SELF MASTERY- When You Are In Control Of You The World Can’t Be. By R.C. BLAKES

good evening good evening good evening good evening so glad to be able to talk to you tonight and if this is your first time being on my channel I Marcy Blake's and I'm a pastor I'm an author and I love to talk to people I'm not a therapist a lot of people think I am but I'm not I'm not a counselor I'm not a psychologist I'm a pastor and I'm a man and I've I've lived and I've experienced some things and I love to share what I've learned with the world I love it I absolutely love it I love my life and so this is why you see me coming to you by way of this platform it's my connection to the world I want to jump right in and I want to deliver this content as you know as you may know or should know by now in two weeks we're having our first queen ology conference of 2020 we were supposed to have gone to various parts of the world this year but kovat 19 prevented that and so the idea came from a group of spiritual daughters who say well why don't you do a cyber conference and allow the world to participate and as I said okay I had never done anything online I've never done a webinar or anything like that the most I've done are online programs never done a webinar and as I said yes and so July the 25th and the 26th of this month July we are having queen ology what we call 2.0 and it's really the beginnings of the next message it's going to actually this is really an introduction to the next book the first book was father/daughter talk which I'm gonna start talking a little more about some of you have not heard father/daughter talk and I encourage you to go back and look at some of those old videos really old videos where I'm discussing the chapters of father/daughter talk and then the message evolved into queen ology and now the message is in queen ology what I'm calling queen ology 2.0 the training for reigning once you once you wake up and you see this this throne and you're you're you've situated this crown now you have the responsibility of actually doing something with it you actually have to reign and so this is where the conversation is going in in two weeks and we have last I checked two nights ago we have like 14 different countries that have registered for this conference it's literally going to be worldwide 14 different countries four different continents last time I checked are going to be some people are going to be on the platform is you know like 2:00 3:00 in the morning to be a part of this experience it's it's going to be amazing if you've not registered you can go to IRC blix comm and it's right on the front page if not just look under live events and you see it there everything's going to be online it's going to be absolutely amazing tonight I want to look at something that I'm really just kind of cherry picking out of the queen ology message I want to look at something thank you I want to look at something that I'm cherry picking out of the queen ology message I'm trying to stay on point because so many of our dear sisters and brothers you know I really took to heart I take to heart rather people who are sincerely here to glean and to to learn and to grow and I realize in having so many conversations that there's so many people come to this channel for healing and so I want to deliver the content and then I'll do all of my personal stuff you know that I love to do in terms of talking to you when I'm done because I don't want anybody to miss what God is trying to deliver this is as much ministry as it is social interaction in fact I think it's more ministry than it is social so I'll just say thank you and I'll address you when I'm done but this is something that I picked out of the queen ology message and in queen ology and on the day of the conference I'm going to revisit what we call the five tenants of queen ology and if you've if you've attended clean ology in any part of the United States you know we we spend about three or four hours and we start off talking about the five tenants or attended as a principal or a belief that drives a certain philosophy about how one lives and the here are the facts Ennis I won't go over all of them but number one is self-awareness number two is self mastery number three is self projection number four is self sufficiency and number five is self actualization so number one self awareness deals with the Queen's identity number two self mastery deals with the woman's discipline number three self projection deals with the woman's confidence number four self sufficiency deals with the woman's independence and number five self actualization deals with the woman's manifesting all that's within her I want tonight to deal with self mastery and since I'm dealing with with this particular tenant self mastery I will give you the tenant and if we were in if we were in conference mode you would be repeating after me and it reads like this I am in possession of myself no one has access to my control I am mastering my emotions relationships sexuality spirituality and financial choices self-mastery the governance of one's self now when we think about this self mastery dealing with personal disciplines when you think about this and you look at you look at the typical sister that you know and even if you look introspective ly and objectively at yourselves many of you have to admit and mind you this lesson I know that there's some brothers listening this mesen message is applicable to men as well though I delivered this to women the principles are the same so listen from a man's perspective very few do you know who are really in control of themselves and one of the statements I make is that if if you are not in control of yourself someone else is the would-be queen king is often struggling to break free from the puppet strings especially women well definitely women in this respect the puppet strings of misogyny where the world conditions you socially conditions you to believe certain things from a patriarchal from a toxic patriarchal perspective and that's what the world is