Ranking Your SCUFFED Tiktoks

my talking to a ghost yeah my name is schlatt and a couple days ago i asked you guys to send me your favorite tick tocks and honestly i don't know what i expected this is the most threatening thumbnail i think i've ever seen on a video before these tick tocks were hilarious but kind of disturbing at times so enjoy and be sure to check out the new subreddit j schlatt submissions where you guys can submit your own clips say less [Music] [Applause] picks me a khalifa [Music] [Laughter] no no why you [ __ ] upvoted this coconut okay that makes sense why did you wait for the countdown did you want to see men kiss you do you like men you you like kissing you like men hold on before we keep going everybody gotta thank the sponsor of today's video me now you guys know i bought gamer subs not too long ago and not only is the product fantastic and basically all i drink at this point but it has genuinely been the best investment of my life and it's made me a very rich man so i thought to myself if i have all this money and i own a company why not get the company to pay for a helicopter [Music] jerry how the hell are you big guy yes i bought the [ __ ] helicopter have you seen the resale value on the [ __ ] cups yes the ones with the ticks on them jesus christ i gotta go [ __ ] your wife bye [Music] haven't felt this alive since 1999 baby you see boys as a businessman i understand a little something called supply and demand see if the supply of something goes down the demand goes up so i bought some of last season's waifu cups that are reselling for hundreds of dollars on ebay and destroyed them 500 800 and now that their supply is gone i decided i'd make my own the most valuable waifu cup ever [ __ ] made the j slat waifu cup with oh my god look at the [ __ ] tits are we see it guys are we seeing are we getting the tits boys this is your one chance to get this limited edition waifu cup seven days only and then it's gone you can go to gamersups.gg to pick this up for yourself use code slat for 10 off and maybe pick up some blue while you're at it huge tits [Music] hurry up with those chairs spongebob it's after closing and i'd like is this an entire [ __ ] episode of help sorry it's a [ __ ] [ __ ] episode spongebob do you want to watch it i don't know if this is legal first day having a chicken spongebob's looking real good right now secret service team prepared a point where is he going he's gone no way he could miss that he's good eagle will be turning in five four three two he missed his ball he went under the [ __ ] grass timeout this is a new [ __ ] clip they pointed they said joe go that way the sidewalk literally ends ends the sidewalk is over this is the leader of the free world i need to forget about i need to forget about this no we need something to cheer me up if it's 10 seconds at a time it's free use [Music] that's crazy that's so that's such a great moment between hello my name is schlatt and a couple of days ago i asked you guys to give me your best 911 impressions oh my god this guy is literally the twin towers now what's funny uh-huh this is one of the planes brilliant beautiful costume what's this building seven don't let the feds find out about that one great impression i did not say that guys timeout the clip doesn't lie guys you gotta cut me i don't know what's going on today [Laughter] i don't know what's going on today don't deliver but you do who's this this is an italian tri-splitter oh it's used by the mafia to move around large amounts of money you can divide a us one dollar bill into third you divide what is the [ __ ] cat dude what is the [ __ ] cat doing in the bag that's not a [ __ ] cat i'm going all the way back i'm going all the way back what the [ __ ] is this [Music] any weapons today guns knives pepper spray any weapons on you at all no but the girls say i'm the bomb [Laughter] blow up that's funny this is a bomb you know welcome to [ __ ] i will now show you [ __ ] a beautiful village situated on the doorstep of the austrian alps here we have the [ __ ] school where having children learn everything there is to know i must say i more and more enjoy [ __ ] children they are no no no what is your food well empty i love the people that put captions on their animals like they know what you're saying oh that thing does not have there's not a single thought going on in the mind of this cat speaking of [Music] do you like chocolate yeah [Music] i still got ben on my phone man i still got ben hold on he's on the newspaper right now he's busy all right dude really going to mock me i'm calling them [Music] is joe biden doing a good job running this country that's what i'm saying that's what i'm saying dude are you dollar cost averaging into the s p 500 right now really okay all right are you raising rent on all your tenants like you should be exactly dude and listen are we evicting the ones who complain exactly dude liz i always knew you were a good one all right let's hit me up you ever need tips on oh my [ __ ] god what on earth um ben are you going to kill me tonight yes oh what's she doing in there what's he doing in there [Music] ew what the [ __ ] is this rat there's nothing funny about that guys take a look at the photo comparison of our commander-in-chief