- For the next 24 hours, the Sidemen will be working on a farm. [Sidemen cheer] - Poo-poo, yeah! [Sidemen laughing]
[clippers buzz] [dramatic music] [Sidemen screaming] [Sidemen laughing] - Right, boys, let's get onto it. We've got a lot of jobs
to do, let's move on. - Can I piss and poo anywhere? - Yeah. Go mad. - No, don't tell him that. - Don't tell him that. Tell him to use the toilet.
- Don't don't tell him that. - As long as you sign anything
you leave behind, hey. - You haven't seen what he's
done to the campfire. [laughs] - I'll befriend at least one animal today. - The chickens are the best. - The chick, I'll make, honestly, I'll make friends with a chicken. - We're riding in style today. This ain't no holiday video. - Good team witch. - Geez. - I'm getting a seat. [upbeat guitar music] [trailer clanks] - How does it feel? [KSI Laughs] - Well, someone's gotta
sit on the floor, boss. - Someone on the planks.
- Wow. Really guys? - Aw, no.
- No, no, no. - Yeah, moo-moo. We out here farming in that. - Yeah, we're doing so
much farming right now. - Gang, gang on these animals. - He's all happy now. - That sounds mad by the way. - He's just gotta see what he's gotta do and he's like, "nah". - He's like an hour
and he's done. [laughs] - Chopping up them pigs, yeah. - No.
- Eating. - No, no, no, no, no, no. Not that kinda thing. - Alright, we squeezing
them pigs, you know. - No.
- What? [Sidemen laugh] - We squeezing the milk
outta that cow fam. - I want everyone, this
is for like cattle? - We know better,
honestly, I think we're... - We are the cattle. - You think you're better than cattle? - No. - I think we are less useful
to the farm than cattle. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, that's right. - Seen what we're about to do. - Actually, wait. - Hopefully it's not too
bumpy, I might slip inside you. [Sidemen laughing] - Oh, sh*t.
- Oh, f*cking hell. Yeah baby. Yeah! - Is that suppose to work? - Bumpy ride, bumpy. Oh yeah. Wiggle it about. You dirty snag! Yeah! - Are you all right? - I am not all right.
[Sidemen laugh] - What's happened? This is like that delusion where, like, he's trying to get into it. - You trying to pretend that he enjoys it. - Yeah. - I give it one hour until I'm KSI. - While on a farm. - Oh I see a tractor. - Trac-or. - I got a brand new cormator,
I'll give you the things. - Whose idea was this? [Sidemen laughing] - It's slowly sinking in. - Hang on a second. - That doesn't look safe. At all. [door rattles] - Imagine we get out and he just goes, he just pulls out a gun and goes, "You have five minutes." [Sidemen laugh] - Oh my god. There's so many sheeps. - Oh yeah.
- There's hundreds of sheeps. - So many sheeps. - Oh, wow. [imitates sheep] [upbeat country music] [Sidemen groan] - They're all our fans. - Oh. [trailer rattles] [Sidemen groan] - Bro, I've got air tape. - You got air bro. - f*cking hell. - Bumpy enough for ya's? - Yeah.
- Was good. - Ay, yo. All the sheep are looking. - They said, "bra, is that KSI?" - Aw, baby sheep. - Wow.
- Hey, what's up? I'm here. I know, I know, right? - That's what they doing. - I'm out here. Gang, gang. Gang, gang. Super nut. - They're running away. - I'll give good money for trip and fall into the electric fence, you know. - No guys. No. If you wanna fall, come towards me. - He'll come down soon. He's gonna realise what he's gotta do. - Guys. You guys are my fans. [sheep baaing] [imitates sheep baaing] - This guy needs to stop
doing this in front of me. [Sidemen laugh] Twice today, bru. - Twerking all over him now. - There's sh*t everywhere. - Yeah. Yeah.
- That's why its a farm, bro. - Right, so we'll need
to get the pen set up, get the sheep in. We're gonna shear a few of the sheep. We're gonna take some
poo samples off the lambs to make sure they're in top condition. That's your job. - Yeah. [laughing] - You can see if it's chocolate. [Sidemen laugh] - He's been asking about poo all day. So it does sound like a job for him. - Right, let's got then. - They seem to have all run away from us. - Yeah, yeah, they don't like
a lot of people or noise. - Why is this literally work experience? - Let's get stuck in. - That's what it is.
- Yeah, that's what it is. - Should we give the sheep a skin fade? [Sidemen laugh] - Right Boys, let's get this set up. So we wanna grab some of these pens and pull 'em out in a line here. Then we'll walk the sheep down and bring the pen behind them, so they're held there and
they come through here and then we'll put some
in the shearing trailer for our oaks to shear. And then you guys can roll the wool up, ready for sending off to the wallboard and we'll do some poo
samples in the meantime. - Wow.
- Why do you do that? - It's to check, it
goes off to a laboratory and then the guys tell us what the lambs are in good condition or if they need medicine and stuff. It's better than just
giving them medicine, thinking they're ill if
we know there's a problem or we know they're in good
condition, we're on it. - Oh, fair enough. - So, send some of yours in if you like. - Talk to us, what do we grab? - Yeah, what are we grabbing? - So these things here.
- Yeah. - They're nice and light, two at a time or some of you bigger lads can take more and slide 'em along and
attach to the end there. So if I get started,
you guys can follow me. - Cool. - I got a brand new com. - Oh no, these are tied up. [upbeat country music] - That's what that pen just got. One, two combo. Good night. - You drop it in. - Yeah, yeah, Get that bit there. - Is this right end? - Other end, I think. - Excellent. - Put it right in the hole, yes. - Yeah, see. - Look at that.
- You know it. We're basically farmers already. - So we're supposed to
get the sheep into this? - Yeah. - The sheep that have run
500 metres over there? - Why have you looped it around that way? - Doesn't need to go all that way. No, no, that's fine. - Not that far.
- The pens here. - So now we set up, we'll bring
it in, so they go passing. - Yeah, what they trying to create, bruv? [Sidemen laugh] - That's really sad. Like five people have
worked on doing something and then the farmers now having to do it 'cause it was done wrong. - You liking farming already? - I'm enjoying it, I might get stuck in. - Yeah, you like the fresh air, yeah? - It's kind of fresh. [laughs] - Oh, it doesn't smell too bad though. - No, it actually doesn't smell as bad as I thought it would.
- No, no, no. - Look at that. - Yeah, line it up. - Although...
- Josh, you missed. - Yeah, you missed the hole. Every hole's a goal. - Really? - Not every hole. [Sidemen laugh] - She's looking beautiful. She's looking sexy, you know? Yeah. [claps] This pen's gonna be pen-a-ful. That was bad, I'm sorry. That was... That was atrocious. - We better start getting these sheep in. Otherwise we're can
have a lot of wet people and not much sheep action. - Simon, what would you, what poem would you give for the pen? - What? - I dunno.
- This is called a pen, right? - I'd need to write one. You know I'd need? [hand slaps] A pen. - Oh, I get it. Bro, you see, this is why he's the goat. - What a pen this is. This might be the best pen. - Is this when they go? - Yeah, we have to get him in first. - Yeah, we have to get the sheep in. - How are we getting? - We're walking 'em down.
- We run over and we say, oh! - We're walking 'em down here. - Okay. So should we start? - No, he's our lead all day. - Chris?
- Yo. - Can we go get him? - Let's go get 'em.
- Or them. - Okay, right, the fence is live. - Oh no.
- Fence is live. - Fence is on boys. - But my fear is, is that
not touching the fence there? Is that gonna be the whole thing? - No, I just pulled it off.
- Oh, okay. - But when they're in, we'll take it off because if it does touch the fence, then all these will become powered up. - Yeah, yeah. - These sheep dunno
what's about to hit 'em. - Well. - Yeah, bazinga, bro. - Aint nothing's about to hit them. [Sidemen laugh] - Enjoy yourself?
- Yeah, yeah, no. - You like this?
- I'm excited. - You had any exposure to
this sort of thing before? - This isn't my first
ever farm experience. - Yeah, yeah?
- Yeah, so. I'm ready for it. - All right, let's move some sheep. - Oh, look, the sheep are doing it. - Chris is doing it.