filled with I do believe in patriarchy in the sense that fathers ought to be present fathers ought to protect fathers ought to teach fathers ought to guide but the world uses patriarchy in a toxic sense to diminish the value of the woman to make the woman feel subconsciously usually this message is indirect but it absolutely brings the woman into a state of mind that she is subservient she is the basically the slave which the term where the term comes from female slave conditioning she's the slave to perverted male society the multitude of voices have come together to dismantle the woman's self image self perspective self-worth self value and so now we're in a place in society where the queen especially must regain self mastery and if we shift this to the the men there's there's nothing more crucial there's nothing more destructive to a society than men who are not self controlled I was talking to a young man today one of my spiritual sons and I was saying to him because he's starting to experience a lot of good success and I was saying to him one of the things you will have to be mindful of as you succeed is the eagle whenever a man begins to succeed and things begin to happen the Eagle takes over and the Eagle drives the man in directions that are are what vulnerable to flattery you know his usually his sexuality gets out of control his his financial choices become warped and he loses it he before he can actually rise to his full potential he dismantles it by his own childish behavior because there's no what no self mastery thank you self mastery is the synergy watch this listen to this very carefully self mastery is the synergy between the body the mind and the spirit again self-mastery is synergy between your body what you do with your physicality your mind your thoughts and your spirit that part of you where God dwells and where God speaks the purest part of you is your spirit and when you when you move into a place of self-mastery what happens is the purest part of you informs your soul your mind your will and your emotions and your mind your will and your emotions then inform your behavior it's called self mastery when a person lacks self mastery when there's no synergy between the body the mind and the spirit what happens is a person may have a particular interval if in his or her spirit but may be contradicted in his or her mind which will prevent it from ever being carried out in his or her life so you have people who are watch this behaving in ways that don't agree with their core what do you mean by that okay I'll tell you what I mean by that that's how you end up in the bed of a man and then go home and cry all night because your shame of what you did it's because there's no self mastery there's no synergy between your body your mind and your spirit your spirit desires one thing this is why I always make the statement you cannot always define people by what they do sometimes people are not what they did sometimes people did what they did because they were not in control and because they were not in control somebody else manipulate at the moment because there was no what self mastery so if you're going to live your highest life we have to deal with with this this thing called self mastery you see I'm a faith for husband this is why I come on social media and you know I don't have all the different things where people can't say what they want to say or anybody crazy can come on in and say whatever they want to Facebook Instagram YouTube I don't block people from saying anything it's because I live my life when I would I project myself to be publicly I am privately and I live my life consistently you know from the inside out what you see is what you get and I have thank you and I have nothing to hide I have nothing to hide and why can I say that I have not always been able to say that you all know that you know my testimony I'm able to say that now and because I have embraced this thing called self mastery and I was saying to my young son today one of my son's the day this is not something that thank you this is not something that just happens when I become an older man I was a young man when I committed myself to this way of living where I came to this point where I wanted my life to be consistent I wanted my life to mirror my message to many preachers the reason the church has lost in my opinion the church has lost its impact in the world is because too many people see preachers or preaching one thing and clearly living something else and so I said well I can't be that kind of preacher because I'm not built to be a hypocrite and so I had to embrace the principles of self mastery now in a lot of it is the stuff that I'm going to teach you right now if you've attended clean ology in the past you've heard some of this in proverbs 25 and 28 it says he who has no rule over his own spirit Wow is like a city that is broken down and without walls and in other words you're defenseless if you have no all over your own spirit in other words if you cannot control yourself you are then left as a city without walls you are defenseless so we have to start with this thing called self mastery now let's see something because I have a lot of information and I'm gonna try not to keep you all too long tonight principles of self mastery self mastery starts with emotional intelligence and that's the capacity to be aware of control and the ability to express one's emotions effectively emotion there is no self mastery where there's no emotional intelligence where you you have to you have to be aware of yourself thank you you have to control yourself and you have to watch this you have to also be able to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically emotional intelligence is the ability to know yourself control yourself express your emotions properly and also deal with people in a proper fashion now some of the components of emote some of the components of emotional emotional intelligence intelligence are self-awareness self-control adaptability empathy being able to okay self-awareness