there he is juxtaposed with vladimir putin the picture of him riding the bike with with the bike commonwealth that's such [ __ ] [ __ ] horse and all that and obama was riding a bike with a helmet on how could you was joe wearing a helmet when he took that tumble case closed [Music] looking exasperated and alone [Music] dude i'm starting to think it's not a joke anymore like how many practical jokes is this guy gonna play before we start to believe him [Laughter] it's in here look he's got the [ __ ] helmet on i'll see ya three things you should never say to an alpha no did you just tell me no oh number two there's a fine line between reality and satire that these people walk and sometimes i just can't tell but i can tell you one thing the dude is not an alpha he's got his [ __ ] seat belt on do you see that [ __ ] do you see that line right there boys he's a [ __ ] seat belter number four things you never say to an alpha put your seatbelt on i think differently okay if i get into an accident at 80 miles per hour on the highway and i plunge through that windshield and go out into the road that's perfect i'll land on my feet why would i want to be in that car anyways it crashed oh brother you only arrest for the purpose of dealing with a felony that's committed and i don't count drunk driving as a felony we did it we [ __ ] did it holy [ __ ] holy [ __ ] we [ __ ] did it god bless i always i've said this for years it is the drunk crashers it's the drunk crashers that get us in trouble they said a terrible terrible example for the rest of drunk drivers who who can do who and and [Music] hold on i gotta watch that again that's just crazy though that he's doing a wheelie like you know what i like like he has a little hiccup right there hold on wait where right there yeah there like he just immediately corrects himself like that's just that's just perfect like maybe like right i could you i could i could use seeing that again we need a break you know we need we need a nice little break i've been waiting to get my hands on cyberpunk only to have it come out a broken mess he had to have known for weeks this game would not be ready to release like how george w bush knew for weeks of bin laden's plans oh my [ __ ] god vitamin water hell yeah dude don't don't do that dude don't drink the whole vitamin water why are you doing that um 135 vitamin waters i want to go home should i play this one sure you want me to play this one many friends are often constipated oh my god it's a very [ __ ] human guy i invented this toilet the design is very humid we just need to sit on it very easy to you lee [ __ ] does he take paypal [Music] no no i think the stream's over i think i'm not watching this one guys this is the most threatening thumbnail i think i've ever seen on a video before does he take paypal is he doing house calls there's a lot of room for there's a lot of opportunity i see in my head oh the [ __ ] moan what's a movie scene you love but is kind of weird rules are it has to have been released in theaters and other people have to know about it hello you stole a [ __ ] parking sign from chase bank no i'm clocking out i'm clucking out of this discussion okay i'm clogging up i know i know what you [ __ ] people are going to say i stole it oh my god come on man no what the [ __ ] stop chat stop it's not funny it's not funny to say this [ __ ] you should not take these [ __ ] things seriously like what are we stealing more [ __ ] street signs and [ __ ] oh he's launching a firework out of there holy [ __ ] holy [ __ ] oh my [ __ ] god can i'm gonna lead us in prayer really quickly guys name of the father son holy spirit you got [ __ ] that's what you get don't touch [ __ ] that's on the road that's meant for traffic okay see i'm right i'm right but it's free but it's free yeah look what happens look what happens my cards are making this really interesting noise whenever oh jesus christ we're not doing weezer this week if there is another weezer tick tock in here i'm i'm gonna flip a coin if there's another if they oh you think i'm you think i'm lying and if it lands on heads the stream is over here comes the airplane not this [ __ ] thing ah this is gonna be a [ __ ] weezer meme whatever album i get i'm going to attempt to play a riff from and what did i say come on stevie wonder all right uh i what did i [ __ ] say we're flipping a coin we're flipping a coin and if it lands on heads then the stream is over over okay you guys win all right it was [ __ ] tails hold on no no no i'm flipping it one more time i'm sorry if we get tails again stream's over let's just keep [ __ ] watching tick tocks jesus christ it's your boy everyday and guess what okay if we get if there's a if [Music] you think i take three weeks off of streaming and i'll have patience to deal with this [ __ ] but i don't i don't it's hilarious these actually suck dude they actually suck oh great crucified jesus christ jesus christ transformer jesus christ he's got the nike's oh uh

Channel: jschlattLIVE

Views: 3,256,266

Keywords: jschlatt, jschlattlive, jschlatt livestream, schlatt, livestream, twitch, jschlatt twitch, jschlatt livestream highlights

Id: fMvLPkuYbIg

Length: 16min 38sec (998 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 20 2022