- Let's go, let's go. - Chris is doing the thing. - I feel like a farmer cock. [loud, high pitched shouts] Oh. - Okay, we've gotta take
note and do what he does. - Wow. - To pretend to be a f*cking dog. - He's a dog, yeah.
- He's sheep whisperer. - No. He's a dog, look. - Oh wow. - Oh that's f*cking terrifying. - Oh god, oh god. - It's a stampede. - Whoa. - Oh my god. - No.
- Oh my god. [loud, high pitched shouts] Oh no. - Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - They really don't like us and I don't blame them. I don't blame them for not
wanting to come near us. - Maybe they've more. - Okay, you guys come. - Oh, this is bad. Tobi's just carrying pins though, like he's about to murder one of them. Come on, come here sheep. Lamb kebab.
- Yeah. - Let's put you in a skewer.
- Lamb Kofta. [Sidemen laugh] [loud, high pitched screams] - It worked.
- Oh yeah. - That's all sh*t in his bum. - Get in the pan. - Imagine having that many dangle berries. - Their legging it. - How many of them you
reckon you could take? - Oh, I'd say all of them. - What?
- Sorry? - JJ has just said he
could take all of them. - Nah.
- Yeah, you are nuts. - When they was all running
towards us, you first. - When they was running, you were shook. - Just constant kicks. - No, but there's too many. I feel a little bit
useless in this segment. I've done nothing. - Sidemen walk on a farm. - Come on lads, pick the pace up. - Pick the pace up, he
said, pick the pace up. [imitates dog yapping] - I'd be terrified if I was a sheep. [Sidemen laugh] - A Sidemen chase sheep. Just what people wanted
to tune into on a Sunday. [imitates dog yapping] - Oh yeah, see, they
know the drill already. They know what they're doing. - They know the drill. - Yeah, we're coming back
for the other two as well. - Yeah, we know you're out there. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh, look at that, smooth. Oh, he's done it. Smooth criminal man. [imitates dog yapping] - Keep it going.
- Oh well that's quite sweet. - They're probably quite
excited to get shaved, you know? Do you reckon they feel like us when we go and get a fresh fade? - There's no escape now. - Plus 10 attributes. - Someone shat on his head. Who shat on you?
- No, no. - No! No! - That's like a road to sophomore. [Sidemen laugh] - That just happened. They've been doing the game show out here. - You lost the game. [Sidemen laugh] - sh*t head. [laughs] [sheep baas] sh*t head, sh*t head. [laughs] - It's you thead. - It's your thead. [laughs] - Do you know a think that
they, just a face bit, sort of looks like a lion. - No.
- Absolutely not. - It's very tiny lion. Just the face bit. - sh*t head. - Bro. - What do you think of KSI's content? [both laughing] - They're just so mad. - Yeah. - For 32,000 pounds, What form is gold often stored in? [sheep baas]
Correct. [Sidemen laugh] Say can bar. - I get it.
- Nice. - Brilliant.
- Nice. - Hey friend. - Why does sh*t head, like,
sort of talking to me? - I think sh*t head like you, actually. - He think you and him are the same. - Whoa.
- What do you mean by that? - Whoa, Vik. [Sidemen laugh] - Vik that's nuts bro. - What you mean by that? [laughs] - Pin guy, where's the pin? - I got the pin.
- He's got the pin. - I'm a pin guy. Pin guy. - What up pin guy? - Thank you man. - Let's do this thing. Who wants to sort some sheep? - I'll sort some sheep.
- Yeah. - So, right, they come up here and what we do is it's a three way shed. Lambs go this side. So just turn his little head,
it's facing the wrong way. - You gotta grab him by the head. - Mums. No, no, you don't have to grab. It's just once they get running,
they keep turning around. Come on. So when there's two in there,
they'll be a little happier. So there, lambs. - Oh my gosh. I'll mess this up. - Mums. - That's skills.
- Oh wow. - Yeah, what happens if we mess it up? - You mess it up, you go home. [Sidemen laugh] - Quarter's a forfeit. - Oh. - It's like forfeits, huh? - Come on mom. - Yeah, look at that. - Come on babies. So then some of you's
needs to open that up. Let some more through. - Come on then.
- Come on pin man. - How many?
- You're the guy. - How many you want? - Go on pin man. - Is it this?
- Open it up. - This one?
- Bust it open. - Just slide that little pin. - How many you want? - Send them all.
- All of them. - All of them?
- All of them. - You're gonna have help here. - Lemme tease them. - All right, we'll tell you what's coming. - Tease them in. - You've got a mom.
- Mom. - Mom's coming.
- Here comes the mom. - Mum. - They're not gonna come if you shout. [sheep baas] - He's a horse. Mans got hop. - You stay in there. - Okay, we're losing sheep. - You stay in there. - Wait, what? JJ, come
here, JJ, come here. - I'm so, I feel, wow. I feel like I'm gonna f*ck this up. - Go, go, go. - See that jump?
- Yeah? - Trained to do it. [imitates dog yapping] - They're not scared of seagulls. - Mom, mom coming, moms coming. - Oh it's working. [imitates dog yapping]
- Lamb. Lamb. [imitates dog yapping and barking] Lamb. [imitates dog barking] [Sidemen laugh] - Don't wanna play, eh? - You got us to do some. - Lamb. Lamb. Mom. [imitates dog yapping] - He's got it, he's got it. [Sidemen yelling] - Tobi!
- Tobi. - Tobi. - It was your chance to shine. - Tobi let mum in. - She forced her way in. - We got to kill her now. - Mom, got the better of you, ay? - Get in. - Here she comes. Here comes a mom.
- Mom's coming. - Look, look, look, look, hold her. - Incoming.
- I got her. - And some more. - Get some more.
- Get it open again. - Keeps ploughing. [imitates dog yapping and barking] - Wow. - No! [laughs] - Wait a minute.
- Wait, whoa. - No!
- Tobi! - You let another mum in. - Tobi.
- Tobi! - You gotta help me. - Whoa, whoa, whoa sheep. - Whoa. - Two failings. - Tobi man. - Tobi you f*cked it. Now they think the mums come back. - What's going on?
- Go, go, go, go, please. - I'm gonna help you 'cause you lot, you didn't. - But we were trying. [imitates dog yapping] - Hold the lamb, hold the
lamb, hold the lamb, lamb. - Excuse me.
- Nice. Nice, mum.
[imitates dog yapping] - Coming in.
- Push her in. - Get in. - Hard work. Lamb.
- Hold lamb. - Oh, oh, oh, oh, oi. No. Get your f*cking. - JJ, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill. - Get your. Brother. Get in. [imitates dog yapping and barking] - Mom first, mom first. Now, lamb.
- Lamb. - Mom. [imitates dog yapping] - Come on. Come on.
- Chaos. - Oh, mom coming, mom coming,
mom coming, mom coming. - Lamb, lamb, lamb. - They moves so quick
and they're so strong. - Vik just go. [imitates dog yapping] - Hey, you go in, your in bro. Whoa, brother. Brother. - It's sh*t head. - Get in. Come on. - Your stuck his head. - Yeah, mum, mum.
- Lamb. - Almost done, lamb, lamb, lamb. - I think your lucky this time, mate. - I think we're full. - Yeah, yeah, that's probably enough now. - No room in the inn. - How did you get in here? Huh? I'm talking to you. Why are you in here? - So is this supposed to be all lambs? What's happened here then? - Four mothers. - Yeah.
- Yeah. - It's not gone. - That's a new record for you. [Sidemen laugh] - Okay, so we're gonna shear the sheep. Alex is gonna share the
ones we've sorted here. This is one he did earlier. We roll it up into a ball
so it's nice and protected. Goes in the bag and then it
goes off to the wall board to be cleaned and then turned into yarn. Which then, your hats,
your shirts, your socks. Everything's made out of. - It's a real shame his name isn't Alan. Get it? Alan Sheera. - Alan Sheera. - That was good.
- That rolled off the tongue. - That was pretty good. - Thanks guys. I'm here literally all day.
- Yeah. Yeah. [Sidemen laugh] - Well you hope. [Sidemen laugh] - If I get fired or something. - Could always be six of them. - So you pull them down
and it should roll over. - Oh yeah.