that speaks for itself stability to recognize your own emotions especially in the moment when arise which is often the easiest time to get swept away by your emotions self-control once you recognize your emotions self-control means you're able to manage them with relative calm adaptability because life is fluid in circumstances are bound to change on a dime it many times leaves us frustrated and unsure of how to move forward adaptability is akin to going with the flow being able to move with whatever the situation is whatever the circumstances are and then empathy all of this is emotion goes into emotional intelligence there is no self mastery where there's no emotional intelligence empathy is being empathetic means having the ability to see from the perspective of others and respond naturally to their feelings you know without allowing them to manipulate you because there is such a thing as toxic empathy and then there's relationship management that that fits under this thing called emotional intelligence relationship management means to develop relationships intentionally and on terms that are healthy and suit yours and the other person's interest best interest it involves possessing the ability to move on watch this from relationships without breaking down as well as allowing others to go without it destroying you thank you now bouncing off of this thing relative to relationship management being a part of emotional intelligence being a major part of self-mastery your first relationship goal should be to have one with yourself I pause like that because I want you to those of you that it kind of hits you like a ton of bricks you're not I mean when I make statements like that it hits you like a ton of bricks and it almost knocks the wind out of you I want you to pause and I want you to breathe just take a breath because sometimes when truth like this comes at us it can be overwhelming and it can it can feel abrasive but it's it's it's a necessary it's a necessary impact your first relationship goal should be to have one with yourself many of you lack self mastery because you never allowed yourself thank you you never allowed yourself the time to learn you you kind of threw yourself into the arms and into the life of another person before you really knew you and if you don't have a relationship with you what happens is other people then step into your life and they mold you into the image they want you to be in this is how you get old dudes now I'm gonna make a statement here and I don't want anybody to think that older dudes and younger women never works I personally I know a couple of relationships where there's an older man that sincerely loves a younger woman and she sincerely loves him and it works and now I also believe that the unfortunate truth is that most of the time you got an old man looking for a young woman you know there's a lot of shady stuff on the line but this is how you get young women that get taken in by older men before they even have a relationship with themselves and this older man uses all of this life experience or her and he manipulates in monopolizes her entire life and here she is she's a mother and now maybe even a grandmother and has no clue who she is in the world much less mastering herself she doesn't even know herself you have to know yourself to master yourself thank you now here's a statement I made do not invest more love into a relationship then you can emotionally afford to lose breathe do not invest more love this is a rule this is a rule this is a rule okay listen to me you hearing what I'm saying this is a rule for living your life and for embracing relationships do not invest more love than you can emotionally afford to lose this is a part of your emotional intelligence which is a massive part of your what self mastery never love a person beyond the point that you can afford to see them walk away if that happens why is this necessary it is necessary because you can never predict what another person is going to do I have a very loving wife that's on the other side of this wall thank you so much and we had a wonderful marriage for about 25 years now but she's an individual and god forbid but she could very well wake up tomorrow say you know Jana I don't want the old man no mo I'm tired of you I want me another man I want a younger man I gotta go well I have to be emotionally watch this I have to be emotionally stable enough and whole enough as a person I have to be in control of myself enough to be able to let her go without losing my grasp on life even after 25 years of marriage I got to be whole enough emotionally sound enough to be able to hurt and think at the same time or I just said something right there I have to be emotionally whole enough to be able to hurt and think at the same time you should never embrace our relationship out of need and so many of you say I need and I don't like that word when you start talking about relationships it should not be could be because thank you you need a relationship it should be you should desire a relationship because you desire a relationship and you you found the person that fits into your future and watch this you are so complete and so whole as an individual that if they decide today or tomorrow do they want to do something different it will never subtract from you okay okay I wanted okay I started to go get some huge yellow mellow illustration about the shoes well when I bring I have tennis shoes right over there but when I bring the left shoe and the right shoe together they become a what pair if I separate the right shoe from the left it becomes a what it still is should I say it's not even becoming it already was I left you would still the left shoe with or without the right shoe it's still a left shoe you have to be emotionally whole and individual enough that when another person joins to you you can appreciate that dynamic and if another person is gone suddenly you can still stand on your own two feet as a whole individual you should never invest more love than you can emotionally afford to