself but i guess that's what we're calling it the patron is myself it has 1 000 soldiers two nights so 200 order nights 100 800 levies it's grand mitch's a mistress beatrice of knights templar who leads it and it's no cost to hire them if we're at war with a hostile faith amazing absolutely brilliant a crusade for galaxia this is an issue this is a very big issue wait amir yep wait the afasids joined my war what what what is hang on the muslims are fighting on the side of of tom wayism what i don't understand right yeah it seems we've lost uh there is just tens of thousands of soldiers here now there is there is no hope yep and uh and one of my daughters died in combat and i've had a mental break and thus we have lost galacia my irish wife gave birth in full battle armor this is good we should we shall name our son mail in uh there we go in honor of her victory looks like galaxy is being invaded already what's happening over here oh wait no there's a tomboy uprising by the gods the tomboys are winning as well tomboys rise up oh my god the populist uprising of tomboys are actually winning the war i can't believe that's actually what it's just occurred oh my god it just happened there is now a tomboy ruler in charge once more amazing we must we must get an alliance me and you let's go yes use an alliance boom we didn't even need to uh we didn't even need to it's called bloody invade him it's back under tomboy control this is amazing please tell me my men arms are still around yes they are good good can i call in my uh no because they're still okay if these i have actually not even get to use the holy order i paid so much money for because they keep calling crusades that never happen i'm certainly the religions that don't call holy wars actually are better than ones that do and the the crusade failed brilliant thank you very much okay fine i'm glad at least the crusade is over so i can now use my holy order for once don't start another one right why is the holy roman empire in north africa i'm sorry what i just i haven't been looking at the map for most of this game and then suddenly there's just all right yeah i guess that's down there oh god no it's just stop i'm just i'm not fighting you i'm just surrendering you can have the territory i don't care it's not worth it it's just not worth it finally i get to actually call in the knights templar i'm so happy the commander of the knights templar has 31 commander advantage holy hell all right we're going to abuse the hell out of using her she's going to fight her battles for us yo i've just discovered i can get an alliance with the tomboy papacy yes wait are you actually just oh you're the pope i can actually just marry the pope hell yeah can i now get the pope involved in my war please oh i can ally with a peasant revolt sure an ethiopian peasant revolt as well go on daughter all right holy war for this duchy which is gonna be a big claim we go yes we then raise up our forces which are quite strong we're gonna call in the night's templar as well brilliant and then we start calling in the allies all right so we have 9 000 troops to start us off how many troops do you got you got 2 000 more come on in it's going to be a great war this is going to be amazing we're actually gonna finally smash the muslims and actually like break up this massive block of power they have oh i can't wait we're finally actually expanding south rather than just desperately clinging to our kingdom this war is going brilliantly way better than i could have expected now it's just a case of sieging down a few more castles and we're good brilliant work let's stand everyone down there we go oh stand down as well oh i can actually usurp the title here we go let's uh let's usurp the title there we go and now it's ours it's tool deo lovely lovely let's also take some consorts hello there paul wait polish muslim 63 year old polish muslim that can give my children the giant trait sure get in here you're my consort oh my god stop invading jerusalem something i'd never thought i'd say in this game oh oh oh the kingdom of leon's actually can be won by someone other than my candidate by a countess brick oh no this is this isn't okay see there is another solution to my problem which is just doing this and now i'm next in line see that's the brilliant thing is i don't care about queen adelaide she can die she's gonna die that's that's the idea at some point she will die hopefully soon i already hope she would but she's lived to the ripe old age of 66 somehow please hurry up and die so that my child can finally actually like do things nice she's going to be a great person just a lot of people had to die to get her to where she needs to be there's actually a surprising number of people who are signing up to invade jerusalem and it kind of scares me but still not enough yes finally she drank herself to death uh bubonic plague excuse me hmm all right hello there child yes i would like