- Oh wow. A submissive creature. - Yeah. - He knows all the moves. - Yeah, come on. - Wait, you gotta make it grab your arse. - Yeah, yeah. That calms it down, see if it
gets a bit of ass in its hand, it says I'm okay. - This sheep's getting smoked. Oh, that looks like
it's really refreshing. - Yeah. - Your last haircut, how
much did it cost you? - About 200 quid. - 200 Quid? Guess how much this guy earns
for each sheep he shears. - A fiver? - £1.50, if he's lucky. - Wow. - And he'll do that all day. He'll do 200 sheep. - 200 a day? - Oh, fresh bro.
- Mate, yeah. - Go on fella. [Sidemen cheer] - You know what he looks like? He looks like a piece of cheese. [Sidemen laugh] - When you get. [laughs] - His boys are checking out the cut. - And it's all in one piece. - His boys are like, "dam bro." Come on.
- You look hot. - That's crazy. - What do you reckon it's worth? Hundred pound? - It's gotta be more than £1, a tenner? - This is probably worth, what? 70p? - What? - 60, 70p. - But you're paying, he getting £1.50. - Yeah.
- And it's only worth 70p? How does that work? What's the economics on that one? There is no economics. This is a, for us, this
is a waste product. - Ah, okay.
- In the industry. The wool used to pay the rent. Now it doesn't pay for the lorry
to take it to the wallboard and it doesn't pay his fee.
- Wow. - You know I have to
pay him in other ways. But we won't get into that. [Sidemen laugh] - Anybody wanna roll up a fleece? - I'll try. - Go for it.
- Got gloves anyway. - So you just start from the bum end. We know this is the bum end, 'cause they were marked
with that blue marker. And then it's just rolled in. Ya, you see it's. - Is that a poo? - Alright, so I put it inside. - So you're tucking it in like that. Each side in and then just tightly, yeah, you've got some sh*tty bits there. - Oh, look at that. - Yeah, get rid of the poo. - Get that sh*t out. [Chris laughs] - All right. - So then, yeah. [Sidemen laugh] - Man, f*cking hell. - That went in his beard. - Yeah nice and tight
so it fits in the bag. Doesn't take up too
much room in the lorry. And then he comes round,
right round like that. And then just tucks in the sides. Good enough.
- Wow. - And you've done it. [Sidemen clap] - Wow.
- Well done man. - Beautiful. - He's a valid member of the team now. - I'm gonna take one
back for 70p, you know? - And guess what? He's gonna pay you in different ways. [Sidemen laugh] - Do I have sh*t in my beard? - No, man. - No, no sh*t in your
beard, just a sh*t beard. [sheep baaing] - That hurt. That hurt my feelings. - Hopefully they've done
some sh*ts by now out. - Josh has got some real
history with some faecal matter. - Yeah. - Josh knows his way around
some faecal matter, man. - Got a new one coming. - This is.
- Is that a little tube? - Yeah. Yeah. Poo tubes. That's what you guys
are famous on, isn't it? Poo-tube? - Yeah. [laughs] - That's pretty good. - Oh, one's just pooed. That one's pooed.
- Ones pooing right now. - Quick, while it's warm.
- Yeah. - I'll go get it quick, run.
- While it's still wet. - Rubber up. - I gotta squeeze it. Squeeze it. - When you're picking your nose tonight, you'll be able to smell it for hours. - He picks his own bum, it's fine. - Or do you have staff for that? [Sidemen laugh] - Honestly, give it a few months. - Few more hits.
- You never know. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This might be the golden goose, eh? - So what, do I just like what? - Yeah, get in.
- Grab it? Grab his arse?
- And put it in the tube. - There was poo just around here. - Right in middle, right
in there, right in there. - In the mixer there's sh*t. - Right in the middle, there's poo. - Where?
- Right in the middle. - Forward, forward, forward. It's like pushed in those. - Oh, I see it. - Dive in, dive in, dive in
and get some of that sh*t. - Yeah. - Fresh. - Pick it up, nice and.
- Pick it up - Get your hands in there. - Yeah.
- Yeah boys. - There we go, baby. - I don't trust him with a
handful of sh*t, you know. - Oh, it's warm. - Of course.
- It's fresh. - It's just come out of an asshole. - Bro, take out the grass. [Sidemen laugh] This is what I'm saying,
I didn't trust him. - Stick it in the tube.
- No grass please. - No grass.
- One lump or two? [Sidemen groan] - Have another nugget.
- Stick a couple in there. - Two nuggets. - Let the lamb know you care about them. - Sling that one 'cause we don't wanna pick
up the same one again. [Sidemen laugh] Pick up another fresh one. - Move boys. - Find me some blow. - I need some sh*t. - Is there not some right behind you? - Find me some sh*t. - That sounds like the
lines of one of your songs. [Sidemen laugh] - I wanna cuddle one of them. - Cuddle one. Cuddle
away, they don't mind. - Wait, can I pick one up? - Yeah, if you wanna pick one up. You won't squeeze the
sh*t out of it though. - Hello. - Pick up a little one.
- He's trying to pick one up. - Why are you making this so hard? - Well, hello fella. - Oh wow. - Oh, look at the camera. - Front page. Vegan monthly. - Aw, that's cute. - Whoa. - Like f*cking yeeted it up bro. - Look at that. Hold it like a child. - Why are you holding his leg apart? - He's trying to get his sh*t. - He's trying to show his nuts off. - Oh, he he literally just shat. - Oh sh*t, poo.
- Quick grab it. - He just shat.
- Get that. - Aw, he stepped on the sh*t. - That's all right. Pick it up, we don't mind
footprints in the sh*t. - JJ, we don't have all day. - Yeah, well, I'm try... Do you wanna do this? - I think you've gotta get down low. - No your the man for the job. - Hands and knees. - Hands and knees, you'll be fine. - Hands and knees, yeah,
get some sh*tty knees. - Hands and knees and get
down there and find it. - JJ, be the sheep.
- Get in it. - Be the sheep, be the sheep. - Oh wait, wait, wait, I see one. - You said you saw sh*t. - Yeah, but then they all stepped on it. - Let me have a look, let me have a look. Is there poo down there? - It's not there, bro,
it's under the grass. Look right there.
- What's that? - Oh he's seen one. - Brother.
- He trotted in it. [Sidemen laugh] - He likes you, he wants to get you back. - You got it.
- There we go. - Pick up sh*t. - Yes. - Grass, grass, grass, grass. - No, no, no. - Get the grass off.
- Contaminating the sample. - Yeah. Yeah.
- Now push that through. - Good boy, poke it in. - That's a big lump. - Look at that.
- Look at it smearing. - Still steaming.
- Nice. - You pushed it in. - Well done, man. Well done. - Good stuff, JJ. - Right, let's let these out. - Cuddle, cuddle. Yay. Cuddle, cuddle. Hey, how you doing? - Look, he likes you. - It's cute, look at him. - Be free. - Run my pretties. - Go.
- Go on then. There we go. - Run, run. Stampede. [Sidemen cheering]
[imitating trumpet] - They are rapid.
- They got major hops. - Now you can find all the turds. - You think you can take all of them? - Yes.
- They f*cking you up. - Every single one?
- Fam. Leg kick, it's goodnight Irene. - That's one.
- Who the f*ck is Irene? - Yay. - Let's go. - We're shaving Johns head! - Can this be in the main video? - Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, right. Fire the cameras, everyone. - Basically, everyone said,
"oh, how much to do this, how much to do this." And they said, "how
much to save your head?" And John said a grand to get sheared. So he's getting a grand, but
he is getting his head sheared. - I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan. - Do not subscribe Side+. Don't do it, okay? Until Wednesday, it's gonna be 50% off. Now the problem is obviously
this would've been great, but the problem is I'm paying for it. I have to pay all the
revenue that gets lost. Please for the love of God,
do not subscribe to Side+. Don't do it. Thank you. Hit the link in the
description and use the code HUMBLEKSI for 50% off
but don't actually do it. [dramatic music] - He needs to sit down. - You gotta sit down.
- Sit down like a sheep. - Oh my god.
- Alex. - For f*ck sakes on your knees. - That's a serious thing as well. - If anything goes wrong, it was JJs idea. - Oh my god. - Just sent you the money, bro. - This is bad, this is bull.