lose when you start loving so-called loving a person beyond the point that you can say if they leave today or tomorrow it'll hurt but I can I can deal with it when you when if you're beyond that point you've moved outside of the parameters of what is a healthy love dynamic now as a woman as a woman in particularly you must study the nature of men because listen to this very carefully because ignorance of the man's nature is the number one cause of a woman's emotional breakdown thank you too many women watched this war a man before she knows anything about how men function or operate this is why I started teaching the kind of stuff I teach because so every woman wants a man but no woman understands the nature of a man you know on the illustration I used the other day on a particular platform I was talking on teaching on it was a private thing the illustration I used is that when you go to the zoo you can go to the zoo and you know sometimes they'll have a little Adam a little docile animal sheep or you know whatever the other little docile animals are they have mouths for the children a pet and all that sometimes they have little monkeys out and people get in see the little monkey playing with a marker take pictures with the monkeys and all of that but you never go to the zoo and see them with a little lion out on the sidewalk why don't they put them in fact they put to keep the lion behind a gate and usually they have right beyond the gate is a very deep deep ditch that if the lion were to get down in a ditch he can't jump out of the ditch over the gate or he can't jump from where he's at over the ditch over the fence that's why do they keep the lion behind the gate it's because they know the nature of the lion and it's their knowledge of the nature of the lion that dictates the boundaries between them and the lion when you mouths monroe said it put it best dr. Myles Munroe said when you know the nature of a thing its behavior does not surprise you you know like I watch you know YouTube video sometimes people that love the going these safaris I want to do this one day I want to go on a safari I won't go to Africa I want to go on a safari but I want to make certain that it's a very stern vehicle with a very serious cage because I know the nature of these animals you see I see these videos where these people go on safaris and they're getting all out in the truck and they with the cameras taking pictures of the aunt of the lion in the pull line ghetto or the poor people get eat about a lion I'm like you know I felt it from the beginning cuz I know why would you go out there self-mastery starts with emotional intelligence that's my point number two under self mastery is that self mastery also involves now watch this this is where you're gonna have to really take a serious deep breath self mastery involves sexual reom bracing sexual integrity as long as you out of control sexually this goes for the sisters and the brothers as long as you're out of control sexually you will never be in control of your life and you know we've always kind of embraced and known that the brothers have been out of control sexually but what we're coming to learn now is that as many women out of control sexually as men and when a woman is out of control sexually that is the steering wheel that a perverted male Society uses to drive the woman into bondage and then you see now I got to say it I gotta say it you know I really would love to be politically correct I want all y'all to love me and want y'all I really do I love it but I gotta say it you all have gotten so slave conditioned now that you're defending sexual immorality you trying to make me believe that somehow there's nothing wrong with you sleeping with one man after another after another after another that you ain't married to and you want me to agree with that you you want you want me to agree with that as a father as a man as a grandfather as as a pastor there's no way in the world I can agree with that if if I didn't even believe in Jesus Christ wasn't save what no Christian I could be an atheist I would still tell you it ain't right for a woman to go and lay her body down for a man that's not laid his life down for her it's fundamentally wrong for a woman to give the most precious thing on the planet listen to me very well the most precious thing i'ma keep calm I don't want to get loud i'ma keep calm yo see I but see I control down the night I'm very disciplined nice hard but I'm disciplined the most precious thing on the planet to a man is a woman but when you don't know your value when you don't know your value the world will consume you for pennies on the dollar and so for a woman that says you know I I desire this thing called self mastery you got to get back to sexual integrity you you can no longer be you cannot you can no longer continue to be a booty call a booty call your wife you know you're not you not have you're not a man's booty call you mean a dude just call you on Friday and pass through for 25 30 minutes a booty call a week come on man come on man you'll never master yourself if you don't regain your sexual integrity and we talked about how all these men are dogs but if the women if the sisters came together and said well we don't we don't live our lives right homie ain't got no else to play everybody took their ball and going home listen to my definition of sexual integrity is guiding you it is guiding your sexual life according to your moral compass and in accordance with your life's goals purpose and realization of your true Worth it is the refusal to be a sexual hypocrite that's a term that I that I coined a sexual hypocrite now what's the sexual hypocrite an individual who is caught up in a sexual existence that disagrees with her core values or with his core values they they don't believe listen to this they don't believe that their sexual lifestyle is right and they are often internally troubled by their own sexual behavior you're doing things that you fundamentally disagree with now in in the book of Romans the writer describes