to ransom you please get the hell out of my dungeon get out of my dungeon please thank you oh god oh it's finally over oh wow i actually managed to like get him out fast enough only one person died during the outbreak oh thank god finally finally finally holy war 4 kingdom they have 15 000 warriors to their name they have a couple of pretty good allies we've got a couple of good allies ourselves i think we can do this i think we can do this okay we're targeting the right one this is all good we've got a bunch of allies okay declare war now let's go through and do everything shall we we group our forces here and then we charge damneded fools yes oh this is a big battle but we're gonna win it easy easy easy oh wow the mongols have just shown up that's fun oh he's having a good time i'm sure oh well it's actually oh mongolia exists oh yeah i guess we do go this far east don't we yeah there we go 95 we're almost there god it's just taking so long like it's such a big war yes enforce demands there we go oh boy oh never mind 68 000 soldiers coming to just beat the out of me i'm just gonna surrender like it's literally it's not worth the effort to fight these guys it's better to surrender and then just invade the kingdom that they make ten minutes later that's it that's it that's all i'm gonna do i know there's a giant wall going on but i get a pet cat yay i get to name it oh what i shall name it pause okay enforced demands demands are enforced disband troops this should be it yes create the empire of hispania there we go i am now a mighty emperor oh well barcelona's there okay i'm gonna invade you pretty soon but uh now every time we die i will stay in complete control of at least iberia which is important because that's what i want now i just need a little bit of prestige so i'm gonna i'm gonna go for a hunt and that'll uh pet pause what oh i get to play with my cat that's so adorable you get to pat the cat that's amazing all right anyway back-to-back doing the hunt so i can actually get enough prestige to uh to put it to a vote okay so duke is either next in line or not next in line for everything but it doesn't actually matter because the only thing that matters is that he is next in line for emperor which is the important one okay lovely how goes the spreading of tomboy oh there's still a bit to work on that's fine that's fine but we can we can get it there oh pause left me two gold thanks pause so um my half sister who was originally my heir has been romancing me and now i can become her soul mate this is concerning she becomes my soul mate great my half sister is my soul mate this is kind of weird wow my son and his sister are lovers i don't know why i'm judging that considering that's true for me too i can invite them to my chambers for some family time what i sleep with both of them and i knocked up my daughter oh and my half-sister's now mad that i my daughter my daughter's in jail uh i'll break it off promise my daughter gave birth in jail and my son is also in jail because of it uh you know what i'm just gonna leave him as a bastard name him jafredo and leave him as a bastard there we go whoa wait hang on there's a crusade for england this time that might actually succeed except it won't because just there's so many catholics in this world but still oh she wants as a canterbury that's why she wants to take it wait wait wait what we own jerusalem what one of the many crusades that i was just ignoring succeeded and a tomboy has taken over jerusalem and he's from my house tomboy actually exists in jerusalem i i so am i i didn't think that that was gonna i was just like putting it out of mine i would just deny every single crusade i don't think we can get a better ending point than that hispania has been made tomboy rules over most of iberia and also jerusalem i cannot believe it that is so perfect my god thank you all for watching that was a very long game of crusader kings 3. i really enjoyed that i'm not allowed to do any actual reviews yet but i will say i really enjoy the game as someone who enjoyed crusader kings 2 this feels like crusader kings 2 taken to 11 and is really fun and the new features are really fun to play with and i managed to write tomboy across all of iberia that's it oh the the coin pouch oh this yes well what secrets do i have here hmm they're all just worth as originals

Channel: Rimmy Downunder

Views: 572,048

Keywords: Rimmy, Downunder Gaming, Gameplay, Funny Moments, Funny Montage, Memes, Crusader Kings 3, Crusader Kings, Paradox, Crusader Kings 3 gameplay, Crusader Kings 3 religion, tomboy, ck3, ck3 gameplay, ck3 preview, crusader kings 3 preview, crusader kings iii, paradox interactive, crusader kings iii gameplay, crusader kings 3 features, crusader kings gameplay, crusader kings 3 map, crusader kings 3 reaction, grand strategy, paradox development, crusader kings 3 paradox

Id: -q6NkCOV9bg

Length: 19min 59sec (1199 seconds)

Published: Tue Aug 25 2020