- He's gonna lose his ear. - Oh no.
- You ready mate? [panicked screams] [Sidemen cheer] [clippers buzz] - Okay, stop. - That is so good. - There we go, that will do. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh my God. - Well, it's effective, you know. - That's the job. - Leave him with a Mr. Burns,
leave him with a Mr. Burns. [clippers buzzing]
[loud clapping] - Oh my.
- Oh we love it. - I think he actually looks better though. I'm not even going to. - Yeah, he actually does look better. - John, I think you look better. - Yeah, you look kinda sick. - Oh, it's not nice. - This is what. - It's not nice. - You can leave random bits, don't worry. - When you go to your barber and ask for a little bit off the top. [Sidemen laugh] - You're nearly done. - Leave this, leave that.
Leave that. Leave that. [Sidemen laugh] [Sidemen clap] - Oh, you know what though? It actually looks good. - You look good.
- You look good with it short. Easiest grand ever. [Sidemen laugh] [camera crew laughs] It looks sick, you know. - That bit doesn't look good.
- I just got sheared. [Sidemen laugh] - I just got sheared. [laughs] - You've just been sheared. [KSI laughs] - You just got mugged. [laughs] - You just got sheared mate. [Sidemen laugh] - He's gonna go up to his kid, "Daddy. [Sidemen laugh] Your not my dad." - Why does the helmet fit like that? - It is massive. - Maybe as you get
older your head shrinks. - I don't think so. I think
I just born with a big head. - Had to get a bigger mask. [Sidemen laugh] - Custom built mask.
- That mask was huge. f*cking hell. - Bro goes to Toscos, he goes, "you got a bigger screen mask?" [Sidemen laugh] - Whats he hiding in there? Like what is it? [Sidemen laugh] [Sidemen laugh] - The back of his neck is out. - My friend, zoom in on the head. [Sidemen laugh] - Hey.
- Its so big. - It doesn't go further in. - Safety first guys, safety first. [Sidemen laugh] - With the dungarees
you look like a minion. [Sidemen laugh] - Like a minion? - Does the strap go around or not? - No. [Sidemen laugh] I might strangle myself in a process. - Oh, you boys were peak. You were so excited to quad bike and now you're bullying him. - If you're laughing JJ, why
don't you put it on and see? - No, no. - Come on, put it on, lets see. - No, no, no, don't get
touchy, don't get touchy. [Sidemen laugh] - Buddy, my ears are f*cking in pain, bro. [Sidemen laugh] - They're not gonna be on your ears. They're gonna be on your cheek down there. - You gotta talk to the
top of your head for that. [Sidemen laugh] - You see the thing where the visor is? You see where the visor is? That's gonna be his ears. [Sidemen laugh] [KSI coughing] - I'm gonna have to start driving, man. It'd be like Toad out Mario Kart. [Sidemen laugh] - Lay this fence down bro. - Lay some fence down, G. - Oh yeah. - That's the guy she tells
you not to worry about. - Oh, he's doing it. - This is gonna be the worst f*cking fence the world has ever seen. - Yeah. - Right, he's going further. - Not sure that helmet was
needed for this kind of speed. [Sidemen laugh] The real danger in life. - This is high octane farming. Some might call it extreme farming. - Simon do extreme farming. [laughs] We've just got dressed up in a field. - We've been watching. Look at the distance
between all the others. - Yeah and he's got double that. - Yeah, that's great. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh, how'd he survive it? How'd he survive that? - f*cking. - He's got a bad leg.
- Oh he's dying now. - Oh, no. Oh no. - Oh no, now we've killed him. - Oh no. Anyway, how's the fence going? [Sidemen laugh] - Can we talk about what
the f*ck this guy's doing? - I've seen worse fences in my time. - Look at the middle one. - He's gonna drive into the wilderness. - The helmet looks so funny still. - He looks like someone
from "Hills have Eyes." [Sidemen laugh] - Well that'll be a fun game.
- What? - Grab a bit of grass and
see how much you're gonna, can it hold the full body weight of me? It can, that's pretty cool. Someone try it. [Sidemen laugh] - You know what, I'll humour you. - Go on. So you'll be fine then, yeah, yeah, yeah. - It can hold bugs, it can hold Vik. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. See. - It can hold more than that. - Grass is strong you know. - Wait, so, wait, let me... No, you hold it and I'll hold onto you. - Then we're both going.
- Let's add weight. - You're both going down I'm sure of it. - That's nuts. - No, no. - That wasn't the grass. - Grab lower down.
- Alright. - Create a chain, a Sidemen chain. - Grab properly. [Sidemen laugh] - I'm not joining.
- Yeah. - Keep leaning, keep leaning. - No, it's good.
- Okay, grab on. - It's good. - No I don't want to
be at the end of that. - I dunno. - No, no, its not. - Oh sh*t. [Sidemen laugh] - I did not want them two on top of me. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh no, it was right in his cuff. - f*cking hell. - But it didn't even go. It was my grip strength that went before. - Is anyone even filming Josh or is he just doing it for fun? - I think he's just doing it for fun. - He's just doing it for fun. - No one's even filming him.
- Legit, no ones filming. - Well done, Josh. - Good fence bro.
- Yeah so well. [Sidemen clap] - Shining performance. - What a riveting piece of content. - Yeah, you said, you sacked yourself. [Sidemen laugh] - Its a really good fence. - So we're gonna fill the bowser up. - Bowser?
- Bowser, like the... - We've had f*cking. - So its like Toad and now its Bowser. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're using a bowser. - Okay. - We can fill that up. - Chris is sick of us already. [engine roars] - Any second now. [engine roars] - Harry, you've been given
a really important job here. - Waits, what's going on here?
- Need him to hold pipe. [Sidemen laugh] - Here he comes, oh yeah. - Hold it, hold that pipe. - Well, she's wild one. Oh no, its leaking. [panicked screams]
[Sidemen laugh] - Oh my god. - Cover it up.
- Tame the beast. - Cover it up.
- Cover it up. - Cover it. - There we go. - Sorry, you were a stooge it that. - Was that planned?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh you bastard. You bastard. - Oh. Why don't you feel the bowser? - It went straight. Straight into his crotch. - How funny this is that we're just all walking
to get back in here. We know our place. [Sidemen laugh] - Who wants to sit in
between my legs? Come on. Bro back, four ways. [Sidemen laugh] - Bro back, four ways. [laughs] - I love my colleagues. - That was good, that was. Respect. - Boy's get involved.
- What? Get where? - Yeah. Get inside. - Wanna sit in the wet patch? - I'll sit for Danny. - Come on, jump in then. - The f*ck? Whoa. - Yeah, there it is. Yeah. Yeah. [Sidemen laugh] - My boys. [Sidemen laugh] - I'm not sure if like it's a
porno or it's a murder film. - This could be the start of a porno. - Yeah right. - Get it going here. - No, no need for that. [Sidemen laugh] - Just us. [Sidemen laugh] - Anyone reckon they're gonna get a semi while stroking a udder? [Sidemen laugh] - I mean I might get one now,
you're rubbing up against me. - Yeah. [Sidemen laugh] - It f*cking honks around here. - We're in the cattle town now. Oh, these ones feel like, this is more of a nice
landscape to live in. - Yeah, this one can get behind. - Yeah, if I was a sheep,
I'd want to be in this field. - Oh my God. What is going on here? - Boys cattle.
- Oh wow. - Are we about to toss 'em all off? - I dunno.
- What? - f*cking hell
- Oh, look at them. - Bro, that ones head is stuck. - Oh, he's been shat on as well. - sh*t head. - To feed. - To feed, the second. - Hello fella, yeah, those are
serious creatures those are. - They are literally on a sea of sh*t. - Oh no!
- He got pooed on again. - No!
- sh*t man got pooed on. sh*t man got pooed on again. - That's horrid to see. - I saw that. - Aw, he looks embarrassed now as well. [Sidemen aw] - sh*t man. - Wait, I swear he's a bit erect. - That's not.
- That's a woman. - It is not.
- The f*ck is that? - That's its udder.