a situation he says in Romans 7 verses 18 and 19 he says if I know that nothing good dwells within me that is in my flesh I can will what is right but I cannot perform it I have the intention and urge to do what is right but no power to carry it out I lacked I like control I lack mastery for I fail to practice the good deeds I desire to do but the evil deeds that I do not desire to do are what I am always doing now here's the crisis of the sexual hypocrite and I've been a sexual hypocrite where I was performing sexual acts that disagree with my core belief we kind of talked about that in the beginning and I would I would do the acts and then would be troubled in my spirit almost immediately after you know but the crisis of the sexual hypocrite is that they either addicted to the lifestyle you can become addicted to the lifestyle the sexual lifestyle and sex can become an addiction or there's a significant relationship tied up in the sexual behavior your relationship with someone that you consider to be a significant other and maybe you assume maybe you're hoping that this can go the distance and the relationship you've allowed it to be based upon the sexual behavior or you've you watch this and here's here's the saddest reality of the crisis of the sexual hypocrite number one we says that they either addicted to the lifestyle they are addicted to the sex on number two there's a significant relationship tied up in the sexual behavior if I alter the sexual behavior it may dismantle the relationship which is probably more like a situation ship or number three you view your total self-worth as connect to performing sexually you view your total self-worth as connected to performing sexually and see this is where this is where the world thank you this is where the world has broken the consciousness of the Queen and broken the woman down to a point where the woman actually she actually now believes that she is not worth anything outside of her sexual appeal or her sexual performance this is why this is why and I'm talking to you like a father now or big brother or an uncle or just to do that's concerned this is why you wear the clothes you wear or should I say the clothes you don't wear you can't justify walking around these streets half a neck it like you are and they'll make me believe try to think that's right you got all of your all your breasts out and all this and all the the cheeks of yourself out and something so short you got to pull on it every step you make to keep keep yo your rayon from coming out up under that thing why are you doing it you have better sense than that you're more intelligent than that but you've been you've been female slave conditioned to actually believe that you have to perform sexually for a perverted male society to be recognized why is that it's because most of your fathers were not present to pour into your self-esteem bank and so you grew up though you grew up chronologically you're still a little girl searching for affirmation from a father who never gave it to you so subsequently you now turn your attention to men and you need men to say you're valuable you're beautiful you're wonderful and so the male society teaches you okay dress half naked and and and perform sexually and will approve of you and they parade all of the the so-called hip-hop stars or the R&B stars on the stage all of them naked they got something you know tape right cross state you know situation right there they on the stage and slit way up there and all in behind out and you looking at that and you see all the men applauded and that all and that's a part of your conditioning my dear and the world is teaching you do what we tell you to do sexually and we'll clap for you balls down to the world views you don't know better than a monkey that performs for peanuts and that's the crisis of the sexual bakra test that's a lesson in itself actually yeah I have addicted to the lifestyle there's a significant relationship tied into the sexual behavior or you you now view your total self-worth is being connected to performing sexually Wow's over 40 minutes well now since I've gone there and you've had a few moments to breathe let's talk about how does one regain sexual integrity number one I think we talked about this previously number one stop lying to yourself and see this is this is big for women women frequently perpetuate their self-defeating dysfunctional behavior because they just won't accept the obvious truth that the relationship or the situation ship is not love it is lust and it is deception it is not love stop calling it love it's not it never was love it was lust from day one it was never love and you know I went I went through this thing some some years ago asking myself why do women in particularly tend to live in this fantasy world when it comes down to loving relationships with men and here's here's the wisdom of the Holy Spirit Holy Spirit said when women generally when women enter into a loving relationship that is that that turns sexual even if it's outside of the parameters of God's will when a woman enters into a sexual generally when a woman enters into a sexual relationship with a man she comes into that relationship from a place of sincere love or affection she has she has real honest earnest intentions and she believes somewhere in our heart that this can go to distance and and though I may be a maybe approaching it the wrong way this can ultimately end up at the right place even though I'm coming from through the back door I'm doing it doing it doing it backwards but a woman typically enters into a relationship like that with a sincere love or affection she at least thinks it's there a man can have sex in knowing all of them it is so because the woman enters in with all of these hopes and all of these desires and you know this sincere love and this this deep affection listen to this very carefully this is going to help some of you you're not you're not you're not foolish you know you know you're not there's nothing wrong with you because it's hard for you to accept I'm getting ready to help you understand why it's hard for you to accept the truth you know thank you I'm getting ready to help you to see why it's hard for you to accept the truth you know and to move on it is very difficult for the woman who has entered into such a relationship to process in her mind listen listen that the man did not have mutual feelings that she gave everything she had and more than she should have given and now she's faced with the reality that the man she gave this to did not have mutual feelings she's given her all and he was just playing games it's hard for her to process that and rather than watch this watch this rather than accept that hard difficult truth the woman would rather hold out hope I can make him love me I can make him love me I can love him so much that he will realize my Worth and my value there's something very there's something very distinct about between little boys and grown men if you give a little boy a full carat priceless diamond you know what he's gonna do he's gonna lose it before the Sun Goes Down that's what he's gonna you take a little 12 yo boy give him a give him a just a loose stone and say man this is this is worth you know thank you $700,000 flawless it's you know he's gonna say oh that's pretty he gonna loose it lose it before the Sun Goes Down you take a man and you put that same diamond in a man's hand and you say this is a priceless diamond he's gonna put it in a safe a little boys gonna lose it in the grass why what's the difference between a little boy and a man the understanding of value you cannot teach a little boy value time and experience has to teach him that and there there are too many occasions where women have given their all and their most precious gifts to little boys just because he has a grown man's body doesn't mean that he's a man and the Bible says in Proverbs 13 and 12 Hope deferred makes the heart sick in other words when I when I'm really hoping for something and it never manifests it makes me sick on the inside and so rather than accepting the truth the woman desires to avoid the pain to the point that she develops what I call this may sound harsh but this is the way I delivered it in in in in queen ology and the queen ology conferences she developed selective stupidity and what is selective stupidity it's when you know you're dealing with a little boy he's already mismanaged and mishandled your most precious gifts and you stay with him believing that somehow you can produce something different than what you've already gotten it but if you're going to come into this place of self-mastery you got to regain your sexual integrity and that starts with stop lying to yourself let me hurry now then let Abby you got to forgive yourself you got to forgive yourself you know you're just sitting around holding this stuff against yourself for being human you human like everybody else you know all these people on here trying to make you believe that somehow you the only one that slept around you the only one had a baby out of wedlock come on now all of us and done some stuff very few poke on here who've not done some of that stuff I just mentioned it and and you can forgive everybody else but yourself you got to forgive yourself you you you you know you can't move beyond the thing if you can't forgive yourself you got to be able to look at that it's okay yeah that's what I did but it's not who I am I learned the lessons from that and now I've moved on you got to forgive yourself and you got to get rid of anybody in your life that tries to to handcuff you to some negative point in your past listen to what the Bible says in John eight 10 and 11 it says when Jesus lifted himself up and saw none but the woman this is the woman that was caught in adultery they brought to Jesus and in Jesus wrote something on the ground he said to them me whoever doesn't have sin cast the first stone the Bible says when he lifted himself up and saw that none but the woman with him he said unto her woman where are those thine accusers hath no man condemned thee she said no man Lord and Jesus said unto her neither do i condemn go and sin no more God doesn't condemn you I'm living proof of that the earth should have opened up and swallowed me up years ago I know y'all think I'm just you know I appreciate the love I get from all over the world y'all just love me you just honor me you respect me but trust me homeboy was a mess the stuff I teach all about is the stuff I used to do and God never condemned me he convicted me and any cleanse me and then he restored me and then he put me here to use me but he would have never been able to use me if I did not forgive myself a part of my self mastery was learning to forgive myself for the things I had done and moving forward and then let us see under regaining your sexual integrity you got to refocus on your future you got to get a you have to get a definite point that you're trying you're striving to reach for the reason many of you are so consumed and and I you know I hear you when you reach out to me but I don't hear you when y'all try to make when y'all try to convince me that our relationship is so important that you losing your mind the mere fact that you losing your mind about a relationship means that you have a you have parts of your life that you need to get on track now I know Yelp some of y'all don't oh you ain't got to agree with everything I say but honestly the mere fact you sitting there desperate and and youuuu stuck because you need a relationship so bad it means that there's certain parts of your life that ain't that am intact anybody that has a vision and is in pursuit of that vision does not have the time to be breaking down worrying about when as a man come in or when is a woman come in in fact about it if you live in your life the right way one of the biggest things you gonna have to be concerned about when you get a relationship is finding a person that can accommodate you and all the stuff that comes along with you you just sitting around all day stressing over I need a man