- Its an udder. - Oh. - That's what you've been making jokes about wanking off for the last. - Bro, bro, leave it. - Leave the cow alone you f*cking weirdo. - Did you think it had four cocks? - Yes bro, I was baffed,
I like what's going on? - That cow's got four dicks. [laughs] - Right, boys. So we're gonna run the
cows through the crush. We want to weigh them, make sure, it's called a crush, there's no squashing. - Okay, cool. - They feel safe in there
because it's enclosed. They don't feel like
we're gonna harm them. The idea is, we're weighing them just to see that they're in good condition to go to the bull. Which is where they'll
be going, not today, but the bull will be brought over in the next couple of weeks and he'll make merry with them. And then we'll have calves in the spring. This is Elsie, she's just lovely. - Yeah.
- Isn't she pretty? You can cuddle her. - Hello. She's quite full, is that all milk? - That's all grass.
- That's all grass? - Yeah, yeah, that's
all grass in her tummy. - Wow. Oh my God. - Bro, look, hug the cow. - Yeah, the cow's
lovely, no, no, you go... Don't look, don't look.
- No, JJ come hug the cow. - Don't, stay away from it. - I'm weighing with you. - Okay, you guys stay there. You guys have to guess. - No peeking, no peeking. - Gotta make a quick
punishment, like five press ups. And they all have a guess. - In the pen with all that sh*t in. - Yeah, yeah, over the sh*t. - So try to work out how
much that cow weighs. - In kilogrammes?
- Yeah, in kilogrammes. - 460. - I'd say about 108.
- Yeah? - A hundred and what?
- What? - A hundred and what, eight? - Nah, that's a joke, isn't it? - How much did you think that was? - No it was joke.
- Con was 115. - You think that weighs less than? - I think less than Con. - Just less than Ethan Bazinga
is worse. Don't you think? - That thing, that whole thing
was less than 216, bazinga. [KSI laughs] - You f*cking idiot. - I think it's about four. - Yeah, it's gotta be four
hundred and something, right? - Boys, we have a proposition for you. - Yeah. - We're gonna tell you
the weight of this one and then you all guess the next one. - Alright, benchmark cow. - And the loser. - Has to do press ups in the pen. - Oh, mate, that's not safe. - Have a guess at this one. - So he, he said 110.
- Okay. - No, no, no, no. - 110.
- What's your guess? What's your guess?
- 380 kilogrammes. - Oh, I wanna say 442. - Okay. I'm saying 460. Yeah, 485. - Alright, well Ethan, you got the point. It's 770. [blows raspberry] - It's seven 770 kilogramme? - 770. - f*cking hell. - You big beast. - She's a Beaut. - Up next. - Single cow, reveal yourself. - I'm going for 805.
- 805. - Oh so you think that
ones bigger than that one? - Next guess, Josh. - I think that one's
smaller than last one. So I wanna say it was 720.
- Alright. - 804. - What did you say?
- 805. - Josh is through. - What was it?
- 700. - 700 on the nose. - Yes, let's go, I'm through, I'm safe. - Next cow. - Oh, it's sh*tting. [KSI screams] - It weighs less now. - It weighs less.
- Oh crumbs. - Okay that actually.. - It's down to 500. - Oh, he's talking duces. - Vikkstar, get ready to do your pushups. - Let's hear the guess. - 720.
- 720, he's gone for. - That leaves me in a position to say 721. - 721. The loser is... Vikkstar. - Yes!
- It's 650. - Yes, yes!
- That's a lightweight cow. - What cows are you looking at? - They're smaller. - I'm not good at gauging
the size of a cow. - How's my moo? [imitates cow mooing] - I'll give it a three out of ten. - All right, all right, let me improve. [imitates cow mooing] - Two now. - They not even chatting back to you. - There we go. [imitates cow mooing] [Sidemen laugh] - They're all just going through now. - They're getting free exit now. - Yeah, f*ck, I'm sure they weigh enough. - Harry, what's a cow's
favourite method of transport? - Oh, the moo. - The utter-ground. - That's a good one. - That's a good one. - What'd you say are the bravest cows? - The what? - The moo. [Sidemen laugh] - The dairy cows. [Sidemen groan] - Ah, really good. - That was actually a pretty good one. - What do cows and your
mother have in common? - What? - They've both been fisted by a farmer. [Sidemen laugh] - Really good. [Sidemen laugh] That's really good, yeah. [Sidemen laugh] - I dunno if it gets better than that. - I think we've reached it. [Sidemen laugh] - I've gotta go do my pushups. - Game over. - Get your f*cking pushups done. - All right, what is it? How many? 10? - 10, 10, 10, 10. - If you wanna do more, you can. - Yeah, like. - All right. No, it smells bad for here. - Nose to poo please. - Nose to poo. [laughs] - Actually chest to the floor. - Come on Vik. - What if his hands slip? [Sidemen laugh] [Sidemen groan] - One. One. One. One. One. One.
- Lower, lower. One. One. - How many?
- Nine, ten. - That's enough Vik, that's enough. - All right, lower. Do some mounting climbers. - Claps. - One clap.
- One clap. - Bro, why are you still doing press ups? - One clap. - I thought about,
imagine I clap with that. Who wants?
- No, no, no, no. - Friends, friends. - No colleges. [Sidemen laugh] - Stay away.
- No! [Sidemen laugh] - This is like a super pile bro. [laughs] Naturally. [KSI laughs] - Send it home. - These are the best
gloves I've ever worn. They're like anti Sidemen gloves. - Stop scaring your colleagues. [Sidemen laugh] - You know what I love about a farm? You've gotta be nice, you gotta introduce yourself
to everything on the farm. - Yeah.
- Go on then. - Hey bales. [Sidemen laugh] - Ah, really good. Really good. - Should I get a clap? You know what, this really
was supposed to be a forfeit, but it's given me a superpower. I'm gonna have so much room
in the back of the trailer. Back in the dingle with sh*t hands. - Now Vik, you gotta wash your hands. You gotta wash your hands. - Should I come and get cosy? - No way! [Sidemen laugh] - Nice and cosy. I've got sh*t on my dungarees too. - Oh, no, no, no. - I'll sit here.
- Oh, they do smell. - When we first was in here,
we chose to sit like this. - Let's go, Tobi, let 'em know. - Yeah! Come on. - We are about to do...
- You can do this! - A welly toss.
- Oh wow. [Sidemen laugh] To decide the one person. - Yes! - Who can ride the tractor. First up.
- Let Harry go, he's been desperate. - Yeah, Harry's been dying. - Get it in there.
- Go on bug. - Oh yeah.
- Oh great. - Harry's the reason with
this back by the way. - Leave it there. A bit more of a flick and you'll be fine. - This is goal. - Oh my God, yes! - It's just going straight up in the air. - Who wants to go next? - I'm gone. I'm going bro. Here. - Simon's gonna do it. It's a very Simon thing to do. [Sidemen oo] - The poor tractor. - Simon's still it. [Sidemen oo] - You did give it some welly. - He's over shot it.
- Go on JJ. - Oh no. [Sidemen aw] [Sidemen oo] - I guess they got some welly in there. [Sidemen laugh] - Why wouldn't you just put it on? Why wouldn't you just wear it? - Oh my gosh. - JJ, you're already doing it wrong. You gotta like flick forwards that. - You gotta get your foot forward. [Sidemen oo] [Sidemen cheer] - That's not in though. - No, he said if it doesn't
go back to the ground, it counts. - There's no way I'm
beating that, Simone wins. - You're winning. [Sidemen oo] [Sidemen aw] - My foot is f*cking soggy. [Sidemen oo] [Sidemen aw] - How'd you get it to go forwards? - My foot is so wet. - Bez has got trench foot. - f*cking hell. [Sidemen laugh] - No, we'll get this,
someone will get this. - Harry will do it, Harry. - Do we have spare socks? [Sidemen scream] [Sidemen cheer] - You've won a tractor. - Harry's won a tractor. - Harry's our tractor driver. - All right, shall I drive this beast? - What? No "your mom" joke
in there, that's crazy. - We've aged. - And plus you don't drive
his mum, you ride it. [Sidemen laugh] - I don't really wanna stand here when he's behind the wheel of that. - Should we play last one standing? - Let's play chicken. - Chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken. - No, he has to just catch us. - He has to catch us with that. - Yeah. - Pretty sure that might kill us. - No, we would die.