I wanna have sex babe you've got some stuff you need to work on you need to define your vision if if if you want to recover and if you want to regain your sexual integrity you've got to have a vision because your vision will keep you preoccupied and most of the people that fall off and stuff they don't have any business in our people who do not have a glimpse of a preferred future that they're reaching for now in Philippians 3 13 and 14 Paul says brethren I count not myself to have apprehended but this one thing I do forgetting those things which are behind reaching forth unto those things which are before you got to have something in front of you that you're reaching for I did number three main point number three self mastery is based in knowing how to love in order maybe I shut this down cuz it's getting a little lengthy self masters knowing is based in knowing how to love in order in Matthew 22 35 to 39 says then one of them which was a lawyer asked him and questioned tempting him and saying master which is the Great Commandment in the law jesus said unto him thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart with all thy soul with all thy mind this is the first and Great Commandment and the second is like unto it thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself so loving in the right articles like this love God with all thank you thank you love God with all watch this number 2 after loving God love yourself and then number three love everybody else watch this now out of your God and self love that's loving in order see many times you're loving people more than you love God more than you love yourself thank you you have to learn to love God with all love yourself and then love everybody else out of your God and self love now let me give you this when you fail to master loving and I'm almost done when you fail to master loving in the right order it is perverted into things like codependency and lust which takes you completely out of self control there's no such thing as self mastery when you become a codependent and you're driven by lust let's look at love versus lust the great deceptions of lust lust number one is a strong desire for sexual gratification it's a strong desire drive for sexual pleasure love is a strong feeling of affection and concern toward another person as that arising from kinship or close friendship it's a strong feeling of affection and concern for another person that may be accompanied by sometimes accompanied by within a holy context sexual attraction it's a feeling of devotion or adoration love has moral boundaries lust has no moral limitations love is fulfilled can be fulfilled lust is never satisfied watch this love gives while lust is always taking love bills while lust is always breaking so the anatomy of lust equals this feels good looks good feeds your ego and Bible says in first John 2 and 16 for all that is in the world the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the pride of life is not of the Father but is of the world so you got to know how to love in order and know the difference between love versus lust now the deception of lust let me give you this and then I promise you I'm done after this this is a lot Lew my goodness this is a lot of teaching stay with me for one one minute for about five minutes and we're gonna pray a prayer at the end of this the deception of lust number one well all of this is under point num number three self mastery is basting knowing how to love in order and knowing how to love in order is also understanding the difference between love versus lust here's the deception of lust the physical connection is misinterpreted as love sex does not mean love write down Genesis 29 verses 21 through 35 read that in your leisure that's where Jacob hated his wife Elia but he kept making babies with her because sex does not mean love but one of the deceptions of lust is that the physical connection is misinterpreted as love secondly the euphoria of lust is addictive the euphoria of lusts see you got to understand these things if you're going to come into a place of self mastery because some of you are being managed by the spirit of lust and you don't know why you're buying into this idea that the physical connection is love and it's not it never was love it was always a lie the euphoria of lust is addictive there is a there's a there's a demonic there's a demonic euphoria that accompanied is a sexual relationship that does not agree with God's will that becomes addictive listen to what the Bible says in proverbs 6:23 through 27 it says for the commandment is a lamp and the law is light and reproofs of instruction of the way of life to keep thee from the evil woman from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman lust night after her beauty in banheart neither let her take thee with her eyelids for by means of a [ __ ] woman a man has brought a piece of bread and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life can a man take fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burned it becomes addictive the sexual addiction creates a sexual soul tie to a person that feels good to you but it's toxic for you and so thus you have it a PhD woman manipulated by a GED man or King that loses his kingdom because he can't shake the harlot number 3 your moral standards are shattered by lust here's the deception of lust physical connection is misinterpreted as love the euphoria of lust is addictive your moral standards are shattered by lust you you play around with lust you won't even recognize your your your thought life anymore your standards will drop so far god I might have been only our lusts we'll introduce you to parts of yourself you'll be ashamed to meet lust we'll have a woman giving away husband benefits to boyfriends it's like quicksand is easy to get into but you may never exit it and number four lust diminishes your capacity now this is powerful yeah I'll read this and then we'll pray this prayer the deception of lust if you don't learn how to love in order and you get caught up