- That's the game. - Losers loose.
- Yeah. - Winners win.
- Winner makes it to Simons. - All right, you hop up in there. - Alright, let's get it. [tractor hums] Okay, nice. - We'll take the handbrake off. - Okay.
- And then just slowly, away we go. - Oh, there he comes. - Yeah! - Oh sh*t, he's awake. - Oh yes. [Sidemen laugh]
- f*cking hell. Look at him go. - That moves. - Whip an excursion. - Chris is just leading him away. - Chris is gonna have his way with him. [Sidemen giggles] - He did say he pays in another ways. - See you are a natural man. - There's a serious bit
kick, this is, come on. - So we want to go down the gear so it's just as simple as that. - I don't have to use a clutch fan though? - No, no.
- Oh wow. - She's clutchless.
- Alright. - Like the best kind of girls. - My neck. - He just goes over, his like, "great work today, Harry." [giggles] [Sidemen laugh] - One hand on the wheel,
one hand on the back. [Sidemen laugh] - Harrys having the time
of his life right now. He's gripping your thigh. [Sidemen laugh] - What we're gonna do
is do some topping, so. - Okay. - This thing over here,
you can press it and away. That'll start the engine up. We press red for it to go down and then I'll just set it the
height so it's not too low otherwise it would just be, hang on. - And that's gonna clear all these. - Yeah, so you just want to drive up here and then make a straight line towards it. - My favourite part is that
none of these are real jobs that need doing. [Sidemen laugh] - Well done man. - Game's a game. - Sidemen do pointless on a farm. - Yes. - Yes. - f*ck them thistles up. - How you liking it?
- Yeah, this is sick. - You can take your foot
off the clutch if you like. - Serious waggon and then. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Time to start turning right now. - Okay. Oh, we are off to the races. Oh yeah. I'm clearing a right old path. So what is this? Is this weeds and stuff? - So head for a straight line. - That's actually quite cool. - It's quite satisfying. - Yeah. [soft giggles] - So it's just kind of driving, really. - You gotta enjoy the simple things, man. [Sidemen laugh] You just gotta enjoy the simple things. - Simon needs to take it back to basics. - You haven't currently got a Vito and a Ren Ru behind you as well? [Sidemen laugh] - Hey, change the angel real quick. [Sidemen laugh] - We need that in the background? - Yeah, yeah.
- Shuffle, shuffle, yeah. - Humble beginnings. [Sidemen laugh] - Well, we had a farm. Well, I had a farm today. - There's sheep, I've
gotta avoid the sheep. - Yeah, yeah, they'll move,
just go slightly wide. - They'll move? - Yeah, yeah, they'll move.
- I hope so. - Yeah. Give 'em a. [horn beeps] They'll get out your way. How are you liking this?
- This is great. They can just roam anywhere. - Yeah. Yeah.
- Oh wow. - They're allowed in here. - This is really something. That's a dodgy looking line, I'm sorry. - Yeah, yeah, its fine. - You're about as straight as a drunk man. - That's a disgraceful line. - Wait, are those sheep quite close? - Yeah. - He's gonna churn 'em up into kebab. - Lamb kofta.
- Kofta. [Sidemen laugh] - Can I move that thing a little bit? - If you kind of pull that towards you, it'll get it up in the air. - Oh wow. - No, this is supreme. [laughs] Premium content. - We're gonna do dung
fork work in a minute. - Can we do something else? - But I've never watched
"Clarkson's Farm." - It is really good.
- Is it? - I actually have, I have watched it. - And it is this.
- And it is this. - Literally is this. - Oh, so we're smashing at then. - I think he's funnier than us. [Sidemen laugh] - Gimme odds right now,
of you picking up that and throwing it at Harry when he gets out. - I'll do it.
- Alright. [Sidemen laugh] I'll do it. [Sidemen clapping] - Yay. - Wow.
- Really well done mate. - Thank you.
- When he's close. - I'm gonna miss. - No, when he's like here. - Don't hit Chris. [Sidemen laugh] - Is that like an extra large lawnmower? - This one is, yeah. - I just didn't want you to be in the way. [Sidemen laugh] - That was it, that was it. [Sidemen laugh] - I was like, you know, if
you're gonna assault me, I'd commit to it a bit.
- No I didn't. [Sidemen laugh] - Yeah you were gonna go. - He said, I didn't wanna assault you 'cause if its that hard... - We were expecting it to splatter. - Yeah, its quite hard poo, I think. - Oh, I've got a game for us. That bit of dung there. You know when we all line
up and we spin a bottle, whoever the bottle lands on
then like picks up the dung and everyone starts a sprint away and then they throw the dung at some. Yeah, with that. [bottle thuds] - Where's the poo? Take the poo. [panicked scream] [Sidemen laugh] - Okay, we'll go again. - So Tobi, you're the judge. - I'll call out who it is. [bottle thuds] That's you, Harry.
- That's not me. That's not me.
- sh*t, sh*t. [panicked screams] [KSI screams] - It got me! [KSI screams] I've got poo on me! I've got poo on me! [KSI screams] f*ck! - You didn't go anywhere. - There's poo on my... Is there poo on my back? - Oh yeah, you do here. [Sidemen laugh] - Bro, he didn't run. He was there. - I thought it was me! - It was clearly him. - He's got sh*t on his back. [laughs] - He's got a poo stain here. [Sidemen laugh] - Well, if it helps, it means
you get to drive the tractor. - Yeah! - What?
- That's the game. - Poo man.
- You won. [Sidemen clap] - You're picking up poo
now because you're poo man. - Oh great. Oh, brilliant. - We need to think of a game. - Where are we putting the poo? - Oh he just volunteered himself. - Do we just get started? - Yeah, jump straight
and jump straight in. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Get stuck in lad. - Alright, so for the other
two, we'll play a game. - John, I would move from there. You're in poo zone John. [Sidemen laugh] - Can I introduce you
to some actual content? - Yeah, go on.
[Sidemen laugh] - Come on, come have a look at this. Come look at this. We start back here and it's just a race to the top of those two hay bales there. - Don't mind me. Just cleaning up some sh*t. The sh*t of a cow. Clean it off. - JJ.
- Yeah? - Can you just shout the
word "go" when you want. - Do a count. - All right. [upbeat country music] - Wait, so to top up to where he is? - Yeah. On top of those two hay bails. - Okay. [spade scrapes] - Isn't like he wants to, he's not ready. - Is he gonna say go ever? [Sidemen laugh] - We should just go. - No, let him start the counter. [Sidemen laugh] [spade scrapes] [KSI groans] - All right, let's go. - sh*t. [Sidemen laugh] [Sidemen laugh] - I'm up. I'm up. [Sidemen laugh] - Okay, I'll go and scoop. [Sidemen laugh] - How many people are left? - What's happening down there? - Yeah, so Ethan just sacked it, I think. - That's Josh. - This is a vibe. - Oh wait, oh wow.
- Where's Josh? - No, they're already doing it. [KSI laughs] - You gotta make it up here. - Okay, I'll come to you guys. - Wanna shovel and chuck it at 'em. - Yeah true, actually. - Sorry I'm blind, I
can't see, I've got poo. - Not their face though.
- No, not near me please. - Oh, fell on my ears. - It's quite sick up here. I can't lie. - Yeah, this is cool. - This is a little spot. - So we just chill up
here while they scoop poo? - Yeah.
- Under. Bro said he knew a spot. - Boys, you guys have won.
- Yeah. - It's actually quite fun up here. - It's quite nice.
- You can come up. - Really?
- Come up. - Did you just throw poo at us? - Yeah, but you missed. - They're quite high up. - This is riveting though this. - God, look at that poo man, yeah. Poo. [shovel scrapping] Poo. Big lumpy green poo. Oh that's a good dollop. - That's a big one bro. [shovel scrapping] - Geez. - What day. When do we go to your house? - We don't.