in lust and you stay there lust diminishes your capacity to accept or give real love when you have been driven by lust you don't know how to recognize you don't know how to receive and you don't know how to reciprocate real love so when you have as as as a woman especially when you have had nothing but one relationship after another that's been driven by nothing but lust when a real man shows up to love you you don't you won't even recognize it you won't be attracted to it you won't know how to receive it and you certainly won't know how to reciprocate it because you're your soul has been so skewed by the lust the reason lust hinders the capacity to receive love is because love comes from the spirit and lust is all about flesh now let's pray this prayer and then imma let you let you all go lust destroys intimacy let's pray this prayer and I want you all wherever you are to repeat after me I think my battery is it's getting bad here getting low not good I want you to pray this prayer with me Heavenly Father I repent for every season of my life that has been lived carelessly and recklessly I was never created to be oblivious gullible or powerless I'd announce every natural or spiritual influence that has taken my life out of balance I thank you for breaking every soul tie and restoring my empty self-esteem I am strong I am powerful and I am in control amen so I didn't mean to take up a whole hour of your time tonight but I wanted to come on here and just to share this with you it was just on my heart again I need you to go to RC Blake's comm and register for queen ology 2.0 happening July 2 25th and the 26th those of you who may be dealing with some things and you need to talk to a counselor I'm going to put a link for better help counselling in the description if you follow that link and just kind of vet them for yourself check it out and see if it's something that works for you I'm no counselor but they have licensed professional counselors that can really help you over the phone you know with all of this kovat 19 thing going on I think it's a great opportunity for those of you that need to talk with someone also don't forget to go to my website sign up for my mailing list sign up for my mailing list King ology is available on Amazon the book and the workbook are available I'm getting some great reviews relative to people who have read the book and I thank God that God is bringing men now and just know that Lisa and I love is anything I'm missing me nothing okay now listen if if you're there and this is for those of you there's that really just can't afford it's just $39 the conference is just 39 but if you're there and you just really don't have the resources maybe unemployed and you want to be part Lisa just told me that we do have some sponsors people that have sponsored people and what should they do Lee email the staff at RC Blake's ministries at gmail.com and just let them know that you you you need us you need to be sponsored I want you in the room July the 25th and the 26th it'll be from 1 p.m. Central Standard Time into about three each day on that Sunday the 26th after we're done I'm going to just go sit and have Q&A like I would normally do at a queen ology conference yeah it is a cyber conference so you know when that means you're gonna get a link that's gonna bring you into a room and just like I'm talking to you now you'll be in the room for those three hours and we'll have some breaks between sessions we're gonna have six total sessions and breaks three each day and breaks between each and so we'd love to have you to be a part of it anything else Lee so I love you all thank you for hanging out with me tonight now all of you that sold into our lives tonight I want to say thank you Lee you didn't write the list of the names down did you you did thank them individually I want to thank all of you I'm just trying to make certain that well you know even from my okay that's another thing I need to talk about I do have a podcast that you can catch on iTunes and so even for the purposes of my podcast not only does my smooth delivery of content work for our people that may be challenged in terms of attention but it also works for the flow of the podcast because sometimes it can get a little confusing if people hear me on iTunes addressing people they don't know that people are interacting with me so you know also follow my iTunes but thank all of you I appreciate all of you I love you I appreciate you so much you are just the very very best I might I said we love you pastor thank you so much pastor your God sent I bet you I love y'all more I bet you I love you all more and i apprec-- with all of my heart and we're looking forward to seeing you in queen ology 2.0 I love to see our countries get up to about 20 tonight we last time I checked we're at 14 I would love to see at least 20 countries in there tonight so those of you from all around the world I feel better laying these burdens I mean lay them down - you're the best god bless you thank you I appreciate you all so much I appreciate you so much Philippines I need you in my conference I can say I got a 15th country Kenya I don't see y'all in my thing that's 16 countries y'all need to register for Queen ology I need you in there yeah we already got you make in there Trinidad and Tobago do we actually get we don't have Trinidad in there yet I need you all in there Australia we have Australia in there so I love you all thank you so much higher from New Jersey I have friends in New Jersey salamat Philippines Dallas Texas I have friends and children in Dallas I love you all thank you so much for hanging out with me and may talk to you too sometime this week tomorrow's my birthday I'll be 56 years old so y'all thank God for just keeping me I'm grateful to be alive I love you God bless you God bless you

Channel: RC Blakes, Jr

Views: 102,471

Rating: 4.9455686 out of 5

Keywords: Dating Advice, Relationships, Christian, Narcissist

Id: yiqsqFO3zN8

Length: 68min 43sec (4123 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 13 2020