- When do we get down? - When I'm certain he's
not gonna throw poo at us. - He's gonna throw poo at us. - Should we light a match or something? [group laughs] - That could be a bit of... - That would add to the video. - That would add to the video. - I'm gonna get down. [shovels scrape] - We haven't move much of it. - Oh god. [Sidemen laugh] - Oh, Viks a sitting duck. Viks a sitting duck. [Sidemen laugh] Viks like a deer in headlights. - High ground is safe. I've never climbed a hay
bail so fast in my life. - Did you get him? - No, no, no, no. - But he looked like deer in headlights. - Terrified. - Now, now boys. I see you're labouring
away hard at the poo. I've had a better idea. - Yeah? - I'll use my newly
acquired tractor skills. - Oh, please do. - Oh sh*t, there's a tractor. - How did that get here? [Sidemen laugh] - Oh, f*ck this off.
- Oh, f*ck me. - Yeah, just move this out of the way. - An animal. - Okay.
- All right. - Back in the seat.
- Back in the waggon. - All right, so, oh,
I'll just get the key. - There's a key here. - Key and a bullet.
- And a bullet, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what happened to the
last person that had the key. - Oh no. [laughs] [shovel scrapes] - What's going on? [group laughs] - What the f*ck? [Sidemen laugh] What's going on man? Have a look, I'm gonna line Vik
up here, all right, so look. He's just a sitting duck, look. Here, ching bang wullup. [Sidemen laugh] - Did you hit him? - That could have been bad. - Do I just like drive into the poo? - Yeah, yeah, drive into the poo, gently. - Oh my God. - Keep going, keep going,
keep going, keep going. You got it, right, now. - Okay. Oh god. - That's it, sorry, it's out of gear now. Shut the mouth of the thing. - Oh, look, it grabs it. - Nicely. And stop and pull towards you. So that's lifting it and
kind of just bring it. - Yeah, I feel like what
if he drops it on our head? - Nice.
- Yeah. - So then if you want to back
up and then drive to there so you can dump it from
a height if you want. So, whoa, whoa, that's enough height. - Okay. [laughs] - That's it, you've got it, you've got it. - Mind out boys. - Okay, so you can go forwards
now and head for the pile. - Where's he taking the sh*t? Wow. That smells bad. - God, it stinks. - JJs brave, you know. - That's it, yeah, yeah, whoa. - Oh no.
- Now, now, press the button and open her up. - Yeah.
- Yeah, boy. - Yes.
- That's it. - You. - Yay. Poo-poo. Poo-poo. Poo-poo, poo-poo. Yeah, poo-poo. - He was so close.
- Poo-poo, yeah. - So close. - That was so close. [Sidemen laugh] - I almost stacked it. - I would've loved to see him stack it. [Sidemen laugh] - Man said "poo-poo"
and he was so serious. - Well, what's next? - Why Josh? What's what's next? [Sidemen laugh] - Give us an envelope. [KSI laughs] - What happened to your glove? - Poo melted it or something.
- Poo melted it. - Uranium poop. Oh my God, here we go guys. I just got text from the
video organiser, Josh Zerkaa. "This video isn't going
as well as it should. So let's do what Harry's mom
does and handle some wood." [Sidemen groan] Yes, back in the trailer boys. [KSI laughs] - That celeb would've been f*cking. - Logan Paul is jumping through ladders and JJ is jumping in poo. - Poo-poo. - All right, boys. - Yes.
- Hello. - Hello mate. - I need you to do work for me mate. Can you put all these... - What's going on? Are you telling us? - Yeah, you're doing it for us. I work for the farm now. - What are we doing?
What are we doing? What? - Load up the trailer with some nice wood that we can chop up. [log thuds] Geez. [log thuds] - Oh, go on Vik. [log thuds] - Who can do the coolest log trick? Right, you ready? This is my log trick. [upbeat music] [log thuds]
- Oh, the fade away. [Sidemen laugh] - My hip. [log thuds] - Under the leg. - No! - That be enough for me. - Yeah?
- Yeah. - We need to do like Mr. Beasts keywords. So you just gotta be like, "I can't wait to get to the other side." - Literally, that's
what you gotta do, yeah. - Wonder what the guys in
the trailer are thinking. This is a crazy trailer
that we are riding. Josh don't go too fast. - Whoa. - Are you ready lads, to performance mode. - Oh God. - You put in in performance mode? - I'm gonna roll. - Yeah, I put it in performance mode to make sure we can really get going. - We look like we're about to
do country band, like, album. - Oh. I shagged my cousin in a farm. And then she had my child. - There we go. - Performance mode. - Yes. - Wow. This is crazy, Josh.
- Oh my word. - Whoa. - Slow down Josh. - Can't see past's his head. - That's not very nice. - I got some wood in my eyes. - Want to throw a bit of wood at him? - What is that piece? [engine hums]
[piano music] It's under his arse hole now.
- Yeah. - Sit on that. - Get that wood in your arse hole. - Yeah, Josh's sitting on wood. [laughs] - Oh no. - Oh, nice. - So, I'm gonna sh*t him
up, you ready for this? [wood thuds]
- Oh wow, scary. - Yeah, I made him jump. - There we go, he's gonna
boot John at the face. - Wow.
- Oh sh*t. - Come yet. [laughs] - That was dreadful. - Oh, hello?
- Oh wow. - Vik, they got an axe for you. - All right, JJs first. - Show 'em how it's done bro. - We all vote. - All right, we vote.
- One chop each. - Loser gets red arsed by the winner. - Is this all included in
the vote or this bravado? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all part of it.
- No, no, no. - No games. - Because we need to be finished today. - He's doing it for himself anyway, so. - Because he's lost. - He's being a TikTok guy. He's doing a TikTok thing. [Sidemen laugh] - Poo-poo, yay, poo-poo. - He should be good at this because they do this in training. - Oh. - No, no man. - This is nuts. - I don't like it.
- Stop. - One swing, remember? - I think he's gonna be good at this. - I reckon he's gonna slay. - Yeah, I think quality. - I think he misses.
- It's actually quality. - What if he actually takes
like a finger off or something? - That's on him.
- He's gonna miss. - Oh God.
- Dunno if he knows technique. - Don't hit your leg please. [loud bang] [Sidemen cheer] - Nah, that was quality.
- Whoa. [Sidemen clap] - All right, that was sick. - That was on the nail.
- That was sick. [Sidemen clap] - I can't believe I just
f*cking did that. [laughs] - Whoa, wow. - Bro, that was one of the sickest things I've seen in my life.
- Holy f*cking sh*t. - That's getting TikTok edited. - That was so sick. [KSI laughs] Now, now I'm turned on from before. [KSI laughs] Oh he's got a thick one. - Oh he's got a thick boy. - f*cking hell. - Are we taking it into
account? Like the size of it? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll factor that in. - He's got a big thing.
- That's a big boy. - If he does the same thing
with that, he's more impressive. - Hold it, yeah, yeah, if you get this, this is definitely more impressive. - Okay. [loud exhale] - Oh, what's he gonna do? - Oh, I don't like it. [log cracks] [Sidemen claps] - It was good.
- But not quite as clean. - Not quiet as KSI. - No, no, no, it's clean. - He broke the axe. [KSI gasps] - Oh, he broke the axe.
- Oh wow. - I'll get you a new axe, I'm sorry. - Harry gets red arsed then. - That's the loser and that's the winner. - You've lost. That is unfortunate. - That was cold though. - That was sick. - I mean, that's even more powerful. - Nah, yours was better. - And he wants yours back right? - Its like, look at the shape of that. - Yeah, it's incredible. Yours was like nuts.
- Oh fair. - I snapped the axe,
I feel really bad now. - You should try a small axe. - Yeah, this is definitely
splitting nothing. - Doesn't matter. - I feel like I'm instantly
gonna lose here now. - I got you bro. You get two swings now. - No, one swing.
- Nah, one swing. - We're getting together. - It's just gonna be stuck inside it. - Do I have to do this?
- One swing? - Yeah.
- Yeah. - This is really intimidating 'cause I know this is gonna look arb. - No, you'll do it, you'll do it. - We're all doing it after
you anyways, it's fine. - You go, you go. - Jeez. [axe thuds] [Sidemen laugh] - No, no, no, no, no, no. - You got one go only. - Maybe just leave it. - Surely you just use the same wood. - Enjoy.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. [KSI laughs] - Do you know what, if it gets hit enough. - Go on.
- Yeah. - It doesn't look like its gonna. - Yeah, nice fellas. - Does look as good man. - Don't know.
- No. Much smaller. - Oh no. - Oh god. - Imagine you go to the
bedroom and he's luring you in. - Wait no, its not a tomahawk. - Bro. - Come on then. Chop it. [axe thuds] - Oh my god, he just missed. - No, no, no, no, no,
brother, brother, brother. - Don't use that again. - Get away from the.... You just nearly took your shin off. - I put my leg to the side. - All I gotta do is hit it to beat Josh. - Yeah, well, don't do what josh did. - Whatever you do, just don't. [axe thuds] - Really good.
[Sidemen cheer] - He's left it in there, he's left it in. - Go Tobi, use all the power you got. [axe thuds]
[Sidemen oo] - No, no, its Vik.
- Where you going? It's Vik. - Bro, it's not even you next. - Bro, its not you bro. - Then it's him. - It's Vik and then its back to me. - Oh true, I get excited. - If I have to. - Go Vikkstar. I think Vikkstar gonna split it. - If he hits the same bit, he splits it. - Splits it?
- Yeah. - Look at this.
[axe thuds] [Sidemen oo] - That was some venom in that one yeah. - You can see where it starts to split. - Bro, anytime. - He has to put his legs to the one side. - He wants it, he wants it. [axe thuds] - Bro, you hit that the same. - That was at the breaking. - Who's letting him back near an axe? - Bro, he missed. [Sidemen shouting] - He's so excited to go. [axe thuds]
- Better. - Great.
- It wasn't better. - Bro stop man. [Sidemen yell] - Stop! - It's more dent in it, we need more. - This is like, you know, like you. This is like the... [Sidemen cheer] - All right, so Josh lost. - Yeah.
- He lost. - No, you missed, you missed a lot. - You nearly took off the limb. - You lost. [Sidemen arguing together] - If anything he won because
he was so powerfully broke axe. - I wanna see more axe chopping. - Yeah but.
- He found it to hard. - Yeah, well, I'd like to see him try. If he misses this, then its done. - All right, we will give you one go. - Redemption. - One go. - I'm gonna hit myself. - One shot at redemption. You don't want pressure on the big guy. - Why the f*ck did you use
one hand on the first one? That was crazy. - He nearly took his leg off. - I dunno where that axe will go. - He might just let go of the axe. - If we temp to fate it
or could we lose a friend? So wait, what, what does
he have to do to win? - It's gotta be a clean break
- Clean break. - Bro.
- Oh my God. - That technique wasn't it.
- That's it, its done. - I didn't wanna go for it. - Its done, its done.
- He's terrified. - Harry's turn, Harry's turn.
- Okay. - You gotta hold an axe like this on you and then when you get to here, then... - No, no, no, no, no, no. - Give Harry the axe, bro. - Give Harry the axe.
- Give Harry the axe. - Wait your turn! - I think it's, yeah. - Ready to go? - That's your swing. [axe thuds] [Sidemen clap] - What a man, what a man. [Sidemen laugh] - What a man.
- What a man. [KSI laughs] - I almost wanna sleep with KSI though. [Sidemen laugh] That was insane. [KSI laughs] That was insane. - All right, you need to
get red arsed my friend. - Start in the barn and run out. [Sidemen laugh] Do a sexy dance out the barn. - No.
- Poo-poo. - Do a sexy dance out the barn? - He's gone back there. - Oh my days. - Josh just turned around bro. - Can I go? - Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah. - Go!
- Go, go, go. - He looks more submissive
in the dungarees somehow. [ball thuds]
[Sidemen oo] - That was clean. - What a shot. - That was great. - You're important today. - That was like perfectly there. - f*cking hell. - Josh enjoyed it.
- I felt that. - It is time for cider. - What do you wanna talk about lads? - How long reckoning you'd last on a farm? - I'd say about two minutes. - You've whole day though. - You'd be a good worker, man. You'd be class. - Why's that Harry? - 'Cause he's the only one that could chop a f*cking long of wood. - Yeah, you know what,
yeah, I like your thinking. - I'll be the driver.
- You'd be finished. You're Lenny. No you're not even Lenny 'cause you can't even chop the wood. [Sidemen laugh] - You two are the Lenny's. - Okay.
- So then we would be like, I'd be like a driver on the tractor. You can drive tractor too. - No, you can't even do that, man. - We saw the fence bra.
- Yeah. [Sidemen laugh] - Never anything positive to say. - You made the helmet look bigger. - Never anything positive to say. - That's a positive.
- No it's not. - Why? It is a positive for Josh. Normally he makes banging videos. [Sidemen laugh] - Normally.
- His backhanded compliment. [Sidemen laugh] - For f*ck sake. - All right, without Josh, the Sidemen wouldn't have existed. How about that?
- There you go. [Simone laughs] - What else can we burn, man? There must be something we can burn. [Sidemen laugh] Oh, hang on a minute. - I hear drinks. - I hear the jingle of a. - Of a bevvy. - Of happiness in bottle form. - A cold bevvy. - Vikkstar ecstatic again. - What are these here? These are? - Just a little thank you for the coming and helping me today.
- Oh nice. - We should be thanking you. - Do we deserve a thank you? - We don't deserve a thank you. [Sidemen laugh] - I think like should be
giving you the thank you. - You made a mess but
you've been a great help. You've been a good bunch of lads. - Thank you.
- So got some ciders. - Dig in, yeah.
- Are these grown here? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, serious?
- That looks delicious. - Glad we have all these
cameras to capture this moment. - Where was the joke bro? - Camera, block camera. - We block camera too. - It's a camera per person. - Hello. - I'm not doing anything. - This is like the mukbang we did. - This is our POV. [Sidemen laugh] This is what we see all the time. - Out in nature. - Can I put my hat in there? - If you want to.
- Just one. - Just don't put all in there otherwise. - Oh my god, I don't want them. Do you wanna put one on
the for the knife in? - That's quite...
- The wooden knife. - On the wooden knife. - Yes, try that.
- Nice. - Will it cook?
- No. - What are you doing?
[Sidemen laugh] - What's he done? - Hang on, it's funny. - It was hot, it was hot.
- Relax. - Yes. - Oh no, it touched the floor to long. - Its touched the floor like three times. - Well eat it then. - It's bubbling. - That's gonna be banging, you know. [Sidemen laugh] - So verdict, is it good? - Mortifying.
- Mortifying? - Let me try one, I want to try it. - It's got smoke to it. - Oh my god, that's enough bro. - That's enough.
- That's good yeah. - That's gonna taste. [Sidemen laugh] - That's gonna be good, mate. - Oh yeah. - Mortifying or? - Oh, it's not great. [Sidemen laugh] Not that bad, not that bad. - How you gonna balance this? What's going on? - Wait, whoa, isn't it hot? What's wrong with you then?
- Use your gloves. - But that's why you put, you put your hand directly above it, you put your hand to the side, like that. - Squashy kofta.
- Wanna try? [Sidemen laugh] - Could I have some
actual squashies please? - Yeah. - Its all right. It's not great. - Squashy. - Oh, oh, you know what? It's all right, it's alright.
- It's alright. - No, no. - Try that one. - I dunno how I feel about it. - Try that one.
- No, actually. - A squash-sheesh-kebab. - We not got some velcros, we go. - Why don't you add some cider? - I don't think cider does that. - It's actually a lot nicer than the. - Oh it does. - No it doesn't, it just puts it out. - You got 'em lads. - Oh my. - Oh that is nice. - Oh, it's actually going as well. - Oh wow.
- If we get close to that, it be a nice way to end
like with that like. - That would be great. - It's shrinking, - Uh-oh.
- That can't be healthy. - Oh no. [panicked chatter] - Oh God. Don't breathe, just don't breath. - Why would you do that?
- Oh, its really on fire. - Why would you do that? - Oh, it smells.
- Oh, she stinks. - Oh, that's toxins that is. - It looks cool though.
- Yeah. - There's black smoke coming off it. - What's wrong with that, Vik? [Sidemen laugh] - Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for us to bring you the first ever Sidemen store. [upbeat music] We're taking over the UK's most legendary
shopping destination. Bluewater! We're opening Saturday the 15th of July, so make sure you're there. It's gonna be gas. [upbeat music]
